Spring Performance In Motion 2010

Canadian Publications Mail Product Sales Agreement #40609642Vol.10 #1 • SPRING 2010 • 25c

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Call Toll-Free: 1-877-471-6700

SPRING 2010 • PiM • 3

10

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Performance in Motion 1100 The QueenswayToronto, ON M8Z 1P7Phone: 416-259-3678 Fax: 416-259-6433

EDITOR/PUBLISHERBob [email protected]

PRODUCTION DESIGNRob McJannett

CONTRIBUTORS Thomas AndersonDale Boeru Bruce BieglerMike GoodwinBill MehlenbacherRobert MichaelsonTim MillerRob PotterJeff SimekBrad Turk Leonard F. SlyePaul SontropShelbyAutos.comwith Bonnie Staring as the Reluctant Passenger

PROOFREADERSpike “The Machine” LaVigne

Are you Moving? Let us know, email us at: [email protected]

PUBLICATIONS MAIL AGREEMENT NO. 40609642 • PERFORMANCE IN MOTION is published four times a year: Spring, Summer, Fall, and Winter. Circula-tion is 30,000+ (ISSN 1703-8421)

Copyright ©2010 All rights reserved by Perfor-mance In Motion Publishing. The fine print: We respect your privacy, and do not sell our mailing list. All opinions are those of the usual gang of idi-ots, most of whom sniff gas fumes. The informa-tion presented is via said gas sniffers, from which there can be no responsibility by the Publishers as to legality, completeness or accuracy. Recycle this magazine - give it to your friends. If you enjoy our magazine, be sure to let us know! This maga-zine may not be reprinted without permission of Performance In Motion Publishing. (We’re nice guys, just ask) • Thanks for everything Mr. D •

None of this would have been possible without you. •

Table of ContentsEditorial ............................................................5Power Wagon ...................................................6Pro Modified Racing Association ................10Quick 32 Sportsman Series ..........................132010 Canadian International Autoshow ....16Shelby Gala & Display ..................................20The Daytona 500 Experience ......................24Targa Newfoundland ....................................26Times have Changed ...................................34E-Z Install ........................................................38Product Showcase ........................................40Product Showcase ........................................42Directory Ads .................................................44Reluctant Passenger .....................................46

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I get loads of interesting stuff in my email, sometimes it’s a joke, and other times some type of hoax.

In fact, the one I am going to tell you about today, I was sure was a hoax. If not a hoax at least it was a huge exag-geration.

Recently I received an email that started out: “Importing causes the most pollution – not race cars, not performance cars, not pickup trucks.” Well that first sentence tweaked my curiosity, as a dyed in the wool car nut, tired of all the ills of the world being blamed on my beloved car, I read on.

The premise is that a single con-tainer ship sailing across the world’s oceans produces the same amount of cancer and asthma-causing air pol-lution as 50 million cars! In fact they claimed the 15 largest container ships would emit as much pollution as all the world’s cars! Yes “all the world’s cars!” If that fact wasn’t stunning enough, in the same report they noted there were 90,000 cargo ships plying the world’s oceans. Do that math!

Once I digested this, I decided to do a little further research, it still sounded too far fetched for me. After a while I discovered the source of most of the material in the email I had received. There was an article written in the The Guardian, one of Great Britain’s most influential newspapers in April of 2009 describing the pollution levels of container ships and pointing out that emission regulations were virtually non existent. To make matters worse these ships burn “bunker fuel”, kind of the lowest common denominator of fuel. Said to be simply a step above as-phalt. It was described as the stuff left over when diesel fuel was made and is

so dirty it cannot be used on land any-where. Read really dirty!

If you find this information fasci-nating, perhaps asking yourself why the world’s politicians who are all screaming about clean air are not man-dating emission standards for over the ocean shipping? You may want to com-ment to your MP about the situation.

Here are some sources to check w w w. g u a r d i a n . c o . u k /e n v i r o n -ment/2009/apr/09/shipping-pollution this is the story that details the prob-lems.

Google “Emma Maersk” and “MSC Danit” these are the largest con-tainer ships on the sea, at the moment, carrying between 11,000 and 14,000 20 ft. shipping containers! Powered by engines developing over 100,000 hp that will drink 6,275 liters of fuel per hour, these are huge polluting ma-chines. Instead of trying to get the last possible drop of air pollution from the automobile, at enormous cost to the driving public, let’s suggest to our politicians they have other fish to fry. Maybe not, since those fish are prob-ably polluted.

So those ultra green cars coming from China, Japan and Korea may not help the environment once they ar-rive on our shores. Huge cost increases in shipping could make the offshore manufacturer open plants in North America putting our labour forces back to work. That would be a good thing. •

Edito

r’s N

ote

Editorial

6 • PiM • SPRING 2010

Power Wagon

There are numerous ways to describe Geoff Ellis. Words

like, mad scientist, accom-plished artist, perfectionist, all come to mind. You see, Geoff makes his living bring-ing other peoples wild ideas to fruition. His sculptures are enormous when neces-sary. His installations are all over the world.

His company, Motorware Inc. has created a Sabre Jet fu-selage for the Canadian War Museum in Ottawa, built a 15-foot-tall sneaker for Nike World Cup in Paris France, constructed an old sailing

ship complete with authen-tic hardware for the Pirate Soul Museum in Key West Florida. Motorware Inc. cre-ates custom-themed environ-ments, dioramas and exhibit components for museums and display companies. There are examples of Geoff’s work in all corners of the world. Instead of the other names, let us just say that Geoff is a “creative genius,.”

Since he restored his first car, a 1968 Beetle, at an early age, his list of projects is long, with a large number of com-mercial vehicles, heavily lean-ing towards military hard-

ware leading the pack. Geoff’s latest project is

his 1957 Dodge Fargo Civil-ian Power Wagon. While it is neither, a hot rod, a col-lector car or a muscle car it is too unique not to be seen on our pages. Geoff brings his remarkable attention to detail to this truck. When he first acquired his Fargo it was in need of lots of work. In fact, Geoff describes the body restoration as extensive. Re-placement parts were either NOS, or if none were avail-able, fabricated from scratch.

The suspension was com-pletely gone through with

POWERWAGON

1957 DODGE FARGO


all worn parts replaced and every piece brought back to better than new condition. Similarly, the engine saw a complete rebuild. The origi-nal 1957 Chrysler 6-cylinder engine displaces 251-cu.in. producing 155 HP at 3,400 rpm. Geoff describes it as extremely slow, but notes it would be a good contestant for a hill climb.

Inside the cab, the instru-ments, steering wheel and upholstery were all restored by Geoff and Motorware. In fact, with the exception of the final paint, all work was completed by Geoff.

