Mischief & fortune

Table of contents Table of contents Table of contents

The 5 top 2’sThe 5 top 2’sThe 5 top 2’s

The Fitness SectionThe Fitness SectionThe Fitness Section

The Fashion SectionThe Fashion SectionThe Fashion Section

The Cover StoryThe Cover StoryThe Cover Story

The VillainousThe Villainous

FiveFive

The 5 Top Five The 5 Top Five

Worst and Worst and

Misguided People & Misguided People &

Things You’ve Ever Things You’ve Ever

Come AcrossCome Across

HHH aving swindled many aving swindled many aving swindled many

millions of dollars millions of dollars millions of dollars

from Wall Street investors and from Wall Street investors and from Wall Street investors and

fools alike, this man represents fools alike, this man represents fools alike, this man represents

the epitome of selfishness and the epitome of selfishness and the epitome of selfishness and

greed. Luckily he was stopped be-greed. Luckily he was stopped be-greed. Luckily he was stopped be-

fore his greed got in the way of fore his greed got in the way of fore his greed got in the way of

overall progress, to bad his image overall progress, to bad his image overall progress, to bad his image

has inspired countless more on to-has inspired countless more on to-has inspired countless more on to-

day’s Wall Street.day’s Wall Street.day’s Wall Street. Possessing a nationalistic Possessing a nationalistic Possessing a nationalistic

ideology that made him a ideology that made him a ideology that made him a

legend, this man epito-legend, this man epito-legend, this man epito-

mized the American of mized the American of mized the American of

the mid 19th century. De-the mid 19th century. De-the mid 19th century. De-

spite wanting the best for spite wanting the best for spite wanting the best for

his growing nation, he cre-his growing nation, he cre-his growing nation, he cre-

ated a series of events ated a series of events ated a series of events

that would lead to his that would lead to his that would lead to his

down fall.down fall.down fall.

G o r d o n G e k k o

Bill the Butcher

Reapers

A sentient race of starships stretch-

ing over 2 km in height, these

“machines” show just how far and

how powerful technology can go and

how destructive it can be. Not much

is known about the machines except

that they are found in myths and

legends throughout galactic culture.

A very cunning and cold A very cunning and cold

individual, this man individual, this man

represents the caged animal represents the caged animal

found literally within the found literally within the

personalities of today’s typical personalities of today’s typical

cubicle bound male. Although cubicle bound male. Although

his methods were harsh and his methods were harsh and

his vocabulary amusing his his vocabulary amusing his

idea was to liberate the world idea was to liberate the world

from its materialistic shackles from its materialistic shackles

and make society new again. and make society new again.

Maybe next time.Maybe next time.

Tyler Durden

No need to specify certain individuals as their

statements and beliefs are spread across them and

the 21st century Republican Party. In short, they all

want more for the wealthy at any cost, little to no

change in progressive ideas and concepts nor do

they see “outside the bubble” as comedian Bill

Maher puts it so clearly.

The Collective Republican 2012 Nominees

Ted NugentTed NugentTed Nugent

A notoriously conservative “musician”, A notoriously conservative “musician”, A notoriously conservative “musician”,

Ted Nugent has made graphic remarks Ted Nugent has made graphic remarks Ted Nugent has made graphic remarks about almost everyone from President about almost everyone from President about almost everyone from President

Obama and Hilary Clinton to animal Obama and Hilary Clinton to animal Obama and Hilary Clinton to animal

rights activists. Before making any rights activists. Before making any rights activists. Before making any

sort of remark about others, he should sort of remark about others, he should sort of remark about others, he should

remember how he dodged the draft of remember how he dodged the draft of remember how he dodged the draft of

the 70’s and that his career is...less the 70’s and that his career is...less the 70’s and that his career is...less

than desirable.than desirable.than desirable. Lindsay LohanLindsay Lohan

A once gifted and charming A once gifted and charming

actress now turned bag of actress now turned bag of

chemicals, this specimen repre-chemicals, this specimen repre-

sents how Hollywood changes the sents how Hollywood changes the

face of innocent young lives and face of innocent young lives and

turns them into...whatever Ms. turns them into...whatever Ms.

