Christmas term at Wycombe Abbey: not only is it the longest term in the year, but it also involves mocks, plays, for many of us. But never fear the music team have created a relaxation playlist to help you get through it! Our playlist this month is a mix of genres from Alternative to R&B so listen with an open mind as you relax and unwind.

1. Concrete Wall - Zee Avi 2. Twilight - Vanessa Carlton 3. Coming Down - The Weeknd 4. Everything I Am - Kanye West 5. Baby - Devandra Banhart 6. Nothing Even Matters - Lauryn Hill &

7. Paperweight Joshua Radin 8. Last Kiss - Boyce Avenue ft Megan

and Liz cover 9. Hey There Delilah - Plain White Tees 10. Upward Over The Mountain - Iron

and Wine 11. Day Old Hate - City And Colour 12. Boots and Trains - Stornoway 13. Help The People - Birdy

PLAYLIST OF THE MONTH

Dear Reader, In between eating our bodyweight in custard creams and discussing the latest episode of Made in Chelsea, we have somehow managed to produce that which you now hold in your hands. Here is a collection of the wit and the brilliance of Wycombe Abbey, carefully curated by yours truly. We did this to augment our love of journalism and literature as well as to provide Wycombe with a newspaper run by girls for girls. We aspired to create a publication which you, fellow student, would be proud to contribute to and look forward to reading every so often. Here's The Publication. Enjoy.

EDITOR- IN-CHIEF  Sophie Colfer

EDITORS Ayesha Ahmed Ploy Kingchatchaval Liv Konotey-Ahulu Imogen Marshall Caroline Rundell Arabella Smirnova-Beroskin

DESIGN Romilly Beddow Emily Hoyle Sophia Kosasih

CARTOONIST Georgi Davies

  With Christmas fast approaching, is it any wonder that the familiar festive atmosphere is again present wherever you go?

selling Christmas-related products ever earlier, thrusting us unsuspecting customers into the holiday spirit inappropriately early. This year I found myself wandering into the Wycombe-

and was instantly surrounded by shelves stocked with chocolate calendars. In October. And yet, despite the fact that Christmas is, and has always been, celebrated in late December, there are in fact those who purchase these calendars months in advance. But why? Of all the various celebrations, Christmas is one of the most eagerly awaited. Indeed, this is definitely the case with me. It is, according to Bill Nighy in Love Actually,

surrounding Christmas, perhaps not only

After a long year, you deserve a rest. Christmas brings with it the promise of a (well-deserved) holiday as well as the

equally exciting promise of presents. It is this thrill that we feel as we see the Christmas decorations go up; they evoke images of all that is associated with the glorious 25th. Thus, despite the fact that it is, in fact, early November and there are weeks left to go before the big day, we find ourselves tempted by the allure of Christmas, deceiving ourselves into believing it is much closer than it actually is. And so, we buy those chocolate calendars and those gold Lindt bunnies ridiculously early. Perhaps, one day, someone will put up decorations in mid-summer and there will be no outcry. What difference does a few more weeks of Christmas festivity make? Imagine if you will, the same concept applied to a different holiday. Try celebrating Easter in January

Countdown in November. Fellow Asians, consider celebrating Chinese New Year in December. A month in advance would be classified as being prepared, yet it is when it is more than that that it merely becomes ridiculous. If you start getting ready for Christmas in

you have dedicated to the event.

DOES CHRISTMAS TOO EARLY?

COME AROUND

Sophie Colfer

Did the breakdown of the BlackBerry servers permanently damage RIM?

There was chaos. Across the world, BlackBerry users everywhere descended into a state of panic. Businessmen found important emails weren't sending, friends realised their BBM (the infamous BlackBerry messaging service provided by company Research In Motion) was cut off. Statuses begging for answers never found their way to Facebook newsfeeds. Radio silence swooped down suddenly upon the world. And that was when we knew that the end of the world truly was nigh. honestly? The reality wasn't that far from my (slightly sardonic) version of

down, a good portion of its customers a large number of whom reside at

Wycombe Abbey found themselves unable to access their emails, check Facebook, or use the BlackBerry-defining BBM. Many of you will be familiar with

debate. As a firm believer in the

argument much easier to win with the

disabled. BlackBerry users could no

touch screen and superior Internet with their handy messaging device. The debate that once ended with awkward

omnipotence of Apple, checking Facebook on your clacking BlackBerry keys, and claiming that a few days of disruption on your beloved BlackBerry

those few days and ask yourself: what were you doing? Without your BlackBerry functioning at full capacity, ask yourself what you were reducing to doing without your usually mandatory check-up on the ways of the world displayed on your mobile interface. Twiddling your thumbs? Staring off into space? Crying? My point exactly. And

were unimpressed, either. Influential figures, MPs included, tweeted their displeasure (from their iPhones, no doubt. Ed.) Sir Alan Sugar was at the forefront of the Twitter army, insisting

general frustration at the company has -lowering shares to

drop drastically in value and rumours have circulated that the company may, in fact, have to sell up. occurred at just the right time for Apple, coinciding perfectly with the release of the new iPhone 4S. The crash

share value after the tragic death of Steve Jobs, which had earlier affected the company. So maybe RIM has been permanently damaged. Maybe it will take them a long time to get back on even footing with Apple and their other

the next time this happens, they had better be prepared to do some serious damage control before all BlackBerry users find themselves drawn to the next sleek and more importantly reliable smartphone that Apple next release.

