Spring 2003

FFloridalorida VVoiceoiceA publication of the Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence

The Florida CoalitionAgainst Domestic

Violence is agrassroots nonprofitorganization whose

membership iscomprised of

individuals, shelters,and advocacy groupssharing the goal of

eliminating domesticviolence.

Contents1.....Executive Director’s Report3.....Spotlight on Salvation Army Domestic Violence Program of West Pasco4.....Rural Caucus Updates5.....Hispanic/Latin Caucus News6.....Advanced Issues Workshop on Religion and Domestic Violence Opens Eyes7...Improving Domestic Violence Outreach and Services for Muslim Women8......Region II Training9.....Welfare, Work, & DV10...Survivor Poetry12...Creative Counseling

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR’S REPORT

Military and Political Leaders Take Action to Save Lives in the Aftermath of FortBragg Homicides

by: Tiffany Carr, Executive Director, FCADV

In the summer of 2002, four soldiers who were stationed at the Fort Bragg Armybase in North Carolina killed their spouses within a six week period. In the fifthand final homicide occurring during this period, it was the non-military spousewho allegedly killed her military husband. These homicides brought to theforefront an awareness of domestic violence issues within the U.S. military. The

relationship stresses associated with military service, particularly when the military personnel areplaced into combat situations, became a topic of national discussion and legislative debate.

In response to the tragic deaths of Teresa Nieves, Jennifer Wright, Andrea Floyd, Marilyn Griffin, andMajor David Shannon at Fort Bragg, Congressman Robin Hayes, who represents Fayetteville, NorthCarolina, including the area encompassing Fort Bragg, sponsored the Armed Forces Domestic SecurityAct (HB 5590). This legislation, which was signed into law on December 2nd, 2002, closed a loopholethat previously prohibited the enforcement of civilian orders of protection on military land. Thislegislation passed in record time and took effect immediately upon being signed into law.

Florida is home to three Army installations, thirteen Naval installations, eighteen Air Force installations,and one Marine Corps installation. These include Reserves centers and medical centers as well asactive military bases. Because Florida is a state with many military installations, it is important fordomestic violence centers to reach out to military installations within their service areas in order toeducate military leaders, personnel, and families about this change in legislation. In addition to theneed to educate military leaders, judges must also be informed of these changes so that they, too, canresponsibly address issues of domestic violence when one or both of the parties is a member of themilitary.

Military leaders at the Department of Defense are currently looking into improving the military’s responseto domestic violence among its ranks. In response to the murders, the Army conducted multipleinvestigations in August and September. The Fort Bragg Epidemiological Consultation Report(EPICON Report) outlines the findings and includes recommendations on how to improve the Army’sresponse to domestic violence at Fort Bragg and elsewhere. The EPICON Report recommendationsinclude examining more closely the effects of the military lifestyle on family relationships, as well asretooling its behavioral health practices to emphasize prevention of mental health problems beforethey become harmful. The EPICON Report found that the Army’s “flawed model for behavioral healthservices” contributed to the homicides. Although there was “known marital distress” in all cases, thereis no record of the soldiers accessing the military’s counseling services, states the report. Interviewsand focus groups revealed that soldiers, their spouses, and others believe that seeking services “isdetrimental and often terminal, either directly of indirectly, to a soldier’s career.” The report says the

Continued on Page 2

Page 2

FCADV 2002–2003BOARD MEMBERS

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE

Venita Garvin Valdez, PresidentDomestic Abuse Shelter

Ellen Siler, First Vice PresidentHubbard House

Linda Osmundson, Second Vice PresidentCASA

Theresa Harrison, Recording SecretaryPeaceful Paths

Christine Thrower, TreasurerWomen In Distress of Broward County, Inc.

Robert E. Schroeder, Past PresidentMetro-Dade Advocates for Victims

Caucus RepresentativesBattered/Formerly Battered Women Representative

Lillie Henderson, Safe House of Seminole

Child Advocate RepresentativeJulie Tindall, Harbor House

Lesbian and Bisexual Womyn’s RepresentativeHazel Hastings, Orlando, Florida

Women o f Color RepresentativeClarissa Hersey, CASA

Rural RepresentativeAngie Osterhoudt, Another Way

Hispanic/Latin RepresentativeMarlene Rivera, Lake Worth, Florida

Regional RepresentativesRegion I

Sue Hand, Favor House of NW Florida

Region IIJoyce Mahr, Safety Shelter of St. Johns County

Region IIILaurel Lynch, Hope Family Services

Region IVCindy Flachmeier, Salvation Army DV Center

Members–At–LargeJoyce Smalling, The Haven of R.C.S.

