8
News Letter Vol : 0801 S C H O O L Q U A R T E R L Y R E P O R T Dear Parents, We have finished 3 months at Fountainhead! It doesn’t feel that long – and yet it seems that we have come a long way. Things have now settled in quite well on all fronts. Transportation service is reasonably settled with almost everyone happy with the same. Some small wrinkles need to be sorted out both ways – you will need to cooperate so as to help us ensure that the transportation ser- vice is efficient yet effective. And as far as food is concerned, I understand that most parents are reasonably happy with the same (else I would be getting some complaints)! In fact, I take this opportunity to thank all of you for your cooperation and patience during the first few weeks when we were facing some issues. We hope to continue getting your support. All the indoor facilities are now ready as most of you would already have seen when you visited the school on August 15 The library is fully ready with more than 5000 books (and we are adding another 8000 books in the next 3 months). I take this opportunity to encourage all of you to take the maximum advantage of the library by helping your children issue as many books as possible. Please remember that while at a time they can issue only 2 books, but they there’s no limit of how many times they can issue the books in a week (for the primary kids). So encourage your child to take advantage of the same. The dance and music rooms are fully equipped with hi-end sound systems and facilities that we hope will help our children blossom. The computer lab is internet ready for the children – for their research work, presentations and other work. The outdoor facilities – namely basketball court & multipurpose field will be ready as per schedule – by December. Work will start on the same in another 10-15 days time, once the rains are over. On the academic front, I think we are quite happy with the progress that we have made and the progress that the children have made as well. Teachers & children alike seem to be enjoying the process and more importantly are also learning quite a bit. Let me also take this opportunity to clarify that Fountainhead School is not just a place to enjoy for the children. In fact if the children are just enjoy- ing and not learning, then we would have failed because enjoyment without learning is just like watching a good movie. The more difficult challenge before all of us is to ensure that children learn and yet enjoy themselves. And the PYP program is certainly challenging – it makes the children think for themselves - which is what we want! Your role in your child’s education is critical –please make sure that you are very regular in attending the academic orientations. Unless you attend the same, you will find it difficult to keep track of what’s happening in school. If you have doubts in what your role in your child’s education should be, get in touch with the school counselors through phone/email or with the classteacher through the commu- nication diary. You are aware that we have had the first official visit from the IBO on August 19 and the IBO seems to share our assessment of ourselves. Ankita has shared more details about the same in her report. You must already have got the note regarding workshops for next year’s admissions. I request you to encourage prospective parents for the next academic session to attend this meeting which may be a deciding criterion in those cases where the demand of seats is greater than the available seats. Lastly, it’s been an exhilarating experience till now for the whole Fountain- head team and we hope that we are able to continue giving your children a similar experience. Yours truly, Vardan Kabra

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Page 1: Newsletter - 2008

News Letter Vol : 0801

S C H O O L Q U A R T E R L Y R E P O R T

Dear Parents,

We have finished 3 months at Fountainhead!

It doesn’t feel that long – and yet it seems that

we have come a long way. Things have now

settled in quite well on all fronts.

Transportation service is reasonably settled

with almost everyone happy with the same.

Some small wrinkles need to be sorted out

both ways – you will need to cooperate so as

to help us ensure that the transportation ser-

vice is efficient yet effective. And as far as food

is concerned, I understand that most parents

are reasonably happy with the same (else I

would be getting some complaints)!

In fact, I take this opportunity to thank all of

you for your cooperation and patience during

the first few weeks when we were facing some

issues. We hope to continue getting your

support.

All the indoor facilities are now ready as most

of you would already have seen when you

visited the school on August 15

The library is fully ready with more than 5000

books (and we are adding another 8000 books

in the next 3 months). I take this opportunity

to encourage all of you to take the maximum

advantage of the library by helping your

children issue as many books as possible.

Please remember that while at a time they can

issue only 2 books, but they there’s no limit of

how many times they can issue the books in

a week (for the primary kids). So encourage

your child to take advantage of the same.

The dance and music rooms are fully

equipped with hi-end sound systems and

facilities that we hope will help our children

blossom. The computer lab is internet ready

for the children – for their research work,

presentations and other work.

