Cohesion & Coherence - Bicycles Create Change · it a unified whole. Connectedness is divided...

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Cohesion&CoherenceAKAHACKA&GUPSAWRITINGWORKSHOP

Activity#1

Whataspectofwritingoryourresearchis

mostdifficultatthemoment?

Whatotheraspectsof

writingorPGresearch would

youlikeworkshopson

Whatdo youthink coherence&cohesionis?

How areyoufeelingright

now?

30/08/17 NINA GINSBERG

WhoamI?§TrainedLinguist◦ FunctionalGrammar◦ Australianculture,slang&swearing

§Teacher/UniversityTutor&Lecturer◦ 15yearsteachingInternational&Localstudents(Australiaandoverseas)◦ Academiclanguage,skillsandcommunicationtutorials,workshops&consultations

§BusinessConsultant:WarralMaSolutions◦ AKA/HACKA– Successful&ProductiveAcademicLanguage&communicationSkill◦ BIZBOOST– Proactive&ProfitableBusinessDevelopment&Communication

§ PhDCandidate- SchoolofEducation&ProfessionalStudies(GriffithUni)

§Blog:BicyclesCreateChange.com

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TodaysWorkshop

•Guidelines– not‘rules’

•Concept,Examples&Practice

•Uptoyoutoexperiment&apply

•Focusisonprovidingclear

strategiesforimmediateuse

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Activity#2

Choose1topicbelowtowritetwo (sixsentence)paragraphs

Leaveablanklinebetweeneachsentence

Goodstudyhabitsforstudents

Anoverviewofyourresearchproject

Amajorglobalsocialissue

Yourownacademictopic

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Whyareweheretoday?Learning inhighereducationinvolvesadaptingtonewwaysofknowing:newwaysofunderstanding,interpretingandorganisingknowledge

(Lea&Street1998)

Connectedness referstotheexplicitandimplicitlinksinatextthatmakeitaunifiedwhole.Connectednessisdividedintocohesionandcoherence.Cohesionreferstoexplicitlinksandcoherencereferstoimplicitlinks.

(WatsonTodd,Khongput&Darasawang,2007)

Thegreaterthedistancebetweencohesiveties,themoredifficultitisforthereader.

(Coupland1984)

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Somanycohesivetechniques!Collocations

Synonyms

Repetition

Superordinate

GeneralTerm

Hypernyms

Ellipsis

Paragraphing

Substitution

Enumeration

Numeratives

Conjunctions

Punctuation

Parallelism

Antonyms

AdditivesConnectives

AdversativeConnectives

CasualConnectives

TemporalConnectives

ContinuativeConnectives

General– Specific

Opposition

Formal- Neutral

Connotation-Denotation

LexicalCohesion

Coordinatingconjunctions

PronominalReference

DemonstrativeReference

DefiniteArticleReference

ComparativeReference

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Whatiscohesion&coherence?

COHESION

Explicitlinks

Words&Grammar

‘Bricks’

COHERENCE

Implicitlinks

Structure&Flow

‘Walls’

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ACADEMICPROSE

Clear&logical

Bestwritingever!

‘House’

SkillsfortodayCohesion(5MajorCategories– 19Subsets)1. Ellipsis2. Substitution3. Conjunctions4. References5. LexicalDevices

Coherence– 2CoherenceSkillso Theme&Rhemeo TEEEL

◦ Getworkshopmaterialandresourcesavailableat:www.bicyclescreatechange.com Resourcepage.

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4 Cohesion Skills:Coordinating ConjunctionsCohesive References ReiterationParallelism

COHESION

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1.CoordinatingconjunctionsCOHESION

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1.CoordinatingConjunctionsConnectwords,phrasesorclausestogether

AlsocalledTransitionsorSignpostingwords/phrases

Cangoatthestart,middleoreventheendofsentences.

Forcompoundsentencestheygointhemiddle◦ FANBOYS(*checkpunctuation*)

Canalsobeatstartofnewsentenceorparagraph - toindicateadirection inthereasoningormovementbetweenideas,butalsotorelatethenewmaterialtotheprecedingthoughts.

