Vol 26 - No.11Aug-Sep-Oct 15

And aren't they infinite?? I haven't even edited my first issue and I have been

blessed with mail, gifts (an excellent book, Towards Righteous Living by

C.S. Vincent), articles and donations to print this issue. I thank you all from

the bottom of my heart, for your kindness and generosity. Thank you Wendy,

Kiran, Radhika, June and Kshama for all your help in bringing out this issue.

The last few months have been challenging on many fronts. And I have

learned yet again that Gratitude is the most powerful prayer to God that we

can ever pray. Through all these challenges, I have managed to breathe

solely by virtue of giving thanks for the Grace of God.

But these months were also filled with blessings of laughter and family

reunions, moments to cherish. There were new babies, old pets, family

weddings, cousins, old friends, good Samaritans. And there was rain, rain,

rain - every precious, scarce drop.

Globally, we have the greatest human refugee crisis since World War II. In

India we seem to be spiralling into madness with communal violence,

crime, looming drought, human and animal abuse and more bans. Every day

I wake up and wish the world a little more human tolerance, kindness, and

compassion towards each other and to the Earth.

I urge you to look around you and count your blessings. And give thanks to

the Lord, for He is SO good! As the year ends, I wish you compassion. I wish

you generosity of spirit, joy in your heart. I wish you every abundant

blessing from the Lord, which you will realise once you open your heart and

give, give, give.

Grace will be yours when you can truly be grateful.

Raadhika Dosa D'Cruz

COUNTING MY BLESSINGS

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MAILBOX

Dear Radhika,

Welcome to The Mustard Seed as its

new editor taking over from Kiran

Bhat. I hope it will be a happy

journey for you and for us readers.

I am an avid reader of TMS for

many years since Sadiqua Peerbhoy

was the editor.

I appreciate its secular nature and a

wide variety of philosophical

thoughts and ideas from various

religions for general interest.

Best wishes,

Kusum Gokarn, Pune

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Raadhika,

What a special treat it was to open up the May issue of TMS and to find Kiran’s “Farewell Edit”. And then your “Unexpected Surprise” So once again the precious TMS has changed hands. A hearty thanks to each of the past editors for their efforts to keep this Opus Dei going and a hearty welcome and sincere thanks to Raadhika for her courage and willingness to take up this task. May GOD bless each one of you with health, peace and happiness now and forever. Blessings,Sandra Mahesh from Bangalore PS: I have been enjoying the TMS for ten years and passing this on so others can also enjoy this splendid piece of art.

Dear Madam,

You are indeed doing a great service

in creating spiritual awareness. It is

said that God created us without us,

but cannot save us without us. Just

our awareness of His presence

makes our lives meaningful and

gives us inner serenity and peace.

This is what your TMS creates

quietly in it’s own way. May God

bless you abundantly and help you

s h o u l d e r t h e n e w, h e a v y

responsibility. Be assured of our

daily support of prayers for you.

A. Josephraj, Bangalore

Dearest Radhika, What a beautiful and blessed journey you are embarking upon. It is a lovely publication and the timing of you sending it to me is a God thing. He has been after me to write, I have stopped because I told Him there was no one to read it. Lol! I told Him nobody wants to hear my story. He is so great! Love you girl! Thanks for sharing and please add me to the list,Idania Duncan, America

Your spiritual journey is whatever light and grace you bring to whatever you do-Liz Gilbert