M.F. Warren, Domestic Abuse Council

Kelly Otte, Refuge House

Michele Anderson, Salvation Army DomesticViolence Program of West Pasco

We appreciate your commitment to FCADV!

Army’s current model of delivering services for domestic violence is“counterproductive” because current attitudes discourage “early identification andtherapeutic engagement.” The report also urges the military to “reengineer” its existingsystem to provide domestic violence services and other counseling to soldiers andtheir families. “Soldiers and families need earlier, more accessible, and career-safebehavioral health (BH) care,” states the EPICON Report, which outlines the currentfailures of the existing programs. As currently configured, the BH programs “do notpractice basic public health or preventive medicine principles,” according to the report.In addition to making BH programs more accessible to soldiers and their families, theEPICON Report recommends implementing “effective primary prevention” programssuch as screening for domestic violence and other BH problems, developing a systemfor systemic and integrated BH data collection and analysis, creating integrated servicesthat address a range of BH issues and providing BH care for soldiers’ spouses andchildren on the base.

In light of the findings of this report, it should be a priority of domestic violence advocatesto educate the military on domestic violence issues in general, not just on the injunctionfor protection legislation. This report suggests that the military is using a medicalmodel to explain and treat domestic violence, rather than using an empowerment modeland holding the abuser accountable for his own actions. The EPICON Report referencesthe effects of the military lifestyle on family relationships and suggests that the stressesfaced by military personnel contribute to relationship violence. However, it does nottake into account the fact that thousands of members of the military are living under thesame conditions, including combat conditions, as the soldiers who committed thesehomicides, and that these individuals have chosen not to take their stresses out on theirsignificant others. Domestic violence is a conscious choice that the vast majority ofmilitary personnel have chosen not to make. Military leaders must be aware that beingin combat does not create an abuser. Nor does being separated from a spouse for longperiods of time. While these issues may exacerbate abusive behaviors that are alreadypresent, they do not cause these behaviors. The first step for addressing domesticviolence within the military should include holding abusers accountable for their actionsand not allowing excuses that remove personal fault. We must ensure that outreach andeducation for military personnel explains that the stresses of the military lifestyle cannot and should not be used as an excuse for unacceptable abusive behaviors.

Despite the need for additional education on domestic violence for members of themilitary, it is important to note that Congress and the Department of Defense have actedswiftly to improve protections against domestic violence on military installations, andthey should be recognized for their actions in response to these tragedies. This is apositive step in working to protect against abuse within our nation’s military. We mustall work together to ensure that families are kept safe and free from violence.

Continued from Page 1

Spring 2003

To learn more about the military response to domestic violence and about HB 5590,please visit the following web links:

• Department of Defense Domestic Violence Task Force: http://www.dtic.mil/domesticviolence/.• EPICON Report: http://www.bragg.army.mil/.• HB 5590:

http://frwebgate.access.gpo.gov/cgi-bin/getdoc.cgi?dbname=107_cong_public_laws&docid=f:publ311.107.pdf

Spotlight on Salvation Army Domestic Violence Program of West PascoImproving Services Through the Enhancement of Program Services and Community Collaboration

by: Michele Anderson, Executive Director, Salvation Army Domestic Violence Program of West Pasco

Greetings from the Salvation Army Domestic ViolenceProgram of West Pasco. I would like to take thisopportunity to showcase some of what our program hasbeen doing in our community and within our agency.Because we are constantly striving for improvement withinour agency and in our community, we have been engagedin a variety of activities to increase the capacity of ouremployees to serve our community.

