Lifestyles After 50 Marion/Lake/Sumter July 2014 edition

Vol. 25 • July 2014

www.lifestylesa� er50� .com • Marion/Lake/Sumter • FREE

Vol. 25Vol. 25 • July 2014


INSIDE THIS ISSUE• Grand Caregivers• Ready to Retire?• Our Country From A-Z

Chillin’ With Watermelon

Vol. 25 • July 2014


Vol. 25Vol. 25 • July 2014


INSIDE THIS ISSUE• Grand Caregivers• Ready to Retire?• Our Country From A-Z

Chillin’ With Watermelon

Lifestyles After 50 • July 2014 • page 2

I’m Leaving My Desk to Follow Mark Twain’s Advice Dear Readers,

“…So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

Well, Mark Twain, I’m going to throw off the bowlines and

catch some trade winds. This is my last edition as editor of Lifestyles After 50. For 18 years I have writ-ten, scrounged, bought, created, and otherwise attained articles to fill the pages of the five editions of this senior magazine. I went from classroom teacher to proofreading for publisher, Kathy Beck. Soon I was at the editor’s desk, and I have worked with Kathy ever since. I met incredible seniors over the years and added a treasure trove of good memories to my life. I met grandparents struggling with raising grandchildren. I interviewed 85-year-olds still playing softball and artists creating their late-life dream works. I shared in our readers’ great joys and extreme sorrows as the years went by. I not only published articles about senior issues, I personally experienced the death to cancer of my fi rst husband Tom and eight years later married David, whom I met online. With Kathy, I moved in the publish-ing world from page layouts glued

to old fashioned “boards” to the computer age. Amazing changes. I interviewed long-time entertainers like Dick Smothers and Chubby Checker. Frankie Avalon and Phyllis Diller. Andy Williams’ agent called me at 9 p.m. the night before I was to interview him. She told me to call the Fairmont Hotel in San Francisco at 9 a.m. Pacifi c Time and ask for Paul Smith in room 914. I did, and Andy himself answered. When I talked with Florence Hender-son, she turned the interview around after about 10 minutes and said, “What about you? Tell me about yourself.” I remember how that made me feel. Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the sex advice guru, singled me out in a group over lunch and said, “If I weren’t under contract to Clairol until I die, I’d have hair the color of Janice’s. I think nothing is more fl attering than white hair as we age.” Truth is, I’m simply too lazy and too cheap to color my hair—never have, never will. And then to get such a compliment from Dr. Ruth—I found it all very amusing. There was the 90+ year-old WWII Army nurse I traveled to Washington with on an Honor Flight. From meeting her at 4 a.m. to delivering her back to the airport at 9 p.m. was not enough time to get to spend with the charming lady.

What next, you ask? There are children and grandchildren to enjoy, siblings to connect with more regularly, cousins to get re-acquainted with—important family things. David and I will be traveling for longer periods of time but keeping a garden and a little fl ock of chickens here in Florida. I plan to be a curious traveler, a friendly neighbor and a compassionate friend. And I’ll still be covering the veterans issues and travel for this magazine. So, here I go—like so many of you have done—throwing off the bowlines of regular employment. I’m handing over the editor’s desk to Tracie Schmidt who has been associate editor for seven years and can handle anything that comes along. My best to all of you.

Janice Doyle, Editor

(L to R) Publisher Kathy Beck; Editor Janice Doyle; Assoc. Editor Tracie Schmidt

Published monthly by News Connection U.S.A., Inc

Lake, Marion & Sumter Edition

General ManagerDave Tarantul

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EditorJanice Doyle

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Attention Readers: The articles printed in Lifestyles After 50 do not necessarily refl ect the opinion of the Editor or the staff. Lifestyles After 50 endeavors to accept reliable advertising; however, we cannot be held responsible by the public for advertising claims. Lifestyles After 50 reserves the right to refuse or dis-continue any advertisement. Our advertising deadline for the Aug. 2014 issue is July 15, 2014. Magazines are out by the 7th of each month. All rights reserved.

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Have you ever said to yourself “I’d love to get a computer, if only I could figure out how to use it.” Well, you’re not alone. Computers were supposed to make our lives simpler, but they’ve gotten so complicated that they are not worth the trouble. With all of the “pointing and clicking” and “dragging and dropping” you’re lucky if you can figure out where you are. Plus, you are constantly worrying about viruses and freeze-ups. If this sounds familiar, we have great news for you. There is finally a computer that’s designed for simplicity and ease of use. It’s the WOW Computer, and it was designed with you in mind. This computer is easy-to-use, worry-free and literally puts the world at your fingertips.

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Too Few Wheels for the MealsBY EVELYN MACKEY

In 1973 a caring group of individuals in Marion

County realized they had homebound neighbors who needed help prepar-ing food. They organized and began delivering meals to those neighbors. Today that attitude of car-ing for those who can no longer prepare nutritious meals for themselves is part of the national Meals on Wheels program, a program overseen lo-cally by Marion Senior Services. One part of caring for the county’s seniors is the Congregate Meals Program, which has 12 sites through-out the county for those who have transportation to a nearby center that provides space for the noon meal. This program also includes activities and speakers. For seniors who can’t

get out, volunteers pick up packaged meals and deliver them—bringing meals to those who can’t get out. In all, 24 drivers spread out over Marion County delivering meals to senior “neighbors.” Ten drivers are paid staff members who deliver in the more

sparsely populated areas of the county. The other 14 drivers are volunteers. Julie Forehand, Nutrition Counselor for the program, says, “Five days a week volunteer drivers spend their own money for gas to do the routes. Most drive one day a week. Groups from Ocala’s First Presbyterian Church and First Methodist Church have been a part of the program since the beginning, organizing

their own drivers. We also have businesses that participate and their employees drive a route.” Sarah Stroh, Executive Director of Marion Senior Services, says, “The biggest benefit of Meals on Wheels is that each client is getting a well check every day. Someone is looking at the person and catching problems that might occur. If something changes, a driver reports it to the agency and they can intervene if necessary. Also, this short visit is often the highlight of an isolated and lonely senior’s day.” 2013 Volunteer Driver of the Year, John Reiss, started as a volunteer ten years ago with his church group. His route consists of nine to 13 homes in the northeast area of Ocala. He feels good about doing the work because it “keeps people in their homes. It’s helpful to the clients. Many of them have no family connections.” Even though Reiss is on a tight schedule when making deliveries

and doesn’t have time for long conversations, over the weeks of delivering meals, he says, “I enjoy hearing their interesting stories about the lives they’ve lived.” Summertime brings a great need for volunteers. Drivers are needed to ensure that an elderly, disabled or ill person can have a daily nutritious hot meal. When referring yourself or someone else to receive meals, call 352-620-3501. (Something to remember: if you are calling on behalf of someone else, it is a good idea to make sure the person you are referring wants meals. Many times friends and family feel someone needs the meals but the person is not ready.) To volunteer in Marion County, call 352–620-3501 and ask for the volunteer coordinator. In Lake County, call 352-326-3644 to learn more. In the Clermont area, call 352-243-4016.

deliver in the more

Meals on Wheels volunteer driver, John Reiss


SUMMER MUSIC SERIESLive Music, Food & Wine

JuLy 5th (1:00 p.M. - 4:00 p.M.)JuLy 12th (1:00 p.M. - 4:00 p.M.)JuLy 19th (1:00 p.M. - 4:00 p.M.)JuLy 26th (1:00 p.M. - 4:00 p.M.)

