Building Bridges for Grieving Children and Their Families

Andy McNiel, MA, LPC

“…being at the bottom of the ocean…everything is

foreign to you and you feel like you don’t belong and

you are all alone.”

“…a big empty hole in your heart…a void that

cannot be filled.”

“…a bad dream…really your worst nightmare. You just

can’t believe it is happening to you.”

“…a ship that has lost it’s anchor and is tossing about

on a chaotic ocean.”

Childhood Grief: Cultural Beliefs

“Children are resilient.”

Children want to be resilient• Kind Loving Adults• Discipline• Acknowledgement

“Kids can be so resilient if we as

parents help them instead of

ignoring the issue of grieving.”

National Parent’s Poll - 2011

Childhood Grief: Cultural Beliefs

“Let’s talk about something else.”

Avoidance = Alone• Respect Boundaries• Provide Opportunities• Answer Questions• Share Stories

Childhood Grief: Cultural Beliefs

“You have to talk about it.”

Overbearing = Intimidating• Personality/Temperament• Being Present• Let the Child Lead

Childhood Grief: Cultural Beliefs

“You can’t handle the truth.”

Lying = Mistrust• Tell the Truth• Age Appropriate

Childhood Grief: Cultural Beliefs

“Time heals all wounds.”

Time & Action

“Children do not ‘get over’ their loss after a few years, because every new milestone in their life reinforces the

loss that they have endured.”

National Parent’s Poll - 2011

"A person's a person, no matter how small.“

-Dr. Seuss

We do not have the power to…

…remove grief and pain

We do have the power to…

…walk with others…share life with others…encourage others