Lohan happens to be.Lohan happens to be.

Tara ReidTara ReidTara Reid

Much like Ms. Lohan, a once promising Much like Ms. Lohan, a once promising Much like Ms. Lohan, a once promising

young actress turned even bugger bag young actress turned even bugger bag young actress turned even bugger bag of chemicals and artificial parts, Ms. of chemicals and artificial parts, Ms. of chemicals and artificial parts, Ms.

Reid has not only become another Lohan Reid has not only become another Lohan Reid has not only become another Lohan

but has also been in some of the least but has also been in some of the least but has also been in some of the least

entertaining films of all time. She is entertaining films of all time. She is entertaining films of all time. She is

also our 3rd worst “celebrity” along also our 3rd worst “celebrity” along also our 3rd worst “celebrity” along

with the former two.with the former two.with the former two.

Jennifer LopezJennifer LopezJennifer Lopez

A once charming and A once charming and A once charming and

utterly euphoric utterly euphoric utterly euphoric

singer now turned sell singer now turned sell singer now turned sell

out and “gold digger”, out and “gold digger”, out and “gold digger”,

Jennifer Lopez has Jennifer Lopez has Jennifer Lopez has

been inducted into the been inducted into the been inducted into the

“Selling Out to money “Selling Out to money “Selling Out to money

and Husband Hopping and Husband Hopping and Husband Hopping

Hall of Fame”Hall of Fame”Hall of Fame”

CuisineCuisineCuisine

Ginger Snap Cookie Sandwiches With Ginger Snap Cookie Sandwiches With Ginger Snap Cookie Sandwiches With

Cardamom Almond Ice Cream Cardamom Almond Ice Cream Cardamom Almond Ice Cream

Chefs lately seem to be whipping up a Chefs lately seem to be whipping up a Chefs lately seem to be whipping up a

goat cheesecake with cherries jubilee. goat cheesecake with cherries jubilee. goat cheesecake with cherries jubilee.

But this slightly spicy ice cream sandwich But this slightly spicy ice cream sandwich But this slightly spicy ice cream sandwich

seems tantalizing. Mellow but bold and seems tantalizing. Mellow but bold and seems tantalizing. Mellow but bold and

great!great!great!

Tamarind Glazed Chicken Breast Tamarind Glazed Chicken Breast Tamarind Glazed Chicken Breast

With Barbecue Baked Beans With Barbecue Baked Beans With Barbecue Baked Beans

The bold aroma of a glazed chicken is The bold aroma of a glazed chicken is The bold aroma of a glazed chicken is

enough to water the mouths of the enough to water the mouths of the enough to water the mouths of the

heartiest folk. In combination with an heartiest folk. In combination with an heartiest folk. In combination with an

equally bold baked bean combo, this dish equally bold baked bean combo, this dish equally bold baked bean combo, this dish

is well worth a try.is well worth a try.is well worth a try.

Chilled MangoChilled MangoChilled Mango

&&&

Texas Clover Honey Soup Texas Clover Honey Soup Texas Clover Honey Soup

A strange mix of mango with local A strange mix of mango with local A strange mix of mango with local

Texan ingredients, this soup is known to Texan ingredients, this soup is known to Texan ingredients, this soup is known to

have a delightful spice with a multitude have a delightful spice with a multitude have a delightful spice with a multitude

of other rather sweet and mellow fla-of other rather sweet and mellow fla-of other rather sweet and mellow fla-

vors.vors.vors.

Chicken Fried Bacon On A Bleu Chicken Fried Bacon On A Bleu Chicken Fried Bacon On A Bleu

Cheese Biscuit Cheese Biscuit Cheese Biscuit

Typically, anything that is chicken fried Typically, anything that is chicken fried Typically, anything that is chicken fried

would be found at a state fair along with would be found at a state fair along with would be found at a state fair along with

other greasy unmentionables. However, other greasy unmentionables. However, other greasy unmentionables. However,

this one is actually quite the black sheep this one is actually quite the black sheep this one is actually quite the black sheep

of that group being served alongside the of that group being served alongside the of that group being served alongside the

Fitness Routines

By: Bane

Readers!! while I was busy breaking Batman I found these

to be super nice! These do work and are backed by sci-

ence, Nightwing told me this too, so try them out and see

what works.