First and foremost among our improvement efforts, we arepleased to announce that we have recently hired a newChildren’s Counselor, Diane Freeman, who was well worththe wait of the few months it took to find the right advocate.Diane comes to us with many years of experience as aschoolteacher, having taught math and science in a varietyof grades. She has also worked as a Site Supervisor forfive summers, employed by Pasco County Parks andRecreation. As an involved parent with four children ofher own, Diane adds coaching sports teams, fundraising,and Student Council Advisor to her credits. Diane hasscheduled “family game night” for Sunday evenings toencourage parent involvement and interaction, kickball onTuesday afternoons, DV group sessions on Wednesdayevenings, and movie time on Thursdays. Other activitieswill include a scavenger hunt and other activities designedto engage the children and provide positive interaction. Wehave also been asked by the Pasco County Sheriff’s OfficeChild Protective Investigators to speak to them about theeffects of abuse on children, as well as Florida’s domesticviolence confidentiality statute as it pertains to shelters anddomestic violence programs.

In other news, we have also implemented a new programto augment our shelter services. Our follow up-counselingservices, offered by our Crisis Intervention Counselor,Ayleen Glenn, include individual counseling sessions andgroup therapy that are available to women who have leftthe shelter. In addition to our new program additions, weare also continuing our efforts to improve our capacity byensuring that our staff receive training that will aid them inbetter serving our clients. Advocates from the domestic

violence shelter and our outreach office have recentlyattended the Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence’sTANF Train the Trainer to become better acquainted withFlorida’s Welfare Transition program and the FamilyViolence Option(s) available to survivors of domesticviolence, and they are in the process of setting up trainingsessions for our local One-Stop centers that will both impartinformation and assist in improving our relationship withthem. In keeping with our efforts to boost communitycollaboration, we have also recently sent two staff membersfrom our program, who attended along with an employeeof the Pasco County Department of Health, to theDepartment of Health/FCADV training on March 7th. Wefeel this is a great opportunity to increase our collaborationwith the local health department and to improve screeningguidelines. We already partner with the local healthdepartment to work on gathering and streamlininginformation for posters and fliers that target issues ofworkplace violence, dating violence, and, among otherprojects, educating local religious groups in our communityabout the issues surrounding domestic violence. To thatend, we also recently held a training with the West PascoMinisterial Group, which is our first training for the religiouscommunity here.

It is our hope that, with improved programming andenhanced community collaboration, we can better reachout to and serve our community. We also hope to learn allthat we can from other agencies providing domesticviolence services, as well as to share our knowledge andexpertise with others.

To contact the Salvation Army Domestic Violence Programof West Pasco County, you can call our administrative officeat (727)856-6498.

To speak with a hotline counselor, you may call 1-800-500-1119 or call the Salvation Army Domestic ViolenceProgram of West Pasco directly at (727)856-5797.

Page 3Florida Voice

The Rural Caucus of the Florida Coalition Against DomesticViolence sponsored its first advanced training institute inconjunction with its Annual Retreat in February. They wereboth well-attended, with representation from all parts ofthe state. Post-event feedback and evaluations were verypositive. Highlights of the institute’s agenda were twoexcellent and dynamic speakers: Chris DelMarco,Domestic Violence Staff Attorney for Legal Services ofNorth Florida, first updated us on the latest changes to theinjunction process. She was followed by Meg Baldwin,Associate Professor at Florida State University, who spokeon the complicated dynamics of women and prostitution.We learned a lot, had lively discussions, and trulyappreciated the knowledge and experience both womenshared.

The retreat was a conglomeration of fun, rejuvenation,learning, and networking. There were classes on the

connection between domestic violence and animal abuseand the effects of domestic violence on children. Art therapyand massage therapy sessions helped to remind everyoneto take time to care for themselves.Another first for this year’s gathering was the presentationof the Outstanding Rural Advocate Award. The Caucusvoted to have this annual award to recognize and honorone of their own. Several worthy advocates were nominatedand received recognition. The first rural advocate to receivethis coveted award was Tarcila Pimentel from The Springof Tampa Bay. Congratulations to all of the nominees andmany, many thanks for all you do!

I want to take this opportunity to express my sincereappreciation at having the Outstanding Advocate Awardnamed in my honor. I am still in shock and do not knowhow to adequately express my appreciation. Thank you!!!

Left: Rural advocate Tarcila Pimentel receives the Donna HansellOutstanding Rural Advocate Award.

The mission of the Rural Caucus of theFlorida Coalition Against DomesticViolence is to help to overcome thebarriers which are unique to rurul victimsof domestic violence as a crucial stepin ending the violence.