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When Raadhika asked me to write something for TMS I had mixed feelings. Was it not too soon? I was the Editor just last issue. The readers might want to read some fresh perspectives. As this thought came into my mind, it was replaced by ...why not? I am a humble contributor to TMS first.The Ego that I write so well, I paint so well, I am such a good manager , I am such a good servant of God is all an Identity. In reality we are just Spirit or Energy. We are not our Identity. It is the Identity which is egoistical, not the Spirit. When we think we are too good or too bad, or whatever qualifier we give ourselves, it is the Identity we have assumed.So as this thought came to me, I was also pondering that if I am pure Spirit then why do I keep forgetting it? Why can't I slip in and out of my assumed identity as and when I want? At a grosser level we do that don't we, without realising it? As a woman, I am a mother, wife, entrepreneur, employer, service provider, daughter, sister, sister- in - law. I am also different most of the times in my different roles. I would not treat my daughter like I would my client. The context is different, is it not? So it is with Life and all our relationships. If we have had a scrap with somebody, assuming you are the Spirit or Consciousness, it is easy to forgive. It will only take seconds. But if you are assuming an Identity, it is difficult to forgive and forget as you remember all the wrongs that have happened to you in that Identity. Try it for yourself and see the difference. We can gain many more years to our life and who knows, our health too!I would like to recognise myself as Spirit more and more because that is what I am. Then I am open and non- judgemental and every interaction is a joy.Kiran Bhat

I AM PURE CONSCIOUSNESS....

JAGANNATH RATH YATRA 2015

I remember coming across the word juggernaut when I was a little boy. I wondered what it meant. The dictionary was of some help, but to experience the true meaning of that word I travelled to Puri this year for the millennium's first Nabakalebara. As the day drew closer I could sense pangs of being overwhelmingly aware of how each minute felt so long....I longed to be there. I went with a curious mind, open to the whole experience.Nabakalebara is the symbolic recreation of thewooden forms of the four deities at Jagannath temple, Puri ( Odisha). In the Jagannath cult, this is a periodic renewal of the wooden forms of Jagannath, Balabhadra, Subhadra and Sudarshana. The occasion occurs every 12th or 19th year of the previous Nabakalebara. The last such festival of events was held in 1996. Just as all living beings cannot escape the cycle of birth and death, here in

Puri the Gods too cannot escape this. Every 12th or 19th year the souls of the deities are transferred into their new bodies. Just as we have heard that the soul is indestructible, this ritual reiterates this philopsohy, transferring the soul from one body to another.To witness this phenomenal event, devotees from far and wide, across the length and breadth of India converge in Puri. I watched with bated breath as the new idols emerged from the temple. Each of them was safely ensconced in a Rath (Huge Chariots). The air grew electric with chants of “Jagannat! Jagannath!” The raths are pulled along the streets to the Gundicha temple a few miles away by the ardent ecstatic devotees. Lord Jagannath is a form of Krishna and he resides in Puri with his wife Lakshmi....He longs to meet his love Gundicha, who is Radha, and he is accompanied by his brother Balabhadra and sister Subhadra. The heart is rooted while the mind wanders away in search of the elusive illusion called Maya. Devotees from all castes and social bearings converge together, pulling the juggernaut –like raths, to help the Lord meet his loved one. The Universe conspires to make it happen. The Gundicha temple is decorated to receive our Lord and His family. While He is away, His wife longs and pines for Him, and puts out the kitchen fire: physical hunger and thirst have no place in Her longing. After ten days, the Brother and Sister return with the Lord back to His home and His Wife. The grand culmination of this journey is the Sunavesh, where the deities are adorned with gold jewellery and accessories....which is a marvellous sight to behold.I returned home after participating in this great event, my feeling humbled, overwhelmed with sublime love ....The chants and cymbals reverberating in my thoughts ....it is faith, love and devotion that triumph... to be able to gaze into the eyes of the infinite Jagannath.

Kumar Iyer from Mumbai attended the nabakalebara in Puri this July.

