What We Believe: Forgiveness and Reconciliation

What We Believe: Forgiveness and Reconciliation

Jaimée Allman & Geoffrey Sutton

Evangel University

Allman & Sutton, 2008-2009 1

Overview

Our purpose was to explore how participants conceptualize forgiveness, reconciliation, guilt, and trust, as well as the relationship between the aforementioned variables to willingness to forgive, and to spirituality.


Scripture

The text of Matthew 6 suggests an expectation of reconciliation.

Matthew 6 and Matthew 18 suggest negative consequences for failing to forgive.


What is Forgiveness?

Despite exponential growth in published research on the psychology of forgiveness, researchers have not reached a consensus on a definition of forgiveness (Worthington, 2006).


Something in Common

Some psychological researchers have noted commonalities such as noting that forgiving an offender is distinct from condoning, denying, excusing, forgetting, or pardoning an offender (Enright & Coyle, 1998; McCullough, Bono, & Root, 2005).


Forgiveness & Reconciliation

Most psychological researchers also assert that forgiveness is distinct from reconciliation (e.g., Enright, Gassin, & Wu, 1992; Sutton & Thomas, 2005b; Worthington & Drinkard, 2000).

Forgiveness is intrapersonal

Reconciliation is interpersonal


A Difference

In contrast to these conceptualizations, Aquino, Tripp, and Bies (2001) viewed reconciliation as a behavioral manifestation of forgiveness.


Research by Kanz, 2000

Most undergraduate respondents did not distinguish between the concepts of forgiveness and reconciliation.

This forgiveness-reconciliation issue is a key focus of our study along with looking at the parameters of forgiveness in “everyday use.”


Our Purpose

1. We hypothesized that we would find support for Kanz’ findings that forgiveness and reconciliation are overlapping concepts for most people.

2. We hypothesized that most participants would recognize the difference between forgiveness and select related concepts like trust and apology.


Our Purpose

3. We hypothesized that most participants would recognize the difference between forgiveness and the restoration of errant leaders

Here we report some initial findings…


General Procedure

• Presented packets to students– Consent signed

– Forgiveness concept items

– Two measures

– Demographic questions

– Explained survey at the end


Study Materials

• Forgiveness survey 14 items: Likert type (Adapted from Kanz, 2000)

• Willingness to Forgive 12 item Likert type scale (DeShea, 2003)

• Santa Clara Strength of Religious Faith5 item Likert type scale (Plante et al., 2002)


Participants

Christian College

Women = 113

Men = 52

Age (M = 19.42, SD = 2.11)

Non-Christian College

Women = 32

Men = 10

Age (M = 20.69, SD = 6.38)


Participants

Christian College

Ethnicity Percent

European 83.1

African 3.6

Hispanic 4.2

Native American 1.2


Ethnicity Percent

European 79.5

African 4.5

Hispanic 2.3

Asian/Pacific 2.3

Other 6.8

Not reporting 4.5


Participants

Christian College

Willingness to Forgive

M = 41.87, SD = 11.48

Coeff alpha = .91

Spirituality (Santa Clara)

M = 17.51, SD =2.48

Coeff alpha = .83


Willingness to Forgive

M = 41.28, SD = 13.98

Coeff alpha = .93

Spirituality (Santa Clara)

M = 14.44, SD = 4.12

Coeff alpha = .91


Survey Results

Strongly Agree +Agree =Agree percentage

Strongly Disagree + Disagree = Disagree percentage.

We did not include the neutral percentage, which can be deduced by subtraction.

We invite you to interact with us by considering each question.


1: Christians are more forgiving

1: In general, Christians are more forgiving than non-Christians.


1: In general, Christians are more forgiving than non-Christians.

Non-Christian CollegeAgree 38.6 ; Disagree 36.4

Christian College Agree 33.1; Disagree 36.1


2: An apology is necessary

2: An apology is necessary before I would forgive someone for other than a minor offense.


2: An apology is necessary before I would forgive someone for other than a minor offense.




3. Forgiveness is Christian

3: Forgiveness is primarily a Christian idea.


