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Uncovering the Divine Within Workbook By Kerri AE Kannan

Uncovering the Divine Within Complete Workbook

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Uncovering the Divine

Within Workbook By Kerri AE Kannan

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Introduction

Kerri AE Kannan

This Workshop was developed through my personal experience. It was first written in 1998 but is still

useful to people today. I hope you find it useful.

I found that my image of self was cultivated during early childhood and therefore; this workshop is

centered on childhood wounds. There are some people who may not fit into this category, who later inlife found that they sensed deficiencies within themselves, or in their lives. I have included a couple of 

articles in this workshop to show some of the success stories of some of these people and how they

turned their negative feelings into positive accomplishments. If you feel that these experiences speak 

more clearly to you than the childhood wound experiences, just alter the time line to be later in their development of self.

God is also used frequently within this workshop and I use this generically. The word God to me

represents the Universe, Jesus, Allah, Great Spirit, Consciousness as well as the many other names that

are used for the One that is All. I am finding now that the word “God” and even “Spirituality” isloaded and in my more recent works, I’m moving away from that terminology but just to clarify for 

 purposes of this workshop, to me the term has nothing to do with religion.

I truly hope that this workshop helps you find the Divine within yourself, as I have found. It focuses

mostly on the recognition of the whole self who is God. Once you recognize who you are, you may feelthat the life you are living seems meaningless unless you are already doing what you were sent to earth

to do. There are a couple of articles included to help you to fulfill your purpose once you figure out

what it is. I will be developing a workshop in the future that deals with fulfilling your Life Purpose.Thank you for your participation.

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My Story

Kerri AE Kannan

When I was a child, I used to believe that I was going to be famous. I was in love with Donny Osmondand watched Sonny and Cher every week. I can remember singing "Don’t go Breakin’ my Heart" by

Elton John and Kiki Dee when I was five years old from start to finish. My mother was amazed at howI knew all the words by heart. I knew I would be a singer and told everyone that I was going to be asinger when I grew up.

One day, I was in the car with an adult relative and was asked the question of what I was going to be

when I grew up, I replied, "A singer." What followed next, changed my attitude about myself into my

adult life.

My relative replied, "A singer, well you better lose some weight if you want to be a singer. Singers areskinny." I was crushed. So young and impressionable, I believed that this was true. I tried thinking of 

all the singers I could and none of the ones I could think of were overweight. I remember thinking of 

Captain and Tenille, Marie Osmond, and Cher. Even the Magic Garden women were skinny. (I didn’t

know who Ella Fitzgerald was at the time or I would have probably challenged the response.)When I was 8 years old, I was in ballet class and had a mean old ballet teacher who probably loved

 ballet but obviously didn’t like kids, especially chubby kids. One day while warming up, we were

doing splits, (and to this day, I can drop down and do a straight split at any moment.) This particular day, we were doing Russian splits and I couldn’t get my legs to be perfectly straight. She got frustrated

with me and called me a "Fat tub o’ Lard." I told my mom and was promptly pulled out of ballet class.

In addition to this feeling of being physically inadequate, I inherited a weak bladder from my mother.

Both she and I had problems into early adolescence, (we outgrew it) of not being able to hold anyliquid in our bladders. Once I had to go to the bathroom, I had to go immediately. If I didn’t get to a

 bathroom within seconds, I would have an accident. There was no such thing as "holding it" for me and

consequently, I would have many accidents; sometimes, two in one day. I later found out that Iinherited a narrow urethra which caused chronic bladder infections and my bladder was in constant

spasm. Because of this condition, I was ridiculed by my peers and too often, humiliated by adults who

thought that this method of humiliation would make me stop having this problem. This was something

I could not control and felt ashamed and helpless every time it happened. I was beating myself upenough, I didn’t need the help of anyone to reinforce what a "baby" I was.

When I was 8, my parents got divorced. They were each going through their own pains at the time and

didn’t realize how that was affecting their children. My mother who had custody at the time, I think had

her first taste of freedom in her life and went a little overboard while leaving my brother, sister andmyself with an aunt. She wouldn’t come to us after work, and this was a period of feeling very unloved

and unimportant to me.

