Writing reference (Paper 2) Contents Checklist of key points for writing p. 206 Model answers, with hints and useful phrases

Semi-formal letter/email p. 206 Story p. 208 Letterlemail to a friend p. 209 Report p. 210

- -Articte p. Mt Letter of application p. 212 Essay p. 213 Review p. 214 Set book (article) p. 215

Useful lirikirlg words and phrases p. 216 Sample answers

Semi-formal letter p. 217 Story p. 218 Letter to a friend p. 219 Essay p. 220 Report p. 221 Article p. 222 Review ' p. 223

General marking guidelines p. 224

Checklist Answering the question Have you

answered all parts of the question? included all the necessary information written the required number of words? organised your ideas appropriately, using paragraphs where necessary? written clearly so that it is easy to read?

Accuracy Are there any mistakes in grammar, vocabulary, spelling or punctuation? Range Have you used

a variety of grammatical structures? a range of interesting vocabulary? a range of linking words? !

your language appropriate for the type of riting? (Remember to think about who you are

writing for.) Is your answer interesting for the reader, and would it have a positive effect?

Semi-formal letterlemail (Part 1)

(For work on semi-formal letters and emails, see pages 28 and 140.)

Task

You recently had a short holiday in a large city which you booked through a company called citibreaks. You were very disappointed with the holiday. Read the CitiBreak advertisement for the holiday you booked and the notes you have made. Then write a letter to CitiBreaks, explaining what the problems were and telling them what you want them to do.

Enjoy a short holiday in the capital city.

We offer two nights' accommodation in a four-star hotel in a central N~~ - -

location. long way out!

All rooms have their own bathrooms, View n o t and a view of the river.- . rlver - car pi

The price of £1 50 per person includes all meals as well as Dinner

a ticket for a show of your choice c o s t extra

- only rrk

-~ -

in one of the city's leading theatres\ No choice o f show

This will be a real holiday to - -. -- -

remember!

Refund - half cost?

Write a letter of between 120 ar~u I>U words. You must use grammatically correct sentences with accurate spelling and punctuation in a style appropriate for the situation.

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Model answer

why you are writing. DON'T begin by saying who you are.

DO list your complaints clearly, using linking words to connect your actual complaint with the details. 1 When you are writing a letter or an ernail to someone you don't know, use a semi- formal style. If you don't know their name, a letter starts with Dear SirlMadam and ends Yours faithfully. If you know' their name, a letter usually starts with Dear MrslMrlMisslMs + surname, and ends Yours sincerely.

email, you can use 'Best wishes'.

Dear Sir,

I

1 __ You don't need to I I put an address for a letter in either Part 1 or Part 2. - I am writing to complain about a short holiday I had recently 1

organised by your company. There were several problems with the holiday.

First, your advertisement promised a hotel in a central I I 1

location, whereas in fact the hotel was a long way from the DO make a clear connection between

centre. You said all rooms had a river view, but my window your letter and the task overlooked a noisy car park. I had to pay extra for dinner,

exact words in the task -although you stated that it was included. To make matters

worse, I couldn't choose which show to go to. I had hoped to go to a new musical, but I had to go to one I had already seen.

I I I had been looking forward to my holiday very much, but it I was completely ruined. I therefore feel that you should refund half the cost of the holiday in compensation for my

your letter, DO finish disappointment. with this sentence on a

separate line.

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

I : Yours faithfully, I

(1 49 words)

Useful language

Complaining I am writing to you about Oeveral problems related to my city break in June). I have been waiting for (two weeks for a reply to my letter). To make matters worse, (we re re informed that there was no record o f our cheque being cashed). I would be grateful if you could (refund my deposit as soon as possible).

Requesting information I am writing in response to (PUT ar':?T'Sement in The Daily Standard on JL I would be grateful if you could 'sene me fuc,ber details about the positioi I am writing to enquire whether c.311 c ~ Y ' , " '5: me have further details abour me no/!( I would like to know more about 'rhe z--zncemeots for the evening meal).

Giving inforrnationlResponding to reqwsts for information

In response to your query, 1 would like to inform you that '! passed the FCE in June

With reference to your letter of ... , 2-r Y". :E? '3'-:. z~3"~catiorls). You asked me to tell you about (m:, 2 . 9 E; 3-5 s - r F: : ~ c Lacher details).

WritinP reference (Paver 2)

Story

(For work on stories, see pages 40 and 152.)

Task

Your teacher has asked you to write a story for the school's English language magazine. The story must begin with the following words:

I wanted to do my best, but more than that I wanted the team to win.

Write your story. (You should write between 120-180 words.)

Model answer

when things happened in your story (e.g. It was the last football game of the season. when the second half started . . .).

narrative tenses.

because it makes the story more interesting to read.

DO try to create some suspense. I-

Useful language We had been (talking about John) just before (he phoned). It wasn't until (I read the letter) that (I realised how dangerous the situation was). While (I was waiting for my friends, I saw someone go into the house opposite). As soon as (my friends arrived, we went to have a look). I was just about to (open the door), when (I heard a noise downstairs). By the time (I got back to the house, there was no one to be seen). After waiting (for a few minutes, I decided to climb in through the window). A few seconds later, (the lights went out). Eventually/After a while, (my friends arrived). At last (I knew what I had to do).

I wanted to do my best, but more than that I wanted the team to win. It was the last football

-\ game of the season, and if we won, we would be the champions. As we ran onto the pitch, 1 couldn't help feeling nervous. The crowd was cheering, but the opposition looked strong. It wasn't going to be easy.

The game started. I qot the ball and raced -----_,

towards the goal. ' ~ b on!' roaredJhe~r_owd, but I kicked it straiqht into the hands of the goalkeeper. ever mind,' yelled my team-mate - Joe-Good try!' We played hard, but at half-time the score was 0-0.

