Voice Lessons: Detail AP Language and Composition

Voice Lessons: DetailVoice Lessons: Detail

AP Language and AP Language and CompositionComposition

Detail-1Detail-1• Consider:Consider:

• ““Whenever he was so fortunate as to have near him a Whenever he was so fortunate as to have near him a hare that had been kept too long, or a meat pie made hare that had been kept too long, or a meat pie made with rancid butter, he gorged himself with such violence with rancid butter, he gorged himself with such violence that his veins swelled, and the moisture broke out on his that his veins swelled, and the moisture broke out on his forehead.” forehead.” Thomas Macaulay, “Samuel Johnson”Thomas Macaulay, “Samuel Johnson”

• Analysis:Analysis:• What effect does the detail (the What effect does the detail (the spoiled harespoiled hare, the , the rancid rancid

butterbutter, the , the swollen veinsswollen veins, the , the sweaty foreheadsweaty forehead) have on ) have on the reader?the reader?

• How would the meaning of the sentence be changed by How would the meaning of the sentence be changed by ending it after ending it after himselfhimself??

• Apply :Apply :• Write a sentence describing someone with disgusting Write a sentence describing someone with disgusting

eating habits. It must be one, correct sentence; and it eating habits. It must be one, correct sentence; and it must contain at least three vivid details.must contain at least three vivid details.


• ““Whenever he was so fortunate as to have near him a Whenever he was so fortunate as to have near him a hare that had been kept too long, or a meat pie made hare that had been kept too long, or a meat pie made with rancid butter, he gorged himself with such violence with rancid butter, he gorged himself with such violence that his veins swelled, and the moisture broke out on his that his veins swelled, and the moisture broke out on his forehead.” forehead.” Thomas Macaulay, “Samuel Johnson”Thomas Macaulay, “Samuel Johnson”

• Analysis:Analysis:• The spoiled hare and the rancid butter add specificity to The spoiled hare and the rancid butter add specificity to

the general idea that Johnson will eat anything. The the general idea that Johnson will eat anything. The other details create a precise, and rather violent, picture other details create a precise, and rather violent, picture of Johnson’s disgusting eating habits. They set up a of Johnson’s disgusting eating habits. They set up a contrast between his personal habits and his prodigious contrast between his personal habits and his prodigious mind and accomplishments.mind and accomplishments.

• It takes away the sentence’s power to bring the reader It takes away the sentence’s power to bring the reader into the scene. It reduces the reader’s involvement and into the scene. It reduces the reader’s involvement and lessens the power to shape the reader’s attitude toward lessens the power to shape the reader’s attitude toward Johnson.Johnson.


• ““An old man, Don Tomasito, the baker, played the tuba. An old man, Don Tomasito, the baker, played the tuba. When he blew into the huge mouthpiece, his face would When he blew into the huge mouthpiece, his face would turn purple and his thousand wrinkles would disappear as turn purple and his thousand wrinkles would disappear as his skin filled out” his skin filled out” Alberto Alvaro Rios, “The Iguana Killer”Alberto Alvaro Rios, “The Iguana Killer”

• Analysis:Analysis:• The first sentence is a general statement. How does the The first sentence is a general statement. How does the

second sentence enrich and intensify the first?second sentence enrich and intensify the first?• Contrast the second sentence with the following:Contrast the second sentence with the following:

• When he blew the tuba, his face turned purple and cheeks When he blew the tuba, his face turned purple and cheeks puffed outpuffed out

• Which sentence more effectively expresses an attitude Which sentence more effectively expresses an attitude toward Tomasito? What is that attitude and how is it toward Tomasito? What is that attitude and how is it communicated?communicated?

• Apply :Apply :• Describe someone jumping over a puddle. Your first Describe someone jumping over a puddle. Your first

sentence should be general, stating the action simply. sentence should be general, stating the action simply. Your second sentence should clarify and intensify the Your second sentence should clarify and intensify the action through detail.action through detail.


• ““An old man, Don Tomasito, the baker, played the tuba. An old man, Don Tomasito, the baker, played the tuba. When he blew into the huge mouthpiece, his face would When he blew into the huge mouthpiece, his face would turn purple and his thousand wrinkles would disappear turn purple and his thousand wrinkles would disappear as his skin filled out” as his skin filled out” Alberto Alvaro Rios, “The Iguana Killer”Alberto Alvaro Rios, “The Iguana Killer”

• Analysis:Analysis:• How does the second sentence enrich and intensify the How does the second sentence enrich and intensify the

first? It brings the scene into sharp focus. By describing first? It brings the scene into sharp focus. By describing the specific details of his face, the author communicates the specific details of his face, the author communicates the intensity of the effort; and the reader can almost the intensity of the effort; and the reader can almost hear the sound of the tuba.hear the sound of the tuba.

• Contrast the second sentence with the following:Contrast the second sentence with the following:• Which sentence more effectively expresses an attitude Which sentence more effectively expresses an attitude

toward Tomasito? What is that attitude and how is it toward Tomasito? What is that attitude and how is it communicated? Rio’s sentence more effectively communicated? Rio’s sentence more effectively communicates an attitude toward Tomasito. The attitude is communicates an attitude toward Tomasito. The attitude is one of admiration. Tomasito is an old man. Nevertheless, one of admiration. Tomasito is an old man. Nevertheless, he blows into a huge mouthpiece, suggesting his power. he blows into a huge mouthpiece, suggesting his power. Further, his wrinkles disappear as he blows into the Further, his wrinkles disappear as he blows into the trumpet, a return to youthful vigor.trumpet, a return to youthful vigor.