RRURAL CCAUCUS UUPDATES

by: Donna M. Hansell, Rural Caucus Chairperson

Page 4 Spring 2003

The Hispanic/Latin Caucus of the Florida Coalition AgainstDomestic Violence has made several changes over the pastyear that have brought growth and collaboration among itsmembership. Changes that were initiated last fiscal yearinclude:

Becoming an open, bi-lingual caucusHosts of quarterly meetings will provide lunch and

a presentation of a Hispanic/Latin culture during lunch timeto facilitate learning about one another’s cultures.

Publishing a NewsletterAnd forming the following three committees:

Education and TrainingMaria Jose Fletcher, Committee ChairThe committee will be developing a directory of Spanishspeaking advocates and others who work with domesticviolence victims and who provide workshops/trainings ona specific topic. Maria Bermudez is accepting Spanishlanguage literature from any agency.

NewsletterEvelyn Herrera-Jackson, Committee ChairThe newsletter will be published quartely in Bi-lingualeditions. The first edition was published December 2002.

MembershipSylvia Garcia, Committee ChairAny person who works for an agency which is a memberof FCADV is welcome to join the Hispanic/Latin Caucuswithout charge. Anyone else must pay an annual fee of$25.00. (FCADV dues are payable July 1st. Annual

membership applications will be due in July of each year.

Before last year, the Hispanic/Latin Caucus was closed tothose who were not Hispanic/Latin themselves. Thedecision to make the caucus an open one was made sothat other advocates who regularly work with Hispanic/Latin clients would be included in the work the Caucus isdoing. The Caucus is focusing its efforts on improvingoutreach to Hispanic/Latin women through a variety ofmethods, starting with the advocates who spend the mosttime with this population and work in the communities whereoutreach is needed.

If you are interested in Hispanic/Latin Caucus membership,you may contact Brandi Skipalis at the Florida CoalitionAgainst Domestic Violence at (850)425-2749 or CaucusChairperson, Marlene Rivera, at (561)433-0060.

The next Hispanic Caucus meeting, with the theme “FamilyOriented,” will take place in Key West, Florida on June 6,2003 at The Wesley House Family Services. ContactMarlene Rivera (information above) for details.

Mission Statement

We exist to embrace our Hispanic/Latin Culture, andto promote the development and empowerment of asupport Network for anyone providing services toHispanic/Latin victims of domestic violence.

Left: The logo of the Florida Coalition Against Domestic ViolenceHispanic/Latin Caucus

Designed during the 2002-2003 fiscal year by Joe Neeley of New PortRichey, this logo is representative of many things that members of theCaucus deemed to be a part of being Hispanic/Latin in Florida. TheHispanic/Latin Caucus is the first FCADV caucus to have its own logo.

Page 5Florida Voice

HHISPANIC/L/LATIN CCAUCUS NNEWS

PPROFESSIONAL TTRAINING

Information about FCADV conferences and trainings is updated regularly on the FCADV website. To view the most up-to-date training and conference information, please visit http://www.fcadv.org/training.html.

If your organization has an upcoming training or conference that you wish to include in the FCADV newsletter or on theFCADV website, please submit the information to Brandi Skipalis at FCADV by e-mail at skipalis_brandi@fcadv.org, byfax at (850)425-3091, or mail to: FCADV

425 Office Plaza Dr.Tallahassee, FL 32301

Page 6

On February 5th and 6th, 2003, FCADV hosted an Advanced Issues Workshop on Religion and Domestic Violence inOrlando, Florida. Featured presenters included Kate Bartram of Women In Distress, Kay Tvaroch of CARE, PatriciaRobinson of CASA, Leo Mesa of Healing Hearts Family Center, Lou Reed of West Side Baptist Church, Ray Rufo ofTrinity International University, Sharifa Alkhateeb of Peaceful Families Project and Michelle Kaplan of Jewish Family andCareer Services. Each presenter was well versed, sharing a wealth of information on such topics as identifying domesticviolence, different cultural responses to abuse, and exploring terminology and scripture relevant to spousal abuse.

