i hoict fy octtn.

Those Old-Tim* HuugA.

Won 't you Bing again thoa-* old t i m e . songsWo uu'.-d to Hii i K tctCttUor,

When luvc'rf K»\ -.:t.t dream to no was yonng,Ati'l love inspired tin* wm% wo sang,

Ilii ht daTH gOlltt IlO'.V fur' : ", IT ?

Th.y bi-iiii* nn hark to bygone yi-ars,Aualn we Ijva Umm ov.-i*.

F t r luvu .survives ti*i*jilte our fears,V. i th all iu tvoalth of j< y **n\ learn,

And I am yet your lover.

I Kot- i i i i* again those old .- ¦ ¦ij .-s,Sn Irauylit with juy a'.id FaAa-w*,

I Whiln memories lony ttittwtle.lt comoOf f i i i iid.-'wo loved m. -l i r h - n d H wi- 'v known

In Borrow and in fr *ai .n-,s.-t.

; Y.'t why s.l.oul.1 memory vt&V.e th i - past,Or»oil« mil im**k !l'**'n ]i!..ri;ii.j : ?

1 Tli.*»nn h -ok -h in t ! , . .:*. _i. .u. ,, .-> ¦ .l- .n.*- ,To t i ;. th *- lulls V,"! H :I ir . i t] A Um mine.

Their ilftil.-. i isi i i rr--:.:.- ailoi-jiinjt.

'. Tin ii ping u^ -a i i i thn .-. > U . ;i ¦**« sung,Tbity l i n k '- u r U r m n^ . ihur :

Sn hroln-n eUtmla lm* li. -'.- <Ie.-;i:.e ,: l iut (droli*!, like te t idi i '.r. to thu vino,

1 ha t death alonu cm t . v . r.

iiomancc mtir iiealifn .l% -b' *

T...1 un . '. h-tv.*fa* Hit.\ ivi tli jot-black hailr . i i ' . l . i t Hi** Illicit id' tier head, and deepfVt s wh. !*.- tin* li .i/e 'i sii.i 1 "s wt ro soft andl imj i id ns won llmnl w- ¦!! i, M;m-ia Dane liadp.- Hi t i j . - i ii . -v. -r I. . .!;•"! i,. -i I . -v . - ly as iu herli i ' i t i n i i n ^ di't-M, Sin 1 sat . her head leaningou mi. ' hand , an-1 t i n ; nihf-jr hoblittg an oponIi - t t . r 11 letter f--r which she had wiftchedand wait.! i fur days.

" A-i fur support ing yciuvsvlf," wrote herfar-away cousin. Mil*M Stanley, " i t i.s per-h:i j>s the best t i l ing ymi caii do. Of courseyou can 't expect any ouo to support yon. Ishould bo happy to hel p you if I could , butmy money is all tied up ; nnd , after all , Idon 't see tha t 1 am under any particularobli gations to you."

And th is was the result of her carefullystudied and tearfull y writ ten application tolier onl y l iv ing re la t ive ! Her lip curled ,lier eyes tilled wi th indi gnant tears .

" I am ri ghtly serve.1," R.iid Mama, toherself. " I ought tc have relied ou myselfalone."

liut what was she. tc do— she , poor child ,who had been brought up Hko tho lilies,which toil nut , neither do they spin ? Inher soro e \ t r e in i ty Marcia almost envied thestout Irish girl , who brought up i* hod ofcoal as if it had been a lace pocket handker-chief.

" Them lVvkumta has moved -awayagain ," said Bidd y, incideutally, as sheStopped to take breath ; "nud old Mr.Laeey and his wife ii iuquir in ' for lodgiu 'iall around the neighborhood. "

Marcia looked up suddenly." Thia honse is six times as largo as wo

want , llrid get - wh y c-nldu't they comohere ;-"'¦ Would wo bo at titer lettin ' lod gin's,

mis* '*¦"

" t 'i - i t a in l y ; wh y nut ? We must live,Bridget , and we must pay the rent of thohouse , wh ich is on our hands for the rest oftin* year."

" And that 's thrue , miss," said Biddy.So the red-handed Phillis wafered on to.

the front door a nonce neatly written icMurcia 's delicate Italian hand , " Lodging!to Let ," and her nrwUn-rutic acquaintances,seeing the sli p of paper , gathered up theirsilken skirts and , like tho priest and thaLevite, passed by on tho other Bide.

Hut lodgers, liko moot other things thatuni1 particularly needs, wero slow to coma,and Mareia's heart beM joy fully ono nightwhen the faithful Brid get ushered in a littledried-up old man, with a carpet-bag in on*hand.

'¦¦ He wants a lod gin\ miss," criedUrid .yt .

"liut I waut Ixv.rd, too," said tho littleold man.

Marcia looked doubtful." I do not know whether I should bo

capable, of suiting you , sir , iu tiiat latter re-spect ," she said , hesitatingly. " I havoDover had anv boarders."

" Whoever lodge,---, me must board mo,too,'1 said the old man. "I can't ho run-ning back and forth to restaurants. Eggsaud bacon for broakfast, a bit of mast oibroil for dinner , a cup of tea nud a stri p oltoast at night. I'm easily suited . I sha'u'tfind fault with your terms, if I can get aijuiot , comfortable home."

" I wi l l try . sir ," salt] Marcia , courag-eously. " Which room would you pre-fer >""

" Second story back ," said tho old gen-tleman, " and possession given at once."

** l\ir," thought thia aly bargainer , ** TOtiud out whether shu's a neat housekeeperby giving her no time to rako out dust-holeiand scrub floors. "

But the second story back room was aineat as a fairy's bower, with its white daintycurtains aud chintz-covered furniture, andnot a grain of dust could tha old gentlemanfind , even though he put on hia spectaclesand sought persistently.

M ARCH LIANE 'S INUKPENDENGE .

" Looks well , quoth tlio old gentlemanto himself ; " but looks aren't everything."

Tho aaxt morning, before sho had anyidea that her strange tenant was up, MarciaDane was surprised to hear his voice in thoKitchen, close to her elbow, as sho boutover the clear broiling firo in tho range.

"Hey ? 'What ! Cooking my baconyourself ?**

Marciu looked up, with a faco flushedboth by the heat of tho firo and tho embar-var.snu'Ut of her position.

" Yes, sir ," she /altered. "I thought 1could, perhaps, do it better than Brid get,who is by no means a professional cook."

I thought you fashionable youuj? ladieswere ti-to delicate, io do auy such thing,"ftaid the old gentleman.

" Hut I am not a fashionable younglady." said Marcia , smiling, as she turnedthe slice of juicy bacon aud mado ready ashining stewpau for tho boiling of two new.Uid eggs.

Tho old gentleman rubbed his nose andwent up stairs again.

" I like tho looks of things," said ho tohis razor , as ho opened his dressing-case,,preparatory to tho operation of shaving.

More lodgers came, and moro boarders,md Marcia found herself as l .u-j ... . *,-.*¦.*frith tho various household cures which de-volved upon hor shoulders. .A contrast,th is , to (he days iu which her hardest laborwas half an hour's practice on tho guitar , ort stri p of floss-silk embroidery.

" Hut I really t h i n k I am happier than 1was in those days," said sho when , weariedout at night , she aat down to snatch the li rstlepose Mho hail been able to gain siueo thiduwu of the morning. " There's a greaideal iu not having time to lament over oii'-'naiisfiirtunes. "

" Vou are overworking yourself ," said tholit t le old man ouo day, when he saw hercome in from a brisk walk to market.

Mareia shook her head , smiling." Bat I say you are," said ho, for sho had

a comical dislike to bciug contradicted.u Do you think I haven't any eyes or carsof my own ? What's tho uso of making aslave of yourself V

" I must ," said Marcia , quietl y. " If Idid not work I could not live."

*'* Aro you dependent ou tho proceeds olyour own labor j**'

" Ves , air,"" No relative.-*-., oh?" ho questioned , with

that odd curiosity about other people'saffairs which seemed a part of his nature attimes.

" Nona that I can expect to trouble themselves about, mo."

" I thoug ht old Miles Stanley was a conBin of yours," pursued ho.

" So hn is."" And don t do anything for 3*011 ?" No—not anything," Mureia answered,

toloring a little.

"Cross old curmud geon, eh ;" hazardedthe meddlesome old gentleman.

" I havo no right to expect any help fromliim ," Marcia answered , spiritedly. " lieis no very near relative , and ho has himselfto care for. "

•• Humph!" was tho only reply. "I tseems to nie you ore very independent."

Marcia smiled." I try to bo , sir ," alio said , " but I don't

know how long I can maintain my iud**-**-peii'lence."

She spoko j estingly, but sho did not knowhow ii";'.;* to tha truth her worth, came. As.oug iis hea l th aud strength were vouch,jnfed her , sho did very well ; but sho fellill presentl y, and the lodgers, ono by one,dropped away.

All save the little old gentleman ; ho re-mained steadfast at his post.