The Routine:

Monday-Chest & Shoulders

Saturday/Sunday– rest you worm!!

Bench Press 3 sets 10 reps

Incline/Decline Bench Press 3 sets 10 reps

Dumbbell Press 3 sets 8 reps

Dumbbell Fly’s 3 sets 10 reps

Tuesday-ARMS!!!!!

Wednesday– back & legs

Lat Pull Downs 3 sets 8 reps

Wide Grip Pull Downs 3 sets 8 reps

Cable Pulls 3 sets 10 reps for all cables

Squats 3 sets 8 reps 1 minute rest in between

Lunges 3 sets 20 reps

Thursday– ARMS!!!!!

Friday– REPEAT MONDAY!

Channel The Anger! By: Bane

Readers! After watching Tom Hardy play myself in

The Dark Knight Rises, I thought for once to let you

all in on my power! Here are some basic tips on how

YOU can be as powerful as me.

UNDERSTAND AND CONTROL

THE SOURCE!

Rage starts when your wants

aren’t met. That means feeling

threatened, being let down,

pushed on, lack of recogni-

tion...identify these and take

control of it!

HARNESS THE POWER!

When someone fails you, tell them loud and clear why this is not acceptable & how you would have done it!

Evaluate the action!

I hate to say it, but after you make an action, look at

what you did and see what the result is. Good or bad?

It’s hip to fight crime!

...Or cause it?

I t was a sunny cloudless day in Greenwich when I sat down with

New York City’s latest and dare I might say strangest group of

crime fighters I’ve ever come across. Actually the weather was quite

dreary but any who, I sat down with the leaders of New York’s very

own group of crime fighting hipsters known as The Knights of Green-

wich Village. Crime fighting hipsters? “Oh you’re too funny Joker”

some may say, but this is quite the truth. The hipsters in question,

The Knights of Greenwich Village, are an increasingly growing group of

vigilante’s known for brutality that would make even the dictators of

days long past say “Oh, those guys are crazy!” Well the duo leaders,

Tyler Negron and Jake Gomez, very clearly live up to that title as seen

in the following interview.

Joker: Hey guys! I’m a big fan of your work, though I might want to lay off the thugs…save some for old Joker here eh!?. Jake: Yea, I figured there was enough to go around…but if you say so. Joker: You’re convinced pretty easy I see… Tyler: *coughs* Joker: Oh I’m sorry my dear, let’s get on with this shall we? Tyler: Yes please. Joker: Alrighty, what made you two decide to start up The Knights of Greenwich Village? (KGV)

Jake: Well, long story short, we were tired of being mis-treated; so we decided to do something about it and came up with KGV. Tyler: Exactly, the N.Y.P.D does do a good job at times and I love them for what they do, but at other times…they never seem to take peo-ple like us seriously. Rather than let our kind… Joker: Hipsters? Tyler: No, I mean young peo-ple expressing themselves in today’s chaotic world. Joker: Mhmmm right, go on.

Tyler: Rather than let our kind be pushed around and beaten by local thugs, we would turn the tables on them and show the world that we are NOT to be crossed.

Joker: Well I’ll be darned little lady *laughing*.

Well, you two have done just that, New York did experience the lowest crime rate since it was a colony; but after a while some New Yorkers now feel that, YOU’RE now the thugs that you sought to get rid of. Crime in greater New York now looks KGV driven, funded, and all those other adjectives I can’t seem to spell.

Tyler: Quite the contrary actually, while I do admit that our tactics are not …suited for everyone, they get the job done and sends a message. In regards to things allegedly being influenced by us, most of it is NOT true. Much like how Guy Fawkes’ image is used in rebellion to an establishment that some don’t like, the KGV has been used as a mascot for the stupidest of things.

Jake: I mean seriously, did you see the groups of kids in Union Square the other week? Ridiculous! Chanting all those things they said…using our name no less and then the media has the nerve to say it was all our fault! We do not endorse government overthrows like the old “Occupy” movement once did, we just want peace in the metropolitan area.