In my child mind, I couldn’t see that she was working overtime and doing the best she could with her situation. On the weekends, my father would take us, but he was always working and we didn’t reallyget to spend any quality time with him either. This made the little girl in me feel very unloved and

unimportant. I was not mature enough to recognize that everyone involved was coping the best way

they could with the situation at hand.

The memories of this crushing of my spirit, reinforcing feelings of inadequacy at a very young age,formed a pattern into my adulthood. I had a hard time finding a good job where I could support myself 

and feel I was doing well. I pushed love interests away by sabotaging anything that resembled a

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relationship, by either being too clingy or needy, or by being too aggressive. I often had a hard time

standing up for myself in certain situations. I would just let it slide and cry about it later, as I did when I

was a child every time I was humiliated by a judgmental adult.

In February 1993, I got a job in the Cayman Islands as an Interior Designer straight out of College andlived there for a year-and-a-half. I had a 2-year contract. However, when a Caymanian who had been a

summer intern wanted full time employment upon graduating from college, I had to leave before the

end of my contract because I no longer had my job.

On one hand, I was disappointed to have to leave and was going to try to fight it. I had finally gottensettled and made some really interesting friends through the Cayman Drama Society. I was also asked

to produce the next show. Upon further contemplation, I realized that I was really not happy there and

the only saving grace was the people I had recently come to meet.

Three months prior to my departure, a dear friend, whose family I had adopted as my extended family,left the island and moved to Delaware. When I really looked around, I saw that most of the people who

I had come to know within the year and three months prior to my joining the drama society were

leaving around the same time as me.

After I got back to the states, I moved back in with my parents and had a really hard time finding a

good job. I was substitute teaching and working in my father’s restaurant during most of the year, jumping from job-to-job, in-between looking for something more fulfilling. During the summer, I

would always land a really great job, but it only lasted a season. After 2 years of this pattern, I finally

got kicked out of the house.

I spent the next month, November, with a dear friend who let me stay in a room for 1-month. In

December, I started house sitting for my former summer boss who was going to be in the city all winter 

and needed someone to watch his house. During that time, I reached my rock bottom. I found a job in a

trendy mall restaurant where I discovered that although I grew up in the restaurant business, I wasn’tcut out to be a waitress. I was so desperate to have a job, any job, that I was commuting an hour-and-

45-minutes to get to this place and was making peanuts. I cried often and loudly and realized that there

had to be something better for me.My brother came home for Christmas 1996 and convinced me to move out of New York. I had 2choices, move to Minneapolis and be close to my brother or move to North Carolina and be close to my

sister. Although I had always been closest to my sister, I decided on Minneapolis for reasons which

didn’t make sense to me at the time, however they proved to be correct. Something inside of me keptnagging that I had to move to Minnesota because my future husband was waiting there for me. I moved

to Minnesota and sure enough, the day after I got there, I met my future husband.

During my first year in Minnesota, I was still jumping from job-to-job. I found a decent job in a

furniture store as an in-house Interior Designer. However, the longer I stayed there, the longer I realizedthis wasn't what I wanted. But I didn’t really know what I wanted.

I was getting married in April 1998 and decided that when I left for my honeymoon, I was leaving therefor good. This time, I would find something more fulfilling.

We got back from our honeymoon and I started to look into myself again to see where I was going next.

I didn’t really have to worry about money anymore because my husband was making three times myearnings and encouraged me to find my dream.

During this period, I had a "spiritual awakening." I found through retracing my patterns from

childhood, that somewhere along the line, I lost faith in myself. I saw myself as inadequate. Those

feelings related to my increase in weight and my lack of what I called a decent salary. This is where I

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needed to do my work. I first needed to love and value myself in order to be valued by others.

I found that once I recognized what it was that I must do, an immediate recognition of spirit came over 

me. I no longer blamed the people in the past who hurt me. Instead, I joyously thanked them out loud

while dancing around my living room while a whirlwind of emotions came over me. Without their harsh words and judgments, I would not have so profoundly recognized that I am perfect, the way God

made me. Without those harsh judgments, I would not have recognized that I did not love myself. I

recognized that in accepting myself fully, I discovered the unlimited supply of love that I could nowfeel within. I could now see what I was sent to do. I needed to teach others to love themselves byshowing them the methods that I used to uncover my own divine spirit within.

