Role-Play

公司

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第二日番到公司… .

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Topics involved:1.Assertiveness2.Love and dating 3.Self awareness

When getting along with people, especially in a confrontation, people may respond differently.3 styles of behaviors:

1.Aggressive2.Passive3.Assertive

Express your feelings without respecting other people’s right

- having a narrow win

- being annoyed - underperformance when people

are working with you

Boss ( 維爺 ) behave aggressively towards Yin ( 阿賢 )

e.g. force Yin to socialize with him almost every night

violates Yin’ s right to be left alone e.g. Makes Yin annoyed Yin works under great pressure, perform

badly

hide feelings from others let others push you around

- avoid conflicting with other at the scene

- suffer from stress - store up resentment and anger

Yin acts passively in front of his boss e.g. reluctantly be his boss company on a

regular basis avoid direct confrontation less time spent with girl friend heyman( 熙

雯 ) pressure from heyman resentment builds up against his boss

Express your true feelings Respect others Not allow others to take advantage of

you

Yin better adopts assertive behaviors rejects his boss politely at the

beginning may avoid strong resentment in the

end (may not need to quit his job)

There are three types of self-perceptions: An “actual self” It is about the attributes people think they

actually possess. An “ideal self”

It is about the qualities people think that should possess.

An “ought self”

It is about the characteristics people would like to have

Involving mismatches between the actual, ideal self and ought self.

These can cause various effects:

Actual self vs ideal self Once he found that his ability (actual

self) is worse than the ability in his the ideal side (ideal self) he will feel sad and depressed.

Heyman thinks the ideal Yin deserves to get a higher pay job with less working hours so that he can stay with her more frequently.

However, the reality is totally different with the ideal situation. Yin get a low salary job but with long working hours.

Yin feels depressed and dejected.

Actual self vs ought self

Once he found what he can do (actual self) is much less than he should be capable of (ought self) and then he will feel irritable and guilty.

Yin thinks he deserves to get a job that with appropriate working hours. He thinks that his current job match with his qualification but he just want to accompany Heyman more.

However, the reality is quite different from what he thinks. The working hour is far longer than he should have. He cannot spend much time with his family including his girlfriend.

He feels guilty.

Progressing from casual dating to steady dating

Changes involved:1. Increasing expression of feelings (both

positive and negative) potential for growth of intimacy and

conflict

Yin and Heyman share their feelings with each other

e.g. Heyman blames Yin of frequently left her alone

Negative feedback increase conflicts

2. Mutual disclosure of more intimate aspects of the self (e.g. attitudes /values about partner)

Yin and Heyman share their value and attitude towards each other

e.g. Attitude towards Yin’s job Heyman thinks Yin could find a better job

3. Spending more time in each other’s company

e.g. Heyman demands for more company

4. Being together in a wider variety of situations and settings

e.g. Heyman requests Yin to have dinner with her family

Thank you !!!