When the second half started, it was raining - heavily. Our chance of winning the championship was sl'lpping away. We struggled to get the ball through the defence, but time after time they stopped us. Now there were only two minutes left. Suddenly I had the ball. I passed it to Joe, who headed it straight into the goal, just as the referee blew his whistle. The crowd went crazy.

- We were the champions!

(1 79 words)

I DON'T write about a topic if you don't know some specific vocabulary related to it (e.g. score, goalkeepe~ goal, pitch). DO use interesting

-- vocabulary (e.g. raced, roared).

add to the atmosphere of the story.

Writing reference (Paper 2 I

Letterlemail to a friend

(For work on informal letters and emails, see pages 16 and 164.)

Task

You have received a letter from your pen friend inviting you for a visit in July. Write a letter to your pen friend, accepting the invitation, suggesting something you would like to do and asking what you should bring with you.

Write your letter. Do not write any postal addresses. (You should write between 120-180 words.)

Useful language Beginning the letter or email

Many thanks for your letter (- i t was really nice to hear from you again). I thought I'd better write (and give you some more details about . . .) It's been such a long time since we wrote to each other. How are you and your family? How are things with you? How was (your holiday)?

Introducing the topic 1 know you're longing to hear all about (my holiday). You remember I told you in my last letter (that I was going to . . .)

Ending the letter or email Once again, (thanks very much for all your help). Give my love/regards to (your family). Please write/drop me a line soon. I look forward to (meeting up again soon).

Model answer

Don't write Dear Pen friend.

I Dear Carla. -,

I lhanks for your le-t-t-er - it was great t o hear from I ---- I you. I ' m -cry I haven't w-t-t-en for ages, but Ih I been really busy preparing for my exams. I t ' s really -- - - _ _

good news -that you've passed your driving test. --I specific details to i n r l ~ ~ d ~ in each paragraph -this will make your letter or

time you will see the

letter or email, e.g. Love, All the best, Best wishes. DON'T finish your letter or ernail with Yours sincerely1

'kank you 50 mu& for yooc invitation t o stay w i t h

yol, for a week in July - I ' d love t o come. I k n o w

--I-- you have a wonderful beach near your be, and I I I ' d really enjoy spending m e time -there. I expect I I -that -We oxather dl1 be hot, - I hope we can go I I You said that I don't need t o bring mcch w i th me. I I W h a t y*r of clothes should I pack? Casual or formal? I I Would you like me t o bring anyming for you? I would I I like t o bring sanething special for you and your family I

from my country.

I ' d be-t-i-er stop nou, and ge* on w i t h my &-udying. I

I hope you're enjoying driving your car, and I b looking

fo rm~d t o seeing you in July!

Thank again for -the invitation. I

(1 69 words)

been doing recently.

-

DO mention a letter or email you have received from the person you are writing to, or refer to a shared experience.

IVriting reference (Paper 2)

Report Useful language

(For work on reports, see pages 78 and 114.)

Task

The school where you study English has decided to spend some money on either buying more computers or improving the library. You have been asked to write a report for the school director describing the benefits to the school of both these things, and saying which one you think should be chosen and why.

Write your report. (You should write between 120-1 80 words.)

Model answer

report with Dear SirlMadam,

DO use headings because this makes ~t easler for the reader to find the main

I information.

three points under each heading.

DO use numbering or bullet points to

I DO use formal language. ]

lntroduction

The aim of this report is to ... This report is intended to ...

Reporting results

Most people seem to feel that ... Several people saidkold me/suggestedkhought that ...

Presenting a list

They gave/suggested the following reasons: They made the following points: 1 ... 2 . . .

Making recommendations

I would therefore recommend (that we expand the librarylinstalling a new coffee machine). It would seem that (banning mobile phones) is the best idea.

I Use of money for school improvements I Introduction The aim of this report is to compare the advantages of additional computers and of improving the library, and to suggest which of these would be best. I interviewed - a number of students to find out their views.

--Buying more computers Some of the students thought that this was a good idea, saying computers were useful for:

/ practising writing using the Internet playing games.

However, other students said that they preferred to use their own computers at home.

Improving the library Most of the students preferred this suggestion, giving the following reasons: 1 Many students do not have a quiet place to study at

home. The library would be a good place for private study, but at present there are not enough tables and chairs there.

2 They feel that up-to-date dictionaries and reference books are needed.

3 They want to be able to read modern books written for young people.

DO say how you collected the information.

/--

DO use a range of specific vocabulary or set phrases e.g. Some thought this was a good idea . . .lother students said they preferred . . ., but DON'T use lots of adjectives and dramatic language as you do in a story. A report gives factual information.

Recommendations

felt that improving the library would be more useful.

I Both ideas have benefits, but the majority of students --

, I would therefore recommend this.

DO express opinions impersonally. DON'T express recommendations or opinions until the conclusion.

(1 79 words)

Writing reference (Paper 1 t

Article Useful language

(For work on articles, see pages 52, 102 and 126.) involving the reader

Task

You see this advertisement in a local English

Are you thinking of (getting married in the near future)? I'm sure you'll agree (it was a great idea).

Developing your points

Let's start with (why it is so important to take plenty of language newspaper. exercise).

Another advantage (of using a computer is that , , ,)

Hey! is looking for articles On top of that, . . .

about around the world. Giving your own opinion

write us an about a celebration that is imPoltant in your I think thaffln my opinion (traditiona/ celebrations are very

country, why the celebration is impohant and describing important). what people do. If your article is chosen for the magadne* You will fiseffns to me that (people are much more aware of the

win a weekend in a city of your choice- importance of a good diet nowadays).

Write your article. (You should write between 120-180 words.)

Model answer

interesting title. DON'T start and finish your article in the

summarising your main point and giving your opinion or expressing

~ -.-- Olinda's carnival - something for everyone

When most people think of Carnival, they think of Rio de Janeiro. But Rio isn't the only city in Brazil that knows how to have parties. I live in Olinda, a lovely city in the north-east of Brazil. What can we say - about the carnival at Olinda? Just that it's the best in the world!