As you look over the Pow-er Wagon, you cannot miss the remarkable attention to detail that Geoff has put into it. No Power Wagon ever came off the production line in this condition – it is sim-ply astonishing. Geoff enjoys driving it and considers it an excellent advertisement for his company.

If that is not enough, Geoff has three other projects on the go, a 59 El Camino, a 59 Chev 2- door hardtop and a 47 Chevrolet business coupe. We can’t wait to get a look at these. •

Story and Photos by Thomas Andrews


The Motorware Power Wagon is all business, nothing frivolous, no useless accessories just plain functional.

Geoff restored the instruments and steering wheel, even redid the upholstery himself. With five, count them, five con-trol levers, you don’t just hop in a Power Wagon and drive it away. No one said it would be easy.

Everything is authen-tic, period correct, right down to the HD 1957 hose clamps. When was the last time you saw these?Just like looking back in time… oil bath air cleaner, externally mounted oil filter, all the right parts and pieces.

The floor in the pickup bed has been carefully stained and varnished. Bet it didn’t look like this when it came from the factory.

1957 FARGO POWER WAGON


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How many trucks come with their very own pickaxe, shovel, tow rope and axe as standard equipment? With a Fargo Power wagon, you were ready for any emergency.

It is guaranteed that Geoff’s Power Wagon is far better fin-ished than when it rolled off the production line in 1957.

Note the really neat cowl mounted running light. Add a red lens and these would make great hot rod taillights.

Got an unusual project?Reach MotorWare at:

[email protected]


There was no stopping Bruce Boland in Pro Modified Racing

Association competition this year. The veteran took another new car at the start of the season, winning four of the six PMRA events in 2009 to claim his third consecutive PMRA championship. “Nothing went wrong,” Boland explained about his

success this year. “The car went better and better each weekend.”

After winning the 2008 PMRA title with his B&B Racing 1963 Corvette, Boland purchased the former Larry Sinke 1967 Chevy Nova Pro Modified, and went right back to his winning ways. “We were lucky,” he added. “This car went down every track.

Everything went great.” Boland’s Nova was powered by an ERD (Engine Research & Development) 526-cubic inch Brad Anderson (BAE) Supercharged Hemi, coupled to a Lenco three-speed transmission.

In a year filled with highlights, his biggest highlight came during the July 18 running of the IHRA MOPAR Canadian

Nationals at the Grand Bend Motorplex. Boland set the pace with a 4.030-second, 1 8 3 . 3 9 - m p h qualifying pass and never looked

Pro Modified Racing Association

PMRA

Pro Modified Racing AssociationWritten by: Tim Miller • Photos By Mike Goodwin, Rob Potter, Brad Turk, Dale Boeru, Bruce Biegler & Bill Mehlenbacher

2009 PMRA Champion Bruce Boland


back, winning the event on the eighth-mile. He also won PMRA events at TMP’s Cayuga Dragway June 14 and September 20 and at Grand Bend August 16. Since he started in PMRA competition in 2005, Boland has won the title in 2007, 2008, and 2009. Attendance and consistency has been a big part of his success, along with some great work on the car and behind the wheel.

Placing second in the fifth year of PMRA competition was Mark Nielsen of Brantford, Ontario, with his G-Force Race Cars 1968 Camaro.

Third was the 1941

Willys of J. Roth Racing with Jeff Roth of Kitchener, Ontario behind the wheel. Roth, driving a new car, won the final PMRA event at the Grand Bend Motorplex over the Labor Day weekend.

Fourth was Scarborough, Ontario’s Eric Latino with his popular 1938 Chevy coupe, and fifth was the Clarkston Michigan team of Kalso Motorsports with Jason Kalso at the wheel of the 1971 Plymouth Barracuda.

The Pro Modified Racing Association, was organized late in 2004, with racing operations starting in 2005, Now in its

sixth year of operation, the PMRA is a self-governing organization with input from its teams adhering to the technical and safety rules of the International Hot Rod Association (IHRA) and the National Hot Rod Association (NHRA).

Event venues such as Toronto Motorsports Park and Grand Bend Motorplex have been the scene of intense PMRA racing during 2009.

Cars in the PMRA capture the true spirit of hot rodding, Combining classic body styles and modern equipment, constructors are permitted, within established rules and


parameters, to modify and enhance the cars in both appearance and performance. and the class is one of drag racing’s most exciting and colourful classes, offering a diverse group of race cars with different types of 2,500-horsepower supercharged, nitrous-powered and turbocharged engines.

The cars are fuelled by gasoline or methanol, propelling them down the quarter-mile in low six-second times at over 200 miles per hour. The PMRA provides drag race fans in Eastern Ontario and America’s North-East the opportunity to see, hear, and experience the popular Pro Modifieds, known as “the world’s fastest door slammers.”

If you want to see exciting racing, go to www.PMRA.ca to view their complete up-to-the-minute 2010 schedule. •

2010 SCHEDULE PMRA & QUICK 32 SPORTSMAN SERIES DRAG RACING

May 21-23: Victoria Day Weekend - PMRA & Quick 32 Sportsman Series - Toronto Motorsports Park - Cayuga, Ontario June 25-27: RPM Magazine Media/Family Weekend - Quick 32 Sportsman Series - Grand Bend Motorplex - Grand Bend, Ontario July 2-3: AHRA Reunion Tour - PMRA & Quick 32 Sportsman Series - Toronto Motorsports Park, Cayuga, Ontario July 16-18: IHRA MOPAR Nitro Jam Nationals - PMRA - Grand Bend Motorplex, Grand Bend, Ontario August 6-8: Stratford Spectacular Hot August Nationals presented by Ideal Supply & NAPA Auto Parts - PMRA & Quick 32 Sportsman Series - Grand Bend Motorplex, Grand Bend, Ontario September 3-5: Teamsters “Thunder by the Beach” - PMRA & Quick 32 Sportsman Series - Grand Bend Motorplex, Grand Bend, Ontario Saturday, November 13: Sixth Annual Champions Banquet - Best Western Cairn Croft Hotel - Niagara Falls, ON Canada

Schedule - Subject to Change

Quick 32 Sportsman Series

After watching the growing success of the PMRA, some of

the high horsepower sports-man racers wanted to try to emulate a similar series with their styles of cars. This desire soon became the new companion series to the PMRA, the Quick 32 Sportsman Series presented by NAPA Auto Parts, The Quick 32 also raced six times during 2009. The se-ries consists of two separate divisions, one featuring Top Dragster classes “open wheel cars,” with Top Sportsman, or “door cars,” filling the other division.

Each class qualifies 16 cars and goes through elimi-nations separately, once com-pleted the winners of each division race for the event title. This new venture pro-vides $3,000 to win for each event and $5,000 for the an-nual Series champion at sea-sons end. These payouts are very popular with competi-tors guaranteeing large fields of race cars at every event. With six races during the inaugural 2009 season, the Quick 32 got off to a strong start.