The outdoor facilities – namely basketball

court & multipurpose field will be ready as per

schedule – by December. Work will start on

the same in another 10-15 days time, once the

rains are over.

On the academic front, I think we are quite

happy with the progress that we have made

and the progress that the children have made

as well. Teachers & children alike seem to be

enjoying the process and more importantly

are also learning quite a bit. Let me also take

this opportunity to clarify that Fountainhead

School is not just a place to enjoy for the

children. In fact if the children are just enjoy-

ing and not learning, then we would have

failed because enjoyment without learning

is just like watching a good movie. The more

difficult challenge before all of us is to ensure

that children learn and yet enjoy themselves.

And the PYP program is certainly challenging

– it makes the children think for themselves -

which is what we want!

Your role in your child’s education is critical –please make sure that

you are very regular in attending the academic orientations. Unless

you attend the same, you will find it difficult to keep track of what’s

happening in school. If you have doubts in what your role in your

child’s education should be, get in touch with the school counselors

through phone/email or with the classteacher through the commu-

nication diary.

You are aware that we have had the first official visit from the IBO on

August 19 and the IBO seems to share our assessment of ourselves.

Ankita has shared more details about the same in her report.

You must already have got the note regarding workshops for next year’s

admissions. I request you to encourage prospective parents for the

next academic session to attend this meeting which may be a deciding

criterion in those cases where the demand of seats is greater than the

available seats.

Lastly, it’s been an exhilarating experience till now for the whole Fountain-

head team and we hope that we are able to continue giving your children

a similar experience.

Yours truly,

Vardan Kabra

Page 2: Newsletter - 2008

I N D E P E N D E N C E D A Y

Independence Day

“I remember there used to be flag hoisting

in my school. I always used to feel great and

proud watching the flag hoist. After all these

years watching these young Fountainhead

kids celebrating Independence day was

indeed great fun.

Fountainhead School celebration of Inde-

pendence Day started with a flag-raising

ceremony.

--Falguni Jariwala.

Student experience on 15th August

Hi…………. My name is Khushman. I will tell

you about the Independence Day at our Foun-

tain Head School. First it was started with the

flag hoisting. With the flag hoisting, we sang

the national anthem. Then it went on with the

speeches. Then the students of std. 3, 4, and5

sang the song “nanna muna rahi ho’’. Then the

students of std. 3, 4, and 5 did a dance per-

formance which ended with a loud applause.

Also the article that std. 5th had written on

migration was inaugurated by the parents of

std. 5th students. After that the parents were

allowed to see the premises of the school. It

was the most enjoyable moment of my life.

--Khushman Adnani Class- V

My overall experience at Fountainhead School

is fantastic. The way the teachers manage

to teach without book is superb. The school

campus is going to be huge.

The Independence Day event was a huge

success because our dance was a hit, the audi-

ence appreciated us and we had fun. We even

learned something, how to do loads of things

in a short time. I liked the way the school

provided everything. In my previous school,

we were given chocolates and shooed of. I

won’t say that the event was perfect; it also

had some bad points like when we painted

our hands, the paint didn’t come off easily,

we had to sit for a lot of time before our turn

came without touching a thing because of

the paint. I am glad it wasn’t perfect, because

then I would have expected the other to also

be perfect.

Pahini Kapadia Class - V

The day featured a special programme pre-

sented by young generation of class 1-5. The

programme featured Indian dance and music

performed by students. The programme also

included release of book written by Class -5

students, small gesture of thanks by Fountain-

head Team to Vardan Sir, Ankita Maam and

Parag Sir for Oasis workshop. Even parents

attended this function truly appreciated these

young generation and efforts taken by FS

team.

It was indeed a moment of joy for Fountain-

head School to celebrate its first event and see

its students live in action.

--Sonam Vachhani

Page 3: Newsletter - 2008

INDEPENDENCE DAY SPEECH (abridged version) Vardan Kabra (Head of School )

Dear Parents,

Today we are celebrating Independence

day! What is the relevance of the Indepen-

dence day to today’s generations. Most of us

have not even been directly involved in the

Independence struggle – our only exposure is

through stories and movies and songs. How

is the Independence day now relevant for us?