• Charley (to Willy): Why must everybody look like you? Who Charley (to Willy): Why must everybody look like you? Who liked J.P. Morgan? Was he impressive? In a Turkish bath he’d liked J.P. Morgan? Was he impressive? In a Turkish bath he’d look like a butcher. But with his pockets on he was well look like a butcher. But with his pockets on he was well liked. Now listen, Willy, I know you don’t like me, and liked. Now listen, Willy, I know you don’t like me, and nobody can say I’m in love with you, but I’ll give you a job nobody can say I’m in love with you, but I’ll give you a job because-just for the hell of it, put it that way. Now what do because-just for the hell of it, put it that way. Now what do you say? you say? Arthur Miller, Arthur Miller, Death of a SalesmanDeath of a Salesman

• Analysis:Analysis:• Who was J.P. Morgan? What is a Turkish bath? What picture Who was J.P. Morgan? What is a Turkish bath? What picture

comes to mind when someone is said to look like a butcher? comes to mind when someone is said to look like a butcher? How do these details contribute to the point Charley is How do these details contribute to the point Charley is trying to make?trying to make?

• How would the passage be different if Charley said J.P. How would the passage be different if Charley said J.P. Morgan would look like a Morgan would look like a bakerbaker in a Turkish bath? in a Turkish bath?

• Apply :Apply :• Think of someone famous and powerful. Use detail to create Think of someone famous and powerful. Use detail to create

an unflattering but accurate description of the physical an unflattering but accurate description of the physical appearance of this famous person. Model your description appearance of this famous person. Model your description on Miller’s description of J.P. Morgan.on Miller’s description of J.P. Morgan.

Detail-3Detail-3• Analysis:Analysis:

• Morgan was an U.S. businessman, financier, and steel Morgan was an U.S. businessman, financier, and steel industrialist. He co-founded the U.S. Steel Corporation in 1901 . industrialist. He co-founded the U.S. Steel Corporation in 1901 . He is mentioned here because of his wealth and influence. A He is mentioned here because of his wealth and influence. A Turkish bath is a public bath in which the bather passes through Turkish bath is a public bath in which the bather passes through a series of steam rooms increasing temperature and then a series of steam rooms increasing temperature and then receives a rubdown, massage, and cold shower. A butcher is receives a rubdown, massage, and cold shower. A butcher is usually pictured as someone large, strong, and sometimes usually pictured as someone large, strong, and sometimes overweight. The stereotype contrasts with the refined image of overweight. The stereotype contrasts with the refined image of someone of great wealth and sophistication, like Morgan. someone of great wealth and sophistication, like Morgan. Morgan was rich and influential, yet he won no beauty or Morgan was rich and influential, yet he won no beauty or popularity contest. The details illustrate and exemplify the point popularity contest. The details illustrate and exemplify the point that it isn’t necessary for everyone to like Willy or for Willy to be that it isn’t necessary for everyone to like Willy or for Willy to be impressive.impressive.

• A baker is usually pictured as somewhat overweight; but being a A baker is usually pictured as somewhat overweight; but being a baker does not carry the connotation of brute force, of bone-baker does not carry the connotation of brute force, of bone-cracking strength. Further, a baker does not work with raw meat cracking strength. Further, a baker does not work with raw meat and blood, aspects of a butcher’s job that make him seem more and blood, aspects of a butcher’s job that make him seem more coarse, less refined. A baker is more “earthy.” He creates while coarse, less refined. A baker is more “earthy.” He creates while a butcher dismembers. If Morgan looked like a baker, the a butcher dismembers. If Morgan looked like a baker, the passage would be softened and Charley would have a weaker passage would be softened and Charley would have a weaker argument.argument.


• To those who saw him often he seemed almost like two To those who saw him often he seemed almost like two men: one the merry monarch of the hunt and banquet men: one the merry monarch of the hunt and banquet and procession, the friend of children, the patron of and procession, the friend of children, the patron of every kind of sport; the other the cold, acute observer of every kind of sport; the other the cold, acute observer of the audience chamber or the Council, watching the audience chamber or the Council, watching vigilantly, weighing arguments, refusing except under vigilantly, weighing arguments, refusing except under the stress of great events to speak his own mind. the stress of great events to speak his own mind. Winston Winston Churchill, “King Henry VIII, Churchill, “King Henry VIII, Churchill’s History of the English –Speaking PeoplesChurchill’s History of the English –Speaking Peoples

• Analysis:Analysis:• Churchill draws attention to the contrasting sides of Churchill draws attention to the contrasting sides of

Henry VIIi through detail. How is the impact of this Henry VIIi through detail. How is the impact of this sentence strengthened by the sentence strengthened by the orderorder of the details’ of the details’ presentation?presentation?

• What is Churchill’s attitude toward Henry? What specific What is Churchill’s attitude toward Henry? What specific details reveal this attitude?details reveal this attitude?

• Apply :Apply :• Think of someone you know who has two strong sides to Think of someone you know who has two strong sides to

his/her personality. Using Churchill’s sentence as a his/her personality. Using Churchill’s sentence as a model, write a sentence which captures-through detail-model, write a sentence which captures-through detail-these two sides. Share your sentence with a partner.these two sides. Share your sentence with a partner.