Carnival has its origins in ancient Egyptian and Roman festivals. It was introduced to Brazil by the Portuguese, and was influenced by African rhythms and Indian costumes. Now it's a big national celebration.

Once Carnival starts, the whole town goes crazy! - Everyone's singing and dancing. Parades of people wearing costumes typical of our north-eastern folklore dance through the streets. I love the giant - street dolls, both t4e :rad~t~onal ones such as 'the man of midnight' a-d the rew ones that appear each year.

The best th~ng about oyr czrnrva' rs that no one has to pay and there are no 21: CET. P~eyone takes part, rich and poor, old am? .:-,-?, .esldents and tourists If you come, I Drc- sc ic- ' -ever 'orget 1t1 -

(1 79 words)

DO try to involve - your readers, e.g.

by using a question.

DO use informal -- language to involve the

reader.

-4 DON'T forqet to I express your

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Letter of application Useful language

(For work on writing applications, see page 140.)

Task

You see this advertisement in a local English language newspaper.

We are looking for students of English to spend two mornings a week helping in the

local tourist office. coed and conditions for the right applicants.

Write to us, giving information about Your level of English, and explaining why YOU

would be suitable for the job.

Write your application. Do not write any postal addresses. (You should write between 120-180 words.)

Model answer

application so that you mention each of the areas

letter as you would other -

I have always been interested in (using English in my work). One of the main reasons I am applying for this job is that (I want to work in England). I have a lot of experience of (dealing with the public). I am available to start work (at any timelfrom the end of the month). Thank you for considering my application. 1 would be grateful if you would (send me further details of the job). I can be contacted (on 0849 58 48 43) at any time. I can be contacted (at the above address). I look foiward to hearing from you soon.

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to apply for one of the positions helping in the local tourist office which were advertised in 'Kent Weekly:, on August 23rd . I am 19 years old and come from Switzerland. German is my mother tongue and I have been learning English and French for five years at a comprehensive school. At the moment I'm a student at English International, studying for -. ---

the FCE. I have always been interested in working with people. As I , have already spent three months in England, I know the local tourist attractions quite well. I would also say that I have a good knowledge of history and old places, because I have read a lot about the subject recently. In the near future, I would like to continue studying English, and so the job in your tourist office would be a great opportunity for me to improve my speaking. I am available for interview at any time. I can be contacted- on 0795 5 1 32 41 after 6 p.m. every evening. Thank you for considering my application. I look forward to hearing from you. ,- Yours faithhlly,

abr-ie\\a aanie\s

Gabriella Daniels

(1 83 words)

DO say which job you are applying for and where and when you saw it advertised. You can invent a newspaper and date if you need to.

mention why you think you are suitable.

how you can be

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Essay Useful language

(For work on essays, see pages 90 and 176.)

Task

You have been doing a class project on technology. Your teacher has asked you to write an essay giving your opinion on the following statement:

People in the modern world depend too much on computers.

Write your essay. (You should write between 120-180 words.)

Model answer

your first sentence, but -

expressions to

express your opinion

Some people claim that (your teenage years are the best

years of your life).

It is often said that (TV is a bad influence on young people).

However. in my view/opinion, . . . Firstly. it is clear that (money cannot buy happiness).

While it is true that (computer games are stimulating, they

may not be good for you in the long term).

From my point of view, Qob satisfaction is more important

than a large salary).

Finally. it is important to remember that . . . On balance then, I feel that . . . To sum up/ln conclusion, it seems to me that . . .

In today's world, nearly every aspect of life is affected by computer technology. Computers are used for business, public services, education and entertainment.

Some people are concerned by this development. They fear that vital skills are being lost as computer technology replaces traditional ways of working in a wide variety of areas, from art and design to banking and commerce. They point out the chaos that can occur when computer systems fail, leading to the breakdown of essential services such as transport, law and order.

However, people could not continue to enjoy their present standard of living without computer technology. There are now far more people in the world than there were a generation ago. The fact that there is enough food for them, that they can travel safely from one place to another, and that they can be provided with medical care, is largely due to computer technology.

In my opinion. therefore, we have to accept our dependence on computers, but at the same time we should work to find ways of making this dependence less dangerous.

agree with this - your essay should present your own argument.

detail for the points in

(1 78 words) -

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Review

(For work on reviews, see pages 15 and 64.)

Task

You recently saw this announcement in an English language magazine called Film Scene.

I. ~ ~ ; ~ ~ I ~ ~ - - = L , = L -- We need a young person's perspective on films today.

Write us a review of the last film you saw. Include . . - - - . - information on the story, characters and any special

features of the film, and say whether you would ~co-end the film to other people. The best review will

be published in next month's edition of the magazine.

Write your review. (You should write between 120-180 words.)

Useful language Introduction

The (film) I would like to review is . . . The last film I saw / book I read was . . .

Summarising the story It's set in . . . The story is based on (a book) . . It's about . . . There are many memorable characrers including . . . The main theme of the film is . . . What the film is saying is . . .

Recommending the film I would recomend this film to anyone. Although I enjoyed it, I would not recommend it for . . .

It's one of the best (shows) I've ever seen Although I am not normally keen on (musicals), I'm glad that I decided to go. The (film) lifts you out of your everyday life.

Model answer

The last film I saw was not new; in fact it was The Lord of the Rings.

about, but not in too

interesting vocabulary, to bring the film to life for the reader.

It is based on the well-known book, and tells the story of I - a creature called a hobbit who takes a dangerous magic I

ring back to the place where it was made in order to 1 destroy it. There are many memorable characters apart I I I

DO remember to mention from the hobbit and his friends, including a important or,memorable Gandalf and a sus~icious creature called Gollum. characters, but don't

spend too much time just descr~bing them.

