NEGOTIATION TACTICS SILENCE and THINKING TIME Prepared by; Muhammed VURAL M.Mahmut YILMAZ Ozan ÜNLÜ Erkan MURATHAN Hilal KOCAMAZ

NEGOTIATION TACTICSNEGOTIATION TACTICS

SILENCE and THINKING TIMESILENCE and THINKING TIME

Prepared by;Prepared by;Muhammed VURALMuhammed VURALM.Mahmut YILMAZM.Mahmut YILMAZ

Ozan ÜNLÜOzan ÜNLÜErkan MURATHANErkan MURATHAN

Hilal KOCAMAZHilal KOCAMAZ

What is Silence?What is Silence?

““Have more than you showest, Have more than you showest, sspeak less than you knowest.peak less than you knowest.””~ Shakespeare~ Shakespeare

Definition of silence:Definition of silence: The condition of being or keeping still and silent. The condition of being or keeping still and silent. The absence of sound; stillness. The absence of sound; stillness. A period of time without speech or noise. A period of time without speech or noise. Refusal or failure to speak out.Refusal or failure to speak out.

Silence is the absence of mention. In other words, a negotiator usingSilence is the absence of mention. In other words, a negotiator usingthis tactic does not say anything about a negotiation point. Whenthis tactic does not say anything about a negotiation point. Whenused as a tactic in a negotiation, silence can keep the you or theused as a tactic in a negotiation, silence can keep the you or theother party off-balance.other party off-balance.

WWhenhen dodo wewe useuse S Silence?ilence?

1) Silence is 1) Silence is generally used when generally used when negotiators do not want to disclose negotiators do not want to disclose weaknesses in their position.weaknesses in their position.““If I listen, I have the advantage; if I If I listen, I have the advantage; if I speak, others have it.” speak, others have it.” ~ From The ~ From The ArabicArabic

2) W2) When negotiators want to obtain information hen negotiators want to obtain information by letting the other party do the talkingby letting the other party do the talking. Silence . Silence gives you the powerful opportunity to observe gives you the powerful opportunity to observe and learnand learn. We have two ears and one tongue in order that We have two ears and one tongue in order that we may hear more and speak less.we may hear more and speak less.~ Diogenes~ Diogenes

3) 3) When the other party is talking:When the other party is talking:If you interrupt, it irritates the speaker.If you interrupt, it irritates the speaker.

To every thing there is a season...a time to To every thing there is a season...a time to keep silence, a time to speak.keep silence, a time to speak.~ Ecclesiastes~ Ecclesiastes

4)When we want to make the other 4)When we want to make the other party uncertain and impulsive party uncertain and impulsive

5) When other party’s message does 5) When other party’s message does not include any mean or importance for not include any mean or importance for you. you.

6) We use silence at crucial junctures 6) We use silence at crucial junctures (nazik zaman)during a conversation (nazik zaman)during a conversation to understand and empathise with to understand and empathise with the other person. The next time you the other person. The next time you hear a distorted comment, an angry hear a distorted comment, an angry retort, or a biased question, remain retort, or a biased question, remain silent for a short time. Others will silent for a short time. Others will respect you for your restraint. respect you for your restraint.

7)When you're worried or wondering 7)When you're worried or wondering about something, silence is like a about something, silence is like a balm. Silence allows you the time to balm. Silence allows you the time to reflect on the implications, as well as reflect on the implications, as well as your next step. your next step.

The Interpretive ProcessThe Interpretive Process

When silence tactic is used, both When silence tactic is used, both sides must perceive the same sides must perceive the same meaning. But sometimes this is meaning. But sometimes this is difficultdifficult..

The Interpretive ProcessThe Interpretive Process

The ambiguity of silence can cause different reactions:The ambiguity of silence can cause different reactions: the the parties involved might change the subject,parties involved might change the subject, previously previously hidden positions/goals might be revealed or new options hidden positions/goals might be revealed or new options might be discussed. Within such a context, the might be discussed. Within such a context, the consideration of cultural differences is crucial; experience consideration of cultural differences is crucial; experience has shown that people from various cultural backgrounds has shown that people from various cultural backgrounds

react very differently to silence:react very differently to silence: For example: If there is silenceFor example: If there is silence Americans assume other party is angry with themAmericans assume other party is angry with them Japanese are simply evaluating what they have just heard.Japanese are simply evaluating what they have just heard.