Joker: Alrighty, next question! Once crime is gone from New York, what do you intend to do? Fight more crime elsewhere? Find a real job perhaps?

Jake: Well, we hope to maintain the peace form no gangs and no crime. Hey, maybe we’ll go into stopping

online crimes…

Joker: Maybe expand into New Jersey, lord knows they need it *laughs*

Tyler: Yes, maybe.

Joker: Tell me about yourselves, I’m just dying to find out myself.

Jake: Well, I was born and raised here in New York, lived in Putnam County for a while, and now I live here with the real KGV members and Tyler over here.

Tyler: Same here, New Yorker born and raised. Both of us are from good families I might add. Other than that…

Joker: BORING! Where’s the action, where’s the drama? I’m certain you two have seen you’re fair share of it.

Jake: Yes yes, while there were up’s and down’s we never really had Mi-chael Bay-esque adventures nor did we have overly dramatic episodes take place.

Joker: Well anyways, last question guys. What do you think is in your future? Maybe New York’s future in regards to crime? What would us mortals do without you?

Tyler: The future of the KGV is es-sentially dependant on crime and vice versa.

Jake: Where there is crime, there is us to stop it. When there is none, we’ll be going back to everyday rou-tine until crime rears its ugly head once more...

Mischief &

Fortune

Table of Contents

The 5 Top Three’s

Cover Story

The Inspirational 5: The 5 top

Five’s You Should Encounter

“V”

A charming fellow of sorts, this hero sought

to break the shackles of a tyranny thwart-

ing to ruin a great people. His followers

have sought to spread this concept of his

throughout the world from North Africa to

the Middle East and shown just how power-

ful “the people” are.

What is known is literature and drama as an “antiWhat is known is literature and drama as an “anti--

hero” this fellow liberated mankind from the whim hero” this fellow liberated mankind from the whim

of the Greek gods. Oddly enough, this wasn’t even of the Greek gods. Oddly enough, this wasn’t even

remotely close to his original goal; none the less, remotely close to his original goal; none the less,

he has given the men in his universe a choice, a he has given the men in his universe a choice, a

choice that is not over seen by deities but by choice that is not over seen by deities but by

themselves.themselves.

Kratos

Spawn

Another famous “anti-hero”, this grue-

some individual was once a puppet for

the demons of the underworld until he

broke his ties and turned the tables on

his puppet masters. Spawn puts his

readers on “the edge of the seats” with

almost every action he takes. Luckily,

non have fallen off their seats!

Nathan Drake A dashing young adventurer, Na-

than Drake has traveled the world

in an Indiana Jones inspired treas-

ure hunt turned “save the world”

experience. His charismatic, boyish,

and often sarcastic attitude has

earned him a top spot on many hero

awards.

Female SheppardFemale Sheppard

“Hero of the Citadel”, “Conqueror of the “Hero of the Citadel”, “Conqueror of the

Collectors”, and “Savior of the Galaxy”. Collectors”, and “Savior of the Galaxy”.

These are just some of the titles given These are just some of the titles given

to the most driven protagonist I’ve had to the most driven protagonist I’ve had

the pleasure of meeting. Her charm can the pleasure of meeting. Her charm can

sway the opinions of entire galactic sway the opinions of entire galactic

species, her wrath can be felt from species, her wrath can be felt from

Earth to the Perseus Veil; in short, she Earth to the Perseus Veil; in short, she

is found in the hearts and souls of all is found in the hearts and souls of all

individuals and inspires them to go above individuals and inspires them to go above

and beyond.and beyond.

No Clear Mind-Dream is

Destiny

A beautiful combination of

post rock and ambience, this

title seems to inspire the

dreams of its listeners, or at

the least, allows them to day

dream.

Afflitus

Initially not a fan of “metal”

music, I was somewhat

cautious in approaching this

group of musicians. Upon

listening to their music

however, I feel empowered

to rise up and rebel; of

course we may already know

of my work.

The Tony Danza Tap Dance

Extravaganza

As with the former group I

was hesitant to listen to this

music, sue in part to their

very amusing name. However,

their music empowers me

more so and features though

provoking lyrics.