This is a film about friendship and loyalty. However, it is the special effects that make it truly magical. There are

- vivid battle scenes with fantastic animals and birds, and I sets that are so imaginative that you want to believe they are real. But as well as this, the actual locations are

- ~deas clearly, and to ltnk beautiful, too.

I would recommend this film to anyone, even those who do not usually enjoy fantasy films. What I would say to - DO remember to give

your opinion clearly, as them is - go and try it! Like me, you might find that the thls IS the purpose of a

film lifts you out of your everyday life into a world you review, but not until the

will not want to leave. I I

(1 80 words)

Writing reference (Paper 2 1

Set book Task

About the exam: In Question 5, you answer one of two questions based on your reading of one of the set books. You may be asked t o write an essay, an article, a report or a letter.

You do not have t o answer Question 5. If you do, make sure that you know the book well enough t o be able t o answer the question properly. Here is a suggested procedure for writing about the set text.

1 Read the book all the way through, t o get a general idea of the story and the characters - and t o enjoy it !

2 Read the book again, this time more carefully. Make notes under the following headings.

Plot: include the main events and the order they come in the story.

Characters: include information about what they are like and how important they are in the story.

Relationship's: include information about who likesldislikes who, and the things that affect their r~lationships.

Places: include quick descriptions of the most important places.

Your own reactions: write down your feelings about the book, with some reasons for vour opinion.

3 Make a list of the kind of questions you might be asked t o write about, and discuss them with other students. Here are some ideas: What makes the book interesting1 exciting? Describe an exciting or memorable moment in the book. Choose the most interesting character. Describe himlher. Is this your favourite character? Is the title a good one for the book? Why? Does the book have a good ending? Explain whylwhy not. Do you think the book would make a good film? Explain your reasons. Would you recommend the book to a friend? Say why/why not.

(a) An international student magazine is running a series of articles on interesting characters in fiction, and has asked readers to send in their suggestions. Write an article on the character you found most interesting in the book you have read, saying who the character is and why you think they are so interesting.

(b) Your friend is going on holiday and wants to take a book to read on the journey. Write a letter to your friend, recommending the book you have read and giving reasons why you think they will enjoy it.

Model answer (article)

A lady with no name I DO focus on

It seems strange to experience a story through the eyes what you have been of a nameless person - but this is the case in '~ebecca',' to do,

by Daphne du Maurier. Rebecca is the name of the first DON'T just

wife of Maxim de Winter. She dies before the story tell the story of the book.

begins, and the novel is narrated by Maxim's second wife, whose name we never learn, but who is to me the most interesting character in the book. As we read, we learn of her feelings for Maxim, and of what she discovers about his past life and the wife she has replaced. -

DO make links between

So why do I think the narrator is such an interesting / paragraphs clear

character? Although she is nameless, she has a strong personality. She is emotion_alan_d her problems and I - feelings are vividly described, so that you feel sorry and for her. She has not had an easy life, and you want then say why you her to be happy, in spite of the strange things that 11ke it so much.

happen after her marriage.

All in all, her lack of an identity makes her all the more, memorable - and perhaps that is why I find her so fascinating.

(1 82 words)

Useful language The book is really exciting because (it starts with a murder). The best moment is when (the murderer is revealed). The book tells the story of (a family who have been separated). The first thing that happens is (Sarah leaves home). The main character. (Marian, is a teenager who . . .) The most interesting character is (Joe, the young man who lives . . .) The title is really good, because (it is mysterious and it makes you want to find out what it really means). The story takes place in (the South of France). Events revolve around (a robbery). The ending is very exciting because (it is completely unexpecteo tc would make (a really good film), because (rt n such an exclrlng sroryl. The best thing about the book is that (the characters are so interesting). I would recommend this book because (it is easy to read).

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Useful linking words and phrases Time sequencers before, aftel; after a while, eventually, later; then, finally, as soon as, at first, at last, when, while I immediately phoned the police. While I was waiting for them to arrive, I watched the house. At first, no one got out of the cal; but after a while the driver's door opened. And then I finally found what I was looking for:

Listing points first, firstly, first of all, to begin with, secondly, thirdly, finally Our holiday was spoiled, firstly because the hotel was uncomfortable and secondly because the weather was bad.

Adding informationlemphasising points as well as (that), in addition (to), moreover; furthermore, not only . . . (but also) .. ., what's more, on top of that, to make matters worse, in fact, as a matter of fact The hotel was miles from the beach. On top of that, the view from our bedroom window was terrible. Not only was the hotel miles from the beach, but the view from dur bedroom window was terrible too! In fact, everyone is different when it comes to personal taste.

Giving examples for example, for instance, such as I like pop groups such as The Backstreet Boys. My town has a lot of things for young people to do. For example, there are three cinemas.

Reasons, causes and results as a result, because, because of (this), so, therefore I have visited Britain several times and, as a result, my English is quite good. By the end of the day, you haven't managed to find anything that you like. So, you go home frustrated.

Contrast 1 but

But links two contrasting ideas. It is not normally used at the beginning of the sentence. Many people argue that A/ is bad for you, but 1 disagree with this.

2 however However can come at the beginning or end of a sentence. It must be separated off by commas. The advert claimed that there were huge discounts for students. However, the discount was only 5%.

I love travelling. I don ' t enjoy long flights, however.

3 although, even though, though These expressions introduce a subordinate clause of contrast. If the subordinate clause comes first, it is separated from the main clause by a comma. Although he practised every day, he didn't manage to improve. I walked home even though i t took me two hours. Note: though can be used after a comma at the end of a separate sentence that expresses something surprising. We lived in the middle of a city We still had a large garden, though.

4 whereas, while Whereas and while are used to compare two things and show how they are different. She likes football whereas I prefer tennis. My sister is very like my father while I take after my mother While is also used in the same way as although. While computers are important, we shouldn't let them rule our lives.

