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The thing that makes street game difficult is that girls are in motion and going to a
specific location, so you have to make the decision to stop the girl or walk with her, and
what you ultimately decide is based on the compliance level of the set.
If you think you can stop the girl,
do it. If there are multiple girls,
stop the front one. If you choose
to walk with, then walk with
either the front girl or your
target. Use your judgment.
Also, it’s very important to find
out what a girl’s time constraint
is. It may be that you have thirty
seconds to talk to a girl, or she may have only thirty seconds to talk to you—or maybe
she has all day. The key question for finding out how much time you have is: “What are
you doing this exact second?”
These venues are similar to the
street, with the exception that
people usually have a little longer
to hang out—especially in the case
of a mall. That said, still bear in
mind stopping vs. walking with,
and be very cognizant of what a
girl’s time constraint is.
And though it may make you uncomfortable to go into a store just to approach a girl, it’s
probably easier because you won’t have to stop her. Just make sure you do the
approach in a way that you don’t let on that you thought it was awkward. Also, try to
catch girls when they’re not “engaged in the wheels of capitalism” (so not when actively
buying or talking to a store clerk) but instead when they’re browsing or just walking
around. Interrupting business transactions is a good way to offend people—or even be
removed from the premises.
In these two types of locations, you have two massive advantages.
1. Girls will often be in a fixed area, so you won’t have to stop them.
2. Girls are almost always in leisure time, so you’ll have a longer window
to get to know them and convey your personality.
Try for a fun, casual, non-‐rushed vibe. Join the girl or her and her group, sit with them,
and join in whatever activity, if possible. Find out the time frame, but assume you have
more time to work with than in other locations.
Also, a specific note for girls in bikinis or girls sunbathing: if you are normal about them
being half-‐clothed, they will be normal too. If it seems like a big deal to you, it will be
awkward for them.
Here you have more inherent
advantages: the girl will almost
always be sitting—or standing in
line with you—so you have easy
logistics for the approach. The
thing that can make this
approach difficult is that the girl
will sometimes be busy doing
something, so you might literally be interrupting. Or, what’s maybe more important, is
most guys will feel like they’re interrupting, especially when there are onlookers.
You need to understand that if you’re trying to make an interaction non-‐awkward, you’ll
almost certainly make it awkward. It’s best to just assume that doing the approach is
normal, and then calibrate if necessary. Then, if the social pressure of onlookers turns
out to be an issue for the girl, it’s okay for you to apologize for startling her. But never
apologize for yourself or act like doing the pickup itself was wrong in any way.
Here your advantage, again, is that the girl is not on “work time” (unless maybe she’s
frantically grabbing books for a term paper). So girls in these venues do have a little
more freedom and, usually, willingness to hang out.
The biggest thing working against you
here is that speaking loudly is
considered rude, or that this is a study
time not to be interrupted. So think of
these places like you would the café—
but more so. Do the approach in a
way that you assume is non-‐awkward
(though don’t be over-‐the-‐top) and be
willing to apologize if necessary, but again, never apologize for yourself or the approach.
For all public transit, realize
that the easiest way to start
the interaction is before you
get on the bus, train, or
airplane—whether you’re at
the bus station, on the
subway platform, or in the
terminal. It’s obviously key
to sit/stand next to or near the object of your affection and, ideally, start talking
immediately when you sit (or stand). The longer you’re next to a girl in awkward silence,
the more difficult the entire interaction will be.
One special note on airplanes is that you have less direct communication because there
are assigned seats, so unless you hope to get lucky and sit next to the hot girl at your
gate, start the interaction in the terminal and then make the suggestion to sit next to
her on the plane. It helps if you have an aisle or window seat, because most people will
readily switch seats with you.
Also, in all three cases, adjust to the time commitment. Gaming on a sixteen-‐hour flight
is obviously different from gaming on a thirty-‐second subway ride. And, of course, find
out what travel plans you’re dealing with.
The gym is great because attractive girls usually
go to gyms; what’s not great is that girls in gyms
are pretty much always in the middle of
something. So, if possible, you want to approach
them in a non-‐annoying way. Open when they
are between sets or exercises, and use a time
constraint. Do not make them feel like you’re
going to be there all day.
Also, most people go to the same gym over and over, so if that’s the case, it helps to end
your interactions on a positive note. Because one, you may see the girl again, and two, if
you become an approach machine at the gym, you might earn a reputation. So you want
to approach in a fun, friendly way—not a polarizing, burn-‐it-‐to-‐the-‐ground kind of way.
This is the ultimate casual, friendly situation in which girls have time, which is obviously
to your benefit. The secret here is not to treat your interaction like a pure cold
approach. Assume the girls will be friendly. Talk and mingle with a lot of people, and
build a social vibe instead of trying to be a sniper.
The same concept goes on a more macro scale for campuses, where you’re building a
vibe and reputation over an extended period of time, as opposed to just one event.
These girls can be difficult, but they can
also be some of the most rewarding
because they’re often by definition hot.
The key thing to understand here is that
they are working, and they can get in
trouble if talking to you interferes with
that. Most girls probably aren’t willing
to lose their jobs to talk to a stranger.
However, you do have an advantage, which is that they are almost obligated to talk to
you and be friendly. So the plan of action here is to time constrain yourself and run the
set more quickly. You probably won’t have an hour to build a deep connection with a
girl, but if you grab her attention quickly and close on a high note, you can continue the
interaction later on in a positive way.
It’s also important in many instances to avoid the “customer” frame*; you want to make
it clear that you’re not there looking to buy something, but that you’re being social and
fun. Some girls have specific rules about not dating customers and may not go along
with this, but that’s just part of the game and something you’ll have accommodate. In
most cases, if your vibe is excellent, you can overcome this.
*Although, sometimes you can fake the customer frame in front of a girl’s manager to
1). buy yourself time, 2). avoid getting her in trouble, and 3). create an us vs. the world
frame.