Describe the above image by SHOWING me what it looks like. Remember, use words that appeal to your five senses (sight,

sound, taste, touch, or smell) and DO NOT use "is" or "was" in your description (use vivid action verbs instead). Also use at

least one simile or metaphor.

Attention Getter Suspense

Irony

Foreshadow

Rising Action

Simile

Metaphor

Imagery

Imagery

Simile

Figurative Lang.

Irony

Imagery

Imagery

Flashback

Climax

Imagery

Falling Action

Resolution

·Amateur writes: Bill was nervous.

·Professional: Bill sat in a dentist’s waiting room, peeling the skin at the edge of his thumb, until the raw, red flesh began to show. Biting the torn cuticle, he ripped it away, and sucked at the warm sweetness of his own blood.

Using Imagery and Sensory Details

·Amateur: “Mary was tired.”

·Professional: “Mary shuffled into the kitchen, yawning and blinking. Collapsing into a chair, she closed her eyes, crossed her arms for a pillow, and slowly tucked her head onto the fold.”

Using Imagery and Sensory Details

·Amateur: J was nervous.

·Professional: “So now my mouth gets dry and my hands start to shake..."

Using Imagery and Sensory Details

Your turn again!Pretend you are a person suffering from one of the phobias below. Describe

what you see and how you feel. Make sure to use similes & metaphors. Remember, show us, don't tell us. Don’t use “was” and “were” or "am" and "is"

in your descriptions—this usually leads to telling.

arachibutyrophobia - fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of one's

mouth ornithophobia - fear of birds

3. Now decide which of these WHAT IF? situations would be the worst possible situation your character could be in. You can add some more details to the situation at this point.

4. So now it's time to decide:Who is your protagonist?

Where and when is the story taking place?

5. Write the Climax! Now that you’ve the decided the worst possible situation your protagonist could be in and you know a little bit about your him/her, describe what happens. Remember, SHOW, don’t tell! Use imagery, details, and figurative language. Paint a picture in my mind!

More CLIMAX examples...from students like you!

What If? = What if I had a phobia of heights & someone took my skydiving for a surprise?

The sky streched from one side of my vision to the other, in blues and pinks. Sun rays were reflecting off the metallic silver of the sky diving plane. Fear swelled in my chest, taking the place of oxygen as I gazed upon my doom. The feeling of falling erupted in my stomach, which I didn't enjoy very much. I can pretty much do anything, but this was out of the questionn. My phobia had gotten way worse than it was before. Heights were still my enemy. My heartbeat pounded loudly in my ears as I looked around the interior of the plane. There was Natasha, talking to the expert that is apparently coming with us. I tried to call out to Natasha, but my dry throat refused. Luckily, she turned toward me, a completely innocent smile on her face.

"Oh my gosh, Shelby, this is going to be so fun!" she said with a tiny squeal that reminded me of a little girl at Christmas.

She hugged me and handed me a vest that contained a parachute and an emergency parachute the size of a backpack. How was this tiny contraption supposed to help keep me from falling to my doom?

"N-Na-tasha, are you sure this is a good idea?" I managed to ask over the rushing of the wind.

"You'll be fine, trust me," she said kindly, as she helped me put my vest on.

I watched as she professionally put on her own. Finally, we stood at the door and waited for so long it felt like it was my twenty-fourth birtday instead of my fourteenth! The expert finally told us to jump on the count of three.

"One, two...," the expert was about to send me to my death!

I began frantically yanking on my parachute and lurching for the back of the plane. There was no way this was going to happen. The parachute seemed to grow little arms and legs, wrapping around me like I used to do to my dad when he told me my ride on his shoulders was over. My battle with nausea ended in one swift battle and I felt my stomach acid burn my throat and nose before the parachute sucked all the breath out of me.

More CLIMAX examples...from students like you!

What If? = What if I have a phobia of bugs and I came home from school and there is an exterminator parked outside?

I was walking home when I turned down my street, I smelled something funny. It smelled like a mixture of cleaning supples and something unfamiliar...and unpleasant. Maybe eggs? I considered. Whatever it was, it was a very strong smell. I continued walking down my street, humming to the tune of some random song we had played in band that day.

The smell kept getting stronger. Dang, what is this smell? My nose was burning and even starting to run a little. My eyes kept welling up too, causing me to have to keep wiping my face with my sweatshirt sleeve. As I got closer I saw a huge truck parked close to my house. It was bright yellow and dirty looking with bright orange lettering, but I couldn't read it from that far away. There were a bunch of tubes coming out of the truck, and there were also a number of men in astronat looking suits the same bright orange as the lettering.

I got closer. I squinted to read the disturbing truck. Bob's Exterminators I mouthed, my jaw dropping to my knees. I don't know when I stopped walking, but I must've been standing there for a while because my mom yelled to me from the front yard to see why I wasn't coming home. Now it was no longer my runny nose drenching my face, but a cold sweat seeping out of every pore. My heart stopped for the third time that day and I fought a horrible urge to break into the house in front of me and sink myself into their pool, clothes and all. Why was the truck parked in front of my house?!