Newsletter
Mayor Marianne Meed Ward was elected as the 29th mayor of Burlington, Ontario in October of 2018. She is also the sec-ond woman to hold that position in Burlington’s history. She previously served as a Burlington city councillor for 2 consecu-tive terms, from 2010 to 2018. Prior to her career in politics, Marianne worked for 22 years as a journalist for clients in-cluding the Toronto Sun, Vision TV, CBC, CHCH news, Chatelaine, Ryerson University and more, committed to keeping people informed about the issues and information that impact their lives.
Meed Ward campaigned on stopping overdevelop-ment in Burlington, spe-cifically downtown. She had also campaigned on addressing traffic conges-tion, flood risk, protecting the cities tree canopy, tax reform and building trust between the community and council.
She lives in Burlington with her husband, 3 chil-dren, and their Wheaten terrier, Boston.
Www.probusclubofburlington.ca
Probus Club of Burl ington
U pcoming
Speakers
May 23 - John Garsh-
ennek - IKEA
June 20 - Michael
Gervers - Title TBD
July 18—TBA; TBD
August 15—TBA ; TBD
Marianne Meed Ward Mayor of Burlington
April 2019
T he next meeting of the Probus Club
of Burlington will be held on Thursday April 18th, 2018 at 10:00AM at the Art Gallery of Burlington.
E xtending the hand
of welcome…
What better way to begin
our morning than with a
firm handshake and a
friendly smile from our
four greeters, Doug
Macdougall ; Bill Wil-
liams ; Jack Segaert ;
Henry Hadley ; guaran-
tee this and will set the
tone for the morning in
true Probuscian style.
Thanks Gentlemen.
Th
e M
ay
or
Of
Bu
rlin
g-
ton
Ou
r A
pri
l S
pea
ke
r
bus. Hey, WE WON! Milbur Giles
has had the Grummett trophy en-
graved with our name for 2019 and
it will be on display at the back after
the meeting for those interested.
Bill Wilson of Burlington Lakeshore
took home the crying towel on their
behalf.
This win brings the overall Grum-
mett Bonspiel results to 10 wins for
Burlington Probus vs. 12 wins for
Burlington Lakeshore Probus. How-
ever, we have won 8 of the last 10
Bonspiels so the winning trend is
definitely with us.
The cash bonus for the highest scor-
ing rink in the spiel was won by the
Glen Huffman rink from Burlington
Probus.
It was a fun day of curling for all and
I (Dawson Kilpatrick) would like to
thank all the participants for
turning out and playing for our
until it reaches daylight when it tum-
bles spectacularly over the escarpment
south of Chedoke Golf Course.
“Daylighting” is the term for what has
been done in many cities where under-
ground storm sewers have been raised
almost to ground level and become
areas of scenic attraction. Looking
something like a meandering creek of
the past. It’s not likely this will happen
on the West Mountain in Hamilton,
but John Terpstra wishes it could and
become another good example for what
to do with underground storm sew-
ers.
On Wednesday, March 6th 20 curlers
(five rinks) from Burlington Probus
played against an equal number of
curlers from Burlington Lakeshore
Probus in the 22nd annual Grummett
Bonspiel. The results of the five
matches were 3 wins , 1 tie, and 1 loss
for Burlington Probus, which produced
a point score win for Burlington Pro-
We 82 Probustians who populated
our meeting on March 21, certainly
wondered what we were going to
hear from a speaker who has been
known as a carpenter, house build-
er, furniture maker, home renova-
tor, prize winning poet, and author
of non-fiction. More to the point, we
were told he was going to speak
about his book, “Daylighting Che-
doke Creek”, Clever title, but I and
probably others, were having trou-
ble figuring out what it was about.
However, John Terpstra cleverly
conveyed to us what this creek busi-
ness was all about. He described
what maps of our continent would
show before humans made their
appearance. The creeks and rivers
on a map would look much like the
veins and arteries of a human body
as they supply and drain every
pound of flesh. Just imagine how
much water there was left when 87
gazillion tons of Ice Age ice decided
to melt. OH, A QUESTION …. LIKE
THE CHICKEN AND EGG …. DID
ICE COME BEFORE WATER?
So, when humans began to occupy
almost every square metre of habit-
able and, they found they needed
those creeks for drainage. So, near
their sources, creeks were often di-
verted to roadside ditches. (OK,
CHICKEN AND EGG AGAIN,
WHICH CAME FIRST …. ROADS
OR DITCHES?) Or underground,
first into square wooden pipes, then
in later years into concrete ones,
sometimes many feet in diameter.
For example, Chedoke Creek runs
underground for seven kilometres
Meeting Review
By Bob Chambers
Members Pages
Page 2 The Probus Club of Burlington Newsletter Www.probusclubofburl ington.ca
Grummett Curling Results
Your Burlington British Pub.
Squires Public House, which harkens
back to an era where a pub became
more than just a place to have a meal,
but a gathering spot to celebrate
friends and family.
Join us after each meeting to continue
fellowship, have a good meal, all for
$15$ including a beer or a glass of
wine.
Signing into our member areas of our
website is now easier with the com-
mon universal sign-in ID and Pass-
word.
Sign-in ID: [email protected]
Password: probus2010
You no longer need to register
your email address or password.
Use the new ID and Password to reg-
ister for events, check the mem-
ber roster, etc.
"The Old Days"
Grandpa was telling his young grand-
son what life was like when he was a
boy.
"In the winter we’d ice skate on our
pond. In the summer we could swim
in the pond, and pick berries in the
woods. We’d swing on an old tire my
dad hung from a tree on a rope. And
we had a pony we rode all over the
farm."
The little boy was amazed, and sat
silently for a minute. Finally he said,
"Granddad, I wish I'd gotten to know
you a lot sooner!"