20TH ANNUAL HARVEST GRAPE STOMP

Live Music, Food & Wine

$2 donation to beneFit the boys & GirLs cLub

auGust 16th (10:00 a.M. - 5:00 p.M.)auGust 17th (11:00 a.M. - 5:00 p.M.)

B R O A D W A Y C O M E S T O C A M P P R E S E N T S

P U R C H A S E T I C K E T S A T

broadwaycomestocamp.com209.690.7469 • [email protected]

Music by Richard Rodgers . Book and Lyrics by Oscar Hammerstein IIBased on the play “Green Grow the Lilacs” by Lynn Riggs . Original Dances by Agnes de Mille

Hutchinson Auditorium at Florida College • 119 N. Glen Arven Avenue, Temple Terrace, FL

T I C K E T SReserved: $15 (Senior: $12)Child Reserved: $12General (all ages): $10

S H O W T I M E SFriday, July 25 at 7:00 PM

Saturday, July 26 at 11:00 AMSaturday, July 26 at 7:00 PM

Thursdays Lake County Farm-er’s Market. 8:15 am to 1 pm.

Lake County Expo Center and Fair-grounds, Eustis. 352-357-9692.

Saturdays Summer Music Se-ries. 1 pm to 4 pm. Wine, food

and live music. Free admission. Lakeridge Winery, Clermont. 352-394-8627 or 800-768-WINE.

9 “Son of the Rat Pack” 5:30 and 8 pm. Frances Dey. This high

energy show brings back the golden days when Sinatra, Davis, Martin and Darin would bring an audience to its feet. $22. Savannah Center, The Villages, Lady Lake. 352-753-3229.

10 COPD Support Group. Hospice of Marion County,

The Ocala Airheads, invites you to the only support group in town. 2 to 3:30 pm at West Marion Medical Plaza, Ocala. 352-433-7353.

10 Talako Indian Dancers Performance. 2 pm. Free

admission. Mount Dora Com-munity Center. 352-735-7180.

12 Summer Art Festival inside cool Lake Miona Recreation

Center, 1526 Buena Vista Blvd., The Villages. 9 am to 3 pm. Free admission. 352-430-0787.

12 TrueCouponing Coupon Class at Fighting Arts Emporium, 544

North U.S. Hwy. 27, Minneola. 10 am. Learn the basics. Free. 352-408–9460.

12 An Intimate Evening with Rick Derringer Concert. 7 pm. Rick

Derringer is best known for the hit “Hang on Sloopy,” recorded when he was lead singer of the McCoys and “Rock and Roll, Hoochie Koo” recorded in his solo career. Tickets: $25 to $75. Mount Dora Community Theater, Mount Dora. 352-383-2165.

17 Mount Dora Food Truck Bazaar. 5:30 pm. A variety of

foods will be available at this event. Mount Dora Chamber. 352-383-2165.

18 Downtown Summer Jams. 6 to 10 pm. Musicians will

showcase their talents and food trucks will be on hand. Citizens Circle, Downtown Ocala. 352-368-5517.

18 through Aug. 3 Theatre production of “All Shook Up.”

Sonnetag Theatre at the Icehouse, Mount Dora. 352-383-4616.

19 “Remembering Red.” A Tribute to Red Skelton. 7 pm. Red

Skelton tribute artist Brian Hoffman brings to life all of Red’s characters from the Golden Age of television. Tickets: $10 to $25. Mount Dora Community Theater. 352-383-2165.

19 Riverside Coffee with the Birds. At Silver Springs State

Park. Wear comfortable walking shoes and clothing suitable for the weather. Bring binoculars. Meet at the Silver River Museum. Bring your coffee cup. No pets, please. Third Sat. of the month. 8 am. 352-236-7148.

19 Play Disc Golf. At the Baseline Greenway Trail,

64th Ave. Trailhead, end of 64th Ave. Ocala. 9:45 am to 1 pm. Ocala Disc Golf Club. Experienced and beginners welcome. Club gathers at Hole #1. 352-236-7143.

26 Murder at the Inn (Engaging Murder Mystery Events!) Din-

ner Theatre with an evening filled with merriment and suspense as you help catch a murderer. 6 pm to 9:30 pm. Seven Sisters Inn, 828 E. Fort King St., Ocala. Tickets: $65. 352-433-0700.

31 through Aug. 3 “13: The Musi-cal.” 7 pm. Theatre production

at Ocala Civic Theatre, 4337 E. Silver Springs Blvd. $15. 352-236-2274.

Send Around Town news to News Connection USA, Inc., P.O. Box 638, Seffner, FL 33583; fax 813-651-1989 or email [email protected]. News must be received by the 10th of the month prior to event (i.e. July 10 for August event.)

Around TownW H A T ’ S H A P P E N I N G J U L Y 2 0 1 4


of 70. “Multi-generational households will increase further as the population ages and young adults move home, so that will mean more grandchildren will be involved in caregiving.” The Olsons are one of those multi-generational families. When Samantha Olson was eight years old, her grand-parents moved in next door so the fam-ily could care for her grandfather who has multiple sclerosis. Now in her early 20s and attending law school, Olson recognizes how lucky she was to grow up helping her grandfather. “As a fam-ily, we have been able to work together as a team to provide most of his care and that has meant a lot to all of us.”Young caregivers The way in which grandchildren care for grandparents varies considerably based on age and ability—and whether a parent is involved in taking care of grandma and grandpa. Older grandchil-dren may serve as primary caregivers and are sometimes forced to leave their jobs and postpone personal and professional ambitions. Activities can

range from everyday tasks like cook-ing meals and taking them to doctor appointments to more strenuous duties such as bathing and feeding loved ones. Even younger grandchildren can play an important role, which is frequently less defined than young and older adults, but kids and teenagers can make ordinary tasks an important part of the overall care. “Getting an occasional glass of water for grandma is not necessarily a caregiving task, but if a grandchild is asked to provide grandma with water on an hourly basis so she doesn’t become dehydrated then that becomes a caregiv-ing job,” explains Orel. “Some grand-children take on a lot of responsibility.” She remembers meeting one young grandchild who was the only one in her family who could understand grandma because her speech was extremely un-clear. Orel says, “In caregiving textbooks, that might not be listed as a caregiving task, but she became the interpreter and provided a very important need for grandma—and the entire family.” Caring for a grandparent often puts grandchildren in a challenging situa-tion—resulting in role conflicts and potential changes in the dynamic of the grandchild-grandparent relation-ship. Younger grandchildren still in school can be affected in different ways through missed classes, handing in late homework or not having time to do after-school activities.Abusive situations No matter what the age or circumstance, providing care to grandparents is extremely challenging and highly stress-ful. The experience can sometimes lead to abuse such as physical neglect and mistreatment or financial exploitation of the grandparent by family caregivers.

