MASH S08E05 Good-Bye, Radar (Part 2)

8/10/2019 MASH S08E05 Good-Bye, Radar (Part 2)

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100:00:00,105 --> 00:00:01,005Shared by Lilith78

200:00:53,542 --> 00:00:56,502- Ok, let's take a look in there.Give me the rib spreader.- Rib spreader.

300:00:57,293 --> 00:00:59,903- [All Exclaiming]- What is it? Again? Come on with the lights!

400:01:00,402 --> 00:01:02,713- [Potter] Get some lanterns in here!- Ow! Margaret!!!

500:01:02,713 --> 00:01:05,072You've caught my finger

in the spreader!

600:01:05,085 --> 00:01:05,893- Geez!

700:01:05,923 --> 00:01:07,972Great! Terrific! Just dandy!

800:01:08,112 --> 00:01:11,153Hey, Bonzo,

the auxiliary generator is missing!

900:01:11,273 --> 00:01:13,194Got a distended abdomen here.I need some gastric suction.

1000:01:13,465 --> 00:01:17,605We'll whomp up a good old-fashioned,hand-operated Wangensteen suction.

11

00:01:17,655 --> 00:01:18,685Welcome back, son!

1200:01:18,938 --> 00:01:21,585I think I missed you even morethan I miss Mildred.

1300:01:22,835 --> 00:01:26,385


2/31

- Either of you seen Radar?- Last I saw him, he was in the Officers Club...

1400:01:26,395 --> 00:01:28,045having a touch of the grape.

1500:01:28,935 --> 00:01:31,475- Why? What's wrong?- Plenty.

1600:01:32,336 --> 00:01:35,085I just got a wirefrom the boy's mother in Iowa.

1700:01:36,455 --> 00:01:38,375Radar's Uncle Ed passed away.

1800:01:38,686 --> 00:01:40,045I'm goin' home, sir?

1900:01:40,165 --> 00:01:43,787Radar, Lord knows your motheris a strong woman, but she won't make it alone.

2000:01:43,895 --> 00:01:45,315You oughta be there with her.

2100:01:46,455 --> 00:01:47,955Radar, I'm very happy for ya.

2200:01:48,745 --> 00:01:49,705Yeah.

2300:01:51,365 --> 00:01:52,775I'm happy for me too.

2400:01:56,295 --> 00:01:57,225I guess.

2500:01:59,923 --> 00:02:00,893Gee.

2600:02:02,203 --> 00:02:04,663- I thought I lost this.- What is it?

27


3/31

00:02:06,003 --> 00:02:09,393It's my very own, personal,personal-type thermometer.

2800:02:10,115 --> 00:02:11,933- Colonel Blake gave it to me, just before--- Aw, Radar.

2900:02:12,344 --> 00:02:15,343You got the rest of your lifeto look at stuff like that.

3000:02:15,443 --> 00:02:17,203I'm in trouble here, now!

3100:02:18,173 --> 00:02:19,153Hey, look.

3200:02:20,327 --> 00:02:21,513

It's my Purple Heart.

3300:02:23,494 --> 00:02:25,524Hawkeye pinned thison me himself.

3400:02:26,614 --> 00:02:29,454He even saluted me.Hawkeye's never saluted anybody.

35

00:02:30,244 --> 00:02:31,794I think I'm alreadyon my own.

3600:02:36,194 --> 00:02:37,454My Uncle Ed.

3700:02:39,074 --> 00:02:42,354[Clicks Tongue]Gee, I got so busy, I forgot...

3800:02:42,694 --> 00:02:44,134how muchI'm gonna miss him.

3900:02:45,054 --> 00:02:47,484Look, kid, I knowit's tough on ya.


4/31

4000:02:47,484 --> 00:02:49,474Believe me, I feel as bad as you do.

4100:02:49,564 --> 00:02:51,954But you just can't throw me to the wolves.

4200:02:52,244 --> 00:02:55,312Klinger, look! You've got tolearn to do this stuff yourself!