Imogen Glen

Henrietta Boyle

If you should ever walk into one of

restaurants on a Saturday afternoon, you can be assured that you will find a sea of Wycombe girls. Eager to throw off our shackles and seize the four hours of freedom that we are begrudgingly granted,

desperation that only a week spent picking at plates of minted lamb stroganoff can induce. But why do we frequent these three restaurants in particular? chicken burger with extra hot peri-peri sauce and as much Coca-Cola as you can drink concept cannot be beaten in preparing you for a feisty lacrosse match. Although perhaps if we all went to Pizza Express instead and gorged on dough balls the overwhelming whiff of garlic would send the opposition flying without the need to even

also handily situated next to Cineworld which means that when your food finally arrives (the service is not the best, to put it mildly) and you realise that your film started fifteen minutes ago you can grab your food and run, having already paid when you ordered! relatively brief time spent waiting for your meal is a definite bonus, as is the knowledge that your chosen beverage of apple and lime juice is practically God in liquid form.

-up on

order the surprisingly filling

which of course enables you to save some cash for that traditional after-lunch

like? Apart from the communal benches, which occasionally mean you have to engage in painfully awkward small talk with strangers,

But of course the overriding advantage that Noodle Nation has over these two restaurants is the fact that it is by far the closest to school. Why trek to the far end of the Eden Centre when you only have to travel just further than the dodgy underpass for noodles that are far cheaper

also incredibly easy to get a takeaway, which

those school baked potatoes and not be late for your match, all relatively stress-free.

But even if all you want to satisfy your appetite is a quick BLT from M&S, or a

still a long walk from the

going for a closer, cheaper, (though admittedly more

calorific) option in the form of a Happy

Apple and lime juice is

practically God in liquid form.  

Forget the Dalai Lama and Kim Kardashian. Here are the people you really want to be clogging up your Twitter feeds. @YourAuntDiane In their own words:

myself. Come by my kiosk at the Santa Fe -for-1 on Nepalese

earrings! About: A Twitter parody account of a legume-loving hippie child grown up, Aunt Diane

generally too busy reading books about the history of the bean, adopting abused birds and being funny on Twitter to successfully sell her umbilical-cord necklaces. Memorable tweets:

whiskers with gluten-free minestrone. It's

inside the ground, and go in there to yawn.

bath by sitting on a piece of driftwood as

but they were just on top of my

TWITTER PEOPLE

@Queen_UK In their own words: Queen, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith, wife to the DoE. About:

monarch hat on? Well, look no further than this spoof account of our favourite ruler. She banters with other world

at you, Berlusconi), takes regular (vaguely alcoholic) refreshment breaks, and refers

to worship? Long live the Queen indeed. Memorable tweets:

Denmark today as part of a charm offensive to drum up votes ahead of next

punch, first of the month and no returns".

Toblerone in duty free"

@Dumblebrag In their own words: I'm the Headmaster at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite that fact, it's still a great school. About: A collection of humblebrags written from the wand of the mighty Albus Percival

humblebrag is (shame on you), let the Bible of All Things Good Ever Urban Dictionary enlighten you: Humblebrag: Subtly letting others now about how fantastic your life is while undercutting it with a bit of self-effacing humor or "woe is me" gloss. So a collection of those, but more magical. Prepare to feel hopelessly inadequate, Muggle. Memorable tweets:

Probably why I turned down those offers

marriage proposals? Sorry, ladies, wrong

Yes, I am friends with "The Boy Who Lived". I wish he tried harder to be "The

YOU SHOULD  

ON FOLLOWING BE  Ploy Kingchatchaval

of The High Wycombe

  Unprecedented depth of knowledge was displayed by the two teams who battled it out in the inaugural Wycombe Abbey Staff University Challenge. The event, presented

with the sizeable audience of sugar-high Wycombe Abbey girls (Krispy Kreme were sponsoring the event it seemed). The teams were as follows:

-Be-Tamedbridge: Miss Wallace, Dr. Moodie, Miss Geussens & Mr Franks Rocks-My-Socksford: Dr. Tullis, Dr. Wallwork, Mr Ledingham & Mrs Sutcliffe On paper the teams look well-matched, but it seemed that a whitewash was on the cards as Tamedbridge took an early lead by 70 points thanks to some worryingly accurate Doctor Who trivia

from Miss Geussens and a round of quickfire answers on brands of sweets from Miss Wallace. However, following an abysmal round on the collective nouns of birds, newcomer Miss Sutcliffe wowed us with a most spectacular display of Justin Bieber and Made in Chelsea knowledge - Justin Bieber's favourite colour is purple, just in case you didn't know - and Socksford narrowly took the lead 225 to 195. As the show went on, the voice and diction of Mr Evans the Quizmaster began to waver (far too modest, Mr E.! Ed.) in anticipation of such a closely-fought battle and the audience found themselves lending a hand, singing Bieber lyrics and chanting