Bruce Crumpler, a 19-year veteran with Florida’s Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office, frequently sees seniors abused by family members. The most common instances are changing the Power of At-torney to steal money as well as physical neglect when the grandparent’s basic needs of feeding and washing are ignored. “Naturally, the grandparent trusts his or her family member, but sometimes that trust is abused to drain the person’s funds,” says Crumpler. “Whenever there is physical neglect or abuse there is a high percentage of financial abuse, but rarely the other way around.” If abuse is suspected by the vulnerable grandparent or friends and neighbors, there are a number of ways to take action, adds Crumpler. He sug-gests calling and reporting a situation anonymously to the Florida Abuse Hotline at 800-962-2873. A non-emergency call to the local sherriff’s office or police department is another way to report a situation. Crumpler adds: “It’s difficult to prove abusive situations, but the first step is report-ing them so they can be investigated.” Paul Wynn has covered healthcare trends for the past 20 years as a freelance writer.

As seniors live longer and multi-generational families become more common, grandchildren are playing a bigger role in caring for grandma and grandpa.

Helpful Resources: Elder Helpline toll-free at

1-800-96 ELDER (1-800-963-5337). Area Agency on Aging offices:

Lake/Marion Counties 352-378-6649

Hillsborough/Manatee Counties 813-740-3888

Pinellas/Pasco Counties727-570-9696

Lee/Charlotte/Sarasota239-652-6900

BY PAUL WYNN

For more than three years, Helen Hicks had been lovingly cared for

by her 43-year-old grandson, David Dunham, who balanced the demands of caregiving with his full-time position. Dunham was the primary caregiver to Grandma Helen who lived with the family because they couldn’t afford round-the-clock care. He received help from his wife, who had a full-time teaching position, and his mother, who is disabled and provided as much support as she could.

“Managing the stress related to daily caregiving is very challenging, but there are great rewards that come with the responsibility such as returning the love and care that my grandmother had unconditionally and generously given to me all my life,” says Dunham. Dunham is part of a growing group of grandchildren providing care to grandparents. An estimated 5.3 mil-lion, or eight percent of all caregivers over the age of 18, are grandchildren, according to a joint report by the Na-tional Alliance for Caregiving, AARP and MetLife Foundation. That number is estimated to be even higher since there are many individuals under age 18 who also provide care, says Nancy Orel, Ph.D, director of the gerontology program at Bowling Green State University in Ohio, who has studied the grandchildren-as-caregiver trend. She adds that close to four percent of families are multi-generational, so there’s a strong likelihood that grand-children are providing some assistance or care if the grandparent is over the age


CT and MR Angiography—Advanced VascularImaging for a More Complete Picture

Magnetic Resonance Angiography (MRA) and Computed

Tomography Angiography (CTA) are considered the most thorough and advanced methods of vascular imaging, successfully replacing invasive and riskier procedures like catheter angiography. MRA and CTA enable radiologists to achieve more reliable and consistent diagnosesof vascular diseases. MRA is a special type of magnetic resonance imaging test designed to evaluate arteries, veins and the flow of blood within them. It utilizes MRI technology to detect, diagnose and aid in the treatment of heart disorders, strokes and blood vessel diseases. It is an excellent diagnostic tool for evaluating the arteries serving the brain, neck, abdomen, kidney, pelvis and legs for stenosis (narrowing), plaque build-up, blockage, weakening and ballooning

before they cause a more serious medical condition. By conducting an MRA, surgical procedures may be avoided. “MRA can catch problems before they have a chance to result in a heart attack, stroke or other serious condition,” says RAO interventional radiologist Dr. Rolando Prieto. “When a problem is found, MRA is also useful in helping us deliver treatment directly to the affected area without the invasiveness, risks or recovery times associated with surgery.” No x-ray or radiation of any kind is used during an MRA exam, making it a safe choice for patients requiring repeated or follow-up testing. MRA is performed without the need for catheters, so there is no risk of damaging an artery. Contrast medium may be needed in certain cases. “MRA is an exceptionally safe and pain-free diagnostic and treatment tool,” says RAO interventional

radiologist Dr. Kareem Bohsali. “It is useful in not only discovering vascular disease, but also planning treatment and providing follow-up detail of a treatment’s efficacy.”

RAO offers MRA at three locations: Medical Imaging Center, Medical Imaging Center at Windsor Oaks and TimberRidge Imaging Center. When more detailed pictures of the arteries are needed, CTA is the

diagnostic tool of choice. What makes CTA a common follow-up test to MRA is its ability to capture tiny details and produce exceptionally crisp 360-degree views of arteries to help spot disease in its earliest stages and most intricate hiding places. CTA requires contrast medium to capture detailed pictures of blood vessels and tissues. Because it uses x-rays to help create computerized 3-D images, CTA involves some exposure to radiation. “When MRA shows possible disease, CTA provides the details needed to help pinpoint what, where and how extensive it is,” says RAO interventional radiologist Dr. Caleb Rivera. RAO offers CTA at two locations: Medical Imaging Center at Windsor Oaks and TimberRidge Imaging Center. For scheduling, please call RAO at 352-671-4300.

“What makes CTA a common follow-up test to MRA is its

ability to capture tiny details and produce exceptionally crisp 360-degree views of

arteries to help spot disease in its earliest stages and most

intricate hiding places.”

As an interventional and diagnostic radiologist, I provide a host of services – but all begin with a speedy and accurate diagnosis. I utilize the most effective procedures to unlock the mysteries behind disease, dysfunction and discomfort, and use my many years of experience working with both patients and doctors to help facilitate treatment. In many cases, I can treat disorders myself, safely and non-surgically using proven outpatient procedures.

Whatever issue presents itself, I have the experience and training to discover the root of it. Because removing the mystery behind a problem lays the groundwork for a solution.

DRIVEN TO DISCOVER

To me, there are no mysteries – just discoveries waiting to happen.As an interventional and diagnostic radiologist, I provide a host of services – but all begin with a speedy and accurate diagnosis. I utilize the most effective procedures to unlock the mysteries behind disease, dysfunction and discomfort, and use my many years of experience working with both patients and doctors to help facilitate treatment. In many cases, I can treat disorders myself, safely and non-surgically using proven outpatient procedures.

Whatever issue presents itself, I have the experience and training to discover the root of it. Because removing the mystery behind a problem lays the groundwork for a solution.