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LETTER FROM EUROPE

Human madness is destroying Mother Earth with devastating greed and we have all accepted that there is nothing we can do about it. So our first reaction to the incredible scenes we all witnessed on television a few days ago was that the world was going insane.For months we have been exposed to the insane destruction of ordinary people like you and me by forces that seemed invincible: young men and women determined to hurt and rape and kill other people against whom they had no personal grievance; we called them terrorists and wondered why “perfectly normal” from “good Christian” homes in Europe should suddenly want to leave their loving parents and travel to Syria to learn how to use a Kalashnikov rifle, to join a band of brothers and sisters dedicated to sacrificing their young lives in a jihad committed to destruction. And they succeeded. Ancient monuments of human endeavour and ingenuity were dynamited in seconds. Undefended towns and villages were ravaged and burnt. Old people and young mothers with their infants, who were unable to run away, were brutally tortured and raped and terrorised into submission. As we helplessly watch these scenes of meaningless violence on our TV screens, there is a growing conviction that humanity was going mad and the forces of law and order and human decency are no match for this terrorism that has sprung out of nowhere.Yesterday a new force appeared. Hundreds and thousands of “ordinary people like you and me” collected food and bottles of clean water and warm clothing and toys for children and flooded railway stations in Germany and Austria, holding up placards to welcome bewildered families of Syrian refugees who had survived the hazards of their long trek to freedom.A lot of questions arise in my mind to which I find no easy answers. How long before the hospitality towards refugees wears thin ? Am I just a puppet on a string pulled this way or that by the media who decided to publish a photograph of little Aylan, washed ashore, face down on a beach in Turkey? Will sanity prevail over madness in my lifetime? And, above all, can I, one little individual, really change the tide of history?P.S. If pressed to give answers to these questions, I am tempted to quote “.....the answers are blowing in the wind !”, but that would be running away from my responsibility. So I turn, on this Birthday of Our Lady, celebrated in Mumbai as “Bandra Feast”, to some moral giants for inspiration. The first has to be Angela Merkel, whose moral power turned the tide and showed up the fickleness of lesser political leaders. A cynical press might call it a coldly calculated political move on her part; I prefer to see it as a bold assertion of an unpopular conviction that the goods of the earth belong to all mankind, irrespective of race, colour or creed.Pope Francis is another, much criticised moral giant who has faced more opposition from “good catholics” within the Church than from “publicans

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and sinners” outside. He, too, has pleaded for a world that values humanity above the mad rush for wealth, and, like his saintly namesake of Assisi, he loves Mother Earth and all her creatures and begs us to save this planet which is our only home.I end with Our Lady and quote from a hymn that is loved by many of my friends:Clear star of the morning, in beauty enshrinedO Lady make speed to the help of mankind

Patrick de Souza has retired from the UNHRC and lives in Geneva

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LORD I'M GETTING OLDER

Lord, you knew better than I know myself that I am getting older and will someday be really old. Keep me from the fatal habit of thinking I must say something on every subject and on every occasion. Release me from the craving to straighten out every body's affairs. Make me thoughtful and not moody, helpful but not bossy. With my vast store of wisdom, it seems a pity not to use it at all, but you know, Lord, that I want a few friends at the end. Keep my mind from the endless recital of details give me the wings to come to the point.

Seal my lips on my aches and pains. They are increasing and my love for rehearsing then is becoming sweeter. I do not ask for the grace to enjoy the tales of others pains, but help me to endure them with patience. I dare not ask for improved memory but for a growing humility and a lessening cocksureness, when my memory seems to clash with the memories of others. Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be mistaken. Keep me reasonable sweet. I so not want to be a saint – some of them are so hard to live with – but a sour old woman is one of the crowning works of the devil. Give me the ability to see good things in unexpected places and the talents in people, and give me he grace to tell them so.

By a 17th century Nun

“ I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don't worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or family or life.

Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes next year, and forever”-Neil Gaiman

MISTAKES

It is our basic inherent human feeling; a natural instinct hardwired in our neurology, the inability to bear the sight of another's suffering, to empathize with others. To me suffering means to watch suffering around me. Growing up I often felt helpless and hopeless. I wanted to make a difference, to reduce suffering, change someone's reality and create value through my life.A few years ago, in a chance meeting I discovered Buddhism. Buddhism says a human revolution in just a single individual will help achieve change in the destiny of a nation and further will enable a change in the destiny of all human kind.Buddhism helped me evolve into a more selfless and compassionate being. It taught me that everything is interdependent in nature. It is important to recognise the oneness of self and environment and also all the sentient beings in our environment.That's when I chose my path to live a life of service to others, to be a Bodhisattva! I started volunteering at many NGOs for human and animal welfare. I found various mediums to be of service. Through my volunteer work I began to believe in my ability to be a catalyst for social change.I started working independently, raising funds and awareness for my causes. I made various alliances and tie-ups, started asking and reaching out to people for help. I believe when you ask, you shall receive! With the support I received from my friends and social contacts I was able to advance in my social work. Nothing comes easy. Everyday brought with it a different kind of struggle but my determination kept me going.A few years later I have registered and founded my own NGO. It's been an amazing journey of ups and downs, highs and lows but every morning I wake up with fresh conviction and commitment to be a Bodhisattva of the earth.What can I do?? Let me show you what I can do!!!I wish to inculcate a community service and community support attitude in my city, my state and my country. I want Bodhisattva's to emerge from the earth and rise to their purpose and mission. Our real strength lies in our capacity for empathy with others and the action we take on their behalf.Together we can make a social impact and create A New Earth.Mojdeh FarashahiFounder, Bodhisattva NGO, Pune

BODHISATVA

Important encounters

are planned

by the souls

long before

the bodies

see each other

- Paulo Coelho

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Experiments with Full GoneTime and scriptures tell us to empty our minds, empty our souls, empty our hearts to seek perfection. To find or seek a higher union with the divine. Divinity is a desire for our own perfections, moving away from our own imperfections. The seeker however, constantly struggles with his inner nature to seek this state. To be better than what he was yesterday. Various spiritual paths speak of reaching this state of perfection with beautiful metaphors, one of the most beautiful one is the state of Trinity: Of the constant tie between the three stages of evolution - Creation, Preservation and Transformation. When we embark on the journey of desire for perfection, we come across the cyclic phases of this trinity. The human body, mind, soul (coincidently a trinity all over again!) goes through several stages of growth. The first 7 years, the formative years are our connection to the world outside within the foundations laid by the origin of birth. A child will express himself in the future, as he has been conditioned in the first 7 years of his place on earth. The formative years comprise of developments of relationships of an individual with his immediate environment (trust, love, acceptance, joy, food, shelter) and sub- immediate environment (expression, power, creation, compassion). As an individual moves forward in the socio-geographical lines, he develops a side which is lower than his base self, as an act of self transformation. What he develops is an individuality of his circumstances which on constant affirmation becomes his self imposed, sometimes self -inflicted identity, a reason for his action and reaction. An individual can be happy or not depending on his levels of awareness of his immediate and sub immediate environment. So when a person defines happiness, a person also needs to define the cause for that happiness. And it works the same for unhappiness. It is very essential to a person seeking happiness to define what is causing that unhappiness. A self -aware person will ask 'How do I put together the picture puzzle to make sense?'

Most often people start connecting to family, friends, social groups, gurus, guides who help them redefine how to look at happiness, once a certain discontent with a situation or life has set in. We all have a role model that to us is perfection. No one has had a perfect life, and life and living by its very nature demands certain humility from any object, living or inanimate, that you surrender to a power that is beyond your comprehension. You may call it god, you may call it spirit, you may call it something that for you is far greater than your own limited powers of comprehension, action and

SERIES

SPIRITUAL ALCHEMY

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reaction. You may even call it consciousness. There are things which cannot be defined, and I personally think that is Beautiful.