4300:02:55,314 --> 00:02:57,324Nobody helped mewhen I took this job.

4400:02:57,394 --> 00:03:00,124Yeah, but you're a born clerk.I'm a born civilian.

45

00:03:00,177 --> 00:03:03,164I hate offices.I'm lousy with numbers and letters.

4600:03:03,336 --> 00:03:05,096I get paper cutsand I lose things.

4700:03:05,118 --> 00:03:07,806When I was a kid, my motherpinned my bike to my sleeve.

4800:03:07,907 --> 00:03:11,286Listen! I'm not the clerk anymore.You're the clerk.

4900:03:11,336 --> 00:03:13,000And this isa very important job!

5000:03:13,096 --> 00:03:15,396

Everybody dependson ya for everything.

5100:03:15,556 --> 00:03:18,356Don't you understand that?They depend on you for the mail...

5200:03:18,626 --> 00:03:20,666


5/31

the supplies--even the generators.

5300:03:21,586 --> 00:03:25,346Now, look. You better pull yourself together,or this place is gonna be one heck of a mess.

5400:03:25,376 --> 00:03:28,329Well, my compliments to youand Dr. Wangensteen, Colonel. This...

5500:03:28,329 --> 00:03:30,856refuse collection of yoursis apparently very effective.

5600:03:30,886 --> 00:03:34,756Well, it'll do the trick for now, but I'llbe glad when we get back to the real thing.

57

00:03:34,766 --> 00:03:36,878Colonel, I'm impressed.What next?

5800:03:36,966 --> 00:03:38,806Hamster powerfor the X-ray machine?

5900:03:38,846 --> 00:03:42,106I haven't seen one of these thingssince nursing school. It's working fine.

6000:03:42,177 --> 00:03:44,478Just don't forget to flipthose jugs, Hunnicutt.

6100:03:44,939 --> 00:03:47,328You know, I'm gonna missRadar something terrible.

6200:03:47,558 --> 00:03:49,078

There's a lot of thatgoin' around.

6300:03:49,328 --> 00:03:51,979Come on, I'll buy you a cupof genuine Mess Tent coffee.

6400:03:52,039 --> 00:03:54,908


6/31

Good idea. That brew willstiffen anybody's upper lip.

6500:03:55,398 --> 00:03:58,389You know, I feel a little strangeabout Radar's leaving too.

6600:03:58,979 --> 00:04:01,249Funny, in all his time here,I've never given him a second thought.

6700:04:01,559 --> 00:04:03,879Granted, his departure willcreate something of a vacuum...

6800:04:04,149 --> 00:04:06,600but then again-- [Chuckles]so did his presence.

69

00:04:06,608 --> 00:04:09,719He reminds me of an oldRaggedy Ann doll I had as a kid.

7000:04:09,729 --> 00:04:12,829I'd kick it, pull out its eyes,yell at it, ignore it...

7100:04:12,869 --> 00:04:15,688- and then when I lost it I'd cry for days.- I know exactly how you felt.

7200:04:15,689 --> 00:04:17,609I once had the same experiencewith a butler.

7300:04:18,399 --> 00:04:21,369Boy, that guy really gets on my nerves.

7400:04:27,099 --> 00:04:29,249- Wow! Hot Lips!

- [Chuckling]

7500:04:30,899 --> 00:04:34,424Well, O'Reilly, you must bebrimming with anticipation.

7600:04:34,439 --> 00:04:37,599Back to your native "Io-way"


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and your American Dream--

7700:04:38,174 --> 00:04:40,259haystacks, chawin' tobacco...

7800:04:40,459 --> 00:04:43,489sitting around the silos shootingthe breeze with your bovines--

7900:04:43,579 --> 00:04:46,799- Land o' Goshen, that's the life.- Yeah.

8000:04:47,426 --> 00:04:50,509I haven't thought of nothin' elseever since Colonel Potter gave me the word.

8100:04:51,649 --> 00:04:53,369Not a very good way

to be going back home...