– just discoveries waiting to happen.As an interventional and diagnostic radiologist, I provide a host of services – but all begin with a speedy and accurate diagnosis. I utilize the most effective procedures to unlock the mysteries behind disease, dysfunction and discomfort, and use my many years of experience working with both patients and doctors to help facilitate treatment. In many cases, I can treat disorders myself, safely and non-surgically using proven outpatient procedures.

Whatever issue presents itself, I have the experience and training to discover the root of it. Because removing the mystery behind a problem lays the groundwork for a solution.Because removing the mystery behind a problem lays the groundwork for a solution. Because removing the mystery behind a problem lays the groundwork for a solution.Because removing the mystery behind a problem lays the groundwork for a solution.

I’m Dr. Mark A. Yap and I’m driven to discover quick and accurate answers.

We contract with a wide range of networks, including Medicare, Medicaid, and file all claims with the exception of non-contracted HMOs.

To me, there are no mysteries – just discoveries waiting to happen.– just discoveries waiting to happen.– just discoveries waiting to happen.As an interventional and diagnostic radiologist, I provide a host of services – but all begin with a speedy and accurate diagnosis. I utilize the most effective procedures to unlock the mysteries behind disease, dysfunction and discomfort, and use my many years of experience working with both patients and doctors to help facilitate treatment. In many cases, I can treat disorders myself, safely and

I’m Dr. Mark A. Yap and I’m driven to discover quick and accurate answers.

(352) 671-4300 n www.RAOcala.com

COMPREHENSIVE IMAGING SERVICES:

MRI n CT n PET/CT n DEXA n Nuclear MedicineX-ray n Angiography n Interventional RadiologyFluoroscopy n Ultrasound n Mammography

Like Us on Facebook facebook.com/raocala

Follow Us on Twitter twitter.com/raocala

DrYap_MatureLifestyles.pdf 1 5/20/14 9:27 AM


Healthy, cool and refreshing,

watermelon is summer’s perfect go-to snack. This versatile fruit makes drinks, appetizers and desserts into instant crowd-pleasers. Try these creative recipes

Watermelon Malibu Surf1 cup trimmed straw-

berries, cut in half1/2 cup coconut cream2 ounces spiced rum1 watermelon wedge for garnish1/2 cup sweetened whipped topping1 cup seedless watermelon chunksInstructions: Blend watermelon, strawberries, co-conut cream and rum just until smooth.

Place in freezer for one hour, stirring occasion-ally. Pour into chilled glass. Garnish with mini watermelon wedges and whipped topping. Serve immediately. Serves 1.

Watermelon Toasted Jalapeno and Shrimp Pico de Gallo2 Tbsp. canola or

vegetable oil1 Tbsp. minced seeded jalapeno3 Tbsp. minced fresh shallots1 Tbsp. minced fresh garlic1 teaspoon soy sauce

1 teaspoon ground cumin3 limes (juiced)2 cups minced watermelon2 cups chopped, cooked, cooled,

peeled and deveined shrimp1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley1 cup diced roasted red pepperGround black pepper to taste

Instructions: Heat the oil in a heavy non-stick skillet over medium high heat. Sauté the jalapeno, shallots, and garlic until golden and toasted around the edges. Remove from heat and add soy sauce and cumin. Cool. Scrape the cooled ingredients into a bowl and toss with lime juice, water-melon, shrimp, parsley and roasted pepper. Season with pepper to taste. Serve with chips and margaritas,fish tacos or atop grilled salmon.Serves 6 to 8

Watermelon Heaven1 1/2 cups sour cream1 teaspoon vanilla1/ 4 cup powdered

sugar1/ 4 cup toasted

almond slices7 cups watermelon

puree6 slices angel

food cakeInstructions: In a small bowl, mix together the sour cream, vanilla and powdered sugar. Stir in the toasted almonds. Place a one-cup pool of watermelon puree on each of 6 serving plates. Place a slice of cake on each pool. Drizzle the remaining watermelon puree over the top of the cake slices and then put a dollop of the sweetened sour cream with almonds on each serving as a garnish. Serves 6.

For more recipes, visit watermelon.org

Recipe

Thoughts on Retirement

Retirement: Coming! In the Third Act of life—You played by You!

Gonna be great if you get real, get per-sonal and get over yourself. Ta-dah! Some things to consider as you prepare for the Third Act of life:

• We are hardwired to be connected. There is a terrible risk of isolation with retirement and failing energy and so on in the Third Act of life, and one of your primary goals should be to stay involved—to connect to and care about others. Relationships often came as part of the context of the job when you were younger, but they are going to be primary in the Third Act. In fact, relationships are going to define the good life and what you actually fill your day with is going to be secondary.

• We are taught, if we do well, to be crazy about ourselves. It is one of the weird luxuries of success. Now, here’s some key advice for retirement: Get over yourself. Your ego-crazed self, anyhow. What will you do when the phone does not ring, the invitations do not pour in and you are not as funny as you used to be? The classic line is about the guy who gets up the day af-ter he retires and climbs into the back seat of the car. Only there’s no driver. Some of the most insufferable, most boring and most miserable people on

earth are former success stories, now retired. They build massive houses, strut out in the morning and wait for someone to care, which no one does. Which makes them behave even worse.• One of the great tests of real character is being able to adjust to a change

of station in life—to be satisfied with who you are, not your office. A lot of people at the end of their first careers are numb and go wander-ing off as if they’d been thrown out of the club or something. They think of retirement as a long vacation. It’s more than that, and chances are it’s going to last 20 or 30 years. It has to be substantive or you’re going to go nuts. Play is good, but all play is not going to work. • Sooner or later in life, you are almost certainly going to conclude

that family and friends count for far more than work. Losing track of or connection with family and real pals is a dreadful idea. A tragedy, in fact. The obvious advice: Treasure your friends. If you’re sore at this one and that for some reason, see if you can’t get over it. “Cherish the love more than resent the betrayals” is a good line and much of the time a good policy. Relationships require care and feeding or they’ll go away. Everything you care about requires care.• Success in retirement—the Great Play of your life—may very well

turn, in the end, on your flair for “giving a damn” about someone or something else. And connecting and commit-ting to them like crazy.

From “Thinner This Year” by Chris Crowley & Jen Sacheck.


