Family life marriage in islam - spouse selection, marriage contract, rights & duties - dr. khalid siddiqi

Islamic Studies CoursesIslamic Studies CoursesInIn

Chabot, Ohlone, Mission, and De Anza CollegesChabot, Ohlone, Mission, and De Anza CollegesDesigned and TaughtDesigned and Taught

ByByHafiz M. K. Siddiqi, Ph.D.Hafiz M. K. Siddiqi, Ph.D.

Family Life: Selection of Spouse, MarriageFamily Life: Selection of Spouse, MarriageContract, Lessons from the Holy Qur’anContract, Lessons from the Holy Qur’anand the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammadand the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad

pbuh, rights and duties of husband & wifepbuh, rights and duties of husband & wifeand importance of other relationshipsand importance of other relationships

Islamic Studies CoursesIslamic Studies CoursesInIn

Chabot, Ohlone, Mission, and De Anza CollegesChabot, Ohlone, Mission, and De Anza CollegesDesigned and TaughtDesigned and Taught

ByByHafiz M. K. Siddiqi, Ph.D.Hafiz M. K. Siddiqi, Ph.D.

Family Life: Selection of Spouse, MarriageFamily Life: Selection of Spouse, MarriageContract, Lessons from the Holy Qur’anContract, Lessons from the Holy Qur’anand the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammadand the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad

pbuh, rights and duties of husband & wifepbuh, rights and duties of husband & wifeand importance of other relationshipsand importance of other relationships

How to Search for a Spouse?How to Search for a Spouse? Kafaa’ahKafaa’ah: Compatibility in: 1. Education: Compatibility in: 1. Education

2. Religious value system 3. Moral and Ethical2. Religious value system 3. Moral and EthicalValue System.Value System.

Desirable and recommended:Desirable and recommended:

In other areas such as: 1. Cultural backgroundIn other areas such as: 1. Cultural background

2. Hobbies and Interests, etc.2. Hobbies and Interests, etc.

Test of personality: 1. Anger 2. EgoTest of personality: 1. Anger 2. Ego

3. Selfishness 4. Conflict resolution3. Selfishness 4. Conflict resolution

Kafaa’ahKafaa’ah: Compatibility in: 1. Education: Compatibility in: 1. Education

2. Religious value system 3. Moral and Ethical2. Religious value system 3. Moral and EthicalValue System.Value System.

Desirable and recommended:Desirable and recommended:

In other areas such as: 1. Cultural backgroundIn other areas such as: 1. Cultural background

2. Hobbies and Interests, etc.2. Hobbies and Interests, etc.

Test of personality: 1. Anger 2. EgoTest of personality: 1. Anger 2. Ego

3. Selfishness 4. Conflict resolution3. Selfishness 4. Conflict resolution

Marriage ContractMarriage Contract

Mehr/Sadaq: Financial responsibilityMehr/Sadaq: Financial responsibility Consultation with scholars/Counseling in caseConsultation with scholars/Counseling in case

of difficulties or major differences of opinionsof difficulties or major differences of opinions Right to divorce and related issuesRight to divorce and related issues Custody of children and related issuesCustody of children and related issues Possibility of rePossibility of re--marriage in futuremarriage in future Condition to prohibit marrying another wifeCondition to prohibit marrying another wife Premarital CounselingPremarital Counseling

Mehr/Sadaq: Financial responsibilityMehr/Sadaq: Financial responsibility Consultation with scholars/Counseling in caseConsultation with scholars/Counseling in case

of difficulties or major differences of opinionsof difficulties or major differences of opinions Right to divorce and related issuesRight to divorce and related issues Custody of children and related issuesCustody of children and related issues Possibility of rePossibility of re--marriage in futuremarriage in future Condition to prohibit marrying another wifeCondition to prohibit marrying another wife Premarital CounselingPremarital Counseling

Qur’anic TeachingsQur’anic Teachings

4/14/1--23 Discussed the issues of: 1. Equality23 Discussed the issues of: 1. Equality

2. Permissible relationship 3. Continuation of2. Permissible relationship 3. Continuation of

Human race 4. Witnesses 5.Human race 4. Witnesses 5. ArhaamArhaam: Wombs: Wombs

of mothers 6. Question of orphans, polygamy andof mothers 6. Question of orphans, polygamy and