It is through this work with myself and the lessons that I learned through spirit, that I am meant to teach

others to love themselves. This is my purpose, the contract that I signed before birth that I must fulfill

in this lifetime. I pray that you find that this is a useful tool and find that your life flows more smoothlywith an abundance of joy, health, wealth, and love.

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Rediscovering Childhood

Kerri AE Kannan

The human experience is the one thing that we all share. When we were born, we were born intofamilies that would teach us the lessons that we need to learn in order to reach our highest potential.

This does not mean that all of us were born into the most supportive of circumstances. For the most part, the opposite is true. Throughout childhood, we are taught the illusion that things are done to usand we can not be responsible for ourselves. We are taught an illusion that we may have certain

character weaknesses such as being overactive and unable to concentrate, abused and a victim of our 

environment, or any number of dysfunctions. It is up to us to recognize these dysfunctions, accept themas part of ourselves, and they will eventually be seen as our greatest strengths and a platform for our 

highest achievements.

When we look into our childhood, many of us do not see it as perfect. Many people were neglected or 

abused; we felt unloved or unappreciated. Children bury their feelings when they are not treated withrespect, honesty, and consideration. Many children blame themselves if a marriage is breaking up or if 

there are financial difficulties. Children may carry the guilt of a parent leaving or feel responsible if 

they are shuffled from foster-home to foster-home. Children do not understand that these are problemsthat their parents have, not them.

Because of this, many children harbor feelings of worthlessness, inability to be loved and give love.

They feel they were abandoned because they were bad, etc. Too often, these feelings are brought into

adulthood and manifest as adult behavior. As adults, we can plainly see how other adults may not treat

others fairly. We do not, however, normally recognize that this person is a product of their upbringingand has their own wounds to overcome.

You can see "Bad Parenting" every time you go into a supermarket. Oftentimes, the parent never 

learned how to be a good parent and is just leading by example. Unfortunately, the effects of "Bad

Parenting" do not end with childhood. It manifests into the adulthood of the ill-treated child and, many

times, the behavior cycle will be repeated in the next generation unless the person affected by "BadParenting" has the strength to look inside to see who they really are. They must dig really deeply to see

the root cause of the pain within themselves that causes them to inflict this pain on others. If this is notrecognized, the pattern will repeat. Unless the adult person is ready and willing to face the pain of the

 past, they will not mature and transcend it. They will, instead, deal with the problem later, on a

superficial basis; or they will hope that it will just go away. Unfortunately, this does not usually happenand by the time they are forced to face it, the problem has reached crisis proportions.

In the following series of questions, we will uncover the areas of our childhood where we expressed

our spirit through laughter and fun. We will see where we were supported and where we were not. We

will see where we were stunted and where we were encouraged in our growth. We will touch on our  perceived positive and negative qualities and how we came to recognize them as categorizations of 

 positive and negative.

Questions

1. Write down something you loved to do as a child.

2. Do you still do this? If not, why not? Did you outgrow it or stop doing it for a reason?

3. What do you love to do now? What is your passion? Do you have one?

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4. Can you think of any talents such as creativity or the ability to figure out how things work; maybe an

inherent knowledge about materials and their properties or being able to somehow communicate with

animals? Anything that you brought into your adult life.

5. Name between 3 and 10 things that you love about yourself. Can you think of any unique things thatyou know or can do?

6. Name between 1 and 10 things you don’t like about yourself. Is there a common thread between all

the things you don’t like about yourself? If so, write that down.

7. Did you have a happy childhood? Were you supported in your development? Name as many

instances as you can where you felt totally supported as a child.

Exercise to try:

Take a look at the traits and characteristics that you don’t like about yourself, compare them to the traits

and characteristics that you do like. By themselves, can you see anything negative about thesecharacteristics? If a child who you love told you that they had these negative feelings about themselves,

what would you say to the child to help him or her to see past the perceived imperfections?

