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MODULE 1 LIFE GIFTS & PERSONALITY TYPES “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. . Psalm 139:14

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MODULE 1

LIFE GIFTS &

PERSONALITY TYPES

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully

made; your works are wonderful,

I know that full well.”. Psalm 139:14

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BB LIFE SKILLS WORKBOOK

MODULE 1: LIFE GIFTS & PERSONALITY TYPES

Objectives

You will discover and understand your preferred relationship- styles.

By understanding your preferred relationship- styles, you will be able to identify your strengths and developmental needs.

You will learn to adjust your relationship- style and interact with people with different or similar relationship- styles. This will help you to understand others’ behavior preferences.

Learning Outcomes

At the end of this Module you will:

1. Discover your behavior preference and how to express this effectively.

2. Examine areas of your life where you can exercise self-discipline and self-control.

3. Develop an action plan for successfully exploiting your gifts and personality.

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“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”.

(Psalm 139:14)

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WHAT IS MYRELATIONSHIP STYLE?

PART 1 – Let’s Complete the Questionnaire!

Each row in the table below contains four sets of words and phrases. Looking across each row, one at a time, select the word or phrase that you feel most closely describes you.

In the associated ‘Score’ column, write ‘4’ against that word or phrase that you feel most closely describes you, ‘3’ against the word or phrase that you feel next closely describes you, ‘2’ against the next and ‘1’against the word or phrase that you feel least closely describes you.

For instance, if you feel that ‘stable’ most closely describes you from the four words in row 1, ‘people-oriented’ next closely describes you, ‘cautious’ next and‘ driving’ least closely describes you, you will fill out row 1 like this:

Example:

Row No.

A Score B Score C Score D Score

1 drivieng 1 people-oriented 3 stable 4 cautious 2

Each description should have only one unique score (any number from 1 to 4), i.e., you cannot write the same number twice in the same row.

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1 2 3 4

Least closely describes you

Most closely describes you

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Think about your relationships with your friends. Attempt the following personality- type questionnaire.

Go to row 1 and rank the four words or phrases in that row according to the how closely each closeness it describes you. Enter your scores in the ‘Score’ columns. Continue until you have assessed and ranked all the words and phrases in all ten columns.

Descriptions for each row should have only one unique score (any number from 1 to 4).

Row No.

A Score B Score C Score D Score

1 driviengpeople-oriented

stable cautious

2 confident positivethinks before acting

shy

3makes decisionsfast

keenstays in comfort zone

systematic

4breaks new ground

happy to receive

waits for others

careful

5risk-takinger

acts on impulse

calms otherslikes accuracy

6 likes to win convincingdemands little of others

asks questions

7assertive personality

chattyputs self down

thoughtful of others

8likes different things

outgoing personality

relaxedlikes established routine

9strong- willed

thinks about others

genuine with others

wants things to be correct

10Cconstantly on the go

responds with feeling

likes things & people to stay the same

Tthinks things through carefully

Total Total Total Total

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1 2 3 4

Least closely describes you

Most closely describes you

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PART 2 – Now…Let’s Add Up Mythe Scores

Add up the scores in each of the four columns and enter the total in the space beside ‘TOTAL’ for columns A to D. The total scores of each column should not exceed 40 and the total for the four columns should be 100.

In the last row of the above table, write ‘DRIVIENG’ for column A, ‘PEOPLE-ORIENTED’ for column B, ‘STABLE’ for column C and ‘CAUTIOUS’ for column D in the spaces provided.

The four total scores on the chart table show the relative strength of your preference between among the four relationship- styles.

The highest total shows your dominant personality style with which you relate to other people. If you have two totals of the same value, then you have an equal preference between those two relationship- styles.

PART 3 – Understanding Your Style Aand Using It

There is no one style that is better than another. There is no such thing as a ‘right’ relationship style nor a ‘wrong’ one. As individuals, we benefit from having a variety of relationships and our world is much more interesting and more effective because of this variety we bring to our relationships.

The key is to understand your dominant style, and the style of others, to maximise your effectiveness in relating to other people and your understanding of of other peoplethem. Sometimes, differences in relationships affect the way we relate to each other and prevent us from getting the most out of a situation or relationship.