Silence in CommunicationSilence in Communication

Silence is a natural part of anySilence is a natural part of any communicationcommunication process.process.

Silence comes in three forms. Silence comes in three forms. 1-Pausing:1-Pausing:The tricky thing about a silence The tricky thing about a silence

contest initiated by the other side is that contest initiated by the other side is that they don’t announce, "OK, I'm going to they don’t announce, "OK, I'm going to start a silence contest." It's just that they start a silence contest." It's just that they say something or ask a question and then say something or ask a question and then there is silence. there is silence.


2-Slowing Down:2-Slowing Down: Go slowly and leave lots of Go slowly and leave lots of gaps for the other side to rush into. gaps for the other side to rush into. Being patient, talking less, and waiting are Being patient, talking less, and waiting are often the keys to a miracle. Your silence often the keys to a miracle. Your silence allows the other party to express their ideas allows the other party to express their ideas which will not only make them feel as though which will not only make them feel as though they are being taken seriously, but will also they are being taken seriously, but will also give you time to get an overall grasp on the give you time to get an overall grasp on the situation. When negotiating, stamina and situation. When negotiating, stamina and endurance usually count the mostendurance usually count the most


3-Waiting To Speak Last:3-Waiting To Speak Last: Concentrate on Concentrate on the other party's body language. the other party's body language. Always listen until the other party Always listen until the other party has finished their last word rather has finished their last word rather than starting to think about your own than starting to think about your own counter argument as soon as they counter argument as soon as they begin talking. begin talking.

Positive Values of SilencePositive Values of Silence

1.1. Allowing silence in a conversation puts Allowing silence in a conversation puts pressure on the other person. pressure on the other person.

2.2. Silence can indicate profoundness, such Silence can indicate profoundness, such as awe or horror. as awe or horror.

3. 3. Silence can indicate respect. Silence can indicate respect. 4.4. Silence can indicate contemplation. Silence can indicate contemplation. 5.5. Silence can be the creation of a listening Silence can be the creation of a listening

space. space. 6.6. Silence can be an indication of empathy. Silence can be an indication of empathy. 7.7. Silence provides time to consider the actual Silence provides time to consider the actual

situationsituation..

Positive Values of SilencePositive Values of Silence8.8. Once somebody knows you’re hot to trot, he’ll Once somebody knows you’re hot to trot, he’ll

exploit it.exploit it.9.9. Silence promotes anxiety and uncertainty in your Silence promotes anxiety and uncertainty in your

counterparts, and that’s good for you. counterparts, and that’s good for you. 10.10. Silence says you have other options, you don’t Silence says you have other options, you don’t

NEED this deal, or else. Always, a person with NEED this deal, or else. Always, a person with options is more attractive and powerful to a options is more attractive and powerful to a suitor.suitor.

11.11. Silence will determine just how serious they are. Silence will determine just how serious they are. Will they communicate again, and how long will it Will they communicate again, and how long will it take? If they can wait, they’re smart, and they’ll take? If they can wait, they’re smart, and they’ll be turning the tables on you. be turning the tables on you.

Negative Negative Values of SilenceValues of Silence1.1. Silence can indicate hostility. Withdrawing, Silence can indicate hostility. Withdrawing,

“stonewalling,” and pouting in silence are ways “stonewalling,” and pouting in silence are ways some people handle anger. Such a silence can be some people handle anger. Such a silence can be pulsating with bad feelings and elicit anger on pulsating with bad feelings and elicit anger on the part of the other person. the part of the other person.

2.2. Silence can indicate disagreement. Silence can indicate disagreement. While it’s While it’s almost never an indication of indifference, silence almost never an indication of indifference, silence can indicate that the other person is having can indicate that the other person is having negative emotions. negative emotions.

3.3. Silence can be intentional rudeness. Silence can be intentional rudeness. Because of Because of the nature of normal conversation allowing an the nature of normal conversation allowing an extended silence can be perceived as rudeness.extended silence can be perceived as rudeness.