5 in spite of (the fact that), despite (the fact that) These expressions must be followed by a noun or -ing form. Despite is slightly more formal. In spite of the fact that they are expensive, many people want to buy designer clothes. Despite all the research that has been done, we still haven't found a cure for cancer

6 in fact, the fact of the matter is This is used when you are saying what the real truth of a situation is. According to the brochure, the service is free for students. In fact, students are charged at the same rate as everyone else.

7 On (the) one hand . . .. On the other hand . . . These expressions are used to introduce an opposite point in a discussion. (On the one hand,) if 1 take the job in Milan, I'll be able to go to the opera. On the other hand, if I take the job in Barcelona, I'll be able ro go ro the beach.

8 otherwise This is used to say what will happen if something else does not happen first. You have to choose your holiday carefully. Otherwise, you could be disappointed.

Sample answers

The following scripts were written by students. Read the Paper 2 general marking guidelines on the inside back cover, and use them to help you evaluate each answer and decide on its strong and weak points. Then read the comments given and the suggested band score, and compare your ideas.

Semi-formal letter (Part 1 )

Task You recently entered a competition for learners of English, and have just received a letter from the organisers of the competition. You have made some notes on the letter.

Congratulations! You have won first prize in our competition - a two-week trip to Vancouver or San Francisco.

Your prize includes / Direct flight?

* FREE return flight to the city of your choice * FREE two-week course at the Vancouver or

San Francisco Srhnol of Tnternational English Hours? Morninglafternoon?

* Two week's FREE accommodation with a I lily -Distance from school? Meals?

We need to know your choice of city, your preferred dates, and if you would like us to make any special arrangements for you.

1 Stay an extra week? We look forward to hearing from you. Once we have the information we will send you your tickets and further details.

Yours sincerely

Thompson

Jacky Thompson Competition Manager

Write a letter of between 120 and 150 1.a;z-35 - ?-

appropriate style. Do not write any posta' zcc-ess~s

\\'riting reference ( P a ~ e r 2)

Sample answer

Deav Mvs lhcmpml

7k.k you v e y much f o r the lettev. I m very p lmed tCIt I 've won the pvize. I would like t o go t o %n Fvancisco W 1 kave nevev been t o the USA befove. Howvev1 theve ave seveval w t i ~ I would like t o ask.

Fvst of all, I would Iike t o know wkethev K e v e h m flight is a direct flight ov not. I would like t o book A diveot flight W it is much move comf ovtable.

Secondly, I would Iike t o know how lmg we ave being +.ached evey d and if Keve are el- in

the morning ov the X enwon. Is iheve a diffevence between v m v e v avd Sm F v ~ i w coweming this point?

You wvote k t a fvee accommodation with a fmily, h e the included and/or do I b e

the oppohni iy t o swk by myself? P l e e let ma also know the distance fvm the school.

Fmally, I wmld like t o u k you if it is possible t o stay at school f ov or n t v a week. I f it is possible please let ma know the pvice I have t o pay. I Iike t o t h k y m in d v m e fw youv t a ~ ~ i s t ~ and 1 look fowavd t o heaving fvm ym sow,

Comments This is rather long, but there is no irrelevant information and the student answers all parts of the question. He makes a couple of grammatical mistakes (e.g. we are being teached; a free accommodation), but these don't cause problems in understanding the meaning. He uses quite a wide range of structures, although he tends to repeat I would like to know. Vocabulary is appropriate and ideas are organised in clear paragraphs. The style is sometimes too formal (e .g. concerning this point) but the letter would

I have a very positive effect on the reader.

Band 5

Writine reference (Paper 2)

Story

Task Your teacher has asked you to write a short story for the school's English language magazine. Your story must begin with the following words:

It was not easj but Carol knew she had to do it.

Write your story.

Sample answers B

: had t o I+ m5 COI- e a ~ but Carol kneu, 5he

i+. I n front of her the re tm g c iuef , ti

wa+ec that ~das cwning Very ,d -this

cubkc dinghy. behind her sh 5ac i W

pide explaining that the ~datef i s mly ab& Ga<m. h--t+-ecrnMe, he told t o b f0 \k group * the re a r e rxne dangeras places, where * h a v e -to t a k e special care. &ef t h a t , the g

smiled and cried: 'let's go!' PM one mbment, Carol ms +kinking of an cape. bUf C N

r a w r q rcrx was her bif-W~My pfesen-t frm he!

ice-, and they u f e all t h e r e She war * last ore &m g o t into fhe bcdt, and at da* at back of M She tried t o smile and join

m mhcr5 plea=iuce, w v e c , 5W w a n ' + very ~ 5 5 f u ~ . She closed her eyer and the boat set off. W e r a while, Carol began t o enj?

,-

t r ip I n fac t , it ms great fun. and a+ +re end. rrry a r m , Carol dGided t o bask a Mxf

trip tm u e k s late

I t was not easy, kt C~(ro1 knew 5he had t o do it. 5he W ~ S in Tiestte, Italy. She came there t o vi5,Y her 4riend. ffi5 name is 5te4ano who 5he met in their language xhool in ~ n y l m d , ~cfua l ly she didn't know about Italy until she met him. 50

she couldn't speak Itdian, w a not good a t Italian geography. A5 the -first mtake, she thought that Tiesfe was close t o hi5 house, but it was hi5 Jaulf. He l~ved in Tento, neb Verona. She should have used u di44erent hrporf. meste hrport was p i t e 5mall. She wasn't able to 4ind a person who can speak ~ q I i 5 h . ~s the b,3gest mistake, she c ~ l d n ' t call him!! She usually contacted with him by emhI5, 50 she d idn ' t know hcw to call. 5he tried to comm~nic~ted wifh Italian peop/e

W J Y ~ body Janguage m y time5 5he d idn ' t y,ve up. 14 she gave up, she cwldn ' t meet him. One hour past ... and she l e m e d how to call him!!

mentl~crlly she was able t o talk with him. Three hours later 5tefuno come t o her at the firport. 5he shouted 40r joy *5 teJm! ! I missed you!!"

