Section 2

Negotiating is really about power and control over the negotiations and the other negotiators.

Whoever gains ownership of the dimensions of the negotiating, will achieve the power and

control. Processes are the tools that negotiators use combined with their own personal

strengths explored in section one, to gain control over negotiations. Each type of person will

rely on his own strengths to gain power and control during negotiating. Processes can be

referred to as the tactics of negotiating.

If the personal agendas of power and control could be factored out of negotiating, then

processes could be defined as all parties gaining a clear understanding of what each hopes

to accomplish and how best to achieve the results acceptable to each. So how do the

personality types factor in to the processes to be explored?

VERBALIZERS AND PROCESS

Verbalizers view process as somewhat of a hindrance and really do not like to be tied

down to systems or rules. The Verbalizer is so accustomed to using the strength of his

verbal and people skills that he sees little value in process. Verbalizers are highly skilled in

the intuitive and their confidence comes from their perceived ability to think quickly on their

feet and influence negotiating by their verbal skills. Their intuitiveness is the verbalizer’s

strength and the foundation of their creativeness. Verbalizers are emotional / emotional by Page 1 of 21

nature. Processes are logical in their purest form and therefore completely outside of the

verbalizers area of the known unless he makes an effort to learn and use them. This will not

be an easy task for a verbalizer but will pay huge dividends in negotiating if the vebalizer

chooses to improve his / her skills in this area. Process feels like repetition to the verbalizer.

Combining process with many details bores a verbalizer and seems to be a waste of time.

During negotiating, explaining process will tend to cause the Verbalizer to lose concentration

and interest in the negotiations because it is outside of his area of the known. The

verbalizer’s body language will show his discomfort when he begins to feel caught in

process.

The verbalizer can improve his negotiating strength and confidence by familiarizing himself

with the process. Even if they do not choose to use what seems to be dull, repetitious or

canned process, verbalizers will be prepared to recognize when others use them.

Understanding will greatly expand their comfort zone, confidence and ability to understand

others.

To negotiate with verbalizers recognize the processes you will use, set your agenda and

goals. Let the verbalizers talk as much as they want and act as a guide while keeping the

verbalizers on your track. Verbalizers feel processes are guidelines at best, real

understanding comes through talking and getting a feeling for the negotiations and the

desired results that please everyone.

Verbalizers depend on the strength of their intuitive ability and verbal skills to gain

control and power in negotiating.

CONVINCERS AND PROCESS

Convincers view process as something to learn carefully because process represents

a logical method of operation. This type recognizes that if he knows the rules or processes

well and has an opportunity to choose how and when they will be applied gains an

advantage. Convincers are likely to try to invent the process or change it to their advantage.

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Convincers are skilled at using logic to gain emotion control to overpower other negotiators.

Expect convincers to work hard to gain advantage in negotiating convincingly, methodically

and quickly. Convincers gain self-confidence through control of the process and the other

negotiators. Process is like a puzzle to be solved and convincers enjoy the gamesmanship of

negotiating.

Negotiating is the area of the known to convincers. Convincers think they are able to control

the boundaries of negotiating and the other negotiators. Convincers are so accustomed to

working and succeeding in this arena that they tend to become frustrated if results do not

come as quickly as they expect. Convincers do not like to be questioned about their methods

or goals. The smooth communication style of convincers can change quickly to aggressive or

abusive if they do not gain agreement to their negotiating plan.

Attempts at pressuring the convincer will make him become a more aggressive negotiator. In

order to be successful with a convincer never let him dominate the negotiations. Always think

through what your needs are and how you intend to negotiate. Clearly plan out your

boundaries and where you might compromise. Be prepared to firmly defend your boundaries

logically when the convincer challenges you. Pick processes that are comfortable to you and

take the initiative. You may find that mirroring the style of the convincer is necessary to gain

equity in the negotiating process. The convincer views process as the rules of negotiating.

Convincers believe and negotiate from a position that whoever is in charge of the rules will

win the negotiating. You must prove to a convincer that you intend to be a partner in the

negotiating process.

Convincers use their logical strength to emotionally gain power and control

negotiations.

RATIONALS AND PROCESS

Rationals are logical / logical by nature and therefore view the process as extremely

important. Rationals expect other negotiators to go by the rules exactly. The problem that

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arises is that the rational’s set of rules are based on his interpretation of what the rules are. It

is as important to understand the rules of negotiating as the negotiating process itself when

negotiating with the rational. Rationals can lose patients quickly with other negotiators who

do not clearly see the process exactly as they see it.