8200:04:53,369 --> 00:04:56,559- but at least I'll be there.- And we'll be here, with no electricity.

8300:04:56,599 --> 00:04:58,439You haven't giventhat much thought, have you?

84

00:04:58,589 --> 00:05:01,123That's not true, sir.Me and Klinger are workin' on it.

8500:05:01,379 --> 00:05:02,823Mostly me.

8500:05:03,879 --> 00:05:06,223I don't mean to bea tattletale or nothin', but Klinger stinks.

8600:05:06,249 --> 00:05:08,249[Chuckles]Indeed.

8700:05:08,389 --> 00:05:12,029With that dolt in charge of acquiringa generator, we'll be powerless forever.


8/31

8800:05:12,039 --> 00:05:16,519Perhaps, when you get back to "Io-way,"you'd think to send us some batteries.

8900:05:16,734 --> 00:05:18,619Huh? Oh, sure.

9000:05:18,679 --> 00:05:20,539I wouldn't let you down, sir.You'll see.

9100:05:20,699 --> 00:05:24,128O'Reilly, your loyalty to this unitis truly commendable.

9200:05:24,629 --> 00:05:28,060Well, sure, sir.That's because you guys are all swell.

9300:05:28,499 --> 00:05:32,799You know, when you all get back home, you'reall invited to Ottumwa for a big party.

9400:05:32,800 --> 00:05:37,840I will be counting the hours until I hearthe old dinner bell... a-clangin'.

9500:05:38,220 --> 00:05:39,920

[Klinger]Hey, Radar!

9600:05:40,099 --> 00:05:43,019There's a guy named Alvin on the phone.About the generator!

9700:05:43,020 --> 00:05:46,000Well, talk to him. You'rethe company clerk now. Come on!

9800:05:46,091 --> 00:05:49,179Well, okay, Mr. O'Reilly.

9900:05:49,180 --> 00:05:52,160But on your way home, I hope you haveto sit next to a sweaty fat guy...

100


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00:05:52,160 --> 00:05:53,880who brought his own salami.

10100:05:56,760 --> 00:06:00,011- See the kind of coping I gotta put up with?- [B.J.] Hey, Radar!

10200:06:00,130 --> 00:06:01,570- Huh?- Can you give me a hand here?

10300:06:01,940 --> 00:06:03,050Yes, sir.

10400:06:05,560 --> 00:06:07,510- Oh, gee, your "hoosenwagon" broke down.- No problem.

10500:06:07,510 --> 00:06:09,701

I happen to be a certified"hoosenwagon" repairman.

10600:06:10,122 --> 00:06:12,330-Just keep that above the level of that jar.- Yeah, I know.

10700:06:12,970 --> 00:06:14,520Uh, sir. If you don't mind my sayin' so...

108

00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:17,030that whatchamacallit lookspretty breakdownable.

10900:06:17,080 --> 00:06:19,490They don't make these Wangensteensthe way they used to.

11000:06:20,260 --> 00:06:22,052I think that's got it.

11100:06:22,890 --> 00:06:25,780If we don't get some power around heresoon, it's gonna be lights out for everything.

11200:06:28,121 --> 00:06:31,050Yeah. Uh, sir, as long asyour whatchamadoodle is working...


10/31

11300:06:31,050 --> 00:06:33,672- I think I'd better take a call.- Sure.

11400:06:33,672 --> 00:06:35,372Hey, Klinger. Don't hang up!

11500:06:35,512 --> 00:06:39,122Alvin, all I wantis a lousy backup generator.

11600:06:40,772 --> 00:06:42,808Aw, come on!I've already offered you everything...

11700:06:42,908 --> 00:06:44,832plus a couple of things I don't got!

118

00:06:45,093 --> 00:06:46,706That's it. There's no more.

11900:06:49,342 --> 00:06:53,253You're crazy! Where in Korea am Igonna get a frozen custard machine?

12000:06:53,306 --> 00:06:55,732- What's a frozen custard machine?- What's a frozen custard machine?