The Stratford, Ontario-based Top Sportsman team of K&K Racing won the

Quick 32 Sportsman Series inaugural championship. There was a fair bit of thrash-ing with a new car, and some mechanical gremlins, but driver and team owner Kevin Wicke and his Dodge Stratus came out on top.

“We won rounds when we needed to,” explained Wicke, driver of the 604-cu-bic inch with B1 Heads - 2-stage NOS system-pow-ered Stratus. “This was a new car for us, and we spent a lot of late nights with it. We got the car to come around by the last few races,” he said. “We had some mechanical woes, and we broke some lit-tle stuff which gave us lots of grief. But we figured out the tune-up.” The RJ Race Cars Stratus, a former Pro Stock car, employs a Hutchinson Two-speed Powerglide/Coan Converter transmis-sion and a Magna Fuel Sys-tem setup.

Quick 32 Sportsman series

2009 Quick32 Champion Kevin Wicke

Written by: Tim Miller • Photos By Mike Goodwin, Rob Potter, Brad Turk, Dale Boeru, Bruce Biegler & Bill Mehlenbacher


Placing second in the Quick 32 Sports-man Series was Jamie Bridge of Napanee, Ontario, with the Lynja Motorsports Top Dragster. Carl Spiering of Jordan Station, Ontario was third, driving his 2007 Chevy Cobalt Top Sportsman.

Fourth was Michael Kalin of Youngstown, New York, with his Top Drag-ster. And fifth was the Top Dragster entry of TJ Schippling of Shakespeare, Ontario, who won the first Quick 32 Sportsman Series event in the Series’ history, held May 17 at the Cayuga Dragway of TMP.

The Quick 32 Sportsman Series is com-mitted to providing a professional atmo-sphere for its teams. It will also provide solid media and logistic support to ensure it be-comes one of the most popular drag race se-ries running Top Sportsman and Top Drag-ster race cars.The Quick 32 Sportsman Series presented by NAPA Auto Parts competed several times in 2009 with the Pro Modified Racing Association, www.PMRA.ca, as well as selected special events, offering fans a great show of drag racing.•

Quick 32 Sportsman series


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2010 Canadian International Autoshow

Really liked the Ford Fiesta flat-screen display. It was the first thing you saw as you came up the escalator.

This new Ford Flex offered “SYNC powered by Microsoft” voice-actuated phone, MP3, text and 911 assist. This technology offers a safe, hands-free solution to operating these devices.

February 12 – 21, 2010 was the 36th running of the Canadian International

Autoshow; this prestigious auto-motive event is primarily a venue to present the public with the very latest in new cars and new car technology. Manufacturers use the show to premiere their latest, most exciting offerings. All the turmoil in the manu-facturing side of the business showed in a reduction of floor area.

This year there were no exhibits in the Skydome, effec-tively reducing the display area by be-tween 15 - 20%. In

addition a number of manufac-turers had more spacious displays than in years past. Personally I did not think any of this was bad, we had less distance to walk and more room to walk around.

We were easily able to see everything that mattered. This year’s show had a high volume of hybrid and other green technolo-gies on display including the next gen Ford Focus with their new My Ford system that uses voice commands. While we didn’t have a chance to try it out they told me I couldn’t just hop in and yell “take me home” yet, but they were working on it.

There were a number of inter-esting concept cars on the floor.

Canadian International Autoshow 2010

Story & Photos by: Len Sly


We found this great looking LF CH Hybrid concept in the Lexus booth. Designed at Toyota’s California R & D centre you can see they are appealing to the sport compact car enthusiast.

Toyota Prius Plug-In Hybrid with the plug-in tower. It can be recharged with 110 power in three hours; wire it with 220 and you will reduce recharge time to one and a half hours. The first Toyota propelled with a Lithium Ion battery.

Some that looked great, that we hope will come to completion, a couple of others that would cause you to ask “What were they thinking?” However even if you are not in need of a new car at this moment there are still a number of features designed to appeal to the car enthusiast. Here are some that will make you pray for spring and dry roads.

On the 800 level you could find the Cruise Nationals display. The Cruise Nationals competi-tion comprises the 10 finalists from the 60 cars that were origi-nally chosen from selected cruise night locations throughout 2009. This year’s finalists were a mix of carefully restored and modi-fied vehicles. The oldest on dis-play was Doug O’Brien’s 32 Ford three-window coupe, with the newest John Whitelaw’s 1971 Chevrolet Nova SS. All ten cars were stunning and a difficult choice for those who had to pick the winners. Unfortunately, for some reason this area was cur-tained off during the media day, and since the next day was our deadline, we were unable to get photos to show you.

Interested in NASCAR? You could try the race simulator at


Also in the Subaru display was one of their Rally Team cars. In 2009, Subaru won the Canadian Rally Championship.

This Steve Millen, Mike Monticello-driven Nissan Rally car competed in the 2009 Targa Newfoundland event. They came first in their class and sixth overall.

Ford had their Reflex concept on display. While not new, originally introduced in 2006, you have to admit this is a great-looking car that Ford should build.

When you think of Lincoln, I doubt

your mind wanders to a vehicle like the

If you wanted a close look at what goes into one of today’s vehicles,

this Subaru cutaway let you see mechanical

details that are usually hidden.


the NASCAR Race Day display. Here you were pitted against other show attendees trying to set the best time with your race car. Additionally, you could learn all about the upcoming NAS-CAR season, get a schedule and perhaps plan a trip to one of the races this year. Meanwhile, past

races were being broadcast on the big screens in the booth.

Lots to do and see during the Autoshow, pretty well something to suit every taste. Plan now to attend the 2011 version to see all the latest “stuff.”

Me, I still think a big block 68 Chevelle SS with no power steer-

ing, converted to front disk brakes is that last great car. No comput-ers, no drive by wire, the steering column was still attached to the steering box etc, but that’s just me. •

Lincoln C Concept. Power is from a

fuel-efficient “Eco Boost” 4-cylinder

engine hooked to a dual clutch

“Powershift” six-speed transmission.

This Infinity G37S coupe sported

a radical paint treatment. Who says

the OE’s don’t keep an eye on what the

enthusiasts are doing.

The 2011 Honda CR-Z Hybrid Coupe

is a far cry from Civics of old, predicted to

be available in late 2010. Powered by a

1.5L i-VTEC engine with a three-mode

drive system, the CR-Z is loaded with features to make the

car fun to drive.

Just in case potential customers had

a soft spot for motorcycles, Honda had one of their

water-cooled, shaft drive

“Fury” cycles in the display.

Pretty cool.