Comments A This answers the question and gives some detail, B This is a lively story. There are quite a lot of and there is a clear beginning, middle and end. There grammar mistakes (e.g. who she met instead of and is some good accurate use of language (Behind her she had met him, she tried to communicated with). she could hear the guide explaining; After a while, However, the student also uses a range of structures Carol began to enjoy the trip) but there are several accurately (e.g. She should have used; She didn't give mistakes with reported speech (e.g. he told +% Carol's up.) There are some mistakes in vocabulary so that group that there are some dangerous places) and the meaning is not always clear (e.g. it was his fault other mistakes (e.g. a~ escape; a next trip). There is instead of He'd made a mistake; she learned how some use of direct speech to add interest and there is instead of she found out how). Linking of ideas and quite a good range of vocabulary, but the student sentences is not always clear. However, there is good has not divided the story into paragraphs. It has a use of direct speech and a strong ending which has a positive effect on the reader. positive effect on the reader. Band 4 Band 4 (low)

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Letter to a friend

Task You have received a letter from a pen friend who is planning to visit you in July. Write a letter to your pen friend, describing the activities you have planned for hislher visit. Give them

B advice on what to bring and ask about any special requests.

Write your letter. Do not write any postal addresses.

Sample answers

De,

Hi! ar Diego,

! How ar Thank yo u f o r \JC

letter! I'm very happy about your plan!

A OK! If \ J O ~ le t me know pur I time, I will come to you, a+ Narita

Dear Cawia, 20't. I've thought about our in ~ i m t o hew (*an you. I ' m so urpid tbt ya* .g Ya*r W v 'an. 1 know YOU really like football! t o - here hi5 m r . I kn t o SY t)** pu've d e 4 good 1 how about visiting stadiums of the decision. ~ r s t 4 all, I wmld like t o ve~bmmed ym m e

where ym rid Cup? YOU can visit a locker

s h \ d n ' t mi- w h 6 % t o g islnd. Ya* * b e different m in Yokohama International stadium

kt;v;tie &re. F O ~ aunple) if ya* wmld like %&+hi?. 1 .re the final was held, and you can

+hi, is & best cbice t o rala. Dar't faga t t o bvin) see ~ational

swim-. I dm'+ +hi& ~ i r d Pd* is r gmd p l ~ t o vis i t - I t 's v i t a tea

br*g 1 be t o be honest t o tbt. However if ya* w e rally I n .q not, bu t

~tev&irg in visitivy there I ~nr !d a* a r d . I sometimes there is a bay rain so

-17, it's +he best ti- ~SVW here i ya* e n i ~ the \Jou ha= to bring an umbrella. And

be big , g l e in h l y . %refwe) 1 W+ there are lots o f mosquitoes, you

fP. YOU. 1 will be vevy pleue t o S~OW YOU LOH ide re t i * r ) on big 91s bring a medical cream

in here! yourself against them I dm)+ tk** YOU naad t o brnq any spirl stuff. That's becwe ya* you have any special requ ,,,, . .,

CIIW them heve. ~ o n ' t fovget t o pr-e empv have an! let me witca;e fw y a r r shoppinp. I f ya* kna any plastimJwt u k ms. I'll do my krt t o solve them. I ' m l&i9 ~ O W A V ~ t o &ivy f v a ya* yin! Best wishe5)

Cave\

mug

pro.

Do

you

t r \ ~ I'm

autogra~

m membc

July, Jal

t o do i

looking forward to your syly arrd meeting

s o f love

J, please

t! ,. you in .I -,

know. I'

..--I.. .-.

Comments A This is a full answer to the question, with a fairly B All parts of the question are dealt with, in an good range of grammar, but there are quite a few informal style. There are some grammatical mistakes grammatical problems (e.g. recommend you some (e.g. there is a heavy rain) and problems in pronoun places where you instead of recommend some places use (e.g. I'll try to do it!) but the student uses tenses to you which; interesting in instead of interested in). accurately and shows a good range of vocabulary, Vocabulary problems sometimes make the meaning and the paragraphs are clear and well constructed. unclear (e.g . I can arrange the shopping table for The letter has a positive effect on the reader. you). Paragraphs and connecting words are well used Band 4 and the style is generally suitable for a letter from a friend. It has a satisfactory effect on the reader. Band 3

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Essay

Task

You have had a class discussion on what people do in their free time. Your teacher has now asked you to write an essay, giving your opinions on the following statement: Shopping has little value as a leisure activity B

Write your essay.

Sample answers

Does s h o p p P ~ have / iU/e v& 4s 4 hEe,&re ectivity?

f t h h k most peopk we keer, or, shopp.9

& is it 4+ vse.fir/.?

For -kt if we 4sk stvde3fs w k t they're goi?

to do ir, q 613 city, the 4esve.~s we */-t &a+

shop^'^', tad they doo't t h h k 4bovt pi? to

m u ~ e v m ~ q d &9ht-seei?. Most feurists go shoppi?

sometime ihh-d of to see the f4moUS pieces a d

so they doh'+ &re abovt p k e s they vi&.

Itowever, .peopk who shoppi3 /ike e w st49e

4 W Shbppiq, from w i d o w shoppi?, tqi*

e h e s 03, +hir,ki? if they shav/d 6uy o r W , So

h i * . The fim/ st4ge is to & satisfied w i t h 6%

what they kve * h t A their hove o r w r i * i t

h fro& of their mir ror /;Re a fqbhh3 show.

This qctivih/ is ~ v e d to be 4 c o ~ k t e k i m 4ctivify. I d a d , f -d 43 qr+ic/e i3 4 e ~ s p c r p e r

M / e d 'Shoppie9 is 4 w4y to d m ' . w e shov/d d/ vse

this oice re/m*tior, q d hoS. fee/ guilty. Doe'+ you

+hi* so.?

I believe that shopping can be one of the

impcftant things people do, like eatlng and

sleeping, and fcf some shopping is their chance 1 t o do their favourwe things like mlking and

mWng friends.

