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6135 Winchester Road Irvine, Kentucky 40336-8517 Phone (606) 723-5012, Fax (606) 723-2743 Email: <[email protected]> Published on Wednesdays by Tracy Randall Patrick Delores L. Rowland, Editor Subscription Prices Estill $17, Adj. Counties $28, Elsewhere $32 Periodicals Postage Paid, Irvine, KY 40336 (Permit #685-890) POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: The Estill Co. Tribune, 6135 Winchester Rd. Irvine, Kentucky 40336-8517 Our 33rd Year Serving Estill County! Member of Kentucky Press Association <EstillTribune.Com> Page 4, The Estill County Tribune, November 19, 2014 Owlhead’s Grocery South Irvine * 723-7473 Pet & Livestock Feed Corn 50 Lbs Cracked Corn 50 Lbs Horse Feed 50 Lbs Rabbit Pellets 50 Lbs 40% Hog Supplement 50 Lbs Pig & Show 18% 50 Lbs Starter & Grower 25 Lbs Starter & Grower 25 Lbs Layer Pellets 50 Lbs Dog Food 50 Lbs Mineral Block 50 Lbs Salt Block 50 Lbs Fly Block Trace Mineral Salt 50 Lbs Pebble Lime 50 Lbs Defender Dog Food 50 Lbs Dry Molasses 50 Lbs Other Feeds Also Available Square or Round Baling Twines Available Owlhead’s Grocery South Irvine * Phone 723-7473 Donald & Katherine Dixon, Owners We Close at 10:00 p.m. We Sell Feeds by Producer Quit Smoking Peter, at a New Year’s party, turns to his friend, Ken, and asks for a cigarette. “I thought you made a New Year’s resolution to quit smoking,” Ken responds. “I’m in the process of quitting,” replies Peter with a grin. “Right now, I am in the middle of phase one.” “Phase one?” wonders Ken. “Yeah,” laughs Peter, “I’ve quit buying.” New Year’s Eve On New Year’s Eve, Daniel is in no shape to drive, so he sensibly leaves his van in the car park and walks home. As he is wobbling along, he is stopped by a policeman. “What are you doing out here at four o’clock in the morning?” asks the police officer. “I’m on my way to a lecture,” answers Roger. “And who on earth, in their right mind, is going to give a lecture at this time on New Year’s Eve?” inquires the constable sarcastically. “My wife,” slurred Daniel grimly. The Big Boys An elderly gentleman is walking down the street when he sees a young lad who is crying so hard that he is shak- ing. Taking compassion, the old gent bends over and pats the boy on the head, saying, “There, there. What seems to be the problem?” The young man raises his tear streaked face and blurts out, “I can’t do the things the big boys do.” So, the elderly gentleman sits down on the curb next to him and cries with him. Dead Donkey A minister awakens one morning to find a dead donkey in his front yard. He has no idea how it got there, but he knows he has to get rid of it. So, he calls the sanitation de- partment, the health department, and several other agen- cies, but no one seems able to help him. In desperation, the good reverend calls the mayor and asks what should be done. The mayor must have been having a bad day. “Why bother me?” he asks. “You’re a clergyman. It’s your job to bury the dead.” The pastor loses his cool. “Yes,” he snaps, “But I thought I should at least notify the next-of-kin.” New Kittens A three-year-old boy goes with his dad to see a new lit- ter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informs his mother, “There were two boy kittens and two girl kit- tens.” “How did you know that?” his mother asks. “Daddy picked them up and looked underneath,” he re- plies. “I think it’s printed on their bottom.” Shotgun Wedding Esmerelda stops by Ma and Pa’s house to pick them up to take them to a cousin’s wedding. Ma is holding her 12- gauge shotgun and is busy at the kitchen table putting rice into shotgun cartridges. “What are you doing, Ma?” says Esmerelda. “This is not one of those kind of weddings!” “This is for Pa,” replies Ma. “He doesn’t like weddings very well. If he makes a break for it, I’m going to sprinkle a little rice on his back side!” “I just saw Pa out back,” says Esmerelda. “He’s walking with a limp. I don’t think he could run very far. What hap- pened to his leg anyhow?” “Pa doesn’t like rehearsals very well either!” Commotion At Ma and Pa’s Pa is sleeping in his rocking chair in the living room while Ma and Esmerelda are chatting out on the front porch. Suddenly, they hear a commotion from inside the living room. Ma