*Formoreinfo:EnglishHELPYourselfResources

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1.CoordinatingConjunctions

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Source:Smart_Words.org

EditingpracticeEx1:

Modernstudentsmayoftenhaveheardtheterm‘rhetoric’used.Theyprobablydonothaveaclearideaofwhatitmeans.Theiruncertaintyisunderstandable.Thewordhasacquiredmanymeanings.

Howcouldyouimprovethelogicalconnection?

Ex2:Suggestedanswer

Althoughmodernstudentsmayoftenhaveheardtheterm‘rhetoric’used,theyprobablydonothaveaclearideaofwhatitmeans.Theiruncertaintyisunderstandablebecausethewordhasacquiredmanymeanings.

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1.CoordinatingConjunctions

ExampleText

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25mostusedsubordinatingconjunctions- checkgrammar,punctuationandclausesifused

After

Although

As

Assoonas

Because

Before

Bythetime

Evenif

Eventhough

Everytime

If

Incase

Nowthat

Once

Since

Sothat

Than

Thefirsttime

Unless

Until

When

Whenever

Whetherornot

While

Why

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1.CoordinatingConjunctionsStyle

Because….,And…..,But….,

TIPS

•Havealookatyourparagraph– whatcoordinatingconjunctionshaveyouused?

•Lookforpattersinyourwriting– doyouusethesameconjunctions?

•Lookonline,downloadalistofacademictransitionwords• Academictransitions

•Findsomenewonestouse,orusevariationsorchangelocation(front,middle,startofnewparagraph)

•Willimprovevocab,helpdevelopideasandgeneratenewcontent/analysis

•Checkpunctuationandgrammarwhenusingmoreadvancedconjunctiveclause

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ReferencesCOHESION

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TypesofCohesiveReferencesTypes

1.Pronouns- (I,me,she,youwe,my,mine,etc.)

2.Demonstratives- (this,these,here,that,those,there,etc.)

3.Definitearticle- (the)

4.Comparatives– (another,other,similar,better,etc.)*formoreonthisseeBCCResources– CohesionThroughReference

Placement

1.Exophoric

2.Endophoric◦ Anaphoric◦ Cataphoric

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2.References1.Exophoricreferences– areferencetosomethingthatis‘outsidethetext’.Interpretativesourcesinjournalarticlessuchaspriorknowledgecancauseproblemsforreaders

Forhe’s ajollygoodfellowandsosayallofus.(Whois‘he’?=notintext)

2.Anaphoric – previouslymentionedwords‘pointingbackward’

TheCathedralofStPaul’swasbuiltin1840and itisstillstandingtoday.

(TheCathedralofStPaul’s=it)

3.Cataphoric – Subsequentwords- pointingforward

Whentheyarrived,thefeministsfoundthelackofgenderequalityandaccesstoclassresourceswithintheschooltobetotallyunacceptable.(They=feminists).

NINA GINSBERG

Example- CohesiveReference:types&placement

On21December1972, 6theBasicTreaty wassignedbyEastandWestGermany,andrelationsbetween 7thetwocountries startedtoimprove.Duringthenexttwodecades,theybegantocooperatewith 8eachother bysharingculturalandcommercial 9activities suchasartsexchangeprogramsandjointbusinessventures.However,EastGermanswerestilldissatisfied,for 10their livingstandardwaslowerthan 11that ofWestGermany. 12Their industriesproducedinferiorgoods,and 13theircountry waspollutedfrominferiorminingmethodsandcarelessindustrialwaste.4types&3placements– discusswithanotherwhatyouthink/see.

Source:https://www.ntid.rit.edu/sea/processes/referencewords/practice/phoric30/08/17 NINA GINSBERG

TipsforReferences•Becareful(over)using‘it’‘they’‘thing’‘one’– makesurethereferencelinkisclear.

•Afterusingareferenceonce,agoodideaistowriteuseexplicitreiteration(writekeyword,synonymornear-synonym)inthenextsentencetoremindthereaderwhatthemainidea(and‘it’is).

•Lookatjournalarticlesinyourfield– whatismostused?

•Checkyourwriting- whatcohesionreferencetypeyouusethemost?Wherecanyouvarysomecohesivereferences?