How is it relevant to the parents and children

sitting here today?

I am going to touch upon the independence

of spirit that each one of us needs here, and

especially all the children here.

The independence that I am talking about is

what we need to instill in our children through

education at school and at home:

Independence from our fear,

independence from mindsets decades old,

independence in making choices,

independence in making decisions!

Independence in learning,

independence in teaching,

independence in thinking,

independence in imagining.

Independence in exploring,

independence in discovering,

independence in inventing,

independence in creating!

That is the independence that each one of

needs to achieve and that is independence

that will help the children here to blossom

into self-confident individuals that we all want

them to be! And that independence is what

we have in our hands to give to the children

sitting here today! Together we can do that.

And if we are able to give to our children this

independence, then they will make India and

the society around them, the truly indepen-

dent nation that our forefathers dreamt of.

In this context, let us look at some famous

lines written by Rabindranath Tagore:

Where the mind is without fear and the head

is held high;

Where knowledge is free;

Where the world has not been broken up into

fragments by narrow domestic walls;

Where words come out from the depth of

truth;

Where tireless striving stretches its arms

towards perfection;

Where the clear stream of reason has not lost

its way into the dreary desert sand of dead

habit;

Where the mind is led forward by thee into

ever-widening thought and action--

Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my

country awake.

Happy Independence Day!

Class - V Potrait

Jayani Mehta Class - V

Class - V Board Painting

Upcoming Events • In October: Sale of children’s books

• Oct 10-11: All Fountainhead Staff Trek to GIRA

Falls in the Dangs Forest (arranged by Prayas)

• Oct 24: “Once Upon A Tiger” a play by Work-

ing Title theatre group of Mumbai or all Fountain-

head children & parents (details to come to you

soon)

Updates & News• Our library which already has 5000+ books

has already procured 8000 more books, which

will be added to the library over a period of 3

months.

• An updated version of the School web site

www.fountainheadschools.org will be available

by 30 September. Login and send your feedback.

• We are implementing an interactive school

management software called I-School over the

next 4 months which will bring the school closer

to you.

Coming up … in the next edition:• Highlights of the Comprehensive Parents

Feedback Survey

• Snippets of Actions taken by Children at

home/school prompted by the Unit of Inquiry in

school

• Report of interesting events / anecdotes dur-

ing the Inquiry process across classes

WE ARE LOOKING FOR

Sincere, committed individuals

• As Preschool teachers at Fountainhead Pre-

school

• Physical Educators for the new campus –

o Strong passion for sports, fitness and physical

education in general

o Preferably with Martial Arts (Taekwando)

o Freshers or Individuals with no teaching back-

ground are also welcome.

If you know someone who fits the description

above, please ask him/her to e-mail surat@foun-

tainheadschools.org or call 0261-3103441/2.

Page 4: Newsletter - 2008

T E A C H E R S & C H I L D R E N E X P E R I E N C E

Teacher Experience

Students like you.

With students like you, teaching is easy

I look forward to each day;

Your wondering minds keep me on my toes;

You make teaching more like play.

Students like you make teaching rewarding;

When I go home, I’m content;

You pay attention, you learn—giving me

A sense of accomplishment.

Thank you for being the way you are,

For making my job so much fun.

I’ll remember how good you made me feel,

Even when my teaching is done.

--Zahabiyah Shaikhmahmood. Class I

Teachers are loving,

Teachers are caring,

Teachers are understanding,

That’s why I’m teaching.

My experience at Fountainhead is really amaz-

ing. I have been teaching for the past eight

years. Teaching in other school is much differ-

ent from teaching in Fountainhead School. In

this school we all work collaborately for the

planning of the Unit Of Inquiry. This brings us

all very close together. We (17 teachers) Who

have undergone the training together, feel

that we know each other more than 10 years

but we have all just met each other from the

1st of April. We have been grouped up accord-

ing to our classes, even so we feel like sisters

working in the institute. I really feel like being

in a home and working together. This is my

deepest thoughts and feeling for the institute.