Ho came into her sitting-room ono morn-ing ns she lay, list leas aud despondent, orthe sofa-

" Here's a note tho postman has justDrought*" he said , giving her a folded slipof paper.

She opened it with alow , languid fingers ;it was a bill.

• ' Well ," said the old gentleman , watch-ing the tears steal slowly down her cheekand drop upon her slender, wasted hands,•• what s the matter now ?

"Nothing, " said Marcia , " only tho manivnnts immediate payment , and I have noaioney."

*• The grasping Jew !" cried tho old gen-tlemnn.

" No ," said "Marcia , her quick sense ofjustice coming uppermost , " it his money,md he has a perfect ri ght to it; only, youieo, I don 't myself know where to look forit."

The old gentleman pulled out a plethoric-looking leather pocket-book.

" I'll pay the bill ," said ho." Indeed you shall not ," said Maivia , hei

pale checks sullused by a momentary color." Why should you pay my debts ?"

" Y.'h y .should I ?" repeated he , lookingat her with a peculiar aud not unkindlyuni!.-.

" les." Because I'm your cousin ," ho said ,

bouncing out of Ins chair , as if it wore a•udden relief to spunk tho sentence.

" You ! My cousin !"" Yes , I'm old Miles Stanley, tho cur-

mud geon , tho screw, the grinding oldmiser ; aud you're tho dearest little girl inall the world , and tho mosl independent.liut it's all rigbt now ; you shall come homowith me, and we'll lot this kind of life boforgotten. Wh y didn 't I say so beforo?"answering her e truest eyes, more than anyword she had spoken. "Because I hod anotion I should liko to seo what sort of stuffyon wore made of. If yoa had turned outa missish, idle young lady, whining atProvidence and grumbling at your rela-tions , do you think I should ever have toldyou who I was ? Not by a long chalk. But ,thank goodness, you're jnst the girl I wautto bo my adopted child and make my lonelyhomo bright. So tho sooner you put up a" To Let " on the front of the house, thobetter.

Ue was as good as his word ; and MarciaDane is now the cherished darling of theodd, eccentric old man. with Bridget O'Neilfor hor lieutenant—HeUn Forrett Grats*.

JAUPHLY'S RECEIPT.

"Ill t\t 8|0rl& fbcr."

t.E THINKS A DISH OF HERBS BET-TER THAN A STALL-FED OX.

At tho Dinner Table In 11 Cranky Humor—Carrots and Caper Sauce—Mr.

Jarplily Expresses Hit sat-J.s fu« t Ion#-TI i e Cost.

[ritlsburjT Chronie!e-Tele™rapli-l"Martha," tastily remarked Mr. Jarphly,

"why iu thunder can't you do tilings nice,like other ivomon''' Mr. Jarphly wits *»onlodnt t h u d i n i u r table iu H very cranky humor.Ho had had a hot discus-don with a manupon civil-service re form , and tho man toldhim ho know nothing uhout tha matter, andcalled him a "galoot. " Not only had hocalled Mr. Jarphly a "galoot ," hut ho hadadded injury to insult by citing facts andfi gures to prove it. Ho was a biggor manthan Mr. Jarphly, so tho latter hud bottledup his wrath and brought it homo for Inswife.

Somo men havo that habit.'"Why can 't you get up appetizing dishes

liko other women/" e' .ntinuud lhe iiisgu-todeivil-servico reformer.

"Why, l ean , Jereiinuh ," quietly remarkedMrs. Jarphly, WIHTKO complacency was notto bo disturbed by any eh u J I i t i u t of temperon tho part of the nil, inner, for tho lady laidthat mnruiug spout three In airs in engineer-ing a dilnpidat.j d p< .lunaiso into a basque tomatch a dark ovcrskirt ; and having, by theo-siistuueo of much pursing of li ps undLending of eyebrows, and navigating ofscij isors-puints in get nietrical lines over herknees, accompli-died tho feat, felt a placidequanimity known to nil true women whuhave conquered t% dilapidated poloualse.

"No, you don't ," simpped Mr. Jarphly."You spend money enough for things, butyou ain't got the* knuw ttowl" *

Mrs. Jarphly smilol , and Mr. Jarphl ywondered If ho Could I arrow money enoughto take him to Alaska,

"There's Mrs. Piough git," ho continued."Why can't you Clink like her? I went b ;dinner tho other day with 1'loughgit, andwhat do you suppose they hud i1"

"Whatr"Thoy had lots of th ings , but what took

my eye was some carrots I My, but theywero delicious. 1 didn 't eat anything also—nothing but just thoao carrot-d They 'd Leonsliced and fried , nnd .Mi'***. Ploug hgit hadthem fixed out wit h :t whi te MHICO with somesort of sour things ia i t—u , what do youcall 'omf "

"Capers?" Fugg este.l Mrs. Jarphly."Yes, capers. I toll you, but it wusan 1m-

.-r^n'-*.-!'* di li."' .-.i *. . Ploughgit mebbo can afford KUC IJ

;.. .nigs ," quietly remarked Mrs. Jarphly."AdY-rdi1" cried Jarphly indention. "Why,

1 asked her , and what do you th ink it costf"Mow much?""Two cents!" fairly yelled Jarphly. "Yes'm ,

2 centsl That's what it costs Mrs. I'lou;!!--**;!to get up a dish fit to set beforo a k i n -f l Sheused two big carrots, and thoy cost her just 1cent apiece in tho market, sho told me. Now,why can't you do something liko thatt*

Mra. Jarphly opened her lipi to mako a roply, bnt liko n sensible woman closed thon.again, and allowed Mr. Jarphly to enjoy hiiill humor.

At dinner next dny Mr. darphly found adish of fried carro ts done up with saueo iu nstylo that boat Mrs. I'Joughgit'c all hollow.

"Well, I declare, Martha," he exclaimed,"you do know noma thing, Thono aro splen-did."

Mrs. Jarphly srnilel.Mr. Jarphly vi-jonm-dy applied himself tc

tho dish. "Now just look how well wo canlivo on a littlo expenti turo if we can onlyhavo the know how," tie remark-ad with tifeeling of self-laudation, for having impreg-nated Mrs. Jarpbly 's mind with a notion oldressed carrots. "That's as good as roastbeef to mo any day, nr spring chickeneither," said he. ''and if you'd only use a lit-tlo skill nud brains you ct uld easily saveenough out of tho table money to buy your-self a spring silk every year. "

"Not on carrot-;," quietly ren'.i'.rkj J Mrs.Jarphly.

"What!" exclaimed her husband."Not on CUJTO I S. Jeremiah. I'd just ftp

lief , so fur n-t expense goes, p ivo you springchfekon or roast turkey, for t h a t matter."

"Why, Martha, you must be cra/.y!" criudMr. Jarphly.

"Not at all ," placidly responded Mrs,Jarphly. "You wanted enrrots dono uplike Mrs. Tlotig hgi fs and I did 'em for you.They eoit about li ..hidings. ''

"Go away."'"Fact," coolly replied M tv. Jarphly."How in thunder do you make that out.**""Carrots , 2 cents. Half a pound of butter

to fry them brown iu , 16 cents. Quart ofmilk for sauce, S cents. Two eggs to breakin tho sauce, 5 cents. Bottle of capers, 4dcents. Half a teaspoon ful of Liebig's togive a piquant to tho sauce llavor, DU cents asmall jar. Of course "

"Oli , shut up!""Jeremiah, tho iK'xt t i m o you discover a

dish I uui save up a spring silk on justbring it around , won 'c you?" nnd Mr^.Jarphly smiled a smile of triumph.

Ilovr Vet Voe* Am Cnred vmr \Vheu I|Uj tired Or lmll-*i;.,t,,€(j

"My pmefice is confined altogether todogs," said Dr. Fisohel of East Fifty-secondstreet , this morning. " I find them far moraprofitable patients than human beings. Ihave been w bu«y for the last week that Ihavo not had timo to remove my clothes.There is a great deal of sielmess amongpoodles jus t nt present , which I attribute toBO much damp weather. I have mado threocalls since midnight."

" Is it possible that you receive calls dur-ing tho night just liko a legitimate physi-cian ?"

" My friend I objoct to that word leg iti-mate, as it is as much as to say I am illeg it-imate. I contend that it required as muchskill to successfull y troa't dogs as peop le.The lives of some of my cauine patients aroconsidered more precious by the ownersthan those of many men aud women. Butto answer your question. Now , for instance,early this morning I received a call to go tob Fifth avenue residence. A poodle belong-ing to tho young lady was taken suddenlyUl , und I had to remain with it severalhours. Thn sweet girl who owned the dogwatched over it with tho tenderness that amother does over her child. Whenever thedog moaned with pain its pretty owuoiwould bo moved to tears. Wh y, she lovesthat poodlo as dearly as she dooj her littlebrother. I promised to call at noon againto seo how tho animal was gutting along. Ihavo witnessed somo very sad scenes overthe death of a patient Tho amount of af-fection some ladies show to thoir caninepets is reall y surprising. Nothing provesthat better than the liberal way they payme for my services. Of course nil my pa-tients aro in comfortable circumstances andthey can niTord it. I never make a call foiless than $"», nnd I invariabl y get tho caskdown. I have no trouble making collec-tions.

