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Surviving the Holidays
Finding An Agent That’s Right For You
Fellowship Meal Every Monday night 6:15
pm to 6:45 pm. Great Food! Great Price! Relax
and eat a home cooked meal ($4.00 suggested
donation).
Child Care is provided by RESERVATION
ONLY a week in advance. Call Jeanne Black-
ston at 813.264.8735 to make a child care res-
ervation. If you are unable to attend and do not
cancel your child care reservation, we will no
longer be able to offer your child care.
Walt’s Café Join us in Student Hall 1 after
your small group for refreshments and snacks.
This is a great time to meet new friends, find a
Sponsor, or Accountability Partner/Team.
Step Groups The men and women’s step
groups are now closed. Please see the resource
table for sign ups for the next groups that are
planned to start in January.
Spring Classes Begin Abundant Life groups
will begin January 15th and are listed in the
LCU catalog for the Spring Semester. Look for
the new catalog in December. You can sign up
for classes at www.idlewild.org/lcu.
Your Testimony If you have worked the 12
Steps and are interested in giving your testimo-
ny on Monday night please send your written
testimony to [email protected].
coming soon >>>
in this issue >>>
Serenity Prayer >>>
In The Next Issue
Small Group Spotlight
Recovery Tool Kit
12th Step Work
Upcoming Events
Surviving the Holidays
Happy Birthday ...
Small Group Spotlight
News & Announcements
Recovery Thoughts
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot
change, the courage to change the
things I can, and wisdom to know
the difference.
Living one day at a time, enjoy-
ing one moment at a time; accept-
ing hardships as the pathway to
peace; taking as Jesus did this sin-
ful world as it is, not as I would
have it; trusting that You will
make all things right if I surrender
to Your Will; so that I may be rea-
sonably happy in this life and su-
premely happy with You forever
in the next.
Amen.
~ Reinhold Niebuhr
Adapted from an article by Laura Petherbridge by Scott A. Schuler
For those experiencing a loss, October through December can be excruciat-
ingly painful months. Even though we are celebrating recovery we could
be dealing with; death, separation, divorce, illness, family trauma, job loss
or moving to a new location. This could result in great losses that make the
holidays difficult. Celebrating recovery involves many steps and hurdles.
The holiday season (Thanksgiving,
Christmas & New Year) is often the most
stress full time of year.
Therefore, here are a few practical tips.
PREPARE – The ambush
of emotions can attack at
any time; prepare before-
hand.
ACCEPT the difficulty of
this time of year and your
loss. Remind yourself that
it’s a season and it will pass.
SOCIALIZE – Don’t hibernate. Insecure
feelings may tempt you to isolate, but force
yourself to go out even if it’s only for a
short time.
LOWER your expectations – Movies and
songs paint an unrealistic picture of the
holidays.
DON’T ANESTHETIZE the pain with
drugs or alcohol – Numbing emotional
distress with chemicals creates more de-
pression.
TRIMMING – If old orna-
ments or trimmings cause too
much pain, don’t hang them
this year. Put them aside for
another time.
GET UP AND MOVE –
Take care of your physical
well-being. Healthy foods
will give you strength; fat-
tening and sugar-filled foods can worsen
your depression. Exercise produces natural
stress reducers.
SHOP online if going to the mall is too
stressful.
COPING STRATEGY – Have the phone
Plan ahead for this
holiday season.
Prepare for when
times may get diffi-
cult.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life
and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 (ESV)
®
CCCELEBRATEELEBRATEELEBRATE
RRRECOVERYECOVERYECOVERY A CA CA CHRISTHRISTHRIST ---CCCENTEREDENTEREDENTERED RRRECOVERYECOVERYECOVERY PPPROGRAMROGRAMROGRAM
llleeetttttteeerrr newsnewsnews Volume VII Issue IV • Fall 2013Volume VII Issue IV • Fall 2013Volume VII Issue IV • Fall 2013
News & Announcements
4 1
WE ARE A SAFE PLACE
Celebrate Recovery is a safe place to
share your hurts, habits and hang– ups
What is said in the groups stays in the
groups!