Presenter Sharifa Alkhateeb of Great Falls, Virginia was the highlight of the two-day workshop. Ms. Alkhateeb is theCreator and Director of the Peaceful Families Project where she is an educational consultant, intercultural trainer, andexpert of Middle Eastern, Arab, Muslim culture and people, and on issues of women and abuse in Islam. Ms. Alkhateeb’spresentation focused on the Muslim culture and the origins of Islam, specifically, what is known as the five pillars of Islam.She also spoke about the difficulties of reaching Muslim women who are being battered and how to provide assistance toMuslim women when community support is sought out. Participants of the workshop were delighted at Ms. Alkhateeb’sincredibly informative and even candid colloquy. In fact, the audience was so engaged, when her time was coming to anend, the participants ask for an extension of the presentation.

Religion and domestic violence is somewhat of a taboo subject, afraid to be broached by many. The information shared atthis workshop was nothing short of astonishingly eye opening. It not only gave a glimpse of what life is like for spirituallybattered women of different cultures, it also provided us with the most valuable information of all…what to do when weencounter a spiritually battered woman. FCADV would like to extend a warm thank you to all of those who presented aswell as attended!

Advanced Issues Workshop on Religion and Domestic Violence Opens Eyes

If you would like to write an article or an editorial for the Florida Voice, please contact Brandi Skipalis at (850)425–2749. We welcome any articles pertaining to Domestic Violence and the issues associated with it. Articles may besubmitted via mail or fax, or if you would like to submit an article by e–mail you may send it to skipalis_brandi@fcadv.orgno later than July 1st, 2003. (Note: E-mail is preferred)Please send articles to: FCADV

425 Office Plaza Dr.Tallahassee, FL 32301Fax: (850)425-3091

REQUEST FOR ARTICLES AND EDITORIALS

Spring 2003

SSPECIAL PPROJECTS

Improving Domestic Violence Outreach and Services for Muslim Womenby: Brandi Skipalis, Special Projects Coordinator, FCADV

The Muslim population of North America is a small butgrowing group that consists of individuals whose familieshave been practicing Islam for centuries as well as thosewho have only recently converted to Islam. Of the eight toten million Muslims in America, more than half are African-American, a small but growing number are EuropeanAmerican, and the rest are immigrants (first, second, orthird generation) from Middle Eastern, Southwest Asian,and other countries.

Sharifa Alkhateeb, who was a featured speaker atFCADV’s Advanced Institute on Religion and DomesticViolence (see article, page 8), discusses in her article,“Ending Domestic Violence in Muslim Families”, a surveythat was done by the North American Council for MuslimWomen. According to the survey of 63 Muslim communityworkers, leaders, and individuals done in 1993..., domesticviolence (including everything from hitting to incest) againstMuslim women and children occurred in ten percent of thepopulation of Muslims. If verbal and psychological abusewere added to this, the figure would rise considerably.Alkhateeb also points out that “when an incidence of abuseor violence is reported to someone in the Muslimcommunity, the general response is to avoid ‘interfering’ infamily affairs.”

On July 4-6, 2003, the Islamic Society of North America(ISNA) will be hosting its Third Annual Muslims AgainstDomestic Violence Conference to encourage religious

and community leaders to hold abusers accountable fortheir behavior and to work to assist the victim of the abuse.The Florida Department of Children and Families Officeof Refugee Services is partnering with the Florida CoalitionAgainst Domestic Violence to send several domesticviolence advocates and refugee service providers fromFlorida to the Conference in Austin, Texas. This conferencewill explore the issue of domestic violence in the Muslimcommunity in North America. It seeks to bring togetheractivists, Imams (Muslim spiritual leaders), communityleaders, and scholars to formulate an action plan to resolvethe issue of domestic violence in Muslim families. As partof this action plan, the ISNA hopes to:• Establish national protocols via collaborative efforts of

activists, clinicians, para-professionals to further guidethe efforts to eliminate domestic violence, and to

• Promote and/or develop literature addressing domesticviolence in Muslim communities.

The ISNA is committed to addressing the issues associatedwith domestic violence within Muslim families, and theirwebsite includes a forum for domestic violence issues thatincludes, among other things, scholarly input regarding whatMuslim Holy texts say regarding domestic violence. Thisforum can be found at http://www.isna.net/dv/.

You may register for the ISNA conference online at theISNA website, http://www.isna.net.