You must be prepared in advance to negotiate successfully with the Rational. The Rational

will require documentation and remember well what is said. Be sure to define in advance as

much about the negotiating process as possible with clear understanding of what is to be

accomplished and how. Discuss your boundary issues and the issues of the rational to

uncover areas of conflict and possible compromise. Be prepared to support your boundaries

and issues logically. If you think there is a problem area, explore solutions immediately.

Rationals will negotiate pieces of the process one at a time so that the final part of the

process is just a confirmation of the work already logically understood and agreed to by all

parties.

Rationals respect and expect directness, definition and as few words as possible. Focus on

logical methods and logical words. Rationals do not respond to emotional language well.

Emotion has no place in negotiating for a logical / logical. You will seldom talk a Rational

through negotiating. Pressuring the Rational will cause him to become inflexible on his

position.

Rationals logically think that the rules set the boundaries and that will determine the

outcome.

Rationals depend on their strength to develop and present so logically that they are

proven right in negotiating.

REASONABLES AND PROCESS

Reasonables view the process as important but others have pre-determined the

control of it. Reasonables will many times take the role of facilitator as opposed to lead

negotiator because either corporate or verbalizer boundaries are already in place to dictate

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the final results of the negotiating process. To negotiate successfully with a Reasonable, be

prepared to discuss details thoroughly and non-defensively. Also, be prepared to allow

adequate time for the reasonable to digest the facts or final agreement and get comfortable

with what it means to him. Pressuring a Reasonable will usually result in no decision at all

because if the pressure is to go outside his area of defined known; he cannot do it.

Reasonables operate inside a set of predetermined rules and will not venture outside.

Reasonables are governed by their emotional conviction to obey the logical rules and

boundaries set for them and negotiate inside their area of the known.

EXAMPLE

When confronted wit a problem, how do you think each of the types would begin formulating

a solution?

Verbalizer

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

Convincer

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

Rational

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

Reasonable

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

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How can you become better at managing processes by reviewing how each or the types

above manage process

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

ASKING GOOD QUESTIONS TO OBTAIN GOOD INFORMATION

When asking questions, there is a system to follow which will give you the information you

need for negotiating. Always write down the answers to questions as accurately as possible.

Write the answers. Tape recorders or even typing on a computer still makes most people

nervous and they stop answering. Decide what type of answer will meet your needs. If you

ask questions that can be answered with a yes or no you will not get much information. If

you ask open-end questions, an expanded answer will give you much more information and

some prospective of whom the other person is. Open-end questions begin with who, what

when, where, and how. Never ask questions that have no purpose. If you are working with

convincers or rationals, they will ask you why you are asking the questions. Be sure that you

understand the answer clearly. If you do not understand, ask for clarification or ask a

clarification question. When you ask questions, you will learn the type of people, you will be

negotiating with as well as their needs and boundaries. Identifying needs and boundaries

should be your objective. You should also have a clear understanding after clarification.

Remember, when you accumulate enough information, stop asking. You might finish by

asking if the other party or parities have any questions for you.

EXAMPLE

You go to a listing appointment. Should you begin presenting or asking questions? If you

begin by asking questions like. “What are your expectations of me if I list your home?”

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If you begin to present prior to asking you will be fortunate if you answer the questions the

client has. It is impossible to negotiate a listing contract if you know how to meet your needs

but have no idea as to the expectations of the prospective client.

Asking good questions

Ask open-end questions to gather information

Ask close-end questions to gain commitment

Never ask a question without a reason

Be sure you understand the answer to the question before moving on

If the question uncovers a potential problem, ask how the other party sees

resolving it

Write down the answers

Ask if the other party has any questions

Mark the answers emotional or logical

LISTENING TO OTHERS

All people types must develop listening skills. To listen effectively you cannot talk at the

same time. You also cannot listen effectively when you are thinking about potential solutions

while the other party is talking. You cannot listen to the needs of more than one person at a

time. It is a myth to think that a person can process more than one thought pattern at a time.

Listening involves elevating the person talking to the highest priority. You must eliminate all

other thoughts except what the other person is saying from your mind for that period of time.

EXAMPLE

Have you ever found yourself listening to someone and the person stops and says,

“Excuse me but you have not heard a word I have said”. In addition, you know that it is true.

Developing the skill to listen intensely to what someone else is saying is difficult. There are

some points that will cause the process of learning to listen.