" My main hold is in surgory, and it isaurprisiug how much thoro is to do. Dogsare always suffering from some injury totheir limbs and aro constantl y gettingwounded by engaging in angry disputeswith casual acquaintances ou the thorough,fares. Big brutes or ill-natured cats are al-ways picking up quarrels with sweet li t t lepoodles. I used to bo a butcher , so thatwhat I did uot learn about anatomy while en-gaged in tho manufacture of sausage is notworth knowing, I also have one of thfrooms of my house converted into a hos-pi tal , and I have a nnmber of dogs there.Somo fathers and husbands consider it non-sense to make sueh a fuss about dogs, andthoy even object to my visiting thoir houses.Iu instances like that the dogs aro sent tomy hospital. By tho way, como into theroom and I will show you throug h it."

TUP. reporter accepted S invitation andwas shown into a la*) °<^fe which wasfitted up similar to thff^ -HBVhe ave rag*hospitals. Thoro were V^' ras or boxescontaining nice clean straw, aud about hallof them were occup ied. Tho matron wastho doctor's wifo and she was engaged ingiving a poodlo a tableapoouful of a darkliquid , while au eldcrJ-y -lady, elegantlydressed , looked on and repeated , "PoorAlgoonis, tako your medioiuo liko a sweetlittlo fft l low. "

" Ihat patient ," whispered tho doctor tothe leporter , " has boon made sick by toomuch candy. 1 have ordered port wine andginger for him. Ho ouly needs good nuru-ing and tho plainest of food , well cooked.Ho is nearly well, hut if I send him homethe lady mi ght let him oat pastry, whichwould cause a relapse."

"Now , hero ," said tho physician , open-tag another door , " is tho bathroom. I.verymorning, while the dotjs are here, they gela Turkihh bath. The rubbing is just asbeneficial for a dog as a m.iu. "

In the front room of the basement pre-parations were being made to turn it intcan undertaker 's establishment. There werealready a number of handsome eofliiiH. The•Mskt-ds are f.whioned in sueh a way that thedeeeiLsed canine is p laced iu a standing pos-ture. A dead black aud tan was being plac-ed in a coffin. It had just been embalmed ,and except for tho lack of lustre in tho eyesit did not look us if dead .

" This undertaking business is to be car-ried on by my brother-in-law." said the doc-tor , " and 1 think we will find it profitable.It has ouly been running two weeks but wehave had five funerals already. One of themwas a grand affair. It took placo from theresidence of tho owner of the dead dog, onLexingtou avenue. Tho remains wero in-terred in tho back yard with aU tho pompthat attends tho laying away of a million-aire Senator. A yonng lover of tho daugh-ter of the lady who owned the dog read thefuneral services."—Neva Tork Telegram.

HELP FOR THE CANINE S,

How Two Wagon Trains I*tt*t*i on tho SamoTrack Out West.

[Chicago Herald "Train Talk."!"Did you over see two trains pass each

other on tho same track V inquired a passen-ger " from tho west of tho brakeman. Thatlordly official looked up contemptuously,grabbed another npplo from the train-boy'sbasket, and deigi ed never a word in re-sponse.

"Oh, you nee*;!n't turn up your nose," saidtho passenger from tlio -west; "thoro havobeen lots of thing dono with trains that younever heard of. You fellows that sit downhere and bob over tho same hundred miles oftrack dny after day aud year after year cau'ttie expected to know much anyhow. Nowlisten whilo 1 tell you how wo pass twotrains on the same track out west. I was onu mulo train onco going up to a miningcamp. "Wo wero circling about a mountainwhen wo met another train coming down.Tho rond was just n bit of lodge in thomountain side, and was plenty wide for onewagon, but not quite wi lo enough for two.

"I was as green as yon aro , nud couldn'tsoo how we was to get out of tho scrape.But tho mule-whackers knew just what todo, aud lost no timo doing iL Thoy got outthoir pine blocks, pulled tho head wagonsclose together, set thu brakes on ono an t putblocks under the wheels of tho other. Thonthey started Iho nudj , up and pulled thohubs of ono wagon right over tho hubs ofthe otlier. Tho inside wagon was tight agintho rocks, while tho tires of tho outsidewhoots en t'other one were within half aninch of the eilgo of the precipice.

"It did my heart good to see those mulesj ull, Tl.o whole six of 'em would squat al i t t l e , t ig hte n them-^elvos in thoir collar3,andpull gently, .--teadily togethor —stead ier norsix men Conld of dono it Wh y, those mulesknew just what they were doing, and theyknew just us well as any body that if theygave a jerk nnd sli pped a wheel ovor theodge the w hole concern, mules and all ,would he 2,000 feet down tho gorge. Huhafter h u b and wagon after wagou tho workwent on , und that's the way wo pass twotrains on the same track out west"

THE PROBLEM SOLVED.yaciia, Vata-alM uid Conceits Picked Froo

Hero and There.

The -sholera has cost a loss in the Italianrevenue of $8,000,000 and in the Spanishrevenues of $4,625,000. It is an „. gn-ivavisitation. *~ '

Tho bread now baked at Naples * -f pre-cisely the samo shape as tho loaYf>% ciud atPompeii that wero put in the o>- 2,000years ago.

In 1834 there were seventy-eight miles ofrailway on which the mails were carried.In June, 18S4, tho number had increased to117,100.

Statistics of tho cattle industry show theexistence of 23,000,000 head in States westof tho Mississippi River, a gain of 60 p"-rcent, since 1880.

The population of tho United States in-creases at the rate of 32 per c»*it. every tenyears. At this rate there will bo 88,000,000inhabitants in 1900.

The French military establishment nowhas a regular system of carrier pigeons,eoveVug tho whole country. The longestflight will be about fifty-four miles,

Tho title "Your Honor ," applied toAmerican judges, has beon adopted in Eng-land in acoordanco to a royal proclamationas applied to country jud ges who hithertowore neither lordships or worships.

Extensive as our pnblic school system is,it is far from including all tho children intho United States. Out of a school popula-tion of 16,000,000 thoro aro not more than10,000,000 who aro now receiving an edu-cation.

The degradation of women in London isWtouishing. Seven thousand of tho 17,000arrests made in tho groat city for drunken-ness during this year were of women. Oftenthere are more women than men beforo thePolice Magistrates on this charge.

A correspondent of the London Lancetlays that owing to the difficulty of obtoiu-ing human skin to graft over granulatingwounds, he is using tho skin of frogs withgreat success. Frog skin retains its vitalityfor a long time, and can bo carried tu adistant patient by the surgeon, in his pocket.

Paresis, a giving away of the spinal nerv-ous power, and finall y of the brain , is nowthe fashionable complaint among peoplewho live iu a whirl. The person attackedbos a constant desire to put his hands in hispockets, and tho action is explained on thoground that ho is unconsciously giviug sup-port to failing spinal integrity.

A remarkable cavern has -"ust been dis-covered on Cheat liiver, near Kingwood ,W. Va. •*¦ "ery small aperture loads to aaeries of ¦¦revon chambers, tho smallest ofwhich is seventy-five feet long by forty feetbroad and thirty feet high. Tli air forma-tion is rock crystal , and exceeding ly beau-tiful , and tha explorers believe they willrival in grandeur the celebrated Luray cav-irns.

Wilber F. Storey, lato editor of the Chi-cago Timet , just after Greeley 's defeat in1872, wrote a stinging editorial. Ho aub-leqaoatly, by special invitation , attended alargo meeting, where that editorial was de-nounced for hours. He sat it out , utteringnot a word, and only saying ns he left ;" Gontlomeu , I thought I owned the Timtn.\ -think so still. Good night , gentlemen/

The population of Nevada ia steadilydwindling. Tho Carson Tribune estimate!that thero are now not more than 12,00Cvoters in tho State. In lfiSO the total vot-swas 1C,G11. Onl y oue county has 3.00Crotors, and of all the others oul y ..hreo haveft voting population iu excess of 1,000 each.One county is credited with 200 voter? only,and thero are five counties whoso combinedvote will not exceed 2-.500.

Rome thirty young farmers and businepimen of Arizona have sent one of their num.ber East to find wivt's for them. The agentBays : "I have the photograp hs of themembers, and I also have letters of recom-mendation from the township officers. AUI want now is to secure tho young ladies.Their expense, to Arizona will bo paid bytha Association immediately, or, if thoyprefer , they will bo given tho addresses oithe members whom they prefer , and a ca*rcspondence can ho opened."

ITEMS OV INTEREST. Q$U9 Jisbom auil ||in&A table of interest—The dinner table.There is nothing to equal Ayer's Sarsa-parilla for purifying the blood, and as a siirUitimedicine. H

Lost at C—The hoarse soprano 's notes.Hall's Vegetable Sicilian Hair Reuewer

heals every disease peculi.ir to the vcalp . andKeeps the scal p eool aud clean.The fashionable fall flower is the bananapeel."I have no Appet i te ,'* complains many

a ^ifim'r Hood s Narsapurilla Bivt**s an aitpetite, and enables the stomach lo perform its

Tho vice which never sticks to votingpeople—Advice.