If we understand ours and others’ relationship- styles, we can focus on look at the ‘content’ of a message and ‘package’ the content accordingly.what others want to say rather than the way they say it.

Read from the following pages the description of your dominant style. If you have two scores that are the same, then you have an equal preference between those two styles and you should read both descriptions. Take a minute to reflect on the notes, and think about situations where you may have experienced the types of things described in the notes.

With a blue highlighter:

highlight those notes with which you agree.

With a yellow highlighter:

highlight those notes points you would like to improve on or be more conscious of in your way of doing things.

After this Module, you might like to think about the people you know and then read the pages that describe their styles. Reflect on how the notes for those styles describe

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characteristics of people you know.

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DRIVIENG STYLE

H What ow You Are l L ike

You focus on outcomes, generally wanting results now! You see yourself as decisive and moving things along with the force of your energy or personality.

You work directly through others by directing or energising them. You tend to be assertive and drivieng in meeting your objectives.

You are very task or goal oriented.

What You Are Good At

You tend to be clear, forceful and decisive.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you come across as a high achiever, a strong-willed person and someone who is able to deliver on your promises.

What You Must b B e Watchful Of

You seem to tend to be opinionated, stubborn and defiant.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you come across as unresponsive, lacking in trust and domineering.

What Motivates You

You seek satisfaction through achievements and the ability to influence.

What Demotivates You

You are demotivated by your own lack of find it difficult to trust in others and/or to expectation that the best from others will give their best.

Using Your Style To Serve In The Boys’ Brigade

Think about how you relate to others and how you can be more receptive to them and their ideas.

Since Oothers also have different styles and motivations., consider how you can benefit from accessing more fully their ideas and contributions.

Consider how you will benefit from accessing more fully their ideas and contributions. Think about how you can include others’ contributions from the perspective of their individual strengths and weaknesses.

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PEOPLE –ORIENTED STYLE

How What You Are Like

You focus on relating to others, knowing that results come through investmenting in people.

You see yourself as keen, enthusiastic and moving things along with the force of your personality and your ability in managing relationships.

You work directly through interactions with others by enthusing them or inspiring them. You tend to be friendly and persuasive in getting others to help meeting your objectives.

What You Are Good At

You tend to be refreshing and energizing.

You are a welcome and persuasive influence.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you will appear to be in touch with others and open to them.

You are good in teams and relationships.

What You Must b B e Watchful Of

You seem tend to be impulsive and insincere.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you will appear to be withdrawn, over-emotional or superficial.

What Motivates You

You seek satisfaction through inclusion, and acceptance by others, and directly influencing others.

What Demotivates You

You are demotivated by the lack of acceptance by others and the inability to achieve your goals through influencing others.

Using Your Style To Serve In The Boys’ Brigade

Think about how you relate to others.

Consider how you can be clearer and more defined both about others and their operating environment. Others may look for a more systematic or logical approach and you will benefit from thinking things through more analytically.

Think about how you can extend the tools available to you to achieve outcomes with others, in addition to using the influence of your personality on them.

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STABLE STYLE

How What You Are Like

You focus on predictability ,and generally desire an unruffled environment and uncontroversial relationships. You see yourself as systematic and reliable in achieving outcomes.

You work directly through situations by preparing, planning and working according to a routine.

You tend to want to do one thing at a time and to give every project the right amount of time and commitment.

What You Are Good At

You seem tend to be reliable, and supportive, and to have a high commitment to internal and external commitments or responsibilities.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you desire to work on agreed targets, and plans, and to meet articulated expectations.

What You Must b B e Watchful Of

You seem tend to be resistant to change or to progressing outcomes that are still in progress, preferring to .

You tend to turn back to what is known or expected.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you often times appear to be over-concerned with process and procedure.

There is an unwillingness to consider the bigger picture.

You are generally not strong in communication.

What Motivates You

You seek out known and non-threatening environments, processes and relationships.

What Demotivates You

You are demotivated by unpredictability, such as unknowexpectedn events and unanticipated actions.