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Recognizing Our Wounds

Kerri AE Kannan

When delving into the depths of spirit to find our wounds, many of us have no idea where to start. Weknow that there are certain things about ourselves that we don’t like and on the surface we can even

rattle them off as if they were a grocery list. What we do not recognize is where and when weconcluded that these specific characteristics were unacceptable. We are also often unaware that they areoften all linked to a central core or root that branches off and manifests as symptoms of the core hatred.

We are so busy beating ourselves up for our perceived imperfections that we have forgotten why we

started beating ourselves up in the first place.

It is against our conditioning to fully accept ourselves as whole and completely love ourselves as weare. Most of us beat ourselves up because of negative experiences in childhood where we learned to

only accept some parts of ourselves and reject others. We take over beating ourselves up where our 

childhood experiences left off. Why do we continually judge ourselves and others for what we perceiveas imperfections? What is an imperfection? Is it some physical or emotional trait that in the eyes of 

God is unacceptable? Is it possible for God, who is love, to create anything less than perfect, or is it a

method of self-destruction that keeps us from truly experiencing love?

When we beat ourselves up for what we perceive as imperfections, we are denying ourselves of the truelove of self. It is not possible to halfheartedly love ourselves; we either do, or we do not. We are all part

of God and because of that, we are all perfect. If this were not true, God who lives in all things, would

not be perfect. God is love and therefore once you find love for yourself, you will find God within.

Searching for the roots of our wounds is not easy. We must mentally relive the most difficult times of our lives; the events that made us feel the most inadequate. These are the moments where we fell victim

to insane judgments and believed that they were true. These moments are the pinnacle points where our 

feelings of self-love and acceptance were crushed because of our false perceptions of our own

imperfections.

What sane adult would blame a child for being beaten by an adult four times his size? This is an insane

 perception. However, the child would most likely grow up believing that he was beaten due to some

fault of his own. A child cannot step back to look objectively at his surroundings. The conditioning that

we receive as children is normally what we believe as adults. The abused child will most likely growup with a feeling of inadequacy, self-hatred and guilt for reasons he can not define.

Once we are brave enough to revisit the past and identify the core of our self-loathing, and identify the

core, we are well on our way to loving ourselves again and finding God within.

Questions

1. Are there any incidences you can remember involving your parents or primary caregiver that werevery powerful and left you with a feeling of being unappreciated, hurt, humiliated or unloved? Can youstill remember the incident? Do you still cringe or get angry? Please write down the incident in as much

detail as you can.

2. Are there any incidences you can remember involving a teacher or mentor that were very powerful

and left you feeling unappreciated, hurt, humiliated or unloved? Can you remember the incident? Doyou still cringe or get angry? Please write down the incident in as much detail as you can.

3. Can you remember any incidences involving strangers or other children that were very powerful and

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left you feeling unappreciated, hurt, humiliated or unloved? Can you remember the incident? Do you

still cringe or get angry? Please write down the incident in as much detail as you can.

4. Can you think of any incidences that reinforce any of your childhood wounds as an adult? Any

situations that left you feeling unappreciated, hurt, humiliated or unloved? Please write down theincident in as much detail as you can.

5. Can you think of any incidences in your adult life that left you feeling helpless or forsaken? Please

write the incident down in as much detail as you can. Please include any feelings you can express.

Exercise to try:

Write a letter to the people who hurt you in childhood and explain to them how they hurt you. You

don’t have to send it, just putting it down on paper should be enough. Many times, people have no idea

what affect they have had on people. A passing comment may have an emotional impact for life. If youfeel compelled, you can call the person and explain to them as an adult how this affected you.

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The Journey Toward Wholeness

http://www.kerrikannan.com/

For most of us, recognizing our true selves takes a lifetime of searching, discovering truths, regressingto old patterns, and then recognizing ourselves again. We will take "two steps forward, and one step

 back." This is all in God's plan. Each time we take those two steps, we see the next level that we willeventually incorporate into our lives and believe as truth. When we take the step back, we arereevaluating what we have already learned and landing on the foundation which we have already built.