• The lighthearted side of Henry is presented with detail The lighthearted side of Henry is presented with detail revealing a decreasing absorption with his responsibilities. revealing a decreasing absorption with his responsibilities. First, he is a monarch, if a merry one. Next, he is a friend of First, he is a monarch, if a merry one. Next, he is a friend of children, details which give him a softness but keep a children, details which give him a softness but keep a connection to his responsibilities. Finally, he is a patron of connection to his responsibilities. Finally, he is a patron of sports, which shows him to be a fun-loving man, totally sports, which shows him to be a fun-loving man, totally detached at times from his responsibilities. Henry’s other side detached at times from his responsibilities. Henry’s other side is presented in an order of decreasing importance. He is first is presented in an order of decreasing importance. He is first an observer, which is both passive and detached. He then an observer, which is both passive and detached. He then watches vigilantly and weighs arguments, acts which are more watches vigilantly and weighs arguments, acts which are more active and controlling. Finally, he refuses to speak, which is active and controlling. Finally, he refuses to speak, which is almost violent in its effect. The verbs and their accompanying almost violent in its effect. The verbs and their accompanying detail are increasingly active and aggressive. The order of detail are increasingly active and aggressive. The order of details thus intensifies the description of Henry and gives it details thus intensifies the description of Henry and gives it focus.focus.

• Churchill’s attitude is detached and fair. He presents the two Churchill’s attitude is detached and fair. He presents the two sides of Henry’s personality in clauses which contain detail of sides of Henry’s personality in clauses which contain detail of equal weight. The merry monarch is balanced with the cold, equal weight. The merry monarch is balanced with the cold, acute observer; the friend of children is balanced with watcher acute observer; the friend of children is balanced with watcher and weigher; the patron of sport is balanced with the refuser. and weigher; the patron of sport is balanced with the refuser. This balance of detail allows the reader to reserve judgment This balance of detail allows the reader to reserve judgment and stay open to further character development.and stay open to further character development.


• The truck lurched down the goat path, over the The truck lurched down the goat path, over the bridge and swung south toward EL Puerto. I bridge and swung south toward EL Puerto. I watched carefully all that we left behind. We watched carefully all that we left behind. We passed Rosie’s house and at the clothesline right passed Rosie’s house and at the clothesline right at the edge of the cliff there was a young girl at the edge of the cliff there was a young girl hanging out brightly colored garments. She was hanging out brightly colored garments. She was soon lost in the furrow of dust the truck raised. soon lost in the furrow of dust the truck raised. Rudolfo Anaya, Rudolfo Anaya, Bless Me, UltimaBless Me, Ultima

• Analysis:Analysis:• Write down the words that provide specific detail Write down the words that provide specific detail

and contribute to the power of the passage.and contribute to the power of the passage.• Contrast the third sentence with:Contrast the third sentence with:

• We passed Rosie’s house and saw a girl hanging out We passed Rosie’s house and saw a girl hanging out the clothes.the clothes.

• Explain the difference in impact.Explain the difference in impact.

• Apply :Apply :• Rewrite the passage eliminating the specific Rewrite the passage eliminating the specific

detail. How does the elimination of detail change detail. How does the elimination of detail change the meaning of the passage?the meaning of the passage?


• The truck lurched down the goat path, over the The truck lurched down the goat path, over the bridge and swung south toward EL Puerto. I bridge and swung south toward EL Puerto. I watched carefully all that we left behind. We watched carefully all that we left behind. We passed Rosie’s house and at the clothesline right at passed Rosie’s house and at the clothesline right at the edge of the cliff there was a young girl hanging the edge of the cliff there was a young girl hanging out brightly colored garments. She was soon lost in out brightly colored garments. She was soon lost in the furrow of dust the truck raised. the furrow of dust the truck raised. Rudolfo Anaya, Rudolfo Anaya, Bless Me, Bless Me, UltimaUltima

• Analysis:Analysis:• Words that provide specific detail: goat path, the Words that provide specific detail: goat path, the

edge of the cliff, brightly colored garments, and the edge of the cliff, brightly colored garments, and the furrow of dust.furrow of dust.

• Contrast the third sentence with:Contrast the third sentence with:• We passed Rosie’s house and saw a girl hanging out We passed Rosie’s house and saw a girl hanging out

the clothes.the clothes.• Anaya’s sentence is specific and concrete; it allows the Anaya’s sentence is specific and concrete; it allows the

reader to participate in this particular experience. The reader to participate in this particular experience. The clothesline is at the edge of the cliff; the girl is young; clothesline is at the edge of the cliff; the girl is young; the clothes are brightly colored garments; and the the clothes are brightly colored garments; and the bright colors are in sharp contrast to the dust of the bright colors are in sharp contrast to the dust of the next sentence. This detail brings the setting into focus next sentence. This detail brings the setting into focus and prepares the reader to join the actionand prepares the reader to join the action


• He went on till he came to the first milestone, which He went on till he came to the first milestone, which stood in the bank, half-way up a steep hill. He stood in the bank, half-way up a steep hill. He rested his basket on the top of the stone, placed his rested his basket on the top of the stone, placed his elbows on it, and gave way to a convulsive twitch, elbows on it, and gave way to a convulsive twitch, which was worse than a sob, because it was so hard which was worse than a sob, because it was so hard and so dry. and so dry. Thomas HardyThomas Hardy, The Mayor of Casterbridge, The Mayor of Casterbridge

• Analysis:Analysis:• How do the details in this passage prepare you for How do the details in this passage prepare you for

the the convulsive twitchconvulsive twitch at the end of the passage? at the end of the passage?• This passage does not describe the character’s face This passage does not describe the character’s face

at all. What effect does this lack of detail have on at all. What effect does this lack of detail have on the reader?the reader?