On the one hand, 1 think that is true -that

Shopping b no value in some lifestyles. P q k think of shopping only as a c h a w t o do LJhatevec they uant, and then i t is an escape from doing things s b l d do. I mean people ga shopping instead of do w k .

k v e r , others think of k t as a chance t,

meet %nnc friends ~ ~ h o you only see fcom time

t o time. I n addiim, it is ueful %me t o discuss every day problems - for example, if

have got xme pfoblems, in that shopping lime you might listen t o athers problem and

think that yoocs are notking c a n p a c e d t o

%ifs It can make a break frm every day

L30CIC pfeze~e and 50 it is valuable .fcf some

uho have a hard job and life5tyle. - I n conclusion, it 's true that hying -thky. has lii-tle vale, but people ace different, hich

means that shopping uXII be ~~~~~s for some.

Comments

These answers are both Band 4, for different reasons. A This has clear organisation, with paragraphs giving B This answers the question clearly and uses a wide points for and against the statement. However, the range of vocabulary and some good expressions (e.g. first sentence just repeats the task. There are some think that yours are nothing compared to theirs). good expressions (e.g. i f we ask ... the answers are However, there are grammatical mistakes (e.g. almost always 'shopping') but also some grammatical instead of do work). The style is appropriate. The mistakes (e.g. go shopping sometime instead of D conclusion clearly returns to the question and gives a see). There is quite a good range of topic-related nice summary of the writer's opinion. It has a positive vocabulary, but the style is too informal in places (e.g. effect on the reader.

Don't you think so?). It has a positive effect on the reader.

Report

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Task

The owner of the school where you study English has decided to make some changes to the school classrooms. He has asked for ideas from students about what should be done to make the classrooms better places to study in. Write a report making suggestions for how the classrooms could be improved.

Write your report.

Sample answer ~ntroduction %is report is h suggest what we need t o w* the classrooms better in our school. 1 asj(ed students for their ideas.

B a c ~ a r ~ n d s i t ~ a t i o n W ~ A Y it's need t o be insi& a good schml classrooms is t h a t tke "d all have all tke e i ment students mi h t need start in from tke essent~al

BUP 8 . . things l i ~ e chair, bwboards, Jirishing with accersmles l ~ ~ e tehvisi~ns.

h+,ystions 1 cerfainl believe t h a t t w o things need t o s t a r t our pla* t o imprwe tke 8 school c~assrooms, t b are e n e and ood wm emen+. M idea o f 8 . b . a 8 b improving the classroms IS t o s t a r t w~th what we have and see what weds t o be repared a d what has t o be thrown awa8 and replaold with a new

ipment and some com~+ers tha t the st.ctdents might need also having a 7. . wss~ve h b e r r a ~ is om of the m e i*portant things t h a t students repes t . hati* and air conditi onin are necessaT h wKe tke 27 a ~ e s p h e r e in tke cfassrooms w . 8

"d Personal opinion 1% wnclision, the chance o f having a good chsrooolr ~ O O K S ea? h-m a distance, in fact it isn't, a d t h a t we must t t o find the balance betwan having a v e ~ $ood school a d not rpenzng too much.

Comments

This report makes some relevant points, but the style is more suitable for a composition than a report. It would be much better in bullet points. It is not easy to identify the main suggestions because of problems with sentence linking and punctuation. My idea of ... is to start with what we have is good. The problem is the senteqce is too long and needs splitting up, e.g. My idea o f improving the classrooms is to 9a.r w f h what we have. Then we can see . . . . There are some problems with pass;..^ 'grms !e.g. what it's need instead of what is needed) but also some good express,.s9s 'e.?. t9 9z.t with what we have; we must try to find the balance between). ' h e r-:en: hzs a gmd range of vocabulary although this is not always appropriately 25- r : -xz-..f-; czsy' and there are some spelling mistakes

-. - (e.g. repared, liberra?, . '1 -1: 1 9: zc:-: ezec on the reader. Band 3

Writing reference (Paper 2)

Article

Task You have seen this advertisement in a magazine for young people.

... I'd love to have : Write an article about something : : you would like to have. saying : : why you would like to have it : : and what difference it would :

make to your life.

: The writer of the best article : will win a lap-top computer. :

:.*..................*..@ Write your article

Sample answer

I ' d love t o have a lot of money a~though I think money is not a perfect so/ut;on Of Cour5e not! However, if I had enough money, 1 could do a plenty d t h i q 5 which I w w t o do. Above 1 want t o study in other Co~ntrie5, because. H i5 a good chance t o develop my ab;l;tie5. In this cme, 1 don' t need to worry a b W the fee of education in ny /;Ye I can only concentrate on 5tudying as long as I d o my best. 5econd/y, I w o ~ d like t o prepare a /ove/y k ~ 5 e For my parents. iilthough they didn' t 5ay t o me at all, I t h k the work d electric service5 is 50 hard t o conijflue a+ their age5 within 10 y e w SereJoe, I hope

1 could ride then r e l a and enjoy their liFe. o n the other hand. 1 can he/p the ofher people who are suf4ering 4rom lack d Food, illne55 and so on When 1 saw a W prTrmme which announced those people i stories, I ihoU3ht ;{ I were them I wou/d ge t rea/ly depressed. 5ometime5, money can be used in a bad way, but if I Utn a rich person, I wi l l spend then -

on W only Tor me, but I dso y,ve an opp ortUn,Yy to others.

Comments

This answer gives relevant information and answers the question. There is quite a good range of structures and vocabulary but these are not always used very accurately (e.g. If I am a rich person, I will spend them on not only for me instead of I f I were rich, I wouldn't just spend the money on myself). It is also difficult to understand exactly what she wants to say about her parents in the line Although they didn't say to me at all, I think .... The paragraphs are well planned but there are mistakes with linking words (e.g. On the other hand instead of, e.g. As well as that) and with punctuation. There is a mixture of informal language (e.g. Of course not!) and formal language (e.g. Therefore). It has a satisfactory effect on the reader.