During the time of my writing this, my two steps are fresh in my memory. I have realized that I must

teach others what I have learned in order to truly understand my experience. A Course In Miracles

teaches that we are all teachers and we are all students. Once we recognize what it is that we must do,we must teach it so that we can better learn it. Everyone taking this course is my teacher as well as I am

yours. I am helping you to find your wholeness and you are helping me to solidify my truth.

It is through finding your truth that you must teach others. Only you can truly find it for yourself. This

workshop is a guide and I hope you will use it often when you feel that you have taken that step back. I

have given you a tool to help you find those parts of yourself which you reject. It is up to you torecognize, acknowledge, accept and transform those thoughts into love.

Most importantly, I have found that asking for help from God to release negative attitudes about myself 

has been most useful. God helps us through baby steps. We must first take the first step, then we aregiven the second. We may recognize God's help through a song we can’t get out of our head, or a book 

that "jumps" off the shelf, or through a conversation at the next table in a restaurant where we feel they

are talking directly to us. It is also helpful to remember that we are all part of God, working together toward deliverance. Wherever you are on your journey, do not get frustrated with yourself. Be patient,

ask for help and you will find help in the least expected places.

Questions

1. Do people tell you things about yourself that you find hard to accept or believe? For example, have

you ever been told you were a genius or a natural leader, or beautiful and thought that the person just

didn’t know you well enough or was just saying that to make you feel good?

2. When you say this sentence to yourself, what does your rational brain tell you? "I am a wonderful,lovable person and I love every aspect of myself unconditionally."

3. Take some time to evaluate your answers and write down any thoughts that you have. Write down

any common themes in your answers.

4. Now, take some time to do a little inner self-reflection. What is it that you judge most harshly about

yourself? This is the part of yourself that you must acknowledge and accept in order to start your 

 journey toward wholeness.

5. Now, do this little exercise. Find a quiet place and sit in a comfortable chair. Take 5 deep breaths, all

the way in and all the way out. With each inhaled breath, inhale love and happiness. With each exhaled

 breath, exhale self judgment, fear, and hatred. Once you are comfortable and feel the love bursting to break free, ask the God to take all your regrets, painful memories, fears, and judgments from the past

and transform them into strength, happiness, acceptance and love. Give thanks and open your eyes

when you are ready.

 

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The Power of Thought and Transformation

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The power of thought is not yet fully understood. It is not just thinking that something will happen thatmakes it happen, it is also feeling in our hearts and down to our bones that something is true that makes

it happen. If we say we are worthy of making a great salary, but do not feel that way down to our core,it is the same as not believing we can make a great salary. The good thing about thought is that we cantrain ourselves to believe whatever we want. We were trained to believe that we have inadequacies

which we did not believe before we entered into this lifetime, and therefore, we can train ourselves to

 believe the opposite of those thought patterns. Just because we can change our thought patterns doesnot mean it is easy. It took us our entire lifetime to believe what we do about ourselves now. It could

take that amount of time to heal our thoughts about ourselves.

There are many people who have publicly praised the power of thought and how it changed their lives.

These people have used methods of visualization, affirmations and other tools to transform themselvesand their lives into something more preferable.

In order to change ones mind, we must first recognize what destructive thought patterns we believe.Upon identification of these patterns, we can then work on changing those patterns. For example: We

may think that we are fat and tell ourselves that we are thin. For me, this is not where my negative pattern is rooted. My negative pattern is in my lack of self-love. Telling myself "I am thin" will not

work because this is only a symptom. By telling myself that I love myself unconditionally, this will

allow me to accept my body as it is and not obsess over my weight.

I saw myself as unworthy of love, and therefore attributed it to my weight, not my heart. I mayeventually lose the excess weight that I have, however, I will no longer obsess over it. I am for the first

time in my life accepting myself as I am, and loving what I see. Now when I look at myself in the

mirror, I see a sexy goddess, not an unlovable fatso. I now like the extra flesh on my bones, I look a bit

like a Rubens nude.

The transformation of thought about myself has not made me look any differently than I did before I

had the change of thought. However, I now see myself in such a positive light that I now feel ten times

sexier and more lovable than before. It is I who previously made the harsh judgments about myself. If 

you feel great about yourself, people will see you as the self image you project. Whatever you feelabout yourself is projected in your energy, nothing else.