Page 7Florida Voice

What does the Quran say about Domestic Violence and Marriage in Islam? Both Ms. Alkhateeb and Dr. M. Basheer Ahmed, whose work is also featured on the ISNA’s DV Forum, cite ten versesfrom the Quran that provide specific guidance and direction regarding marital relations and domestic violence. Alkhateebwrites, “Under no circumstances is violence against women encouraged or allowed. The holy Qur’an contains tens ofverses extolling good treatment of women. Several specifically enjoin kindness to women (2:229-237; 4:19; 4:25). Theseverses make it clear that the relationship between men and women is to be one of kindness, mutual respect, and caring.Some verses, where Allah calls men and women “protecting friends of one another,” refer to the mandated atmosphere ofmutual kindness and mercy in the marital home (30:21; 9:71). Others show disapproval of oppression or ill treatment ofwomen….”. Sura 4 Ayat 19 of the Quran states: “O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will.Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may Take away part of the dower ye have given them, except where theyhave been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike tothem it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.”

RREGION II TII TRAINING

Page 8

Immigration Issues and Domestic Violence

How Can We Better Serve Immigrant Women???

Topics will include Legal needs of Battered Immigrant Women, Self-Petitions, VAWA (ViolenceAgainst Women Act) and more…

A Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence (FCADV) Region II Training

When: June 13th, 2003Time: 9 a.m. – 3:00 p.m.Where: Halifax Plantation Clubhouse, 3400 Clubhouse Dr., OrmondBeach, FloridaThe Trainer: Ms. Maria-Jose Fletcher

Ms. Maria-Jose Fletcher is the Supervising Attorney at Florida Immigrant Advocacy Center inMiami, Florida . Ms. Fletcher is also the Director of LUCHA: A Women’s Legal Project.

Cost of Training: The cost if the training is $20.00 per person. Lunch will be provided.Please attach checks. Reservations must be pre-paid. Make checks payable to the “Family LifeCenter” and send to Family Life Center, P.O. Box 2058, Bunnell, Florida 32110.

For more information, contact Wanda Phillips (386) 437-7610

Name(s)___________________________________________________________________

Address____________________________________________________________________

Agency________________________Ph. #__________________________

E-mail_________________________# Attending Event_______________

Spring 2003

Page 9Florida Voice

The University of Michigan School of Social Work Project for Research on Welfare, Work, & Domestic Violence Presents:The 4th Annual Trapped by Poverty/Trapped by Abuse Conference

Friday, October 17th, 2003 through Sunday, October 19th, 2003Radisson Hotel and Suites, Austin Texas

Sponsored by: The Center for Impact Research; The University of Michigan School of Social Work; The University of TexasSchool of Social Work; and the Institute on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault

Advocates, policy makers, welfare department staff, service providers, and researchers are invited to takeadvantage of this opportunity to:

Share information about the relationship of domestic violence, work, welfare, and povertyLearn about new research dataDiscuss innovative service delivery approachesDetermine policy implicationsShape the agenda for future research

The Project for Research on Welfare, Work and Domestic Violence seeks to foster collaboration amongindividuals and organizations concerned with the nexus of welfare and domestic violence issues.

A presentation of the first Sheila and Paul Wellstone Award for Advocacy in Work, Welfare, and DomesticViolence will be presented on Friday, October 17th, 2003, followed by Keynote speaker Senator Patty Murray,(D) Washington.

Included for your review is a sampler of concurrent Panel topics (Full and detailed schedule will be posted on July1, 2003. Check the conference web site http://www.ssw.umich.edu/trapped/conference.html).

Domestic violence in the longitudinal Fragile Families and Child Well-being Survey and it’s effects on family formationDomestic violence, work and welfare policy: Reports from the Three City StudyFamily Violence Option implementation (Alabama, Missouri, New York, District of Columbia, Kansas, Philadelphia,Pennsylvania, Washington State, and Maryland).TANF department of actions and domestic violence: Applications and SanctionsThe role of General Assistance in helping violence victimsParental Conflict, domestic violence, and child support policiesPoverty, addiction, and domestic violence Welfare and employment learnings from longitudinal welfare tracking studies: Michigan, California, Texas, Ontario,CanadaNative American, immigrant, and rural women (Alaska, Wyoming, Kentucky)African-American women, domestic violence, and poverty Women, poverty, and domestic violence in Africa and Southeast AsiaDomestic Violence and housing: Public housing, Transitional housing, HomelessnessDomestic violence and teens: School attendance, Juvenile delinquencyIncarcerated women and domestic violenceInnovations: Integrating domestic violence interventions within job training programs

More information on the conference and a copy of the conference registration can be obtained bylogging on to the conference web site at http://www.ssw.umich.edu/trapped/conference.html.