down to a fast-paced flurry of brainbusting starter and bonus questions, Mr Ledingham offered us a glimpse into his extracurricular

interests by answering confidently on Rebecca Black and Christian the Lion, Dr Wallwork showed off his extra-sensory abilities at mental arithmetic - although Miss Wallace did pip him to the post in a geometry round! - and Dr Tullis impressed us all by knowing what DNA stood for well, she is a doctor, after all. Sadly, Dr Moodie's highly detailed and shockingly passionate Friends

breathtaking speed on the buzzer and Miss Geussens' encyclopaedic familiarity of the

mighty efforts were blown away and

345. An excellent evening was had by all. Rumours are already flying about a

STAFFUNIVERSITY CHALLENGE Dan Evans

?

? Did you know:

A marshmallow hitting the

Earth at the speed of light

would cause an explosion equal

in energy to the power of a

few dozen hydrogen bombs.

sfumato tonal modelling,

quartz crystal

Neutrinos may travel faster than the speed of light. Well potentially anyway, providing another experiment can confirm the extraordinary results released by the OPERA (Oscillation Project with Emulsion-Tracking Apparatus) team on the 27th September. It is the most dramatic scientific announcement for a generation, contradicting our current understanding of the physical universe. Why? Because 15000 neutrinos made phenomenally fast journeys from the renowned European Organization for Nuclear Research (best known as

laboratory in the heart of Gran Sasso mountain in central Italy. And, boy, did the neutrinos travel

just over two thousandths of one per cent

laws of physics allow. Indeed, the results contradict the reasoning of the greatest physicist of all time: Albert Einstein. In his miracle year of 1905, Einstein (then a young clerk working at the Swiss patent office in Bern and, astoundingly, unknown to the scientific community) released four papers, any one of which would have caused a sensation in its own right. Working alone led him to consider things no one else had ever dreamed of before. In those papers he positively abandoned scientific rigmarole; indeed he did not even include one

was a burst of scientific creativity unparalleled in human history. Central to his third paper was the most famous equation of all time: E = mc 2. This equation states that energy (E) is equal to mass (m) multiplied by the speed

genius was to suggest that the speed of light was a constant. A constant is something that will remain the same no matter what the circumstances; therefore no matter where you are in the universe or how you measure it, the speed of light will always be the same. The speed of the light coming from a torch will be the same if I shine it whilst travelling in a car, or whizzing along in a space ship. This is pretty counterintuitive and led Einstein to an even weirder conclusion. According to the equation E = mc 2, if light is a constant (i.e. always the same), then it follows that increasing the energy of the object also

speed increases its energy, thus the more the object accelerates the more mass it will gain and the more energy it will need to make it accelerate. This continues so that when the object reaches the speed of

to be infinite, and so it will need an infinite amount of energy to accelerate to this speed. possess infinite energy. So, Einstein concluded, the speed of light must be the speed limit of the universe, and that nothing with mass could travel faster than it. However, recently the OPERA team claim that their neutrinos did. They claim that the neutrinos they were experimenting on travelled faster than the speed of light, something that (as they have a small mass) they should not be able to do. Nonetheless, if any particle were going to break the rules, it would be the

physics, is one of the strangest and least understood particles in the universe. They are infamously difficult to detect. Although there are far many more neutrinos whizzing into the OPERA detector than there are atoms, the detector only detects an average of 30 neutrinos a day. This is because matter is mostly just empty space, thus neutrinos, being small and uncharged particles can pass through the detector without affecting it. Indeed, neutrinos are so difficult to detect that their detection was only achieved twenty years after their existence was first theorised by Wolfgang Pauli. Since then the OPERA team has perfected the technique. First the OPERA team had to create some neutrinos. For help with this they turned to the world famous research organisation CERN. The scientists at CERN started by generating a beam of protons, which they accelerated around

that the proton beam was passed into the super proton synchrotron to accelerate them even faster. The resulting high-energy beam of protons was then slammed into a graphite target, producing a cocktail of exotic subatomic particles including neutrinos. Able to pass through matter unaffected, the neutrinos then flew of through the earth in the direction of

awaited them. Neutrinos are detected when they collide with the nuclei of the atoms in a detector. This produces a charged particle that is detected as a tiny flash of light.

