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10 ways to build
good coworker
relationshipsByScott Mattesonin10 Things, July 23, 2013, 1:35 PM
PST //scott_matteson
Good office etiquette helps build the
foundation for a healthy workenvironment. Here are 10 tips to make
the most of your interactions with
coworkers.
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After working in a variety of companies both small and
large, I have learned how to spot the difference between
committed employees who are in it for the long haul and
temporary faces who will move on down the line. You
can tell the "keepers" based upon how they get along
with others in the office: They engage people in a
professional and respectful manner that adheres to
certain traits. This helps the business's bottom line, since
positive employee interaction drives the organization.
Building employee morale has been a common theme
among management as of late. Company socials and
outings, promoting exercise through walk-a-thons or
friendly weight-loss contests, and other mood-boosting
strategies are fine (although I felt a mandatory high-school-style company rally at one business I worked was
a bit much).
But fancy plans aren't always needed. Sometimes the
simple approach is the best. So I've put together this list
of 10 things I have found invaluable in maintainingpositive relations at work based on the traits I referred to
above. Best of all, these tips don't cost money!
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1: Practice common courtesy
This one should be self-explanatory, but I live in New
England, which can be known for standoffish attitudes.
Look, there's nothing creepier than walking down the hall
at work and greeting a coworker with a friendly "Hello"
only to receive a stony stare in response (or no
acknowledgment at all). I'm not saying you should throw
confetti and hand out balloons, but a simple exchange of
smiles and a "Hi" is the first step in forming a
constructive workplace. Make eye contact and refer to
people by name. This is the oil that keeps the engine of
cooperation running smoothly. It doesn't mean you have
to chat over coffee for an hour and it certainly doesn't
mean you have to kiss anyone.
Furthermore, keep in mind office life is much like having
roommates. Don't be the guy (or girl) who left the fish
sandwich in the fridge for two weeks, or finished the last
Keurig cup without opening another box. If your feet
noticeably sweat, sandals at work may be a bad idea.And so forth.
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2: Use efective
communications
Learn who works best through email, phone, instant
messaging, or personal visits and try to utilize these
preferences when engaging your coworkers. Some
people prefer email since they like to keep a written
record of their actions or responses to questions (or they
may be online late at night getting caught up). Others willvalue a phone call more since it's a quicker medium of
communication.
I have found email is usually the standard. When it
comes to a powerful email strategy, my four corners are:
1.Always make sure the subject line is helpful (e.g.,
"question about expiration of paid time off" and not
"question") and keep the email as concise and on-
topic as possible.
2.Leave people out of emails/meeting requests if they
don't need to attend or be kept in the loop on the
topic, so they won't see your emails as meaningless
spam.
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3.If you bring others into a conversation, let them know
why; don't just CC them on a huge email trail. For
instance, you might say, "Jeff, I'm including you
because you have some good insights on foreign
exchange rates and I remember you just got back
from England."
4.Don't reply to previous emails to start a new
conversation unless it has some bearing on the
current topic.
Sometimes we find we're not getting the results we need
from coworkers. Emails and voicemails may go ignored
(or it can seem that way). Think before banging out a
huffy email and cc:ing someone's manager -- this latter
tactic can be a disaster for cordial relations unless otheravenues have been tried first. Maybe it would make more
sense to politely ask your coworker in person about the
issue? They may be too tied up to check messages and
can refer you to another resource in the company. Unless
you have a clear-cut reason to assume someone is
blowing you off, give them the benefit of the doubt. If theyare dragging their feet deliberately, I recommend
approaching your own manager first for assistance.
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3: Respect other people's time
Every job is a service job. Whether you work in IT, HR,
Marketing, or Administration, you have something other
people need. It could be know-how in your job role or the
capability to perform certain business functions, like
signing purchase orders.
Unless it's a genuine emergency, don't hover outside
someone's cube/office while they're busy with someone
else, to "wait for them to get off the phone," or finish an
existing conversation; just come back later. They will see
you and feel pressured to get rid of the existing visitor or
end the phone call. Similarly, don't hand off work
requests in the hall, kitchen, bathroom, or outside theoffice. (On one occasion, I bumped into someone at the
grocery store on Saturday who asked me to get a new
computer for her at the office and wanted an ETA on the
spot!) The line between work and personal lives should
be respected.