--Daksha Kharwar. Class II

Dedicated, Sincere, Hardworking

Is how I would describe myself

Understanding, Loving, Impulsive

Is how my dear ones think about me.

The first months at Fountainhead School

It has been an overwhelming experience, for me at the school. The ini-

tial days were spent in getting to know my children better and the kids

spent their days exploring the school to their heart’s content.

Then we (my class 3 with me) gradually started with our unit of inquiry

with a bit of apprehension, but the kids had the time of their lives. One

step at a time we moved on from exploration, field trips, movies and

towards self learning. All through the time the kids and me learning

from our experiences.

I can confidently say that it has been an enriching time for us. We are all

looking forward to discovering new ways of learning by trying to make

the right connections.

--Mariyam Baxamusa. Class III

EDUCATION WHERE SHARING IS NOT CALLED CHEAT-ING

When I grew up at that time learning was a collective activity .But

when I got to school and tried to share learning with other students

it was considered as cheating .The curriculum at that time sent a clear

message that learning was highly individualistic and almost secretive

endeavor, but now the scenario of learning has changed with the com-

ing of Primary years programme (PYP).

PYP is such a programme which believes in enduring understanding

.It aims at giving knowledge in depth rather than in width. The pro-

gramme covers conceptual knowledge and not the factual knowledge.

It clearly follows the words of one of the great educationalist Confucius

who said :

“ Every truth has four corners , as a teacher I can give you one corner

and it is for you to find the other three.”

In PYP teacher just gives a spark to the students , with the help of

which they explore concepts. It makes the student curious to learn

and when someone learns with curiosity the learning takes place to it’s

fullest.

Great Philosopher John Dewey said “Since there is no single set of abili-

ties running throughout human nature ,there is no single curriculum

which all should undergo. Rather the school should teach everything

that anyone is interested in learning.”

PYP also follow his words .It teaches the things which do not just go

away with the classes but remain with the student throughout his life

.It teaches things which are Engaging, Significant, Challenging and very

important Relevant with life.

Today when I’m working in such an institute which fulfills all the above

said expectations ,I find myself to be very lucky and I can say that those

who are receiving such an education are more lucky because when

they will share their learning they will not be blamed for cheating.

The education in PYP is indeed an education with difference which will

surely bring revolution in Indian education system and produce much

more efficient citizens than produced earlier. Thanks to Fountainhead

for giving such an opportunity to Suraties.

--Priyanka Tiwari Class IV

Page 5: Newsletter - 2008

Student Experiences

2.5 Months at FountainheadClass - IIIFountainhead school is so nice

It is a great hit

The first unit was “Who we are”

Where we learnt to be fit

We also learnt about the food pyramid

No not the ones in Egypt

A special one with food groups and color

schemes

We learnt the body systems too circulatory, respi-

ratory and digestive

All about you.

Now we are on to our next one

There are six units all together

Wait and watch the fun we are going to have.

--Ruhi Shah

The Fountainhead school is the place where we

get education for a better world

-- Dhruv Shah

Now that I study at Fountainhead school

I like to learn as I went for field trips too

I like Janaki madam and Mariyam Madam

Nishtha, Ruhi, Harshee and Subha are the new

friends which I made.

-- Ayushi Shah

My first day at school I was not feeling too good

But now I am very happy

With so many activities to do

I want to tell all to come to my school

As it has all that my old school did not have---

Jash Kirat Singh Virdi

The first day at school I thought it to be a play-

ground

Where we would be playing all the time

We had nature walks and field trips

And learnt about learner profile

I love my school

--Jugal Kachiwala

Class - II Making Fan

At Fountainhead school we have no exams

But we had fun making posters of our lesson

And we wrote poems and played healthy games

Oh what fun!

-- Zeal Shah

I learnt many new things from this school

I love it

The activities are fun

We made mind maps,

Played Healthy Island game,

Made a chart for nouns

Talked to a nutrition expert

We made a cook book

And went for a field trip to Reliance Fresh

I am loving it.