Transformation is a process of evolution. But evolution by its very nature cannot be a self defined conscious effort as it is a primal need, unless aided by a Guru/Guide or a person more evolved than who we are at a certain point of time in our evolution. The Guru is someone who has the higher ability to see much further ahead than the person seeking it. Our ego state comes alive as our personal demon to pull us away from our Guided state. Sometimes even tour guided journeys can be tumultuous to say the least. That is why it is very important to find a guide who has the good sense to not judge you, but very subtly turn you in the direction which would be for your greater good. The pact of trust between the Guide and Seeker takes years, and this is a pact that cannot be breached. No two guides are the same, no two seekers are the same, just like no two paths are the same. The Guide takes on the ultimate responsibility of watching out for the seeker.

The point is when we reach that state of emptiness. How do we then define, or rather redefine what our mind, body and soul will carry forward, as thoughts, deeds or acts. The transformative self is constantly involved with the creative self to want to give birth to a 'self', an identity. It is very difficult for the human mind to exist in a state of no mind, or emptiness, because humans are the only species who have evolved to think. And a thinking mind can never be still and silent, as by its very evolutionary trait, it will constantly try to be clever and cunning, distorting the paradigms of a natural life, for its comfort or convenience.

Now one needs to wonder what is it that gives us bliss, if it is not a 'no mind state'...

Note: The views expressed in this article are personal beliefs and experiences of the author and are not the final authority on any spirituality or belief system. The write ups just express an analysis of several understandings.

Samia Khan

filmmaker. artist. poet

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Art by SAMIA

A few years ago I read a book called 'Kisses from Katie' by Katie Davis, a 18 year old girl who left her easy American life, moved to Uganda, adopted a bunch of orphans and started an NGO to reach out to thousands more. Reading her book was like hearing me and my missionary friends talk- in our motivation, our questions, our struggles and our experience of God's goodness. Only she has accomplished so much more. You should read her book! As I read this particular story in her book, something in me said 'Yes! This is what it is about.'

'That night in 2007 was cold and rainy. I was walking out of the supermarket on Main Street in downtown Jinja, on my way home. Then I saw him. Huddled on the street corner, drenched and shivering, was a little boy. At that moment, all I really wanted to think about was getting home, getting dry, and crawling into my warm bed. But a voice inside told me to stop.I took the boy inside the supermarket to dry him off a bit and bought him some biscuits and juice. I gave him my sweatshirt, a small wooden cross I carried in my pocket, and some change so he could get a ride home.As he left, he called out," What is your name?"

"Katie," I responded, "Auntie Katie.”

"Me, I am Daniel," he shouted and disappeared in to the wet, chilly night. About a year later, I walked into the big supermarket to buy food for my family and got caught in a big hug. Two small brown arms wrapped around me as a child's voice excitedly proclaimed, "Auntie Katie!"I looked down to see Daniel. Beaming.

"Wait," he urged me.

He hurried to the nearest street vendor and bought me a popsicle with the little pocket change he had. He then dug his little hand in his pocket and pulled out the small wooden cross. Looking at me with a wide grin, he spoke words that pierced my heart: "I have never stopped praying for you every day.”

To this day I think of that story and stand amazed at the goodness of our God and the enormous things He can accomplish if I am obedient to His command to stop and love the person in front of me.This is not about random acts of kindness, or helping me to feel good about myself. It is about stopping and loving the person in front of me. Yes, this is a message I need to hear every day, because it's so easy to forget.Do the next thing God gives you. Love the person he puts in front of you, whether it is your annoying younger brother or a ragged beggar on the street. That's all it takes. That's all He's asking. Just say yes to the next thing.

Suzanna De Almeida is a young missionary

STOP AND LOVE THE PERSON IN FRONT OF YOU

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The Mind is so unpredictable. Sometimes it behaves like a rebellious child, sometimes the epitome of wisdom. My mind refuses to connect to what is going on. Due to other compulsions, I have to sit through the program, with my mind like a toddler brought to a boring gathering, persistently asking me to get up and leave.

I am sitting in a plush air-conditioned hall surrounded by a hundred philosophers and religious Gurus, and I feel like an imposter. Most of the people present here appear to be listening with rapt attention to learned speaker after speaker. I am impressed by their strength of mind, their conviction, their unshakable belief in what they think is the truth.

