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PRESENTEDBY
SCOTT ODIGIE
MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE AND UNDERSTANDING
COURTSHIP
“A father can give his sons homes and riches, but only the Lord can give them understanding wives.”
Pro.19:14 (TLB).
REFERENCE
To highlight the wrong things singles do to finding spouses in order to
empower them on making the right choice and redefining courtship.
OBJECTIVE
1. Be a successful Christian: this is considered as the fundamental and most
significant wisdom in the search of a spouse. 3Jn.2, Ps.1:1-3, Jn.10:1-5 & Ps.23.
WISDOM KEY
2. Look for “comparability” and not perfection: a comparable person is someone with strengths and weaknesses, someone of excellence. It is pride that makes people have all kinds of criteria. In fact, God
does not give finished products. Adam said, “it is the woman you gave me.” Gen.3:12.
WISDOM KEY
3. Go for “content” development & not packaging: prioritize content development rather than face value or packaging. Give
yourself to reading, attending seminars, keeping the right associates etc. 2Pet.3:1-3, Pro.31:1-10
WISDOM KEY
4. Sexual sanctity: sex-test transmission would only lead
you into destruction. Heb.13:4.
WISDOM KEY
5. Place priority on God’s ‘will’ (orchestrations/guide) and not your
private standards: you must understand that it is all about God; He would always be
accurate and precise. Gen.24:7, 12-13.
WISDOM KEY
6. God’s endorsement rather than third party affirmation: little wonder why
marriage is not for boys and girls, but for those who are matured enough to be responsible for any decision made.
WISDOM KEY
7. Flexibility with timelines: setting goals is great, but it must be subject to
God’s purpose. There are many plans in the hearts of a man, but the Lord’s purpose that
shall prevail. Ecc.3:11.
WISDOM KEY
8. Choose within the ‘faith community’: considering “good
unbelievers” is an act of foolishness. 1Cor.6:14-16, Gen.24:4.
WISDOM KEY
9. Do it with a respectable guide, mentor, counsellor with a
better experience and could decode the supernatural. Deu.34:9.
WISDOM KEY
10. Avoid fleeces or signs: we don’t walk by sight but faith. Several individuals have
looked out for certain physical signs to prove the validity of someone as their spouse. It is dangerous. Judges 6:17.
WISDOM KEY
11. Restrain yourself from unrecognized prophetic voice or
voices: the voice you listen to determines your destiny. Be careful! 1Kings 13:15-25.
WISDOM KEY
12. Ethnicity, wealth, career sentiments should not override your
judgement: success in marriage does not primarily depend on such factors. Gal.3:28.
WISDOM KEY
13. Practise the love dimension: not infatuation, not barter system etc. 1Cor.13:1-10.
WISDOM KEY
14. Flee multiple dating or substitutes: this is a test of your integrity, soundness of
character and maturity of anyone who is willing to get it right in marriage. Faith
focuses on one thing. Matt.14:30
WISDOM KEY
15. Get your psychology balanced before this adventure: several believers are field with all sorts of negative emotions as a result of past failure experiences and
predominant events in the society.
WISDOM KEY
Courtship is the period in a couple’s relationship which precedes their
engagement and marriage, or establishment of an agreed relationship of a
more enduring kind.
UNDERSTANDING COURTSHIP
Courtship is different from dating in the following:
1. Purpose of the relationship.
COURTSHIP VS DATING
2. Accountability to authorities
COURTSHIP VS DATING
3. Exposure to temptation
COURTSHIP VS DATING
4. Focus on God’s kingdom, pro.18:22,
19:14.
COURTSHIP VS DATING
1. Accountability is key,
MAKING IT WORK
2. Avoid defrauding one another
MAKING IT WORK
3. Share your vision, objectives and values
together,
MAKING IT WORK
4. Understand your unique temperament
personalities
MAKING IT WORK
5. Respect your ideals more than your personalities
MAKING IT WORK
6. Make personal development a life
time goal.
MAKING IT WORK
7. Love God more than yourselves.
MAKING IT WORK
8. Participate in such activities as: play sports together, get involved in ministry
together, read books out loud together, get together with like-minded friends, go out for
dinner, study scriptures together.
MAKING IT WORK
CONCLUSION