1

Hello everyone, well, this month has certainly been very quiet, Phil, Mum and myself have

been busy up at the Mandurah Bowling Club gardening, getting rid of white ant infested

shrubs and trees, then replanting new shrubs and flowers, repainting the score boards,

so been busy enough not to go mad. It is a blessing to be able to go up there with no one

else there.

Hoping that everyone is enjoying my extra efforts on Facebook to give you a few laughs,

I do enjoy trolling through for suitable things to put on our page at the moment. Also,

thanks to the people who contribute too, especially our Doris!! Brilliant boogie Doris!

Also thanks to Ian Foster who contributed with some tips this month.

Where is the purple puddytat ……..

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE – we were so lucky to have the Easter Bunny delivering up

our way in the Village. Good on you Evelyn, we needed a big smile missing our families.

Thank you so much.

ARCADIA WATERS MANDURAH

VILLAGE VOICE

Articles must be received by Kerry Adams via email kewietoo@bigpond.com

before the 25th of each month.

MAY 2020

CCC

2

MONKEY BUSINESS

A 17-year-old boy who works part-time at Pizza Hut drives up to park in front of the house in a

beautiful Porsche. Naturally, his parents know that there’s no way he earned enough with his after-

school job to buy such a car. “Where did you get that car?” his mom and dad screamed in shock.

“I bought it today,” replied the teen calmly.

“With what money young man?” his mom demands. “We know how much a Porsche costs and you

cannot afford it!”

“Well, it’s used, and I got a good deal” says the boy, “This one cost me 20 dollars.”

“Who on earth would sell a car like that for 20 dollars?!”

“The woman up the street,” the boy replies. “I don’t know her name–she just moved in. She ordered

a pizza and when I delivered it to her, she asked me if I wanted to buy a Porsche for 20 dollars.”

The boy’s dad and mom hurry over to their new neighbour’s house, ready to demand an explanation.

Curiously, their new neighbour is calmly planting flowers in her front yard.

“I’m the father of the kid you just sold a sports car to for $20,” the dad says. “I need an

explanation from you!”

“Well,” the woman says, not looking up from her garden. “This morning I got a phone call from my

husband. I thought he was on a business trip in Florida, but it seems he has run off to Hawaii with

his secretary and doesn’t intend to come back.”

“What on earth does that have to do with selling our son a Porsche for $20?” The boy’s mom asks,

utterly perplexed.

The new neighbour smiles very big and pauses for a minute. “Well, my husband asked me to sell his

new Porsche and send him the money.

So I did...

ROSS’S CARTOON

3

Maggies Morsels

Curried Sweet Potatoes and Peas Patties

Ingredients:

500gr sweet potatoes peeled and chopped

250gr long grain rice

1 Tblsp Oil

1 onion finely chopped

1 clove garlic crushed

1 cup frozen peas thawed

2 Tblsp Mango chutney

1 egg lightly beaten

Salt and pepper

Method:

1. Cook Rice

2. In a pan, heat oil on medium heat and add onion and garlic till soft

Add curry power and cook until fragrant. Remove from heat and cool.

3. Cook and mash sweet potato and rice and onion mix (2) mix in peas,

chutney salt and pepper and egg and add together

4. Make patties and refrigerate for 30 minutes

5. Fry patties in oil and butter and serve with minted yoghurt and lemon

wedge.

6. These can be frozen for 2 months uncooked and thaw in fridge

overnight.

URGENT: There is a potential scam going around. People are getting phone calls from the ‘government’ and are being asked to Press 1 if they live alone, Press 2 if they need help and so on. Hang up.

This Photo by Unknown Author is

4

BRAIN TRAINING

(Solutions in the back of the mag)

Comedy catchphrase quiz – Which UK TV comedy shows made the following catchphrases famous?

1. “I don’t believe it!”

2. “I have a cunning plan…”

3. “Yeah but no but yeah but…”

4. “Good moaning”

5. “Oooh! Betty!”

6. “Thank you very much, Jerry!”

7. “Smeghead”

8. “No… no… no… no… yes!”

9. “Go on, go on, go on…”

10. “Lovely Jubbly”

5

THEATRE BOOKINGS FOR 2020

Tickets have been reserved for the following shows. If any show is cancelled or rescheduled because of the coronavirus pandemic, I will indicate on this page - ‘THEATRE BOOKINGS FOR 2020’ - which will be printed in the newsletter. Please check this page carefully each month.