• Apply :Apply :• Plan a pantomime of the scene described in this Plan a pantomime of the scene described in this

passage and perform it for the class (extra credit). passage and perform it for the class (extra credit). After several people have performed, discuss the After several people have performed, discuss the facial expressions used. Discuss similarities and facial expressions used. Discuss similarities and differences.differences.


• The detail of this passage suggest a long, tiring The detail of this passage suggest a long, tiring journey. He stops at the first milestone, which journey. He stops at the first milestone, which suggests there will be more. The milestone is half-way suggests there will be more. The milestone is half-way up a steep hill, which suggests he has a long way to up a steep hill, which suggests he has a long way to go, and the going will be difficult. He has to rest, go, and the going will be difficult. He has to rest, which again suggests a difficult journey; and he rests which again suggests a difficult journey; and he rests in a stooped position, which suggests dejection. All of in a stooped position, which suggests dejection. All of these details work together to create a picture of these details work together to create a picture of weariness and misery, which culminates in the weariness and misery, which culminates in the convulsive twitch at the end of the sentence.convulsive twitch at the end of the sentence.

• The lack of detail about the character’s face states by The lack of detail about the character’s face states by understatement. The lack of detail is in sharp contrast understatement. The lack of detail is in sharp contrast to the intensity of the character’s melancholy. The to the intensity of the character’s melancholy. The focus is on the character’s convulsive twitch, his focus is on the character’s convulsive twitch, his internal pain, his utter dejection. Elaborate internal pain, his utter dejection. Elaborate description would turn this pure pain into description would turn this pure pain into sentimentality. The lack of detail about the sentimentality. The lack of detail about the character’s face thus makes the description of the character’s face thus makes the description of the character’s pain sharper and more meaningful.character’s pain sharper and more meaningful.


• The dog stood up and growled like a lion, stiff-standing The dog stood up and growled like a lion, stiff-standing hackles, teeth uncovered as he lashed up his fury for hackles, teeth uncovered as he lashed up his fury for the charge. Tea Cake split the water like an otter, the charge. Tea Cake split the water like an otter, opening his knife as he dived. The dog raced down the opening his knife as he dived. The dog raced down the back-bone of the cow to the attack and Janie screamed back-bone of the cow to the attack and Janie screamed and slipped far back on the tail of the cow, just out of and slipped far back on the tail of the cow, just out of reach of the dog’s angry jaws. reach of the dog’s angry jaws. Zora Neale HurstonZora Neale Hurston, Their Eyes Were , Their Eyes Were Watching GodWatching God

• Analysis:Analysis:• Which details reveal that the dog has rabies? What Which details reveal that the dog has rabies? What

effect do these details have on the reader?effect do these details have on the reader?• Contrast the details used to describe Tea Cake (the Contrast the details used to describe Tea Cake (the

male protagonist) and Janie (the female protagonist). male protagonist) and Janie (the female protagonist). What do these details reveal about the author’s attitude What do these details reveal about the author’s attitude toward these two characters?toward these two characters?

• Apply :Apply :• Think of two contrasting characters. Write a sentence Think of two contrasting characters. Write a sentence

for each showing their reaction to a fight. Do not for each showing their reaction to a fight. Do not explain the different reactions; instead, show the explain the different reactions; instead, show the different reactions through use of detail. different reactions through use of detail.


• The details that reveal the dog has rabies are the The details that reveal the dog has rabies are the dog’s “growling like a lion,” the “stiff-standing dog’s “growling like a lion,” the “stiff-standing hackles,” and “uncovered teeth,” the fury, the hackles,” and “uncovered teeth,” the fury, the frantic run to attack Janie, and the “angry jaws.” frantic run to attack Janie, and the “angry jaws.” These details recreate the terror of the scene and These details recreate the terror of the scene and make the reader a full participant in the actionmake the reader a full participant in the action

• The details used to describe Tea cake show him to The details used to describe Tea cake show him to be active and in control: He splits the water, be active and in control: He splits the water, opens his knife, and dives. Janie, on the other opens his knife, and dives. Janie, on the other hand, is described with details that are passive hand, is described with details that are passive and helpless: She screams and slips out of reach. and helpless: She screams and slips out of reach. These details reveal a traditional attitude toward These details reveal a traditional attitude toward men, women, and these two characters: men men, women, and these two characters: men (specifically, Tea Cake) are proactive, purposeful, (specifically, Tea Cake) are proactive, purposeful, and protective; women (specifically, Janie) are and protective; women (specifically, Janie) are reactive, passive, and protected.reactive, passive, and protected.

Detail-8 (AKA Mrs. Spriggs’ Detail-8 (AKA Mrs. Spriggs’ least Favorite Voice Lesson)least Favorite Voice Lesson)• Consider:Consider:

• MRS. VENABLE: …and the sand all alive, all alive, as the MRS. VENABLE: …and the sand all alive, all alive, as the hatched sea-turtles made their dash for the sea, while hatched sea-turtles made their dash for the sea, while the birds hovered and swooped to attack and hovered the birds hovered and swooped to attack and hovered and –swooped to attack! They were diving down on the and –swooped to attack! They were diving down on the hatched sea-turtles, turning them over to expose their hatched sea-turtles, turning them over to expose their soft undersides, tearing the undersides open and soft undersides, tearing the undersides open and rending and eating their flesh. rending and eating their flesh. Tennessee WilliamsTennessee Williams, Suddenly Last , Suddenly Last SummerSummer

• Analysis:Analysis:• Williams uses the repetition of detail in three places in Williams uses the repetition of detail in three places in

this passage. What are the three places? Does the this passage. What are the three places? Does the repetition enhance or detract from the overall effect of repetition enhance or detract from the overall effect of the passage?the passage?