40 Winks-Melancholia

This duo of “D’Js” as some

call them, have created some

truly unique blends of hip hop

inspired beats with smooth

rhythms. I hate to sound like

a broken record, but inspires

is what I hear and feel in

this title.

The Cancel-5 year

As with the remainder of

this most inspiring list, this

one brings fourth my inner

“fashionista” as many would

call it.

Top 5 Inspirational Works of Music

Brad Pitt

This dashing young fellow

does more than just woo the

masses with striking facial

features and chiseled pecs.

In fact, he has been noted

for helping and funding the

building of brand new homes

for residents of New Or-

leans’s Ninth Ward district in

the aftermath of hurricane

Katrina. These aren’t just

your run of the mill trailers,

much to the dismay of

F.E.M.A, they are full family

sized homes that are de-

signed in such ways as to not

topple in the event of another

Katrina-like storm.

Anne Hathaway

This most lovely starlet has

championed L.G.B.T rights for

a few recent years and has

actually “quit” Catholicism for

her gay older brother. She’s

quoted from British G.Q

“"The whole family converted

to Episcopalianism after my

elder brother came out”

"Why should I support an or-

ganization that has a limited

view of my beloved brother?"

While M&F does not advocate

anti-religious behavior, it

does open up a new train of

thought, simply put, instead of supporting those who don’t support me, I’ll just take my-self and leave.

Oprah Winfrey

On average, Oprah makes ap-

proximately $260 million per

year, and her net worth to-

tals at more than $1 billion.

Last year, Oprah donated

more than $50 million to vari-

ous charities, including her

own Oprah's Angel Network,

which provides education,

health care and advocacy for

women and children world-

wide.

Matt Damon Matt Damon

Damon has been involved Damon has been involved

in campaigns aimed at in campaigns aimed at

stopping the Darfur war. stopping the Darfur war.

He is also the founder of He is also the founder of

H2O Africa which H2O Africa which

merged with Water Part-merged with Water Part-

ners to create water.org ners to create water.org

that was addressing that was addressing

the water crisis in Af-the water crisis in Af-

rica.rica.

Damon is also a board Damon is also a board

member of Tonic Mail member of Tonic Mail

stopper whose work is to stopper whose work is to

try and stop the flow of try and stop the flow of

junk mails and cutting of junk mails and cutting of

trees to conserve the en-trees to conserve the en-

vironment.vironment.

Damon’s support towards Damon’s support towards

the efforts of One Cam-the efforts of One Cam-

paign in the fight against paign in the fight against

Aids and poverty in third Aids and poverty in third

world countries has been world countries has been

immense.immense.

An ambassador of ONEX-An ambassador of ONEX-

ONE he has been fight-ONE he has been fight-

ing to improve the lives ing to improve the lives

of children at home in of children at home in

Canada, United States Canada, United States

and around the worldand around the world

Sir Elton JohnSir Elton John

The man has accumulated The man has accumulated

a lot of wealth which he a lot of wealth which he

has been using to sup-has been using to sup-

port the fit against Aids port the fit against Aids

in the world. Through the in the world. Through the

Elton John AIDS Foun-Elton John AIDS Foun-

dation, he has raised dation, he has raised

over than $125 million to over than $125 million to

support programs in the support programs in the world.world.

Fitness with Night Wing Fitness with Night Wing

Hey readers, for this months’ issue I’ll be telling you Hey readers, for this months’ issue I’ll be telling you

all about the latest routines and diet tips that I’ve all about the latest routines and diet tips that I’ve

found most helpful. Yes, these are legitimate and yes, found most helpful. Yes, these are legitimate and yes,

they do work if you stick to them. Reading many other they do work if you stick to them. Reading many other

fitness related articles, I’ve seen that it’s much too fitness related articles, I’ve seen that it’s much too

long to read through or even understand, so to help long to read through or even understand, so to help

you guys out I’ve put down a short chart of my you guys out I’ve put down a short chart of my

“normal” routine and some miscellaneous points in my “normal” routine and some miscellaneous points in my

diet and supplementations.diet and supplementations.

