Making the right choice and understanding courtship

PRESENTEDBY

SCOTT ODIGIE

MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE AND UNDERSTANDING

COURTSHIP

“A father can give his sons homes and riches, but only the Lord can give them understanding wives.”

Pro.19:14 (TLB).

REFERENCE

To highlight the wrong things singles do to finding spouses in order to

empower them on making the right choice and redefining courtship.

OBJECTIVE

1. Be a successful Christian: this is considered as the fundamental and most

significant wisdom in the search of a spouse. 3Jn.2, Ps.1:1-3, Jn.10:1-5 & Ps.23.

WISDOM KEY

2. Look for “comparability” and not perfection: a comparable person is someone with strengths and weaknesses, someone of excellence. It is pride that makes people have all kinds of criteria. In fact, God

does not give finished products. Adam said, “it is the woman you gave me.” Gen.3:12.

WISDOM KEY

3. Go for “content” development & not packaging: prioritize content development rather than face value or packaging. Give

yourself to reading, attending seminars, keeping the right associates etc. 2Pet.3:1-3, Pro.31:1-10

WISDOM KEY

4. Sexual sanctity: sex-test transmission would only lead

you into destruction. Heb.13:4.

WISDOM KEY

5. Place priority on God’s ‘will’ (orchestrations/guide) and not your

private standards: you must understand that it is all about God; He would always be

accurate and precise. Gen.24:7, 12-13.

WISDOM KEY

6. God’s endorsement rather than third party affirmation: little wonder why

marriage is not for boys and girls, but for those who are matured enough to be responsible for any decision made.

WISDOM KEY

7. Flexibility with timelines: setting goals is great, but it must be subject to

God’s purpose. There are many plans in the hearts of a man, but the Lord’s purpose that

shall prevail. Ecc.3:11.

WISDOM KEY

8. Choose within the ‘faith community’: considering “good

unbelievers” is an act of foolishness. 1Cor.6:14-16, Gen.24:4.

WISDOM KEY

9. Do it with a respectable guide, mentor, counsellor with a

better experience and could decode the supernatural. Deu.34:9.

WISDOM KEY

10. Avoid fleeces or signs: we don’t walk by sight but faith. Several individuals have

looked out for certain physical signs to prove the validity of someone as their spouse. It is dangerous. Judges 6:17.

WISDOM KEY

11. Restrain yourself from unrecognized prophetic voice or

voices: the voice you listen to determines your destiny. Be careful! 1Kings 13:15-25.

WISDOM KEY

12. Ethnicity, wealth, career sentiments should not override your

judgement: success in marriage does not primarily depend on such factors. Gal.3:28.

WISDOM KEY

13. Practise the love dimension: not infatuation, not barter system etc. 1Cor.13:1-10.

WISDOM KEY

14. Flee multiple dating or substitutes: this is a test of your integrity, soundness of

character and maturity of anyone who is willing to get it right in marriage. Faith

focuses on one thing. Matt.14:30

WISDOM KEY

15. Get your psychology balanced before this adventure: several believers are field with all sorts of negative emotions as a result of past failure experiences and

predominant events in the society.

WISDOM KEY

Courtship is the period in a couple’s relationship which precedes their

engagement and marriage, or establishment of an agreed relationship of a

more enduring kind.

UNDERSTANDING COURTSHIP

Courtship is different from dating in the following:

1. Purpose of the relationship.

COURTSHIP VS DATING

2. Accountability to authorities

COURTSHIP VS DATING

3. Exposure to temptation

COURTSHIP VS DATING

4. Focus on God’s kingdom, pro.18:22,

19:14.

COURTSHIP VS DATING

1. Accountability is key,

MAKING IT WORK

2. Avoid defrauding one another

MAKING IT WORK

3. Share your vision, objectives and values

together,

MAKING IT WORK

4. Understand your unique temperament

personalities

MAKING IT WORK

5. Respect your ideals more than your personalities

MAKING IT WORK

6. Make personal development a life

time goal.

MAKING IT WORK

7. Love God more than yourselves.

MAKING IT WORK

8. Participate in such activities as: play sports together, get involved in ministry

together, read books out loud together, get together with like-minded friends, go out for

dinner, study scriptures together.

MAKING IT WORK

CONCLUSION