Leaders of different factions are “selling” their exclusive beliefs. As a person who avidly studies human behavior, I observe on their faces the walls they have built in front of them. No one is willing to be a buyer. Each is looking for loopholes in the philosophy of the other, to reinforce his own beliefs.

The strength of their minds is a mystery to me. They keep saying publicly that every religion leads to the same goal, yet they adamantly adhere to their own. There is no room for adjustment, no scope for including other teachings. I am yet to meet a person who says “I am half a Hindu, one fourth Christian, one eighth Muslim, and one eighth agnostic.” And if there are a few people who do say such things, they are ridiculed and rejected by others.

When I finally come out for a break, I see a young boy serving snacks to the participants. He is of school-going age, but has obviously been forced to work. Then I watch him closely and I see that every time a learned delegate deposits a plate with left-overs, he is collecting the food crumbs. Periodically he darts behind the canteen shed, and there they are – half a dozen street dogs waiting patiently for him to bring their meal to them. I am sure this kid has neither been taught the 3 R's nor philosophy of any religion – but he knows that serving living beings is the true form of serving the creator.

Dr. Ali Khwaja,

Counsellor, columnist and life skills coach

FROM THE HEART…

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‘deh devache mandir' is one of the many abhangs (poems) that you will hear in the annual Vaari (pilgrimage) of the Varkaris (a small sect of the farming community in Maharashtra, India). In a similar Abhang, 'kaya hi Pandhari' - by Sant Eknath, Eknath says "Pandharpur can actually be found right where one is, in one's own body. The body thus becomes a tirtha.”

The word Varkari itself means, 'a pilgrim'. Theirs is a religious movement within the bhakti spiritual tradition of Hinduism. Amongst their practices, the Varkaris prostrate in front of each other because "everybody is Brahma" i.e. everyone is a creator, and call each other 'Mauli' (never mind the gender), which means 'mother', while stressing upon the values of sacrifice, forgiveness, simplicity, compassion, love and humility in their poems. The pilgrimage is a journey intended towards a consciousness that is liberated and content.

Spirituality for many denotes almost

any kind of blissful experience.

For others, it denotes a process of

transformation. In modern times

the emphasis is on subjective experience....

Revati Malati is an aesthete,

philosopher, story teller.

देह देवाचे मंदीर, आत आत्मा परमेश्वर ॥१॥

जशी उसात हो साखर, तसा देहात हो ईश्वर ।

जसे दुग्धामध्ये लोणी, तसा देही चक्रपाणी ॥२॥

देव देहात देहात, का हो जाता देवळात ।

तुका सांगे मूढ जना, देही देव का पहाना ॥३॥

- abhang (a devotional poem), by Sant Tukaram

Tukaram says,

Why do you go to the temples?

The body is a temple

TUKARAM SAYS…

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Once a man got lost in the desert. The water in his flask had run out two days ago, and he was on his last legs. He knew that if he didn't get some water soon, he would surely perish. The man saw a shack ahead of him. He thought it was a mirage, but having no other option, he moved towards it. As he got closer he realized it was quite real. So he dragged his weary body to the door with the last of his strength.The shack was not occupied and seemed like it had been abandoned for quite some time. The man gained entrance, hoping against hope that he might find water inside.His heart skipped a beat when he saw what was in the shack: a water pump. It had a pipe going down through the floor, perhaps tapping a source of water deep under-ground.He began working the pump, but no water came out. He kept at it and still nothing happened. Finally he gave up from exhaustion and frustration. He threw up his hands in despair. It looked as if he was going to die after all.Then the man noticed a bottle in one corner of the shack. It was filled with water and corked up to prevent evaporation.He uncorked the bottle and was about to gulp down the sweet life-giving water when he noticed a piece of paper attached to it. Handwriting on the paper read: "Use this water to start the pump. Don't forget to fill the bottle when you're done."He had a dilemma. He could follow the instructions and pour the water into the pump, or he could ignore it and just drink the water.What to do? If he let the water go into the pump, what assurance did he have that it would work? What if the pump malfunctioned? What if the pipe had a leak? What if the underground reservoir had long dried up?But what if the instructions were correct? Should he risk it? If it turned out to be false, he would be throwing away the last water he would ever see.Hands trembling, he poured the water into the pump. Then he closed his eyes, said a prayer, and started working the pump.He heard a gurgling sound, and then water came gushing out, more than he could possibly use. He luxuriated in the cool and refreshing stream. He was going to live!