•(NB.Cohesionreferenceisinfluencedbythegenreorpurposeofasection)

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3.ReiterationCOHESION

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Reiteration1,DirectRepetition(approx.equality)

snake-snake ascend- ascend

2.Synonyms(near-repetition)similarmeaningwords

snake– serpent ascend- climb

3.Antonyms(oppositewords)

snake– non-ophidian(not-snakelike) ascend- descend

4.Superordinate- (part/widertaxonomy)

snake– reptile ascend– directionofmovement

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Examples:Reiteration

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Source: https://www.slideshare.net/hassanrouijel/lexical-cohesion

TipsforReiterationDoyouuseantonyms forreiteration?Forexample..

Mostsupermodelsarewell-knownforbeingbeautiful.Womenwhoareaestheticallypleasing,prettyandglamourous aremorelikelytogainemploymentasmodels.Girlsoftenundertakebeautifying treatmentstomaximisegoodlooksforemploymentopportunities.Manyfemalesconsider uglinessandbodydysmorphiatobeabhorrentandusemake-uptocover-upimperfections.Thisapproachisalsotakenbyworld-classmodelswhomanyconsidertolooklikethe’ideal’woman.

•Reiterationhelpswithvocabularybuilding

•Usestrategically– avoid‘overrepeating’

•ThisistheMOSTUSEDcohesiontechnique– whatdoesthismeanforyourwriting?

•Lookatyourwritingandotherjournalarticlesinyourfield– whatisthedifference?

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4.ParallelismCOHESION

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CohesionParallelismVideoBreak!

5MINS

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Parallelism- examplesS1.

Technicalwritingencompassesawidevarietyofliterature,includingpublishedarticles,makingoutlines,topromotionalmaterialandeditingmanuals.

S2.

Technicalwritingencompassesawidevarietyofliterature,includingpublishedarticles,outlines,promotionalmaterialandmanuals.

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Source: https://study.com/academy/lesson/examples-of-parallel-structure-in-technical-writing.html

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S1.TheManagertoldhisemployeesthattheymustbeefficient,thattheymustbeproductiveandthattheymustbethorough.

S2.TheManagertoldhisemployeesthattheymustbeefficient,productiveandthorough.

S3.Whenitcametimetosetuptheobstaclecourseforthebirthdayparty,everyonehelpedout:mybrother,mysister,ourneighborsandmyparents.

S4ThebestathleteatschoolalwaysworehismatchingcoloredNikeshoes,hat,socks,shortsandshirttoeverymeet.

S5aBenefitsofmentoringrelationshipsinclude:sharingclinicalknowledge,developingmentee’sskills,helpingothersandsupportingtheprofession.

S5b Leadersneedtosupportemployees.Helpingemployeescanincludeacknowledginggoodworkdone,providingtimelyandpositivefeedback,recognisingwhenpeoplearehavingdifficultiesandinvitingparticipationindecision-makingprocess.

Parallelism- variations

FamousParallelisms

WinstonChurchill

“...weshallfightonthebeaches,weshallfightonthelandinggrounds,weshallfightinthefieldsandinthestreets,weshallfightinthehills.Weshallneversurrender.”

CharlesDickensAtaleoftwocities

Itwasthebestoftimes,itwastheworstoftimes,itwastheageofwisdom,itwastheageoffoolishness,itwastheepochofbelief,itwastheepochofincredulity,itwastheseasonoflight,itwastheseasonofdarkness,itwasthespringofhope,itwasthewinterofdespair...

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ParallelisminAcademic&BusinessPresentations

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Example: Justifying why your new PG research outcome (APP) is relevant

Check script & PPT – Conferences, Confirmation Seminars, meetings, pitchesSource: https://study.com/academy/lesson/examples-of-parallel-structure-in-technical-writing.html

TipsforParallelism•Parallels– describingsimilarordifferentcharacteristics?

•Checkwordforms,tensesandpassive/activevoice(andpunctuation!)

•Lookforwords"and"and"or."Checkoneachsideofthesewordstoseewhethertheitemsjoinedareparallel.Ifnot,edit.

•Ifyouhaveseveralitemsinalist,puttheminacolumntoseeiftheyareparallel.

•Readthelistoutaloud– applythefrowntest.

•Doyouhearthesamekindsofsounds?Forexample,aseriesof"-ing"wordsforeachitem?Isarhythmbeingrepeated?