Shelby Gala & Display

AUTOSHOW • Shelby Showcase

The Shelby Cobra has been one of the

most replicated cars in history. This replica is

a Johnex Cobra Kit assembled in 1992.

This 2000 Shelby Mark 1 was in extremely

limited production. The Mark 1 is powered by a

GM Northstar V8. This car has only seen 190

miles on the roads.

In the early 50s, Carroll Shelby participated with

a team from England driving a specially

prepared, streamlined and supercharged

Austin Healey 100S. Together, they broke 70

international endurance records at the Bonneville

salt flats.

At the infancy of his racing career, Carroll

drove a texas-based Cad-Allard J2 to victory

in Caddo Mills, Texas. From 1952 to 1954, he continued his winning

ways behind the wheel of similar Cad-Allards.


By far the biggest deal this year, for those of us with an interest in the his-tory of the performance automobile,

was the Gala Reception celebrating Carroll Shelby’s induction to the International Di-vision of the Canadian Motorsports Hall of Fame. Those present had an opportunity to rub shoulders with many of Canada’s best-known car nuts, plus other international car enthusiasts in attendance.

Gala attendees got to watch the induc-tion ceremony, view the Shelby display and participate in the evenings live auction for a brand new 2011 Ford Shelby GT500, signed and authenticated by Carroll himself.

Additionally, they auctioned a cus-tompainted Harley Davidson Fat Boy. So depending on how much money you were carrying, you could have gone home on two wheels or four.

Combined with the Gala was a 3,5000-square-foot display of the cars that made Carroll Shelby famous. There were Shelby Mustangs, Cobras, Cobra Coupes and a Shelby Daytona Coupe. Also on dis-play were the cars that Carroll influenced over his career. Cars like the Cad-Allard and the Austin Healey 100S. There was also a version of the GT40 coupe that Shelby raced out of his California shop from 64-67. •


Five of these Cobra Roadsters were built to

meet FIA rules in 1964. Designed to challenge the

best Europe had to offer, these cars brought the FIA

World Championship to Shelby and the U.S.

In 1966, Carroll directed Fords Mark 11 GT40

racing program to a 1-2-3 finish at Le Mans. In

‘67, Ford built 10 ultra light Mark IV versions with 500 hp 427 “side

oiler” power. Only raced twice, they won both

Sebring and Le Mans. That accomplished, Ford

withdrew from future competition. This is one of the remaining GT40 MK

IV “J” cars.

The legendary 1965 Shelby GT350 Mustang was nothing more than a race car in street clothing.

Hard-core “go fast” guys loved them, but many buyers found them too unforgiving, too harsh

handling. There were only 562 of these produced.

In 1967, the GT500 Mustang became a more

civilized version of the early GT350s. Creature

comforts and driveability improved, the GT350’s

brutal habits were smoothed over.


In an effort to up the top speed of the Cobra, a coupe was designed in 1964. Dubbed the Daytona Coupe CSX 2299.

This is the view the competitors saw dur-ing the 1964 running of the 24 hours of Le Mans with Bob Bondurant and Dan Gurney at the wheel.

In 65, they drove their Daytona coupe to victory in the FIA world championship.

Only six of these race cars were built .

This car is currently valued in excess of U.S. $7 million. •

AUTOSHOW • Shelby Showcase


OK, it didn’t take a DNA test

to realize we don’t have the NASCAR gene. But after three years of living 15 minutes from the speedway, we needed to go to the race at least once. So, thanks to some freebie tickets, we were ready to watch “The Great American Race.” Here are some random thoughts from non-race fans:

The day got off to a slow start. The two mile drive from the Interstate exit to the satellite parking lot took nearly two hours.

No matter where you sit at a 2.5-mile racetrack, your seat will be roughly 1.2 miles from your gate of entry.

The one fan-friendly thing NASCAR does that should be emulated by every other sport: you can bring in your own food and beverages! Based on what I saw, beer is one of the four official food groups.

Racing is best viewed when temperatures are warm. Thanks to global warming, we were in sweaters and winter coats. When the sun slipped down in the sky and the breeze

kicked up, they were very helpful. Could be the first year NASCAR needed to drain the radiators and top off with Prestone.

Tim McGraw’s three-song “mini concert” (three songs is apparently the attention span of a TV audience) was entertaining.

The non-stop advertising and marketing is almost comical. Everything is corporately choreographed. Even for a PR guy, the promotion was shameless.

Jimmy Johnson’s hair must be a fiberglass shell. It doesn’t move in a gale-force wind.

Harry Connick Jr. did a great job on the national anthem. NASCAR fans really “get” the “take your hat off” tradition during the invocation and anthem, I guess that makes them just a little bit smarter than NFL fans.

Sarah Palin’s shrill voice makes fingernails dragged across a blackboard sound like a concerto. They pierced through my ear plugs like a 50-calibre shell through a piece of Styrofoam. Painful!

The people who sat in front of us were the perfect stereotypes. He was about 350 pounds and wore what looked like flannel pajama bottoms. She was about 275 with a Dale Jr. T-Shirt.

EXPERIENCEDAYTONA 500 THE

The Daytona 500 Experience


They were pouring vodka in their cranapple juice. He was ripping through a can of Pringles and she was smoking like a fiend. And between the two of them they had half a set of teeth, which I’m sure are brushed regularly – once a month, whether they need it or not.

The highlight of the day was the F-15 flyover. Two jets with full afterburners flying at what seemed was tree-top level streaking right over our shoulders and across the track. AWESOME!

It was eye-opening to think that 200,000 fans attended the event. That’s one big crowd! The logistics are pretty incredible.

Those cars really go fast! (just validating the obvious).

Note to the fans in front of us: do you think the drivers, really care if you are giving them a “thumbs down?” Remember, you paid $200 to sit in that metal folding chair. They’re getting paid $2 million to go 200 mph! And they didn’t have a two-hour, two-mile drive to get there!

It took Jack about 10 laps to have enough of racing.

It took me at least twice that long, but essentially you’re mostly looking at “Sprintvision” – a large TV.

Once the cars begin making pit stops, and are no longer in the lead pack, it’s virtually impossible to tell who’s leading or where they are on the track.

The guy next to us was well into his second six-pack early in the race. I think there’s a direct correlation between beers consumed and attendee satisfaction levels.

Accidents are more spectacular when you are watching them at home with multiple angles/replays/in-car cams, etc.

And then there was the pothole patch thing! It came about two-thirds into the race, long after Jack’s patience had gone into triple-overtime. The fact that the breeze kicked up, we were losing sunlight and a growing mound of empty beer cans surrounded us served as the clincher.

The prospect of 200,000 tired, drunken spectators all heading for the shuttle buses at the same time when the race finally concluded made us head for the exits.