The United States From A – ZBY VICTOR PARACHIN

America is a large, diverse, creative, energetic country. Take a look at an

A to Z glimpse of our great United States.Automobiles. Early factories started by Olds, Ford, Chevrolet, Chrysler and others were later influenced by Henry Ford’s assembly line produc-tion, cutting the cost and allowing families to be able to afford vehicles.Baseball. Nicknamed the “great American pastime,” the game hails back to 1839 in Cooperstown, NY.Constitution. It created the three branches of govern-ment to work in creative ten-sion to protect and enhance liberty for all Americans.Dollar. This basic unit of currencyhas stood the test of time.Edison. Life magazine ranked him as the most influential person of the last 1000 years for giving the world light.Frontier. Much American history is connected with people moving to the frontier, usually designated as the place west of where most people were living.Grand Canyon. Today, this great spot is as awe-inspiring as it must have been for the early people who saw it.Hollywood. Movies moved to Califor-nia to escape the powerful trust held by Thomas Edison, who controlled the right to early filmmaking equipment.Indians (Native Americans). The names of tribes have influenced names of states, cities, lakes, rivers and bays.Jazz. This American art form began when African American music met European music in 19th century New Orleans. It’s a style of music based on collaboration and improvisation.King. Using non-violent means, he led others to protest unfair treatment of African Americans.Language. Unlike many other nations, America does not have an official lan-guage though most people speak English.Motion Pictures. The first motion pictures took place at the Edison

laboratories at West Orange, N.J. in 1891 before 147 women from Mrs. Edison’s Women’s Clubs. National Parks. Today there are more than 50 national parks visited by millions of people. Oceans. From Coronado Beach in California to East Hampton in New York, and from Cocoa Beach in Florida to Waikiki in Hawaii, America has some of the world’s

best ocean beaches.Popcorn. This treat was introduced to the early Pilgrims by Native Americans. Quakers. This group came from England in the 1600s and is best known for their opposition to all wars.

Redwoods. These famous trees can live to be 2000 years old and grow to over 300 feet tall. Space Exploration. America has led the way in outer space exploration.Television. First introduced in the 1930s, Americans have been glued to the screens enjoying news, comedies, dramas, late night talk and more.Uncle Tom’s Cabin. Harriet Beecher Stowe’s book about the sufferingsof slaves was thought to be the startof the Civil War. Vote. The privilege granted by the 15th U.S. Constitutional amendmentwas granted to women by the 19thamendment in 1920.Washington, D.C. became the capital of the U.S. in 1800 when the govern-ment moved there from Philadelphia.eXports. America is known for exporting corn, cars, airplanes, computers, music and movies.Yellowstone. The first national park was dedicated in 1872 as a “public park for the benefit and enjoyment of the people.”Zipper. Invented in 1893, little use was found for this invention until it was used for WWI clothing and equipment. Victor M. Parachin is an ordained minister, full-time freelance writer and the author of several books.

Join the Chorus!The Marion Civic Chorale

will begin rehearsals for their 28th Season on August 11, 2014at 6:45 pm. Rehearsals are held at St. George Anglican Church, 5646 SE 5th St., Ocala, and new members arealways welcome. Call 352-537-8833 or visit MarionCivicChorale.tripod.com for more information.

Kick Up Some Summer SandVolleyball enthusiasts of all ages

are invited to the new Hickory Point Beach sand volleyball complex at 27341 State Road 19, Tavares. They will be holding a grand opening on July 5—an event that will feature adult and junior tournaments, competitive and recreational teams, food trucks, music, family entertainment and more. The event will kick off with a ribbon cutting ceremony at 9 am.

The sports venue, built on the shores of Lake Harris, will include profes-sional level net systems, 24 inches of top-grade sand, lights, permanent rest-rooms, free onsite parking, a children’s playground, outdoor showers, nature trail, swimming area, BBQ grills with picnic table, free boat ramp with dock access as well as additional amenities. For more info, or to register as a player, visit www.floridavolleyball.orgor call 352-742-0080.


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Consequences Come With Discovering the PastBY JONATHAN R. HUSBAND

Researching our past has become a favorite hobby. Technology al-

lows us to take action from the safety of home or to engage a private genea-logical researcher. Discovery of your past may bring big surprises. I recently delved into my past with an ignorance of the consequences. What I learned was not all pleasant. I would rather, however, discover the truth and work with the consequences than have the truth hidden from me. What the truth may do:

• Provide empathy: One year before my mother died at age 85, she told me the story of my birth that I still have difficulty comprehending and accept-ing. I am the product of a rape which occurred in July 1943 in war-torn England as Britain and its Allies were preparing to invade Nazi-occupied

Europe. My mother persevered and kept me after she dis-covered she was pregnant. I now feel a closer bond to those who were adopted as babies or who went through foster care. The word abor-tion also takes on a much more personal meaning. It is easy to sympathize or criticize ancestors using modern day measures when the events occurred under entirely different legal, medical, social or economic conditions. I still prefer to search to discover rather than to condemn and criticize, remembering that emotions come from discovery.

• Use caution about the truth. Check the facts and validate findings to separate opinion from fact. My mother told me that my father was a professor at Oxford University and that his wife was a world-renown opera singer. In fact Oxford University had no record of him, and apparently his wife was

the lead singer for a local oper-atic society. I discovered that my

father was a failed businessman, had faked his own suicide and ended his life living on his own

in an English council house.• Prepare to absorb family

surprises as you collect data. Expect the unexpected. Decide what to disclose and what to keep secret. Discovering your past helps you appreciate the many good fortunes that molded your future and helps you move on in life with equanimity. • Be sensitive to the emotions and anxieties you can create in others as a result of ancestral discoveries, and know that your relatives can also be impacted by new discoveries.Learning about my beginnings meant that those who had been my lifetime brothers and sisters suddenly became maternal half-brothers and half-sisters. You can experience a feeling of inadequacy when the

closeness of this relationship is undermined by biological separation.

• Think about how you are going torecord your discoveries. This can range from preparing a summary with related photos and source documents all the way to authoring a published memoir. It is easy to ignore the importance of this doc-umentation with the result that, while the knowledge can pass between generations, the evidence that supports this knowledge disappears. My mother stored away many documents that tracked her early life. When she died, these disappeared. Be forewarned that pursuing the knowledge of your ancestry unearths tales of riches and power, but it may also bring mental and emotional anguish. Jonathan R. Husband, a pseudonym, was born in York, England and spent much of his early life in remote areas of Yorkshire. Husband currently lives in Northern California. For more in-formation visit jonathanhusband.com.

Retirement Living

5 Inexpensive Items That Will Get You Ready for Disaster

What do you think constitutes a disaster? Certainly, people think

of hurricanes, tornadoes and wildfires. However, disasters also include events like extended power blackouts, house fires or floods. Disasters can happen anywhere, with little or no warning, but it’s possible to be prepared for them. Research from the Federal Emergen-cy Management Agency found that 85 percent of Americans are not prepared for potential disasters. It’s important for every household to have a disaster preparedness kit handy. Here are five inexpensive items that could protect you and loved ones in an emergency.Whistle: A simple whistle can be invaluable in a search-and-rescue scenario. Three short whistle blasts tell a rescue team that you are in danger—and the sound can carry for miles.Battery-free flashlight: A flashlight is a vital safety tool in the event of a power outage. You should never rely

on batteries that may be dead or de-pleted from years in storage. Instead, look for hand-cranked flashlights that will work when you need them.Dust masks: Protecting your lungs from airborne debris and toxins is essential in an emergency situation. First-aid kit: At a minimum, your first-aid kit should include bandages of varying sizes and antiseptic to help prevent infection. Consider having a family member trained in basic first aid. There are free and low-cost courses throughout the area.Trash bags: You can use trash bags in multiple ways. Not only can you use them to remove harmful debris, but in an emergency, you can wrap the trash bag around your body to keep warm. Emergency preparedness is crucial in hurricane-prone areas like Tampa Bay. You can also find free disaster plan-ning resources at goodandready.org.