Justice 7. Question of Inheritance 8. Perfection &Justice 7. Question of Inheritance 8. Perfection &

Faults 9.Faults 9. Ma’roofMa’roof 10. Divorce and return of gifts10. Divorce and return of gifts

11. Those who are forbidden to marry11. Those who are forbidden to marry

12.12. MithaqanMithaqan GhaldhaGhaldha..

4/14/1--23 Discussed the issues of: 1. Equality23 Discussed the issues of: 1. Equality

2. Permissible relationship 3. Continuation of2. Permissible relationship 3. Continuation of

Human race 4. Witnesses 5.Human race 4. Witnesses 5. ArhaamArhaam: Wombs: Wombs

of mothers 6. Question of orphans, polygamy andof mothers 6. Question of orphans, polygamy and

Justice 7. Question of Inheritance 8. Perfection &Justice 7. Question of Inheritance 8. Perfection &

Faults 9.Faults 9. Ma’roofMa’roof 10. Divorce and return of gifts10. Divorce and return of gifts

11. Those who are forbidden to marry11. Those who are forbidden to marry

12.12. MithaqanMithaqan GhaldhaGhaldha..

2/187, (Garment) 2/221,(Pagans), 5/52/187, (Garment) 2/221,(Pagans), 5/5

((AhlulAhlul--KitabKitab) 2/231) 2/231--233 (233 (TaradinTaradin WaWa

TashawurTashawur),2/237, (Al),2/237, (Al--FadlFadl), 3/102), 3/102

((TaqwaTaqwa), 33/70), 33/70--71, Truthfulness…… 30/21,71, Truthfulness…… 30/21,((SukunSukun,, MawaddahMawaddah && RahmahRahmah), 65/6), 65/6

(Staying in husband’s home in ‘(Staying in husband’s home in ‘IddahIddah period).period).

66/166/1--2 (Story of honey), 43/70 (Families2 (Story of honey), 43/70 (Families

Enter the garden of Paradise), 13/38 ( theEnter the garden of Paradise), 13/38 ( the

Prophets had families and children).Prophets had families and children).

2/187, (Garment) 2/221,(Pagans), 5/52/187, (Garment) 2/221,(Pagans), 5/5

((AhlulAhlul--KitabKitab) 2/231) 2/231--233 (233 (TaradinTaradin WaWa

TashawurTashawur),2/237, (Al),2/237, (Al--FadlFadl), 3/102), 3/102

((TaqwaTaqwa), 33/70), 33/70--71, Truthfulness…… 30/21,71, Truthfulness…… 30/21,((SukunSukun,, MawaddahMawaddah && RahmahRahmah), 65/6), 65/6

(Staying in husband’s home in ‘(Staying in husband’s home in ‘IddahIddah period).period).

66/166/1--2 (Story of honey), 43/70 (Families2 (Story of honey), 43/70 (Families

Enter the garden of Paradise), 13/38 ( theEnter the garden of Paradise), 13/38 ( the

Prophets had families and children).Prophets had families and children).

From the Prophetic TraditionFrom the Prophetic Tradition

“whoever can afford the marriage…….”“whoever can afford the marriage…….”“A woman is married for 4 reasons….”“A woman is married for 4 reasons….”

“ The whole world is a bounty of Allah…..”“ The whole world is a bounty of Allah…..”“ The marriage is one half of Faith….”“ The marriage is one half of Faith….”“ The marriage is my way of life….”“ The marriage is my way of life….”

“Two important qualities: to follow the“Two important qualities: to follow thereligion and moral Values ….”religion and moral Values ….”

“whoever can afford the marriage…….”“whoever can afford the marriage…….”“A woman is married for 4 reasons….”“A woman is married for 4 reasons….”

“ The whole world is a bounty of Allah…..”“ The whole world is a bounty of Allah…..”“ The marriage is one half of Faith….”“ The marriage is one half of Faith….”“ The marriage is my way of life….”“ The marriage is my way of life….”

“Two important qualities: to follow the“Two important qualities: to follow thereligion and moral Values ….”religion and moral Values ….”