Learning to listenPage 7 of 21

Keep your focus exclusively on the other party

Allow only one person to talk at a time

Try not to allow yourself to think about solutions while the other party is

talking

Paraphrase what you think you have heard

Ask if what you paraphrase is correct

Ask questions if you do not think or feel you have understood

Take notes if it is necessary for you to remember what is said

Be sure the background behind the talker is not distracting

Count to three after the talker has finished

Maintain eye contact when listening unless taking notes

Never interrupt

When it is your turn to respond

Be calm

Be aware of your tone of voice

Be aware of your language

Think and formulate your responses before you speak

Be direct and complete with your response

Clearly delineate one subject of response from another

Ask if you have provided an acceptable answer

See yourself as a partner in the solution and act like one

Use words like “we”

Be sure that if you take an adversarial role that you have a reason for

doing so

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DEFINING THE BOX

When all parties are prepared in advance for a negotiating session and have at least

identified some of their personal needs and boundaries, negotiations seldom change the

scenario greatly. Negotiations more often involve the process of defining the box in which

successful negotiating can occur. Good negotiators see the “box” as an abundance of

opportunities, which is why they enjoy and succeed in the negotiating process. Those who

see the box as very limiting with few options have a self imposed limited opportunity to

succeed.

The process of defining the box:

Ask questions

Listen

Offer

Negotiate

Defining the box is a very creative part of the negotiating process by its nature. Verbalizers

and convincers see the objective as expanding the box, rationals generally view defining the

box as proving where the boundaries are, and reasonables will explain where the walls of the

box are. In negotiating, the box is usually cluttered with lots of ideas, questions and

refinements but very few actual issues of importance to negotiate.

In real estate, some agents like to include as many items as possible in an offer. The logic of

this type of negotiating is to pack the offer with items that can be negotiated away without

influencing the actual needs represented by the offer. Each type will interpret an offer

structured in this manner differently.

Verbalizers will probably present each issue of the offer to his client as important and discuss

the merits of each one. The counter offer may be even more confusing that the offer to sort

through all the issues that seem to be important to both clients.

Convincers will present the offer in its entirety to their client and determine how to counter

with an offer that excludes and includes issues or wording that benefits his client. When a

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convincer offers or counter offers be sure to understand exactly what you are signing. Every

work or change means something and usually has a value or cost to you or your client.

Rationals will tend to assign a value to the issues and subtract the value from the offering

price and negotiate from the net value of the offer. Rationals do not care about the content of

the issues of the contract except for the impact on the cost. Rationals will usually agree to

the contact and focus strictly on the net cost effect. A counter from the rational will usually

have no changes except to the offering price. If you ask a rational how he has calculated the

change in price, he will be able to tell you exactly.

Reasonables will feel obligated to look at all the issues to be sure there are no objections. A

reasonable will likely evaluate each issue and except or delete bases on his boundaries.

If you use the issues by the “pound strategy for construction” of offers, it may work with some

of the people some of the time but also has the potential to overload certain types of people.

If you choose to use this strategy, read carefully any counter offer you receive and move as

quickly as possible to your desired results. Lots of counter offering back and forth using this

strategy can cause negotiations to fall apart.

NEGOTIATING THE EDGES

Negotiating the edges is the process of expanding or contracting boundaries of the box.

Convincers’ objective in negotiating the edges is to get more than they give. Rationals’ are

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shrewd takers and do not usually give on their important boundary issues. Reaonables do

not anticipate giving or taking. Verbalizers are more likely to give than take on edge issues.

Negotiating the edges involves a give and take of true information that does not compromise

the confidentiality of the agency agreement.

Statements you might make or receive from another agent are:

“I have been told by another (buyers) agent that he is writing an offer on the (sellers) property

(that I am representing)”.

“My (buyer) client is pre-qualified and living in an apartment”.

List some other statements you might hear or use when negotiating the edges.

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

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WORD PICTURES

The purpose of developing a word picture is to:

cause negotiators to define issues logically and emotionally in their own words

develop the logical and the emotional consequences of issues to be negotiated

assign value to the solution

feel urgency to implement the solution

Developing word pictures during the negotiating process causes negotiators to begin

intensifying the necessity of implementing a solution greater than themselves. When an issue

is defined logically, the emotional dimension fuels the momentum to take action. The logical

issue is amplified by the emotional consequences of the issue. Never move forward in the

process until negotiators have determined in their own words not only the logical issues to be

negotiated but also the emotional impact of the issues.

Only after the issues and the emotional consequences of the issues have been agreed upon

and prioritized should negotiators move forward.

The purpose of the of a word picture is to determine the most appropriate method of

addressing the issue logically and how to eliminate the emotional consequences the issue is

causing.