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Veterans Corner

BY JANICE DOYLE

From hardtack to the MRE Ever since that first “line in the sand” at Lexington, Massachusetts, in the days of the American Revolution, commanders have been responsible for providing their soldiers with quality subsistence in a variety of environ-ments and tactical situations. From the first food program in 1775 to C Rations in WWII, Korea and Vietnam to MREs (Meals Ready to Eat) during Opera-tion Desert Storm to today, the military adapts to the soldier’s needs on the ev-er-changing battlefield or on-base mess hall. That’s not always an easy task.

From C-rations… In 1966, Frank Mitchell, or “Mitch” was drafted and ended up as a cook in Mannheim, Germany, for the 51st Transportation Co. when he was 19. He didn’t know anything about cooking, but says, “I seemed to have a knack for it, and I wanted to know more.” One day a month was C-ration Day when all mess halls were expected to cook every meal using the packaged rations left from WWII and Korean War days. “In the morning, we’d fry up rehydrated potatoes. There were scrambled reconstituted eggs. I always snuck in some real eggs so the guys would have a good breakfast. There’d be canned hot dogs for lunch. Oh, those were awful. Then we had a lot of rations we mixed for stews at night.” GIs everywhere remember “going on maneuvers.” For cooks like Mitch, it

meant packing up the kitchen, loading everything on trucks, driving to the field in the dark, setting up in the dark and then cooking breakfast to serve at 4 am. “Then we’d pack it back on the trucks, go back to the base and clean it all up and be inspected.” After his Army days, Mitch used the GI Bill to go to the Culinary Institute of America, newly opened overlook-ing the Hudson River in New York, and has spent his life as a chef.

…To MREs Recently, U.S. Marine cooks faced off in the challenge to transform mili-tary-issued field rations (MREs) into something palatable in a contest held at the National Museum of the Marine Corps. Here’s the question:

Well, is there a way to make an MRE taste like anything but a 1200-calorie pre-packaged meal intended to last for an indefinite number of years? The contestants each randomly picked an MRE packet and then brought out their small Ziploc bags of personally picked spices, Parmesan cheese, olive oil, garlic and secret spice combinations. They mixed their concoctions in a canteen cup and heated with Sterno to see who could make the best combination. Winner John Crist, a former Ma-rine, said his secret was “Tabasco, a lot more than I used last year.” A bystander did a taste test and declared: “The bottom line is, even with the effort they put into it, it was still an MRE. It still tastes like it has a shelf life of 10 years.” Some things never change.

Military Mess—Jazzing Up C-rations and MREs

A Soldier adds water to his MRE.A bunker-type mess hall; Korean War


Tips for Summer Foot CareBY STEVEN L. HADDAD, MD

Sandal weather is in full force here in Florida. Consider these tips for sum-

mer foot care, courtesy of the American Orthopaedic Foot & Ankle Society. Sporting sandals? Stability, support and protection should be top-of-mind when you’re sandal shopping. Look for a sandal with a low, stable sole and a heel cup that allows the sandal to remain well-aligned on your foot while you walk. A toecap will keep your toes from being stubbed. And don’t forget arch support, which helps distribute pressure evenly and makes sandals more comfortable. What about flip-flops? They’re everywhere, but flip-flops should not be worn as an everyday shoe. Flip-flops provide zero support for your feet and ankles, and their structure leaves you open to toe stubs and ankle injuries. Limit your flip-flop use to the poolside or for short strolls up the block. Never wear them on uneven terrain.

Pass the sunscreen. When you’re slathering on sunscreen everywhere else, remember your feet need sun protection, too. The upper surface of the foot generally lies perpendicular to the rays of the sun when standing. This positioning makes your feet susceptible to more ultraviolet radiation than other parts of the body. Rub sunscreen liberally over the tops and sides of the feet as well as in between toes. Creams generally are a better option than spray-on sunscreens, which may not cover all areas of your feet well enough. Remember to reapply sunscreen to feet and legs throughout the day, especially after swimming.

Open shoes equal dirt and dry-ness. Clean feet resist infections, so wash your feet carefully, including between your toes. Dry thoroughly with your own towel. If dryness develops, apply moisturizer to the soles and the tops of your feet.

Some pre-pedicure advice: Before heading to the salon, inspect your feet. If you find cracked skin, cuts or blisters, you should delay your visit until the skin is healed. These skin problems can provide an entry point for bacteria, which could lead to infection. Most nail salons are care-ful about cleaning footbaths between clients, but any bacteria that are left be-hind can cause infections in open skin.

Socks or no socks? It’s easy to slip in and out of canvas shoes in summer, but keep in mind that perspiration and bacteria quickly build up in shoes when you’re not wearing socks. If cotton socks are too much for you in warmer weather, try lightweight socks. Or choose light summer shoes with mesh uppers that can be washed easily to control bacteria growth and odor.

Watch those bare feet. When you’re at the beach, avoid walking barefoot along rocky shores or uneven surfaces. It’s easy to cut or bruise your feet or ankles when wading. And if you’re taking to the woods or wild grassy areas, cover your feet and legs with shoes and socks to prevent ticks from attaching to bare skin. Steven L. Haddad, MD, is an ortho-paedic foot and ankle surgeon with the Chicago-area Illinois Bone & Joint Institute and president of the American Orthopaedic Foot & Ankle Society (AOFAS). Check their website at www.aofas.org for more foot care info.


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Pain Doctor Discovers Circulation-BoostingMaterial In ‘Miracle Socks’ for Diabetics

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The 3D-weave technology usedin the material has been compared toinfrared light therapy to help revital-ize stiff and sore muscles. The man-ufacturer, who also makes a back andwrist sleeve, says the material pro-vides almost instant relief to any partof the body it touches, making it idealfor diabetics, athletes, inflammation,stiffness and swelling.

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Q. You know, I thought maturity with its wider perspective on life would

bring me some peace, but I’m more anxious now than when I was younger. Is that common among geezers?

Because the stresses of health prob-lems, losses and and other major

life changes build up as we get older, we tend to become anxious. Some surveys suggest that one in five older adults suffer anxiety symptoms that require treatment. In addition to psychological causes, medical disorders common in older adults can be directly responsible for the anxiety we feel. These include heart disease, neurologic illness, thyroid and other hormone problems. In addition,anxiety can be a drug side effect. And seniors take a lot of medicine.