says, “We’d better step back.” Suddenly, the screen door flies back with a bang and what seems like a dozen cats come running out and go in all directions. “What’s that all about, Ma?” asks Esmerelda. “Well,” says Ma. “Pa passed gas and all them cats think they done it; so, they’re going off to find a place to bury.” “I’m sure glad that’s over with,” replies Esmerelda. “Step back,” says Ma. “That’s not all of it.” Suddenly, the screen door swings open again and Pa comes flying out with a broom in his hand. “He woke up and thinks the cats did it,” says Ma. Strong Scents Pa and Ma are waiting for church to start when Esmerel- da turns around and asks, “Pa, did you pass gas?” “Well,” says Pa. “I did Thursday while I was down in town, but I didn’t know you could smell it.” Estill County Toys For Tots To Begin Accepting Applications Welcome to the Toys for Tots Program. We hope this program will benefit as many people as possible this Christmas season. Participa- tion in the Toys for Tots program is as simple as completing a participation sheet. You will need to bring in the child’s birth certificate and a util- ity bill to confirm your address. The participation sheet can be picked up Wednesday - Saturday after 6 p.m. at the Ravenna Police Department. After completing the participation sheet, your child’s name will be added to the Christmas list provided they are not on any other list. The Ravenna Police Department began ac- cepting names on Saturday, November 15, 2014 and will continue through Wednesday, Decem- ber 10, 2014. No names will be accepted after the cutoff date. If you have any questions, please contact Chief Ken White of the Ravenna Police Depart- ment at 606 723-3332 after 6 p.m. Thank you, Chief Ken White Letter To The Editor ____________________________________________________________________ Thanks To Supporters of Estill Volleyball Dear Editor: We just wanted to take a minute to thank all of our 2013-2014 sponsors for the Estill Co. Volleyball Team. Their support is much appreciated. With sponsor $ we feed our girls before away games; it also helps in buying supplies the team may need. Thanks again for your support to our girls, Estill Co. Volleyball Boosters. 82 Food Mart, Abundant Life Christian Store, American Legion Post 79, American Legion Ladies Auxiliary Post 79, Bo Morris, Bunt Gross Auto, By-Pass Animal Clinic, Carhartt Inc, Admin. Office, Cash in a Dash, Classy Cuts, Cole’s Construc- tion, County Line Kennels, Cyrus Printing, Daniel & Diane Akers, Danny Newman Trucking, Debbie Rison, Delma Kirby, Dennis & Son, Rod & Customs, Donns Used Cars, EKU Upward Bound- Becca Mor- rison, El Ranchito, Elwood & Debra Patrick, Enersys, Estill Co. VFW Post 8019, Estill Co. VFW Post 8019 – Mens Auxiliary, Estill Tribune, Faye Gibson, GCH Wealth Manage- ment, Gearl Denn Puckett, Glenda Gay Oliver, CPA, Heather Combs, Comm. Atty., Home Sewn, Jennifer O. Gross, Hot Spot Tanning, Howells Food Mart, Innersys, Irvine Nursing Rehab, Jannie & Larry Wilson, Jason & Nikki Cyrus, Jeff Hix, PVA, John & Tricia Henry, Kathy Smith, Koun- try Boy Kennel, Lexington Win- nelson Co., Little Caesars, Looking Fancy, Marcums Auto Sales, Marsha Webb, Marshall Kirby, Masters Sta- ble, Meme & Pappy Judge, Michael & Anissa Hardy, Michael & Debra Cole. Also, Moonlight Body Shop, Muncy Contracting, North Broad- way Auto Sales, Old Timers Market, Old Crows Nest, Owl Head Grocery, Patrick Collision, Patrick’s Auto Sales, Perry’s Auto, Playtime Day- care, Rick Electric, River Drive Auto, Rodney Davis, Co. Atty., Roses Cash & Carry, Sandy Richardson, Save A Lot, Seab Anglin, Shelia Collins, Beautician, Sherry Fox, Co. Clerk, Smokeys Auto Garage, Sole Choice, South Irvine Food Mkt., Stephanie Brinegar, Circuit Clerk, Sunset Salon, Sweet & Savvy, Tamara Rose, CPA, The Hamiltons, The Right Place, TNT DJ Service, Triple O Electric, LLC, Twin Cedars Embroidery, Vic & Robyn Morefield, Wallace Taylor, Co. Judge Ex., Warren F Toler Fu- neral Home, and Wisemantown Pay Lake. Estill County Volleyball Boosters Thanksgiving Deadline Please submit all news articles, photos, and ads to The Estill County Tribune by noon Monday, Nov. 24, because of the Thanks- giving holiday. Email: [email protected] Phone: 723-5012 Mail: 6135 Winchester Road Irvine, KY 40336