After drinking his fill and feeling much better, he looked around the shack. He found a pencil and a map of the region. The map showed that he was still far away from civilization, but at least now he knew where he was and which direction to go.He filled his flask for the journey ahead. He also filled the bottle and put the cork back in. Before leaving the shack, he added his own writing below the instruction: "Believe me, it works!”Radhika Akolkar

MAILBOX

A LEAP OF FAITH

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DESPONDENCY

How is 'sadness' a thought that blocks the work of the Holy Spirit in us? Isn't it just a normal emotion? Isn't it healthy to be sad when sad things happen? What could the desert fathers mean by characterizing it as a moral problem?We have to distinguish the simple emotion of sadness from the thought of sadness. Still more do we have to strongly state that the disease of clinical depression is something quite other than those. The desert fathers knew all about depression, although of course they didn't have the name for it. They speak of a causeless sorrow that engulfs the human person, against his or her will, and which they are powerless to overcome. They are quite clear in their writings that this is not the thought of despondency.Nor is the simple emotion that thought, either. Emotions come and go and we have little immediate control over them—they are not in themselves morally significant. The thought of despondency is something quite different. It is, essentially, the fixed conviction that I cannot be happy unless I have things my own way. When I don't get what I want (which, not being God, happens to me fairly often), I will be sad. And I will be miserable, and make everyone else miserable, until I get it. Such is the driving force of the despondent soul.What I want will only coincidentally be what you want, and quite often be quite different. Only one of us can be happy at any given moment, if the above notion of happiness prevails. Despondency thus links arms with anger and life becomes a pitched battle for dominance, and nobody ends up especially happy.There are people whose lives are ruined by the thought of despondency—people who end up so bitter over the hand they were dealt, constantly complaining, never satisfied, always finding something wrong in any day, any situation, and focusing on that with laser precision. And we all know other people who, in spite of fairly serious afflictions and tragedies in their lives, come through to a place of joy and peace, hard-won perhaps, but all the more real for that.Most of us fall somewhere in between, with little flashes of despondency, large or small veins of self-centredness and childish self-will lacing through our person. But the truth all of us need to return to is that happiness has nothing—nothing at all!—with getting one's own way. Happiness lies in coming to love God's way, in growing to see that our life, our real life, is to live in a communion of love with God in which 'what we want' is more and more purified and simplified to wanting what God wants.And the great surprise twist ending of not just our life, but the life of the whole cosmos, is that what God wants is, in fact, to fulfill every desire of our hearts in the right way, a true and good way, and that the path He sets for us of obedience and surrender, trust and abandonment, is in fact the path to perfect self-fulfillment, to having everything just the way (uh huh uh huh)