WW

WELFARE,,

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WORK,,

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DOMESTIC

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VIOLENCE

Page 10

The Bruises Are Within

No one hits me anymore,but

The bruises…. are withinI struggle desperately to survive,

butStill… I never win

The bruises…. are within

My mind is not captive, yet my soul is not freeI just need a chance…. to heal you see

The bruises…. are within

My children are captive to scenes of uncertaintyWhile I work through these issues of abuseI know they need me to be whole you see

Although really I feel, I’m of no useThe bruises…. are within

Cause although I’m their strong Woman, MomMy life… secretly reveals I’m a fake

No matter how I look on the outside my friendMy mind… is the remains of an internal earthquake

The bruises…. are within

My children so tender, trusting, and caringDo not understand why their Mother has a hard time-sharing

Her truthsBut see….

The bruises …are within

You can’t live your life in a vacuum so easyThough you make a valiant try

What always happens is you end up hurtAnd then you got nowhere to cry

YetYou have to survive even though you think you don’t

God gave you a purpose, a mission a quoteGod gives you his grace, his love, and his hope

YesGod will eventually help you heal and then

The bruises…. will no longer be within

by: Joyce Brown © 2000

You can help stopDOMESTIC VIOLENCEby joining FCADV today!

Membership benefits include:*Updates on Public Policy & Legislative

Action*Networking with Individuals & Organiza-

tions Serving Victims*Quarterly Newsletters & Publications*Access to FCADV Resource Library*Discounts to Conferences & Training

Seminars

YES! Sign me up as... Individual Supporter

Enclosed is my gift of:

$25 $50 $100 $___ Associate Member

$50 for organizations endorsing the philosophy of FCADV.

Contributions are tax deductible as allowed by law.

_________________________________Name

_________________________________Organization

_________________________________Address

_________________________________City

_________________________________State/ZIP

_________________________________(Area Code) Phone/FAX

MC VISA Exp. Date / /

#______________________

_________________________________Name on Card

_________________________________Signature

Thank you for your support!

Please mail to: FCADV 425 Office Plaza Dr.

Tallahassee, FL 32301

SSSSSSURVIVORURVIVORURVIVORURVIVORURVIVOR P P P P PPOETRYOETRYOETRYOETRYOETRY

Spring 2003

Florida Voice Page 11

CCLIPPED WWINGSRaped and Left for Dead

by: Barbara M. Ivery © 2002

He was not really a friend of mineHe was a friend of a friend who was sweet and kind

I guess you can say he was an acquaintanceSo I let down my guard, and opened up my fence

And when I saw him as I was walking homeIn the dark of the night all alone

I was actually thankful that he was thereWhen he offered me a ride, I knew that he cared

So since I knew him I took his invitationAnd got into this man’s car without hesitation

We talked about school, the new movie that was showingYolanda Adams’ new CD, and the conversation kept flowingSuddenly I told him to slow down as he approached my exit

He told me to shut up and hit me in the face with his fistAt that second I knew I was in danger

And that this man I thought I knew was really a strangerI tried to open the door to jump to my fate

But he safety locked the doors so I could not escapeI yelled and pleaded with him to let me goBut he ignored me and called me a whoreI tried to pull his hair or scratch his face

I could barely breathe as I panicked and my heart racedHe drove the car down a rocky road into a wooded area

And I went into complete hysteriaI sensed he had taken other victims to this evil nestEither intimidating them or wearing his Sunday best

Then he slammed the car into parkAnd my heart stopped and started

I repeatedly yelled, “No, no, no, please!”As he put his hands all over me

He pulled my hands above my headAnd looked me straight into my eyes and said,

“You say no, but you mean yes!”Just then I felt totally helpless

He ripped off my dress, stopping to molest me with his eyesThat burned through my breast and glared down my thighs