"For nearl y a whole yrur I was .inInvalid , a living . i«iweri*-ss siiiijcci «.f t lit » mustdreadful o f a l l diseases ' kidm-v complaint ' Lcommenced tak i i m H U N T 'S [Kidm-v and Llvrr]liK.MF.ov and hegun to improve, used eight hot-ties and to-dav vt insider invsclt as well asever."— AMit s. L, \V. t' LAitK ,' lo-.* .Main streetHartford. Conn.

i h e difference between a Unto playerand a bartender is t ha t one hluws the notes andthe other knows the bloats.

I tnKPMATIsM , GofT A N D N E C I I A L CI A. —It is scienti lh-al ly selth-d t ha t r l i e i iu i a i i -.ni . padami neuralgia cannot he cured bv n i b b i n g w i t hoils. ointments, liniments, lotions, etc .; i , - r t h ereason t h a t these diseases arc rauMit l > \ ur icacid in t h e blond. The i .ulv preparation Y . h i i - huniformly expels I b i s aeid h Parker'-*. TunicSubdues pain al niice . Try i i . - iuM -.it;

A camel wi l l w m k seven or eieht dawswithout drinking. Iti t ins h, - Uittiis from sumomen . w h o drink sewn or ei-h| d a \ s u i i l u u i iw o r k i t i L'.

A tT.KAK\ (m K. - -Mr .{'haHfs T. Kr. l.s,:3J Mad 1 .son nvetHte. r.a.inii . .n-. Maryland. \\ . - l lk n o w n in UnnLfttg cireh-s . certifies to the excel-lence ill the Hiii Mar Cou^b Cure. .-•» few dosi -,speedily cured his uieei- of severe hoarsenessand sore throat. 11 is pleasant to t a k e . Noonecan lie poisoned bv l l i i s remedv. wliieh i-* freefrom opium , morphia a n d other daiigcroiHdru^s.

Boston Lady (referring to A wcll-ktunyt.authoress t- -Yes, I am an anient admirer of Mrs,P..'s stories. The 1 A I ( . | -T I I S si i t l i t K M u t-aitteupon h e r a i a verv carlv j ige. eineimtali l .a<lv(shocked . Is ii p . i s s ih i - - : j wonder she f i n dhave wr i t t en a i iv lh ing w i t h such a dreadful a t *Mict ion.

The use o f Iodoform or mercurials inthe treatment of catarrh w h e t h e r in the formof suppositories or o i n t m e n t s should be avoid.ed, as they tire bell i Injurious and ihuigeroti**.Iodoform is easil y detected by itsurtclish lor.I he only reliable catarrh remedy nil lhe marketto-dav is Klv 's Cream Halm , bein- free from allpoisonous drugs. It has cured thousands ufacute and chronic cases , where all oi l ier reme-dies have tailed. A particle is applied into eachnost r i l ; uo pa in ; agreeable to use . Price f i f t ycents nf druggists* -jusi:. '

.Mistress (to servant who has spilled thecontents of her ink bott le on the carpet >:¦* Mercy, Mary! what have you dnm*.' Vnu *vedone a pre t ty piece of work, haven 't \1.11v "Mary : " Ye niav well say that . .Missus I l towtl ,fnr didn 't I pay twiiity-frnve cents for (bat sameink this alteriuiuu? "

Anvicv. TO -MOTHERS,—Are you dis-turbed at night aad broken of your rest by a sickchild suffering and prying with pain ot eat tin?!teeth? H so. send at once and get a bottle ofMlt.s. "WINSLOWS S O O T I l l N t . SYUl'I' KOKCI1ILDRKN T K K T I I I . M;. I t s v a l u e i< Incalcu-lable. It wil l relieve the poor l i t t l e sulb reie unmediately, liepeim upon ji . l u u t h c rs . t h e n * isno mis take about it . I t cures dvs i n te ry amidiarrluea, regulates the stomach and ho-wi*.-*,cures wind colic , sof tens the uu m s , reduces 111-l l a m i u a t i o u . and jrht s tone and rncrg v hi t h ewhole svstcrn . Mus. WINSbt lW'SSOoTIIINtJSYlUT' roU ( T l l l . I H t K N TEKTIIIM. is pleas-an t to the ta.ste , and is the prescr ipt ion of one olt l te oldest and best f e m a l e nurses ami p-hvsle-ians in tbe I'n i l c t l States, ami Is for sale by alldruggists th roughou t the world. Price 25 cciiUa buttle.

" We will suppose that tho husband Ubringing the suit. His lawyer immediatel yBtrik»fi him for a §-50 bill. This is beforoanything is done. No money, no divorce.Then as .soon as the papers have been servedon the wife her lawyer app lies to court fora rule compelling the husband to pay liim$50, too. Tho court accedes to this as amatter of course, and tho rule is alwaysmado absolute. By this t imo tho proceed-ing:-, have cost tho libelant $100. Formerlythe legal foe on each side wan $35, and hocould have got thus far for $70 ; but , t h a n kHeaven , under the new rules tho price hnsbeen raised. Then the court appoints amaster or examiner to tako testimony. Hohears all tho witnesses aud gets at the facts.His feo U $25 for the first meeting and $10a meeting after that. Two or threo mel t-ings usually suffice. I forgot to say thatbefore this the Sheriff had had his di g at thrlitigants in tho shape of a $3 fee f o r K e r v i njthe papers on the respondent. Then , whentho decree iu made, tlio libellaut pays $10for it and tho whole thing is made a mat terof record by the prothonotary, who, forthat littlo b^rvice , gets $5. This makes$1-10, provided that the master has but onehearing. Two would usually be necessary,and this makes tho grand total of $153.

" How about contested divorces , youask?" " Ah ," said tho lawyer, rubbing hishands with glee and putting ou hi.s bestsmile, " now you strike a rich vein. Un-fortunately for us, the majority of divorceaaro not contested, as both sides are only toowilling to got clear of each other. lint agood contested caso that involves a jurytrial of several days, and perhaps a week ortwo, will run thn husband , perhaps, into at\ few thousand dollara."— PliiUuSelp .iaPrea.

THE PRICE OP DIVORCES.

\Altered for Mailing at Secol¦~ 1,

S IGNA L ADVERTSSPACE. IW. SW.JJW. l_M~3_Mj f t .V

13 Words.. $ .25 $ .35 $ .« $ .5e $ .75 T^«T>.t06SS Wordi.. .25 .88 .50 .65 125 173 *vXK Inch ... .50 .75 1.00 125 200 BOO 5* inl loch.... 1.00 1.50 2 0 0 25« 4 00 U 00 10003 Inches.. 1.75 2 63 350 4 1*0 R (*0 13.(jo an no3 lDCheB.. 2.50 3 75 5.00 000 12.00 1800 SO.'io4 Inches.. S.SS -18fV 6 50 SOO 10.10 .M 00 40 HO5Inches.. 4.00 fl .00! 8.00 1000 20.00 »>0fl M m6 Inches.. 4.50 A 7A! 0 00 13.00 *l 00 .SS.00 00 mlSIncheB.. 8.00 12.00 lfi.00 30.00 SiM W W Wen

2ti Inches.. 14 50 81 75 29 ft) gg B5 104.00 moo' onhPLLIAh OK "HEADING" NOTICEs~

l *T~inlarpj or *maM vype, double the above rates Cutsand Heavily Displayed Matter inserted only on 4thpace, and charged for according to space orcuulnd"FAMILY RECORD" Items published Tree _Remarks, Ac/10 cents per line.DISCOUNTS ON ADVANCE PAYMENTS -On orders of IIO.OJ, 10 per cent.: on $25.00.15 n.rcent.; ou 150 Oft 80 per wnt.; on $IOo3o ir ovc r25 per cent. To iecore discounts, njmcof mustbe made at the time of ordering Faj""-0' mu91YfiAltLY ADVERTIS ING payable qnsrtorl-/wben charged (o parties of known TCSpotm.bmtvOtherwise payable In advanceTil K Sil'7?**inliecf.t0 tlrnfl flflrr M dfl > 8

-«; -IS J?IONA h MV IIIK a larger rf icntat ion thanany other weekly paper an Long Island tl trooklyiaa\8itfslD£ medium

DILLON'SClearing Sale

—o:' -

WINTE RCOODS.t'-v'. i-i 'i"* : 1 t :X!:r^ our tumual hiveulnrv v-.v

¦ . >. .- | \ it .-- . i n - ' r !- ..li |oe,o-*e iilll l iUl-eUlm--i,.' -k 01 -. : i i ' * 'i * .: 1- . and wil l ¦ >lT* r e\ ira.-nli-nun bargain-, in ¦"..!¦;, depariniei-i. during I lie|]i-\ l I v. - :,; > 1 l.i-;. -:

NOTE THE ! FOLLOWI20PEICE-.;:

Tlit - i- i- ra i-s - ia-l i l i ir i l [ t l in l ri , f i - t i -n l - . r - .... 1 , - . |...r\ ml ; n . r l l i iii* .

