May 2016

Issue V Vol. V

5205 Greenwood Ave. Ste 110 West Palm Beach, FL 33407

561-588-3477 www.namipbc.org

The Voice

As president of NAMI Palm Beach County I am responsible for authoring an article in the Presi-dent’s Message column of our monthly newsletter. Some articles are better than others, but every month presents an opportunity to tell a story or convey information that I think will be of interest to our membership. This month I chose to reprint my first article, and offer a brief update on my son’s progress.

Lessons Learned on the Road to Recovery

I never really knew my son, Jonathan, before dis-covering that he suffers from mental illness. As a child, Jonathan was bright, popular, and skilled in practically everything he did. He graduated high school with honors, excelled in college, and estab-lished a respectable career for himself as a comput-er software engineer. To me, Jonathan seemed hap-py and content and his mother and I took great pride in his many accomplishments. Given Jona-than’s exceptional gifts, it is not surprising that he was able to successfully hide the mental illness that had become part of his daily life for so long. Ulti-mately, however, the burdens of secrecy and denial caused him to become irritable and aloof, and over time, Jonathan’s efforts to keep his condition secret exacted an enormous toll on our relationship.

I was in my office when I received a telephone call from the doctor at the hospital in Washington, D.C., telling me that Jonathan had admitted himself to the psychiatric ward with symptoms of psycho-sis. After struggling for years to cope on his own, Jonathan’s long kept secret was finally exposed. At the time, I naively worried that his latest problem might make it difficult for him to explain a large time gap on his resume. And so began my education and journey into the world known only by families

whose lives have been affected by loved ones with mental illness.

What followed over the next several years were many extended hospitalizations, countless dollars spent on ineffective treatments, profound disap-pointments, and finally, a medication that helps. My wife and I have walked through more locked double doors and sat in more waiting rooms, and retold the story of our son’s illness to more intake workers than either of us care to re-member. We’ve watched Jonathan walk in circles for hours and have seen him engage in other seemingly random rituals that made us both laugh and cry at the same time.

Along the way, I’ve learned that large pharma-ceutical companies are not all heartless and greedy, and that many have humane programs to supply medications that would otherwise be una-vailable due to the prohibitive cost. I’ve learned there are government workers who will abuse their power to deny benefits to the most needy and vulnerable of our society without giving it a second thought, and there are others who will go out of their way to make sure you’re fully in-formed and comforted so that your burden may be lessened by their assistance. I’ve learned that all government programs are flawed, and that if you think you’re right, you need to keep fighting no matter what you’re told. I’ve learned that I am not alone.

The most important lesson I’ve learned is the strength of my son’s character. The strength of a person's character isn't fully tested until life goes awry. There's nothing like a vanishing career, lost friends and a body and mind that seem to betray you at every turn, to make a person's charac-ter glaringly obvious. I used to think of my son as handsome, intelligent, and accomplished in his profession. I now know that these attributes

(Cont.d on page 2)

PRESIDENT’S MESSAGE

By Manny Kushner

WHAT’S COMING UP!

Page 2

We answered 207 phone calls

5 attended the Cognitive Enhancement Therapy

3 attended NAMI Peer-to-Peer Education

125 attended NAMI Presentations

79 participated in NAMI Peer Council and

N.O.W. activities

33 attended NAMI/PBC Family Support Groups

149 attended NAMI Connection Groups

21 attended the NAMI/PBC Y oung Adults Group

3 attended the NAMI/PBC Adolescent Support

Groups

6 REACH for Teens mentored

In March NAMI/PBC served

658 individuals

(Cont.d from page 1) don’t come close to defining who he is as a per-son. The strength of Jonathan’s character allowed him to rise above the pure despair that I felt - long before I was willing to accept his illness. Looking back, I now realize that the reality of untreated men-tal illness was so painful to Jonathan, that he was no longer embarrassed by the disease - only in his prior belief that it must remain a secret.