Questions

1. Can you think of any tragedies that happened in your childhood or adult life? How did this affect

you? How did you cope with the tragedy? Search your feelings, do you still feel emotionally scarred?

2. Do you somehow feel responsible for this tragedy? Do you have any regrets regarding this tragedy?Do you harbor any judgments regarding this tragedy? If so, please write in as much detail as you canthe events and your feelings toward all involved with this/these event/s.

3. Can you see any patterns between these harsh judgments and the way you see yourself today? Do

you feel unappreciated, stupid, restricted, fat, lazy, crazy, or do you have any other feelings that you are

somehow not a wonderful blessed lovable person?

4. Can you find a link between thoughts and feelings in childhood where you were hurt and your thoughts about yourself today? If so, how do these feelings affect your adult life?

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5. Can you see a pattern or patterns between your impressions as a child and your thoughts and actions

as an adult?

6. Can you see how these thoughts are ingrained in you after years of self non-acceptance? Do you see

how these thoughts manifest in your body, love life, paycheck and your health.

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Prayer

http://www.kerrikannan.com/

Prayer is also a great tool to use. I found that a really good book which is full of prayers is Illuminata

 by Marianne Williamson. I am a library person and would suggest going to your local library to collecta few good prayer books.

Meditation is also a wonderful form of prayer. I normally just sit silently with my eyes closed and justfeel the presence of God. God comes to me through a soothing ocean of light, or sometimes, as just a

glowing from within. You can also ask a question in your meditation and wait for an answer. Normally,

answers come to me pretty quickly; however, sometimes, I do not get an answer. This means I am not

asking the right question.

Look in the mirror and say affirmations to yourself. If you feel unappreciated, or you think you are

ugly, tell yourself that you unconditionally love and appreciate yourself or you think you are beautiful.

After awhile, you will find that others will see you the same way.

 

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Your Special Function:

According to A Course in Miracles©

by Jon Snodgrass, Ph.D. (with permission)

 A Course in Miracles teaches that we have a "Special Function" to fulfill in life and that it is the reasonwe came to earth. For example, Lesson 319 states, "I came for the salvation of the world," and the Text

states, "You wanted it and it is given to you" (T-25.VI.7:3).

This brief article attempts to understand the concept of Special Function in the Course. What we think 

of as everyday reality is considered an illusion in the Course, so the word "reality" is placed in quoteswhenever the conventional definition is indicated.

As "individuals in reality," we are taught that we are separated from God and, therefore, fear that we

are small, weak and alone. We try to overcome our presumed loss of connection to God, by substituting

romantic relationships, and career accomplishments, as our life-purpose.

As an alternative point of view, the Course offers the idea of "Special Function." The concept is

entwined throughout the Text, but there is a two-page section entitled, "The Special Function," in

Chapter 25, "The Justice of God." (T-25.VI:4). A key sentence is:

To each He gives a special function in salvation he alone can fill; a part for only him. Nor is the plancomplete until he finds his special function, and fulfills the part assigned to him, to make himself 

complete within a world where incompletion rules.

The concept of Special Function also comes up in many lessons; for example, the title of Lesson 64 is,

"Let me not forget my function," and Lesson 139 states, "We have a mission here."

The quote above indicates that we are given a "special function in salvation," meaning, according to theGlossary-Index of the Course by Kenneth Wapnick, "the Atonement, or undoing of the separation."

Therefore, we each have a unique role to play in the salvation of the world through finding our ownsalvation. You are our savior as you are your own.

Your Special Function has a dual nature: that the world is saved as the individual is saved. The reverse,that we are saved as the world is saved, is not valid because this view overlooks the crucial contribution

of the individual. In resolving the separation from God within our own mind, the separation of the

world is ended, and all distinctions disappear into a union of one.

The concept of Special Function may appear frightening at first because it makes us each like Jesus, thesavior of the world, and introduces the idea, made explicit in the Teacher's Manual, that it takes only

one person to save humanity. The opposite, that the individual is saved as the world is saved, cannot be

true because there is no separation of Reality into "reality."