Tv. .. ,-A.--i I n ivy 1 i. l.l.wh-il r .in ' .m F l a n -m.i ai, .'1 1 .*. |"T ynri! : w.rtii Se .

¦f' - i i , i'"n-i '- in - .I V Y mill! -in 'i . - l Ca l i l i i n F l a n -,, . I nl i s : , - . J...I* l a i . 1 ; w m t l l Ur.

T|,r ¦¦ i- .i - i - lii-ui i- i,:.i.i. - a i - l i i - 1 Can tunI i. t.;!. .-! Ill I'i* . pi*!' vai ' l '. w i n - i l l I M ' t*.

-f ' -. M - t i t i i 'r. - ¦ i-i i -i-i-- vji -. -v t iv . l . i - . l f-'iui i i ic! nt

i l i - |.i-r yiir-l ; wi.rtli I If*.-I'lill'l y'livf [i i . - . - .- - -,- r i -v L u - i i l i - .l Fl an i i - - ! lit

IV |„ -r y i r - ! : v. ..i l l , -jn - .-r ... - . i-l ilv , . i. i.¦.¦, - - wiii!- sliak.-i- Flannel

al ] ' - .- . |- i - y ir I ; --¦- • ¦r t i i I.V.

Al . l . 1 i l ' l . W i l l I 'K i l l .AXKKTS Ql'OT-i-:i) I . A S I ' Wl- .VAi AT - f l .'"."", -- f l .-'.-. .

>} . :•- ' A N U fj .i:; I :K 1)I " C::I >TH ... i . i- - ri-'.it l'Aiu.

Cioaky.lir-llclWls,

.-.;]*: irts.Boys' Clothing,

&c,, &c., &c.

Sweet, On* & CIG'S cele-l3ratad Ovaralis, Jackets,Coats. All-Wool Kersey..Tean and Cotton-MadePants : also their newWind-Proof Coats andVests. &(;.. &c.

. DILLON'SI' l i i n ' i . A i : u N : '.- i ' i : i i ';-;

Dl.'V ( loons ['.HTAI '.U.-mMKXT ,

31 and .33 Vernon ave.,

H UNTE R'S PO I NT,

L. I. CITY.(On 'y t w i . l.lui-L-1 li.mi I - I. If . It. i H-jKii .)

Medicinal.

CAVA RR H E1; ,'¦¦¦¦,-, ....,.*

P

' Z l^W^W Cleat! >- : U . -H-s l

Sg A,h 33l";mTc°io%$, *"ADJ tK"' mL*h thoKB W$ £2 sites. tlestoros

^^^^^ Q,,kk

^ Tu

'] -

HAY-FEVERtivo ° — -:-) .- i - l i lM al lli-tlir^i-sls*. nl i- .-li tM I.v l i lal! l iai i --

li -n- i l. iMiiliilili - ln mail llln-lll i . S-ii. l f.ii- i - m i i -I.11 - . 1*1.\ I l l l l l i 111.IIS . linns-i-Kllivi XII . N. V.

\\\\ ^ mm^^M

C?*li.l*MiBHwBr' ,«« ^*TB3i MHnJ^AiJ]L*Ji%-X Wf * Jy * !H -WS?^ff T BfTl ¦ngl.sVTt'l ¦ i\tf M%mmmf mr* *'

VJ^

1

TUJWSE =^ V I T A== UXKS4

SUPPOSITORIES.

Cold in the Head , j^ S ffljCATARRH ^ %»

VITA (OHIMW, lianil II Ulift St., N.Y.

An Gld SoldiersEXPERIENCE.

" CsJvert , TcSIVS,May 3, l.'ffi

" I -ari-'h to cxpross my aprrcciaiiou oi tliu¦jaliM.1.10 i-ualiLii--ji ot

Ayer's Claerry Pectorala,* r\ t*eu r*h romcly.

•• While with rlmrchi'.rs army, just beforatl..-* I- .ui..* of \ uk-tiuri : , l contracted a BC--»v*e e.dd . v * ., .- -i .1 iininatej iu a. dangerous- t o n s i l . 1 f 1.1; ! no reiu-i till on our mmrchv,t* «*.-!. *-¦ 1 » a country •••i. ,iv1 where, on jwlting1 •: joiuj rcui-eJ ' . I V...S ur^cd to try Avuu'dt ¦.:...; ¦.' I'ni - ; : \L .¦¦ 1 d -l ..'. and was rnrklly cared. Since

tli :: i !....¦ Ji " *: i »-*••" I'K. 'T.UtALconstantly Ly, . 1 . i..., 1 * i! -.* , :i. :.l 1 h.ive found it to bd- 1 ...\ . ..... .J rtt'iu-.U; 1 ' throat nml iun*jL.V.-J*. -.. •'• W* Vtomttmumtu"

1 in* ;* - u :.: J i.f ti *::ini..i" .:i..-i cert i fy to the

j . , : . -1 cure of .i.l hiofchl.il uml lung. .r..; i- ¦':--. h>* th*a I' .-J of AVEE'S CUEUHT

i u, f.u:.\i- l -.- .i '-.: v i r y palatable, Oio young*

1-1 chddr<.[i Uvic .i rciuhly.

1 r.rr.\r:ro KT

Dr.J.C.Ayorc-CoM Lowell j Mass.SiAil W all Dru-s'a**-

VIGOR feS XS^Stt K T\S

j V' < ffjioa k tli-j words hor t>«igue did falterHut. n i l her t ",irs and prayers were i.lle;

l ier f i t i i i e r tore - I her to tho hatter,:*'or h-j'd de '.erniiin.-i l 011 the bridlo.

She did ii- .I wish to s t i r rup str ife,. 'i 1 -- ' i her feelings .she did smother;

I '-i .l t-.tddli* he her married life—\r'.. . i- \. -.-lide I oue hat tovod m i a t H - r .

— [ l t d - t u n i ' u i i e r,

; r i t,,e w i n t r y \/iuds wi l l w III-: t lo1 .¦¦ 1 * ,*. ti uud e o i t n l r y o'er ,

A - . t i t ) youiijj man an.l his uu--s'!I,\ - . i sta.it*I in tbe en t ry dour.

I tu t heyon 1. w i t h i n tho parlur,'i'i.ov wi l l seel: lovuVs td i s s fn l gO-.il,

YVUile tUy r.re Ue.-p* ; n-lmrnin<;Up the nl i l ninn'-i cstly coal.

—[Somervil io Journal

We ilo>jn--o mere im-kless talk,M - i v.-.l I.v m ilapert and duuee';

liut Ai- I I /.:. -M'ks to WalkU wvi diYei'iiiug ways at mil u,

*Tis mi t ours to interrereW i t h t l te ut te ranee nature m r id",

I Jut Ilia vowel- , a l l app"urAngry ut tho eou*,onnnLs.

Al ways with eoncern politeWe f r o .u vii!,;ar sjji-ije h have * i r u n k ;

Tint A! inzu *-o¦ *:tis t o -n i^h tIrre m .¦.liabh* drunk.

__£*-Th, . V .:¦- ¦ it.; IlalL"

i;iilj?;mii.Kpnn n ¦ ri ie;i i*,s tneadnw \\:. ".

A : e r '.-.e ¦ ¦ ;» in i N " '.i a:;*!: '. uljIje a-iJHW.A . »,. h b,.|.l UK-HI there l - - i . i v

fu r :ai : . ei - :.a.v t!i "..i l^n - a-o.

They in "•¦:¦ -mu t d i l : i ' l ' - l l life l i i . -y drawV-i . '.-i . • :• ¦:¦. ¦¦• that hi var . na--.) ti) How.

Who !¦' u i - ¦¦•¦' 'T' H -i: a stlv -V Imvw.

She 1. -a. ; ¦'' , •« ¦¦'.it in J i : i M U ' * i--; fm i*'I ' l i r ¦'. ':.*!; .•.. i iea gatt-s, Sht' eniiu '.*; each

1\.< ;a.-' i l i id' I:ei's wn ; ever h " ,t .tl .u* uft ><K'Vr the way tle-y 've gu|»*

A r:u:i sla* has to go before,A bear for dog to guonl them we'l.

2%ww -rau yviv. jruess Ui..* itdiepUertk^s,And what Ll.e j -heop are, ean you tjlW

T:;!:e <i word t l u i t ui-eaits silent; decapitateIt , and leave a kind of Uii; decapitate agaiu¦»"d leave uot Well

VARIATIONS.