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Dear Ones -I've been talking about creativity a lot lately...and I think that creativity is one of the most lively expressions of human vitality around.I believe in vitality, because I believe in movement. I believe in change. I believe in surprises. I believe in motion. I believe you can transform at any time. I believe in what the great choreographer Martha Graham said: "Movement never lies."I believe that we live in a dynamic universe — a universe that is still in the process of being created. I believe that our world is in a constant state of unfolding and becoming, shifting and alternating. I believe that our minds, bodies, and souls are also in a constant state of unfolding and becoming...it's just that sometimes we don't believe it.I believe that depression is an evil trick, because depression tries to fool you into thinking that only stagnation is real — that there is no such thing as change, that nothing good will ever come to you, that everything will always suck just as much as it sucks right this minute.As my friend Rob Bell always says: "Despair is a spiritual condition that tells you that tomorrow will be exactly the same as today, when we know from observing the world that this is simply not true."Not only will tomorrow be different from today, but the next instant will be different from the last one. To live a creative life (whether you are an "artist" or not) is to align yourself with the principals of motion, to dive into the ever-flowing current of vitality, to witness change and to allow for change, and to create change.All I want for you guys is to see you standing in your brightest expression of vitality — whatever that might mean to you. I want to see you taking ownership over MOTION. I want to see you believing in change, and altering your own lives. I want to see you living an active life of participation in the strange unfolding of the universe, rather than a passive life of victimization, waiting, or wilting. Try something new.Make today different from yesterday, because today IS different from yesterday. Try things. Break your routine. Believe in change. Perpetuate creative living. Believe in vitality. None of it has to revolutionary. None of it has to have magnitude. None of it has to change your life. But by choosing a motion — instead of remaining inert — you are participating in the miracle of creation. By moving in a vital and intentional way, you are saying, "The universe is unfolding, and so am I."It doesn't all have to be fun. You don't have be happy all the time. As the novelist Gloria Naylor said, "I don't believe that life is supposed to make you feel good, or feel miserable either. Life is just supposed to make you FEEL."I want you to be vital, my friends. I want it more than anything.I want you to feel everything. I want you to pay attention. I want you to cultivate the ability to respond and to act.I want you to live your life wide awake and in constant motion.This is creativity. Onward! LG

As I stand and look ahead, There are so many questions in my head.This little baby, oh so cute,Will she be able, to handle the truth?What will she say? What will she think?What will she feel? When in, it will sink.When she is ready, what will I say?May it be enough, to comfort her, I pray.About her birth mother, what will she ask?What will I do, when faced with this task?Why was she given up? When she will question,Will I be able to give an answer sufficient?Will I stand firm, and honestly answer?Or will I shake, stutter and then shiver?Her mother to find, if she wants to start a search,Will I be the one, the details to merge?As the days fly by, and the time draws near,I pray to the Lord, to make it all clear.To give me the strength, in the storm to stand calm,To hold her together, in the shelter of my arms.Will He keep us strong, to withstand the gale?Through the tempest, may we not fail.May she be able, to make sense of it all,And at the end of it, may she stand tall.

Petronella Eates runs the NGO, Mitr.Art by Rebecca Braganza

A MOTHER'S FEAR

we like it, forever.As the Bible ends 'every tear will be wiped away' (Rev 21:4) – sadness ultimately is done away with in the kingdom, but the path to that kingdom is to forget about ourselves and our own ideas and follow the Lamb wherever he goes (Rev 14:4).

Fr. Denis Lemieux

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JUST ONE THOUGHT

The Mustard Seed as usual comes to you free of charge. However, contributions are welcome. About 2000 copies are being printed and distributed all over India and abroad. Editorial matter, testimonies, cheques / MO may be sent to- Raadhika Dosa D’Cruz, #33 St. Patrick's Town, Solapur Road , Hadapsar , Pune 411013 Cheques to be drawn in the name of Radhika DossaIf you have a friend who would like to receive The Mustard Seed regularly, free of cost, please send in his/her name and address.If you would like to help Save Paper by accepting o n l i n e i s s u e s o f T M S , k i n d l y l e t u s know your email address. Email us at themustardseed.11@gmail.com

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BOOK-POST

Even when the gates of Heaven are closed to prayers, they are open to tears. The Talmud

There is no better exercise for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up. John Anderson

I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I do know; The only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve. Albert Schweitzer

A chemist who can extract from his heart's element, compassion, respect, longing, patience, surprise and forgiveness and compound them into one can creator that atom which is called LOVE. Kahlil GibranEveryone thinks of changing humanity and nobody thinks of changing himself. Leo Tolstoy

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