3: Forgiveness is primarily a Christian idea.Non-Christian CollegeAgree 11.3 ; Disagree 70.4



4. guilt

4: I feel guilty if I do not forgive someone.


4: I feel guilty if I do not forgive someone.




5. friend versus stranger

5: It is easier to forgive a friend or family member than a stranger for the same offense.


5: It is easier to forgive a friend or family member than a stranger for the same offense.


Christian College Agree 40; Disagree 45.5


6. Forgive and forget?

6: I think true forgiveness means you try to forget what the person did to you.


6: I think true forgiveness means you try to forget what the person did to you.




7. reconciliation

7: I think true forgiveness means you also reconcile with the person who offended you.


7: I think true forgiveness means you also reconcile with the person who offended you.




8. admit and change

8: People need to admit what they have done and change before you forgive them.


8: People need to admit what they have done and change before you forgive them.




9. restoration

9: If someone lost their job or position of leadership because of wrongdoing, then forgiveness means they must be restored to their former position.


9: If someone lost their job or position of leadership because of wrongdoing, then forgiveness means they must be restored to their former position.




10. forgive to be forgiven

10: People must forgive others in order to obtain God’s forgiveness.


10: People must forgive others in order to obtain God’s forgiveness.




11. trust

11: If you forgive someone it means you start trusting them again.


11: If you forgive someone it means you start trusting them again.Non-Christian CollegeAgree 13.6 ; Disagree 61.3



12. too forgiving?

12: If you are too free with forgiveness, you will encourage people to keep hurting others.


12: If you are too free with forgiveness, you will encourage people to keep hurting others.Non-Christian CollegeAgree 36.4 ; Disagree 40.9



13. anger

13: When you truly forgive people, you are no longer angry with them for what they did.


13. When you truly forgive people, you are no longer angry with them for what they did.

Non-Christian CollegeAgree 59.1 ; Disagree 25



14. avoidance

14: If you truly forgive people, you stop avoiding them when you see them.


14: If you truly forgive people, you stop avoiding them when you see them.


Christian College Agree 53; Disagree 17.5


Discussion

• Apology as necessary

Clearly divided: 71% non-Christian vs. 16% Christian.

• Guilty feelings

A Christian college thing 73% vs. 55%.


Discussion

• Repentance (admit and change)

Most believe this is not needed to forgive. But about one in three expect you to change.

• Restoration

Have they had enough? No need to restore a fallen leader to the same position.


Discussion

• God’s forgiveness as contingent

Most believe you must forgive to get God’s forgiveness.

• Trust

Most believe you do not have to trust just because you forgive.


Discussion

• How many times should you forgive?

Some disagreement on being too forgiving but a substantial minority believe it is possible to be too forgiving.


Discussion

Anger & Avoidance

Two concepts that forgiveness researchers believe you need to reduce as evidence of forgiveness.

Most of our participants agree.


Discussion

Forgiveness and Reconciliation- our key focus

Our results reflected beliefs similar to those identified by Kanz (2000). A majority of participants in both studies agreed that reconciliation is a necessary part of forgiveness.


Discussion

Much of the research concerning forgiveness has maintained that there is a distinct difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. Our research, along with Kanz (2000), indicates otherwise; participants see the two processes as intertwined.


Discussion

These forgiveness and reconciliation findings are important for both researchers and practitioners because they dramatically affect how we examine the issue both in study and in therapy.

If psychotherapists follow the teaching of the leading researchers, they will be out of touch with the belief system of some clients.


Discussion

The integration of Christianity and Psychology is an issue here.

Psychological approaches emphasize the intrapersonal aspect of forgiveness.

Christian teaching focuses on forgiving in the context of reconciliation in a faith community.

Christian participants appear to accept the latter as normative.


Questions & Comments

What We Believe:

Forgiveness and ReconciliationJaimée Allman & Geoffrey Sutton

Evangel University

Email for copies [email protected]

More on forgiveness on website http://www.evangel.edu/Directory/Bios/Index.asp?username=SuttonG


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Documents

What We Believe: Forgiveness and Reconciliation