No one knew where I was or whom I was withOr that second by second my honor was being sifted

His only weapon was his overpowering strengthTo which my weak fists were no defense

Had I been too nice to him,

Giving him the wrong impressionDid I ask for this deadly lesson

My world was turned upside downAnd spun wildly out of control

As he took from me the one thing thatWas more precious than silver or gold

The more I seemed to struggle against his willHe drew more excited and his eyes became blood filled

It was as if I was buried in a tombHis body pounding against mine destroying my wombHe tore down my innocence and invaded my temple

Unwrapping my sacred gift as I whined and wimpledThen he proceeded to infect and pollute my beautiful gardenLeaving his diseased oils attached to my heart without a pardon

He brutally touched the face of my essenceLeaving a permanent scar on my virtuous eloquence

He came into my precious love unwantedAnd robbed me of my honor with insults and tauntingThen he released its evil spirit into my once holy place

And I unwillingly received his demonsas I looked into his distorted face

His wicked body collapsed and he fell into a relieved relaxAnd I carved my fear into his broad back

He rolled off me smirking with a violent jerkAnd I lay quiet, ashamed, numb, and hurt

I lay crying on the cold, wet grass as a cool breeze blewMy mind now vague and unsure of what to do

I curled up still in a fetus positionMy mind, soul, heart, spirit, and body in distasteful condition

My intimacy was stabbed and ripped apartI could feel the wickedness dance down my inner walls

In a small corner of my mind in the back of my headI realized I had been raped and left for dead

Though it was over, I was not relievedBecause now we were one fleshThough I unwillingly did cleave

I cried, “O Lord, my sanctified shellHas been broken and my sweet gate has

Been unlocked, where will my babies live?”He said, “My child, I was wounded and bruised for you, and

By My stripes, you are now healed.”

According to the U.S. Department of Justice, a woman in America is raped every two minutes. Every womanthat is raped is going to have to learn how to feel and trust again. Until that time, she is a butterfly whose wingshave been clipped and can no longer fly. She is grounded, until her wings grow back with glorious color andstrength. And she takes flight, leaving behind the anger and hurt, but carrying her dignity and endurance.

Non–ProfitOrganizationU.S. Postage

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Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice is published quarterly to informsupporters, members, interested individuals, andorganizations of the activities of the Florida CoalitionAgainst Domestic Violence. Materials fromFlorida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice may be printed without permissionwith credit to Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice Florida Voice, a publication ofFCADV.

This publication was funded in part by a grantfrom the Florida Department of Children andFamilies.

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Art is healing. It works by conveying feeling, thoughts, and actions through an image. In each art work, the woman isunconsciously solving her life problems at a pre-symbolic level, in a canvas, where it is safe to try. Each picture offersalternatives, possibilities, and solutions. Art creates a safe space of encounter between the woman and her counselorwhere the art work and the artist’s interpretation take the lead. The counselor follows that lead to facilitate an insightthrough this creative process. The artwork is pretext to engage the woman in liberating dialogue that, by provoking affectand the integration of traumatic material to her vision of life and the world, eventually will lead to empowerment and self-knowledge.

Creative counseling is about the art of living. In living and in art-making, you always choose: color medium, canvas,paper...It also deals with relationships and contextual color alone is nothing. It is in relationship to the rest of the colorsthat they function, the same way that a word is understood in the context of a sentence or verse and music conveying afeeling and/or thought through melody itself. We can learn to deal with relationships through art and then transfer this skillto life. It also allows for non-verbal communication at moments when words become hard.

Art is a powerful form of expression and the exploration through art is a path for healing. It helps our clients at a deeperlevel by passing the mind and allowing access to unconscious memories that need to come to light in order to be assimilatedin the present world view of the survivor of domestic violence.

CREATIVE COUNSELINGby: Ivette M. Gómez

Reprinted from Volume 1, Issue 1 of La Connección,The Newsletter of the Hispanic/Latin Caucus of the Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence

Please refer to pages 10-11 to read Survivor Poetry, written by women in Florida about their experiences dealing with their own abuse.Poetry is just one of the many types of art through which survivors can express themselves. You can also view art painted by Floridaartist and domestic violence survivor MeloD at www.domesticviolenceseries.org.