Three Senior Pals"
Three seniors are out for a stroll.
One of them remarks, “It’s windy.”
Another replies, “No way. It’s Thurs-
day.”
The last one says, “Me too. Let’s have
a soda.”
"Hearing Better Now"
An elderly man was having hearing
problems and went to see a specialist.
The doctor fitted him with some hear-
ing aids that brought his hearing back
to full strength.
After a few weeks the man came back
to make sure the new equipment was
working properly, which it was.
The hearing specialist said, “It all
seems perfect. Your family should be
delighted you can hear everything
now.”
“Oh no,” the man responded. “I have-
n’t told any of them. I just sit quietly,
listening carefully. I’ve changed my
will four times.”
"Hospital Regulations"
Hospital rules state that patients
checking out must have a wheelchair.
One day a newly graduated nurse as-
sistant came into the room to find an
elderly man fully dressed. He was sit-
ting on the bedside chair, with a piece
of packed luggage at his side, all ready
to go.
When he was shown the wheelchair,
he was adamant that he was fully ca-
pable of walking himself to the park-
ing lot.
But the assistant told him rules were
rules, so he relented and let her wheel
him out.
In the elevator, the assistant asked the
elderly man if his wife was coming to
meet him.
“I don’t think so,” he replied. “It takes
her awhile to change her clothes, so
she’s probably still upstairs in the
bathroom taking off of her hospital
gown and getting dressed.”
"Write It Down"
A couple in their nineties are both having
some short term memory loss.
While in for a checkup, the physician says
that physically they’re okay, but since
they’re having trouble remembering
things, they might want to start writing
things down.
Later that evening they’re sitting and
reading, when the husband gets up.
“Would you like anything from the kitch-
en?” he asks.
“Some vanilla ice cream,” his wife replies.
“Okay.”
“Shouldn’t you write it down so you don’t
forget it?” she asks. “Don’t worry, I won’t
forget.”
“Well,” she says. “A few raspberries on
top would be great. You want to write
that down?” “I’ve got it, honey. A bowl of
vanilla ice cream with raspberries on
top.”
“And chocolate sauce, too. Maybe you’ll
forget that. Want me to write it down for
you?” A little miffed, he replies, “I’ve got
it! Ice cream, raspberries and chocolate
sauce. I don’t need it written down, for
gosh sakes!”
He waddles out to the kitchen. A half
hour later, he comes back with a plate of
ham and scrambled eggs, and gives it to
his wife.
She stares at the plate a few seconds,
then says, “You forgot my toast.”
Did You Know?
Members Pages
Page 3 The Probus Club of Burlington Newsletter Www.probusclubofburl ington.ca
Squire
Some Humour
Special Events
Page 4 The Probus Club of Burlington Newsletter Www.probusclubofburl ington.ca
Burlington Probus President's Cup & Interclub Golf Tournament
Date - Friday May 31, 2019
Start - 10:30 am
Place - Burlington Springs Golf Club, 5235 Cedar
Springs Road
Price - $75 - includes golf, cart, prizes & lunch (scramble format)
Payment - Cheque payable to Probus Club of Burlington;
no refunds after May 19
Invited participants - members & guests
Prizes - Low net team, closest to the pin, drive closest to the line, draw
On-line or at April meeting
Prize donations gratefully accepted
Mark your Calendars Foster Festival in
St. Catherines, Ontario
Tuesday, July 11th, 2:00pm
to see
“HILDA’S YARD”
by Norm Foster
Details to follow
Shaw Festival in Niagara
on the Lake, Ontario
Friday, September 27th,
2:00pm
to see
“THE LADYKILLERS”
by Graham Linehan, screen-
play by William Rose
Details to follow
Computer
Interest Group
Our next meeting will be on April 11th at 10am at Appleby Place.
Robert will be reviewing some new developments and answer-ing your questions as well. So please send them to [email protected]
Interest Group Activities
Page 5 Www.probusclubofburlington.ca The Probus Club of Burlington Newsletter
Published monthly by The Probus Club of Burlington, Box 85098, Brant Plaza P.O., Burlington ON, L7R 4K3
President: Ed Eves, 905-637-9644 Editing & Distribution: Bob Lalonde, 905-332-1383.
Probus Bridge Club
The Monday Bridge Group
Meets every week at the Ca-
nadian Legion. Join us for
lunch and friendly games of
bridge Starts at 12 Noon..
The Game"
On an overseas flight, a lawyer and an older man were in adjoining seats.
The lawyer asked the senior if he’d like to play a little game. The older man was tired, and he told the law-yer he only wanted to sleep.
But the lawyer insisted the game was a lot of fun.
“Here’s how it works,” he said. “I’ll ask you a question. If you can’t come up with the answer, you have to give me a dollar. Then it’s your turn to ask me one. But if I can’t answer it, I have to give you $20.”
The senior figured if he just got this over with, maybe he could get some sleep. So he agreed to play.
The first question from the lawyer was “How far apart are the earth and the moon?”
The senior stayed completely silent, reached for a dollar, and gave it to the lawyer. Then he said, “My turn.
What walks upstairs backward and comes downstairs forward?”
The lawyer was stumped. He thought and thought. He tried to remember all the riddles he knew. He searched every corner of his brain.
He even cheated and asked the flight attendants and other passen-gers.
Finally he gave up. He woke up the older man and gave him a twenty. The senior stuffed the twenty in his coat and went immediately back to sleep.
The lawyer couldn’t stand it. He woke up the older man and said, “I have to know. What walks upstairs backward and comes downstairs forward?”
The senior got out his wallet, gave the lawyer a dollar, and went back to sleep.
Oh Boy!
April Humour