The solution portion of the word picture addresses the logical issue and the improvement

removes the emotional consequences associated with taking action. A word picture

accomplishes decreasing the risk of change in relationship to the consequences of a logically

defined issue in a manner that taking action becomes the obvious right thing to do.

Most negotiators are adequate at defining issues as well as exploring some of the emotional

consequences. However, most move too quickly to defining a solution hoping that it will have

enough value to justify action on a strictly logical basis. The formula for this approach is:

Defined issue to be negotiated < (less than) benefits of the solution = action

The problem with this plan is that it establishes very little if any emotional need to take action.

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Remember that people make decisions at an emotional level after their logical needs have

been met.

Some negotiators build minimal emotional consequences into the issue by asking more

questions and then offer a solution. The formula for this approach is:

consequence

Defined issue + consequence < (less than) benefits of the solution = action

consequence

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When word pictures are developed from the logical and emotional dimensions involving

different perspectives from different people and the solution is supported by improvements,

the formula is:

improvement

solution X improvement

consequence X improvememt

solution X improvement

A

Improvement C

solution X improvement T

Defined issue X consequence X improvement = I

solution X improvement O

N

improvement

solution X improvement

consequence X

improvement

solution X improvement

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A well-planned word picture is:

Always in the language of the negotiators

Includes a defined logical issue amplified by the emotional consequences of the

issue

A solution which fulfils the issue logically

And improvements that remove the emotional risk of taking action

By using word pictures, the need to take action is amplified to the extent that taking action

becomes necessary instead of simply a decision.

Verbalizers

Verbalizers like developing word pictures and will devote time to this process. Verbalizers will

be most valuable in contributing to the consequence dimension after the issue has been

logically defined. Questions like, “How do you feel about the (logical issue)?” or “What effect

is this (issue) having on the organization?” generate responses from the verbalizer.

Verbalizers are good resources for understanding the emotional consequences of issues.

Convincers

Convincers will quickly understand how this process can work for their benefit. Convincers

often use the process of word pictures intuitively to gain results although they may not have

defined the process. These types like the idea of increasing emotional stress in order to gain

acceptance of their perspective of the issue from others who experience difficulty in making a

logical decision (verbalizers). Convincers will be good resources for defining both the logic

and the consequences of issues once they understand the value of the process. If possible,

share the logic of the issue as perceived by the rational types and the emotional

consequences perceived by the verbalizers of the organization. Ask the persuader how he

perceives the issue and consequences based on the input from the rational types and the

verbalizers. The persuader will analyze the information and explain how to use the

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information to gain results as long at the results coincide with his specific perspective. Expect

valuable contributions to word pictures from the persuader.

Rationals

Rational types do not particularly enjoy the word picture method of discovery although they

perceive value when concise word pictures are used in presentation to cover all dimensions

of an issue and the solution. To a rational, injecting emotion into a decision confuses the

issue. Do not try to force rational types into this exercise if they resist. Focus rational types

on their strength of defining the logic of the issue and use other types to develop

consequences. Always ask the rational about how he perceives the consequences of an

issue. Listen carefully to any response about consequences offered by the rational.

Reasonable

Reasonables will contribute to this process and will find in easier to commit to

implementation when word pictures are used. Reasonables senses balance in the word

picture process and perceive it as a method of reducing risk by valuing a broader solution

based on both logic and emotion. Reasonables may be good contributors to defining the

logic issues and consequences. Concentrate and ask questions that focus on how the

consequences affect the issue with the reasonable.

Include each of the types when building word pictures in order to insure a well balanced

picture that meets the emotional and logical dimensions of the

- issue

- consequences of the issue

- solution

- improvement.

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EXAMPLE

Mr. Client, picture this, as we have discussed 1. (Insert the logical issue in the words of the

client), which is resulting in 2. (Insert the emotional consequence(s) of the issue). Think

about this, if we 3. (Insert the solution; logical response to the issue) that would result in 4.

(Insert the improvement; emotional response to the consequence(s) of the issue), how would

that make you feel?

EXAMPLE

You are working with Mr. & Mrs. Homebuyer. Mr. Homebuyer seems to be a Persuader and

Mrs. Homebuyer a Reasonable. Mr. Homebuyer has indicated that he prefers to buy a home

for no more than $150,000.00 with a room he can use for an office. Mrs. Homebuyer prefers

a home with a large kitchen. Both prefer a home less than 10 years old. You have discovered

that although the Homebuyers do not have children living at home, they have two children in

college that visit. Mr. Homebuyer has knee problems and does not want stairs.

Mr. & Mrs. Homebuyer, from your comments, I think your issues are (1) a need for a home

for less than $150,000.00 and (2) a home that will not cause additional stress on Mr.