Band 3

Writing reference (Paper 11

Review

Task

Reviews needed!

We need a young person's perspective on films today. Write us a review of your favorite film. Include information on the story, characters and any special features

of the film and say why you would recommend the film to other people. The best review will be published in next month's edition of the magazine.

Write your review.

in 2001.

It is set in an Italian city in -the same time in UhiCh

actof5 phq in fact, -We d i r ~ t o f k ppo& U t a b a +&e pc(c of p~opk'5 Yh Tre di fell 0s aban

1-he c&i5 of two diffeierrr generations WCled by -We

diffi~kty of grad q and take -theif ies-i

C h the one haw, W e are - t h ~ q years OM people think @i% IiU an i w a n t c h a y of l i f e but sad and jeriou5, mrefoce +hey are very ffi9Me"ed of doing W,

pfeferfing an affair Wh e U t-o ~olrng

couple's pc&ems.

cdWr hand, fifhj years old people are frig~ened of gra3ing old.

I Wink -n?e 5toiy 'b re% t o p i ~ l and a w W ~ $ X a d

5 i r u a ~ , the actors' p e c f ~ r m n c e ia really goOd, the d i a w are f a t and accurate. plrmac~h ir, a gr-t hrn I mu,, admrt that ir is a bir too 5hovred, 'cmJt this is

Muino's s 9 k .

A STOCLJ $eat actoc4 ard good dialops and edir

'C'UW Ba~io' u reny i r r t -ec~ t l y , rot Wing at- all

f iy f av~ r , ye f i l m i5 cnlled '14 only ', / j ' s j k best romantic film I I v e ever seen.

I

i t2 5ef in London &d ah;ut a &d-dorl;nj

kJsine55man and lovely viol;n;5j wornan. S,e m& I

"5 f00 k J ~ y fo tdke c&e hi5 love. He thinks work '3 More imporfdnt than his ~ r / ~ r ; e n d . On ?he concert of her yraduation he meefs a dr~ver I

? a s u;tL L;m about their /me ffe reaiise5 j 5mei'hi.s M it 2 too a t e b e c a r Air j , r / r m d .

die5 by co accident. ffe re9rej5 everyjhiq, & wrprisifl3ly there ;5 a great c h m e d. tIv;ng w;fh her ayah. finally he C& apprec;aje her,

I "0", he k.5 to die instead d hi5 gir1Jr;end.

1 have seen I? 5 fime5. until / 5~ i t 3-4 jives

if W m jU3f love story with 5frm9e sijua+;on, kJj lasf fime, 1 Can yeel c k a c t e r 2 fee/;q5 30 ;f

a really romanfic +;tin. ?he ploi and jhe 5 0 9

the actre53 W&J fant f i t ic %e story C J J / ~

be a bif rcrfiJ;c;al and /a,-fefched 801 ;f y~ ~ O C U ~ on c&&?fer15 feet. ~ n 3 5 yoci C& be g,ven a

9ood precept >on 't calcu/ate ywr loye, ju3 j appreciate her!

-. -----.-___

Comments A This review is a bit long, has some style oroblems B This is a bit long, but is organised and easy to and is not always easy to follow. On the one hand I follow. The style and paragraphing are both generally On the other hand does not link well to b * . ~ d2erent appropriate, and the writer has given her opinion. generations. There is a good range of vocaSv'a-; There is some interesting vocabulary although some (plausible picture, taking responsibility, ~ ? c z c & words are misused, e.g. precept. The sentences are situation) but, some words are misused, e.g. :x s - ~ ' e , but there is a range of structures including shouted. Pere are basic grammatical mistakes, presen: oedect and rnodals. Mistakes do not usually e.g. -ing fo- a?er prepositions (difficulty of gm.5. --2 CO-munication. The review generally has a up). The re\p~bn; cqiv has a satisfactory effect on t-2 i?c9?: e"ect on the reader. reader. Band 3 Band 3

Paper 2 Writing: general marking guidelines

Both Parts of the Writing paper carry equal marks. When marking, examiners use the general assessment guidelines below for both Parts, as well as a task-specific mark scheme for each question on the paper.

Band 5 Answers the question completely and makes some original points Uses a wide range of grammatical structures at this level with almost no mistakes Uses a wide range of vocabulary appropriately Uses clear paragraphs with well-organised ideas Uses a variety of appropriate connecting words Uses the correct style for this type of writing throughout Has a very positive effect on the reader

Band 4 Answers the question giving enough detail to be effective Uses a good range of grammatical structures at this level with few basic mistakes Uses a wide range of vocabulary, mostly appropriately Uses paragraphs with logically organised ideas Uses suitable connecting words appropriately Uses the right style for this type of writing most of the time Has a positive effect on the reader

Band 3 Answers the question Uses a satisfactory range of grammatical structures at this level, with some errors Uses a satisfactory range of vocabulary, with some errors in appropriacy Organises ideas into paragraphs, though not always clearly - Uses some simple connecting words Mostly uses the right style for this type of writing, though there may be some lapses Has a satisfactory effect on the reader

Band 2 Does not answer the question fully, andlor is not always relevant to the question Uses a limited range of grammatical structures, with errors which interfere with communication Uses a limited range of vocabulary, with errors that cause difficulty in understanding Does not organise ideas into paragraphs Uses very few connecting words, or does not use them correctly Uses a style that is not appropriate for this type of writing Has an unsatisfactory effect on the reader and does not communicate clearly

Band 1 Omits some parts of the question and/or is irrelevant Uses a narrow range of grammatical structures, with many basic errors Uses a narrow range of vocabulary, with errors that prevent understanding Does not organise ideas at all Does not use connecting words Does not demonstrate any understanding of the style and format needed for this lype uT wrilir~y Has a very negative effect on the reader -