has a high density and this increases the likelihood of the neutrinos hitting the nuclei and thus being detected. The researchers themselves were pretty shocked by the results. They spent many months looking for errors, buying in outside experts, and pouring over the

mistakes. So they decided to publish, not in a triumphant manner, but to ask the scientific community to help them to understand this unprecedented finding. When the OPERA team presented the results of their research at CERN, they were overwhelmingly praised for their painstaking efforts to make their experiment as accurate as possible. The maximum error they allowed for the calculation of the distance between CERN and OPERA for example was only 20cm;

factored in the movement of the continents that changes the distance between Switzerland and Italy by small amounts every year! So while keeping an open but

of so much current research!) physicists have already started to entertain themselves with the implications of the results if they were to be verified. At stake could be the greatest

uncompleted mission: a grand theory of everything. Newtonian physics works very

suggest that there is a limit to what

we are ready for the next branch of physics to further our knowledge of the universe. For the OPERA results may be the first proof of string theory, a radical method of thinking about the universe rooted in highly complex mathematics. String theorists suggest that the fundamental particles we see in the universe are all related to each other

are no individual particles but only a single string, and that each note on this string represents a different elementary particle. The mathematical conclusion of string theory is that the universe needs 6 more dimensions than the four we are used to (counting time as the fourth dimension), and that these extra dimensions are all curled up to such a small size that they are unobservable. According to string theory, these dimensions are essentially other universes. It is in these other universes that these strings vibrate.So, the neutrinos could have left CERN travelling just faster than the speed of light in our universe, and then have taken a short-cut through the other universes and arrived back in our own in time to be picked up at Gran Sasso. It will be a year before another team can verify the results. If they too suggest that neutrinos can travel faster than the speed of light, then we are faced with tearing up all our textbooks and

admit, seeing the universe as the ringing of many harmonies has its charm.

one giant leap for mankind Alice Garner

 

I have just watched the final episode of the current series of Downton Abbey, and have enjoyed it hugely, despite or because of its outrageous melodrama. But what has really struck me this term is how often I have referred to it in lessons. Discussing the fiery politics of Ireland with my Lower Sixth, whilst reading Yeats's 'September 1913', I found myself alluding to the episode where the Irish chauffeur at Downton launches an attack at the dinner table on a visiting army officer who brutally suppressed an

DOWNTON Irish rebellion in Dublin. Asked by an Upper Four about when people first had telephones, I remembered the butler at Downton gingerly answering the new-fangled phone in 1912. Starting to read An Inspector Calls with my Lower Fours, we came across J B Priestley's ironic reference to the 'unsinkable' Titanic and we remembered the drowning of the heir to Downton Abbey which begins the whole soap opera. Hotly debating how class-structured English society is, whilst reading Blood Brothers, the Upper Fours thought back to the pre-1914 days when Downton was a microcosm of the English class system. Reading Journey's End and Wilfred Owen's war poetry in the Upper Five reminded us of the fate of army cowards (Downton cook's nephew shot for cowardice), of those who sought 'Blighty' wounds to escape from the hell of the

trenches (footman Thomas) and of the tragic deaths of young men who so willingly and bravely volunteered to go 'up the line to death' (Downton manservant William). When Downton Abbey hero Matthew was wounded in the back, we couldn't help thinking of the horrific back injury sustained by Raleigh in Journey's End. Well-informed History GCSE students were, however, quick to tell me that there were many inaccuracies in the television portrayal of conditions in the trenches! A marvellous review in The Guardian poked fun at the way in which hero Matthew seemed to be home on leave so frequently, calling him a 'weekly boarder' in the trenches! Writing this on a Sunday evening, I feel an awful void where Downton Abbey used to be. Will Mary and Matthew ever get together? What will be the fate of the ghastly, smug Bates? Roll on the Christmas special and many more classroom discussions.  

WYCOMBE  Clare Addison

ABBEY  ABBEY  

Jacqueline du Pre was a British cellist who lived from 1945 and 1987. A critically-acclaimed cellist

rallying with Yo Yo Ma, she is most famous for her She was

forced to stop performing at the age of 28 because she attained Multiple Sclerosis, a disease where she

started to lose sensitivity in her fingers and other parts in her body. She moved on to teach

the cello and as a matter of fact taught our cello teacher at Wycombe Abbey, Mrs Harries.

We are privileged to have a cello teacher taught by the famous Jacqueline

du Pre.

JACQUELINE DU PRE

At the age of 68,

cataracts were detected in the eyes of the famous impressionist painter

Claude Monet, resulting in the loss of his sight in his left eye and the distorted perception of

actually incorporated this change in his vision in his work. The colours he used became darker and more vibrant and images began to look less realistic, his brush strokes more

to look at what the universe showed me, to let my brush

more and more abnormal, this translated into his artwork. If you look at the paintings of his house seen from his rose

garden, painted between 1922-4, the effects of his faltering eyesight are evident, and in fact

makes for the use of fascinating and beautiful colours.

MOVEMBER By Craig Einstein

The American School of Dubai

In the month of November, many men around the world choose not to shave to raise awareness

for prostate cancer. The hair grown is used as symbol for prostate cancer awareness, just as the

pink ribbon is used for breast cancer awareness. The rules of 'No Shave November' are straightforward - simply do not shave during the month of November.

For all you ladies reading this, this works nicely - don't think we don't know the real reason you

wear tights in the winter...

For more information visit www.movember.com

DINNER PARTY CONVERSATIONS

Titbits of knowledge that will ensure your utmost

competence at the hands of dinner-party guests.

