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Why do we need to learn Interpersonal Skills ?
• We can’t get all the work done alone
• We need the help of others to complete tasks
• We are social being and live in human society
• To grow in life we must learn to deal with people
How can you skillfully manage people ?
• When you have a proper understanding of human nature & people
• When you know why people do the things they do
• When you know why and how people react under certain conditions
Understanding Human Nature and People
Recognize people for:
What they are and
Not what you think they are and
Not what you want them to be
The harsh fact – The basis of all skills
PEOPLE are primarily interested in THEMSELVES
and NOT IN YOU !!!
The harsh fact – The basis of all skills
People love to talk and listen about:
•Themselves•Their Family•Their Children•Their Job/Business•Their Health•Their Plans•Their House/Assets, etc.
How to skillfully talk to people ?
Choose the most interesting subject of the world
THEMSELVES
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How to skillfully talk to people ? Contd . . .
Substitute these words:
‘I, me, my, mine’
With
‘YOU / YOUR’
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How to skillfully talk to people ? Contd . . .
Be a Good Listener. Always encourage other people to talk about themselves
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Try asking them questions like:
“How is your family Rajiv?”“What are your future plans for your business Harish?”“How is your son doing at the medical college?”“How is your health?”“Is this your family picture?”
How to skillfully Listen to people ?
Use the SOFTEN Technique
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S – Smile
O – Open Arms
F – Forward Lean
T – Touch
E – Eye Contact
N – Nod while Listening
How to skillfully make people feel Important ?
The strongest of all desires of Humankind :
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The DESIRE to be IMPORTANT
Everybody wants to be treated as Somebody
Nobody wants to be treated as Nobody
While talking to people:
Always be Hearty in your ApprobationAnd Lavish in your Praise
How to skillfully make people feel Important ?Contd . . .
Follow these simple Tips:
1.Listen to them keenly2.Applaud and compliment them3.Use their Names and Pictures as often as possible4.Pause before you answer them5.Use their words – ‘YOU’, ‘YOUR’6.Acknowledge people who are waiting to see you7.Pay attention to everybody in a group
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How to skillfully praise people ?
Keep the 4 tips in mind:
1 – Be Generous with your praise
2 – The praise must be sincere
3 – Praise the act, not the person
4 – Make the praise specific and to the point
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How to skillfully AGREE with people ?
Follow these SIX ways to agree with people:
1 – Learn to be a naturally agreeable person2 – Tell people when you agree with them3 – Do not tell people when you disagree with them unless it is absolutely necessary4 – Admit when you are wrong5 – Refrain from arguing6 – Handle fighters properly
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How to skillfully Influence people ?
Follow these Two steps:
1 – What they want (Need / Desire)
2 – How they can get it.
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How to skillfully Convince people ?
Problem while understanding other’s view point:
• Peoples skeptical nature• Ego issues• Social & Cultural Differences• Educational Differences• Physical / Mental Barriers• State of mind
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How to skillfully Convince people ? Contd….
How to skillfully make up people’s mind ?
1 – Ask ‘Yes’ questions only Before getting the final YES answer ask various ‘yes’ questions e.g.: “You want your family to be happy, don’t you?” “You want the best value for your money, don’t you?” “Don’t you think your children need the best education?”
2 – Give people reasons to say ‘yes’ to you Reasons should be the benefit or advantages to that person after saying ‘yes’. Tell people how will they be benefitted by doing what you want them to do, not how you get benefit. e.g.: “Changing to this brand will give you more results at less cost” “This is the way how your job will be finished in half the time”
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How to skillfully Convince people ? Contd….
How to skillfully make up people’s mind ?
3 – Give people a choice between two yeses Give options that has two answers and that are yes in either case e.g.: “Do you want to start the work tomorrow or Tuesday” “Do you want to pay by Card or cash” “Which color would you prefer White or Red”
4 – Expect people to say ‘yes’ to you and let them know they are expected to say ‘yes’ STEP 1 : Expecting people to say you ‘Yes” STEP 2 : Say them that you expect a ‘Yes’
This is what is called going beyond confidence
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How to skillfully Critique people ?
The 7 rules to remember:
1 – Criticism should be made in absolute privacy
2 – Preface criticism with a kind word or compliment
3 – Make the criticism impersonal – criticize the act, not the person
4 – Supply the answer / solution
5 – Ask for co-operation, don’t demand it
6 – Criticize only once for the offence, never mention again7 – Finish the criticism with a friendly note
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How to skillfully Thank people ?
The 5 rules to remember:
1 – When you say ‘Thank You’, MEAN IT
2 – Say it clearly and distinctly
3 – Look at the people you thank
4 – Thank people by name
5 – Work at thanking people
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How to skillfully make a Good Impression ?
To a Great extent we control others’ opinions of us.Be proud of yourself of who you are and what you do
Also Remember to:1.Be Sincere2.Show Enthusiasm3.Don’t be overanxious4.Don’t try to defend yourself by running other people down5.Don’t know anybody or anything
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How to skillfully make a Talk ?
Follow these 9 rules :1 – Know what you want to say
2 – Know you audience, venue and time
3 – Make the objective of your talk clear to the audience
4 – Say it and sit down
5 – Look at the audience while you talk
6 – Talk about what the audience is interested in
7 – Don’t try to make a speech
8 – The message should be clear
9 – Summarize your talk at the climax
11 Skills
These are the 11 Skills you’ve Learned now1 – How to skillfully talk to people ?
2 – How to skillfully Listen to people ?
3 – How to skillfully make people feel Important ?
4 – How to skillfully praise people ?
5 – How to skillfully AGREE with people ?
6 – How to skillfully Influence people ?
7 – How to skillfully Convince people ?
8 – How to skillfully Critique people ?
9 – How to skillfully Thank people ?
10 – How to skillfully make a Good Impression ?
11 – How to skillfully make a Talk ?
Now you are a perfect
Skillful People Manager