When I think of my son now, I think of his enor-mous courage and compassion. He worries about his younger brothers doing well in the world, and as-sures me that he has enough money when I know he does not. Jonathan greets me every week with a smile and often reminds me of how he told me, way back in his first hospital visit, that everything would be o.k.

Today is Jonathan’s 29th birthday. He takes fifteen pills a day, and reports that he hears voices about ten percent of his waking hours. He lives in an apartment with his two younger brothers, who are a testament to the strength of their credo that “no brother will be left behind.” My wife and I speak with Jonathan regularly, and every Saturday, Jona-than and I have the gift of spending time with each other. I take him for his weekly blood work, where he knows everyone’s names and asks about their families. We pick up his medicine and while I fill up his weekly pill dispenser, we laugh about how he used to tell me his life does not travel in a straight line - as if this was something he had to call to my attention.

Jonathan is now 33 years old. He has been stable for the past four years, and has carved out a reward-ing and enjoyable life for himself. We try to get to-gether on Saturdays, but some weeks, he’s just too busy.

NAMI GENERAL MEETING

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

6:00 pm - 8:00 pm

NAMI of Palm Beach County, 5205 Greenwood Ave #110, West Palm Beach, FL 33407

Join us for May’s General Meeting

“Maximizing Your Health:

Bringing Out the Best You!” • Treatment Regimen

• Medication Compliance • Preventative Care

• Medical Care • Health and Wellness

Presented by:

Fontaine Timmer, RN, MSN, BSW, FCN Director of Volunteer Nurse Corps

Palm Beach Atlantic

NAMI/PBC General Meeting are free and open to

the general public.

Drive by the NAMI PBC office at 5205 Greenwood Ave-nue in West Palm and see the Mollie Wilmot Pavilion lit up in green!

WHAT’S COMING UP

Page 3

NAMI PEER COUNCIL MEETING Friday, May 27, 5:30 pm

Join us for pizza and refreshments.

NAMI Office, 1520 10th Avenue, N., Suite D Lake Worth, FL 33460

Call Michael at 561-588-3477 to RSVP

NAMI On Wednesdays (N.O.W.)

Join us for Arts & Crafts, Book Club, Games,

Speakers, Computer Training, Advocacy, Movies

and more at NAMI On Wednesdays (N.O.W.),

11:00 am - 4:00 pm

NAMI PBC Office 1520 10th Avenue, N., Suite D., Lake Worth, FL

NAMI TEEN GROUP

A recreational and social group for teens guided by

Peer Specialists. Are you interested in art, games,

and socializing? Contact Peter Davey for more infor-

mation at 561-588-3477.

Bruce Hammond, Merrill Deitz Carol Passeser

Peer Council’s March Five and Shine Car Wash and Tag Sale was a great success! Peer Council volunteers washed 16 cars. The days was full of suds and fun!

On Sunday, May 15, 1:00 pm, the Peer Council

will visit the Palm Beach Zoo. $5.00 per person.

Five will save you ten. Regular ticket price is $15, so

take advantage of this discount! Reservations re-

quired.

Call Michael or Chris at 561-588-3477 for more

information.

IN THE NEWS

Page 4

CRISIS INTERVENTION TEAM

By Dorothy Kelleher

If you have a loved one in crisis and need the services of a CIT officer, you should

call 911 and give the necessary information to the dispatcher, making sure the dis-

patcher understands that you do need a CIT officer sent to the scene. NAMI and CIT

work closely together in providing this service.

NAMI Executive Director,

Marsha Martino

NAMI Lead Certified

Peer Specialist, Peter

Davey

On March 29, NAMI

presented to 80

attendees at the Lead-

ership Palm Beach

County Lunch and

Learn.

On April 15, Margaret Donnelley,

mental health advocate and NAMi

Honorary Board Member, received

the Community Outreach Award by

the PBC Medical Society.