To sew ; to cook ; to mend ; to bo Ren.Ue; to value time ; to dress neatly; tckeep a secret; to be self reliant ; to mindthe baby; to avoid idleness ; to darn stock-ings ; to respect old age ; to make homehappy ; to catch & husband ; to hold hertongue: to make good bread ; to keep ahouse tidy ; to be above gossiping ; to con-trol her temper ; to tike care of tho sick ;to sweep down cobwebs ; to marry a manfor his worth ; to be a helpmate to her hus-band ; to keep clear of flash literature ; totake plenty of active exercise ; to seo amouse without screaming ; to read somebooks besides novels ; to bo light heartedaud fleet footed ; to wear shoes that won'tcramp her feet.

Yot xa Mix ! READ Tnxa.*—Tlte Volta-ic belt Co.. of Marshall. Mich., offer to sendtheir celebrated Electro-Voltaic Belt and otherElectric Appliance on trial for thirty days tom-eu i young or old) afflicted with nervous debil-ity, loss of vitality and manhood, and all kin-dred troubles. Also for rheumatism, neundgift,poi-alysts. and many, other diseases. Completerestoration to health, Tt*£os" tj ctd laanhood goa>anteed. 'o rt3t U lncu^^ ,asthmyd •5, trialts allowed. Write them at once for UhastnUedpamphlet ire-s. lyeoe "

What t.lrls Should Learn.

[Chicago Herald "Train Talk."]"Talking about being talked to death in a

barber's chair ," reiuurked t\ long haired pas-i-onger Irotn the WGst, "reminds me of a lit-tle experience I had «. iu e. Came nearer toboing laid out that time than ever I didaforo in in}- career. Happened this way:Down in Santa Fo a few years ago a greasernnd me had a quarrel, und I slapped his face.Ho tried to cut mo then, but didn 't, and wastaken away vowing vougeauce. About sixmonths ago I happened to be in Tucson , andwent into a shop to get shaved. Squattedin a chair, and closed my eye.-'. Alter thebarber had got me lathered and had begunto shave I opened my eyes and looked up Ihopj I may have to feed on sage hm.sh allmy life if tho barber a shaving me wa'ntmy old friend the greaser. I knew if horecognized me ho would not only suavemy chin but cut my throat, aud perhaps youcan imagine my feeling-*.

"I cloBod my eyes again pretty quick, youcan bet. I kept them clo.-.ed, too, as I kuowhe was as likely to recognize rno by my eyesns any way. Though he chattered to me Imado no reply, afraid he would know myvoice. Every movement he made with therazor I feared would be toward my throat.Every time ho stopped shaving I thought hohad recoguizod me, and was consideringwhether ho would cut off my ears beforesevering my jugular or not After about aweek, if seemed to me, ho finished tho job.As ho pulled tho cloth off me I jumped asquick as a flash out of tho chair, pulled myrevolver, and backed out of the room. Whena barber talks too much, or his razor pullsand you wish he was in a placo hot enoughto temper his instrument, just think of theagony I endured during that shave. I havehad such a horror of barbers over since thatnow I only get shaved and have my hair cutonce a year."

A .Little i:.\p<Tlcuee.

("Uncle Esek" in The Century.].All majorities are of the nature of a mob;

when mankind gets into a tight place italways looks to the minority for relief.

'* What a incomprehensible Mi randy'sgot to be sence she went to thur 'eademy," re-marked Mrs. Homespun to her hushand. *' W'y,wot's the gal been doln * now?" asked Daniel." Pom*!" exclaimed Mrs. Homespun , " w'y, shesaid she must go to her room to disrobe, as shewished to retire early." " Disrobe and retire?"murmured Daniel . *" wot's them, ina?" " I dun-no," replied ma: "but she didn 't do nothin " o'the sort. She only undressed and went to bed.Did ye ever hear o' sich p'evarication?" -Judg-ing from the groan that come frum Daniel it issafe to presume that he never did.

She Wu Eoana*d.Sho was a book agent. She called ia oar

office. She was very pretty and sweet, andwe fall in lore on the spot. " Sir, I am en-nfled " "Ob, wo aro eo sorry. Wbonia it to Ur She bloated and mo^etialywithdrew. She was new fo the bta^oe«&aad wctold p«ob*ft>tjr^was e&gaged ia tMlUn^, only we had to actin .wtf.4»to^^Xci^Bt JiSOTml

Mnjorltl-po.

Keminiscences of Democratic administra-tions of years gone by are constantly com-ing to li ght. "Kight over there," said anold society beau recently, pointing to abrown-stono front near the Executive Man.mm, " lives a woman who might have boecmistress of tho White Honse under Demo-emtio rulo if she had seen fit to accept th*hand of.'James Buchanan. Sho came froma very wealth y Pennsylvania family and wo*courted by Mr. Buchanan. Her peoplewanted her to marry him, hut she didn 'twaut to. She loved a poor clergyman , rec-tor of a church ia her town ; but the familydidn 't want her to marry him, and BO thoyarranged that ho should bo quietly trans-ferred to another post, some hundreds orthousand* of miles away. This broke npthe match and the maiden too, for she wentinto retirement at onj e and has murriod no-1'od y. Neither the banishment of her clergy-man nor tho elevation of Mr. Buchauan tothe l'resideucy could make her change hermind , nud she remained and remains single.Sho is nu old, withered and sad woman, liv.iug thero alone with her widowed sister inthat great mansion, with actually monatouey than they know how to use. Theyare tho richest peoplo in Washington, pos-sibly or.cepting Mr. Corcoran , aud they donothing with their wealth except to keep nptheir magnificent establishment and pot aloi of cats and dogs." Tho lady referredto is the one ot whom the story i» told thatMr. -Corcoran one day tent her a polite notesomewhat as follows: "* Mr DSAB MADAM ;I havo been for some time thinking of en-larging the Arlington Hotel. If yon will¦tato the valne of yoar brown-stone man-sion adjoining, I will send you my checkfor the amount." lb which she replied :Mr XIXAU MB. COOCOIUI? ; I bave for sometime Wn thinking of "eaUrging my flowergarden. If yoa wiii atate the vatne of theArlington Hotel adjo*tfng, I will send yoamy check for the amount."— WathinQtonIdtttr in Ba Uirrurj mmAm&ican.

DUCHAN AN 'S HOPELESS LOVE.

Have yon ever seek that train of white*e» thnt mokes the fast mail train fromChicago ?" said Uu engiiKer, as he muncheda sandwich at % ngBjgjB Sps. "Ko? Wall,it's sHoto thanaM-gi^nrd of Ughtning,and it goes full pilch «t of Chicago enSys»a«iuig at 3 o'clock. . In my opinion itwabont th« fastest th% p tbi* country.Well, one of th« naiie^a lavitad niawito4>wn to s*»0M tfti« atari; the otmdoctor•k*t*d 'ali aboard,' e»dtke clerk leaned

\T* M?" "¦***W$m* -*"••**¦* *'<*e tow QatrtBiTawicWAylgtoffaaft vMI

Fast Rnttre«d!ak.

[Detroit Free l'ress.]Riding out from Chattanooga toward

Bridgeport uu hor.sebaek , I came across anative who had a s-oat ou a rock quite npiece above the road. If ho had n't rattleda stono down jn*-t as I came opposite hemight havo o-capod undetected. Ho had agun across his knees, and 1 called to himi

"Pretty gootl hunting around heroT"Miiy lie," ho answered.""What do you find/""Nuthiu 1 j -it.71

JIo soeinrd so cranky that I was about torido on , when ho rose up and descended totho road. He didn't look a bit good na-turod , and he hold his shot-gun in a vorycarelos-j maimer aa ho said:

"Stranger, you mought havo como fromChattanooga V

"Yes. ""You moug ht had company part o* the

wny ('*"Yes. A man on a mule rodo with mo ae

far ns the forks, half a mile back.""Man with reddish ha'r—long nose—whi&-

kor*. ou hii chin—swears a good deal t""That's him.""And, hang him , he turned off , did hoi**"Yes—took tho right hand road.""Jist like him—• ji.it liko tho onerery 'pos-

sum ho is! Stranger, that 'ere feller shotmy father more'n two years ago, aud he wastho game 1 was wnitm' fur l He's got threedifferent roads to go au1 como by, and jist assure as I'm watchiu' ono he'll go by t'c*hor.He's fooled mc all summer long in this way,nnd I'm gi t t in ' that desperit that if I missbim to-morrer I shall have to go up tq hiaclearing und take a shot at him as he sots inthe door smokin' his pipe! Stranger, what'syer real , downright , Christian opinion of aman as will put another man out tho way hohas mei"

A Man "Who Skulked.

LNcw York Telegram.]"I gue.-is tho old man must have spent ovor

$t.Q,tj(R) um policy ," said a gentleman to a re-porter, pointing to a gray-whiskered, stoop-shouldered , troubled-faced looking person,who had just emerged from a suspicious-ionkiu^ ''oncuange olliee'' on the Bowery,Now York. "1 knew him iu New Orleans,"he continued, "wheu he was in business forhimself and was worth at least £-10,000. To-day he is not worth a cent Ho makes a pro-curious living as a copy ist, and never getshoi 1 of a dolhi r but what lie will invest a-portion of it iu jx i l icy . In his palmy days hewould invest hun ire is uf dollars in lotterytickets; now ho oitou plays a "gig" for 2cents and upward. Ho never patronizes ugaming tabb. hut pilicy play ing has been amania with him for the past thirty years,and of the thousands ho has squandered I donot believe ho ever received i per cent, iu re-turn. I havo often given him a ilinu or aquarter. 1 tell 3-ou, this gambling business—any way you may tix it—is worse ou aman than drink.