We watched the rest of the race eating Chinese take-out at a friend’s home in the comfort of a living room sofa and with benefit of a heating system.

Bottom line: It is an amazing “event.” And for free tickets, we certainly got our money’s worth. But we’ve checked the box. Been there, done that, and don’t really need to do it much more in the future. (Probably the same thing non-riders say about bike week.) •

Jeff Simek is originally from the Northeast U.S. He is a big motorcycle fan, writing for the Daytona chapter of the Harley Owners Group newsletter, but has never developed an interest in NASCAR.

Written by: Jeff Simek • Illustration By Rob McJannett


Targa Newfoundland


Prepared from material provided

by Melissa Crummey and Doug Mepham.

If you are feeling uncom-fortable planning for international flights due to body scanning

and orifice inspections, or are trying to keep your vacation costs down by staying in Canada, start today to plan a trip to Newfoundland. “The Rock” is a great place to visit,

friendly people, fantastic vistas, unusual food scrunchions, cod cheeks and brewis just to name a few. Plus infamous Newfound-land Screech, a drink guaranteed to alter your normal behaviour.

Better yet, plan to be on “The Rock “during the 2010 Targa New-

foundland, the first and only event of its kind to be held in North America. One of only three such

events being held in the world. Continents away there are Targa Tasmania and Targa New Zealand. After 9 years, every aspect of this high-end automotive adventure just keeps get-ting better, with 2010 looking like the best yet. As motorsport enthusiasts, we know that limits were made to be pushed and cars were designed to be driven. During the Targa event, both of these desires come to fruition. For many Targa’ is a seen as simply, ‘a car event,’ but seasoned Targa fans know it is much more than a car event!

Begun in 2002, Targa Newfoundland has grown to be-come an internationally known, eagerly anticipated event in the Motorsports world. After all, who wouldn’t want to par-ticipate in an event where the police close the roads and then encourage you to go faster!

Targa Newfoundland has attracted international inter-est, with competitors participating from Canada, the United States, the United Kingdom, Bermuda, Australia, New Zea-land, Ireland, Holland, Germany, and the Bahamas, even the Turks & Caicos have been the home of competitors making Targa a truly international event. The event hosts a unique ar-ray of competitors. Men and women of all ages, come from a diverse blend of professional backgrounds, to compete. They all find common ground at Targa Newfoundland with their


passion for Motorsports, their enjoyment of fine hos-pitality and the thrill of the unknown that comes with world-class rally competi-tion. Entering (and finishing) Targa is often a personal goal long in the making!

The event offers a diverse roster of cars, many of the competitors’ cars are high-end purpose-built vehicles, equipped with the latest in-car technology suitable for lucrative competition, however, there is a place for other vehicles with a family history where an entire fam-ily may have built the car for this specific event. There is even a class, Grand Touring, where you can compete in your classic car just to enjoy

the drive. Manufacturers use Targa Newfoundland as the ultimate testing ground for cars or components that are new (or yet to be released!) to the market. The difficulty of the course and the event or-ganizers’ attention to detail provides key factors for test-ing the capabilities of their chosen machine or compo-nent. If it survives the Targa unscathed, they are pretty well assured that they have a suitable vehicle or part to release to the general public.

The island portion of the province of Newfoundland provides a spectacular back-drop for Targa Newfound-land. This world-class event takes competitors through sweeping vistas, along rug-

ged coastlines, through re-mote communities, while stops allow participants to meet and mingle with New-foundlanders to experience first-hand, the warm New-foundland hospitality.

Competitors travel over 2,200 kilometres each year with 20% of this being ‘Tar-ga’ competitive event stages. Along the route, host com-munities have Car Shows. These have become a criti-cal component of the event allowing the locals who are hosting the event in their community the chance to meet the competitors and learn about their interesting and often rare cars.

The competitors have a chance to meet their hosts,


while the down-time offers the opportunity to fine-tune and adjust their vehicle in time for the next day’s fun.

Targa Newfoundland consists of a technical day, a prologue (practice day) and five days of full on competi-tion. Each day competitors are challenged with a com-bination of closed road com-petition stages and transits to allow easy movement from stage to stage.

The event begins and ends in one of North America’s most vibrant and oldest cit-ies, St. John’s, home to Signal Hill, Cape Spear and the in-famous St John’s Pub Crawl on George St! There is more to do than simply watch the Targa.

Often the event will double the population of the communities in which they stop – competitors are cheered on by families, friends and supporters from the roadside. In Newfound-land & Labrador, you’ll find thousands of hard core Targa fans willing to take a moment to tell you all about their be-loved province.

Targa Newfoundland 2009 ended the way it began — with a splash. The rally covered its 2,200 kilo-metres with minimal incident. Mechanical failure

removed more competitors from the course than driving in-cidents, and although some switched categories from Targa to Grand Touring, almost all who started the event drove across the finish line at the Keg Friday evening.

When the skies cleared, provisional results showed Roy Hopkins and Adrienne Hughes had come from behind Thursday’s leaders to grab their third overall win in a row. They managed to clear all stages penalty-free for the final two days in their 1969 BMW 2002

Michael Stoschek of Coburg, Germany, and co-driver Philipp Spaeth of Lake Orion, Michigan, held on to second place in their 1965 Porsche 911.

Steve Millen and Mike Monticello were the cream of the Modern crop, running sixth over-all with 1:20 in penalties.

In Grand Touring, the BMW 325i-driving team of Ferdinand and Chrisoph Trauttman-sdorff stayed penalty-free for the whole event, posting the only zero score of the event.


There’s no question Targa Newfoundland provides se-rious competition for those who want it and for those who don’t, the Grand Tour-ing option allows teams to compete, while not pushing their limits or endangering their cherished vehicle.

The headlines and high-profile media attention goes to the Targa competitors, in which competition prepared cars, compete on more than 40 closed-road Targa stages, where speed is what counts. As you’d expect, these are fully-caged cars with all of

the usual safety gear. Driv-ers and co-drivers (naviga-tors) must have competition licences, although the event can license competitors who have a demonstrated compe-tition history.

The cars run against the clock, but also individual


classes have ‘factors’ which give them times to meet or beat on each of the Targa stages. Make your time and you don’t accumulate any penalties. Miss your time, and you get penalized by the number of seconds you are over, with penalties ac-

cumulating through the fivedays of competition. A newer car with more mods has a faster time to beat than an older, stock car, for obvi-ous reasons. That means Jud Buchanan’s Acadian Canso small block competes against the vintage NSU Prinz on a

handicap basis. Over the past eight years, the factors have been very refined to the point where they are very, very close to performance of the cars and make for close racing.