--Nishtha Jain

At first we played many games

Then we started our U.O.I

Health and well being

No we do not have any books

--Subha Agarwal

We played games like

Automobile, Healthy Island and Girls vs Boys

I made new friends and got more knowledge

The classroom is decorated very nicely

We learnt about food pyramid and nutrition

facts.

--Harshee Adnani

We made mind maps and played games too

The school is good and I love it too

--Noopur Patel

Writing poems

Making mind maps

No bell for periods to change

And clocks in each class for time to tell

That is Fountainhead school

For you and for me to have fun and learn well

--Chirag Sawlani

Class - II Wind Socks

Fountainhead school is a different school

Where we play games and learn too

Automobile and Healthy Island to name a few

Our section name is Skills

Which we all have displayed well.

--Smit Chauhan.

Class - IVIt is different from other schools

--Asiya Razvi

In IB board there are ten learners profile like car-

ing, Principles, Thinkers, Enquirer, well-balanced,

open-minded, risk taker, communicator, Knowl-

edge and reflectiv --Shaurya & Jayani

All the assignments are done by students only, so

we get confidence to do our work on our own

--Jigyasha Gothi.

Our attitude is more positive now

--Khushi Shah

Good values are also taught here

--Snehil Raizada

Teachers are very good, they encourage us to do

good things and to be a responsible person

--Vivek Bachhawat.

We are always very happy as we have freedom to

study and to do different activites. --Naomi Gajjar

Studies are different from other school

--Manan Shah.

Teaching style is different, which makes it more

exicting

--Parantap Sinha.

Class VWhen I first joined Fountainhead my experience

was not that good because I had left my old

school and friends. Now I can proudly say that

Fountainhead is the best school

--Khushman Adani.

Sneh Chauhan Class - V

Page 6: Newsletter - 2008

A R T

: ART ARTICLE :

Always among the highest expression of every

culture, the arts teach us much about every

historical period through its literature, visual

arts, music, dance, and drama. Today it is

recognized that to be truly well educated one

must not only learn to appreciate

Samradhi Jain Class - I

the arts, but must have rich opportunities to

actively participate in creative work. The arts

are languages that most people speak, cutting

through individual differences

Class - III Board Painting

in culture, educational background, and abil-

ity. They can bring every subject to life and

turn abstractions into concrete reality. Learn-

ing through the arts often results in greater

academic achievement and higher test scores.

The most expansive areas where the arts pay

off are these: first, in basic reading skills, lan-

guage development, and writing skills.

Jugal Kachiwala Class - III

Increases in general academic skills also show

up and would appear to reinforce these spe-

cific literacy-related developments. Here we

refer to focus and concentration, skills in

Class - II Board Painting

expression, persistence, imagination, creativ-

ity, and inclinations to tackle problems with

zeal. In addition, a wide range of social skills

accompanies learning in the arts and engage-

ment in arts activities. These are the sorts of

skills and behaviors that, in their absence, par-

ents and teachers have been seen to tear their

hair out: positive social behavior, social com-

pliance, and collaboration with others, ability

to express emotions, courtesy, tolerance,

Sneh Chauhan Class - V

conflict resolution skills, and attention to

moral development.

Class - IV

Class - II Art room Display

Class - II Class room Painting

Class - IV Board Painting

IB-PYP PRELIMINARY VISIT REPORT

Fountainhead School had its IBO Preliminary

visit on 19th August 2008. With this visit, we

kicked off our IBO affiliation process. The steps

of PYP affiliation can be seen in figure : 1.1.

Kathy Derrick (ex-PYP Co-ordinator, Interna-

tional School of Singapore, a PYP workshop

trainer and now associate regional manager

for IB Asia Pacific) visited Fountainhead School

for the IBO Preliminary visit. She spent one full

working day in the school. Her first impression

about the school was that she loved the fact

that the school was in the countryside, away

from the city and surrounded by fields.

She spent a lot of time interacting with the

school leadership team- Vardan Kabra, Ankita

Diwekar-Kabra and Parag Shah discussing

school leadership, curriculum, teacher train-

ing, parent involvement, facilities planned etc

She was impressed with the school’s focus on

professional development of teachers and the

time built in their daily schedule for planning

and class preparation. Kathy was also happy

about the kind of parent communication the

school focuses on so that all parents are in

touch with the school.