Estill $17, Adj. Counties $28, Elsewhere $32 Periodicals ... · his mother, “There were two boy kittens and two girl kit-tens.” “How did you know that?” his mother asks. “Daddy

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6135 Winchester RoadIrvine, Kentucky 40336-8517

Phone (606) 723-5012, Fax (606) 723-2743Email: <[email protected]>

Published on Wednesdays byTracy Randall Patrick

Delores L. Rowland, EditorSubscription Prices

Estill $17, Adj. Counties $28, Elsewhere $32Periodicals Postage Paid, Irvine, KY 40336

(Permit #685-890)POSTMASTER: Send address changes to:The Estill Co. Tribune, 6135 Winchester Rd.

Irvine, Kentucky 40336-8517

Our 33rd Year Serving Estill County!

Member of Kentucky Press Association

<EstillTribune.Com>

Page 4, The Estill County Tribune, November 19, 2014

Owlhead’s GrocerySouth Irvine * 723-7473

Pet & Livestock FeedCorn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Cracked Corn . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Horse Feed . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Rabbit Pellets . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .40% Hog Supplement .50 Lbs .Pig & Show 18% . . . . .50 Lbs .Starter & Grower . . . . .25 Lbs .Starter & Grower . . . . .25 Lbs .Layer Pellets . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Dog Food . . . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Mineral Block . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Salt Block . . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Fly Block . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Trace Mineral Salt . . . .50 Lbs .Pebble Lime . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Defender Dog Food . . .50 Lbs .Dry Molasses . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Other Feeds Also Available

Square or Round Baling Twines Available

Owlhead’s GrocerySouth Irvine * Phone 723-7473Donald & Katherine Dixon, Owners

We Close at 10:00 p.m.

We Sell

Feeds by Producer

Quit Smoking Peter,ataNewYear’sparty,turnstohisfriend,Ken,andasksforacigarette. “I thoughtyoumadeaNewYear’s resolution toquitsmoking,”Kenresponds. “I’mintheprocessofquitting,”repliesPeterwithagrin.“Rightnow,Iaminthemiddleofphaseone.” “Phaseone?”wondersKen. “Yeah,”laughsPeter,“I’vequitbuying.”

New Year’s Eve OnNewYear’sEve,Danielisinnoshapetodrive,sohesensiblyleaveshisvaninthecarparkandwalkshome.Asheiswobblingalong,heisstoppedbyapoliceman. “What are you doing out here at four o’clock in themorning?”asksthepoliceofficer. “I’monmywaytoalecture,”answersRoger. “Andwhoonearth,intheirrightmind,isgoingtogivealectureatthistimeonNewYear’sEve?”inquirestheconstablesarcastically. “Mywife,”slurredDanielgrimly.