Believe it or not, carbs can be your friends! So long as you know how lieve it or not, carbs can be your friends! So long as you know how

to properly measure how much you take in, below is a high and low carb to properly measure how much you take in, below is a high and low carb

diet to help get those pounds off.diet to help get those pounds off.

High Carb Day

Low Carb Day

Meal 1 7 am 2 pieces of Wheat Toast

6 Scrambled Eggs

1 glass of Skim Milk

Meal 2 9 am 1 Whey Protein Shake

Meal 3 12 pm 6-8 Ounce Turkey Breast

1/2 Cups Brown Rice

1/2 Cups Vegetables

Meal 4 (post workout) 3 pm 40 Gram Protein Shake

1 Banana

1 Gatorade

Meal 5 6 pm 1 scoop of any casein protein 1 glass of skim milk 1 Cups Vegetable

Meal 6 9 pm 2 Cups Cottage Cheese

Meal 1 7 am

1 Cup Oatmeal

4 Scrambled Eggs

1 Glass of Skim Milk

Meal 2 9 am 1 Whey Protein Shake

Meal 3 12 pm

6-8 Ounce Lean Fish

1 Cups Brown Rice

1 Cups Vegetable

Meal 4 (post

workout) 3 pm

40 Gram Protein Shake

1 Banana

1 Gatorade

Meal 5 6 pm

1 Baked Potato

8-10 Ounce Steak

1 Cups Vegetable

Meal 6 9 pm 2 Cups Cottage Cheese

The Everyday Man:

The True Superhero’s Fighting crime in the mean dirty streets of Gotham is

nothing short of a hard days’ work. The criminals are

tenacious and the crime rampant, something that only

a “super hero” can seem handle. I bring to you readers

just one of the real super hero’s of the world, not of a

comic book based work of fiction. The everyday man.

I recently sat down with F.D.N.Y potential Roberto

Negron as he tells me his story of rising from living a

hardened life New York City’s Bronx county up to his

upcoming test to be a fire fighter. We also go into his

personal life as he shows us a side of the super hero

that only a select few have seen.

Batman: Good evening, Mr. Negron, it’s a pleasure to

sit down and talk with you today.

Roberto: Thanks Batman, it’s a pleasure to be here.

Batman: So you came up from a good family in New

York’s Bronx county and so far have aspirations of be-

ing in the F.D.N.Y. Why is that?

Roberto: To keep a long story short Batman, I’ve just

wanted to do some good in this world for a long time.

Seeing you do your thing out there is nothing short of

extraordinary, I’d like to do something like that...in

my own attainable way of course.

Batman: Batman: Well that’s great if I do say so myself. It always Well that’s great if I do say so myself. It always

helps the world when we have fine people helping each helps the world when we have fine people helping each

other in their own way.other in their own way.

RobertoRoberto: And to be honest, it’s not even that hard, you : And to be honest, it’s not even that hard, you

just have to get up, look in the mirror, and say to yourself just have to get up, look in the mirror, and say to yourself

“ You need to do something today!”. Doesn’t matter what it “ You need to do something today!”. Doesn’t matter what it

is you do, just get up and do it.is you do, just get up and do it.

Batman: Batman: In your case, this is doing good for N.Y.C by be-In your case, this is doing good for N.Y.C by be-

ing a fire fighter?ing a fire fighter?

Roberto: Roberto: Exactly!Exactly!

Batman: To wrap this up, I’ve recently heard you have Batman: To wrap this up, I’ve recently heard you have

relations with a certain Jake Gomez of the Knights of relations with a certain Jake Gomez of the Knights of

Greenwich Village, what is that all about?Greenwich Village, what is that all about?

Roberto: Roberto: (ha(ha--ha) Nothing bad if that’s what you’re think-ha) Nothing bad if that’s what you’re think-

ing, we’re second cousins. He tells me of all the bad press ing, we’re second cousins. He tells me of all the bad press

him & his group get….they’re not bad people, just mis-him & his group get….they’re not bad people, just mis-

guided and missguided and miss--judgedjudged

Batman: Batman: I understand, well thank you for giving the time I understand, well thank you for giving the time

to sit down for this issue, M&F wish you the best of luck to sit down for this issue, M&F wish you the best of luck

in your endeavors.in your endeavors.