• What is Mrs. Venable’s attitude toward the scene she What is Mrs. Venable’s attitude toward the scene she describes? Which specific details reveal this attitude?describes? Which specific details reveal this attitude?

• Apply :Apply :• Write a detailed description of a sporting event. Write a detailed description of a sporting event.

Emphasize some violent or extreme action by repeating Emphasize some violent or extreme action by repeating at least two vivid details. Try to create a feeling of at least two vivid details. Try to create a feeling of revulsion.revulsion.

Detail-8 (AKA Mrs. Spriggs’ Detail-8 (AKA Mrs. Spriggs’ least Favorite Voice Lesson)least Favorite Voice Lesson)• Analysis:Analysis:

• Details such as alive, all alive, birds hovered and Details such as alive, all alive, birds hovered and swooped to attack, and hovered and swooped to swooped to attack, and hovered and swooped to attack. The repetition of detail enhances the effect of attack. The repetition of detail enhances the effect of the passage by emphasizing the scope and power of the passage by emphasizing the scope and power of the scene: the swarm of the sea-turtles, the ferocity the scene: the swarm of the sea-turtles, the ferocity of the bird’s attack, the relentless of the feeding of the bird’s attack, the relentless of the feeding frenzy. Together the details build and reinforce the frenzy. Together the details build and reinforce the speaker’s revulsion at the violence of the actionspeaker’s revulsion at the violence of the action

• Her attitude is one of horror and revulsion. The Her attitude is one of horror and revulsion. The repetition of all alive creates a feeling of swarming repetition of all alive creates a feeling of swarming lower life forms. The birds’ attack is relentless and lower life forms. The birds’ attack is relentless and fierce; there is no soaring grace here. The birds are fierce; there is no soaring grace here. The birds are predatory and single-minded. But the most revealing predatory and single-minded. But the most revealing details are at the end of the passage. The hatchlings details are at the end of the passage. The hatchlings have soft undersides, which creates a feeling of have soft undersides, which creates a feeling of vulnerability and defenselessness. The birds expose vulnerability and defenselessness. The birds expose the hatchlings’ undersides, tearing and eating their the hatchlings’ undersides, tearing and eating their flesh. This juxtaposition of the vulnerable and violent flesh. This juxtaposition of the vulnerable and violent creates a mood of horror and reveals Mrs. Venable’s creates a mood of horror and reveals Mrs. Venable’s revulsion.revulsion.


• If my mother was in a singing mood, it wasn’t so bad. If my mother was in a singing mood, it wasn’t so bad. She would sing about hard times, bad times, and She would sing about hard times, bad times, and somebody-done-gone-and-left-me times. But her voice somebody-done-gone-and-left-me times. But her voice was so sweet and her singing-eyes so melty I found was so sweet and her singing-eyes so melty I found myself longing for those hard times, yearning to be myself longing for those hard times, yearning to be grown without “a thin di-I-ime to my name.” I looked grown without “a thin di-I-ime to my name.” I looked forward to the delicious time when “my man” would forward to the delicious time when “my man” would leave me, when I would “hate to see that evening sun leave me, when I would “hate to see that evening sun go down…” cause then I would know “my man has left go down…” cause then I would know “my man has left this town.” Misery colored by the greens and blues in this town.” Misery colored by the greens and blues in my mother’s voice took all of the grief out of the words my mother’s voice took all of the grief out of the words and left me with a conviction that paint was not only and left me with a conviction that paint was not only endurable, it was sweet. endurable, it was sweet. Toni MorrisonToni Morrison, The Bluest Eye, The Bluest Eye

• Analysis:Analysis:• Why are parts of the passage in quotes? What do the Why are parts of the passage in quotes? What do the

quoted details add to the passage?quoted details add to the passage?• Which details in the passage contribute to the Which details in the passage contribute to the

conclusion that pain is sweet? How does this create an conclusion that pain is sweet? How does this create an oxymoron?oxymoron?

• Apply :Apply :• Think of a paradoxical feeling such as sweet pain, Think of a paradoxical feeling such as sweet pain,

healthful illness, or frightening comfort; make a chart healthful illness, or frightening comfort; make a chart listing two details for each side of the paradox.listing two details for each side of the paradox.


• The quoted lines are from songs, specifically, The quoted lines are from songs, specifically, blues. The quoted lines add the specificity blues. The quoted lines add the specificity needed to involve the reader in the scene. The needed to involve the reader in the scene. The reader becomes an active listener and can then reader becomes an active listener and can then understand the sweet pain of the mother’s song.understand the sweet pain of the mother’s song.

• The details that set up the sweet pain oxymoron The details that set up the sweet pain oxymoron are those that contrast the pain of the song’s are those that contrast the pain of the song’s lyrics with the sweetness of the mother’s singing, lyrics with the sweetness of the mother’s singing, specifically:specifically:

• Sweet Details-her voice was so sweet, here eyes Sweet Details-her voice was so sweet, here eyes were so melty, delicious time, the greens and were so melty, delicious time, the greens and blues in my mother’s voice took all of the grief out blues in my mother’s voice took all of the grief out of the wordsof the words

• Pain Details-hard times, bad times, somebody-Pain Details-hard times, bad times, somebody-done-gone-and-left-me times, “my man has left done-gone-and-left-me times, “my man has left this town,” etc.this town,” etc.