MONET

OF  DEFENCE  IN  CAPITALISM

OF  DEFENCE  IN  CAPITALISM

OF  DEFENCE  IN  CAPITALISM

every day about greedy corporations, the wealthy despised 1% who in the United States pay over 45% of all federal taxes and are set to pay more, and the Wall Street (or similar) traders who are somehow responsible for all their problems, it makes me wonder why those with money are never allowed a

competitiveness, have been able to produce goods efficiently and cost-effectively enough that 34% of poor Americans not middle-class, not average, but those deemed poor own video-game consoles. It would not surprise me that figures in the UK are similar. Capitalism does not mean that anyone struggling is left to rot; people such as John D. Rockefeller, one of the richest people in history allowing for inflation, conduct great acts of philanthropy. Bill Gates, for instance, sponsors an AIDS initiative in Africa. It is not about selfishness; it is about enabling people to help themselves, rather than simply handing it to them.

who creates jobs? That would be the corporations, the small business owners

their own, are in higher tax brackets) and that 1% who hire people to do their gardening, cleaning, plumbing, electrical repairs, and other services, as well as buying more goods and thus putting money into the economy. It makes logical

sense that a business with more money is very likely to expand the company, set up more branches, and hire more people. Therefore, if we want to create jobs, we should give these aforementioned businesses a tax break. (Even if they do not hire more workers, it is likely that the extra money will be invested in the business to generate more income, which is of course taxed, and also improves the economy.) So to summarise: if we cut corporate and business tax, although we may have to cut benefits, it also means that more people will be working, so

benefits. Another benefit of reducing taxes, particularly corporate tax, is that it is an incentive for companies to establish bases and even headquarters in the nation. No sane corporation will choose to operate out of a country where they have to pay far more in taxes than, for instance, in Geneva or Dubai, if their market is still accessible. And what happens when businesses are started and production increases? The economy improves. More people are hired. Fewer people need to be supported by taxpayers. No one, not even capitalists, wants to deprive children, the elderly, the chronically ill or disabled, single parents, or those who have lost their jobs, of support. There does need to be a safety net for those who really need it. But a culture where welfare benefits are provided to so many who could be

working productively if potential employers had the money to hire them can generate a situation like that of this summer: many unemployed young people on public assistance who are bored and unfulfilled, and want more out of jealousy of those who pay their benefits. The riots this summer could possibly have been avoided if this demographic had had access to work and opportunities. So, in a good working capitalist economy, jobs are easily accessible if you try hard enough, the education system provides opportunities for people to hone their unique talents, the economy grows, and those who are genuinely unable to support themselves are provided for. When the principles are successfully applied, the difference is that people have to work for their income, instead of simply having it given to them. There is still wage inequality, but goods are cheaper and people earn enough to support themselves, and can earn more if they take risks, try harder or learn new skills thus those who earn more are those who make the greater effort and do the best work. Even now, the

investors and traders coming to work at 9 or leaving at 5 or 6 those richer people arrive at work from 6 a.m. and leave at 7 or 8 at night. They more than earn what they have, and when they can keep more of it they will probably hire more secretaries, travel agents, interior decorators, and will buy more clothes, devices, and appliances -- creating jobs and stimulating the economy. Capitalism makes sense to me.

Scarlett Koller

WHO: RAFFAELLA LOBB WHEN: 11TH JUNE 2011 HOW: POLAROID & CANON EOS 500D

Colonialism in Africa can be seen to have left an economic void. States which were former colonies faced numerous problems after their liberation, such as the secession of Katanga in the Congo and the ensuing civil war. The West therefore felt an obligation to give aid to Africa in the form of programs, donations to UN resolutions helping Africa and sometimes contributing to infrastructure. Now that China is on a quest for global dominance, the West almost feels left behind and undercut. The economist and author Arvind Subramanian writes in his article in the Foreign Affairs Journal, 'The Inevitable Superpower dominance is a sure thing', that economic dominance is a combination of three key factors: 'a country's GDP, its trade and the extent to which it is a net creditor to the rest of the world'. Well, the fact is that most Western states economy can satisfy this criterion to a good standard. However, China still continues to oust the west on a global stage. You see, the difference between the West and China in their involvement in Africa is how willing they are to ensure an outcome out of their relationship. In the past, the West has given but were uninterested in the outcome as long as they maintained their strategic geopolitical position. The West's attitude - simply giving money and not monitoring it - has caused disparity between the actual cause being given to and the destination of monetary aid. A prime example of this would be in Congo where, as stated by Dambisa Moyo in her book Dead Aid, Western states and their representative of the IMF gave money to the Congo, but this monetary aid did not actually benefit Congo: instead, it increased the size of