The Big Boys Anelderlygentlemaniswalkingdownthestreetwhenheseesayoungladwhoiscryingsohardthatheisshak-ing. Takingcompassion,theoldgentbendsoverandpatstheboyonthehead,saying,“There,there.Whatseemstobetheproblem?” Theyoungmanraiseshistearstreakedfaceandblurtsout,“Ican’tdothethingsthebigboysdo.” So,theelderlygentlemansitsdownonthecurbnexttohimandcrieswithhim.

Dead Donkey Aministerawakensonemorningtofindadeaddonkeyinhisfrontyard.Hehasnoideahowitgotthere,butheknowshehastogetridofit.So,hecallsthesanitationde-partment,thehealthdepartment,andseveralotheragen-cies,butnooneseemsabletohelphim.Indesperation,thegoodreverendcallsthemayorandaskswhatshouldbedone. Themayormusthavebeenhavingabadday. “Whybotherme?”heasks.“You’reaclergyman.It’syourjobtoburythedead.” Thepastorloseshiscool.“Yes,”hesnaps,“ButIthoughtIshouldatleastnotifythenext-of-kin.”

New Kittens Athree-year-oldboygoeswithhisdadtoseeanewlit-terofkittens.Onreturninghome,hebreathlesslyinformshismother,“Thereweretwoboykittensandtwogirlkit-tens.” “Howdidyouknowthat?”hismotherasks. “Daddypickedthemupandlookedunderneath,”here-plies.“Ithinkit’sprintedontheirbottom.”

Shotgun Wedding EsmereldastopsbyMaandPa’shousetopickthemuptotakethemtoacousin’swedding.Maisholdingher12-gaugeshotgunandisbusyatthekitchentableputtingriceintoshotguncartridges. “Whatareyoudoing,Ma?”saysEsmerelda.“Thisisnotoneofthosekindofweddings!” “ThisisforPa,”repliesMa.“Hedoesn’tlikeweddingsverywell.Ifhemakesabreakforit,I’mgoingtosprinklealittlericeonhisbackside!” “IjustsawPaoutback,”saysEsmerelda.“He’swalkingwithalimp.Idon’tthinkhecouldrunveryfar.Whathap-penedtohisleganyhow?” “Padoesn’tlikerehearsalsverywelleither!”

Commotion At Ma and Pa’s Pa issleeping inhis rockingchair in the livingroomwhile Ma and Esmerelda are chatting out on the frontporch.Suddenly,theyhearacommotionfrominsidethelivingroom.Masays,“We’dbetterstepback.”Suddenly,thescreendoorfliesbackwithabangandwhatseemslikeadozencatscomerunningoutandgoinalldirections. “What’sthatallabout,Ma?”asksEsmerelda. “Well,”saysMa.“Papassedgasandallthemcatsthinktheydoneit;so,they’regoingofftofindaplacetobury.” “I’msuregladthat’soverwith,”repliesEsmerelda. “Stepback,”saysMa.“That’snotallofit.” Suddenly, the screendoor swingsopenagain andPacomesflyingoutwithabroominhishand. “Hewokeupandthinksthecatsdidit,”saysMa.

Strong Scents PaandMaarewaitingforchurchtostartwhenEsmerel-daturnsaroundandasks,“Pa,didyoupassgas?” “Well,”saysPa.“IdidThursdaywhileIwasdownintown,butIdidn’tknowyoucouldsmellit.”

