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Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

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Interpersonal Communication: Bebee, Bebee and Redmond

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Page 1: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14
Page 2: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Self Concept: Many selves Self Concept: Many selves

• Material self (you are your possessions)

• Social Self – social situations

• Spiritual self – where do you stand with your values

• How you play different roles.

Page 3: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14
Page 4: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Who is in there doing the talking?Who is in there doing the talking? Inner DialogueInner Dialogue• Who are you?Who are you?• Who is it that is asking that question?Who is it that is asking that question? Buddhist Exercise in detachment and self awareness: Buddhist Exercise in detachment and self awareness:

Take the cardboard tube from an empty roll of paper towels or toilet paper and go to a mirror and look only at your eye in the reflected

image. Ask the above questions after concentrating and relaxing for several minutes.

This can get weird, so be prepared to find yourself embarrassing your mind into silence.

Page 5: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yngg8DfmzPE&list=UUHLNwUayVbV0GS0sX7T4bgA

Page 6: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Interpersonal Communication and SelfInterpersonal Communication and Self

Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. ~Abraham Lincoln~Abraham Lincoln

https://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy

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Self-concept: Our many “selves”Self-concept: Our many “selves”

Future selves or "possible "possible selves" selves" represent

individuals' ideas of what they might become, what

they would like to become, and what they are afraid of becoming.

Page 8: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Are You a Narcissist?Are You a Narcissist?How Many Selfies Have You Posted Online?How Many Selfies Have You Posted Online?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gs-lLR5AmdI

Page 9: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Activism Orientation ScaleThe Activism Orientation Scale (AOS) assesses

individuals' propensities to engage in social action.

YESYES

Page 10: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Self image: You are in controlSelf image: You are in control

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Self esteem: Self esteem: You can change your “set point”! You can change your “set point”!

•  A person with poor self-esteem will feel the urge to put down or condescend to the person. 

•  A person with good self-esteem when faced with a person showing ignorance or confusion or trouble will try and help the person.

Page 12: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14
Page 13: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEGOTWwd14M

Rudy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VL4fEUKwdPw

Page 14: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Self-fulfilling Prophesy and the Self-fulfilling Prophesy and the Placebo EffectPlacebo Effect

www.wired.com/medtech/drugs/magazine/17-09/ff_placebo_effect

Read this article on “External Links”

Page 15: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

The The pole-vaulterpole-vaulter experiment. experiment.

In an experiment where pole vaulters were given mismarked heights that they believed were practice heights but were actually higher than their own personal

best marks, it was discovered that most of the athletes cleared those heights because they believed they could do it from past performance.

Page 16: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

““How high can fleas jump?”How high can fleas jump?”If you place a few fleas in a glass jar you can safely predict they will jump straight out again. (You see, fleas are quite capable of jumping high. Fleas are the best jumpers in the insect world. They can jump eight to ten inches high, many times their own height.) Now, if you catch them, place them in the jar again and put a lid an amazing piece of behavior reprogramming begins.

This time the fleas will learn that there is a limit to their freedom as they hit an obstacle, namely the lid, over and over. After a while you can take the lid off and you will discover to your amazement that the fleas keep jumping inside their 'prison' - just a little bit short of freedom. And, if you are not compassionate enough to tip them out, they will probably die within this 'safe space'. The fleas' ability to jump high did not change - but their willingness did. And that's what determines the difference. And this is pretty much the method of our own programming too, isn't it

Page 17: Chapter Two: Interpersonal Communication and Self Rev 9/14

Famous I.Q. ExperimentFamous I.Q. Experiment In this field experiment, all the children in a primary school were

used as subjects. Each grade, or year, was split into three streams (above average, average, and below average).

 The experimenters told the teachers at the school that they were going to administer an intelligence test that would determine which children would be academic "bloomers". These children would stand the greatest chance of becoming academically bright in the future. 20% of children in each of the 18 classes were chosen at random and labeled as bloomers. Their classroom teachers were told that these children were bloomers and therefore stood a good chance of becoming quite academic, when in fact, on average, the children would have been no different in academic ability than the rest of their classmates. After eight months the test was administered again to all of the children and the IQ gains were calculated. It was found that the children who had been labeled bloomers had significantly higher gains in IQ . The greatest gains were seen in the youngest children, grades one and two.

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Self talk:Self talk:Constructing your own realityConstructing your own reality

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Calvin Coolidge

• “Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”

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Developing your inner confidenceDeveloping your inner confidence(within a realistic self appraisal) (within a realistic self appraisal)

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Communication Starts with You:Communication Starts with You:Believe in Yourself.Believe in Yourself.

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Self Disclosure:Self Disclosure:Master this as both giver and receiver and Master this as both giver and receiver and

you will be a successful communicator!you will be a successful communicator!

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http://www.outofservice.com/bigfive/ FOR NEXT WEEK