China provides a different style of aid to African states. Firstly, it is necessary to state that in most instances, this is a normal trade relationship and China does not exploit African resources in return for aid with the exception of Angola. Most Chinese businesses are conducted through loans from the African Development Bank. While business tenders in Africa are still open to other international companies, China still wins the business contracts for one main reason. African states simply want to conduct business: they want business without the ideologies they would be forced to accept with US business contracts. Africans are most satisfied with the speed and quality of Chinese infrastructure. China has managed to finish off infrastructure abandoned by Western and local companies alike. This is especially

evident in states where contracts in the past have been awarded to local contractors who end up doing a shoddy job and disappearing with half of the money allocated to the government. China have been seen to have a heavy presence in Kenya working on the Thika highway and in Ethiopia working on the Omo Dam. However, it can be argued that to some extent, China influences ideologies in order to profit its trade links. Subramanian writes: 'China convinced African countries to close down the Taiwanese embassies they were hosting'. China obviously did this to oust any competition from Taiwan. Perhaps in the future, China will want more out of Africa. Moreover, China has been accused of neo-colonialism and exploiting African states such as Angola and Zambia. The relationship with Angola can be seen as neo-colonial as their system of governance is weak, and the Chinese may use their position to get Angola to do what they want. The West have also criticised China for getting involved in states which have not complied with international human rights standards or where there is no system of governance as seen in the Beijing

dealing in order to consolidate relationships with African leaders has also been raised. Thus, it can be argued that China may endanger democracy in Africa and the willingness of African states to declare their oil-books. As always, Africa will be a paradoxical land. They have innumerable resources yet they cannot use them. In Congo, their zinc is mined and sold back to them in batteries. In Angola, the Chinese give out low cost loans as a product of civil war after liberation, and these are then repaid in oil. Most African nations are in the same position: they wonder whether to carry out more business with China or to be under the grasp of the US. In addition,

own resources due to the lack of infrastructure. Therefore, we can only hope and wait until their relationship with China improves their infrastructure and only then will they be able to make significant progress with their own industries. China is interested in the effect their aid will have on the long-term development of Africa, and they hope that African states will become more lucrative

even if it seems that, in reality, China are doing this for their own gains, the fact is that African states will reap benefits from Sino-African relations.

RELATIONSHIP AND EXPLAINS WHY CHINA'S RELATIONSHIP

WITH AFRICA IS MORE

SUCCESSFUL THAN THE WESTERN APPROACH.

MUKAMI KURIA DEMYSTIF IES

THE

CHINA

AFRI

CA

 AVA DAVIES

Directed by Tomas Alfredson a spy film without guns, car chases or wry quips would be the one of the most pretentious pieces of cinema this year. In some respects, you would be right. Dark, subdued and astonishingly slow-paced,

novel is certainly not for everyone. But, however affected you might find it, there is no doubt that this film is exceedingly well made, with an ensemble of British

actors at the top of their game. Particular mentions must go to Tomas Alfredson, a Swedish director best known for the 2008 vampire film,

to create a cold, collected film that thrives off paranoia and pages of lengthy dialogue that could bog a lesser director down. In comparison to the flashy stunts of more commercial films today, the film exudes sheer class. This difference is also due to the

extraordinary company of actors, each of whom plays their part with depth and sensitivity. Regardless of how much screen time they receive, each actor subtly brings to life characters that could, in less capable hands, seem more one-dimensional. Gary Oldman is as eerily still as George Smiley in a role that does not require excess dialogue, while Colin Firth balances smarminess and sensitivity in a crucial role. Mark Strong, Benedict Cumberbatch and Tom Hardy also show

       

        T INKER TAILOR SOLDIER SPY  

 

 ALEX ELDREGE

Directed by Lynne Ramsay My rating: 5 stars based on Lionel Shriver's book, tells the story of a young teenager, Kevin (Ezra Miller), who goes on a wild murderous rampage at his school. Kevin is not your typical killer: his weapon of choice is a bow and arrow, not the stereotypical gun. Director Lynne Ramsay depicts this haunting story through the eyes of Eva (Tilda Swinton), Kevin's mother. Through the use of flashbacks and extracts

from Kevin's childhood, we are gradually told of Kevin's devilish nature and striking intellect which he uses to construct plans to later commit the brutal massacre. Ramsay's gradual release of information throughout the film allows us to draw our own opinion on Kevin, his mother and their relationship. This harrowing film is in many respects a thriller as there is a strong element of suspense. Ramsay's latest effort explores whether a person's character is determined

aftermath of the massacre and how those affected by it try to cope. Ramsay shows how Kevin's mother is ostracised as she struggles to go out in public in fear of being recognised. The community is polarised: some feel pity towards the mother, some feel hatred. At one point, we see Eva being assaulted. Sirens and a vivid red colour are reoccurring symbols throughout the film, representing the

     

 

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KEVIN  

  Cheating on a loved one is never morally acceptable. However, before we crucify Millie, we need to consider a number of arguments. Firstly, were Millie and Hugo actually in love? At the close of Series 1 we see Hugo finally form a relationship with Millie as a clear second choice after being rejected by the odious Rosie. Is this the firm foundation of a mutually respectful relationship? Consequently, with full knowledge of

insecure in her relationship. With Hugo then proceeding to act nonchalant and

opinion, is far greater a crime. As is the problem with reality television, the portrayal presented to the audience was most unfair. In the dramatic

did not stand a chance. Whereas Hugo had

work to reason, justify and form a coherent argument, Millie was pounced upon without any time to form her defence. If a man turned up at my place of work for such an altercation, I would have him removed immediately. Hugo obviously does not

In a community where the boys have jobs in banking and diamond dealing, and where the women are singer-songwriters and make-imbalances exist. The women of Made in Chelsea need to be liberated. They must revolt against the constraints of the suffocating patriarchal society in which they live. Or perhaps what the boys of Chelsea need to comprehend is that if you insist upon playing the role of the patriarch, you need to look after your women, not just abuse your power.