Recovery Humor
Bell Shoals Baptist Church Friday, 6:00 pm
2102 Bell Shoals Road
Brandon, FL 33511
813-689-4229, ext. 432
Cypress Point Community
Tuesdays, 6:00 pm
15820 Morris Bridge Rd
Tampa, FL 33592
Contact: Dennis Davis
813-986-9100
Exciting Idlewild Baptist
Church
Monday, 7:00 pm
18333 Exciting Idlewild Blvd
Lutz, FL 33558
Contact : Life Discovery Ministry
813-264-8771
Generations Church
Friday, 6:00 pm
1540 Little Road
Trinity, FL 34655
Contact: Joe Plantania
727-375-8801
Harborside Church
Friday, 6:00 pm
200 Marshall St.
Safety Harbor, FL 34695
Contact: Deac Geilig
727-726-0202
Myrtle Lake Baptist Church Friday, 6:30 pm
2017 Reigler Road
Land O Lakes, FL 34639
Contact: Dawn Freijo
813-948-2081
Openwater Church
Tuesday, 7:00 pm
15612 Race Track Road
Odessa, FL 33556
Contact: Eric & Tamara Sims
813-920-9922
South Tampa Fellowship Thursday, 6:30 pm
5101 Bayshore Blvd
Tampa, FL 33611
813-251-1515
Tampa Baptist Church
Sunday, 5:00 pm
300 E. Sligh Ave.
Tampa , FL 33619
Contact: Orville & Linda Renner
813-238-5673
The Crossing Church
Monday, 6:45 pm
10130 Tuscany Ridge Dr.
Tampa, FL 33619
Contact: Gerard Coronado
813-626-0783
If you are traveling, check out
www.CelebrateRecovery.com for
locations across the country.
CELEBRATE RECOVERY LOCATIONS AND CHRIST CENTERED RECOVERY GROUPS
Some of the start times are listed for locations include dinner start time. Please call location
contact for small group start times.
continued on page 2
“The difference between boundaries and barriers is honest transparency. When we erect
a barrier with a person, it’s either because we’re afraid to be honest, tired of being honest and getting hurt, or feel like the relationship isn’t worth the hard work honesty some-
times takes. When we establish boundaries, we are brave enough to be honest but also
compassionate enough to wrap the boundary in grace by clearly communicating the pa-rameters of the relationship. Barriers set relationships on a regressive course that leads to
isolation. Boundaries set relationships on a progressive course that leads to connection.”
~ Lysa TerKeurst (Unglued, pg. 85)
ttthhhooouuuggghhhtttsss......... recovery
H A P P Y B I RT H D AY . . .
Small Group Spotlight >>>
upcoming events >>>
Women’s Freedom from Anger
What does Transforming Prayer have
to do with a Fall Retreat?
Join us at Word of Life in October ...
Got something to say?
The CR Newsletter is looking for a few good
articles about your life in recovery. We are
looking for stories of success and/or failure
to encourage each other in our walk of re-
covery. Testimonies, poems, or any interest-
ing recovery information you have is need-
ed. Please submit your articles to
[email protected] or hand it to some-
one on the Leadership team on Monday
nights. Thanks!
number of your counselor, pastor, church,
close friend or hotline already taped to
your phone. Make the commitment to call
someone if negative thoughts get fierce.
LIGHT – Get some sunshine. Winter
can take its toll on your emotions by the
loss of sun you experience.
INVITE a new (same-sex) friend to see
a movie, have dinner or help decorate
the house.
SET BOUNDARIES – Precisely ex-
plain to your family and friends what
you are capable of doing this year, and
what you aren’t. Don’t let others guilt
you into taking on more than you can
handle.
REACH OTHERS by discovering
people who might be alone during the
holidays.
Plan ahead for this holiday season. Pre-
pare for when times may get difficult.
Work within your small group to have a
partner you can lean on during this
wonderful, but stressful, time of year.
We just celebrated 10 Years of Celebrate Recovery at Idlewild Baptist Church on August 17, 2013. We gathered for a Celebration Worship service where we
recalled how Pastor Henry Bieber started the ministry and recognized those that were active and instrumental in beginning this helpful ministry. We were en-
As the lasts months of the
year are upon us, this can
be a time to reflect on how
far we have come in our
recovery and the people
God has used as light-
houses along that journey.
November is the perfect time to explore
gratitude in our recovery with our minds
already focused on the Thanksgiving holi-
day. We will be looking at Principle 7
(Reserves a daily time for self examination,
Bible reading and prayer in order to know
God and His will for my life and to gain the
power to follow his will.) and Step 11 (We
sought through prayer and medi-
tation to improve our conscious
contact with God, praying only
for knowledge of His will for us
and power to carry that out.) as
a basis for where this tool origi-
nates.
The first time I heard this tool I was sitting
and listing to one of the pastors share this
as a tradition he used in November as a time
to thank the people that had an impact on
him in his recovery.
First, make a list of the people God has used
in your recovery, in the pastor’s example he
had a person for each day of November.
Each day reserve at time to write a letter to
each individual and what they have meant to
you in your journey or of gratitude for them
being in our life. The contents of the letter
are more of what God puts on your heart to
write. Then send the letter to them.
The neat aspect of this is that as you write
these people you will remember how much
there is to be grateful for in your recovery.
couraged by a video testimony of how different lives have been changed
through the years as a result of the CR ministry at Idlewild. We closed the evening with Pastor Ken casting a vi-
sion for the next 10 years and ended the evening with a special anniversary cake!