CountermeasureCountermeasure

Use silence but also plan what you will do if it isUse silence but also plan what you will do if it is used on you!used on you! We can: We can:

1.) 1.) Accept Silence:Accept Silence: It's just that they say something It's just that they say something or ask a question and then there is silence. or ask a question and then there is silence. When When the other side has started a silence contest, the other side has started a silence contest, wewe usually go into denial. usually go into denial. WeWe might say something might say something like, "now that I've had a chance to think about like, "now that I've had a chance to think about that", or "well, that's an interesting idea and here that", or "well, that's an interesting idea and here is what I propose," or something like that. It sends is what I propose," or something like that. It sends the message that we just had a thoughtful the message that we just had a thoughtful moment rather than a silence moment rather than a silence

2.) 2.) FillFillinging aa void void Most people can't stand dead air time. They Most people can't stand dead air time. They become uncomfortable if there's no conversation become uncomfortable if there's no conversation filling the void between you and them.filling the void between you and them.

We can fill a void by:We can fill a void by: GoGoinging over the key points/features again. over the key points/features again. AskAskinging them a question regarding their them a question regarding their

understanding.understanding. TurnTurninging to their lead negotiator and seek to their lead negotiator and seek

comments.comments. SmilSmilinging gently and say nothing. gently and say nothing. FiddlFiddlinging with your papers to buy time. with your papers to buy time. SeekSeekinging an adjournment an adjournment..

THINKING TIMETHINKING TIME


The dictionary meaning of “take five” The dictionary meaning of “take five” is “to take 5 minutes for rest”is “to take 5 minutes for rest”

This tactic is also called Go to the This tactic is also called Go to the balcony.balcony.

This tactic has taken its name from This tactic has taken its name from “Tak“Takee Five” of famous jazz pianist Five” of famous jazz pianist Dave Brubeck which is composed of Dave Brubeck which is composed of asymmetrical time signaturesasymmetrical time signatures..

Means suggesting a breakMeans suggesting a break


Acceptance timeAcceptance time is a definite is a definite period of time that one party to a period of time that one party to a negotiation has to accept an offer by negotiation has to accept an offer by another party. another party.


WIN-WIN USEWIN-WIN USE

Increase acceptance timeIncrease acceptance time Negotiators may need time to accept Negotiators may need time to accept

smth. new or differentsmth. new or different


WIN-LOSE USEWIN-LOSE USE

Use as a delaying tacticUse as a delaying tactic


COUNTERMEASURE TO WIN-LOSE COUNTERMEASURE TO WIN-LOSE USE USE

Do not take too much time to Do not take too much time to respondrespond


REACTION PROBLEMSREACTION PROBLEMS

Parties tend to be initiatorParties tend to be initiator Respondent is less advantageousRespondent is less advantageous If there is a pressure to conclude If there is a pressure to conclude

take fivetake five


TIMETIME Very important for negotiatorsVery important for negotiators People not only be convinced by People not only be convinced by

arguments but arguments but also also need time to need time to reconcilereconcile

Patience can be an important factor in Patience can be an important factor in negotiations negotiations

““Time pressure” and “time limits” are Time pressure” and “time limits” are parts of negotiationsparts of negotiations


TIME PRESSURETIME PRESSURE Do not accept from your Do not accept from your

constituencyconstituency Think about opponents’ important Think about opponents’ important

time factorstime factors Be skeptical about deadlines Be skeptical about deadlines that that

others imposeothers impose on you. on you.


TIME PRESSURE TIME PRESSURE Produces lower demands, faster Produces lower demands, faster

concessions, faster agreementsconcessions, faster agreements Kelley -1967- says negotiators will be Kelley -1967- says negotiators will be

reluctant to concede but they will reluctant to concede but they will feel greater urgency to dofeel greater urgency to do

Produces less ambitious goalsProduces less ambitious goals Can be useful if Can be useful if unilaterallyunilaterally used used


TIME LIMITSTIME LIMITS Have a hypnotic affectHave a hypnotic affect Makes you tended to accept even if Makes you tended to accept even if

you do not wantyou do not want DO NOT SET YOURSELF DO NOT SET YOURSELF

PSYCHOLOGICAL TIME LIMITSPSYCHOLOGICAL TIME LIMITS

BUY TİME TO THİNKBUY TİME TO THİNK

Once you have named the game Once you have named the game and forestalled your immediate and forestalled your immediate reaction, the next step is to buy reaction, the next step is to buy yourself time to think – time to yourself time to think – time to go the balcony.go the balcony.