MILLIE v.  HUGO  

A Feminist Perspective Anon

failing to display full commitment to the relationship, as soon as Millie was offered the attention she craved, and indeed deserved, she fell into the arms of a mystery man after Ibiza. If one is in a relationship where the other party constantly checks out other women and behaves like they are single, this behaviour is not really surprising. However, if like Hugo, your other half shows no signs at all of being anything other than smitten with you, showers you with thoughtful

the picture frame with the poem on it cute?) and dotes on your every word, cheating on her is an ultimate sign of disrespect and arrogance.

infidelities lie in the fact that Millie cheated out of loneliness and abandonment, whereas Hugo cheated to boast his dominance. Additionally, Millie cheated on Hugo with a stranger, whereas according to Cheska, Hugo cheated on Millie with someone they all know (possible revelation to come later in the series?) which, in my

The women of Made in

Chelsea need to be liberated.

CONCERT REVIEW  

 

controlled capability in their smaller roles; Strong is particularly good in a later, distressing scene and Cumberbatch pulls off a quiet role with nuanced grace and subtlety. Much attention must be drawn to the superb lighting. The film manages to encapsulate a dreary London, which, due to Alfredson, seems classic and refined. There are no gaudy colours here; the lighting is subdued and restrained throughout the entire film, even when

the action shifts from London to Turkey. At this point, the lighting remains soft, but the hazy yellows of Turkey contrast

Certainly, the monochrome colour scheme fits in well with the general atmosphere of the film. However, regardless of how well made a film is, there is always the possibility that it might alienate audiences.

numerous plot points, faceless threats and sinister characters do run the risk of confusing the viewer. Additionally, the film is slow-paced and ponderous, so one does have to sit and concentrate in order to make some sense of the plot. Nevertheless, although at times confusing and infuriatingly slow-moving,

and has the impact of the viewer leaving the cinema feeling both intellectually and culturally inspired.

     

       

 

 

bloodshed and devastation which haunts Kevin's mother. This well-directed film is thought-provoking as it explores the delicate nature of relationship between a teenage son and his mother. The two instances we see Kevin and Eva 'bond' both occur when Kevin is at his most vulnerable. These are striking examples of how even the most outwardly evil people have times

seeing.

 

 

On Saturday the 29th October, the band Arctic Monkeys performed the second gig of their England tour by performing at the O2 Arena in London, with support from The Vaccines. They played two tracks exclusively for the British crowds: Evil Twin, the new B-side for the single Suck it and See, and Dance Little Liar, a popular number from their third album, Humbug. Miles Kane, former collaboration artist with frontman Alex Turner, made an unexpected appearance for the final song of the evening, 505, to play the guitar solo for the band. Arctic Monkeys continue the tour at venues

including the LG Arena and the Echo Arena. It was an evening thoroughly enjoyed by all those lucky enough to get tickets, especially as the event may have been the last chance to catch them live for a while. Indeed Alex Turner

of yet there is no plan to return to the studio next year, we're keeping our

be returning to the studio until 2013, fans can still look forward to the DVD of their performance at the Don Valley Bowl in their hometown, Sheffield.

ARCTIC MONKEYS Anon

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You must never underestimate the power of the eyebrow. Jack Black

Sylvia Plath is a no-brainer favourite for your typical angsty individual. From the dip-dyed teenage girl on the Tube clutching a battered copy of The Bell Jar to the self-styled literary scholar musing over her contribution to the confessional poetry genre, everyone

so, like, deep.With her artwork on display to the public for the first, and probably last time, this is your chance to propers connect with her work.

While the ins-and-outs of Sylvia

darkly emotional poetry, journals and letters, her art seems devoid of the turbulence we know she experienced. Frieda Plath, her daughter and custodian of

mother taking drawing lessons. She was serious about her art, and it shows: her work is precise, conscientious and surprisingly playful. Her various subjects conkers, streets of Paris, a Curious French Cat are depicted in ink on yellowing paper. Although her art lacks the emotional

works, there is something haunting about the simplicity of it all. Subtle depth and context is suggested: her drawing of a pair of shoes, titled The Bell Jar, brings to mind a

I had removed my patent leather shoes after a while, for they foundered badly in the sand. It pleased me to think they would be perched there on a silver log pointing out to sea, like a sort of soul-

Try to find the deeper meaning

on over to the Mayor Gallery to see her work in person. Dip dye and Moleskine notebook optional: although we do recommend Manic Panic hair dye in Atomic Turquoise. The Mayor Gallery 22A Cork Street, London To 16 December (020 7734 3558)