The following week, some of the lead-ers from CR were privileged to provide a special “CR Appreciation Luncheon”
for the facilities and service people that
work to make sure that everything is ready for Celebrate Recovery meetings
each Monday night. This included the kitchen staff, security staff, facility staff and some from Child Care. The
meal was catered from a local restau-rant and some prizes were drawn and given away. Pastor Phillip and Earl
shared what recovery meant to those that attended and thanked those attend-ing for having a part in this ministry.
How can you help or serve? First, you can share with others that might benefit
from the encouragement and help found at these meetings which are con-fidential and practice anonymity. Sec-
ondly you can pray for those that attend and for the ministry. We have a CR Prayer Team that prays each Monday
from wherever they are. They receive an e-mail reminder on Monday and a
recap on Tuesday. If you are interested you can e-mail [email protected] and request to be added to the CR Pray-
er Team. Thirdly you can attend and see if God has something for you to do or learn, or both at the Monday night
meetings. Please contact Pastor Phillip or Earl and Darlene Burgess if you have any questions.
Transforming Prayer is the theme and study for our Fall 2013 Life Discovery
Ministry Retreat. This weekend is for all facilitators, volunteers, leaders and
anyone who might be interested in serving within the Life Discovery Ministry.
All attendees will receive a personal copy of Transforming Prayer and a jour-
nal. We will begin on Friday October 19th evening and end Saturday night.
You can register online at www.idlewild.org/register. Contact Amy
(813.264.8779 or [email protected]) with any concerns.
“The men who try to do some-
thing and fail are infinitely
better than those who try to do
nothing and succeed.”
~ Lloyd Jones
The Problem, as women
who struggle with anger, we
may not recognize that our anger has foundations in other
basic emotions - usually fear
or pain. These basic emotions
may have become damaged as adults or when we were chil-
dren. Some of us may have
been abused or neglected as children. Others
may have lost a parent or a loved one by their death. Many of us may have been
abused or cheated on by a spouse or boy-
friend.
We may have learned how to express anger inappropriately from our parents, other rela-
tives, or friends. We did not realize that
when we lashed out in anger, we were ig-
noring our fear, pain, or another deeper hurt, habit or hang-up. Others of us did not even
realize we were struggling with anger be-
cause we did not express it, but rather, we
stuffed it down and kept silent.
As our lives and relationships progressed we
may have become addicted to the physical
symptoms of anger. Some of us may have
felt a momentary euphoria as the anger was released. Some of us did not recognize we
were actually hurting our loved ones and our-
selves in the process. In the heat of the mo-
ment, releasing our anger was all that mattered.
Some of us felt our anger was justified based
on the object of anger’s actions, i.e., “If he
hadn’t come home late from work, I wouldn’t
have had to yell at him” ...
Recovery Tool Kit >>>
Gratitude Letters
Q: A:
Surviving the Holidays, continued from page 1
“And let the peace of Christ
rule in your hearts, to which
indeed you were called in one
body. And be thankful.”
Colossians 3:15 (ESV)
Memory Verse
Recovery Quotes
Celebrate Recovery turns TEN YEARS OLD!!!
(continued from above)
3 2
Can relate? See the Resource Table for a pamphlet.
Photo contributed by Rachel
By Earl Burgess
H A P P Y B I RT H D AY . . .
Small Group Spotlight >>>
upcoming events >>>
Women’s Freedom from Anger
What does Transforming Prayer have
to do with a Fall Retreat?
Join us at Word of Life in October ...
Got something to say?
The CR Newsletter is looking for a few good
articles about your life in recovery. We are
looking for stories of success and/or failure
to encourage each other in our walk of re-
covery. Testimonies, poems, or any interest-
ing recovery information you have is need-
ed. Please submit your articles to
[email protected] or hand it to some-
one on the Leadership team on Monday
nights. Thanks!
number of your counselor, pastor, church,
close friend or hotline already taped to
your phone. Make the commitment to call
someone if negative thoughts get fierce.
LIGHT – Get some sunshine. Winter
can take its toll on your emotions by the
loss of sun you experience.
INVITE a new (same-sex) friend to see
a movie, have dinner or help decorate
the house.
SET BOUNDARIES – Precisely ex-
plain to your family and friends what
you are capable of doing this year, and
what you aren’t. Don’t let others guilt
you into taking on more than you can
handle.
REACH OTHERS by discovering
people who might be alone during the
holidays.
Plan ahead for this holiday season. Pre-
pare for when times may get difficult.
Work within your small group to have a
partner you can lean on during this
wonderful, but stressful, time of year.
We just celebrated 10 Years of Celebrate Recovery at Idlewild Baptist Church on August 17, 2013. We gathered for a Celebration Worship service where we
recalled how Pastor Henry Bieber started the ministry and recognized those that were active and instrumental in beginning this helpful ministry. We were en-
As the lasts months of the
year are upon us, this can
be a time to reflect on how
far we have come in our
recovery and the people
God has used as light-
houses along that journey.
