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ZP10 Englisch HSA – Lernaufgabe Schreiben
Writing a comment – mobile phones in school Take a look at the following writing task which was part of a former exam: Mobile phones in school
You are in Ireland as an exchange student. The Irish school is thinking about allowing mobile phones at school. A teacher asks you to write about your opinion.
• Write your comment. • Write about all the aspects given below. • Write about 120 words.
No school without mobile phones! Do you agree? In your comment, give your opinion on the use of mobile phones in
school. Include the following aspects:
(1) Describe rules for mobile phone use in a German school
• during lessons and breaks,
• on school trips and day trips.
It can be your school or any other school. (4 Punkte)
(2) Explain why you think mobile phones should or shouldn’t
be allowed in school. Include ideas on the following
aspects:
• learning
• communication
• difficult situations
(6 Punkte)
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Aim of the task
No school without mobile phones! Do you agree?
In the course of this task, you will …
• inform yourself about rules for mobile phone use in two different Irish schools.
Step 1 - 3
• describe rules for mobile phone use in a German school. Step 4
• learn how to give your opinion on the use of mobile phones in school including … … a good structure for your comment, … arguments for / against the issue, … linking words / phrases to make your comment more interesting.
• learn how to proof-read and rewrite your text if necessary.
Step 5
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Step 1 – Read about rules for mobile phone use in Irish schools On the Internet, you have found some information on the use of mobile phones in two different Irish schools. Read how the following Irish schools deal with this issue. Use a dictionary if you need to look up words. Mercy Secondary School, Tuam, Co. Galway1
http://www.mercytuam.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Mobile-Phone-Policy-2018-2019.pdf Code of Behaviour Mobile Phone Policy School Attendance Policy … “It is recommended that students leave their phones at home everyday. Students should note:
• Students in 1st, 2nd and 3rd year who bring a mobile phone onto the premises during school hours, must ensure that the device is turned off and secured in the student’s own locker, which must be padlocked all the times during the school day, including break and lunchtime hours. Transition year, 5th year and Leaving Cert Students are allowed to use their phones during lunch hour.
• Students are advised that should they wish to contact home or be contacted from home then they may ask their year head to use the school phone based in the front office.
• At no point or at any time can a mobile device be used to record video or sound of any other person or event in the school without permission. The school has two digital cameras available for use at school events.
Sanctions for breach of this policy:
• The school assumes that this policy will be adhered to by all students at all times. However, in the rare event where this is not the case, the mobile phone will be confiscated until the end of the school day. Parents will be informed by SMS about the incident and advised of the consequences of this happening again.
• In the event that there is a second breach of this policy during the same academic year then the parents/guardians of the student must collect the mobile phone. They will be informed of this by SMS from the school.
• In all incidents where a phone is confiscated from a student then the student’s Year Head will be informed.”
1 The following text is quoted and taken from the school’s homepage: http://www.mercytuam.com/wp-content/up-
loads/2011/12/Mobile-Phone-Policy-2018-2019.pdf (letzter Zugriff: 04.06.2021)
Worksheet 1a
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St. Brogan’s College, Brandon, Co. Cork2
http://www.sbc.ie/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/Mobile-Phone-Policy1.pdf Uniform Policy Homework Policy Mobile Phone Policy … “Mobile phones and personal music devices are to be turned off and out of sight while in the school building. This includes break times. Students may step outside the building to use mobile phones before 9:00, at small break and lunch break. Failure to follow this directive will result in the device being confiscated and held in the office for collection by a parent/guardian. A student who refuses to surrender the device will be suspended from attending school until such time as he/she agrees to comply with school rules. Parents who need to contact students on urgent matters are free to ring the school landline and speak with their son/daughter. Alternatively a message can be passed to the student. Similarly, students needing to contact parents are free to use the school phone.”
Step 2 – Underline important words and phrases for mobile phone use
Underline important words and phrases for the use of mobile phones in the texts above. Use six different colours for the following categories:
2 The following text is quoted and taken from the school’s homepage: http://www.sbc.ie/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/Mo-
bile-Phone-Policy1.pdf (letzter Zugriff: 04.06.2021)
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places for using one’s mobile at school
times for using one’s mobile at school
possibilities for students to contact home / for parents to contact
school
what is strictly forbidden in terms of mobile phone use
consequences for students if they don’t stick to the school’s mobile phone policy
general rule for keeping one’s mobile at school
Worksheet 1b
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Step 3 – Note down rules for mobile phone use in Irish schools Now note down important rules for the use of mobile phones in both schools and exchange your results with a partner. Make sure to use the words and phrases that you’ve underlined in step 2.
1. Which rules for mobile phone use must Junior and Senior students follow at Mercy Secondary School?
Junior students
Senior students
2. What is strictly forbidden in terms of other persons’ privacy at Mercy Secondary School?
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3. Which consequences must students face at Mercy Secondary School if they don’t stick to
its mobile phone policy? Complete the following sentences. If students don’t stick to the mobile phone rules, __________________________________________________________________________ If students break the rules again, __________________________________________________________________________
4. Which rules for mobile phone use must students follow inside and outside the building at St. Brogan’s College?
inside the building
outside the building
5. What should students do in case they need to contact their parents?
at Mery Secondary School
at St. Brogan’s College
Worksheet 2
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Step 4 – Describe rules for mobile phone use in a German school Now you’ve informed yourself about different rules for mobile phone use at two different Irish schools. Let’s move over to Germany! How about rules for mobile phone use in our country?