Conditions for the marriage:Conditions for the marriage: I.I. PermissionPermission

of guardian 2. Agreement of the brideof guardian 2. Agreement of the bride 3.3.

Two Witnesses 4. Proposal and acceptanceTwo Witnesses 4. Proposal and acceptance

5. Financial responsibility, performance of5. Financial responsibility, performance of

thethe marriage to teach the couple themarriage to teach the couple the

principles and foundations, the art ofprinciples and foundations, the art of

establishing the good relationship to attainestablishing the good relationship to attain

mutual peace and happinessmutual peace and happiness 6. W6. Whathat

destroys the marriage.destroys the marriage.

Conditions for the marriage:Conditions for the marriage: I.I. PermissionPermission

of guardian 2. Agreement of the brideof guardian 2. Agreement of the bride 3.3.

Two Witnesses 4. Proposal and acceptanceTwo Witnesses 4. Proposal and acceptance

5. Financial responsibility, performance of5. Financial responsibility, performance of

thethe marriage to teach the couple themarriage to teach the couple the

principles and foundations, the art ofprinciples and foundations, the art of

establishing the good relationship to attainestablishing the good relationship to attain

mutual peace and happinessmutual peace and happiness 6. W6. Whathat

destroys the marriage.destroys the marriage.

Rights and DutiesRights and Duties

They share this with each other: 1. Mutual rights:They share this with each other: 1. Mutual rights:

Intimacy has to be with mutual agreement and with dueIntimacy has to be with mutual agreement and with due

mutual consideration.2. Change of status: the wifemutual consideration.2. Change of status: the wife

becomes unlawful to marry father, grand father….,becomes unlawful to marry father, grand father….,sons, grand sons great grand sons…and other branchessons, grand sons great grand sons…and other branches

of her husband. The husband becomes unlawful toof her husband. The husband becomes unlawful to

Marry wife’s mother, grandmother……daughterMarry wife’s mother, grandmother……daughterGrand daughter…and branches.Grand daughter…and branches.

They share this with each other: 1. Mutual rights:They share this with each other: 1. Mutual rights:

Intimacy has to be with mutual agreement and with dueIntimacy has to be with mutual agreement and with due

mutual consideration.2. Change of status: the wifemutual consideration.2. Change of status: the wife

becomes unlawful to marry father, grand father….,becomes unlawful to marry father, grand father….,sons, grand sons great grand sons…and other branchessons, grand sons great grand sons…and other branches

of her husband. The husband becomes unlawful toof her husband. The husband becomes unlawful to

Marry wife’s mother, grandmother……daughterMarry wife’s mother, grandmother……daughterGrand daughter…and branches.Grand daughter…and branches.

3. Right to inheritance: as soon as marriage vows3. Right to inheritance: as soon as marriage vows

Are done, they will inherit each other if one of themAre done, they will inherit each other if one of them

Dies even if the marriage was not consummated.Dies even if the marriage was not consummated.

4. Legitimacy of child: any children born in this4. Legitimacy of child: any children born in this

Wedlock will be lawful.Wedlock will be lawful.

5. Mutual treatment on the basis of5. Mutual treatment on the basis of Ma’roofMa’roof(equitable terms):A. Mutual mercifulness B. Mutual(equitable terms):A. Mutual mercifulness B. Mutual

Tenderheartedness C. Mutual consultationTenderheartedness C. Mutual consultation

D. Mutual agreement E. Mutual use of beautifulD. Mutual agreement E. Mutual use of beautiful

Words in addressing each otherWords in addressing each other

3. Right to inheritance: as soon as marriage vows3. Right to inheritance: as soon as marriage vows

Are done, they will inherit each other if one of themAre done, they will inherit each other if one of them

Dies even if the marriage was not consummated.Dies even if the marriage was not consummated.

4. Legitimacy of child: any children born in this4. Legitimacy of child: any children born in this

Wedlock will be lawful.Wedlock will be lawful.