Estill County Toys For TotsTo Begin Accepting Applications WelcometotheToysforTotsProgram.Wehope this program will benefit as many people as possible this Christmas season. Participa-tionintheToysforTotsprogramisassimpleascompletingaparticipationsheet.Youwillneedto bring in the child’s birth certificate and a util-ity bill to confirm your address. The participation sheet can be pickedupWednesday -Saturdayafter6p.m.at theRavenna Police Department. After completingtheparticipationsheet,yourchild’snamewillbeaddedtotheChristmaslistprovidedtheyarenotonanyotherlist. TheRavennaPoliceDepartmentbeganac-ceptingnamesonSaturday,November15,2014andwillcontinuethroughWednesday,Decem-ber10,2014.Nonameswillbeacceptedafterthecutoffdate. Ifyouhaveanyquestions,pleasecontactChiefKenWhiteoftheRavennaPoliceDepart-mentat606723-3332after6p.m.

Thank you, Chief Ken White

Letter To The Editor____________________________________________________________________Thanks To Supporters of Estill Volleyball

Dear Editor: Wejustwantedtotakeaminutetothankallofour2013-2014sponsorsfor the Estill Co. Volleyball Team.Their support is much appreciated.With sponsor $ we feed our girlsbeforeawaygames; italsohelps inbuyingsuppliestheteammayneed.Thanksagainforyoursupporttoourgirls,EstillCo.VolleyballBoosters. 82 Food Mart, Abundant LifeChristian Store, American LegionPost 79, American Legion LadiesAuxiliaryPost79,BoMorris,BuntGrossAuto,By-PassAnimalClinic,CarharttInc,Admin.Office,CashinaDash,ClassyCuts,Cole’sConstruc-tion, County Line Kennels, CyrusPrinting, Daniel & Diane Akers,Danny Newman Trucking, DebbieRison,DelmaKirby,Dennis&Son,Rod&Customs,DonnsUsedCars,

EKU Upward Bound- Becca Mor-rison,ElRanchito,Elwood&DebraPatrick, Enersys, Estill Co. VFWPost8019,EstillCo.VFWPost8019– Mens Auxiliary, Estill Tribune,FayeGibson,GCHWealthManage-ment, Gearl Denn Puckett, GlendaGay Oliver, CPA, Heather Combs,Comm.Atty.,HomeSewn,JenniferO.Gross,HotSpotTanning,HowellsFoodMart,Innersys,IrvineNursingRehab,Jannie&LarryWilson,Jason&NikkiCyrus,JeffHix,PVA,John&TriciaHenry,KathySmith,Koun-try Boy Kennel, Lexington Win-nelson Co., Little Caesars, LookingFancy,MarcumsAutoSales,MarshaWebb,MarshallKirby,MastersSta-ble,Meme&PappyJudge,Michael&Anissa Hardy, Michael & DebraCole. Also, Moonlight Body Shop,

Muncy Contracting, North Broad-wayAutoSales,OldTimersMarket,OldCrowsNest,OwlHeadGrocery,Patrick Collision, Patrick’s AutoSales, Perry’s Auto, Playtime Day-care,RickElectric,RiverDriveAuto,RodneyDavis,Co.Atty.,RosesCash& Carry, Sandy Richardson, SaveALot,SeabAnglin,SheliaCollins,Beautician, Sherry Fox, Co. Clerk,SmokeysAutoGarage,SoleChoice,South Irvine Food Mkt., StephanieBrinegar,CircuitClerk,SunsetSalon,Sweet&Savvy,TamaraRose,CPA,The Hamiltons, The Right Place,TNT DJ Service,Triple O Electric,LLC,TwinCedarsEmbroidery,Vic&RobynMorefield,WallaceTaylor,Co. Judge Ex.,Warren FToler Fu-neralHome,andWisemantownPayLake.

Estill County Volleyball Boosters

Thanksgiving Deadline

Please submit all news articles, photos, and ads to The Estill

County Tribune by noon Monday, Nov. 24, because of the Thanks-

giving holiday.

Email: [email protected]: 723-5012

Mail: 6135 Winchester RoadIrvine, KY 40336