November is the perfect time to explore
gratitude in our recovery with our minds
already focused on the Thanksgiving holi-
day. We will be looking at Principle 7
(Reserves a daily time for self examination,
Bible reading and prayer in order to know
God and His will for my life and to gain the
power to follow his will.) and Step 11 (We
sought through prayer and medi-
tation to improve our conscious
contact with God, praying only
for knowledge of His will for us
and power to carry that out.) as
a basis for where this tool origi-
nates.
The first time I heard this tool I was sitting
and listing to one of the pastors share this
as a tradition he used in November as a time
to thank the people that had an impact on
him in his recovery.
First, make a list of the people God has used
in your recovery, in the pastor’s example he
had a person for each day of November.
Each day reserve at time to write a letter to
each individual and what they have meant to
you in your journey or of gratitude for them
being in our life. The contents of the letter
are more of what God puts on your heart to
write. Then send the letter to them.
The neat aspect of this is that as you write
these people you will remember how much
there is to be grateful for in your recovery.
couraged by a video testimony of how different lives have been changed
through the years as a result of the CR ministry at Idlewild. We closed the evening with Pastor Ken casting a vi-
sion for the next 10 years and ended the evening with a special anniversary cake!
The following week, some of the lead-ers from CR were privileged to provide a special “CR Appreciation Luncheon”
for the facilities and service people that
work to make sure that everything is ready for Celebrate Recovery meetings
each Monday night. This included the kitchen staff, security staff, facility staff and some from Child Care. The
meal was catered from a local restau-rant and some prizes were drawn and given away. Pastor Phillip and Earl
shared what recovery meant to those that attended and thanked those attend-ing for having a part in this ministry.
How can you help or serve? First, you can share with others that might benefit
from the encouragement and help found at these meetings which are con-fidential and practice anonymity. Sec-
ondly you can pray for those that attend and for the ministry. We have a CR Prayer Team that prays each Monday
from wherever they are. They receive an e-mail reminder on Monday and a
recap on Tuesday. If you are interested you can e-mail [email protected] and request to be added to the CR Pray-
er Team. Thirdly you can attend and see if God has something for you to do or learn, or both at the Monday night
meetings. Please contact Pastor Phillip or Earl and Darlene Burgess if you have any questions.
Transforming Prayer is the theme and study for our Fall 2013 Life Discovery
Ministry Retreat. This weekend is for all facilitators, volunteers, leaders and
anyone who might be interested in serving within the Life Discovery Ministry.
All attendees will receive a personal copy of Transforming Prayer and a jour-
nal. We will begin on Friday October 19th evening and end Saturday night.
You can register online at www.idlewild.org/register. Contact Amy
(813.264.8779 or [email protected]) with any concerns.
“The men who try to do some-
thing and fail are infinitely
better than those who try to do
nothing and succeed.”
~ Lloyd Jones
The Problem, as women
who struggle with anger, we
may not recognize that our anger has foundations in other
basic emotions - usually fear
or pain. These basic emotions
may have become damaged as adults or when we were chil-
dren. Some of us may have
been abused or neglected as children. Others
may have lost a parent or a loved one by their death. Many of us may have been
abused or cheated on by a spouse or boy-
friend.
We may have learned how to express anger inappropriately from our parents, other rela-
tives, or friends. We did not realize that
when we lashed out in anger, we were ig-
noring our fear, pain, or another deeper hurt, habit or hang-up. Others of us did not even
realize we were struggling with anger be-
cause we did not express it, but rather, we
stuffed it down and kept silent.
As our lives and relationships progressed we
may have become addicted to the physical
symptoms of anger. Some of us may have
felt a momentary euphoria as the anger was released. Some of us did not recognize we
were actually hurting our loved ones and our-
selves in the process. In the heat of the mo-
ment, releasing our anger was all that mattered.
Some of us felt our anger was justified based
on the object of anger’s actions, i.e., “If he
hadn’t come home late from work, I wouldn’t
have had to yell at him” ...
Recovery Tool Kit >>>
Gratitude Letters
Q: A:
Surviving the Holidays, continued from page 1
“And let the peace of Christ
rule in your hearts, to which
indeed you were called in one
body. And be thankful.”
Colossians 3:15 (ESV)
Memory Verse
Recovery Quotes
Celebrate Recovery turns TEN YEARS OLD!!!
(continued from above)
3 2
Can relate? See the Resource Table for a pamphlet.
Photo contributed by Rachel
By Earl Burgess
Surviving the Holidays
Finding An Agent That’s Right For You
Fellowship Meal Every Monday night 6:15
pm to 6:45 pm. Great Food! Great Price! Relax
and eat a home cooked meal ($4.00 suggested
donation).
Child Care is provided by RESERVATION
ONLY a week in advance. Call Jeanne Black-
ston at 813.264.8735 to make a child care res-
ervation. If you are unable to attend and do not
cancel your child care reservation, we will no
longer be able to offer your child care.
Walt’s Café Join us in Student Hall 1 after
your small group for refreshments and snacks.