12100:06:55,733 --> 00:06:57,600Hey, listen.We need that generator.

12200:06:57,603 --> 00:06:59,762It gets pretty dark aroundhere at night, you know.

12300:07:00,613 --> 00:07:01,892[Helicopter Whirring]

12400:07:03,032 --> 00:07:05,372- Uh-oh.- Oh, no.

12500:07:06,072 --> 00:07:10,212Alvin! Forget the generator. Just send meall the jeeps and trucks you got.


11/31

12600:07:10,383 --> 00:07:13,113Yes, that's right! You heard me.Send them now. We got wounded.

12700:07:13,556 --> 00:07:15,393Come on, Klinger.It's gonna get dark P.D.Q.

12800:07:15,543 --> 00:07:19,403- [Trucks Revving]- [Radar] Okay. Hold it right there. That's it.

12900:07:19,613 --> 00:07:22,664Get your lightson the patients, fellas!

13000:07:22,673 --> 00:07:27,022Jack! Jack, will you get the lead out?

This isn't a Sunday social, you know.

13100:07:27,023 --> 00:07:29,933Come on! Let's geta little light in here. Come on.

13200:07:30,643 --> 00:07:33,206All right, hold it. Hold it right there.Is that better, sir?

133

00:07:33,313 --> 00:07:38,213Perfecto. Radar, if they gave theCongressional Medal of Honor for smarts...

13400:07:38,213 --> 00:07:41,803- by gum, you'd have one.- Thank you, sir. I'm just doin' my former job.

13500:07:41,803 --> 00:07:44,456Stroke of genius.I can actually see where I'm cutting.

13600:07:45,183 --> 00:07:48,623Well, lookee here.There's your medal.

13700:07:49,117 --> 00:07:51,335You just might have saved this boy's life.


12/31

13800:07:51,505 --> 00:07:54,785Looks fine. Let's start sewing.Catgut. Radar...

13900:07:54,826 --> 00:07:58,775if you're not a certifiable,fur-lined, 24-carat hero...

14000:07:58,835 --> 00:08:01,845I'll kiss your tootsiesat the commandant's picnic.

14100:08:02,285 --> 00:08:04,815Keep it up, folks.Thanks to Corporal O'Reilly...

14200:08:04,815 --> 00:08:07,685- we're gonna make it through this night.- [Cheering]

14300:08:07,725 --> 00:08:10,225[Hawkeye] I hope so, 'cause the Auto Clubcan't keep coming over here...

14400:08:10,225 --> 00:08:11,645to jump-start our operating room.

14500:08:11,975 --> 00:08:13,685What a curious turn in my medical career...

14600:08:13,685 --> 00:08:18,015from the operating theater at Boston Generalto the drive-in theater at Ouijongbu.

14700:08:18,045 --> 00:08:19,535Clamp! Ow!

14800:08:20,995 --> 00:08:23,677Who goes to bed and dreams up

this horror every night?

14900:08:24,077 --> 00:08:27,257Somebody ought to tell him to lay offthe anchovy pizzas before sack time.

15000:08:27,717 --> 00:08:30,787This is some place, our little hospital


13/31

on the banks of the River Styx.

15100:08:31,327 --> 00:08:33,999Easy to find. Just follow Calamity Laneto the giant parking lot.

15200:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,927"Wounds healed while you wait."Am I ranting? I hope so.

15300:08:36,927 --> 00:08:40,013- You know, my ranting gets raves.- I brought sponges for sponging.

15400:08:40,013 --> 00:08:42,958And now, from the "wish I werein his shoes" department...

15500:08:43,217 --> 00:08:47,038

Corporal Radar "I can seethe old homestead from here" O'Reilly.

15600:08:47,618 --> 00:08:49,348Tell me how it feels.Are you excited?

15700:08:49,488 --> 00:08:52,718Have you packed your things twice already?Gonna get a window seat on the plane?

15800:08:52,718 --> 00:08:56,338All of me is green with envy. Especiallymy finger, which is gangrene.

