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Turning Hearts to God and Family through Telling and Writing
Sacred Stories
David C. Dollahite, Ph.D.
Professor of Family LifeBrigham Young University
Wilson Folklore Archives Founders LectureHarold B. Lee Library November 10, 2011
The Spirit of Elijah
Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet. And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.”
(Malachi 4:5-6)
The Spirit of Elijah: Turning the Hearts of the Living to the Living
“It is time for us to think of turning the hearts of parents to children now while living, that there might be a bond between parents and children that will last beyond death. It is a very real principle, and we should consider it.”
President Boyd K. Packer
Hasidic Jewish Saying
Give people a fact, and you enlighten their
minds; tell them a story and you touch their souls.
In the entry on “family story and myth” in the Marriage and Family Encyclopedia, it states that family stories: “help bind the members of the family together by creating a community of memory, a chronicle of the way a particular family thinks about itself,”
“enrich the perspectives family members have regarding intergenerational relationships.”
Ponzetti, J. J., & Kellar-Guenther, Y. (). Family Stories and Myths. In The Marriage and Family Encyclopedia. Available online at (http://family.jrank.org /.
The Power of Stories
Stories:are about life as it is livedhave surprises, twists, heroes, actioncapture the essence of lifekeep listeners involved and interestedusually are hopefultouch hearts, minds, and spirits
An Invitation
During this talk you might think of a sacred story that you would like to share and/or record with loved ones.
I Invite you to write down whatever promptings you receive and then act on them.
Why So Much TV and Novels?
Deep hunger for stories in human beings and TV stories (even bad ones) and novels fill that gap
Entertainment-saturated culture created by professionals
Less telling of important stories in families
Passive entertainment (watchers, listeners, & clickers)
Thus, we don’t talk to each other enough in families nor tell each other thing things of our souls.
Turning Hearts ThroughSacred Stories
Sacred stories are stories with deepest meaning
These “stories of the soul” deal with values, gospel truths, and other meaningful things
Include stories of important spiritual changes in your life and of your ancestors
Megan’s story:
Your Reaction to Story?
Different from “ideas” I had been sharing?
Perhaps paid a little more attention?
Perhaps prompted feelings & thoughts?
Story may have been motivating? (Dads)
Kinds of Family StorytellingMost Likely to Turn Hearts
True stories/lived experience
Stories involving family members
Sacred stories of one’s faith tradition
Personal sacred stories (missionary & conversion stories)
CoupleStories
ParentStories
ChildStories
GrandparentStories
SiblingStories
OurFAMILY
“Your Grandpa is a Hero”
One story I tell my children is about their grandpa, my father, when he acted heroically (in my mind) or from a sense of duty (in his mind):
Stories of Our Family’s Spiritual/Religious Experiences
How our family worships togetherWhat our family considers answers to prayerWhat important spiritual experiences our family has hadMiracles our family has experiencedWhat important blessings our family has received
Best Time to Tell Sacred Stories—Anytime, All the Time
Dinner time (earn dessert with story) Bed time (kids most receptive) Family home evening (ancestor game) Reading scriptures (application stories) In the car while traveling (journey
stories) At the “Crossroads” (decision time)
StoriesOf Miracles
Storiesof Healing
Storiesof Service
Storiesof kindness
StoriesOf change
SacredSTORIES
Minor Miracle in the Desert “He paid for your starter . . . “
New Approaches
Embrace new avenues of sharing stories in ways that fit comfortably into present day culture.
Internet helps people satisfy a deep and universal need to tell their stories.
Social Networking as Storytelling
Proliferation of social networking sites, blogs, and digital video testify that we desire to tell our stories, connect with other human beings, and be remembered
Try not to become absorbed/lost in all the minutia and try also to tell and record sacred stories of transcendent meaning
Storieson Paper
Stories on Audio-tape
Stories on Photographs
Stories on Video-tape
StoriesOn computer
storingSTORIES
Some Storage Examples
Video tape: Fairfax stories
Audio tape: Aunt Eunice
Paper (spiritual autobiography)
Photos: Rachel scrapbook of Amherst trip
Computers: Grandpa Iver picture book
Consume Garbage or Create Treasures?
Many use their computers to consume virtual
garbage
You and your family members can use your computer to create familial treasures
Kid History
Videos done by an LDS family (6 so far) that tell family stories from the kid’s perspective and acted out by the adults
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80entLldZOg&feature=related (6 minutes)
Article on Family Storytelling
http://marriageandfamilies.byu.edu/issues/2004/Summer/familybonds.aspx
Some Good Scholarly Books
Story Re-Visions by Alan Parry & Robert E. Doan (1994, Guildford Press)
Ethics and Process in The Narrative Study of Lives edited by Ruthellen Josselson (1996, Sage)
Narrative Solutions in Brief Therapy by Joseph B. Eron & Thomas W. Lund (1996, Guilford)
Telling Stories by Michael Roemer (1995 Rowman & Littlefield)
Some Good Practical Books
Keeping Family Stories Alive by Vera Rosenbluth (1997, Hartley & Marks)
The Gift of Stories by Robert Atkinson (1995, Bergin & Garvey)
Living Legacies by Duane Elgin & Coleen LeDrew (2001, Conari Press)
Your Mythic Journey by Sam Keen & Anne Valley-Fox (1989, Jeremy P. Tarcher/Perigee)
Recommended