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Neurotic Needs
• Affection and approval
• Partner to take over one’s life
• Restrict one’s life within narrow boundaries
• Power, control over others, and façade of omnipotence
• Exploit others and get the better of them
• Social recognition or prestige
• Personal admiration
• Personal achievement
• Self-sufficiency and independence
• Perfection and unassailability
Neurotic Needs and Personality Disorders
• Affection and approval
• Partner to take over one’s life
• Restrict one’s life within narrow boundaries
• Power, control over others, and façade of omnipotence
• Exploit others and get the better of them
• Dependent, Histrionic, Borderline, Narcissistic
• Dependent, Borderline
• Dependent, Avoidant, Paranoid
• Antisocial, Narcissistic, Borderline, Paranoid, Histrionic, Obsessive Compulsive
• Antisocial, Narcissistic, Borderline
Neurotic Needs and Personality Disorders
• Social recognition or prestige
• Personal admiration
• Personal achievement
• Self-sufficiency and independence
• Perfection and unassailability
• Narcissistic, Histrionic
• Narcissistic, Histrionic
• Antisocial, Narcissistic
• Avoidant, Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal
• Narcissistic, Borderline, Avoidant
Theory
• Have an innate drive for positive personal growth (self realization)– Pathological behavior results when this is blocked
• Disturbed interpersonal relationships are at the core of all healthy and unhealthy (neurotic) personality functioning
Theory
• Neurotics show patterns of extreme and inflexible approaches to handling interpersonal relationships
– “…the center of psychic disturbances are unconscious strivings developed in order to cope with life despite fears, helplessness, and isolation. I have called them “neurotic trends” [neurotic needs].
Theory
• Safety and satisfaction are the two primary needs
• Under ideal conditions, a child will feel loved, protected, and safe
• Under less than ideal conditions, a child feels vulnerable, helpless and abandoned producing basic anxiety
– “the feeling a child has of being isolated and helpless in a potentially hostile world”
– Is the result of parental indifference
• Called this “the basic evil”
• As much perception as intention
Theory
• Parental indifference and the conflict it produces results in
defensive ways of perceiving oneself.– Despised real self (fallible true self)
• Repressed hostility turns toward self and further proves ones unworthiness and sense of being unlovable
– Self contemot
• Six major ways of manifestation:
Theory
• Relentless demands on self– “Tyranny of the should”
• Merciless self-accusation – Constantly berate self
• Self-contempt– Ridicule that prevents striving for improvement or achievement
• Self-frustration– Don’t believe we deserve to enjoy things
• Self-torment– Inflict harm and suffering on self
• Self-destructive actions and impulses– Overeating, addictions, reckless behavior
Theory
• Then create the image of the idealized or ideal self to defensively restructure the despised real self
• The drive toward actualizing the ideal self is called the neurotic search for glory.
• Manifests as:
– Need for perfection
» Attempt to mold the whole personality into the idealized self
» “Tyranny of the should”
Theory
• Manifests itself (cont)
– Neurotic ambition
» Compulsive drive toward superiority
» Although desire to excel at everything, often channeled into area most likely to succeed
– Drive toward a vindictive triumph
» “its chief aim is to put others to shame or defeat them through one’s very success; or to attain the power…to inflict suffering on them – mostly of a humiliating kind”
» Most destructive of the three
Theory
• Later added :– Real self
• True core of persons being
• Contains all potential of growth and health (possible self)
• Damaged by parental indifference
• Alienation from this and adoption of the idealized self is called the core neurotic conflict
Theory
• Basic anxiety around parental indifference makes the child angry and resentful toward parents
• Called this basic hostility
• Creates conflict and anxiety for child
– Child needs parents and wants to approach them
– On the other hand hates them and wants to punish them
• This is the basis of neurosis
Theory
• A child deals with this by adopting one of three
relationship strategies:– Accentuate dependency and move toward the parents
– Accentuate hostility and move against the parents
– Give up on the relationship and move away from the parents
• Calls these the basic conflict
Theory
• Moving Toward People: “If you love me, you will not hurt me” – Compliant Personality
• Intense needs for affection and approval
• Need for a partner
• Need to restrict ones life within narrow boundaries
• Goal is to achieve harmony with others and avoid friction
Theory
– Compliant Personality
• May mask underlying feelings of need to compete, excel, and dominate, or feelings of rage, anger and hostility
• Called this the self-effacing solution
– The ideal self is the despised self
– Qualities of suffering, helplessness and martyrdom
Theory
• Moving against people: “ If I have power, no one can hurt me”– Aggressive Personality
• Need for control and power as protection against feelings of helplessness
• Need to excel by exploiting others
• Success and prestige are measures of their self worth
• Driven by insecurity, anxiety, and hostility
• Called this the expansive solution
– Ultimate attempt to actualize the ideal self
Theory
• Moving away from people: “If I withdraw, nothing can hurt me”– Detached personality
• Detached from human affairs
• Resigned to an emotionally flat life
• Protection from being hurt by others
• Intense needs of self sufficiency and perfection
Theory
– Detached personality
• Narrow limits of life so that will not have to be dependent on others
• Remove selves from “inner battlefield” of their own conflicts
• Called this the solution of resignation
Theory
• Healthy people move between these and use what is appropriate when needed
• Neurotics mainly emphasize one of the Neurotic solutions– Two less emphasized remain at work in the unconscious
Auxiliary Conflict Solutions
• Creation of Blind Spots– Type of denial
– Refusal to see the discrepancy between their behaviors and the idealized self
Auxiliary Conflict Solutions
• Compartmentalization– Life compartmentalized with different rules for each
– What happens in one has not effect or link to another
– Situational ethics
• Rationalization– Using logical, plausible, but inaccurate excuses to justify one’s
perceived weaknesses, failures, or inconsistencies.
Auxiliary Conflict Solutions
• Excessive self control– Avoidance of emotions (good or bad)
• Arbitrary rightness– Because of difficulty in taking action, will appear to arbitrarily
make decisions (showing one is arbitrarily right or in charge)
(dogmatism)
Auxiliary Conflict Solutions
• Elusiveness– Postpones making any decisions, voice any opinions, etc.
– If I am not committed to anything, I can’t be wrong; If I am not wrong I can’t be criticized
• Cynicism – Doesn’t believe in anything
– By not believing in anything, I am immune to the disappointment of being committed to something shown to be false.