Page 7: Newsletter - 2008

I B O

V I S I T

R E P O R T

Phase Comments Timelines

Consider-

ation Phase

School inves-

tigates the

programme

and feasibil-

ity of its

implementa-

tion. The pre-

liminary visit

is a part of

this phase

6 months

from the

starting of

the school

Candidate

Phase

School

imple-

ments the

programme

as guided by

the regional

office.

At least one

academic

year. We

expect that

in the 2009-

10 session,

Fountain-

head will be

in candidate

phase.

Application

Phase

School

continues to

implement

and applies

for authori-

zation

This will hap-

pen in later

part of 2009-

10 session.

Authoriza-

tion

School is au-

thorized to

deliver the

programme.

By end of

2010-11

session, we

expect to

be an PYP

authorized

school.

Fig : 1.1

She toured the school and visited the class-

rooms and special rooms. She was impressed

with the school infrastructure and facilities

and recommended that classroom size be

limited to 20 students and that we use more

manipulatives for Mathematics and Language

for better conceptual understanding of

students.

I must mention here that she was particularly

happy with the seat belts installed in buses.

On the same note, I must also state that we

are not able to follow wearing seat belts at all

times.

Kathy also spent time interacting with the

PYP teachers. She was impressed with their

understanding about PYP and answered their

queries on how to lead an inquiry based class-

room. She also emphasized on working more

to make the learner profile alive and authen-

tic. She also suggested that the PYP training

for teachers should be a year long activity

so that we keep revisiting our PYP concepts

again and again.

Overall, the visit went off very well. One com-

ment that we received again and again from

Kathy was that for a school which is barely 2

months old, we have managed to achieve a

lot. We are happy to know and to inform you

that we are on track to successfully implement

the PYP. Looking forward, we will be an IB

candidate school latest by 1st April 2009. The

affiliation process will be another 2 years from

then. We look forward to your enthusiastic

support towards our journey in becoming a

PYP school.

An excerpt from the official report from IBO:

“It was indeed a privilege to visit Fountain-

head School to discuss the vision and plans

of the executive committee and the leader-

ship team, to hear the enthusiasm of the

staff and to see structures and practices

already in place in the school, which will

greatly support the implementation of the

programme. The school has begun

implementing units of inquiry, with knowl-

edgeable and positive guidance from the

Principal and the PYP Coordinator. The leader-

ship team were eager to discuss future

professional development opportunities both

in school and regional.

The school community is committed and

enthusiastic and truly believe in the

programme, making links between it and

good teaching practice and past

experiences. The school is growing and devel-

oping, and staff are adapting to needs

as they occur. The school is also realistic in

their outlook for the future as enrolment

increases, and the new site develops, they

recognize that structures will need to be

consistently re-examined.

As a result of the visit to Fountainhead School

and the discussions which occurred

with the leadership team and staff, it is quite

apparent that Fountainhead School has

set themselves up for successful implementa-

tion of the PYP. I look forward with great

interest to hear about the ongoing develop-

ment of the programme and the school. I

wish Fountainhead School every success with

the implementation of the Primary

Years Programme.”

--Ankita Kabra Academic Head

Interaction With Teachers

Visiting Dining Hall

Visiting The Classes

Page 8: Newsletter - 2008

P A R E N T I N G

The Case Against Gold Stars By Alfie Kohn

www.alfiekohn.org/articles.htm

Call it the “gold-star syndrome.” Sometimes we paste stars on a chart. At

other times we offer toys or extra TV, candy or cash, pizza or special privi-

leges. We reward kids for doing what we want instead of punishing them

for disobeying.

Pull out a child-care book at random -- or just watch a typical parent at

home -- and you’ll notice that the emphasis is on “positive reinforcement.” It

is so pervasive that few of us pause to question its effects.

The bad news, according to a growing body of research, is that bribery

-- which is what rewards amount to -- is not much of an improvement over

punishing children. In fact, I strongly believe that rewards and punishments

really aren’t opposites at all. They are two sides of the same coin, and the

coin doesn’t buy very much.

