Are You Faking It?

Are you looking for love or faking it? Take the Challenge Quiz

1. Are you doing the same things over and over? For example, using the same dating websites, hanging out with the same group of people, going to the same events?

2. Are you consistently dating the wrong type of person?

Challenge Quiz

4. Do you change things about you to match the interests of someone you are really into? 5. Do you fear getting really close to someone? 6. Do you have a secret you are embarrassed about? (i.e. financial issues, health issues, body image, addiction) 7. To your core, do you feel love should just happen?

Challenge Quiz

8. Are you dating people who obviously do not want anything serious, hoping they will change their mind?

9. Do you ever feel angry that you are the “only” single person in your social network?

10. Do you feel genuine happiness for others in relationships or jealously?

Did you answer Yes more than once?

Then fix it!

• If you keep doing the same thing, change it. Enlist the help of friends or a professional.

• A matchmaking service too expensive? With all of the money we spend on cars, clothes, accessories, going out etc., a budget can be made for a matchmaking service. It is just like saving up for any other expensive item.

• Make a list of what you really want in a partner and what you are or are not willing to compromise on (we all have to compromise). And trust your gut, if you see red flags, be honest about them and walk away.

• If you fear intimacy or have a secret that weighs heavily on you, seek out the professional help to work on those things. Intimacy issues and secrets put relationships into a tailspin. When you are feeling strong and healthy you tend to make decisions that are right for you and more readily walk away from potential mistakes.

• Love takes work. It takes work to find it and it takes work to keep it. Save the fairytales for the children’s section!

• Anger and jealousy will magnify in all sorts of negative ways. Work on letting go of the negative energy. Negative emotions can come out and be sensed even when you think you are doing a good job of hiding them. Take a fresh look at the relationships around you, and see what you may learn from them.

Sarah Stewart ConsultingWhere change means everything

www.sarahstewartconsulting.com

Sarah E Stewart, MSW, CPC

Author ofBroken in the Back Bay