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Quickcheck

Doyouhaveparallelisminyourparagraph?

Edit(ina)parallelsentence.

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Strategiestoimprovecohesion1. Selectapieceofwriting(yourwork,textbookorjournalarticle).

2. Chooseaparagraphandunderlineorhighlightallthedifferentformsofcohesionused(reference,connectives,reiterationandparallelstructures).

3. Whichformsarethemostcommon?

4. Chooseacouplethatyouthinkareeffectiveandpracticeusingtheminyourownwriting.

5. Trytouseavarietyofwaystoshowtherelationshipbetweenyourideas.

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COHERENCE

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ThemeandrhemeinacademicwritingWHATISIT?

WhatisThemeandRheme?Themeandrhemeisanextremelyvaluableacademicwritingskillasit:

Isapowerfulcohesivetechnique

Avoidsrepetition

Reducesrelianceonconjunctionsandtransitions

Issophisticated

Clarifiesandshowsgoodstructure

Helpswithvocabulary

Itissoeasytoapply(onceyouknowaboutit!)

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Consider..

TheDuke hasgivenmyauntthatbicycle.

MyAunt wasgiventhatbicyclebytheduke.

Thatbicycle thedukehasgivenmyaunt.

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ThemeandrhemeInformationstructure.

MostsentencesinEnglishhavetwoparts:

atheme(ortopic)and

arheme (orcomment)

The theme iswhatyouarewritingabout- itissharedinformationandithasbeenintroducedtoyourreader.

Therheme iswhatyouaresayingaboutthetheme - itisnewinformation orwhatyouwanttotellyourreader.

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Example1Lookatthefollowingsentence:1.TheM1goesfromBrisbanetoSydney.

1.TheM1 goesfromBrisbanetoSydney.theme rheme

Thetheme insentence1is"theM1".ThereaderhasbeenintroducedtotheM1butdoesnotknowwhereitgoesandthereforeneedstobetold(rheme).

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Example2Lookatthefollowingsentences:2.ThemotorwayfromBrisbanetoSydneyiscalledtheM1.

2.ThemotorwayfromBrisbanetoSydney iscalledtheM1.theme rheme

Insentence2a,thetheme is"themotorwayfromBrisbanetoSydney".ThereaderknowsthereisamotorwayfromBrisbanetoSydney,butdoesnotknowwhatitiscalled(rheme).

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ThemeandrhemeInEnglishthetheme usuallycomesatthebeginningofthesentenceandtherhemeattheend.

Thedecisionaboutwhichpartofthesentencetomakethetheme andwhichparttomaketherheme dependsontheinformationthatneedstobecommunicated.

Thiscanalsodependsonthesentencesthatcomebefore.

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ThemeandrhemeLookatthefollowingsentences:

S1.IwasborninBrisbane.BrisbaneisthelargestcityinQueensland.

S2.IwasborninBrisbane.ThelargestcityinQueenslandisBrisbane.

Whatisthedifference?

Whichsentencepairdoyouthinkisbest?Why?

BothsentencesaregrammaticallycorrectbutinS2,theinformationtobecommunicated, therheme - thelargestcityinQueensland,isatthebeginningofthesentence– thisisnotgoodcohesion!

Example1ispreferredinacademicEnglish.

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OrganisingtextsTherearetwobasicchoicesinorganisinginformationtexts:

1.Therheme ofonesentencebecomesthetheme ofthenextsentence.

2.Thetheme ofonesentenceisthesame asthetheme ofthenextsentence.

Let’sseehowthisworks…

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Structure1Thecompleteelectricalbehaviourofanyvalveortransistorcanbedescribedbystatingtheinterrelationofthecurrentsandthevoltagesbetweenalltheelectrodes.Theserelationshipscanconvenientlybedisplayedgraphically,andthevariouscurvesareknownasthe'characteristics'ofthedevice.Inprinciple,allthecharacteristicsshouldbeavailabletothedesignerproposingtousethedeviceinacircuit.

(Jolly,1972).Electronics,p.61)

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Structure2Anthropologyisthestudyofhumankind,especiallyofHomosapiens,thebiologicalspeciestowhichwehumanbeingsbelong.Itisthestudyofhowourspeciesevolvedfrommoreprimitiveorganisms;itisalsothestudyofhowourspeciesdevelopedamodeofcommunicationknownaslanguageandamodeofsociallifeknownasculture.Itisthestudyofhowcultureevolvedanddiversified.Andfinally,itisthestudyofhowculture,people,andnatureinteractwhereverhumanbeingsarefound.

