04 OSHO WORLD 35JULY 2008

Whenever there

is a child, there is

bound to be

some conflict

between the

child and the

parents,

particularly

between the

child and the

mother in the

beginning, and

then later on

with the father

-Osho

Everybody knows that good parents are dangerous parents. A

parent that is too good is bound to be a wrong parent --

because he will encage you. Too much good is destructive. A

good mother will destroy you, because the mother herself is not

centred. Her good is enforced; she is trying to do good. The good is

not natural and spontaneous. It is not like a shadow; it is effort, it is

violent. Your so-called Mahatmas keep crippling people, destroying

people, destroying their freedom in many ways. They go on trying to

dominate by subtle methods, in subtle ways. But the whole desire is

to dominate, and it is very easy to dominate somebody when you are

good. He cannot even rebel against you. Against a bad mother you

can escape; but what do we do against a good mother? She's so good

that you start feeling bad. Watch it: everybody has passed through

that state, and it has to be understood. Otherwise you will never be

able to accept yourself.

Whenever there is a child, there is bound to be some conflict

between the child and the parents, particularly between the child

and the mother in the beginning, and then later on with the father. It

is natural -- because the mother has her own way, her own ideas, her

own philosophy of how life should be lived. And the child is almost

wild; he knows no society, no culture, no religion. He's coming

directly from God; he's as wild as God. He has nothing but freedom,

Beware of

Good Parents!

3736 OSHO WORLD JULY 2008

so there is bound to be some

conflict. And the child has to be

initiated into the walls of the

society. He cannot be left alone --

that too is true. So conflict is

natural. If the mother is very good

then the child has a problem, a very

great anguish and anxiety. The

anxiety is that the child loves his

freedom and knows, intrinsically,

that freedom is good. Freedom is an

intrinsic value. There is no need to

prove that freedom is good --

freedom is good, it is self-evidently

good. Everybody is born with that

desire. That's why we called the

ultimate goal in the east 'total

freedom', Moksha: where the

intrinsic desire is completely

fulfilled and one has no limitations

of any sort. One is absolutely free,

unconditionally free.

Every child is born with that

intrinsic desire to be free, and now

everywhere there is bondage. The

mother says, "Don't do this, don't

do that, sit here, don't go there."

And the child feels pulled and

pushed from everywhere. Now, if

the mother is bad, there is not much

difficulty; the child can think that

the mother is bad and deep in his

heart he can start hating her.

Simple, it is arithmetical -- she is

destroying his freedom and he

hates her. Maybe, for political

reasons, he cannot express it, so he

becomes a diplomat. He knows that

she is the worst woman in the

world, but he goes on paying lip

service.

But if the mother is good then

the problem arises. Then the child is

at a loss to figure it out; the mother

is good... and freedom is good:

"Now, if Mother is good then I must

be wrong, and my freedom must be

wrong. If I am good and my

freedom is good, then Mother must

be wrong." Now, to think that the

mother is wrong is impossible --

because she is really good, and she

keep caring, loving, and doing a

thousand and one things for the

child. The mother is really good, the

child knows that she is good. So

there is only one possibility to

decide, and that is: "I must be

wrong. The mother is good, I must

be wrong."

Once the child thinks, "I must be

wrong," he starts rejecting himself. I

ordinarily never come across a

person who accepts himself totally.

And if you don't accept yourself

totally you will never grow --

because growth is out of

acceptance. If you go on rejecting

yourself, you are creating a split.

You will be schizophrenic. The part

that you reject will hang around

your neck like a great burden, a

great sorrow, a great anxiety, a

tension. You cannot discard it,

because it is part of you; it cannot

be divided. At the most you can

throw it into unconsciousness. You

can become unaware of it, you can

forget about it, you can believe that

it is not there. That's how the

unconscious is created.

The unconscious is not a natural

thing. The unconscious is that part

of your being that you have

rejected, and you don't even want

to face it, you don't want to

encounter it, you don't want to see

that it exists at all. It is there; deep

down in your being it goes on

manipulating you. And it will take

many types of revenge, because it

also needs expression. Now this is

the whole misery of human beings.

A 'good' mother can create the idea

of a 'bad' child. The child himself

begins rejecting himself. This is a

division, a split in personality. The

child is getting neurotic.

Because to feel good with one's

own self should be a natural and

easy thing. That's what your

religious preachers go on doing,

what your priests keep doing: go to

the mosque, go to the temple, go to

the church, and they are there --

thundering, condemnatory, ready

to throw you into hell, ready to

reward you with heaven if you

listen to them, if you follow them.

Of course you cannot follow

because their demands are

impossible, and their demands are

impossible because they don't show

you the way to be good. They

simply say. "Be good."

The way to be good has nothing

to do with being good. The way to

be good has something to do with

centring, with awareness. Being

good has nothing to do with your

character. A really good person has

no character at all; he is

characterless. And when I say

'characterless', I mean he has no

armour, no armature around him.

He has no defence around him, he's

simply open. He's as characterless

as a flower. He's neither good nor

bad. He's simply there -- alert,

conscious, responsible. If something

happens he will respond, but he

will respond directly, he will

respond from here. He will respond

out of the now, he will not respond

out of the past. 'Character' means:

you go on carrying the things that

you have learned in your past.

'Character' means: the conscience

that has been preached to you and

forced upon you. Conscience is a

prison for consciousness.

Buddha brought a revolution

into the world of religion, the

greatest ever. The revolution was

this: that he emphasised

consciousness and not conscience.

He emphasised awareness and not

character. Of course, character

comes automatically, but it comes

like a shadow. You are not to carry

it; it is not a burden then. Have you

Buddha

brought a

revolution into

the world of

religion, the

greatest ever.