SYLVIA PLATH AT THE MAYOR GALLERY Ploy Kingchatchava l

And I know that's very popular out there in Africa. Britney Spears

There are many out there who, when given a book in class or by some distant relative at Christmas, will immediately put it away, never to be seen let alone read again. But this is not the case with Twilight. All over the world, children, teens and even adults have picked up a copy of this epic vampire romance and fallen for the supernatural world Stephenie Meyer has created or more specifically, for her two teen heartthrobs Edward and Jacob. But even with such an adoring and occasionally obsessive fanbase you must remember that girls have broken up with their boyfriends in favour of their paperback idol Edward Cullen there are people who are less than fond of Twilight. Despite the fact that it is a literary sensation that has broken the record for the time taken to sell a million copies, some people have not yet found a place in their hearts for Jacob Black: although Taylor

Jacob in the Twilight films has undoubtedly converted some to Twihardism. The common accusation that the standard of grammar, spelling and basic punctuation in the books is too low for it to be treated as an iconic and

revered series is fair but irrelevant. While admittedly the books are not of a standard befitting an English Literature A-Level, the absorbing, fast-

paced, highly thrilling tale spanning over four bestsellers do

(extremely high) standards in order to be what some believe is the best saga ever written. Indeed, some argue that the story is overdone and unoriginal. But is this such a bad thing? This overdone and unoriginal story has managed to spark a newfound love for reading in teenagers that has not been seen since the debut of the beloved Harry Potter series. The Twilight series have led the way for a whole new craze in darker fiction for teens: indeed, the dark romance shelves in

tripled in size. It may not be the most mentally-enriching novel,

that gets teenagers excited about reading is a good one. So I say to all you Twilight haters: embrace the madness. Embrace the bad grammar and

better-written novels out there yes, there are the classics, but

Twilight for the intellectual benefits. You read it because you can lose yourself in the fantasy and the romance. You read it because every time you pick it up, it is the start of a

I might sound slightly crazed when I say this, but I think that JK Rowling the billionaire behind the Harry Potter books should be knighted. I mean, if Bruce Forsyth deserves a knighthood, she definitely does. If the fact that her beloved Harry Potter has dominated the entirety of the 21st century through practically every medium possible, from a film franchise to the almighty

enough, then surely the fact that she is the Ambassador of the One Parent Families charity clinches it. She also published two spin offs of the Harry Potter books for Comic Relief 2011, which has since earned $30 million. She also co-High Level Group in 2005, which has since been re-named Lumos in a witty reference to the light-giving spell used in Harry Potter. She has also united a whole community of people thanks to HP. Take MuggleNet for instance: an entire website devoted to the wanderings of Potter-obsessed minds, or Pottermore, the latest development in the Potter

empire. It is estimated that 400 million copies of the seven Harry Potter books have been sold, which means that if you divide this number by 7, the resulting figure is how many people have bought the series. (I think.) This means 57,142,857 people have bought all 7 books each. A community of nearly 60 million people have read the whole series.

However, as in any well-rounded argument, you have to consider the opposition.

Admittedly she did have the cruelty of heart to kill off, not only the lovable headmaster,

godfather and the main

cheerfully funny brother, all in a three book time span, but Dobby the house-elf, an incident that I never truly recovered from. (Moment of silence for Dobby the free elf, please. Ed.) But really. So

armour, is that really reason

get her knighted already. with myself, the main reason

hoping that, by some miracle,

onto Pottermore early.

WHY SHOULD

LIKE, ACTUALLY. BE KNIGHTED

Honor Brocklebank-Fowler

I mean, if Bruce Forsyth

deserves a knighthood,

she definitely does.

DEFENDING TWILIGHT

Imogen Glen

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT YOSOLA IBITOYE

On the faces of those surrounding Inescapable.

Cradled like a child Nurtured by your dreams It slowly grows, Nothing but a feeling nestled deep inside It patiently bides time unaware of its beauty.

It flutters from deep within Like a dream once forgotten;

With the speed it hits you.

The first few moments are spent in the sky Never noticing the disapproving stares.

And they know the aftertaste well.

It hits you with a bang Crushing you instantly Leaving you gasping for air Not understanding its motive.

No one to wipe your tears To tell you what could have been To pick up the pieces of your broken spirit.

No words to express Your anguish. You watch it fly away untouched.

Searching for new prey Wishing to never see it again. The butterfly of hope Nothing more than zest A zestful bittersweet flavour.

IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME

 We stand up and turn around.

And my heart sinks to the ground As the bride walks into the church.

She wears a cheap, tarty thing

On her hand glitters a rock of a ring, And on her face is a stupid smile.

I watch his face glow alight, And his eyes crinkle at the sides. No no! This is not right! It should have been me.

Oh, yes, it should have been me. Walking down that aisle

Not her, with her fake hair And lack of class, Just look at what she wears! You should be getting married to me.

For months my heart bled While he picked up that tart.

The whispers are spreading As he moves towards me.

He gazes into my eyes And holds my hand From my seat I rise While he opens his mouth and says -

I look at the waitress in front of me Realising as I sway

It should have been me today.

FLORENCE CHAFFEY