MANDURAH PERFORMING ARTS THEATRE Sunday 16 August Herman’s Hermits

6.00pm Herman’s Hermits and The Searchers were two of the biggest music groups worldwide and they tour together in 2020 for the first time.

Pay by: 1 July 2020 Cost: $65.00

Saturday 23 October The Spirit of the Dance (Irish Dance)

7.30pm This is the rescheduled date for this show. For those who had

tickets for the May performance, please RETAIN YOUR TICKETS as

you have been allocated the same seat for the October

performance.

Friday 13 November John Williamson

8.00pm 2020 see's Australian icon John Williamson celebrate his 75th

birthday, his 50th Anniversary in the entertainment industry

and a final big year on the road!

Pay by: 29 September 2020 Cost: $59.50

CROWN THEATRE COMPLEX

Wednesday 15 July Westside Story – The Musical

1.00pm Hailed as the greatest Broadway musical of all time, the genius of West Side Story’s creators is unquestioned. The remarkable collaboration between Leonard Bernstein, Arthur Laurents, Stephen Sondheim and Jerome Robbins has produced a timeless masterpiece. This iconic dance musical remains one of the most poignant stage works of the twentieth century.

Pay by: 5 May 2020 Cost: $86.00 (bus/lunch/theatre)

THIS SHOW HAS BEEN CANCELLED.

6

This year’s Soup Lunch (fundraiser for Cancer Research), scheduled to be held in the Main Hall on Sunday 7 June 2020, has now been cancelled because of the coronavirus pandemic. We do hope that you will be able to support us when the Soup Lunch is rescheduled to a later date.

Brenda Moulton

SPECIAL REQUEST

As you all know, we bundle newspapers as a fundraiser for Cancer Research. However, we have been advised not to bundle newspapers during the current coronavirus epidemic.

Our SPECIAL REQUEST to you is please don’t throw your newspapers in the bin but, if at all possible, could you store them at home until such time as things return to normal?

When everything is back to normal and you find that your pile of newspapers is too large for you to get them to the Clubhouse, please let us know and we will willingly collect them.

When you have read your newspaper:

DON’T THROW JUST STOW!!

Most sincere thanks and keep safe. Brenda Moulton

7

AN American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. He took

a trip to Orlando to write about American churches then went south to north. When

taking photos, he noticed a golden telephone and asked the priest what it was for. The

priest said it was direct line to heaven to talk

to God and cost $10,000 a call. He travelled

to many continents and found they all had

golden telephones to heaven at $10,000 a

call. Finally, he decided to come to Australia

to see what they had yes same golden

telephone but at 40 cents a call. He asked

why it was so cheap to call heaven.

The priest smiled and replied ‘you are in

AUSTRALIA now it’s a local call

Ain’t it great being an AUSSIE

(Submitted by Bob W)

*****

WHO STOLE THE SUN?

A resident wants to share this very

clever photo sequence with readers,

which demonstrates what can be done

with a little photo imagination.

Are our Village photographers up to the

challenge of providing similar snaps?

8

What is “Be Connected” You May Ask?

It is a website with online learning resources where you can develop your digital skills and it will give you the

confidence to master the internet and the everyday technology that is available to us in this digital world that

we all live in.

As we are all in that forced time of isolation because of COVID 19, it is the perfect time to be learning new

skills that you will find engaging and reap the rewards, especially if you have always been reluctant to take

on the challenge of learning new internet skills before.

Be Connected – Will show you how:

• To use and customise your desktop computer, iPad/Tablet, iPhone/Android phone

• To easily understand and develop the skills to utilise the internet confidently

• You will be able to see and talk to your family and friends by way of FaceTime, WhatsApp, Facebook and others

• You can connect with family and friends anywhere in the world

• To keep up-to-date with what’s happening in your community

• You can use the internet in so many different ways that you will wonder what all the fuss was about.

Fore example, double-click on the “Start Learning” box on the Home Page. Scroll down to “connecting to

others”. Double-click on “Explore”. This page shows you how to setup a video call to family and friends using

Skype, WhatsApp and Facetime. They all operate similarly, but I prefer Facetime as it uses your contacts list

from your phone. Follow the instructions (E.G. “How to Facetime”) and Hey Presto, you are now face-to-face

with your caller and love ones. HAVE FUN.

Be Connected, is a website for older Australians, yes you and I; and its aim is to encourage us all to use the

internet and the technology that is available to us, to thrive in this modern world we live in. So, it’s time for

you to BE CONNECTED and take on a new challenge, so by the time this dreaded coronavirus is over, you will

all be savvy internet users and be able to use those phones and iPads/Tablets, almost like your family and

grandkids do.