• About suffering they were never wrong,About suffering they were never wrong,The Old Masters: how well they understoodThe Old Masters: how well they understoodIts human position; how it takes placeIts human position; how it takes placeWhile someone else is eating or opening a window or While someone else is eating or opening a window or

just walking dully along; W. H. Auden, “Musee des just walking dully along; W. H. Auden, “Musee des Beaux Arts”Beaux Arts”

• Analysis:Analysis:• ““Suffering” is a general term. What is a general Suffering” is a general term. What is a general

term that sums up the detail in line 4?term that sums up the detail in line 4?• Compare line 4 with the following:Compare line 4 with the following:

• While someone else is not sufferingWhile someone else is not suffering• Why is Auden’s line more effective?Why is Auden’s line more effective?

• Apply :Apply :• Substitute “laziness” for “suffering” and rewrite Substitute “laziness” for “suffering” and rewrite

the following line.the following line.• While someone else is ___________________ or While someone else is ___________________ or

_______________________ or ______________________._______________________ or ______________________.


• Correct terms include such terms as apathy, Correct terms include such terms as apathy, inattention, disregard, heedlessness, inattention, disregard, heedlessness, insensitivity, impassivity, unconcern, insensitivity, impassivity, unconcern, nonchalance, callousness, or indifferencenonchalance, callousness, or indifference

• Auden’s line makes the impassivity of the fourth Auden’s line makes the impassivity of the fourth line concrete, particular, and unmistakable. line concrete, particular, and unmistakable. Detail gives form to the abstraction. By focusing Detail gives form to the abstraction. By focusing the reader’s attention on impassive actions, the reader’s attention on impassive actions, Auden connects the abstraction to the reader’s Auden connects the abstraction to the reader’s life, to actions he/she participates in and life, to actions he/she participates in and understands.understands.


• Under the hard, tough cloak of the struggle for Under the hard, tough cloak of the struggle for existence in which money and enormous white existence in which money and enormous white refrigerators and shining, massive, brutally-fast cars refrigerators and shining, massive, brutally-fast cars and fine, expensive clothing had ostensibly and fine, expensive clothing had ostensibly overwhelmed the qualities of men that were good and overwhelmed the qualities of men that were good and gentle and just, there still beat a heart of kindness gentle and just, there still beat a heart of kindness and patience and forgiveness. and patience and forgiveness. John OkadaJohn Okada, No-No Boy, No-No Boy

• Analysis:Analysis:• What does Okada’s choice of detail reveal about his What does Okada’s choice of detail reveal about his

attitude toward money?attitude toward money?• How would the elimination of “and enormous white How would the elimination of “and enormous white

refrigerators and shining, massive, brutally-fast cars refrigerators and shining, massive, brutally-fast cars and fine, expensive clothing modify the meaning and and fine, expensive clothing modify the meaning and effectiveness of the sentence? What money details effectiveness of the sentence? What money details were listed? What people details were listed? were listed? What people details were listed?

• Apply :Apply :• Choose a general noun then list three concrete noun Choose a general noun then list three concrete noun

phrases that reflect your opinion of the general noun. phrases that reflect your opinion of the general noun. For example, Okada uses “money” as a general For example, Okada uses “money” as a general noun. He then expresses his opinion of money with noun. He then expresses his opinion of money with detailed noun phrasesdetailed noun phrases


• Okada chooses details that show the powerful Okada chooses details that show the powerful seduction of money as an end and as a means to seduction of money as an end and as a means to buy things. He balances this with the constant buy things. He balances this with the constant and immutable kindness of people. His selection and immutable kindness of people. His selection of detail reveals the attitude that money is of detail reveals the attitude that money is seductive but cannot totally defeat the people’s seductive but cannot totally defeat the people’s basic goodness.basic goodness.

• Elimination of the details would reduce the power Elimination of the details would reduce the power of the passage and distance the reader from the of the passage and distance the reader from the action.action.

• Money Details-enormous white refrigerators, Money Details-enormous white refrigerators, shining, massive, brutally fast cars, fine, shining, massive, brutally fast cars, fine, expensive clothingexpensive clothing

• People Details-heart of kindness and patience and People Details-heart of kindness and patience and forgivenessforgiveness


• I rounded the hut and saw a man’s dead body sprawling in I rounded the hut and saw a man’s dead body sprawling in the mud. He was an Indian, a black Dravidian coolie the mud. He was an Indian, a black Dravidian coolie almost naked, and he could not have been dead many almost naked, and he could not have been dead many minutes. The people said that the elephant had come minutes. The people said that the elephant had come suddenly upon him round the corner of the hut, caught him suddenly upon him round the corner of the hut, caught him with its trunk, put its foot on his back and ground him into with its trunk, put its foot on his back and ground him into the earth. This was the rainy season and the ground was the earth. This was the rainy season and the ground was soft, and his face had scored a trench a foot deep and a soft, and his face had scored a trench a foot deep and a couple of yards long. He was lying on his belly with arms couple of yards long. He was lying on his belly with arms crucified and head sharply twisted to one side. His face crucified and head sharply twisted to one side. His face was coated with mud, the eyes wide open, the teeth bared was coated with mud, the eyes wide open, the teeth bared and grinning with an expression of unendurable agony. and grinning with an expression of unendurable agony. George Orwell “Shooting an Elephant”George Orwell “Shooting an Elephant”

• Analysis:Analysis:• What is the author’s attitude toward the coolie’s death? What is the author’s attitude toward the coolie’s death?