15900:08:57,508 --> 00:09:00,398- You've got it.- [Sighs Deeply] God, my finger hurts.

16000:09:02,988 --> 00:09:07,458I thought I'd seen it all.

I've cut in caves, huts and trenches.

16100:09:08,238 --> 00:09:11,829I've sewn enough intestine to stretchfrom here to the Mayo Clinic.

16200:09:13,488 --> 00:09:15,948But never in all my years


14/31

have I had a session like that.

16300:09:16,388 --> 00:09:18,948And without your brainstorm,we'd never have made it.

16400:09:19,048 --> 00:09:20,788Just comes with experience, sir.

16500:09:20,898 --> 00:09:23,078I don't even know how longwe were out there.

16600:09:23,328 --> 00:09:27,678- Ten hours and 24 minutes.- I guess you've filled out the report.

16700:09:27,966 --> 00:09:29,908It's on your desk, already signed by you.

16800:09:30,148 --> 00:09:33,698Listen, son. After the campgets 40 or 50 winks...

16900:09:34,188 --> 00:09:38,279we'll all be gathering in the Mess Tentfor your shove-off soiree.

17000:09:38,740 --> 00:09:41,498

Uh, that's not necessarily necessary, sir.

17100:09:41,518 --> 00:09:44,373It damn well is. You deserve it.

17200:09:44,478 --> 00:09:48,428No. I mean, on account ofI've decided to stay.

17300:09:48,958 --> 00:09:50,078

What?

17400:09:51,223 --> 00:09:52,998You been nippin' at this hooch?

17500:09:52,998 --> 00:09:56,748Colonel, if I left now, you'd be


15/31

up a tree without a paddle.

17600:09:56,868 --> 00:10:00,298Been there many times before, son.Don't let that stop ya.

17700:10:00,298 --> 00:10:03,548Colonel, I can fix it so my momcan manage without me.

17800:10:03,698 --> 00:10:07,698But the 4077 is different. You sawwhat just happened out there.

17900:10:08,208 --> 00:10:10,498A lot of lives depend on medoin' my job

18000:10:10,499 --> 00:10:12,720

and I'm the only one around herewho can.

18100:10:12,728 --> 00:10:17,258Radar, I appreciate your... loyalty...

18200:10:17,378 --> 00:10:19,249but you're making a big mistake.

18300:10:19,268 --> 00:10:23,169

You've done your duty.Now, I don't care how bad things get...

18400:10:23,189 --> 00:10:26,899I want your keister on that planethe day after tomorrow.

18500:10:27,099 --> 00:10:31,159Sir, with all due respect to your"colonel-ness," you can't order me to go.

18600:10:32,589 --> 00:10:35,259Boy, you're not usin' your head.Think it over.

18700:10:36,749 --> 00:10:39,679I have. My place is here.

188


16/31

00:10:44,029 --> 00:10:45,739- There you are.- Oh, hi, Hawkeye.

18900:10:45,849 --> 00:10:48,518Don't "Hi, Hawkeye" me.Go home, you little airhead!

19000:10:48,519 --> 00:10:51,889- I'm sorry. I'm not gonna do that.- Why? You're Corporal Mahatma Gandhi?

19100:10:51,889 --> 00:10:55,599- You're gonna out-endure us?- That's my unpacking you're packing!

19200:10:55,639 --> 00:10:59,049We all wait for that day.We dream about it.

19300:10:59,049 --> 00:11:04,549We pray for it. We'd sacrifice a virgin to itif we could find one. How dare you!

19400:11:04,619 --> 00:11:06,623I'm sorry. There's too mucharound here I gotta do.

19500:11:06,623 --> 00:11:08,649No, no, no. You're not

pulling that tripe on me.

19600:11:08,923 --> 00:11:11,339They've been holding warslong before you signed up...

19700:11:11,339 --> 00:11:13,249and the fun'll continuelong after you leave.

198

00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:16,659Let me put this as gracefully as I can:We don't need you.