To start this new journey of yours, just type be connected into your internet browser and then click on one of

the Be Connected links; and you will then see all that is available for you. Enjoy the experience.

TIME to take up the challenge and BE CONNECTED

*****

9

How are you occupying your time during this lockdown? No doubt many of you are catching up on all those chores that you were going to do tomorrow and by

now all our homes have been spring-cleaned out, cupboards sorted and our cars are looking

immaculate. It has also been noticeable how many residents are exercising regularly by walking around

the village. Well done to you all. But how do we fill in those in-between times?

Here are some suggestions and recommendations for you.

Netflix Movies Darkest Hour – Winston Churchill at his best and a great history lesson as well.

The Mule – Arguably Clint Eastwood’s best movie in years. Love the soundtrack of “Don’t Let the

Old Man In”.

Woman in Gold – A feel-good true story movie with Helen Mirren and Ryan Reynolds

Spotlight – A riveting true story of the Pulitzer prize-winning Boston Globe’s investigation that would

rock the city and cause a crisis in one of the world’s oldest and most trusted institutions.

Collateral Beauty – A feel-good movie starring Will Smith and Helen Mirren.

The Big Short – It’s the ultimate feel-furious movie about Wall Street and the financial crisis in 2008.

The Post – An absorbing Spielberg true story with Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep

Binge Watching serials

When you see us – Netflix. A true story that shows the horrors of injustice

The English Game – Netflix. London Spy – Netflix, Blood – SBS on Demand, Bodyguard – Netflix,

The Spy – Netflix, Line of Duty – ABC iView, The Angel – Netflix

Note: Most of these streaming services like Netflix, Stan, Amazon etc. are currently offering a 30-day

free trial, so try it and see if it’s for you.

Books/Novels

We also want to hear about those “can’t put down” novels, or other books you have been reading,

especially if there are any “must reads”.

We are all in this lockdown together, so please share your suggestion with other residents.

What we have provided above is just a starter and it’s now up to you to share what you have been

watching and reading and especially the ones that you would recommend.

So, please send a note to Kerry and she will include your suggestions in the next Village Voice. Send

to Kerry by Text: 0438 925 366 or Email: kewietoo@bigpond.com

10

AS TIME GOES BY NO 2 (Bob Watson)

Dad purchased the farm from my other brothers and we moved out to farm. It was 5 kms from town so Dad got the power [220 volt] line out and it was good to have lights not candle or lamps. Sometimes in heavy winds a falling branch broke a wire so we stood on truck and dad had one end of wire and I took the other and we touched them together then dad made a loop. I pulled both ends together and wound them up, sometimes the wire parted and I got full shock wowee and let go to start again 220 DC voltage is safe but 240 AC voltage you can’t let go. We went to a clearing sale 30 kms away and noticed a dust storm that seemed to be in our area and when got home we had left kitchen window open and everything was covered in red dust breakfast dishes on table/floor and drifted into bedroom and small bit in lounge wow what a mess had to clean it all up before mum got home from Perth. When ploughing or seeding, we liked to drive straight [all gps now] one time we had to cut paddock in half so you head for a point a distance away went straight ½ way then started to curve haha dad had his sight on a cow feeding that moved. Working one night we had 2 Fordson tractors with strong lights and as we came up a slight rise the lights shone on neighbours shed 1 km away they told us they were loading seed and super and worked when our lights shone on shed then waited till we came around again to load more. Dad decided to build a new house, so we had to make bricks we had good sand on part of the farm so shovelled it on and off truck got a good cement mixer. You put brick mould on wood plate fill and press then removed mould to another wood plate as dad took that away I filled 2nd mould till all mix was gone. If mix was too wet bricks sagged too dry went powdery so had to have right amount water. They were in a fenced area to stop cat/dog chooks we stacked that batch and made more each day in time we made 10,000 bricks. We got an old retired brick layer and started to build house then dad decided to put a tip body on the truck and a front end loader on the tractor, I wish he had done that before doing bricks as would of saved a lot of shovelling. The 1946 Inter KB 6 truck still takes grain to bins and only missed 1 year with dry year for 63 years and used on farm to cart water /feed to stock when needed. The new house was closer to town and better road we then had to build a shed and fences as old ones were falling down. To be continued – Bob Watson

Sheryl advised that she is available

to cut your hair in your home.

.