This is a great time to meet new friends, find a
Sponsor, or Accountability Partner/Team.
Step Groups The men and women’s step
groups are now closed. Please see the resource
table for sign ups for the next groups that are
planned to start in January.
Spring Classes Begin Abundant Life groups
will begin January 15th and are listed in the
LCU catalog for the Spring Semester. Look for
the new catalog in December. You can sign up
for classes at www.idlewild.org/lcu.
Your Testimony If you have worked the 12
Steps and are interested in giving your testimo-
ny on Monday night please send your written
testimony to [email protected].
coming soon >>>
in this issue >>>
Serenity Prayer >>>
In The Next Issue
Small Group Spotlight
Recovery Tool Kit
12th Step Work
Upcoming Events
Surviving the Holidays
Happy Birthday ...
Small Group Spotlight
News & Announcements
Recovery Thoughts
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot
change, the courage to change the
things I can, and wisdom to know
the difference.
Living one day at a time, enjoy-
ing one moment at a time; accept-
ing hardships as the pathway to
peace; taking as Jesus did this sin-
ful world as it is, not as I would
have it; trusting that You will
make all things right if I surrender
to Your Will; so that I may be rea-
sonably happy in this life and su-
premely happy with You forever
in the next.
Amen.
~ Reinhold Niebuhr
Adapted from an article by Laura Petherbridge by Scott A. Schuler
For those experiencing a loss, October through December can be excruciat-
ingly painful months. Even though we are celebrating recovery we could
be dealing with; death, separation, divorce, illness, family trauma, job loss
or moving to a new location. This could result in great losses that make the
holidays difficult. Celebrating recovery involves many steps and hurdles.
The holiday season (Thanksgiving,
Christmas & New Year) is often the most
stress full time of year.
Therefore, here are a few practical tips.
PREPARE – The ambush
of emotions can attack at
any time; prepare before-
hand.
ACCEPT the difficulty of
this time of year and your
loss. Remind yourself that
it’s a season and it will pass.
SOCIALIZE – Don’t hibernate. Insecure
feelings may tempt you to isolate, but force
yourself to go out even if it’s only for a
short time.
LOWER your expectations – Movies and
songs paint an unrealistic picture of the
holidays.
DON’T ANESTHETIZE the pain with
drugs or alcohol – Numbing emotional
distress with chemicals creates more de-
pression.
TRIMMING – If old orna-
ments or trimmings cause too
much pain, don’t hang them
this year. Put them aside for
another time.
GET UP AND MOVE –
Take care of your physical
well-being. Healthy foods
will give you strength; fat-
tening and sugar-filled foods can worsen
your depression. Exercise produces natural
stress reducers.
SHOP online if going to the mall is too
stressful.
COPING STRATEGY – Have the phone
Plan ahead for this
holiday season.
Prepare for when
times may get diffi-
cult.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life
and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 (ESV)
®
CCCELEBRATEELEBRATEELEBRATE
RRRECOVERYECOVERYECOVERY A CA CA CHRISTHRISTHRIST ---CCCENTEREDENTEREDENTERED RRRECOVERYECOVERYECOVERY PPPROGRAMROGRAMROGRAM
llleeetttttteeerrr newsnewsnews Volume VII Issue IV • Fall 2013Volume VII Issue IV • Fall 2013Volume VII Issue IV • Fall 2013
News & Announcements
4 1
WE ARE A SAFE PLACE
Celebrate Recovery is a safe place to
share your hurts, habits and hang– ups
What is said in the groups stays in the
groups!
Recovery Humor
Bell Shoals Baptist Church Friday, 6:00 pm
2102 Bell Shoals Road
Brandon, FL 33511
813-689-4229, ext. 432
Cypress Point Community
Tuesdays, 6:00 pm
15820 Morris Bridge Rd
Tampa, FL 33592
Contact: Dennis Davis
813-986-9100
Exciting Idlewild Baptist
Church
Monday, 7:00 pm
18333 Exciting Idlewild Blvd
Lutz, FL 33558
Contact : Life Discovery Ministry
813-264-8771
Generations Church
Friday, 6:00 pm
1540 Little Road
Trinity, FL 34655
Contact: Joe Plantania
727-375-8801
Harborside Church
Friday, 6:00 pm
200 Marshall St.
Safety Harbor, FL 34695
Contact: Deac Geilig
727-726-0202
Myrtle Lake Baptist Church Friday, 6:30 pm
2017 Reigler Road
Land O Lakes, FL 34639
Contact: Dawn Freijo
813-948-2081
Openwater Church
Tuesday, 7:00 pm
15612 Race Track Road
Odessa, FL 33556
Contact: Eric & Tamara Sims
813-920-9922
South Tampa Fellowship Thursday, 6:30 pm
5101 Bayshore Blvd
Tampa, FL 33611
813-251-1515
Tampa Baptist Church
Sunday, 5:00 pm
300 E. Sligh Ave.
Tampa , FL 33619
Contact: Orville & Linda Renner
813-238-5673
The Crossing Church
Monday, 6:45 pm
10130 Tuscany Ridge Dr.
Tampa, FL 33619
Contact: Gerard Coronado
813-626-0783
If you are traveling, check out
www.CelebrateRecovery.com for
locations across the country.