BUY TIME TO THİNKBUY TIME TO THİNK

There are several ways to taking time to There are several ways to taking time to think:think:

Go to BalconyGo to Balcony Take a Time-outTake a Time-out Pause and say nothingPause and say nothing RRewind the Tapeewind the Tape RecessingRecessing AdjournmentsAdjournments

1)GO TO BALCONY1)GO TO BALCONY

When dealing with adversarial people it is When dealing with adversarial people it is important therefore not to react to their important therefore not to react to their behavior.In order not to react it may be behavior.In order not to react it may be necessary to distance yourself from your necessary to distance yourself from your emotions. Ury popularized this concept by emotions. Ury popularized this concept by describing it as " describing it as " going to the balconygoing to the balcony."."

1)GO TO BALCONY(cont’d)1)GO TO BALCONY(cont’d)

Going to the balcony Going to the balcony simply describes the simply describes the mental imagery used to distance yourself mental imagery used to distance yourself emotionally from the combat zone. It emotionally from the combat zone. It refers to the mental process of stepping refers to the mental process of stepping back from the combative situation and back from the combative situation and seeing it objectively. According to Ury, seeing it objectively. According to Ury, from the balcony, you can assess the from the balcony, you can assess the conflict in a more detached way. This conflict in a more detached way. This allows you to consider the situation more allows you to consider the situation more constructively and explore solutions that constructively and explore solutions that are mutually satisfying.are mutually satisfying.

1) GO TO BALCONY( CONT.)1) GO TO BALCONY( CONT.)

In going to the balcony it is necessary to be able to In going to the balcony it is necessary to be able to identify or name unfair tactics that you are likely to identify or name unfair tactics that you are likely to confront in dealing with adversarial people.confront in dealing with adversarial people.

People can use the following three tactics to sway People can use the following three tactics to sway the negotiations in their favor:the negotiations in their favor:

Inflexibility: Inflexibility: They refuse to negotiate further They refuse to negotiate further becoming inflexible. They want you to feel trapped becoming inflexible. They want you to feel trapped and to believe there is no other way but their wayand to believe there is no other way but their way..

1) GO TO BALCONY( CONT.)1) GO TO BALCONY( CONT.)

Attacks: Attacks: They try to intimidate and They try to intimidate and threaten you so that you give into their threaten you so that you give into their demands.demands.

Tricks: Tricks: They try to deceive you by lying, They try to deceive you by lying, manipulating data, and otherwise mislead manipulating data, and otherwise mislead you into believing that your decision is you into believing that your decision is best for you when it really satisfies their best for you when it really satisfies their interests and not necessarily your owninterests and not necessarily your own

1) GO TO BALCONY( CONT.)1) GO TO BALCONY( CONT.)It is possible to misunderstand others’ It is possible to misunderstand others’ behavior. It becomes critical, therefore, not behavior. It becomes critical, therefore, not jump to conclusions when observing jump to conclusions when observing behavior but to keep a mental record of what behavior but to keep a mental record of what is being saidis being saidand done. Adversarial people tend to use and done. Adversarial people tend to use more than one tactic.more than one tactic.Advantages of going to balcony.Advantages of going to balcony.To review written or an oral proposalTo review written or an oral proposalTo devolope or formulate responseTo devolope or formulate responseTo regain your composureTo regain your composure

2)Take a Time-out2)Take a Time-outOne way to refrain from reacting is to ‘’take One way to refrain from reacting is to ‘’take a time out’’.a time out’’.Especially Especially If the parties become angry, If the parties become angry, they should take a break. They should make they should take a break. They should make their dissatisfaction known and openly their dissatisfaction known and openly discuss the reasons for it.discuss the reasons for it.Negotiations are more productive when Negotiations are more productive when they are broken up by frequent time-outsthey are broken up by frequent time-outsSimply take a break or tell a story to reduce Simply take a break or tell a story to reduce the tension. Finally, never make decisions in the tension. Finally, never make decisions in the heat of the moment. Instead, make it a the heat of the moment. Instead, make it a point to point to go the balcony go the balcony and make your and make your decisions there.decisions there.