Young Adults’ Word Art Project lead by

Peter Davey; quote by Alex Williams

From Left: Margaret Donnelley and Dr. William Atkins

Peer and Family Support Groups Call 561-588-3477 for more information

NAMI/PBC Connection Recovery Support Groups

Lake Worth (NAMI Office) 1520 10th Avenue N, Suite D Lake Worth, FL 33460 Saturdays 6:00-7:30pm

Delray Beach (Toole Building So. County Mental Health Center) 16158 S Military Trail, Delray Beach, FL 33484 Mondays 1:45-2:45pm & Wednesdays 10:15-11:30am

Hypoluxo (Amigos Group — Jeff Industries) 111 E Coast Avenue, Hypoluxo, FL 33462 Mondays 2:30-4:00pm

Jupiter (Southeast Florida Behavioral Health Network) 140 Intracoastal Pointe Dr., Suite 208, Jupiter, FL 33477 Mondays 5:30-7:00pm

NAMI/PBC Young Adults Group 18-35 Year Olds

Lake Worth (NAMI Office) 1520 10th Avenue N, Suite D, Lake Worth, FL 33460 First 3 Fridays of the month 6:00-7:30pm

NAMI/PBC Adolescent Support Groups - Regis-

tration Required

NAMI/PBC Family Support Groups

West Boca (West Boca Raton Library) 18685 State Road 7, Boca Raton, FL 33498 1st Tuesday 6:30-8:00pm

Boynton Beach/ Delray Beach (Hagen Ranch Library) 14350 Hagen Ranch Road, Delray Beach, FL 33446 2nd Tuesday 6:15-7:45pm

Jupiter (Southeast Behavioral Health) 140 Intracoastal Pointe Dr, Ste 208, Jupiter, FL 33477 3rd Thursday 6:30-8:00pm

Wellington (Wellington Regional Library) RESTARTING May 9 1951 Royal Fern Drive, Wellington, FL 33414 2nd Monday 6:30-8:00pm

Other Local Support Groups for Peers

Other Local Family Support Groups

Family Grace Group First Presbyterian Church Youth Building 717 Prosperity Farms Road, North Palm Beach, FL 33408 1st Monday 6:30pm Jeni Ayers 561-309-5675 ayersjeni@gmail.com for more information

Alliance for Eating Disorders Awareness Friends and Family Support Group Alliance for Eating Disorder Awareness Office 1649 Forum Place #2, West Palm Beach, FL 33401 1st and 3rd Wednesdays 7:00-8:30pm

GROUP MEETINGS

South County Mental Health Center Depression Bipolar Support Alliance 16158 S Military Trail, Delray Beach, FL 33484 1-877-858-7474 for directions ALL DISORDERS (Building E. — Toole Building) Wednesdays 7:00-9:00pm

Peer Place Support Center 2100 45th Street, Suite B12, West Palm Beach, FL 33407 561-712-0584 for directions and information Schizophrenics Anonymous Mon, Weds, Fri, 2:00pm-3:00pm DRA (Living in the Now) (12 Step Co-occurring) Tues, Thurs,

Sat. 10:30am-11:30am Peer Support Mon-Fri 9:00am-4:00pm; Sat 9am-1pm

Fair Oaks Pavilion (Behind Delray Community Hospital) 5440 Linton Blvd, Ste 1010, Delray Beach, FL 33484 Depression Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) Mondays 7:00 pm 561-716-7511 Jupiter Fire Station No. 19 322 N. Central Boulevard, Jupiter, FL 33458 561-633-7525 for information Depression/Bipolar Thursdays 7:00-8:30pm

West Boca Medical Education Center 21644 State Road 7, Boca Raton, FL 33428 For directions and info: Jason Spielman 954-217-1757 OCD 1st Thursday 7:30-8:30pm

Trauma Support Group Center for Trauma Counseling, Inc. 801 Lake Worth Road, Suite 101, Lake Worth, FL 33467 Tuesdays 6:30-8:00 pm, Contact Helya 561-444-3914

