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IAE – Writing a Descriptive Paragraph – Week 4 + 5 – The Hanging Gardens of Babylon: Writing a Paragraph Part 2
Paragraph
The main body 1 paragraph below has been written from the example notes and outline we looked at in part 1. Complete the tasks below the paragraph to help you understand the features of this paragraph.
Ziggurats were very large buildings that played an important part in ancient
Mesopotamian culture. These buildings were religious symbols, which could be
seen from all over the city. Professor Ali of Baghdad University claims that the
citizens of the cities were proud of these structures (Osman, 2011). In modern
Iraq archaeologists have discovered 19 ziggurats in 16 cities spread over a large
area (Osman, 2011). These religious towers of the Babylonians were tall terraced
pyramid structures, which usually contained a variety of plants. The temples at
the top of the pyramid were dedicated to local gods (Osman 2011). The center of
the ziggurat was made of mud brick and the outer walls of baked brick. There
were no walls inside, and an external staircase led to the top of the building.
Usually ziggurats had the same dimensions of 40x50m at the base and were about
50m high (Ali, 1997).
Features of an academic paragraph
1. Identify the topic sentence. Underline the topic and put the control in bold. Is this a
general or specific topic sentence?
2. Annotate the structure of the paragraph (i.e. general explanations and the specific
examples).
3. Highlight the citations in the paragraph. Why has the writer used these citations in
these places?
4. Highlight the key word and any reference words for the key word.
5. This paragraph is describing something. What complex sentence type do we often
use when describing a thing? Can you find 3 examples of this sentence type?
IAE John Slocombe GE: UAEU 1
IAE – Writing a Descriptive Paragraph – Week 4 + 5 – The Hanging Gardens of Babylon: Writing a Paragraph Part 2
Paragraph: Main Body 2 – Draft 1
Use the outline that you wrote in part1 to write your draft paragraph for main body 2. Write between 100-150 words
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Now use the Editing Checklist below to review and edit your paragraph. Then you are ready
to write the final draft of main body 2.
IAE John Slocombe GE: UAEU 2
IAE – Writing a Descriptive Paragraph – Week 4 + 5 – The Hanging Gardens of Babylon: Writing a Paragraph Part 2
Editing Checklist
Before you begin the editing skim read your draft paragraph. You should always read your written work before anybody else does.
Now your teacher will guide you through the following checklist. On the checklist circle Y, N or ? (yes, no, not sure) for each of the editing question in the box below. On your draft essay annotate or highlight any of the changes that you need to make for the final draft.
Organization, Content and Language
1. Have you written a topic sentence with a topic and control? Underline and highlight them.
Y / N /?
2. Is the topic connected to the essay question? Is the control general or specific?
Y / N /?
3. Do your supporting sentences explain the main idea? Do the sentences give examples to prove the main idea?
Y / N /?
4. Are the ideas in your paragraph organized logically? Y / N /?
5. Highlight all your transitions words. Have you used these words with the correct meaning? Have you under used them or overused them.
Y / N /?
6. Have you paraphrased information from the source texts? Y / N /?
7. Does each clause have a verb and subject? Does each sentence have a verb and a subject? Are the sentences simple, compound or complex? Do the sentences and clauses have the correct punctuation?
Y / N /?
8. Have you used reference words for the key word Hanging Gardens of Babylon? Highlight the key words and reference words?
Y / N /?
9. Check for any particular language problems that you often have. For example, active and passive verb forms, or verb tenses or subject verb agreement.
Y / N /?
IAE John Slocombe GE: UAEU 3
IAE – Writing a Descriptive Paragraph – Week 4 + 5 – The Hanging Gardens of Babylon: Writing a Paragraph Part 2
Citations
1. Have you used citations for; data and statistics, information from research and expert opinions?
Y / N /?
2. Have you used the correct format for the citations? Y / N /?
Presentation
1. Is your essay written on A4 lined paper? Y / N /?
2. Is there a clear straight margin on the left hand side? Y / N /?
3. Have you written your name, ID and section in the top left hand corner? Y / N /?
4. Have you double-spaced (left a free line) for teacher comments? Y / N /?
Now that you have finished your annotating you can now make the changes necessary to the draft. Then you are ready to write a final draft paragraph for main body 2. An edited final draft is much more likely to get a higher grade!
You can use the steps in this writing process when completing many of your writing assignments in your faculty courses.
IAE John Slocombe GE: UAEU 4
IAE – Writing a Descriptive Paragraph – Week 4 + 5 – The Hanging Gardens of Babylon: Writing a Paragraph Part 2
Paragraph: Main Body 2 – Final Draft
Write your final draft paragraph for main body 2. Write between 100-150 words
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IAE John Slocombe GE: UAEU 5