Conduct business operations with others at times that
are convenient for both parties. Nobody should ever
dread running into you, and they certainly shouldn't
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your network group to open ports in the firewall, research
the ports and the IP addresses of the hosts involved
instead of just emailing them to ask "Can you allow
remote desktop access from outside the company?"
People will know you've done the legwork and will
appreciate that.
Some things are best left to the professionals, of course.
If the other guy on your IT team is responsible for makingDNS changes you could easily perform yourself, you
shouldn't proceed on his turf unless he's given you
permission to do so and is aware of your action.
5: Proceed ith caution on
social media
A plethora of social media vehicles come and go;
Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn -- anyone remember
MySpace? However, there's really nothing different about
interacting with coworkers on social media as compared
to the standard rules of real life that have been around
for decades. (Of course, you should review your
company's social media policy to be aware of the
requirements.)
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If you do connect with coworkers through social media,
don't engage in inappropriate relationships and don't
present an unprofessional side of yourself. We've all
heard that it's dumb to post drunken Facebook photos,
but a better rule would be to keep any controversial
interests or hobbies separate from your coworkers. Don't
share confidential information about the company or
other workers. Pretend the company president (or board
of directors) is personally following your every move onsocial media and act accordingly. Your job and
maintaining the operations and integrity of the company
is the priority. A better option might be to restrict work
connections to LinkedIn and leave Facebook for "real-life
friends," family, neighbors, and so forth.
!: "tay on the level
Treat everyone the same. Office politics can be deadly
and sometimes even unavoidable, but reduce your
involvement in them wherever possible. Don't gossip or
get involved in it when others do. I've seen instanceswhere bad blood developed among employees who kept
"whispering" rude things about people they didn't like
through instant messaging services. Guess what
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happened when one of them left their computer
unattended? Everyone got a free trip to see the VP of HR
and all of them were gone within a few months -- except
the target of their discussions!
The person you hired might wind up being your boss one
day, and your manager might get transferred elsewhere
then transferred back to become the one in charge
again. I have seen both instances happen in real life,proving that staying on a friendly (or at the very least
neutral) basis with everyone possible is always the best
policy.
#: $on't %ripe a&out or at
or
Everyone vents about the job at times. We are a vent-
oriented society. Unless you're an ice cream tester or a
gourmet food critic, chances are your job produces
stress. Griping is okay -- so long as you do it to your
significant other, relative, non-work friend, or dog. Keep it
outside the company if you can, though.
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There's a line in the movie Saving Private Ryan where
Tom Hanks, the captain of the unit assigned to find and
rescue Private Ryan, tells his subordinates, "Gripes go
up, not down. Always up. You gripe to me, I gripe to my
superior officer, so on, so on, and so on. I don't gripe to
you. I don't gripe in front of you. You should know that as
a Ranger." That's excellent advice. Managers should
never display frustration about the company to their staff.
It will trickle around; that's a guarantee.
Getting paid to complain about work while you're at work
is a little over the top and just fosters an unhealthy
victimhood culture. If there's something you can do, do it.
If not, address it through the healthiest means possible.
(: Put out a elcome mat
Go out of your way to make new hires welcome. Don't
act like you're part of the "Old Timers" network and these
young upstarts are trying to crash the party or intrude on
your home ground. You once lived through the first dayon the job, too. It's not just for the sake of being friendly
and making people feel at home; remember tip #6 that
new hire might be a VP in five years. I'm not saying this
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In those instances, I recommend asking Ted to talk to the
boss and explain what happened on his own. If he's
unavailable (or perhaps tied up frantically mounting the
Exchange databases) and someone in charge presses
you for more information, you should describe exactly
what happened. However, do so from the standpoint of
an impartial observer: "Mistakes were made. Ted can
describe what happened better than I, and I want to
make it clear I'm not throwing him under the bus here,but the server was shut down accidentally. Log Off is
similar to Shut Down on that Start Menu." Don't
respond like a participant trying to bail himself out.
I have found that a post-mortem analyzing disasters like
this and what controls will be put in place to preventfuture occurrences can be extremely helpful in solving
tensions that erupt when things go awry.
1*: +ollo up ith people
Believe me, this one goes a long way. When you'vecompleted a task involving others, it takes 20 seconds to
bang out an email a couple of days later asking "Did that
work for you?" or "How are things going?" Every time
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I've done it this has solidified relations by showing the
other party I care how things turned out, and I didn't just
treat them like a hot potato to be tossed onto a plate and
served to someone else.