What details in the passage reveal this attitude?What details in the passage reveal this attitude?• Examine the last sentence of this paragraph. How would it Examine the last sentence of this paragraph. How would it

have affected the overall impact had Orwell written, his have affected the overall impact had Orwell written, his eyes wide open, his teeth bared and grinning?eyes wide open, his teeth bared and grinning?

• Apply :Apply :• Think of an event that you have personally witnessed Think of an event that you have personally witnessed

which horrified you. Your job is to describe that even and which horrified you. Your job is to describe that even and evoke horror. Do not state or explain that you were evoke horror. Do not state or explain that you were horrified. Use detail to describe the event and reveal your horrified. Use detail to describe the event and reveal your attitude.attitude.


• At first Orwell seems uninvolved, the objective At first Orwell seems uninvolved, the objective observer. He talks coolly about the dead body observer. He talks coolly about the dead body sprawled in the mud. He describes the man and the sprawled in the mud. He describes the man and the attack without emotion. Then the attitude shifts and attack without emotion. Then the attitude shifts and details begin to reveal horror at the scene: the details begin to reveal horror at the scene: the elephant ground him into the earth and his face scored elephant ground him into the earth and his face scored a trench a foot deep. The description of the crucified a trench a foot deep. The description of the crucified arms and the twisted head augments the horror and arms and the twisted head augments the horror and creates a feeling of a terrible sacrifice. The author’s creates a feeling of a terrible sacrifice. The author’s changing attitude-his increasing horror-culminates in changing attitude-his increasing horror-culminates in the final sentence , with its details about the agony in the final sentence , with its details about the agony in the victim’s face. Here the horror is unchecked and the victim’s face. Here the horror is unchecked and unfiltered by the journalist’s objectivity.unfiltered by the journalist’s objectivity.

• By using the definite article instead of the personal By using the definite article instead of the personal pronoun, Orwell depersonalizes the scene and makes pronoun, Orwell depersonalizes the scene and makes it bearable for the reader. The death has clearly it bearable for the reader. The death has clearly happened to someone removed from the narrator and, happened to someone removed from the narrator and, by transference, the reader. It also dehumanizes the by transference, the reader. It also dehumanizes the victim, taking away his humanity, turning him into an victim, taking away his humanity, turning him into an object. object.


• Until I returned to Cuba, I never realized how many Until I returned to Cuba, I never realized how many blues exist. The aquamarines near the shoreline, the blues exist. The aquamarines near the shoreline, the azures of deeper waters, the eggshell blues beneath azures of deeper waters, the eggshell blues beneath my grandmother’s eyes, the fragile indigos tracking my grandmother’s eyes, the fragile indigos tracking her hands. There’s a blue, too, in the curves of the her hands. There’s a blue, too, in the curves of the palms, and the edges of the words we speak, a blue palms, and the edges of the words we speak, a blue tinge to the sand and the seashells and the plump gulls tinge to the sand and the seashells and the plump gulls on the beach. The mole by Abuela’s mouth is also blue, on the beach. The mole by Abuela’s mouth is also blue, a vanishing blue. a vanishing blue. Christina Garcia Christina Garcia Dreaming in CubaDreaming in Cuba

• Analysis:Analysis:• The narrator details the blues of the landscape and the The narrator details the blues of the landscape and the

blues of her grandmother (Abuela). What connection is blues of her grandmother (Abuela). What connection is revealed by this juxtaposition of images?revealed by this juxtaposition of images?

• Why is the last blue in the passage a “vanishing blue”?Why is the last blue in the passage a “vanishing blue”?

• Apply :Apply :• Choose a color and describe a scene using at least Choose a color and describe a scene using at least

three varieties of that color. Try to mix details and three varieties of that color. Try to mix details and landscape and people.landscape and people.


• The narrator connects her grandmother (Abuela) The narrator connects her grandmother (Abuela) with Cuba. The connection reveals that Abuela is with Cuba. The connection reveals that Abuela is as much a part of Cuba as the water, the shores, as much a part of Cuba as the water, the shores, the palms, the sand, the seashells, and the gulls. the palms, the sand, the seashells, and the gulls. To the narrator, the experience of Cuba is To the narrator, the experience of Cuba is inseparable from the experience of her inseparable from the experience of her grandmother.grandmother.

• The last blue in the passage, the “vanishing blue” The last blue in the passage, the “vanishing blue” is the blue of the mole by Abuela’s mouth. As part is the blue of the mole by Abuela’s mouth. As part of her grandmother, who is old, the mole’s of her grandmother, who is old, the mole’s distinctive character is vanishing, fading. That distinctive character is vanishing, fading. That the mole is blue connects Abuela to other aspects the mole is blue connects Abuela to other aspects of Cuba, all described as tinged with blue. of Cuba, all described as tinged with blue. However, Abuela is aging, and her way of life is However, Abuela is aging, and her way of life is passing. Although Abuela is connected to Cuba, passing. Although Abuela is connected to Cuba, her life and the Cuba she represents are her life and the Cuba she represents are declining.declining.