A Mania for l'oliey.

[New York Sua.]All Indiana railroad company onco em-

ployed (Jen. Foster to draw up a contractfor them. He drew it on one sheet of paperund charged $230. Tho cuitip-any paid andgrowled. He told them to try a certainhigh-priced lawyer tbo next time. They didao. The other lawyer sent around and bor-rowed tho copy of tho old contract ft0111George, turned in a neatl y ongro-y-oi sheet,nud charged $2,500. But the company feltsatisfied that thoy had a contract that wouldhold water.

A Greater Isoun.[Chicago Times.]

A London scientist is endeavoring to pro-duce cats without tails. Thta is certainly anoble phase of scientific oxporim.»nt, but homight confer a greater boon upon humanityif bo would produce tails without cata,

Wanted a High-Priced Document.

Consider thnt the descent of snow has ro-tations not alone to fancy, bat it is also aworker. We send abroad to tho islands andtho coast of South America, to bring hitherthe stimulant that shall kindle now life inthe wasted soils and bring forth now har-vests, aud yet from the unsullied air snowbrings down fertility. In the endless wasteithat are going on, exhaled gases, and fromtowns and cities multi plied forms that arephantoms wandering iu the sky, get caughtiu tho meshes of thu suow, the ainmonincalgases, and various others are broug ht downby it and laid upon the soil. An 1 it hasbecome a proverb that snow, fresh and nevv-f.1 lien , is the poor man's manure. It gath-ers again the waste material of the earth ,whose levity carries it above and ruins withequal distribution over all the lands thatwhich briugs back to them thoir needed fer-tility. When tho snow has covered thogarden aud bodge, is it a pall, is it a shroudor is it not swaddling clothes ? Tho oldabandoned stalk , tho brown and witheredgrass, no longer comely, it puts them torest and is indeed a shroud. But under-neath this is going on those processes thatore long shall bting forth all bads and allcomely bloom and all ripening things. Un-derneath its twilight, spring ia preparing itswork , without sound of wheel , withoutitroko of hammer ; more is going on underihe sileut snow to-day and in the comingseek than in all the smithies, than in allthe factories, than iu all the dwellingsor shops npon the earth. And all theforces of nature, spring, winter, summer,tbe thousands of forces whose energy is ir-resistible, they all are silent, they all arehidden. The powers of God in tho earthare all silent wonder-workers.— UenryWarimQmtoru

^ m ExptntiENca vs. lK«xPC*n«rct—It is a

matter of regret that in ^troduelaj cUood'a ^r-Raoarilla. IU proprietors are obllg-ed to over-Sme a certain distrwt by so-m^p-eopto whohave u

^ ^ly^ ^°^ S„SI?'

.-kY.sun.ui. CcLf* Co. am r-rttabie phaana-JKaof hraf expcrfcuce.and thry aiaSk-s noctalci*f^oodVKaJ-MparlJla wh ch eaooot be »ai>ManSSSd t^SrVsttwi^*

pre*. And wt wy

s it i iSit. V?« art eonaoeot «u will ,not ba dtsat>53nted , but wW And rt *jHSI>l-2L»T^¦rSu^which can betmpUettly relied upon, wodoses*. w

THE POWER IN THE SNOW.

The Conversion of Dull Colored X*ead Into•U M i t t-Tin a While.

To begin with, what is white load, whichIs the basis of nearly all paints ?

l i Don't know."It would bo odd if you did. Now and

then you may find somo one to tell yoa thatlb") same load yon mold into bullets is thewhite lead you seo in the paint-pot , but jouwill ask a great many peoplo befora you findDUO to exp lain the process of manufactureLet us follow it ont.

Iron is melted into what is called " pigs"for shi pment nnd for convenient use. It isthe samo with loud , ouly tho " pigs " arenot as large and heavy, Tho first step Inthe manufacture is to corrode the lead. Wswill take what is called tho " old Dutchprocess," because that makes the best arti-cle. Tho "pigs " are tossed into a meltingfurnace, and when reduced to a liquidstato the metal is drawn off into moldswhich aro called " buckle-molds." Thslead thus molded is called a " buokle ," be-ing a little round cake nearly as large as asaucer, but uot so thick , and perforated inmany places.

These "buckles " are carried by an end-less belt and dropped into earthern jars ofvarious sizes. At tlio bottom of each jar isa small quantity of acetic acid. When a jarIs full of " buckles ," which have been drop-ped iu without regard to order, it is remov-sd to the corrodiug houae. Here tho Jarsnro placed ill a row, covered by boards, theboards covered by two inches of tanbark ,and thou another course of jars is added un-til all tho room is taken up. There Is noth-ing more to do for ninety days except towait. Tho acid at once begins its work onthe " buckols ," and corrosion is tho result.It isu't the acid direct , but its fumes, andthe perforations of which I spoke permit\ho fumes to get at all parts of the littlecake.

Xt tho end of niuety days the lead shouldbo corroded. The " buokles " are thenbleached out until they look Hko crackers,and will crumble to pieces at the touch.Tbe same acid which has befriended us inthe corrosion is now our worst enomy, andmust be got rid of. Haven't you rubbedyour hand along the clapboards of a houseand found it smeared with a white powder?Well, that house was painted with leadfrom which tho acetic acid wag not thor-oughly washed out , nnd the pniut was killedand powdered up.

The jars ore taken to tho washing troughsand their contents emptied in , aud thewater is then let in nnd the batch is sluiceduntil wo havo a mixture the color of railkand scarcely heavier. After a deal of wash-ing the water is drawn off and the lead isfound at the bottom of the troughs. If theacid has been taken ont it is shoveled into}ars again , and these are carried into a hut*iir room aud left for the water to evapo-rate. When this has bsen accomplishedthe contents of the jnrs are emptied ou copper dry ing-pans heated by steam. The stufinow looks liko ico cream, but soon drieiuutil it is as fins au 1 almost as white natlour. To make paltt it simply hr.s to boground iu oil.

Let me ask you if that wasn't a curiousdiscovery ? Who could have got the Ideaiuto his head as ho looked nt a bar of leadHint it would preserve and beautif y thebuildings of the world ? Aud tbo procesirequires so much rime that men turns!have spent yeara In experimenting to goithe right acid and the proper method of us.lug.

flow , to prove to yon that this whitepaiut was ouce metal , we'll tttks this p ieceof charcoal , di g out a small hole iu the cen-ter , and fill tho cavity with paint. Nowlight your coal, nnd put your blow-pipo atwork , and what is the result ? A raggedbutton of lead ! Aeid made it paiut—fireturus it back to its original state.

The corroder shi ps to the paiut factoriesby tho barrel. At the factories tho dry stuffis poured into paint mills, oil added , amithe stuff is ground through three differentmills beforo it comes out as yoa see it inthe paint cans. If the paint man is makingpure lead he adds nothing. If ho so desiresthe lead is adulterated while grinding.There is a species of quartz rock calledbarytes. When this is pulverized it closelyresembles lead , aud is largely used to adul-terate it.

HOW WHITE PAINT IS MADE,

Lacy (Cleveland, Ohio,) has been mar.ried three weeks and has not yet informedber parents. Her husband wants to go andexplain , bat her father Is a man of ferocioustemper, and she is afraid to have the twogentlemen meet. Lucy wants to know whatto do about it, and says, " Please answer atonce." It is n bad job , Lucy, and thelooner you tell the old folks tho better.Tho louger you wait the moro the exp lana-tions and excuses. If , as yon say, yourhusband " is a gentleman , and full y able tolupport mo," and your parents are notutterl y devoid of common sense all will bswell. Of course you shall not havo got mar-ried without letting them know, bat that iaspilt milk. This small bit^of advice, how-ever, will not be amiss. When a girl makesa marriage of which she has no reason to beashamed , she should be neither ashamednor afraid to tell of it beforehand. If, how-aver , she has reason to suppose that hoimarriage would bo opposed , and success,fully so, were her intentions known, then,having married, she should personally, byletter , through her husband, by somemeans, immediately inform her parents.There is no eud of trouble following a mar*flags kept secret.— Progress.

SPEAK IT OUT.flow ScIf-.Hurdere-m Are Made Dy Iniaii-

l iy and DUense.

Dr. Macdonald , tho celebrated authorityon mental diseases, was found in his privateoffice on Ward's Island, recently, reading anow German work on suicide.

" Does iusauity cause the majority of sui-cides in this country, doctor ?" waa asked.