The other competition Grand Touring, is designed for both beginners and


experienced crews and al-lows them to compete on a level that does not require a fully-prepared competition vehicle. Not even a roll cage is required in Grand Tour-ing. Any street legal car can take part. The GT event is only scored on the closed Targa stages, so there is lots of chance to exercise your car.

The 9th annual Targa Newfoundland will start in St. John’s on Saturday, Sep-tember 11, 2010, and end back in the capital Saturday, September 18. The compe-tition will cover more than 2,000 kilometres of the chal-lenging, twisty roads of the central and eastern portion of Newfoundland, including up to 450 kilometres of closed-road, flat-out Targa stages. •

Top 10 reasons to participate in Targa Newfoundland

1. Joiningthe‘TargaFamily’istheultimateexclusiveclubforthedie-hardmotorsportenthusiast–aglobal‘brotherhood’likenoother!

2. Showoffyourcarduringtheannualscheduleofcarshows,withayearlyvisitorrateof25,000fans!Trustus,you’llplayherototheyoungandoldhundredsoftimesover…

3. You’llberaisingvaluablefundsforchildrenwithdisabilitiesthroughourstrategicalliancewiththeofficialcharityofTargaNewfoundland,EasterSeals.

4. Getyouradrenalinetotallypumpingnon-stopforaweekwhileyouchallengeyourselfandyourcar(historic,classicandmodernwelcome!)onanopen-andclosed-roadcompetitionononeofthemostbeautifulislandsonEarth.

5. Whileyou’replayingadventuretouristinNewfoundlandduringTargaweek,you’llenjoytheoldworldhospitalityoftheislandandknowyou’vebeentransportedsomewhereveryspecial.

6. Havethemostfunofyourlifewhileyoulive‘thedream’anddriveYOURcarthewayitwasmeanttobedriven.Or,justthewayyou’vealwaysdreamedofdrivingit!

7. Developremarkablepersonalandprofessionalnetworkswithpeopleyou’vealwayswantedtomeet,butjustdidn’tknowwheretofind!

8. Experienceatrueallegoryoflifewherethekeytosuccessliesintheunexpectedandhowyoucopewithit.

9. Achancetofundraiseandpromoteyourcharityofchoice–manyuseTargaNewfoundlandasachancetogetinvolvedintheircommunity!

10. Berewarded–byyourself,yourfellowteammembersandthethousandsofTargafansthatwilllinethestreetstocheeryouon!

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Times have Changed

If you grew up a car nut before cell phones, MP3 players, computers, and

dozens of other electronic devices, you know that the tried and true way to get more horsepower and im-proved performance was to add the best performance parts available in the day.

Everyone had to have dual exhausts with glass pack mufflers, then there were the multi carb intakes, three twos and two fours were most popular. Spark was enhanced with Mallory ignition components. Virtu-ally all enthusiasts had some combination of these. The more adventurous moved into a ¾ or full race cam-shaft, plus a set of tubular headers. If you had all these things, you would also have

the skills to install them or the money to have someone else do it for you.

Times are changing; to-day’s vehicles require a far different approach. Emission laws preclude the removal of the clean air pieces that come on today’s engines. Catalytic converters, sensors etc. must remain functioning or you risk the ire of the law.

All is well, however, we are still able to achieve the level of performance we de-sire, what is changing is the way improved horsepower is created. Today’s vehicles come equipped with engine management systems (com-puters); these computers are set to deliver performance at the lowest acceptable lev-els. Horsepower and torque are not part of the equation

w h e n the OE’s are setting up their systems.

That is where today’s performance products come into play. Instead of a cam-shaft, intake and headers we now go to technology to ac-complish your performance goals. Companies such as Superchips, Edge and others are making hand-held tun-ers for today’s power trains. Instead of crawling into the engine compartment or un-der the car, instead of get-ting greasy and barking your knuckles, now you simply purchase the correct “Tun-er” for your application. In Superchips case, they offer three distinct types of tun-ers: the industry leading Cortex, the Flashpaq and Mileage XS.

Story and Photos by Thomas Andrews

TIMES have Changed


Cortex from Superchips is the meanest street-legal programmer you can buy with the industry’s first two-year powertrain warranty. Depending on your applica-tion, Cortex pumps up the performance by as much as 318 lbs.-ft of torque and 154 horsepower at the rear wheels! That’s more torque than your neighbor’s wimpy Kia makes in total. Plus the engineers at Superchips give you more power throughout the complete driving range, not just at wide-open throt-tle. In addition to brain-numbing power increases, Cortex lets you adjust trans-mission shifts, move the en-gine rev limiter and change the speedometer calibration.

You can also view a ton of stats like how fast your ve-hicle is smokin’ down the 1/4-mile after you’ve loaded the top-dog calibration. Now available for Chrysler, Dodge, Ford, GM and Nis-san.

Flashpaq offers multiple power levels and a variety of user-tunable options. If you’re burning gasoline, Flashpaq gives you dyno-proven power for either 89 or 91 octane fuel, you choose according to your gas-card balance and need for speed. Diesel owners can choose from max-performance, towing or economy pro-grams. Tire smoking comes standard for all makes and models. There’s no hard part

in the business that will give you more power per dollar spent. But if you like hard parts, Flashpaq is friendly with almost every cold-air intake package, low-restric-tion exhaust system and even some aftermarket throttle bodies. Now available for Chrysler, Dodge, Ford, GM, Jeep and Nissan.

Cost of fuel got you down? By tuning your ve-hicle’s fuel injection, ignition and transmission shift char-acteristics, the Superchips Mileage XS will deliver up to a 20% improvement in fuel economy for diesel pick-ups, and 10% for gasoline-powered vehicles. They also optimize the cylinder-deac-tivation system on GM and

CORTEX • Alpha Dog Power.

Cortex is the programmer your mother warned you about. It’s wicked and mean, and if you’re not ready for seat-cover-sucking power, then turn tail and run.

Cortex pumps up the performance by as much as 318 lbs.-ft of torque and 154 horsepower at the rear wheels! And the engineers at Superchips give you more power throughout the driving range, not just at wide-open throttle like some of the wannabees.

In addition to brain-numbing power increases, Cortex lets you adjust transmission shifts, move the engine rev limiter and change the speedometer calibration. You can also view a ton of stats like how fast your vehicle is smokin’ down the 1/4-mile after you’ve loaded the top-dog calibration.


Chrysler products for more fuel-sipping 4-cylinder op-eration from your V8. That’s money you can put in the bank! The Superchips Mile-age XS also lets you read and clear trouble codes, and you can recalibrate the speedom-eter if you change tire size or gear ratio. Now available for Chrysler, Dodge, Ford and GM.