(Harris,1975),Culture,peoplenature,p.1)

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Practice!Choose1activity1. UsetheThemeandRhemePatternExercisefromtheResourcepage

2. Revisityourparagraph

•Whatpatternscanyousee?

•HowwillyouedityourparagraphforbetterTheme&RhemeCohesion?

3.Discusswithapartner

HowelsecouldThemeandRhemehelpyouinyourresearch?

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TEEELStructurePARAGRAPHUNITY

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TEEEELT– Topicsentence(whatisthemainpointofyourparagraph?◦ TRY:Putmainideaatstartofthesentencebeforethefirstverb◦ TRY:makeitasimplesentence

E– Explain

E- Extend/Elaborate

E– Evaluation/Expound Optional&Vary

E– Evidence

E– Examples

L– Link(howdoesthisrelatetotheactualtopic?)◦ TRY:tokeepC&C,relate‘Linksentence’totopicsentenceAND/ORnextparagraphAND/ORthesisstatement/researchtopic.

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TipsforAcademicParagraphs•Academicparagraphguidelines• Between4-8sentences• Somesaysentencesshouldnotbeover20(25?)words• Varysentencelength&types• Followlongcomplexsentenceswithasimplesentencetogetreader

‘backontrack’• Topicsentences=simplesentencewithmainideaatthestartBEFORE

thefirstverb• Followupreference/evidencesentencewithyourown(noreference)

sentence• Avoidreferencingeverysentenceinaparagraph

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ExampleofTEEELVolcanicactivityoccursaroundthePacificRingofFirebecauseofmanydestructiveplateboundariesarelocatedthere.Itisestimatedthatthisregionhasupto200plateboundariesthatcoulderuptwithdevastatingeffectsatanytime(Southy,2015).AnexampleofoneofthesedestructiveboundariescanbefoundbetweenthecontinentalSouthAmericanplateandtheoceanicPacificplacewhichhasformedtheAndesMountains.Thesevastmountainsmeansthattheoceanicplateisdenserandissubductedunderneaththecontinentalplateandmeltsasitfallsintothehotmantlebelow.Thiscausesmagmatothenrisesupthroughthecontinentalplateandbeeruptedthroughvolcanoesatthesurface.SimilardestructiveboundariesallaroundthePacificRingofFirearethereasonsforsuchhighvolcanicactivityinthearea.

CanyoumapeachTEEELsentencefunction?

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Strategies1.Readyourworkoutaloud

2.StructureMapMatch(Yourmapcomparedtoafriend’smap)

3.Useoutlinetoplanyourwriting– focus,savetime,avoidblocks

4.UseEnglishHELPHelpYourselfResourcesorYouTubevideos

5.3isthemagic(academic)number

6.Knowacademicparagraphsandacademicstyleconventions

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Howdoyourate?Cohesion1. CoordinatingConjunctions2. References3. Reiteration4. Parallelism

Coherenceo Theme&Rhemeo TEEEL

o Othertip/syoupickedup?

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TEEELThemeRheme

Refs OtherCoord.

Conjun.

Reiter. Paral.

Finalthoughts•AtUni,youaremarkedonOUTPUT(writingandpresentationsusually)

•Worksmarter,notharder!Bestrategic– usevarietyandbejudicious

•Avoidoveruseandformulaicstructures– experiment&adapt

Fastwriting– getideasdown(product)

Slowediting– linkwords&sentences(cohesion)

StrategicReviewing– academicstyle&logic(coherence)

•NeedtoknowWHAT (content)youarewriting ANDWHY (function)ANDHOW (skills)youwrite.

•Havefun!

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ThankyouGoodluckediting!

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n.ginsberg@griffith.edu.au

EnglishHELP Consultations Tues 12-2 pmEmail for private consultations $35 ph.

AdditionalContent

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Consolidate&Review

•Whatcohesionandcoherencefeaturescanyouidentifyinthistext?

•Whatfeaturesarepresent?

•Whatfeaturesaremissing?