You dislike things that are not going according to plan.

Using Your Style To Serve In The Boys’ Brigade

Think about how you relate to others rather than to the situations and environment, and .

Hhow can you can be more flexible?.

As Oothers also have different styles and motivations, consider how you will can

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benefit from asking them for more information earlier, rather than waiting for things to unfold.

Think also about how you can inform others of your needs and preferences.

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CAUTIOUS STYLE

How What You Are like

You focus on precision and risk avoidance.

You generally set and expect to achieve very high standards.

You are reserved and expect things not only to be done correctly but also to be seen to be done correctly.

You work directly through situations by controlling them or by setting standards and expectations for processes, outcomes and relationships. You tend to be a perfectionist.

What You Are Good At

You seem to be careful, reflective and evaluative.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you appear to be a controller of standards, and an individual who is reflective and reliable.

There is a creative and sometimes inventive element in you.

What You Must b B e Watchful Of

You seem tend to be a perfectionist and unrealistic.

You are a hard taskmaster, being unrealistic about what can be achieved.

In terms of meeting the needs of others, you appear to be over-critical, picky and out-of-touch with others.

What Motivates You

You seek satisfaction through precision and accuracy in meeting objectives.

What Demotivates You

You are demotivated by find it difficult to accept less than very high standards in process, outcome or relationship.

You are also demotivated by do not handle unkind or critical responses, which you tend to have difficulty in handling well.

Using Your Style To Serve In The Boys’ Brigade

Think about how you relate to others, rather than to processes and standards.

As Oothers also have different styles, motivations and less demanding standards.,

Tthink about how you can work with others them to achieve on a set of agreed processes, standards or relationships.

Think about how you can better listen to others and inform convey your ideas

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toothers them.

Action Plan To Realize My Gifts and Potential

How can I interact better with others?

a)

b)

c)

How can I work more effectively with others?

a)

b)

c)

How To Interact With And Understand Others’ Behaviour Preferences

Not everyone has the same behaviour preference as you. Some people have different preferences and need different ways are needed to understand them.

When working or playing with others, ask them what they prefer. Are they motivated by assertion or by precision and accuracy?

Sometimes, it can be difficult to communicate with and understand others because they deliver information in a manner outside your communication and learning style.

When people are different from you, instead of being annoyed with them, take it as an opportunity to learn something new from them and about them. We all need to be able to communicate with people who have different preferences.

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Learning Opportunities at BB:

Choose one of the following two case studyies and answer the following questions that follow:.

Case Study 1

William and Stanley are members of the same BB Company. While both have some common interests like soccer (which is also a major activity in the Company), they also have different interests. William is more athletic, while Stanley is more studious, preferring chess games and computers.

Over time, they both begin to grow in friendship. However, William begins to improve in his soccer skills in a dramatic way, as he eagerly practices every weekend. When William was finally selected to play for the Company team in an upcoming tournament, he boasts constantly to Stanley that he is the only secondary one Boy to be selected. Stanley, like some of the secondary one Boys, feels that William is given preferential treatment. Without asclarifyking the situation with their Officers, Stanley and the other Boys begain to give William the cold shoulder.

What do you think are the challenges in this case study?

Based on your learning from this module, how will you make the situation better?

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Case Study 2

Raju has been feeling that he is an ordinary person with no great talent to boast of. One of the reasons why he joined the BB was because he did not feel that any of the sports and games in the school co-curricular activities (CCAs) would take him in. In addition, he felt that joining a club or society would make him even more ‘colourless’ or ordinary.

While he is not short on enthusiasm, he is beginning to feel that he has nothing to contribute. Raju has seen that he does not get called on by the Officers as often as others. He feels that he is not appreciated also by his peers. An incident after last week’s parade has further depressed him. During the distribution of players for games purposes after last week’s parade, none of the older Boys in charge of the four teams wanted Raju in their teams. It was only after Mr Lee, his Squad Officer, had insisted that one team take him, that he finally had a team. This week, Raju doesn’t really feel like going to parade.

What do you think are the challenges in this case study?

Based on your learning from this module, how will you make the situation better?

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