5. Mutual treatment on the basis of5. Mutual treatment on the basis of Ma’roofMa’roof(equitable terms):A. Mutual mercifulness B. Mutual(equitable terms):A. Mutual mercifulness B. Mutual

Tenderheartedness C. Mutual consultationTenderheartedness C. Mutual consultation

D. Mutual agreement E. Mutual use of beautifulD. Mutual agreement E. Mutual use of beautiful

Words in addressing each otherWords in addressing each other

Social: 1. Mutual consideration to avoidSocial: 1. Mutual consideration to avoidsocializing with individuals and groups whosocializing with individuals and groups who

are undesirable to one or the other spouseare undesirable to one or the other spouse

2. No friendship with opposite sex 3. Do not2. No friendship with opposite sex 3. Do notinvite in to your house the opposite sexinvite in to your house the opposite sex

guests or visitors when your spouse is notguests or visitors when your spouse is nothome. 4. Do not socialize with badhome. 4. Do not socialize with bad

individuals and groups 5. Do not socializeindividuals and groups 5. Do not socializewith nonwith non--practicing individuals or groupspracticing individuals or groups

unless you intend to help them practice theunless you intend to help them practice thereligious and moral values.religious and moral values.

Social: 1. Mutual consideration to avoidSocial: 1. Mutual consideration to avoidsocializing with individuals and groups whosocializing with individuals and groups who

are undesirable to one or the other spouseare undesirable to one or the other spouse

2. No friendship with opposite sex 3. Do not2. No friendship with opposite sex 3. Do notinvite in to your house the opposite sexinvite in to your house the opposite sex

guests or visitors when your spouse is notguests or visitors when your spouse is nothome. 4. Do not socialize with badhome. 4. Do not socialize with bad

individuals and groups 5. Do not socializeindividuals and groups 5. Do not socializewith nonwith non--practicing individuals or groupspracticing individuals or groups

unless you intend to help them practice theunless you intend to help them practice thereligious and moral values.religious and moral values.

The rights of wife are the duties of husband:The rights of wife are the duties of husband:1.Religious and Financial: A.1.Religious and Financial: A. SadaqSadaq//MehrMehr::

Compulsory marriage gift negotiated by the wifeCompulsory marriage gift negotiated by the wifeand given by the husband as a true financialand given by the husband as a true financial

Commitment. B. A promise to provide financialCommitment. B. A promise to provide financialsafety and security for the wife, in case of divorce.safety and security for the wife, in case of divorce.C. Total responsibility of household expenditure:C. Total responsibility of household expenditure:food, shelter, clothes, medical treatment and otherfood, shelter, clothes, medical treatment and other

Necessities of life, according to husband’s capacity.Necessities of life, according to husband’s capacity.D. Companionship and friendship here and in theD. Companionship and friendship here and in the

hereafter.hereafter.

The rights of wife are the duties of husband:The rights of wife are the duties of husband:1.Religious and Financial: A.1.Religious and Financial: A. SadaqSadaq//MehrMehr::

Compulsory marriage gift negotiated by the wifeCompulsory marriage gift negotiated by the wifeand given by the husband as a true financialand given by the husband as a true financial

Commitment. B. A promise to provide financialCommitment. B. A promise to provide financialsafety and security for the wife, in case of divorce.safety and security for the wife, in case of divorce.C. Total responsibility of household expenditure:C. Total responsibility of household expenditure:food, shelter, clothes, medical treatment and otherfood, shelter, clothes, medical treatment and other

Necessities of life, according to husband’s capacity.Necessities of life, according to husband’s capacity.D. Companionship and friendship here and in theD. Companionship and friendship here and in the

hereafter.hereafter.

2. Ethical: A. Dignity and respect B. Address with2. Ethical: A. Dignity and respect B. Address with

beautifully selected words C. Prohibition of anybeautifully selected words C. Prohibition of any

kind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit orkind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit or

Explicit D. Hiding the faults and short comingsExplicit D. Hiding the faults and short comings

E. Speaking about the brighter aspects of herE. Speaking about the brighter aspects of her

Character F. Adjust, accommodate and modifyCharacter F. Adjust, accommodate and modify

your behavior according to the changingyour behavior according to the changing

conditions G. Tolerance, forgiveness, andconditions G. Tolerance, forgiveness, and

Generosity in daily interactions. H. Absolutely noGenerosity in daily interactions. H. Absolutely no

Communication with anger, selfishness, and ego.Communication with anger, selfishness, and ego.