• CanyoumaptheTheme&Rhemepattern?

• CanyoumapwhateachTEEEELsentenceis?

Evaluation

•Doyoufindthistext‘easytoread’?

•Whatwouldmakeitmorecohesive?Coherent?

•Whatwouldyouchangetoimprovethistext?

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NB:ToImproveCohesion

ForCohesioninSentenceBeginnings ...PuttheOLD(THEME)FIRST◦ Beginsentenceswithinformationfamiliartothereader◦ Don’tbeginasentencewithnewinformation◦ Don’tbeginasentencewithtechnicalinformation◦ Useopeningstoreferbacktopreviousmaterialorgentlyintroduceanewtopic

ForCohesioninSentenceEndings ...PuttheNEW(RHEME)LAST◦ Endsentenceswithnewinformationreaderscannotanticipate◦ Don’tendasentencewithknowninformation◦ Putthenew,technical,anddifficultinformationattheendofthesentence◦ Usetransitionstoconveytheconnectionsbetweentheideasinyoursentences

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NB:ToImproveCoherence

Coherenceiseasilyestablishedintwoways:1.Topicsofindividualsentencesareclear2.Topicsofparagraphs areclearAparagraphismorethanagroupofsentences.Ifyoucan’tquicklyandsuccinctlysaywhataparagraph’smainpointis,itlackscoherence.Examplepassage:Asareminder,pleasepromptlyreturnthelecturenotesyouborrowed.SlidethenotesundermydoorifIamnotthere.Imaybecomeagitatedifyouarelate,muchlikemyUncleChesterafterseveraleggnogsonChristmasEve.MostChristmasesIlikedtostayupandopenmystockingsaftermidnight.StayinguplatewasexcitingandwouldberepeatedaweeklateratNewYear’s.SowouldUncleChester’sdisgracefulbehavior.Whatisthemainidea???

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Thedifferencebetweenmeaning andform

Tocommunicateaspecificidea,thereareanumberofvocabularyandstructuralchoices– butthesearenotnecessarilythesameas‘meaning’

S1Theproposalappearsattractiveandfeasible;thecostistoohigh,though.

S2Althoughthecostishigh,theproposalisattractiveandfeasible.

S3Althoughthecostishigh,theproposalisconsideredattractiveandfeasible.Fornon-nativespeakers,thefollowingthreesentencemeaningandfrommight‘seem’synonymous

(NBThestructuraldifferencesbetweenS1andS2representdifferentattitudesofawriter.S2 canbeinterpretedasfavorableattitudetowardstheproposal.S1 isamorereservedattitude.Lexicalchoicebetween‘is’S2 showscommitmentand‘isconsidered’S3 indicatesthewritersdetachment(othersconsiderittobe,butnotthewriter).

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Quick,InformalParallelExamples

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Source: http://plato.algonquincollege.com/applications/guideToGrammar/?page_id=4213

ReferencesCoupland,J.(1984).Writingtexts:cohesioninscientificandtechnicalwriting. CommonGround:SharedInterestinESPandCommunicationStudies.EditedbyWilliamsetal.,ELTDocument, 117,55-61.Lea,M.R.,&Street,B.V.(1998).Studentwritinginhighereducation:Anacademicliteraciesapproach. StudiesinHigherEducation, 23(2),157-172.doi:10.1080/03075079812331380364Kuo,C.(1995).Cohesionandcoherenceinacademicwriting:Fromlexicalchoicetoorganization. RELCJournal, 26(1),47-62.doi:10.1177/003368829502600103WatsonTodd,R.,Khongput,S.,&Darasawang,P.(2007).Coherence,cohesionandcommentsonstudents’academicessays. AssessingWriting, 12(1),10-25.doi:10.1016/j.asw.2007.02.002Tanskanen,S.,&ProQuestEbooks.(2006). Collaboratingtowardscoherence:Lexicalcohesioninenglishdiscourse.Amsterdam;Philadelphia;:JohnBenjaminsPub.Co.

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ContentSources &Resourceshttp://www.uefap.com/writing/parag/par_flow.htm

https://twp.duke.edu/sites/twp.duke.edu/files/file-attachments/cohesion-coherence.original.pdf

Pintrest:linkingwordforessays

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