CELEBRATE RECOVERY LOCATIONS AND CHRIST CENTERED RECOVERY GROUPS
Some of the start times are listed for locations include dinner start time. Please call location
contact for small group start times.
continued on page 2
“The difference between boundaries and barriers is honest transparency. When we erect
a barrier with a person, it’s either because we’re afraid to be honest, tired of being honest and getting hurt, or feel like the relationship isn’t worth the hard work honesty some-
times takes. When we establish boundaries, we are brave enough to be honest but also
compassionate enough to wrap the boundary in grace by clearly communicating the pa-rameters of the relationship. Barriers set relationships on a regressive course that leads to
isolation. Boundaries set relationships on a progressive course that leads to connection.”
~ Lysa TerKeurst (Unglued, pg. 85)
ttthhhooouuuggghhhtttsss......... recovery
®
CCCELEBRATEELEBRATEELEBRATE
RRRECOVERYECOVERYECOVERY A CA CA CHRISTHRISTHRIST---CCCENTEREDENTEREDENTERED RRRECOVERYECOVERYECOVERY PPPROGRAMROGRAMROGRAM
WO
ME
N’S
FR
EE
DO
M F
RO
M A
NG
ER
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another”“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another”“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” Proverbs 27:17 Proverbs 27:17 Proverbs 27:17
We meet Monday nights:
6:15 - 7:00 p.m. Dinner ($4) 7:00 - 8:00 p.m. Large Group 8:00 - 9:00 p.m. Small Group 9:00 - 9:45 p.m. Walt’s Cafe
Idlewild Baptist Church
Life Discovery Ministry 18333 Exciting Idlewild Blvd.
Lutz, FL 33558 813.264.8771
Small Group Guidelines
1. Keep your sharing focused on your own thoughts and feelings. Limit your sharing to three to five minutes.
2. There will be NO cross talk. Cross talk is when two individuals engage in con-versation, excluding all others. Each person is free to express his or her feelings without interruptions.
3. We are here to support one another, not “fix” one another.
4. Anonymity and confidentiality are basic requirements. What is shared in the group stays in the group. The only exception is when someone threatens to in-jure themselves or others.
5. Offensive language has no place in a Christ-centered recovery group.
Accountability Team Phone Numbers
Sponsor: ___________________________________________________________
Accountability Partners:
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
My Emotions are My Own Choice
I can choose:
To be positive in my communication.
To not withhold approval, acceptance, or affection.
To not withhold my presence.
To choose equality, rather than seeking false superiority feelings or false inferiori-
ty feelings.
When the trials come, I can be assured that if God has allowed them through His love, they are designed to produce good in me. As I continue to work through my anger, I will be patient with myself, living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time. I will try not to allow guilt or discouragement to drag me lower than my anger does. God, who is the es-sence of patience, is very willing to take the necessary time to see me through my strug-
gle.
It is both healthy and necessary to feel anger and to talk about my anger. I should recognize anger as my own emotion and avoid hurting the objects of my anger keep-ing my anger as a feeling not an action. Looking at anger as a feeling may also reveal a larger hurt, habit or hang up that is hiding behind the anger. It is what I do with my feelings that will allow me to fall into sin. I need to check the motives for my behav-ior. Rudeness under the disguise of being honest is still rudeness.
There are two kinds of anger: healthy adaptive anger and unhealthy needless anger. Healthy anger is based on being protective of myself or others. Unhealthy needless anger is based on my resentment which leads to desiring revenge. Recognizing and accepting my responsibility for unhealthy needless anger is the first step towards true freedom from anger.
DAILY QUIET TIME WITH GOD: Anger causes me to live in conflict and not in peace. I will try to remember that God is in charge of my life and He loves me unconditionally. I will commit to having a daily quiet time with God.
TAKING A “TIME-OUT”: When I feel body arousal, I need to recognize that as a sign that I am getting angry. I will use a “time-out” to isolate myself from the trig-ger for my anger and to prevent the anger from becoming too intense. I will ask my-self, “What is making me angry? And “How is this trigger about me?” I will reap-praise the situation to keep my behavior under control. I will do something physical to release the adrenaline rush and energy in a healthy way, such as going for a walk or cleaning a closet. I will avoid alcohol, caffeine, or other medicating substances during “time-out.” Looking at anger as a feeling may also reveal a larger hurt, habit or hang up that is hiding behind the anger.