Contact Sheryl on 0402 408 727

11

HOW LONG COVID-19 SURVIVES ON THESE SURFACES:

• When the virus is attached to airborne droplets like moisture from coughs and sneezes,

fog, dust or medical gases, it can survive up to three hours.

• On copper surfaces like draw handles, virus can last up to four hours.

• On cardboard boxes and mail, the virus lives for up to 24 hours.

• On plastic and stainless steel, the virus last the longest – between two and three days.

Non-porous surfaces like metal doorknobs, plastic or metal buttons, handrails, light

switches, keyboards and desks seem to let the virus survive the longest, the study found.

• On glass, a separate report found that COVID-19 can live as long as nine days

*****

BELOW ARE SOME OF OUR RESIDENTS GETTING DRESSED UP TO GO OUT

(2 X BIN DAYS)

Passion Pages-Oliver Bombshell Boston

Bogon Boston Floe Lowe

12

Boobyella Boston Drunken Bunny with Scotch (Egg)

007 Boston

Grizzly Adams

Angelina Adams

13

THIS IS HOW SOME OF US TRIED TO SPEND TIME WITH FRIENDS BUT STILL TAKING

IN MIND RESPONSIBLE SOCIAL DISTANCING

(before the stricter rules were into place)

LONG TABLE DINNER AT WILCOCK

WAY

SUNDOWNER IN GALLOP WAY

*****

Happy Birthday Val Watson

Bob played Happy birthday on his keyboard and was

cooking crayfish for her birthday dinner. What a hubby!

14

Another great thing to do of course is walk - Phil Adams and Ron Lowe walked around

finding parks.

You may recognise these:

*****

The April 2020 Newsletter is now available on the WARVRA website.

Highlights include:

• Presidents Report.

• WARVRA May meeting CANCELLED.

• Backing up your computer.

• Legislation & Advocacy Report.

• Treasurers Report.

• Arthritis & Osteoporosis WA.

• MyPost Concessions.

• Budget Processing in Virus Days.

Please note that the most recent newsletter can now be

read on-line. There is a dedicated page for this - found on

the 'Home' menu "Read the Latest Newsletter online"This

makes it easier to access, as it is not necessary to

download the file - but of course that is still possible if you

need a local copy.

15

EATING IN THE UK IN THE FIFTIES

Curry was a surname.

Olive oil was used to soften ear wax and never went anywhere near food.

Spices came from the Middle East where they were used for embalming.

Herbs were used to make rather dodgy medicine.

A takeaway was a mathematical problem.

A pizza was something to do with a leaning tower.

Bananas and oranges only appeared at Christmas

time.

The only vegetables known to us were

spuds,peas,carrots and cabbage.

All crisps were plain; the only choice we had was

whether to put the salt on or not.

Condiments consisted of salt, pepper, vinegar and

brown sauce if we were lucky.

Soft drinks were called pop.

Coke was something that we put on the fire.

A Chinese chippy was a foreign carpenter.

Rice was a milk pudding, and never, ever part of our

dinner.

A Big Mac was what we wore when it was raining.

A Pizza Hut was an Italian shed.

A microwave was something out of a science fiction movie.

Brown bread was something only poor people

ate.

Oil was for lubricating, fat was for cooking.

Bread and jam was a treat.

Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves and

never green.

Coffee was Camp, and came in a bottle.

Cubed sugar was regarded as posh.

Figs and dates appeared every Christmas, but

no one ever ate them.

Coconuts only appeared when the fair came to

town.

Jellied eels were peculiar to Londoners.

Salad cream was a dressing for salads,

mayonnaise did not exist.

Hors d'oeuvre was a spelling mistake.

The starter was our main meal.

Soup was a main meal.

Only Heinz made beans.

Leftovers went to the dog.

16

A POEM (from Facebook)

I'm normally a social girl

I love to meet my mates

But lately with the virus here

We can't go out the gates.

You see, we are the 'oldies' now

We need to stay inside

If they haven't seen us for a while

They'll think we've upped and died.

They'll never know the things we did

Before we got this old

There wasn't any Facebook

So not everything was told.

We may seem sweet old ladies

Who would never be uncouth

But we grew up in the 50s -

If you only knew the truth!

There was sex and drugs and rock 'n

roll

The pill and miniskirts

We smoked, we drank, we partied

And were quite outrageous flirts.

Then we settled down, got married

And turned into someone's mum,

Somebody's wife, then nana,

Who on earth did we become?