19900:11:16,799 --> 00:11:19,039Oh, you don't, huh?How's your generator?

200


17/31

00:11:19,473 --> 00:11:22,969Is Klinger gonna find you one? If things gottough, and you were the one that was leavin'...

20100:11:22,969 --> 00:11:24,773- you'd be stayin'.- Don't bet on it.

20200:11:24,773 --> 00:11:27,989I'd be out of here so fast, my shorts wouldhave to catch the next plane.

20300:11:28,773 --> 00:11:31,249- Get-- Ow!- Oh, yeah. Yeah.

20400:11:31,389 --> 00:11:33,769I saw you workin' in O.R.with your hurt finger.

20500:11:33,791 --> 00:11:37,361- You'd stay.- Don't go poking your nose into my finger.

20600:11:37,861 --> 00:11:41,152Hey, listen. I got responsibilitiesaround here just like you.

20700:11:41,231 --> 00:11:44,622You got responsibilities

at home, you jackass!

20800:11:44,622 --> 00:11:46,754Well, how about if I wantto make up my own mind?

20900:11:47,027 --> 00:11:49,653I'm no kid anymore, you know?I've been around.

210

00:11:49,694 --> 00:11:51,743Oh, excuse me, Mr. Globetrotter.

21100:11:51,963 --> 00:11:54,493- That's right. I'm grown up now.- Why, bless my soul.

21200:11:54,763 --> 00:11:57,614


18/31

Mrs. O'Reilly's little boyis a big man now.

21300:11:58,144 --> 00:12:00,323I guess you've outgrownall that other stuff, huh?

21400:12:00,324 --> 00:12:03,504Ottumwa, the farm--your mother--

21500:12:03,534 --> 00:12:05,554Oh! Your mother!

21600:12:05,834 --> 00:12:07,414Have you outgrownyour responsibility to her?

21700:12:07,704 --> 00:12:13,504

Listen-- how I take care of my mom ismy business. You said it yourself, Hawkeye.

21800:12:13,574 --> 00:12:16,364Nobody should tell somebody elsehow to run their life.

21900:12:20,277 --> 00:12:22,227First he's going, then he's staying.

220

00:12:23,127 --> 00:12:25,967Why is he staying?Because I'm an idiot.

22100:12:26,638 --> 00:12:30,357Why don't we make everybody happy?Let the hero stay, let the idiot go home.

22200:12:30,787 --> 00:12:32,027[Phone Ringing]

22300:12:38,257 --> 00:12:40,7884077th.What'd I do wrong now?

22400:12:41,757 --> 00:12:44,177O'Reilly? No, he's not here.

225


19/31

00:12:44,937 --> 00:12:48,057How do I know?Probably out posing for a statue.

22600:12:49,647 --> 00:12:51,258Yeah. What is it?

22700:12:52,927 --> 00:12:55,827"Hondo McKee." Cute name.

22800:12:56,941 --> 00:13:01,478"I" Corps Supply. You got a generator,and you wanna talk deal.

22900:13:03,078 --> 00:13:07,977Oh, yeah? Listen, Hondo. Pal.

23000:13:08,307 --> 00:13:10,167I can handle that for ya.

23100:13:10,341 --> 00:13:13,118There's your scotch.Where's my generator?

23200:13:13,118 --> 00:13:14,607Boy, you didn't wasteany time getting here.

23300:13:14,891 --> 00:13:17,227

After I picked up the scotch,speed was of the essence.

23400:13:17,508 --> 00:13:19,708- Oh, yeah? Where did you get it?- Don't ask.

23500:13:19,758 --> 00:13:22,378- It's the code of the desert.- The generator's at Dispatch.

23600:13:22,438 --> 00:13:25,018- Ah-ha.- Before you go, I'll just check out the scotch.

23700:13:25,028 --> 00:13:27,018- Oh, yes.- Oh. Ten-hut!


20/31

23800:13:27,898 --> 00:13:29,568- Are you McKee?- Yes, sir.

