STORIES THAT HEAL

SILVER LININGS 2011 Davao CityHoney Abarquez, Murielle Esmeralda, Joy Delgra, FeMonique Musni, Angel Libron

Values in HealthcareA Spiritual ApproachThe Janki Foundation For Global Health Care

L I S T E N I N G

Seven Tools of Learning that allows one to engage inner exploration and apply their insights to a wide range of situations and problems

MEDITATIONVISUALIZATIONREFLECTIONLISTENINGAPPRECIATIONCREATIVITYPLAY

ListeningListening is an essential skill in healthcare.

The quality of how we listen can bring benefit not only to those being listened to, but also to the listener themselves.

Listening as a spiritual tool involves participants in deep listening and requires that the listener finds inner peacefulness, so that they can give their full attention, focusing on what the person is saying with an open heart and without judgment.

• Honey Abarquez, TRANSITIONS• Elizabeth Denise, TRIBUTE TO A GREAT MOM andMY LIFE CANCER

• Joy Delgra, MY EXPERIENCE WITH CANCER• Fe Monique “Nikki,” Musni,THE BABSOY AND MOMMY SHOW

• Angel Libron, SULAT PARA KAY MAMA• Honey Abarquez, COPING WITH CANCER

• Competence and compassion are two important aspects of good healthcare

• Compassion is a value that is central to all healthcare.– Kindness– Patience– Generosity– Respect and understanding– It is unconditional love.

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Values in HealthcareValues in Healthcare, Leeds University for Janki Foundation

Healthcare professionals

• We can sympathize and empathize and We can sympathize and empathize and be caring without being left exhausted.be caring without being left exhausted.

• Showing sympathy towards another person’s suffering is acknowledging their suffering, – ““I am sorry that you have broken your arm.”I am sorry that you have broken your arm.”

(Recognizing that they are suffering without really engaging at a feeling level.)

EmpathyEmpathy

• Literally we share a feeling with Literally we share a feeling with someone, we “walk in their shoes”,someone, we “walk in their shoes”,– ““I feel really upset that you are so depressed I feel really upset that you are so depressed

about losing your job.” about losing your job.” • Comforting the person we are Comforting the person we are

empathizing with, but the comfort to them empathizing with, but the comfort to them maybe at our expense and leave us feeling maybe at our expense and leave us feeling drained. drained.

• If we identify too closely with them, it can If we identify too closely with them, it can also make it difficult for us to help them.also make it difficult for us to help them.

Inter pathyInter pathy

• An expansion of empathy where we relate An expansion of empathy where we relate to another’s suffering although we may not to another’s suffering although we may not understand why they are suffering. understand why they are suffering.

• This may be because they are from a This may be because they are from a different culture or because their feelings different culture or because their feelings may seem inappropriate given the situation, may seem inappropriate given the situation, but we are curious and we try to but we are curious and we try to understand. understand.

• In doing so we reach a point of contact that In doing so we reach a point of contact that is therapeutic in itself.is therapeutic in itself.

• Sympathy Empathy InterpathySympathy Empathy Interpathy• It is more and it is less.It is more and it is less.

– We acknowledge a patient’s illness, we sense We acknowledge a patient’s illness, we sense how they feel, we try to understand how it how they feel, we try to understand how it affects them, yet with compassion we do not affects them, yet with compassion we do not become emotionally involved. become emotionally involved.

– We are engaged yet detached. We are engaged yet detached. – We are standing back and looking on with We are standing back and looking on with

kindness. By showing compassion in this way kindness. By showing compassion in this way in the healthcare setting, it allows us to be in the healthcare setting, it allows us to be compassionate without suffering from compassionate without suffering from “compassion fatigue” or “burnout”. “compassion fatigue” or “burnout”.

– We can do this by developing the skill of We can do this by developing the skill of compassionate listening.compassionate listening.

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compassionate listeningcompassionate listening• Being peacefulBeing peaceful• Being attentiveBeing attentive• Listening with our heartListening with our heart

– Compassionate listening is when, besides being Compassionate listening is when, besides being peacful and attentive, we can listen with our peacful and attentive, we can listen with our hearts, we can feel open, generous and loving.hearts, we can feel open, generous and loving.

• We are detached emotionally while keeping that We are detached emotionally while keeping that spiritual connection. Detachment based on on love spiritual connection. Detachment based on on love and understanding.and understanding.

• It is crucial to stand back from a situation in order to It is crucial to stand back from a situation in order to view it objectively and constructively, and therefore view it objectively and constructively, and therefore be better able to support people.be better able to support people.

Skill of compassionate Skill of compassionate listeninglistening

• Focus on our own inner stillnessFocus on our own inner stillness– Through practice of breathing or meditationThrough practice of breathing or meditation

• Expand our awareness to a space of infinite Expand our awareness to a space of infinite peacefulnesspeacefulness– We are each like a point of light and this greater We are each like a point of light and this greater

awareness is like and ocean of light. The ocean of awareness is like and ocean of light. The ocean of light can be a source of peace, calm and light can be a source of peace, calm and compassion, which we can use to replenish compassion, which we can use to replenish ourselves and then direct to our patients.ourselves and then direct to our patients.

– This feeling or vibration of compassion passes This feeling or vibration of compassion passes through us rather than coming from us.through us rather than coming from us.

– This is the key to compassionate listening and This is the key to compassionate listening and will help us from feeling drained.will help us from feeling drained.

Compassionate listeningCompassionate listening

• Allows the person to tell their story in their Allows the person to tell their story in their own way and allowing them to feel own way and allowing them to feel understood.understood.– It is like listening to a child with attention to It is like listening to a child with attention to

their concerns a loving understanding that their concerns a loving understanding that support them as individuals.support them as individuals.

– We are not analyzing what the person is We are not analyzing what the person is saying but just being alongside them.saying but just being alongside them.

Compassion is the nonjudgmental Compassion is the nonjudgmental and unconditional aspect of loveand unconditional aspect of love

Love is not simply a desire,a passion, an intense feeling for one person or object, but a consciousness, which is simultaneously selfless, and self fulfilling. Love can be for one’s country, for a cherished aim, for truth for justice, for ethics, for people, for nature, for service, and for God.Love flows from truth, that is wisdom.Love based on wisdom is real love, not blind love; and to discover the secrets of of love is to watch the secrets of life unfold.

The basis of real love between people is spiritual. To see another as a spiritual being, a soul, is to see the spiritual reality of the other. To be conscious of that reality is to have spiritual love ; each person, complete within, independent yet totally interconnected, recognizes that state in the other

From Visible to Invisible Power

Generosity brings happiness at every stage of its expression

We experience joy in forming the intention to be generous

We experience joy in the actual act of giving something. And we experience joy in remembering the fact that we have given

The BUDDHA

Meditation on Compassion• Sit comfortably and relax. Become aware of your feet on the ground. Feel the connection to

the earth. Allow the muscles of your shoulders and neck to relax . . . Allow the tension to dissolve and move down into the ground.

• Let the muscle of your arms feel clasm and relaxed . . . Next your legs. . .now your face.• Now focus your attention on your breathing . . . Let it find its own clam rhythm . . . Breathe

in peace and breathe out any negative feelings . . . Gently breathe in peacefulness and calm.• Allow your mind to slow down . . . Try to watch your thoughts. . . Do not judge them as good

or bad . . . They are just thoughts . . .acknowledge them and let them go . . They are like clouds in the sky that you can watch drifting past. Beyond the clouds is the deep blueness of the sky . . . Feel that deep calm of the blue sky.

• Now focus on your inner calm . . . That place that is deep within yourself . . . That is peaceful