• How fine it is to enter some old town, walled and How fine it is to enter some old town, walled and turreted, just at approach of nightfall, or to come to turreted, just at approach of nightfall, or to come to some straggling village, with the lights streaming some straggling village, with the lights streaming through the surrounding gloom; and then, after through the surrounding gloom; and then, after inquiring for the best entertainment that the place inquiring for the best entertainment that the place affords, to “take one’s ease at one’s inn”! affords, to “take one’s ease at one’s inn”! William Hazlitt William Hazlitt “On Going a Journey” “On Going a Journey”

• Analysis:Analysis:• What details support the generalization, “how fine it What details support the generalization, “how fine it

is”?is”?• What feelings are evoked by the details of the town What feelings are evoked by the details of the town

(old, walled, turreted)? How does this selection of (old, walled, turreted)? How does this selection of detail communicate Hazlitt’s attitude toward the detail communicate Hazlitt’s attitude toward the town?town?

• Apply :Apply :• Imagine going to a motel after a long day on the road. Imagine going to a motel after a long day on the road.

The motel is the only place to sleep in town, and the The motel is the only place to sleep in town, and the next town is 200 miles away. The motel is old and next town is 200 miles away. The motel is old and dirty; your room is shabby and dark. Write a dirty; your room is shabby and dark. Write a paragraph expressing your attitude toward the room.paragraph expressing your attitude toward the room.


• Details that support the generalization “how fine Details that support the generalization “how fine it is” include entering a “walled and turreted it is” include entering a “walled and turreted town, lights streaming through the surrounding town, lights streaming through the surrounding gloom, and the best entertainment that the place gloom, and the best entertainment that the place affords.” These details work together to create a affords.” These details work together to create a feeling of warmth and comfort after a hard day’s feeling of warmth and comfort after a hard day’s travel.travel.

• The details create a romantic picture of a quaint The details create a romantic picture of a quaint town from another era. That the town is walled town from another era. That the town is walled and turreted could create a feeling of foreboding and turreted could create a feeling of foreboding and fear, but these details are preceded by an and fear, but these details are preceded by an assertion of a “fine” experience, so the create assertion of a “fine” experience, so the create instead a feeling of welcoming protection. instead a feeling of welcoming protection. Hazlitt’s attitude is thus established: this town Hazlitt’s attitude is thus established: this town will welcome him with warmth, protection, and will welcome him with warmth, protection, and rest.rest.


• She was wearing her usual at-home vesture…It consisted She was wearing her usual at-home vesture…It consisted mostly of a hoary midnight-blue Japanese kimono. She mostly of a hoary midnight-blue Japanese kimono. She almost invariably wore it through the apartment during almost invariably wore it through the apartment during the day. With its many occultish-looking folds, it also the day. With its many occultish-looking folds, it also served as the repository for the paraphernalia of a very served as the repository for the paraphernalia of a very heavy cigarette smoker and an amateur handyman; two heavy cigarette smoker and an amateur handyman; two oversized pockets had been added at the hips, and they oversized pockets had been added at the hips, and they usually contained two or three packs of cigarettes, usually contained two or three packs of cigarettes, several match folders, a screwdriver, a claw-end several match folders, a screwdriver, a claw-end hammer, a Boy Scout knife that had once belonged to hammer, a Boy Scout knife that had once belonged to one of her sons, and an enamel faucet handle or two, one of her sons, and an enamel faucet handle or two, plus an assortment of screws, nails, hinges, and ball-plus an assortment of screws, nails, hinges, and ball-bearing casters-all of which tended to make Mrs. Glass bearing casters-all of which tended to make Mrs. Glass chink faintly as she moved about in her large apartment . chink faintly as she moved about in her large apartment . J.D. Salinger J.D. Salinger Franny and ZooeyFranny and Zooey

• Analysis:Analysis:• What does the detail in the passage reveal about Mrs. What does the detail in the passage reveal about Mrs.

Glass’ character? In other words, how does the detail Glass’ character? In other words, how does the detail give you a picture of her looks and insight into her give you a picture of her looks and insight into her character?character?

• How would the meaning of the fourth sentence be How would the meaning of the fourth sentence be different without the detail that follows the semicolon?different without the detail that follows the semicolon?

• Apply :Apply :• Sketch a picture of Mrs. GlassSketch a picture of Mrs. Glass


• Mrs. Glass’ clothing reveals several aspects of her Mrs. Glass’ clothing reveals several aspects of her personality. That she is wearing a Japanese kimono personality. That she is wearing a Japanese kimono (not the usual America at-home wear) with “occultish (not the usual America at-home wear) with “occultish looking folds” sets her up as odd, or at least, looking folds” sets her up as odd, or at least, unusual. Her clothes reveal her heavy smoking habit unusual. Her clothes reveal her heavy smoking habit and her avocation as family ‘handyman.’ There is no and her avocation as family ‘handyman.’ There is no seeming order or purpose for her tools, an indication seeming order or purpose for her tools, an indication of an absent-minded eccentricity. The fact that she of an absent-minded eccentricity. The fact that she chinks as she walks around the apartment reveals chinks as she walks around the apartment reveals her essential presence there: she is not easily her essential presence there: she is not easily ignored or dismissed.ignored or dismissed.

• The details make the general, first part of the The details make the general, first part of the sequence specific and concrete. The central quality sequence specific and concrete. The central quality and significance of her clothing are sharpened and and significance of her clothing are sharpened and focused by the detail. Sharpening of detail indicates focused by the detail. Sharpening of detail indicates the large scale importance and high value of her the large scale importance and high value of her clothing and, by implication, the character herself. clothing and, by implication, the character herself. This emphasis would be lost if the sentence ended This emphasis would be lost if the sentence ended with the semicolon.with the semicolon.

Documents

Voice Lessons: Detail AP Language and Composition