23900:13:31,040 --> 00:13:35,340I'm Major George Van Kirk.243rd Service and Supply.

24000:13:35,358 --> 00:13:37,858- I'm here for my generator.- [Mutters In Arabic]

24100:13:37,858 --> 00:13:42,208There's your requisition. I'm here in personto make sure that that baby gets to me.

24200:13:42,208 --> 00:13:45,858Somehow, a lot of the stuff that we orderthrough this place gets lost.

24300:13:46,298 --> 00:13:49,458Sir, I-I'm surprised. I don't know howthat could be happening.

24400:13:49,458 --> 00:13:52,238Your generator's here. I have personallybeen holding it for you.

24500:13:52,491 --> 00:13:56,728

I hope so, because we're down tousing a puny backup generator.

24600:13:56,728 --> 00:13:58,458And we had to swipe that from a MASH!

24700:13:58,888 --> 00:14:00,048[McKee]Uh, if you just come to my office, sir...

248

00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:03,328we'll process this requisition and have youout of here in a minute.

24900:14:03,328 --> 00:14:06,449- Is that a case of scotch there, Sergeant?- Mm-hmm.

250


21/31

00:14:07,718 --> 00:14:09,868How 'bout throwin' ina bottle or three?

25100:14:09,988 --> 00:14:12,048- Sure thing--- I wouldn't recommend that, sir.

25200:14:12,268 --> 00:14:16,018This stuff's been tampered with.One sip could kill ya.

25300:14:16,058 --> 00:14:18,594- Oh. Yeah.- Lousy Commies.

25400:14:18,619 --> 00:14:20,768Just follow me, sir.We'll take care of that generator.

25500:14:21,021 --> 00:14:24,360Damn well better.I've had two swiped here already!

25600:14:25,580 --> 00:14:29,332[Imitating Van Kirk] Lousy Commies.I've had two swiped here already.

25700:14:32,252 --> 00:14:33,872Do I hear three?

25800:14:38,472 --> 00:14:40,813- [Rings Bell]- Yeah?

25900:14:40,862 --> 00:14:43,811I'm from the 243rd Service and Supplyhere to pick up the generator.

26000:14:43,812 --> 00:14:46,172

- We're in kind of a hurry!- Requisition form?

26100:14:46,172 --> 00:14:49,663- No got!- I don't issue air without a requisition form.

26200:14:49,663 --> 00:14:53,733


22/31

Major Van Kirk just gave it to Hondo.By the way, don't rile the major.

26300:14:54,346 --> 00:14:56,882He knows you guys have kipedtwo of our generators already--

26400:14:56,882 --> 00:14:59,213not to mention othermiscellaneous door prizes.

26500:14:59,353 --> 00:15:03,013So just roll it out fast, or we blowthe whistle on this whole scam.

26600:15:03,123 --> 00:15:06,823- I'll just check with Hondo.- Better still, go over there yourself.

267

00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:10,333Then Major Van Kirk can chew outthe two of ya and not miss a bite.

26800:15:14,003 --> 00:15:17,353- [Cheering]- [Beeping]

26900:15:19,615 --> 00:15:22,163[Potter]Hot diggity dog tags, Klinger. You did it!

27000:15:22,163 --> 00:15:25,363- You got us a real live generator.- Klinger, how'd you pull it off?

27100:15:25,383 --> 00:15:28,883Well, it was one of those dealsyou got started. I just closed it.

27200:15:29,033 --> 00:15:31,303

- Well, nice goin', for sure!- Who cares how he got it?

27300:15:31,303 --> 00:15:33,754I never look a gift generatorin the mouth.

27400:15:34,026 --> 00:15:37,865


23/31

We better get this thing hooked up fast,before some sneaky devil swipes it!

27500:15:38,145 --> 00:15:40,765Good idea, Colonel.There's crooks everywhere.

27600:15:41,155 --> 00:15:42,795- [Motor Starts]- We're back in business, Colonel.