Homebuyer’s knee. Think about this, (3) if we can find a home for less than $150,000.00

meeting your needs with minimal use of stairs, (4) then we meet your budget and preserve

Mr. Homebuyers knee. How does that make you feel?

You limit your search to 1 level homes or 2 story with a master and office on the main level

under $150,000.00 and the Homebuyers will quickly select a home because you have met

their logical and emotional needs in a manner that will require action.

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Exercise:

Think of a recent opportunity to develop a word picture.

1. Write down the issue you discovered (should be a defined logical issue).

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

2. Write down the consequence of the issue (should be the emotional consequence(s) of the

issue).

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

3. Write down the solution to the issue (should be the logical response to the issue).

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

4. Write down the improvement (should be the emotional response to the consequence(s) of

the issue).

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

5. Pick the most important words used in 1-4 and write a word picture using as few words as

possible to present the thought.

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

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Think about how to verbalize the thought in a 1-2 sentences and write it down.

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

Developing your own style of using word pictures in negotiating will result in:

-All types of negotiators will grasp the scope of the issue from their prospective and in their

language

-A logical path for the negotiating process

-An emotional reason to take action (and a purpose for compromising, if necessary)

-Resulting in momentum for all negotiators to seek satisfactory solutions and the necessity to

take immediate action

The objective of developing word pictures is to cause each negotiator by satisfying his

particular logical / emotional make up to be compelled to seek solutions and acceptable

compromise because the need to take action is greater than any individual position.

HIDDEN AGENDAS

When you are negotiating with clients and especially other agents you need to uncover any

hidden agendas. Hidden agendas are the motives for action that are purposely not disclosed

to you. When negotiating with other agents, they probably have information that their client

has told them not to share. Convincers will share hidden agenda information only if they think

they will get more than they give. Rationals will not give out hidden agenda information.

Disclosing would be a personal violation to a rational. Reasonables will not offer any hidden

agenda information. If you encourage verbalizers to talk and listen you can gain a great deal

of information. Convincers will bait the other types to see what they can find out. Rationals

usually do not approve of trying to get unauthorized information. Reasonables do not

volunteer the information but may fall prey to the convincer. Verbalizers may give out too

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much info when encouraged to talk. Verbalizers may miss what someone else divulges by

not listening closely.

People guard their hidden agendas very carefully. As you get better at negotiating you will

gain a sense of when the other parties are not telling everything or not telling the truth. When

you sense this is happening, stop the negotiations and re-assess where the process is.

Always refer to the negotiating process and not a particular person if this strategy becomes

necessary. If you single out the person, he will usually become defensive and guard himself

even more. If you refer to the process, you allow all parties to interject questions or concerns

that will bring the process back on track. If the person who is guarding does not contribute to

the refocusing of the process, ask what he thinks or what else he would like to contribute to

the negotiations.

EXAMPLE

It is not uncommon in real estate transactions to encounter hidden agendas in agents or

clients. In many cases husbands and wives do not communicate agendas well and as a

result, needs and concerns are not clearly defined.

Mike has just been transferred to your community and is excited about his new position.

Mary finds herself moving from the community where she grew up and has family and friends

she will be leaving. Mary is not nearly as excited about the move as Mike and may or may

not express her concerns. As Mike and Mary’s agent, you will probably receive mixed signals

about property based on each’s true desire to move. Mike is probably going to like anything

he sees because he is ready to move to something that is “better” for him. Mary may seem to

find something wrong with every property because it actually represents a mover she does

not want to make.

What can an agent do to help this process

__________________________________________________________________________

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__________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

The most difficult issue in this example may be uncovering what the problem is. Mary may

not even know why she is finding the process so difficult. Uncovering hidden agendas

requires patients and asking questions that allow a client to give the information you need.

In the above example, asking Mary about her former home and environment will provide

some information. Questions like, how many times have you moved before? How long did

you live in the last community? What activities were you involved in? may help. With the right

information, you may be able to assure Mary that similar opportunities will be available.

Hidden agendas can occur when any party to a transaction is pushed outside their comfort

zone and for some reason feels that he / she cannot reveal the reasons. The party will

interject information that has nothing to do with the issue either purposely or subconsciously.

In the above example, Mary may not want to disclose why she is unhappy about the move to

protect the feeling of Mike.

Exercise:

Pick the most meaningful principle of Section 2 and:

1. Write down the principle:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 2. How will you apply the principle when negotiating?___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

3. How will applying this principle cause you to be a better negotiator?___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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