Anxiety disorders in seniors have been underestimated for several reasons. One of the main reasons is that older patients are more likely to emphasize their physical complaints and downplay emotional problems. Anxiety disorders are serious medical illnesses that affect approximately 40 mil-lion American adults. They all involve ex-cessive, irrational fear. Anxiety disorders are chronic and can worsen if untreated. Panic disorder brings on sudden, un-predictable attacks of terror. These at-tacks create additional anxiety because victims worry about the next one. Old-er adults who get panic attacks usually had them when they were younger. The following are some symptoms: pounding heart, perspiration, dizziness, fainting, numb hands, nausea, chest pain, feeling that you’re smothering, fear of loss of control, a sense that you’re losing your mind or about to die. If you have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), you may be haunted by unwelcome thoughts or the need to engage in rituals. You may be obsessedwith germs or dirt, so you wash your hands repeatedly. You may feel the need to check things repeatedly.

The disturbing thoughts are called obsessions, and the rituals that are per-formed to try to prevent or get rid of them are called compulsions. Victims of OCD consume at least an hour a day with their compulsions. Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can develop after a frightening experi-ence. Often, people with PTSD have repeated memories of the experience both during their waking hours and in nightmares. A person having a flash-back may believe that the event is real. Victims of PTSD may have trouble sleeping, feel detached or be easily startled. They may have intimacy problems. They can be-come aggressive or even violent. Social phobia, also called social anxiety disorder, involves excessive self-consciousness in social situations. People with social phobia are afraid of being judged by others and being embarrassed by their own actions. Social phobics can be afraid of one type of situation or they may experi-ence symptoms almost any time they are around other people. Symptoms include blushing, sweating, trem-bling, nausea and difficulty talking. A specific phobia is an exaggerated fear of one thing. Some of the more common specific phobias are trig-gered by heights, animals such as snakes, closed spaces and flying. Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) means excessive worry about a variety of things or life in general. People with GAD expect the worst and seem unable to relax. Often, they have trouble falling or staying asleep. Anxiety disorders are treated with medication and psychotherapy. Both approaches can be effective for most disorders. Anxiety disorders are not all treated the same, so it is important to determine the specific problem first. Although medications won’t cure an anxiety disorder, they can keep the symptoms under control and enable people to have normal lives. If you would like to ask a question, write to [email protected] Rights Reserved © 2014 by Fred Cicetti.

The Healthy GeezerBY FRED CICETTI

Anxiety


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BY MR. BRIAN HAYDEN, Visit Buffalo-Niagara

Buffalo, New York is a vibrant city filled with lots to do and discover.

At the Albright-Knox Art Gallery, you can see one of the world’s most impressive collections of modern and contemporary art and then find the art of Buffalo and Western New York at the Burchfield Penney Art Center. Architecturally, look for buildings by Frank Lloyd Wright, Louis Sullivan, H.H. Richardson, Richard Upjohn, and Eliel and Eero Saarinen.

Buffalo’s emerging Canalside district showcases the city’s waterfront and proud history of shipping along Lake Erie and the Erie Canal. The center-piece of this district is the western terminus of the Erie Canal dating from 1825 that has been re-excavated and restored. A system of bike trails, parks and boardwalks comprise Buffalo’s Outer Harbor and offer stunning views of the lake and city skyline. On the subject of history, you can stand where Teddy Roosevelt took the oath of office at the recently reno-vated Theodore Roosevelt Inaugural National Historic Site or learn about Buffalo’s Native American, ethnic and industrial heritage at the Buffalo History Museum. Mark Twain was a newspaper editor here; leaves from the original manuscript of the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn are on display in

the Mark Twain Room at downtown’s central library. The city is also filled with African American heritage; for starters, Duke Ellington, Dizzy Gillespie and other giants of jazz performed at the Colored Musicians Club, which is now a museum and still hosts regular gigs by area musicians. If performing arts are your thing, Buffalo has some two dozen theaters, anchored by the magnificent Shea’s Performing Arts Center, which hosts a Broadway Series and the Buffalo Philharmonic Orchestra.

Buffalo Wings While Buffalo is justifiably proud of its chicken wings (and no trip to Buffalo is complete without a stop at the Anchor Bar, where wings first took flight 50 years ago this year), we also have 400 independently-owned restaurants, delicious local specialties, wine trails and farmers markets. Buffalo is also home to several breweries, including Flying Bison Brewing Co. and Hamburg Brewing Company. The first distillery in Buffalo since Prohibi-tion, Lockhouse Distill-ery, opened in 2013. Sports fan? Buffalo has a wealth of options, including the NFL’s Bills, NHL’s Sabres, AAA baseball’s Bisons, world-class fishing, great skiing and fantastic watersports. Or perhaps you’ll enjoy kayaking or rock climbing in the city. Natural splendor can be found at the Tifft Nature Preserve, the Buffalo and Erie County Botanical Gardens and other parks and parkways throughout Buffalo.

Military buffs will be amazed at the submarine, destroyer and cruiser per-manently docked at the Buffalo harbor, part of the Buffalo and Erie County Naval and Military Park, the largest inland naval park in the country. And Buffalo seems to have a festival

for everything, ranging from the National Buffalo Wing Festival to the Allentown Art Festival to the Taste of Buffalo. Or come for the GardenWalk Buffalo free garden tour, the Erie County Fair or any of a host of ethnic celebrations, from St. Patrick’s Day parades to the Galbani Buffalo Italian Heritage Festival or Dyngus Day, the day after Easter Sunday, when polka

bands, Polish food and a parade ring in the end of the Lenten season. If incredible entertainment, dining, art and culture aren’t enough for you, we have one of the wonders of the world—Niagara Falls—just

20 minutes away with the famous Cave of the Winds or a Maid of the Mist boat tour. For more information, go to visitbuffaloniagara.com or contact Visit Buffalo Niagara at 1-800-BUFFALO.

Travel

The Canalside District

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Shea’s Performing Arts Center

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Last Month’s Answers June Sudoku

William Coker is last month’s winner! Congratulations!

July Sudoku Sudoku requires no arithmetic skills.The object of the game is to fill all the blank squares with the correct numbers. Each row and each column of 9 numbers must include all digits 1 through 9 in any order. Each 3 by 3 subsection of the 9 by 9 square must include all digits 1 through 9 as well. The first correct answers selected from the drawing on July 21 will win. Good luck!

Mystery Prize!

Send your answers along with your name, address and telephone number to: NEWS CONNECTION USA, INC

P.O. BOX 638, SEFFNER, FL 33583WIN! WIN! WIN! GREAT PRIZES!(Sudoku must be received by July 21, 2014.)

Word Search JulyIn the grid below, twenty answers can be found that fit the category for today. Circle each answer that you find and list it in the space provided at the right of the grid. Answers can be found in all directions – forwards, backwards, horizontally,

vertically and diagonally. An example is given to get you started. Can you find the twenty answers in this puzzle?

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Prosperous Gaffes Do Happen

BY MARK PILARSKI

Dear Mark: I enjoy your column very

much, mostly because you spent a lot of time on the inside. Here is my question. I was wondering if you have ever given away money to a player that did not deserve it. A dealer on a blackjack game once claimed it never happens, and yet, he overpaid me twice in two hours. I was wondering if you could share your thoughts on this. —Ralph I.