beautifully selected words C. Prohibition of anybeautifully selected words C. Prohibition of any

kind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit orkind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit or

Explicit D. Hiding the faults and short comingsExplicit D. Hiding the faults and short comings

E. Speaking about the brighter aspects of herE. Speaking about the brighter aspects of her

Character F. Adjust, accommodate and modifyCharacter F. Adjust, accommodate and modify

your behavior according to the changingyour behavior according to the changing

conditions G. Tolerance, forgiveness, andconditions G. Tolerance, forgiveness, and

Generosity in daily interactions. H. Absolutely noGenerosity in daily interactions. H. Absolutely no

Communication with anger, selfishness, and ego.Communication with anger, selfishness, and ego.

3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with her3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with her

B. Fulfilling her needs of intimacy C. Allowing herB. Fulfilling her needs of intimacy C. Allowing her

to say no to your needs of intimacy if she is notto say no to your needs of intimacy if she is not

feeling well or not in mood. D. Allow her tofeeling well or not in mood. D. Allow her to

maintain a decent level of relationship with hermaintain a decent level of relationship with her

blood relatives and be generous with your inblood relatives and be generous with your in--laws.laws.

E. Do not spy on her F. Do not mistrust her G. TrustE. Do not spy on her F. Do not mistrust her G. Trust

Her H. Protect her I. Do not mistreat, insult,Her H. Protect her I. Do not mistreat, insult,

Disrespect, or cause any harm to her blood relativesDisrespect, or cause any harm to her blood relatives

J. Treat her as you want her to treat you.J. Treat her as you want her to treat you.

3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with her3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with her

B. Fulfilling her needs of intimacy C. Allowing herB. Fulfilling her needs of intimacy C. Allowing her

to say no to your needs of intimacy if she is notto say no to your needs of intimacy if she is not

feeling well or not in mood. D. Allow her tofeeling well or not in mood. D. Allow her to

maintain a decent level of relationship with hermaintain a decent level of relationship with her

blood relatives and be generous with your inblood relatives and be generous with your in--laws.laws.

E. Do not spy on her F. Do not mistrust her G. TrustE. Do not spy on her F. Do not mistrust her G. Trust

Her H. Protect her I. Do not mistreat, insult,Her H. Protect her I. Do not mistreat, insult,

Disrespect, or cause any harm to her blood relativesDisrespect, or cause any harm to her blood relatives

J. Treat her as you want her to treat you.J. Treat her as you want her to treat you.

The rights of Husband are the duties of wife: Religious andThe rights of Husband are the duties of wife: Religious and

financial: A. Protect his money from misuse, abuse, andfinancial: A. Protect his money from misuse, abuse, and

waste B. Save and help him save in food, shelter, clothes,waste B. Save and help him save in food, shelter, clothes,

necessities of life, whenever it is possible C. Don’tnecessities of life, whenever it is possible C. Don’tencourage him to have an extravagant life style D. Neverencourage him to have an extravagant life style D. Never

buy any thing if you can not afford it. Have the habit ofbuy any thing if you can not afford it. Have the habit of

purchasing the necessities of life if only you can affordpurchasing the necessities of life if only you can afford

them. E. Make a budget with your husband and save athem. E. Make a budget with your husband and save a

percentage of his income for a rainy day, education of yourpercentage of his income for a rainy day, education of your

children, their weddings, and for vacations F. Keep awaychildren, their weddings, and for vacations F. Keep away

From credit cards, loans etc.From credit cards, loans etc.

The rights of Husband are the duties of wife: Religious andThe rights of Husband are the duties of wife: Religious and

financial: A. Protect his money from misuse, abuse, andfinancial: A. Protect his money from misuse, abuse, and

waste B. Save and help him save in food, shelter, clothes,waste B. Save and help him save in food, shelter, clothes,

necessities of life, whenever it is possible C. Don’tnecessities of life, whenever it is possible C. Don’tencourage him to have an extravagant life style D. Neverencourage him to have an extravagant life style D. Never

buy any thing if you can not afford it. Have the habit ofbuy any thing if you can not afford it. Have the habit of

purchasing the necessities of life if only you can affordpurchasing the necessities of life if only you can afford

them. E. Make a budget with your husband and save athem. E. Make a budget with your husband and save a

percentage of his income for a rainy day, education of yourpercentage of his income for a rainy day, education of your

children, their weddings, and for vacations F. Keep awaychildren, their weddings, and for vacations F. Keep away

From credit cards, loans etc.From credit cards, loans etc.