“Rewards work!” many parents insist. But work to do what? And at what

cost? The answer to the first question is that rewards, like punishments, are

extremely effective at getting us one thing and one thing only: temporary

obedience. What they can never do, however, is help children become

responsible, ethical, decent people.

Studies conclude that rewards are ineffective. In the process of writing a

book on the subject, I’ve found hundreds of studies showing that rewards

are strikingly ineffective at producing lasting change in attitudes or behav-

iors. Once the rewards run out, people go right back to acting the way they

did. And no wonder. Rewards don’t create an enduring commitment to any

value or action; they merely change what we do.

Consider the questions that children may ask themselves. Threaten a pun-

ishment and a child will come to ask, “What am I supposed to do, and what

will happen to me if I don’t do it?” Bribe him by dangling a reward and he’ll

wonder, “What am I supposed to do, and what will I get for doing it?” Notice

how similar these two questions are, and how different from what we want

children to ask: “What kind of person do I want to be?” Good values have to

be grown from the inside out; bribes and threats at best change children’s

behavior only for a while.

But isn’t temporary compliance sometimes good enough? Clearly it is

tempting to use any means at our disposal to stop a four-year old from

making a fuss at the store, to get an eight year-old out the door on time, or

to get a ten-year-old to settle down and finish her homework. In the short

term, a sufficiently appealing carrot will usually work. But the long-term

costs are considerable.

Rewards simply control through seduction rather than force, according to

University of Rochester psychologists Edward Deci, Ph.D., and Richard Ryan,

Ph.D., and all techniques that rely on control ultimately undermine what

children need in order to make good decisions and take responsibility for

their actions. At least two studies have shown, for example, that kids whose

parents reward them frequently are less generous than their peers.

Surprising? It shouldn’t be. A child promised a treat or praised extravagantly

for helping people has learned that the only reason to act that way is that

he’ll get something for it. No reward, no reason to care.

Other research shows that the more students are led to focus on getting

good grades, the less interested they will be in what they are studying, the

less creative their thinking will be, and the more they will try to take the

easy way out. Again, it makes sense: The more children see the “A” as the

goal, the more they will come to see the learning itself as something to be

gotten over with. The practice of paying kids for top grades -- offering, in

effect, a reward for a reward -- doubles the damage.

At the University of Illinois, researchers introduced some preschoolers to a

beverage called kefir. Some were just asked to drink it; others were praised

lavishly or promised treats for drinking. Did the rewarded kids slurp down

more kefir? You bet. But a week later they wanted nothing to do with the

stuff, whereas the children offered no reward liked it just as much as, if not

more than, before.

Substitute reading, doing math, or acting responsibly for drinking kefir,

and you begin to glimpse the destructive power of rewards. In fact, a good

general rule is that the more we want our children to want to do somethins,

the more counterproductive it will be to reward them for doing it.

It’s not the reward itself that’s objectionable -- it’s the practice of using

something as a reward that causes the problem: “Do this and you’ll get that.”

This feels controlling, causes dependence, and may spoil our relationship

with our children. We risk coming to be seen as goody dispensers who have

to be pleased rather than as loving and caring allies.

What’s the alternative? Even praise, if the emphasis is on doing what

we want and what makes us happy, can be counterproductive. There is,

however, nothing wrong with positive comments that acknowledge and

encourage what children have done -- and leave them feeling proud of

themselves. Such comments are nice but if our long-term goal is more

ambitious than getting kids to obey mindlessly, then we’ll have to take the

extra step of bringing them in on the process of making decisions.

You might say to your seven year-old, “I’ve noticed that lately it’s taking

you a long time to get dressed in the morning, honey. What do you think

we can do to solve that?” And we have to reconsider some of our requests

instead of just forcing compliance. For example, rather than fall back on

bribes to get a four-year-old to sit through a long dinner, we might reflect

on whether that expectation is age-appropriate.

Giving up anything that we’re used to is a challenge. But the evidence is

clear: Rewards may be effective at training a pet, but raising good kids

means working with them rather than doing things to them.