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The Art + Science of the Rethink: 7 Steps to
Expand Your Possibilities +Succeed at Your Pursuit of Happiness
Tara-Nicholle Nelson, M.A., Esq.
Timeline
The Art + Science of the Rethink
“There’s no there there.”Gertrude Stein
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Fast forward to happy.
The Art + Science of the Rethink
• Being rich doesn’t make you happy.• Finding “the one” doesn’t make you happy.• Being “normal” “like everyone else” doesn’t
make you happy:
54% of US adults are "moderately mentally healthy yet not flourishing”
The Art + Science of the Rethink
How can we fast forward to happy?
The Art + Science of the Rethink
How to fast forward to happy:
• Move past perfect.• Stop fighting what is – respect what’s real
right now.• Lean into the fear, anxiety and grief of painful
circumstances.• Rethink failure as fodder.
The Art + Science of the Rethink
What is happiness?
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Philosophers
Aristotle: Happiness = Virtuous Activity
eudemonia“eu” = well; “daimon” = divinity, spirit
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Philosophers
Oprah: Happiness = living your best life now
The Power of Evolution + Intuition
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Self-Experimenters
Benjamin Franklin: 13 VirtuesHenry David Thoreau: Walden Pond
Liz Gilbert: Eat, Pray, Love
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Academics
Sonya Lubomirsky, Ph.D.: Happiness = Formula
50% genetic 10% life circumstances+ 40% intentional activities Your Happiness
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Academics
Mikhail Csikszentmihalyi: Happiness = Flow
“. . .being completely involved in an activity for its own sake.. . . Your whole being is involved,
and you’re using your skills to the utmost.”
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Academics
Martin Seligman, Ph.D.: Happiness = Flow ++++
P – positive emotionE – engagement {flow}R – positive relationshipsM – meaningA – accomplishment
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Tara on Happiness• Seligman left something out• Circumstances – can’t make us happy, but can
make us very unhappy• Happiness = PERMA + “The Rethink”– Flexibility around circumstances– Resilience– Ability to reinvent, transform on desire or on
demand– Mindset management
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
7 Steps
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Belief . Language . Action
• Eckhart Tolle – 3 Options: Leave, Change or Accept situations – anything else is suffering.
• We want to, but can’t or don’t make situational or mindset changes we want.
• Rethink is the mise en place that optimizes our ability to make these changes.
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Why do we need The Rethink?
Step One:
DiagnosticsIdentifying what’s not working.
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Step Two:
Stabilization
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Managing chaos and energy• Certainty anchors• Capture + complete• Decathexis
Step Three:
Getting Unstuck + Urgent
Momentum buildingCultivating traits of the unstuck
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Steps Four + Five:
Belief RemodelingUnlearning
Creating new belief systems
The Art + Science of the Rethink
“If I feel myself to be wronged, a loser or a victim, I will tell myself that some assumption I have made is the source of my difficulty.”
Benjamin Zander
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Step Six:
Future FramingGenerative Language
Speech Acts
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Step Seven:
Prosperity Practices
Practice makes perfect permanent.Skill-building
The Art + Science of the Rethink
My house
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
The Art + Science of the Rethink
Ready to Rethink?
Facebook/Twitter/LinkedIn: @taranicholle
email: Tara@REThinkRealEstate.com
The Art + Science of the Rethink
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