The revolution

was this: that

he emphasised

consciousness

and not

conscience. He

emphasised

awareness and

not character

ever watched? -- your shadow goes

on following you, and you are not

burdened, and you need not care

about it. You need not think

about it. Even if you forget

completely it will be there. You

cannot lose it.

-Osho

The Discipline of Transcendence,

Vol-4, Ch 5

If the mother is

very good then

the child has a

problem, a very

great anguish

and anxiety. The

anxiety is that

the child loves

his freedom and

knows,

intrinsically, that

freedom is good.

Freedom is an

intrinsic value

-Osho

www.oshoworld.com

R LF D

ead or isten toull iscourse onwww.oshoworld.com

R LF D

ead or isten toull iscourse on

3736 OSHO WORLD JULY 2008

so there is bound to be some

conflict. And the child has to be

initiated into the walls of the

society. He cannot be left alone --

that too is true. So conflict is

natural. If the mother is very good

then the child has a problem, a very

great anguish and anxiety. The

anxiety is that the child loves his

freedom and knows, intrinsically,

that freedom is good. Freedom is an

intrinsic value. There is no need to

prove that freedom is good --

freedom is good, it is self-evidently

good. Everybody is born with that

desire. That's why we called the

ultimate goal in the east 'total

freedom', Moksha: where the

intrinsic desire is completely

fulfilled and one has no limitations

of any sort. One is absolutely free,

unconditionally free.

Every child is born with that

intrinsic desire to be free, and now

everywhere there is bondage. The

mother says, "Don't do this, don't

do that, sit here, don't go there."

And the child feels pulled and

pushed from everywhere. Now, if

the mother is bad, there is not much

difficulty; the child can think that

the mother is bad and deep in his

heart he can start hating her.

Simple, it is arithmetical -- she is

destroying his freedom and he

hates her. Maybe, for political

reasons, he cannot express it, so he

becomes a diplomat. He knows that

she is the worst woman in the

world, but he goes on paying lip

service.

But if the mother is good then

the problem arises. Then the child is

at a loss to figure it out; the mother

is good... and freedom is good:

"Now, if Mother is good then I must

be wrong, and my freedom must be

wrong. If I am good and my

freedom is good, then Mother must

be wrong." Now, to think that the

mother is wrong is impossible --

because she is really good, and she

keep caring, loving, and doing a

thousand and one things for the

child. The mother is really good, the

child knows that she is good. So

there is only one possibility to

decide, and that is: "I must be

wrong. The mother is good, I must

be wrong."

Once the child thinks, "I must be

wrong," he starts rejecting himself. I

ordinarily never come across a

person who accepts himself totally.

And if you don't accept yourself

totally you will never grow --

because growth is out of

acceptance. If you go on rejecting

yourself, you are creating a split.

You will be schizophrenic. The part

that you reject will hang around

your neck like a great burden, a

great sorrow, a great anxiety, a

tension. You cannot discard it,

because it is part of you; it cannot

be divided. At the most you can

throw it into unconsciousness. You

can become unaware of it, you can

forget about it, you can believe that

it is not there. That's how the

unconscious is created.

The unconscious is not a natural

thing. The unconscious is that part

of your being that you have

rejected, and you don't even want

to face it, you don't want to

encounter it, you don't want to see

that it exists at all. It is there; deep

down in your being it goes on

manipulating you. And it will take

many types of revenge, because it

also needs expression. Now this is

the whole misery of human beings.

A 'good' mother can create the idea

of a 'bad' child. The child himself

begins rejecting himself. This is a

division, a split in personality. The

child is getting neurotic.

Because to feel good with one's

own self should be a natural and

easy thing. That's what your

religious preachers go on doing,

what your priests keep doing: go to

the mosque, go to the temple, go to

the church, and they are there --

thundering, condemnatory, ready

to throw you into hell, ready to

reward you with heaven if you

listen to them, if you follow them.

Of course you cannot follow

because their demands are

impossible, and their demands are

impossible because they don't show

you the way to be good. They

simply say. "Be good."

The way to be good has nothing

to do with being good. The way to

be good has something to do with

centring, with awareness. Being

good has nothing to do with your

character. A really good person has

no character at all; he is

characterless. And when I say

'characterless', I mean he has no

armour, no armature around him.

He has no defence around him, he's

simply open. He's as

characterless as a flower. He's

neither good nor bad. He's simply

there -- alert, conscious,

responsible. If something happens

he will respond, but he will

respond directly, he will respond

from here. He will respond out of

the now, he will not respond out of

the past. 'Character' means: you go

on carrying the things that you

have learned in your past.

'Character' means: the conscience

that has been preached to you and

forced upon you. Conscience is a

prison for consciousness.

Buddha brought a revolution

into the world of religion, the

greatest ever. The revolution was

this: that he emphasised

consciousness and not conscience.

He emphasised awareness and not

character. Of course, character

comes automatically, but it comes

like a shadow. You are not to carry

Buddha

brought a

revolution into

the world of

religion, the

greatest ever.

The revolution

was this: that

he emphasised

consciousness

and not

conscience. He

emphasised

awareness and

not character

ever watched? -- your shadow

goes on following you, and you are

not burdened, and you need not

care about it. You need not think

about it. Even if you forget

completely it will be there. You

cannot lose it.

-Osho

The Discipline of Transcendence,

Vol-4, Ch 5

If the mother is

very good then

the child has a

problem, a very

great anguish

and anxiety. The

anxiety is that

the child loves

his freedom and

knows,

intrinsically, that

freedom is good.

Freedom is an

intrinsic value

-Osho

www.oshoworld.com

R LF D

ead or isten toull iscourse onwww.oshoworld.com

R LF D

ead or isten toull iscourse on