Have I, Ralph, ever given away money to a player who didn’t de-serve it? Oh, gosh yes! I have made my fair share of blunders, once involving a $7,000 overpay-ment. Aided by the eye-in-the-sky, the casino caught it and recouped their seven grand. Still, I received a non-paid week on the streets. A few more bloopers to come below First off, dealers can and do make mistakes. Whoever told you otherwise is full of it. True, most dealers get quite skillful at reading the patterns on the cards with proficiency. So counting errors, with experience, become rare. But these guys and gals deal more than a half million hands a year, so they will make unpremeditated errors over the course of that time, both on the play-er’s credit and debit side of the ledger. Casino management is supposed to be on the lookout for dealers making paying errors, and it is their responsi-bility to correct these transgressions. It is their job to monitor “their” pit and make sure that “their” dealers are following the right dealing pro-tocols and paying off bets correctly. But apparently not yours. So, Ralph, you got away with a couple freebies. That’s fine. From a retired black-jack dealer’s perspective, I was always appreciative of the player who corrected my pay mistakes and handed back the money. I still play by those principled rules to this day. Now—those two dillies I promised.

I taught myself blackjack by pitching cards into a hat, and practiced shuffling, dealing and

the pay and take on an ironing board. On my first shift, I made the dim-witted decision that if

you split aces and got two face cards, you just got yourself two blackjacks, so I paid accordingly. I was actu-ally paying this unmerited royalty on split aces for most of my first shift until an old-time pit boss noticed my generosity and corrected me at the break. Some joints might have sent me packing, but perchance he prob-ably thought that I had the potential to do the job a chimp could do. The other was where I wittingly over- or under-paid a player. Dealing 10¢ roulette in downtown Reno, we would get a lot of Chinese players via a charter bus service out of San Francisco who would jam up a game with chips like nothing you could ever imagine. As 8 is the most prosperous of numbers in Chinese culture, it is considered a highly lucky number and is worked into daily life as much as possible. The roulette table was one such place, times ten. It was always mathematically interesting when a kazillion chips would appear on the 8 from all the corners, split pos-sibilities, and straight up bets tower-ing what seemed like a foot high. This required drastic measures to avoid a possible mathematical misad-venture, or my job, so I once called over a pit boss – actually it was a shift manager passing through the pit – and in order to not look too much like a sap, I asked what he thought a particular payoff was. Pretend-ing to know the correct payoff, he said, “Send out a dozen stacks, plus put a $5 chip and a 50¢ piece on the top.” I paid the bet as instructed. Although a patented move by another, not a bad “go to” action when this fraz-zled dealer of ten minds couldn’t figure out a ginormous payout. No harm, no foul, is what he figured, plus, we always seemed to get back all the chips in the end anyway. (SENIOR WIRE)

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4th of July HumorA few quotes:

“If you buy your July 4 supplies at Walmart, you can celebrate

our independence from Britain and dependence on China at the same time.” —Andy Borowitz, satirist “Dear America, Happy Independence day and thanks for running the world since we retired. (China wants the job, but hang in there.) Love, England.” —Ricky Gervais, British comedian

“Happy Birthday USA! If we’d never rebelled against England we’d all be playing soccer, driving on the left side and watching the UK Office on TV.”—Rainn Wilson, from TV’s “Office” show “Happy 4th of July, although I don’t support celebrating a bunch of rebels defeating an empire.” —Darth Vader

More fun stuff:Fred: Which famous person do you get when you make a wreath out of $100 bills?Joe: This one is a toughy.Fred: Aretha Franklin!Teacher: Johnny, what are the last words of “The Star-Spangled Banner?”Johnny: “Play ball?”Harry: What do you call an American drawing?John: What?Harry: Yankee doodle!Alvin: My great-grandfather fought with Napoleon, my grandfather fought with the French and my father fought with the Americans.Alex: Your relatives couldn’t get along with anyone, could they?Pedro: What was the patriots’ favorite food in the Revolutionary War?Ordep: I don’t know. What?Pedro: Chicken Catch-a-Tory!

Humor

Whether you know him as Batman,the Caped Crusader or the Dark

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Senior Connection • June 2005 • page 36

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by the 15th of the month will appear in the following issue. No more than three ads will be accepted each month per person. The editor reserves the right to edit any ads for

space or content. In order to protect our readers’ privacy, we will not include phone numbers, e-mail or home addresses in the ad copy. City or area included at no charge.

Kitten Call To Action!It’s raining cats, and that’s a

problem this time of year for shelters across Central Florida. During kitten season, which spans from spring until fall, shelters will be flooded with kittens, many of whom are too young to be adopted but are eligible to go to temporary foster homes. Young kittens can be relatively easy to care for at home, as they can be housed in a spare room, laundry room or bathroom.

Foster families are needed to house these young animals for a short time until they are old enough to be re-turned to the shelter and be offered for adoption. Training is available through Lake County’s Volunteer Program for those interested in fostering cats or dogs by filling out an application at www.lakecountyfl.gov/volunteer. To find out more, visit lakecountyfl.gov/adopt or call 352-343-9688.

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American ContractBridge League

Find The Lady

BY BRIAN GUNNELL

With both sides vulnerable, East opened 3♣ (a weak bid, usu-

ally made with a 7-card suit), and South wound up declaring 6♠. East’s Ace won the opening Club lead and the next Club was ruffed by Declarer. Trumps were drawn in four rounds, East following once and then pitching three Clubs. Now all that remained was for Declarer to avoid losing a trick to the ♦Q. Was it a guess, or was it a certainty? When the hand was actually played, our Declarer was familiar with the idea that, with a 9-card fit, it was customary to cash the Ace and King (playing for the Queen to drop in two rounds) rather than finessing. But (unfortunate-ly) he remembered that East’s bidding

had shown a long Club suit, and this persuaded him that West was therefore

more likely to hold longer Diamonds. Accordingly, he cashed the ♦K, planning to finesse on the next round if West followed with a low Diamond. Poor Declarer got a nasty shock when, instead, West showed out and it was East who turned out to have the Diamond length. Down two (East still has a Club winner and the trumps are all gone) in a cold slam! Declarer should have gone fishing for extra clues before taking the crucial Diamond guess.

If (after drawing trumps) he cashes three Hearts first, East will show out on the third round. Now Declarer has a perfect count on the hand. East started with one Spade, two Hearts and (based on the bidding and the play) seven Clubs. That means East has three Diamonds, and leading a Diamond to Dummy’s Ace, and finessing on the second round, is guaranteed to succeed. Visit acbl.org for more about the fascinating game of bridge or email [email protected]. To find a bridge club in Florida, go to district9acbl.org/D9Clubsmap.htm. Bridge article provided courtesy of St. Petersburg Bridge Club: stpetebridge.org.

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Documents

Lifestyles After 50 Marion/Lake/Sumter July 2014 edition