Support for Eating Disorders and Dual Diagnosis Alliance for Eating Disorder Awareness 1649 Forum Place #2, West Palm Beach, FL 33401 Thursdays 6:30-8:00pm *18+ females, please

Jupiter 50 South US Highway 1, Suite 309, Jupiter, FL 33477 Grades 7-8: Mondays 5:30-6:30pm Grades 9-12: Mondays 6:30-7:30pm

Page 5

NAMI/PBC N.O.W. (NAMI on Wednesdays)

Lake Worth (NAMI Office) 1520 10th Avenue N, Suite D, Lake Worth, FL 33460 Wednesdays 11:00am-4:00pm

NEW - NAMI Teen Group — Social/recreation If interested, contact Peter Davey for more details at 561-588-3477.

BOOK REVIEW -- LILLY AND DUNKIN, Donna Gephart By Marsha Martino, NAMI PBC Executive Director My husband and I met Donna Gephart and her husband Dan back in 2011. Like my husband and I, Donna and Dan had enrolled in NAMI’s Family to Family (F2F) Education program. F2F, as we affectionately call it, is a 12-week course for family members of individuals living with mental illness. It is an informative class, teaching attendees current information about various mental illnesses, treatment and resources. But for many of us, one of the main takeaways was development of empathy for our loved one by understanding the subjective, lived experience of a person with mental illness. We gained an appreciation for the courage required by many of our family members just to make it through the day. We commended our loved one’s heroism and learned how we could help provide encouragement and support as they navigated life’s challenges. Through our introductions I learned that Donna was a writer of young adult books. Interesting, yes, but more rele-vant to those weeks of conversation were the challenges, fears, hopes and dreams that each of us shared as we discussed the uncertainties facing us and the person we loved. I remember Donna’s humor and her upbeat sense of optimism and hope. Long after the classes had ended, Donna and Dan remained our friends. And although I delighted at Donna’s literary successes, I will admit that I never read one of her books. After all, my kids were grown and Death by Toilet Paper did not fit into my preferred literary category of historical fiction. When I learned that Donna was working on a book about two friends -- one who had bipolar disorder and the oth-er who was transgender, I was intrigued. I knew I would have to check this one out. I was certain that Donna’s ex-perience as the parent of a young man with mental illness would give her an interesting perspective and insight. Al-though Lily and Dunkin is due to be released on May 3rd, Donna graciously gave me an advanced copy! How ex-citing! I found Lily and Dunkin to be inspiring and informative. Lily is a transgender youth and Dunkin has bipolar disorder. They both face these challenges as well as other stressors experienced by kids in the tween years of their lives. Luckily both Lily and Dunkin have loving families. However, as many of us know, watching a loved one struggle can complicate a relationship. Maintaining support yet giving someone the space to grow; offering guidance yet ac-cepting someone as they are, not how we think they should be. This book reminded me of the delicate balance that we as parents face with our children as we watch them grow up and make their way in the world. The book is written in first person, alternating between the characters of Lily and Dunkin. This is my favorite style of writing as it allows the reader to change their perception of an incident as they learn of it from another’s point of view. As the friendship of Lily and Dunkin develops, we gain the two characters’ perspectives and growing un-derstanding of the personality, character, and difficulties facing the other, and we hear these thoughts expressed directly by the two main characters. These are two very sweet, introspective, vulnerable young adults who are searching to find their place in a sometimes cruel world. The concern and empathy that they find for the other as they try to navigate their own situation is touching. Donna’s description of the situation many parents face when weighing their thoughts and values on medication against the thoughts and values of their offspring is right on. Young adults have the right to start making decisions about their own bodies. But what if those decisions cause them harm? What if they are irreversible? Then there is the dilemma faced by many who take medications daily to mitigate symptoms. Balanc-ing the benefits vs the side effects—to some this is a daily decision. And on some days, the risk seems to outweigh the benefits. The book definitely has some lighthearted moments. These kids really do have full per-sonalities. Their lives contain positive and sometimes funny characters and events: a grandmother who is an exercise fanatic, the love of coffee and jelly donuts; the joy of climbing high up into the branches of a tree. I was pleased that the book ended on a hopeful note. It feels as if the good and supportive parts of life (including the friend-ship of each other) will outweigh the difficulties the characters have yet to face.