No matter which pro-grammer you choose, instal-lation could not be simpler. Read the instructions. Plug

the programmer into the OBD-ll port, your program-mer will automatically pow-er up. Follow the prompts on the programmer’s screen. Choose the performance levels and options that you want and you are done. The first time you program your vehicle the stock tune is downloaded to your pro-grammer. If you have to take your vehicle for service sim-ple download the stock tune up before taking it in. Once service is completed, return

to your previous tune.One of the big advan-

tages these tuners offer is the ability to update your device whenever Superchips changes the parameters. Plug your programmer into the USB port on your computer, go to their web site, follow the instructions and update to the latest technology. All for free.

So what can you expect when you reprogram your car or truck? Here are some results on various vehicles:

2010 Camaro 6.2L automatic +21 HP +21 Ft Lbs Torque.2010 Ford F150 Raptor SVT +33 HP +36 Ft Lbs Torque.2008 Cobalt SS +40 HP +53 Ft Lbs Torque2009 Ford F250SD 6.4L +114 HP +206 Ft Lbs Torque2009 Dodge Ram 6.7L Cummins +115 HP +240 Ft Lbs Torque

FLASHPAQ • The Most Bang for Your Buck.

Choose from multiple power levels and a variety of user-tunable options. If you’re burning gasoline, Flashpaq gives you dyno-proven power for either 89- or 91-octane, so you can choose according to your gas-card balance and need for speed. Diesel burners can choose from max-performance, towing or economy programs. Tire smoking comes standard for all makes and models.

There’s no hard part in the business that will give you more power per dollar. But if you like hard parts, Flashpaq is friendly with almost every cold-air intake package, low-restriction exhaust system and even some aftermarket throttle bodies.

SUPERCHIPS Performance Improvements


But what about the costs? Interestingly this late model technology is not as expen-sive as the stuff we used to buy. If you have one of the popular V8 engines from the 80’s and want to add an intake, carb, cam and lifters

and set of headers you can expect to pay just north of $1,000 for the most popular brands. Performance pro-grammers like the ones listed here will run slightly more than $500. Hard to think of anything else that will do

all the things a programmer does at anywhere close to that kind of money. Check to see if your vehicle can be “tuned.” You will be amazed at the performance. •

MILEAGE XS • Be a better miser.

Squeezing every last bit of energy out of a gallon of fuel for improved mileage is just as much of a science as making big horsepower gains.

Superchips Mileage XS can deliver up to a 20-percent improvement in fuel economy for diesel pickups, and 10-percent for gasoline-powered cars and trucks. Mileage XS also lets you read and clear trouble codes, and you can recalibrate the speedometer.

some things can’t be replaced. don’t let unfair laws take you off the road.

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E-Z Install

You know how you get psyched up to do a little project on your

car and it just doesn’t work out; either the parts don’t fit, you don’t have a special tool or something like that. That didn’t happen this time. This project was so easy it was al-most anti-climactic.

The original exhaust on our 2009 Chevy HHR is so quiet you can’t even hear the car running and so ugly it looks as though a bladder exploded behind the rear bumper. Clearly the solution was to replace it with an af-termarket exhaust system.

We settled on the Mag-naflow cat back system; it’s all stainless, polished to a nice shine, with a beautiful tailpipe extension.

I had hoped that because

it’s a new car I would be able to disassemble the exhaust system and just hang it up in the ceiling of the garage in case I needed it in the future.

The exhaust is welded into a single unit (and it’s im-possible to remove it in one piece). I removed the two nuts that hold the exhaust

system to the catalytic con-verter and slipped the brack-ets out of the rubber hangers. I used my abrasive cutter to cut the old exhaust system off.

I removed the catalytic converter gasket from the old exhaust system and slipped it on the new system. Using the

supplied two nuts and bolts, I loosely connected the front pipe to the catalytic convert-er and then slipped the muf-fler and extension pipe over the rear axle from the rear.

The special flat clamp has to be slid onto the rear pipe before the two pipes are con-nected and should be orient-

ed so that you can access the fasteners after the two pipes are slipped together.

With that done it is sim-ply a matter of connecting the rubber exhaust system hangers; a little silicone lu-bricant will help them to slide on easily, then position and tighten the flat clamp.

The original exhaust is so quiet you can't hear the car running & so ugly it looks like a bladder exploded behind the REAR bumper.

E-ZINSTALL

Story & Photo By Phil Adams


Done - total elapsed time about 30 min-utes. This system sounds great! At idle, it sounds as though there’s a small motor boat behind you; at higher RPMs it sounds like a Formula One car.

Now all that’s left to do is to wander into my local auto parts store, buy an ex-haust system sleeve adapter and weld it onto the old system. Then if I ever need to put the original exhaust system back on I’ll have it all ready to go and could probably install it in another 20 minutes. •

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Product Showcase

Product Showcase

Flowmaster is offering three American Thunder Cat Back exhaust systems to fit the 2010 Camaro. These kits are: 2010 Camaro SS with no ground effects (817481), 2010 Camaro SS with ground effects (817487) and the 2010 Camaro LS 3.6L (817483).

The SS kits feature 3” scavenger exhaust pipes and X-pipe and classic two chamber Flowmas-ter mufflers, all built from 409 stainless material. Tailpipe ends are finished off with 4” polished tips.The V6 kit is built from 2.5” 409 stainless tubing and 40 series Classic Flowmaster mufflers. These also come with 4” polished tips. All kits are designed to use factory hanger locations.

On the Centerforce-built 2010 Project Camaro, their dyno results showed a 20 horsepower increase with an additional 30 foot pounds of torque once the Flowmaster kit was installed.

Taylor Cable has announced availability of General Motors V6 spark plug wire sets for the 3.5L, 3.8L, 3.9L engines. Now you can replace defective OE wires with high-quality, high performance Taylor wire sets for 2005 thru 2009 Buick, Chevrolet, Pontiac or Saturn vehicles. These sets are available in either Street Thunder or Spiro Pro materials. Taylor Cable where performance comes down to the wire.

Taylor Cable Billet aluminum battery trays fit Optima Blue, Red, and Yellow Top Batter-ies. Ball-Milled billet aluminum polished finish for a smooth custom look.

3-PC Modular design, light weight & durable. Two models #48220 that fits 34/78 series Optima batteries. #48230 that fits 25/75 series Optima.


Mr. Gasket Shadow Series combines AN-style push-on hose ends and high-quality rubber hose. The fittings are built from aircraft aluminum, anodized in satin black. The high-quality hose is safe for E85 and diesel. Shadow Series hose ends fit all the available AN-style adapters, making plumbing your engine extremely easy. Hose ends come in straight, 45°, 90°, 120°,150°, and 180° configurations. Push-on connections support 250psi with no additional clamps required. If you want quality plumbing under your hood, but do not require the huge pressure limits available with braided stainless hose, Shadow Series offers an economical means of ensuring your hoses do not fail.