So what does Special Function mean that we actually do in our daily life. All political endeavorsheretofore directed at social change have been misguided, via projection of the illusion, and appear to

 perpetuate the very schisms sought to be transcended. "The Special Function" section states:

The specialness he chose to hurt himself did God appoint to be the means for his salvation, from the

very instant that the choice was made. His special sin was made his special grace. His special hate became his special love (T-25.VI.6:6).

Your Special Function is the polar opposite of what you believe to be the reality of your own guilt, sin

and victimization. Whatever you think is your problem, is your answer, what is missing is your gift,

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your weakness is your strength, your damnation is your salvation, your special dysfunction is your 

Special Function.

The form is suited to your special needs, and to the special time and place in which you think you find

yourself, and where you can be free of place and time, and all that you believe must limit you. The Sonof God cannot be bound by time nor place nor anything God did not will (T-25.VII.7:3).

Each of us can easily articulate our list of grievances against ourselves and others, and state readily our 

standard set of complaints about contemporary social life. Our life-purpose, however, often eludes us

and is hidden from our awareness. This quote clarifies that the way to know your calling is through thereversal of the unique way in which you think you are maligned in the world.

By solving the one problem, the separation from God in your mind, by giving up your socially acquired

 belief in your unique dysfunction, you undo your hypothetical separation, and simultaneously discover 

what you have to offer to others as a livelihood. What you are doing with your life right now containsyour life-purpose and no radical transformation is required.

Your Special Function exists like the positive of a photograph, in the negative of your grievances. In

undergoing the process of salvation for yourself, your Special Function in life is uncovered. "Without

your special function has this world no meaning for you" (T-26.I.5:2). If you are "not smart," for 

example, your work is to help others discover their intelligence by first wanting to find your own.

If you feel "abandoned," you are to help others learn to care for themselves by first not abandoning

yourself. If you are "not recognized," you are to help others find recognition by first recognizing

yourself. If you "lack faith," you are to help others find faith by believing first in yourself. If you are a"victim of abuse," you are to help liberate others by giving up first your self-abuse. If you are

"physically ill," you are to help others heal by first healing yourself.

Each specific example involves changing your mind about your mind to find your life purpose. The

 peace that ensues from ending the separation in your mind allows your Special Function to be seen asthe exact opposite of your perceived persecution. Like modern beatitudes, the inversion of the illusion

is your mission and salvation.

Potentially, the weakest are the strongest for they know not how to fight. The faithless are the most

devout for they know devotion to faithlessness. The dullest are the brightest for they know no inventionof imitations. The unrecognized stand out the most for they know inclusion among the unseen. The

 physically ill, and physically abused, are the most free for they know pain and suffering.

It is not necessary to know the entire answer to your Special Function in advance. The plan is not of 

you, nor need you be concerned with anything except the part that has been given you to learn. For heWho knows the rest will see to it without your help (T-20.IV.6:6).

The Course emphasizes peace of mind attained first by wanting to learn to forgive. Forgiveness is a

 pardon of guilt issued to everyone involved in your mental disputes, particularly you and God. The idea

then becomes: be willing to learn to forgive to attain peace of mind to find your Special Function to

save yourself and the world for God. "Forgiveness is the only function meaningful in time" (T-25.VI.5:3).

Forgiveness is your general function while your particular work in salvation is your Special Function

(although this distinction is not one made in the Course). Your Special Function is the "still much to doin time" (T-25.VI.5:8). Lesson 192, "I have a function God would have me fill," emphasizes the link 

 between Special Function and forgiveness.

Your Special Function will become evident in your awareness as a consequence of the psychic peace

that ensues with forgiveness. Knowledge of your assignment is already possessed, but its acquisition is

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mixed up by your confusion of Reality with "reality." You may think that the separation from God is

real and that your Special Function is false.

If you insist that you will only have peace of mind after you find your Special Function, you are partly

correct, but you are reversing the process, possibly out of fear that your Special Function is withheld byGod (like salvation). The means and the end are one, however, and salvation is your Special Function.

In striving to find your life-purpose you may overlook willingness to forgive that is a prerequisite.