3)Pause and say nothing3)Pause and say nothing

The simplest way to buy time to think in The simplest way to buy time to think in the middle of a tense negotiation is to the middle of a tense negotiation is to pause and say nothing. It does you little pause and say nothing. It does you little good to respond when you are feeling good to respond when you are feeling angry or frustratedangry or frustrated Pausing will not only give you a chance Pausing will not only give you a chance to step up to the balcony seconds, but it to step up to the balcony seconds, but it may also help the other side cool down.may also help the other side cool down.

4)Rewind the Tape4)Rewind the Tape

Means:Means:Slowing down the conversation by Slowing down the conversation by planning it back.planning it back. It use to buy more time to think.It use to buy more time to think. By rewinding the tape-which interrupts the By rewinding the tape-which interrupts the routine slows it down-you give yourself time to routine slows it down-you give yourself time to recognize the trickrecognize the trickss and neutralize its impact. and neutralize its impact. An easy way to slow down the negotiation is to An easy way to slow down the negotiation is to take careful notes.take careful notes.Writing down what your counterpart says gives Writing down what your counterpart says gives you a good excuse:”I’m sorry, I missed that. Could you a good excuse:”I’m sorry, I missed that. Could you repeat it?”you repeat it?”

5)Recessing5)Recessing

Recess should always be taken when:Recess should always be taken when: Some complicated calculations have to Some complicated calculations have to be donebe done The emotional temprature is risingThe emotional temprature is rising You are negotiating as a member of a You are negotiating as a member of a grogrouup p

6)Adjournment6)Adjournment

Negotiator’s equivalent of aNegotiator’s equivalent of a time-out. You time-out. You agree to terminate the current negotiating agree to terminate the current negotiating sessionsession

You need a break to:You need a break to:Think about what has been saidThink about what has been saidReconsider your positionReconsider your positionRegroup your teamRegroup your teamConsult with your advisers more senior Consult with your advisers more senior decision makersdecision makersRest and recuperate.Rest and recuperate.

WAYS TO GIVE WAYS TO GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO YOURSELF TIME TO

THINKTHINK

YOU NEED TIME TO THINK

• Many American business people conduct negotiations like a Ping-Pong tournament. Buyer and seller, engineer and consultant, two division managers — all are in a big hurry. A few quick slashes and returns, and it's over. Other cultures, like Europeans and Asians, take a different approach. They are not so hasty. They recognized the obvious: The person who has time to think, thinks better!


The suggestions that follow are effective.

1. Get the other party to present their position before breaking for the day.2. Arrange to get an important surprise visitor or phone call at some crucial point.3. Take a restroom break.4. Get thirsty or hungry.5. Change a member of the negotiating team.


6. Don't have the back-up evidence available.Don't have the back-up evidence available.7.7. Plead ignorance. Ask for time to learn more Plead ignorance. Ask for time to learn more about it.about it.8.8. Have your expert unavailable. Have your expert unavailable.9.9. Load down the other party with documents, Load down the other party with documents, data, or drawings.data, or drawings.10.10. Use an interpreter or third party.Interpreters Use an interpreter or third party.Interpreters can be technical people, lawyers, your boss, or can be technical people, lawyers, your boss, or translators. In any case, they can slow things translators. In any case, they can slow things down.down.


11. If you are on a team, develop rules among your people on how questions will be fielded. Sometimes it is best to have all questions directed only to one person, to give others time to think about the answers.12. Recess and caucus frequently.It is remarkable what we humans see in hindsight. Giving yourself time to think changes hindsight to foresight and it will make you a better negotiator.13. Have a good dancer14. Go to the toilet


15. Check list of verbal devices for gaining time16. Arrange a code with your secretary so that s(he) can break into the conversation an “urgent request for you to go.* “Sorry the chairman has just walked into the office, I’ll get back you”* I’ll call you back in a few minutes * This is an interesting point and I must give it some quiet thought.* Catch your breath and start coughing and gasp out that you need the get a drink of water and will come straight back


Forbearance: When both parties want to reach a win/win solution, they give time to each other to think. This strategy is called forbearance

THANK YOU FOR YOUR THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION!!!ATTENTION!!!

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NEGOTIATION TACTICS SILENCE and THINKING TIME Prepared by; Muhammed VURAL M.Mahmut YILMAZ Ozan ÜNLÜ Erkan MURATHAN Hilal KOCAMAZ