CONFRONTING IN LOVE: After the time-out, I will go back and deal with what made me angry. If I leave an issue unresolved, it is likely to return later. I will not use the confrontation as an opportunity to blame, shame, seek revenge, or to rationalize my anger. Examples of confronting in love while stating my feelings are: “I love you, here’s how this action makes me feel,” or “I feel devalued when this is said or done.”
WORK THE 12 STEPS AND CONNECT WITH OTHERS: I will commit to working the 12 Steps, to attend regularly the Celebrate Recovery meetings, and to getting an Accountability Partner for my anger management. (We strongly suggest each woman obtain a Celebrate Recovery Bible and the Participant’s Guides, which are the tools we use in Celebrate Recovery.)
FORGIVE: I will become willing to forgive myself and others. The Lord forgave you, so you must be willing to forgive others (Colossians 3:13b NLT). Forgiveness is NOT forgetting what has happened. Forgiveness IS changing the way I think. For-giveness IS my giving up my desire for revenge.
SELF CONTROL: Self-control is a mark of spiritual maturity, while giving into outward anger (raging), or giving the silent treatment (stuffing), denotes the exact opposite. I will ask myself before I speak:
• Is it true? • Is it kind? • Is it necessary?
The Problem
As women who struggle with anger, we may not recognize that our anger has foun-dations in other basic emotions - usually fear or pain. These basic emotions may have become damaged as adults or when we were children. Some of us may have been abused or neglected as children. Others may have lost a parent or a loved one by their death. Many of us may have been abused or cheated on by a spouse or boy-friend.
We may have learned how to express anger inappropriately from our parents, other relatives, or friends. We did not realize that when we lashed out in anger, we were ignoring our fear, pain, or another deeper hurt, habit or hang-up. Others of us did not even realize we were struggling with anger because we did not express it, but rather, we stuffed it down and kept silent.
As our lives and relationships progressed we may have become addicted to the phys-ical symptoms of anger. Some of us may have felt a momentary euphoria as the an-ger was released. Some of us did not recognize we were actually hurting our loved ones and ourselves in the process. In the heat of the moment, releasing our anger was all that mattered.
Some of us felt our anger was justified based on the object of anger’s actions, i.e., “If he hadn’t come home late from work, I wouldn’t have had to yell at him” or “If she had not talked back to me, I would not have had to slap her” or “My husband de-serves me calling him names, yelling and fighting because he cheated on me.”
Many of us feel intense shame and guilt over the actions that we have committed during our unhealthy expressions of anger. We have vowed to never act that way again, only to find ourselves back in the same situations, unable to change it under our own power. Anger has confused us and gotten the better of us time and time again.
Some of us did not understand that anger is a God given emotion and that we could use it in healthy, productive ways. Being angry meant that we were bad, somehow faulty; even that we were not Christians. We have allowed our shame and guilt to create the false belief that we could not turn to God for his comfort, strength and guidance. We did not feel worthy of His help or love. We remained stuck in using anger as a coping mechanism and to get the desired results from others.
The Solution
EVALUATE THE ANGER: Anger is one of my ten basic, God-given emotions. This emotion can be CONSTRUCTIVE or DESTRUCTIVE—depending upon my response. The focus of this group is on giving Jesus a “NANO SECOND” (just one billionth of a second!), to help me use all of my emotions according to God’s design, for my life, and to appropriately change my pattern of relating to my responsibilities and to other people.
It is both healthy and necessary to feel anger and to talk about my anger. I should recognize anger as my own emotion and avoid hurting the objects of my anger keep-ing my anger as a feeling not an action. Looking at anger as a feeling may also reveal a larger hurt, habit or hang up that is hiding behind the anger. It is what I do with my feelings that will allow me to fall into sin. I need to check the motives for my behav-ior. Rudeness under the disguise of being honest is still rudeness.
There are two kinds of anger: healthy adaptive anger and unhealthy needless anger. Healthy anger is based on being protective of myself or others. Unhealthy needless anger is based on my resentment which leads to desiring revenge. Recognizing and accepting my responsibility for unhealthy needless anger is the first step towards true freedom from anger.
DAILY QUIET TIME WITH GOD: Anger causes me to live in conflict and not in peace. I will try to remember that God is in charge of my life and He loves me unconditionally. I will commit to having a daily quiet time with God.
TAKING A “TIME-OUT”: When I feel body arousal, I need to recognize that as a sign that I am getting angry. I will use a “time-out” to isolate myself from the trig-ger for my anger and to prevent the anger from becoming too intense. I will ask my-self, “What is making me angry? And “How is this trigger about me?” I will reap-praise the situation to keep my behavior under control. I will do something physical to release the adrenaline rush and energy in a healthy way, such as going for a walk or cleaning a closet. I will avoid alcohol, caffeine, or other medicating substances during “time-out.” Looking at anger as a feeling may also reveal a larger hurt, habit or hang up that is hiding behind the anger.