G. Obey him as long as he does not ask you toG. Obey him as long as he does not ask you to

disobey Allahdisobey Allah swtswt H. Wear makeH. Wear make--up and beautifyup and beautify

yourself for meeting with your husband. The Holyyourself for meeting with your husband. The Holy

Qur’an has recommended that righteous womenQur’an has recommended that righteous womenReserve their beauty and ornaments to display inReserve their beauty and ornaments to display in

front of their husbands. I. Do not speak about yourfront of their husbands. I. Do not speak about your

Intimacy with your husband to any of your friends,Intimacy with your husband to any of your friends,

Nor inform your husband about the hidden beautiesNor inform your husband about the hidden beauties

of your female friends.of your female friends.

G. Obey him as long as he does not ask you toG. Obey him as long as he does not ask you to

disobey Allahdisobey Allah swtswt H. Wear makeH. Wear make--up and beautifyup and beautify

yourself for meeting with your husband. The Holyyourself for meeting with your husband. The Holy

Qur’an has recommended that righteous womenQur’an has recommended that righteous womenReserve their beauty and ornaments to display inReserve their beauty and ornaments to display in

front of their husbands. I. Do not speak about yourfront of their husbands. I. Do not speak about your

Intimacy with your husband to any of your friends,Intimacy with your husband to any of your friends,

Nor inform your husband about the hidden beautiesNor inform your husband about the hidden beauties

of your female friends.of your female friends.

J. Please him whenever he looks at you K. FulfillJ. Please him whenever he looks at you K. Fulfill

his demands if they are not disobedience to Allahhis demands if they are not disobedience to Allah

swtswt L. Protect his interest in yourself and his wealthL. Protect his interest in yourself and his wealth

and trusts M. Obey Allah in everything that you do.and trusts M. Obey Allah in everything that you do.


beautifully selected words C. Prohibition of anybeautifully selected words C. Prohibition of anykind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit orkind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit or

Explicit. D. Hiding the faults and short comings.Explicit. D. Hiding the faults and short comings.

E. Speaking about the brighter aspects of hisE. Speaking about the brighter aspects of his

Character. F. Adjust, accommodate and modifyCharacter. F. Adjust, accommodate and modify

your behavior according to the changing conditionsyour behavior according to the changing conditions

J. Please him whenever he looks at you K. FulfillJ. Please him whenever he looks at you K. Fulfill

his demands if they are not disobedience to Allahhis demands if they are not disobedience to Allah

swtswt L. Protect his interest in yourself and his wealthL. Protect his interest in yourself and his wealth

and trusts M. Obey Allah in everything that you do.and trusts M. Obey Allah in everything that you do.


beautifully selected words C. Prohibition of anybeautifully selected words C. Prohibition of anykind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit orkind of harm: mental, physical, verbal, implicit or

Explicit. D. Hiding the faults and short comings.Explicit. D. Hiding the faults and short comings.

E. Speaking about the brighter aspects of hisE. Speaking about the brighter aspects of his

Character. F. Adjust, accommodate and modifyCharacter. F. Adjust, accommodate and modify

your behavior according to the changing conditionsyour behavior according to the changing conditions

3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with him3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with him

B. Fulfilling his needs of intimacy C. Allowing himB. Fulfilling his needs of intimacy C. Allowing him

to say no to your needs of intimacy if he is notto say no to your needs of intimacy if he is not

feeling well or not in mood. D. Encourage him tofeeling well or not in mood. D. Encourage him to

maintain a decent level of relationship with hismaintain a decent level of relationship with his

blood relatives and be generous with them.blood relatives and be generous with them.