THINGS TO KNOW

Page 6

HOW THE MIND HELPS HEAL THE BODY

How mental and physical health is affected by the way we perceive and relate to it.

By Ed Halliwell | February 19, 2016, www.mindful.org

Response to the Article By

Peter Davey, Lead Peer Specialist

Mindfulness meditation techniques can be learned with a group, but they are something you have to practice on

your ohm. One thing you may not know about me is that I love psychosomatic medicine. That is medicine for the

mind, body, and their interaction. My interest began in my early recovery, when I was trying to find spiritual truths or

knowledge similar to the author of this article. I heard somewhere that the older we grow, the more spirituality we

have to add to our experience. As the Chicagoland Methodist Senior Services says, “Sometimes, as we get older,

we have more time available to us to reflect on our spiritual outlook, and this can be the ideal phase of life to get in

touch with our spiritual sides.”

The author makes a clear point that we cannot ourselves change life from happening. However, he points out that

by changing our response to life or by using “indirect methods,” we can make a difference in life’s outcome. Another

good point the writer makes is between mindfulness and relaxation. These two devices have their place by helping

us through our challenging experiences. I agree with his point that addressing experiences through mindfulness is

more open and often the most effective.

It pleased me to hear that practicing acceptance was something that was a pivotal experience in his recovery. As

part of the 1st step in all of the many 12-step programs I attend, acceptance is key. As they say in the rooms of re-

covery, “acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person,

place, thing or situation -- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that

person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment..” The author also

mentions self-acceptance came easier by avoiding critical thinking and surrendering to the present moment.

I agreed with the writer in his point of a “beginning of transformation” including not focusing on the “problem.” I

learned this truth early in recovery by practicing solution-based recovery concepts. However, one experiential physi-

ological revelation I had when recording music once helped me find a solution to many of my life’s troubles. I was

wrestling through guitar chords and I found a way to work smarter; in all these tangled chords, I found a solution.

Not focusing on the problem was my solution. To explain, when I had multiple guitar cables tangled up, if I was to

pull and tug on one end, then it would just end up tighter and more knotted. Yet when I focused on the looser knots

on the outside I was able to pull the cable through easily! This was my revelation. Energy goes where attention

flows. Focus on the solution!

It was riveting to hear that the author recognized in himself, “the meaning I give to my condition matters.” He found

many concepts that are offered in various groups such as strength in realistic thinking, surrender, acceptance, non-

judgement, and most of all he had found a easier, softer way.

THINGS TO KNOW

Page 7

Non-Profit Organization

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West Palm Beach, FL

Permit No. 1327

National Alliance on Mental Illness of Palm Beach County

Mollie Wilmot Center—Palm Healthcare Pavilion

5205 Greenwood Avenue, Suite 110

West Palm Beach, FL 33407

Or Current Resident

NAMI Membership exists at 3 levels: Affiliate, State & National. NAMI is a 501(c)(3) non -profit, charitable organization—contributions are tax-deductible to the fullest extent allowed by law.

Together, we can continue to fight for all those affected by mental illness. PLEASE NOTE: In

order for NAMI/PBC to receive your full donation, please send your donation to the NAMI/

PBC office. Thank you!

Contributions benefit NAMI|PBC, a not for profit tax exempt organization. A COPY OF

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(CH 6498), MAY BE OBTAINED FROM THE DIVISION OF CONSUMER SER-

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Members are NAMI/PBC’s lifeblood; your member-ship helps us continue to

provide free outreach, support & education. In bringing mental health

issues to wider attention, we advocate for better

treatment. As our mem-bership base grows, our voice becomes stronger.

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