,onclusion
These strategies may be common sense, but they can
complement an agenda-oriented workplace (isn't that the
purpose of business?) to help keep the wheels of
business turning in a healthy and productive fashion. If
you have other tips and suggestions I'd love to hear more
in the comments section!
-&out "cott .attesonScott Matteson is a senior systems administrator and freelance technical writer who also
performs consulting work for small organizations. He resides in the Greater Boston area with his
wife and three children.
Full Bio Contact
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Develop GoodCoworker Relations
Maintain peace and fun at work throughyour associationsfrom Stealth Health
Essential Bonds
You can pick your friends, but you cant pick your
coworkers. Yet you need these guys in more ways than one.
First, you need their goodwill and cooperation in order to
perform your own job well. Second, studies find that
disagreements with coworkers and bad interoffice
relationships deflate morale and impair performance even
more than rumors of layoffs.
8/10/2019 10 Ways to Build Good Coworker Relationships
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ComstockComplete
You don't have to be a Pollyanna, but try toperform one act of kindness a week, choosing adifferent coworker each time
And third, if youre like most people, you spend morewaking hours at work than anywhere else. eaching out toyour colleagues ! or e"tending an olive branch, if need be !can make your work environment a much nicer place inwhich to spend eight #or $% or $& or $'( hours a day even asit increases your job security. #)n the event of a layoff,chances are the office loner or grouch is among the first togo.(
You dont have to be friends with your coworkers, but you
do need to be friendly. ead on for fresh ways to make work
a kinder, gentler place.
1. Give a happy Hello! in the morning.*o you plod
into the office, eyes down, shoulders slumped, andimmediately start work+ )f so, youre likely to find that
coworkers ignore you #at best( or avoid you #at worst(. et
into the habit of smiling and greeting your colleagues as you
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'. (%%ept good)nat*red teasing.6ther workers
sometimes play jokes and tease to test what kind of person
you are. So if they poke fun at your new shoes ormischievously put a racy screensaver on your computer,
dont get angry. et them know that you love a good joke !
even if its sometimes on you. 6f course, if the teasing is
personal #about your weight or ethnicity, for e"ample(,
makes it difficult for you to do your job, or makes you feeluncomfortable because of its se"ual implications, you may
need to take up the matter with your supervisor.
+. (sk what they think.0eople love to be asked their
opinion, so go out of your way to ask, 49hat do you thinkbelongs in this report+5 or, 4:ow do you think ) should
handle this situation with client ;+5 2hen give the advice
giver a sincere thank
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tidbit of gossip about =ettys office romance or =ills
impending firing, respond with, 4eally+5 and then change
the subject or get back to work. )f you dont respond, thegossiper will move on ! and youll retain the trust and
respect of your colleagues.
Be (mi%a&le. /hen dealing with a di""i%*lt
%oworker0 pretend yo*r kids arewat%hing.2his neat little visuali-ation willhelp you keep a cool head. After all, youvetaught your children to be mannerly. 9iththem 4watching5 you, it will be difficult tostoop to the level of your infuriating colleague.
. adle o*t the %ompliments.*id 2om fi"the office copier ! again+ :as the >uietsecretary in the cubicle behind you lost &?pounds+ =y all means, compliment yourcoworkers on their achievements ! personal
or professional. 2oo often, we focus on whatpeople are doing wrong.
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2. -pread yo*r good %heer.You dont haveto be a 0ollyanna, but try to perform one act ofkindness a week, choosing a different coworkereach time. For e"ample, one week you mightbring in doughnuts for no reason. Anotherweek, it might be a card for a colleague !maybe a thankuette. 2heres nothing morefrustrating to busy coworkers than to havetheir emails and phone messages ignored.Your silence doesnt just make their jobsharder@ it also conveys an unpleasant messageYoure unimportant to me.
11. Give %redit where %redit is d*e.*ontwithhold credit from deserving coworkers.Youll alienate them, and they wont be there
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people you work with that youre a person first,not just an employee or employer.
1,. (ss*me the positive a&o*t what yo*don4t know.Funny how a team of workersalways think theyre working harder than thoseyahoos down the hall, and that the bosses areclueless. *ont subscribe to that kind of to"icthinking, even if its rampant. )ts a negativeattitude that makes work become miserable.)nstead, assume that everyone else is workinghard and doing their best, even if you dontknow what their work is. You should believeboth in the work youre doing and theorgani-ation youre doing it for. )f you cant,perhaps its time to move on.
ead
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