1. The following task could be a possible task 1 when writing your English exam. Make sure to write about all the aspects given below and use helpful words and phrases that you’ve underlined in step 2.
2. After that swap texts with a partner to proof-read and revise each other’s texts. Proof-read and rewrite your text if necessary. Use checklist A (see attachment 2).
Worksheet
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Describe rules for mobile phone use in a German school
• during lessons and breaks,
• on school trips and day trips.
It can be your school or any other school.
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Step 5 – Give your opinion on the use of mobiles phones in school The following task could be a possible task 2 when writing your English exam.
1. Think about the structure of a comment
a) Read the following sentences and put them in a suitable order to form a short comment. Show the order by writing the numbers 1 to 10 in front of the sentences.
Finally, you can use your mobile to contact your parents in case when it’s necessary.
People have different views on whether mobile phones should or shouldn’t be allowed in school.
One reason for mobile phones in school is that you can use them in your school lessons.
For example, I often use my mobile to send in homework to my teacher and get some helpful feedback.
1 In many schools today, the use of mobile phones has become a big issue.
For example, you can use a dictionary app in your English class or you can use a calculator app in Maths.
To sum up, there are a lot of situations in school where a mobile phone can be of great help.
I’m of the opinion that it is helpful for students to use their mobile in school.
Another reason is that you can use your mobile to communicate with other students or your teacher.
For example, if you’ve missed the bus or had an accident at school, you can ring them on your mobile.
b) Then examine how the comment is structured using the grid below. Identify the different
parts and write down the sentence numbers on the right.
part sentences
introduction: presenting the issue 1,
opinion: presenting your view
main part: presenting arguments for / against
conclusion: presenting your final statement
c) Underline words and phrases in the sentences above which help to structure the content. d) Finally, exchange results with a partner.
Worksheet
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Explain why you think mobile phones should or shouldn’t be allowed in school.
Include ideas on the following aspects:
• learning
• communication
• difficult situations
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2. Collect arguments about the issue a) Now take a look back at the writing task and note down your own arguments both for and
against the use of mobile phones in school. aspect argument for argument against
learning use learning apps
communication
difficult situations
b) Choose one side of argumentation that clearly reflects your personal opinion. If you don’t
have a clear opinion on the use of mobile phones at school, mark arguments on both sides that you find most important and convincing.
3. Write your comment a) Now over to you! Write your own comment using the worksheet on the next page.
Follow the text structure in ex. 1 and include arguments that you’ve chosen in ex. 2. The following checklist for writing a good comment can help you:
Make sure to include all the relevant parts of a comment ( see grid in ex. 1b)
Start a new paragraph for each part of your comment.
Start a new paragraph for each new argument.
Try to create smooth links between your paragraphs and use linking words / phrases.
Use your results from ex. 1c) again or the word bank in attachment 1.
Present your arguments in a good order.
Illustrate your arguments using examples.
b) After that swap texts with a partner to proof-read and revise each other’s texts. Proof-read and rewrite your text if necessary. Use checklist B (see attachment 2).
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Appendix
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Attachment 1 – How to express one’s opinion Stating one’s opinion
Giving arguments
Students should use mobile phones in school because … One reason for the use of mobile phones in school is that … Another reason is that … Another point is that using mobile phones … It is not a good idea to use mobile phones in school because … One reason against (using) mobile phones is that … A second reason is that … I’m against the use of mobile phones because … Structuring arguments First of all, … Next … In addition to that … Finally, … Giving examples to illustrate your arguments For example, … I know that … It is true that … Recently, … Concluding To sum up, … As a conclusion, … As a result, …
I’m of the opinion that mobile phones should / shouldn’t …
To my mind students should use …
I believe / don’t believe that the use of mobile phones …
I think / don’t think that …
I’m convinced that …
Attachment 1
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Attachment 2 – Proof-reading and revising texts Good writing is always rewriting. After you have written any kind of text, you need to proof-read it. Read through your text intensely and do not only check the language critically, but also look at your text as a whole using the checklists below. After proof-reading, revise your text. Correct all mistakes and rewrite sentences if necessary. Checklist A for text 1 – Describe rules for mobile phone use in a German school
Criteria Evaluation
Check the … spelling
punctuation
grammar (e.g. tenses, irregular verb forms)
word order
use of words
Check if the text …
deals with all aspects mentioned within the task
Check if the text has …
a clear, logical content
a clear sentence structure
a good choice of vocabulary ( see topic)
linking words / phrases
Checklist B for text 2 – Comment on the use of mobile phones in school
Criteria Evaluation
Check the … spelling
punctuation
grammar (e.g. tenses, irregular verb forms)
word order
use of words
Check if the text …
deals with all aspects mentioned within the task
Check if the text …
has a clear, logical content
has a clear sentence structure
has a good choice of vocabulary ( see topic)
has linking words / phrases
keeps to the rules of the chosen type of text ( see checklist for writing a comment in step 5, ex. 3a)
Attachment
2