CONFRONTING IN LOVE: After the time-out, I will go back and deal with what made me angry. If I leave an issue unresolved, it is likely to return later. I will not use the confrontation as an opportunity to blame, shame, seek revenge, or to rationalize my anger. Examples of confronting in love while stating my feelings are: “I love you, here’s how this action makes me feel,” or “I feel devalued when this is said or done.”
WORK THE 12 STEPS AND CONNECT WITH OTHERS: I will commit to working the 12 Steps, to attend regularly the Celebrate Recovery meetings, and to getting an Accountability Partner for my anger management. (We strongly suggest each woman obtain a Celebrate Recovery Bible and the Participant’s Guides, which are the tools we use in Celebrate Recovery.)
FORGIVE: I will become willing to forgive myself and others. The Lord forgave you, so you must be willing to forgive others (Colossians 3:13b NLT). Forgiveness is NOT forgetting what has happened. Forgiveness IS changing the way I think. For-giveness IS my giving up my desire for revenge.
SELF CONTROL: Self-control is a mark of spiritual maturity, while giving into outward anger (raging), or giving the silent treatment (stuffing), denotes the exact opposite. I will ask myself before I speak:
• Is it true? • Is it kind? • Is it necessary?
The Problem
As women who struggle with anger, we may not recognize that our anger has foun-dations in other basic emotions - usually fear or pain. These basic emotions may have become damaged as adults or when we were children. Some of us may have been abused or neglected as children. Others may have lost a parent or a loved one by their death. Many of us may have been abused or cheated on by a spouse or boy-friend.
We may have learned how to express anger inappropriately from our parents, other relatives, or friends. We did not realize that when we lashed out in anger, we were ignoring our fear, pain, or another deeper hurt, habit or hang-up. Others of us did not even realize we were struggling with anger because we did not express it, but rather, we stuffed it down and kept silent.
As our lives and relationships progressed we may have become addicted to the phys-ical symptoms of anger. Some of us may have felt a momentary euphoria as the an-ger was released. Some of us did not recognize we were actually hurting our loved ones and ourselves in the process. In the heat of the moment, releasing our anger was all that mattered.
Some of us felt our anger was justified based on the object of anger’s actions, i.e., “If he hadn’t come home late from work, I wouldn’t have had to yell at him” or “If she had not talked back to me, I would not have had to slap her” or “My husband de-serves me calling him names, yelling and fighting because he cheated on me.”
Many of us feel intense shame and guilt over the actions that we have committed during our unhealthy expressions of anger. We have vowed to never act that way again, only to find ourselves back in the same situations, unable to change it under our own power. Anger has confused us and gotten the better of us time and time again.
Some of us did not understand that anger is a God given emotion and that we could use it in healthy, productive ways. Being angry meant that we were bad, somehow faulty; even that we were not Christians. We have allowed our shame and guilt to create the false belief that we could not turn to God for his comfort, strength and guidance. We did not feel worthy of His help or love. We remained stuck in using anger as a coping mechanism and to get the desired results from others.
The Solution
EVALUATE THE ANGER: Anger is one of my ten basic, God-given emotions. This emotion can be CONSTRUCTIVE or DESTRUCTIVE—depending upon my response. The focus of this group is on giving Jesus a “NANO SECOND” (just one billionth of a second!), to help me use all of my emotions according to God’s design, for my life, and to appropriately change my pattern of relating to my responsibilities and to other people.
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“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another”“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another”“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” Proverbs 27:17 Proverbs 27:17 Proverbs 27:17
We meet Monday nights:
6:15 - 7:00 p.m. Dinner ($4) 7:00 - 8:00 p.m. Large Group 8:00 - 9:00 p.m. Small Group 9:00 - 9:45 p.m. Walt’s Cafe
Idlewild Baptist Church
Life Discovery Ministry 18333 Exciting Idlewild Blvd.
Lutz, FL 33558 813.264.8771
Small Group Guidelines
1. Keep your sharing focused on your own thoughts and feelings. Limit your sharing to three to five minutes.
2. There will be NO cross talk. Cross talk is when two individuals engage in con-versation, excluding all others. Each person is free to express his or her feelings without interruptions.
3. We are here to support one another, not “fix” one another.
4. Anonymity and confidentiality are basic requirements. What is shared in the group stays in the group. The only exception is when someone threatens to in-jure themselves or others.
5. Offensive language has no place in a Christ-centered recovery group.
Accountability Team Phone Numbers
Sponsor: ___________________________________________________________
Accountability Partners:
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
My Emotions are My Own Choice
I can choose:
To be positive in my communication.
To not withhold approval, acceptance, or affection.
To not withhold my presence.
To choose equality, rather than seeking false superiority feelings or false inferiori-
ty feelings.
When the trials come, I can be assured that if God has allowed them through His love, they are designed to produce good in me. As I continue to work through my anger, I will be patient with myself, living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time. I will try not to allow guilt or discouragement to drag me lower than my anger does. God, who is the es-sence of patience, is very willing to take the necessary time to see me through my strug-
gle.