" That is a very difficult question to an-swer," replied Dr. Macdonald. ''Cases ofsuicide are more frequent in years of groatbusiness depression and panics , bnt moreespecially during tho years of the Prcsl-iential election. Statistics show that theincrease of self-murders is greater than thoincrease of the population. Thia is largelydue to the great influx of foreigners. Thepercentage is much greater among Frenchand German, but more cases occur in thelatter race. Perhaps there is no peoplefonder of its Fatherland than the Germannand very frequently the young emigrants tothis country commit suicide from no*Uilgia,or, as it is commonly called, homesickness."

" Do you think suicide is an evidence ofInsanity ?"

"No, indeed," said the Doctor ; "moresane peoplo commit suicide than insane.However, attempts ore constantly madeamong a certain class of people who, likeyoung Khinelander, for instance, althoughnot what could be called insane, yet oughtnot to be allowed by their friends to havecomplete liberty. Acts of violence ore sureto follow, and, if it is not on "-attempt athomicide, it is certain to be suicide."

4 * Insanity in its literal sense means a lossof health or weakness of the body. Thereare many cases of suicide caused by chronicdyspepsia or great mental disturbance onaccount of business troubles. The rapidway in which we now live has much to dowith these sudden and terrible endings oflife. Another cause which bos lately in-creased the nnmber of suicides is the factthat there ia a law which punishes an at-tempt at one's life. This, strange as it mayseem, does not deter, but on the other handincites many to tbe horrible deed. There isa certain fascination In doing that which isforbidden. Then, again, wben a man triesa peculiar mode of suicide thero are alwaysimmediately afterward other attempts in thesame manner. '.There have as yet been noattempts from Brooklyn Bridge, but youmay be sure the first case from this struct-ure will be followed by many others. Thenewspapers make the details of suicidesmore pnblic now than formerly, antl thiscertainly lias a tendency to increase thenumber."

** Can yon tell ma some of tbe causes ofinsanity ?'"' was asked.

"Tboite cases cUrsctfy under my super-vision are eanaed by intemperance, impropernourishment, lota cf work, and, in the caseoff many foreigners, borne sic nesa. But, asyoa know, we only receive paupers at tbisLns&tatlon, and, as might bo expected witbtbis class, tba want of nourishing food bvery; tcn tho^ cause of th*ir insanity.

2flia^^«P^^ttoa and im to U weisWi -wwMS^

SUICIDE ON THE INCREASE.

Mak6 two bags, each about a foot longand six inches wide of some dark material,and sow them together ai the edge, so thatone may bo inside tho other. Next mako anumber of pockets , each with a cover to it ,which may bo fastened down with a buttonuid loop. Place these about two inchesspart , between the two bags, sewing onoside of the pocket to ono bag and the otherlide to the other. Make slits throug h bothbags about an inch long, just above thopockets, so that you can put your hand inthe bags ; and , by inserting your thumband finger through these slits, you may ob-tain entrance to tbe pockets and bring outof them whatever they contain. It is, o!course, necessary that a variety of articlesshould be put iu tho pockets. Before com-menclng the trick you may turn the bag in-side out any number of times , so that youraudience may conclude that it is quiteempty. You can thon cause to appear ordisappear any number of articles of a li ghtnature, much to tho amusement of youraudience.

Tlit-* MjMtrrloui Huff.

A good story is told at tbo ezpeoso ofLieutenant General Sheridan. The lasttime he was in New York, and while diningwith a friend, he declared that there wasonly one place In America where roaitchicken conld be provided to exactl y suittho requirements of his taste. Tho ideawas laughed at, but finall y General Sheri-dan invited hi* friend to join a party andtest tbe matter the next evening. Accord-ing ly six or seven gentlemen sat down to adinner , of which tho chief diah was roantchicken. Duriug that course Phil alternat-ed his mouthful* with laudatory remarks ,asserting tbe delicacy of tho flavor, tho ton-dernesa of the flesh, the daintiness of thocookery, and so on, until souiebodj '¦*» irre-pressible grin set tho table in a roar. Thenthe swindle wss uproariously exposed. Theparticular chicken set beforo Phil wasbogus—uot a chicken at all , except for thoskin and tho bones, the rest being a cloverstructure of veal and pfg, in imitation ofthe fowl, aud impregnated with chickengravy.

Hast tha C.fo.ul at II."Say, Sam, did yoa aee d. mn aba-nt

dat houM F' "OU, yea j I teed him. aodbe gib nu d. rttemd ob At bco-M."* " Ho»long did ba gib joa la "t*l*tiisl ob hitT""TotaUr. Ka rel-ca** to hab aaythiog tatto*t m..''-r<ai sS{f*{/>ii5«.

Sk.rlaU* H gld.

a»»a»IMsa*aAAs*-**. t A i assSsss*! M lK4a. t t t t t t t I

L-ill.-* Island First, Last and All tbe Timo,

TllK S I G N A L,I1. -1 ¦:¦.! In l iu [ i , l . -r. - - i - i-f Iho Whii l i - I'on|j Iij —

a-illlulll Iti'iMT-l I" I' a r l v iir S.-ia . Iliiri- . Sexnr I i i i i i i - i i i i i a l l- j- ' -jri.li-.- -. in I' lilili .-imil

ivvt-ry -inliirda**.

i i A T K S OF M'K - :' ltll*TIt>S—POST-PAID:O M: i -.ii- .- . :; M n . -i n - . •'- ' <-'T..; n SWaXTiw, J1.00;

1 VK.UI. ;¦' •:•' : -• VK.U1- . fi.00.

TK-s l i i r l t- . O M: *I 1..U- . :r-.-.i .

I F NUT i M I . -- TI .'H T l - V I N " ADVAXOS, 23.,.-r . .ai t -. l i l l I "- inl !.*'l I '* I I I - i i l invc nitt-.- .—Nn II.-IIII -.- H wilf lm i- i ' i v i i l i ' - u i payment lmii*eil it 111 Hi - - - ¦ m iii ' li- . U' I'.I - I-- .- . i ram-i- i i i i -n: - liavi: huen,„:„!, - i „ l i n n - l li a - i . " •¦¦" I' a v - N . i l- .i l.i -r .-'

[ ' I I T i i > nn!- - r i l l .- !!.-¦ r. -1 ¦ 1, a ¦ — ra! I l n - i r '.3'jer-irh in::.-.!. lini-M L'tV" tl. Unilr nli! a- wei l lis i iuw }nii 'lr ."-.- .' Oli i i - r i i i.-. - I . .. i li . i l i -ri- i- call lie lliadt- .

I ' O I ' i l K- s i ' O N n l -'N I ' l J nn any t-ubji-i-t , ul Hiifil-r-i .-ii l Inr-a l i i iH-r i - l I 'i Iv -.'. ¦iHT'ilIy la lk i .-rl alioiu ,K.. ] i i - i ' ' - i l fr mi i i i -rv ¦mrt nt I l n - " fn!nii i l . Mi-n; 'i.- i i - - i ji . Iii.-al i-i i i i i l . i l . mul i ! i - ; i i i t r -s between iml i -vi.!. . i i - i nn ! - - -- ill i*i-iii-ral [mlilic interest) ii'ilu i i i i t . - i l . All i- ' i a i i n i i i i i . - l i i iu .u i i i i iMt lm nccoinjia- -ii 'ii -.l fry a ri-,'*mj!»ibje "mum.

.1011 I ' l l l N T I M S ul Every De-KTipll-wl—Good !Vi ink , nt Low I'r!.:.--..

'•'I'lfifS- fi.ijj ipl Ci-fl . A l l IH II H tulij . - i t lusir a l l - i l i . - r : » I I !.I -. - .

A groat deal depend* on the man vhccurries the plate. He needs to hare a sharpeyo, of coarse, net to miss anybody, be-cause there is not one chance in 1,000 ofhia being called back. What he neoda morethan anything else, though, is business tact.There's everything in knowing how to passa plate to different people. Some of themare cranky. If yon pat the plate at themtoo persistently they feel offended, and takepride in not contributing a cent for sixweeks. Then other people bave their littleweaknesses, and want their light to have •good chance to shine. I knew a man who,if a plate came to him empty, wonld put oaa quarter or u half, and be satisfied wittstarting it Ihat way ; bnt, if there were alot of quarters and things on already, he'djust ns like as uot slap down a dollarbill. And he'd get at least a dollar's wortbof satisfaction in watching the hesitation ofthe man next to bim, wbo knew they wenas good as he, and yet didn't like to give somnch. Why, Tve hod a plate eome sailingby me jnst loaded with bills, and you'dthink the congregation was extravagantlyliberal, whoa the fact waa tbat tiro or thro*men started in that way, and Uu nitwouldn't take a bluff.—Ntu Tori Sua.

l-nXt-a.TM, my son, it ia a solemn, -terraa! f a s t

that *.* Truth one. crushed to earth will riseagain." And in thaw daya of awful care.EBbatti truth ia kept ao boaity «ajs*j»d iap^dnaing tb» grand rising act that ch*look* like a man picking -up pin*..—Bur.dtttt '

PASSING THE COLLECTION PLAT&