Superchips adds tuners for 4.7L V8 Mopar engine applica-tions. Now you can add the 2008 Dodge Ram, Dakota, Durango and Jeep Commander and Grand Cherokee 4.7L V8 engines to the list. The Dodge Gas Flash-paq (part no. 3865), Cortex (part no. 3950) and Jeep Flashpaq (part no. 3875) deliver Superchips tuning for impressive horsepower and torque to the wheels, but it’s the improved drivability and performance that have owners excited.The gains are substan-

tial with the Superchips 93-Octane perfor-mance tune serving up to 54 horsepower and 67 lb-ft of torque when properly equipped. The trucks gain up to 38 horsepower and 30 lb-ft of torque when equipped with a Superchips 87-Octane performance tune.

JUST RELEASED:2009 Dodge Ram 5.7L Hemi – The gains are substantial for your Ram with the Superchips Cortex (PN 3950), or Flashpaq (PN 3865). The 93-Octane perfor-mance tune serves up to 25 max horsepower and 30 lb-ft of torque, the trucks gain up to 20 max horsepower and 28 lb-ft of torque when equipped with the 91-Octane perfor-mance tune.


Aeromotive No matter what your high performance application, the A1000 fuel pump should fill your needs. This pump is durable, reliable, good-looking and able to support high horsepower. Perfect for your daily driver that doesn’t run like a daily driver.

The A1000 will supportFuel Injected Enginesup to 1,300 HP naturally aspirated, up to 1,000 HP forced air induction. Carbureted Engines up to 1,500 HP Naturally aspirated, up to 1,200 HP Forced air induction.

The A1000 has-10 AN inlet and outlet ports and is fully submers-ible for custom in tank placement. This pump can be used with pump gas, race gas, E85, Diesel and alcohol/ethanol fuels.

Product Showcase

Product ShowcaseTKO Performance Electric Exhaust Cut Outs. Simple to install, easy to operate. No more crawl-ing under the car, no more rusty bolts to remove, now you can open your exhaust system with the simple flip of a switch. Simply slip these cutouts into your 2.5” exhaust pipe, press the button and you are out there making horsepower … and a lot of noise.

TKO Performance aluminum water

pumps are designed with a ribbed alumi-num housing.

Inside is a CNC machined iron

impeller and heavy duty bearing assemblies,

These pumps flow 35% more coolant than a standard pump, plus they look good. Lighter than cast iron pumps, available for most popular V8 applications, and best of all they are good value.


Mothers new Powerball 4Lights headlight restoration kits will bring your hazy, stained or faded plastic or acrylic headlights back to crystal clarity. Each kit includes a Powerball polishing tool, an 8 oz. bottle of Power Plastic polish, two restoration pads and a 15” X 15” Microfiber towel. Everything you will need to bring your headlight back to as new condition. All you need is a drill and some elbow grease. The Powerball 4Lights kit will also bring your taillights or any other plastic surface back to perfection.

Helix Dropped Spindles Precision digital engineering processes create a high strength, dependable forged spindle that will lower your vehicle properly while still accepting OE rotors, bearings and calipers. Two inch drop spindles are available for 28 – 48 Ford, Tri 5 Chevrolet, 67-69 Camaro, Mustang ll, Mopar B&E body and more. They also offer a stock replacement Mustang ll spindle. Lower your car the right way.

Joe Gibbs Driven Introduces new Hot Rod Oil created from NASCAR technology.

Hot Rod Oil is ideal for use in your hot rod, street rod, vintage or classic car made before 1973. (Also safe for use in cars made before 1997.) Hot Rod Oil provides all the necessary additives for older engines missing from todays oils.

• STORAGE - Protects against rust and corrosion so your engine is protected when not running.

• HIGH ZINC CONTENT - Delivers proper anti-wear protection for older style engines.

•CAMSHAFT WEAR PROTECTION - The same wear protection found in Joe Gibbs Driven Racing Oil

• SYNTHETIC FORMULA - Provides the best charac-teristics of mineral oil and it provides improved cold-start protection.

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• Stress formed inner and outer layerembossments act like springs thatrebound under exhaust flange clamp load, creating force to seal excessive exhaust pressureproduced from cylinder heads.

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Reluctant Passenger

Ah, the lure of spring and all the warmth it brings, especially

to the garage and driveway. There’s also something else that comes with the onset of this fabulous season—heap-ing buckets of hope for driv-ers and passengers alike.

One thing I’ve learned as I’ve watched the miles go by is that hope springs eternal with all things automotive. Whether it’s hoping an automobile manufacturer finally got it right, hoping there will be some sale-priced items still in stock at your local PI or hoping that the bondo on the left fender will hang on for another season.

Now don’t go thinking that all this wishful thinking will turn your car nut into a positivity machine like Anthony Robbins or anyone from The Secret. Hopefully, it won’t.

What it will do is focus your vehicular virtuoso on what’s important: keeping the ride on the road. Plus, hoping is a relatively quiet activity—one that doesn’t require lug nuts, hoists or lengthy bursts of words that would make a sailor blush.

Not sure where to start? Here are a few hopes you and your driver can try.

Before you get in the vehicle• I hope gas prices don’t go up by the time I get off the driveway.• I hope they fixed the pothole that ate Lenny’s Chevy last month.• I hope one of us knows where we’re going and how to get there.• I hope Miss Sanders—the old lady who drives with her fourteen cats in the car—is staying home to watch Dr. Phil.

Once you’re on the road• I hope I can figure out what’s causing that rattle once I look under the hood.• I hope they haven’t closed all the main roads for construction because of the nice weather.• I hope the other drivers are focusing on the road and not on how fabulous our ride is, especially with the new logo-adorned valve caps.• I hope the chimichangas are still warm when we get there.

When the ride’s in pieces, at home or at the shop• I hope this won’t take him (them) as long as last time.• I hope my next-door neigh-bour didn’t “borrow” my wrench set again.• I hope this is as easy as it looked in the Haynes manual.• I hope I (they) can remem-ber how this all goes back together.

Hopin’ Roado


About the Author: Bonnie Staring is a comedian, ad-vertising copywriter and one of those people who enters all kinds of contests. To see what else she’s been ranting about, visit her website: www.bonniestaring.com

Notice that most hopes are geared toward things that are out of our control. That’s because all the mechani-cal and maintenance stuff should have been taken care of long before the driver gets behind the wheel.

Remember that off season we just had? You know— the one when your automotive aficionado swore he’d check that squeaky belt, arrange for an alignment and maybe, just maybe, get those ball joints inspected?

How quickly they forget. Luckily they have passengers like us to gently remind them. Well, maybe not so gently, but there’s always hope. Enjoy the ride. •

Photo Illustration created by Robert Michaels.

Documents

Spring Performance In Motion 2010