E. Do not spy on him F. Do not mistrust him G.E. Do not spy on him F. Do not mistrust him G.

Trust him H. Protect him I. Do not mistreat, insult,Trust him H. Protect him I. Do not mistreat, insult,

Disrespect, or cause any harm to his blood relativesDisrespect, or cause any harm to his blood relatives

J. Treat him as you want him to treat you.J. Treat him as you want him to treat you.

3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with him3. Emotional: A. Spending quality time with him

B. Fulfilling his needs of intimacy C. Allowing himB. Fulfilling his needs of intimacy C. Allowing him

to say no to your needs of intimacy if he is notto say no to your needs of intimacy if he is not

feeling well or not in mood. D. Encourage him tofeeling well or not in mood. D. Encourage him to

maintain a decent level of relationship with hismaintain a decent level of relationship with his

blood relatives and be generous with them.blood relatives and be generous with them.

E. Do not spy on him F. Do not mistrust him G.E. Do not spy on him F. Do not mistrust him G.

Trust him H. Protect him I. Do not mistreat, insult,Trust him H. Protect him I. Do not mistreat, insult,

Disrespect, or cause any harm to his blood relativesDisrespect, or cause any harm to his blood relatives

J. Treat him as you want him to treat you.J. Treat him as you want him to treat you.

1.Relationship with parents must be on the basis of1.Relationship with parents must be on the basis of

number one priority, generosity, and utmost care. Itnumber one priority, generosity, and utmost care. It

is beautifully described in 17/23is beautifully described in 17/23--24.24.

2. Relationship with the children has to be one of2. Relationship with the children has to be one of

providing guidance, practical role model, the bestproviding guidance, practical role model, the best

of physical, intellectual, and spiritual education andof physical, intellectual, and spiritual education and

Training. 3. Relationship with relatives has to beTraining. 3. Relationship with relatives has to be

one of maintaining decency by exchanging visitsone of maintaining decency by exchanging visits

and gifts and generously treating with financialand gifts and generously treating with financial

help the poor ones of them, in a respectful manner.help the poor ones of them, in a respectful manner.

1.Relationship with parents must be on the basis of1.Relationship with parents must be on the basis of

number one priority, generosity, and utmost care. Itnumber one priority, generosity, and utmost care. It

is beautifully described in 17/23is beautifully described in 17/23--24.24.

2. Relationship with the children has to be one of2. Relationship with the children has to be one of

providing guidance, practical role model, the bestproviding guidance, practical role model, the best

of physical, intellectual, and spiritual education andof physical, intellectual, and spiritual education and

Training. 3. Relationship with relatives has to beTraining. 3. Relationship with relatives has to be

one of maintaining decency by exchanging visitsone of maintaining decency by exchanging visits

and gifts and generously treating with financialand gifts and generously treating with financial

help the poor ones of them, in a respectful manner.help the poor ones of them, in a respectful manner.

The relationship with the people of scriptures (JewsThe relationship with the people of scriptures (Jews

and Christians has to be one of respect, dignity andand Christians has to be one of respect, dignity and

recognition the Holy Qur’an is full of connectionsrecognition the Holy Qur’an is full of connectionswith the people of scripture. A Muslim is requiredwith the people of scripture. A Muslim is required

to maintain decent relationship with them. The restto maintain decent relationship with them. The rest

of the humankind will also be treated with love andof the humankind will also be treated with love and

kindness and justice and fairness as mentioned inkindness and justice and fairness as mentioned in

60/8. So, the basic principle to be followed as60/8. So, the basic principle to be followed as

regard to all categories of relationship, withregard to all categories of relationship, with

Muslims and none Muslims is Birr andMuslims and none Muslims is Birr and QistQist..

The relationship with the people of scriptures (JewsThe relationship with the people of scriptures (Jews

and Christians has to be one of respect, dignity andand Christians has to be one of respect, dignity and

recognition the Holy Qur’an is full of connectionsrecognition the Holy Qur’an is full of connectionswith the people of scripture. A Muslim is requiredwith the people of scripture. A Muslim is required

to maintain decent relationship with them. The restto maintain decent relationship with them. The rest

of the humankind will also be treated with love andof the humankind will also be treated with love and

kindness and justice and fairness as mentioned inkindness and justice and fairness as mentioned in

60/8. So, the basic principle to be followed as60/8. So, the basic principle to be followed as

regard to all categories of relationship, withregard to all categories of relationship, with

Muslims and none Muslims is Birr andMuslims and none Muslims is Birr and QistQist..