Willingness is foremost, and peace of mind its effect, that occurs once it is your intention to allow it.

What a willing state of mind looks like, and how you know when you are there, are also answered after you are willing.

Teach me to be willing is the issue and you will only know consciously after it has happened. Insisting

on knowing, "whom will I be, once I fulfill my Special Function," is not the same as letting yourself be

there. The fundamental distinction is wanting to be, or not wanting to be, connected to God in your mind. When you are there, the journey is over, even as a metaphor, and you can reside with a life-

 purpose in the grace of God everyday.

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Life Purpose

http://www.kerrikannan.com/

We are all put on this earth for a purpose. This purpose is one that each individual alone must fulfill inorder for humanity to move to the next level. It is within your contract that you entered into before this

life that you will fulfill your purpose in this life. The longer we wait, the longer the whole of humanitywill wait for deliverance.

This purpose is often times the thing that many people yearn to do, but often times, do not know whereto look, where to even start, to find their perfect "job." This is not found in the classified advertisements

in the Sunday paper or through that expensive private education. These methods may be temporarily

satisfying, however, unless you are following the call of your heart, chances are, you will eventually become restless and look for something better.

The something better is within. It is within your heart, where you would least expect it. It is not what

you have learned over many years and have grown to like, it is not something that you have to learn.

Instead, it is something that you discovered during your childhood, or sometime in your past. It is the

 part of you that brings you joy. Perhaps it’s the love of trains that you have relegated to the basement of life or an interest in bugs that you decided was weird because of peer pressure. It may be something

that you do and do not appreciate as a gift or something you feel anyone can do. Search within, find thelove within and it will be obvious to you like a bright beacon of warm light on the coldest darkest

winter day.

For many, in order to recognize our purpose, we must overcome what we see as our own inadequacies.

It may not be something we can touch, perhaps it may be more like an idea or a feeling. It may berelated to a tragic experience that we had or something that we feel has been done to us. It may be a

feeling of utter helplessness. We may feel forsaken because of something that we feel we can't control.

We may feel that we must help others to regain something in their lives, but what? It may be something

within ourselves that we must accept and love as a part of our whole in order to gain an understanding

of who we really are.

We, alone, are the only ones who can fulfill our own contracts. It may be our deepest fears, our deepest

hatreds, our most critical judgments of ourselves or others. Our self-loathing and judgment is what

keeps most of us from fulfilling our life purpose and is also what is blanketing us from the divinewithin ourselves. This is what we must overcome and recognize, accept as part of ourselves and teach

others that which we have learned.

Whatever we believe about ourselves will manifest. If we believe we are stupid and don’t deserve to

make a great salary, sure enough, we will be seen as stupid and will make next to nothing. If we believewe are fat and ugly and nobody could possibly love us... guess what? On the other hand, if we believe

in our hearts that we are strong and intelligent and deserve the best in life, we will get exactly what we

deserve. This is the power of thought. It is up to all of us to recognize that we are so very loved andhave exactly the right tools to succeed beyond our wildest imaginations. Together, we will awaken to a

higher consciousness and will recognize that we are all perfect. It is up to each of us individually to

find our own purpose. Nobody can find it for us and hand it to us.

There may be times when we revert to our old thoughts, but we won’t forget totally what we truly are.Once we recognize who we truly are, each time we forget, it will be easier for us to remember again

that we are perfect and whole until we forget no more. We are all one spirit, Divine spirit. We are all of 

one mind and therefore, all of our thoughts affect each other. When we judge ourselves harshly, we hurteveryone. We are all children of the one reality, God.

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The process of self acceptance does not come after years of working out in the gym or a Ph.D. in

 Nuclear Physics. You could go through all the work of physically or mentally exercising your muscles

and still feel inadequate. You must believe it within your heart, unconditionally, that you are perfect just

the way you are.

For some, this may take years of digging or it may take a moment. This depends upon the individual

and how resistant the soul is to finding true happiness. This will seem frightening to most as we

uncover parts of ourselves that we may not truly accept. However, once we have walked the tightropeand found that we have gotten to the other side safely, the exuberance that we feel will be like nofeeling we have ever felt before.