We didn't mind the change of pace

Because our lives were full

But to bury us before we're dead

Is like red rag to a bull!

So here you find me stuck inside

For 4 weeks, maybe more

I finally found myself again

Then I had to close the door!

It didn’t really bother me

I'd while away the hour

I'd bake for all the family

But I've got no bloody flour!

Now Netflix is just wonderful

I like a gutsy thriller

I'm swooning over Idris

Or some random sexy killer.

At least I've got a stash of booze

For when I'm being idle

There's wine and whiskey, even gin

If I'm feeling suicidal!

So let's all drink to lockdown

To recovery and health

And hope this bloody virus

Doesn't decimate our wealth.

We'll all get through the crisis

And be back to join our mates

Just hoping I'm not far too wide

To fit through the flaming gates!

17

Random Facts -The element Cobalt gets its name from a trickster goblin of German folklore, the

kobold, because when medieval miners discovered it and tried to smelt it thinking it was

silver, it released toxic gasses they believed to be the goblin playing a trick on them.

-A study found that wearing a tie can reduce blood flow to the brain. Men wearing ties

& men without ties were scanned using MRI to measure the blood flow to the head;

brains of tie-wearers on average received 7.5% less cerebral blood flow than brains of

those with no ties.

-The Memphis Peabody Marching Ducks - every day at 11am they saunter down a red

carpet to the hotel's water fountain, hang out for 6 hours then saunter back up to the

rooftop. They've been doing this since 1940.

-A Sloth Can Hold Its Breath for 40 Minutes Underwater, longer than a Dolphin.

-The Bolton Strid is a narrow section of river in Yorkshire, England that appears shallow

and calm, but is actually a deep, powerful river flowing vertically. Local legend claims

none who have entered its waters have survived.

-Mel Brooks was a producer on the movie The Elephant Man, but his name was

intentionally uncredited as to not lead audiences to believe the film was a comedy.

-The best-selling book in Japan is 1985 was the strategy guide for Super Mario

Brothers.

-Rodney Dangerfield wrote a romance novel called La Contessa, that features his own

face on the cover, and that he narrates himself.

-The expression 'Paint the town red' has actual historical origins. In 1837, the Marquis

of Waterford led a group of friends on a night of drinking through the English town of

Melton Mowbray. The mob literally painted a tollgate, the doors of several homes a swan

statue with red paint.

-A bumblebee will stick up a middle leg if it’s annoyed by your presence, which means

“back off!”. Otherwise they are docile to the point that you could usually handle one

without negative consequence.

-18 fictional characters have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, including Mickey

Mouse, Snoopy, Godzilla and Shrek.

18

EARLY MORNING WALKERS by Brenda

The alarm goes off and we’re up and about

We quickly dress and make our way out

To the morning air we quickly succumb

As early morning walkers we’ve become

The sky is blue; the birds sing their song

Their voices follow us as we stroll along

The streets have few people out in the sun

As early morning walkers we’ve become

The silence is deafening without any crowds

With only our shadows seen on the ground.

Some dogs dash around whilst out in the sun

As early morning walkers we’ve become

The beautiful colours of red, pink and green

And yellows and oranges fit for a queen

The golds and the lilacs glow in the sun

As early morning walkers we’ve become

There are geraniums, marigolds and lavender too

Roses, vinca and bushes - such a wonderful hue

The gardens sparkle out in the sun

As early morning walkers we’ve become

Just check the gardens that are around

The beauty contained we’re sure will astound

We’ve noticed it ourselves whilst out in the sun

As early morning walkers we’ve become

Now what if it rains and we can’t walk outside

And we stay in our house and view from inside

The gardens will love it, they flourish with rain

We’ll just wait ‘til we’re morning walkers again!

Brenda Moulton

19

100th Anniversary (2017)

Submitted by Alan Drakeford

Almost three years ago in 2017 the Rail Heritage Society and others celebrated the

100th Anniversary of the completion of the Trans Australian Railway known as the

“Linking of the Rails.”

The date of that event was 17th October 1917 which happened to be during the First

World War.

Some years previously, I had discovered a cartoon sketch of German origin

humourizing this event. I believe this was “Taking a shot at the enemy”.

.

20

Brain Training Solutions

Comedy catchphrase quiz ANSWERS

1. One Foot in the Grave

2. Blackadder

3. Little Britain

4. ‘Allo ‘Allo!

5. Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em

6. The Good Life

7. Red Dwarf

8. The Vicar of Dibley

9. Father Ted

10. Only Fools and Horses