27700:15:42,795 --> 00:15:46,315Yeah, I'm not sure I trust thesenewfangled gadgets though, Hunnicutt.

27800:15:46,385 --> 00:15:48,085- Too many moving parts.- [Chuckles]

279

00:15:48,995 --> 00:15:50,835- Now for the real heartbreaker.- What's that?

28000:15:51,175 --> 00:15:53,705I've gotta go over to X-rayand tell the hamster he's out of work.

28100:15:53,845 --> 00:15:56,465Boy, sir, Klinger was really something,gettin' that generator, wasn't he?

28200:15:56,775 --> 00:15:58,526I guess I trained himbetter than I thought.

28300:15:58,586 --> 00:16:00,925I always knew he hadthe larceny in him.

28400:16:01,385 --> 00:16:04,775

Here, son.Kentucky sippin' whiskey.

28500:16:04,775 --> 00:16:07,855Now, don't gulp it.It has a boomerang effect.

28600:16:09,165 --> 00:16:12,716


24/31

[Sips, Gasps]

28700:16:14,776 --> 00:16:18,356- Smooth. [Coughs]- I told ya to sip it.

28800:16:19,005 --> 00:16:21,006- I did, sir.- Oh.

28900:16:22,856 --> 00:16:27,286Listen, Radar-- I guess you realizeI'm kinda fond of you.

29000:16:28,026 --> 00:16:31,175Lord knows, I've never meta soul I could depend on more.

29100:16:31,466 --> 00:16:35,056

But above all that,you've been a damn good friend.

29200:16:36,726 --> 00:16:39,846Well, friend,it's time we said good-bye.

29300:16:40,006 --> 00:16:42,099Time you got on with your life.

294

00:16:42,526 --> 00:16:44,666You've come as far as you can go here.

29500:16:45,386 --> 00:16:48,206You've earned your wings.Now you've gotta fly.

29600:16:50,406 --> 00:16:52,796- You're right, sir.- I am?

29700:16:53,356 --> 00:16:57,318Yeah. I was gonna tell you thatI decided to go home after all.

29800:16:57,648 --> 00:17:00,378- I really liked your speech though.- Thanks. [Chuckles]


25/31

29900:17:00,828 --> 00:17:02,878- I practiced all morning.- [Chuckles]

30000:17:04,199 --> 00:17:07,338Well, I've been thinking about howeverybody here wants me to be home...

30100:17:07,598 --> 00:17:09,928and Klinger'll get the hangof my job, sooner or later.

30200:17:10,908 --> 00:17:14,058- So it's time to go home.- It sure is, friend.

30300:17:15,588 --> 00:17:19,688And tomorrow, we're gonna give youone whiz-bang of a send-off.

30400:17:20,738 --> 00:17:22,188Hello. Excuse me.

30500:17:25,448 --> 00:17:27,628[On P.A.] Attention out there.Would Corporal Radar O'Reilly...

30600:17:27,628 --> 00:17:29,328please report to

his going-away party?

30700:17:29,328 --> 00:17:31,998All of your friends would love to see youwhile they can still see.

30800:17:32,158 --> 00:17:33,778Bye-bye. Buy bonds.

30900:17:37,378 --> 00:17:38,098

So?

31000:17:40,358 --> 00:17:42,938I think my tube of toothpasteopened down there.

31100:17:42,978 --> 00:17:44,618Finally, he does his laundry.


26/31

31200:17:45,038 --> 00:17:47,108Come on. Will you hurry up?You gotta leave in a few hours.

31300:17:47,128 --> 00:17:50,328- The nurses are warming up in the Mess Tent.- Oh, Hawkeye. Listen.

31400:17:51,198 --> 00:17:53,288Before we're together witheverybody, I just wanted to--

31500:17:53,488 --> 00:17:54,799No. No.

31500:17:55,788 --> 00:17:57,799Not until I've hada couple of bowls of punch.

31600:17:58,459 --> 00:18:00,719That way, I can cry andforget at the same time.

31700:18:01,751 --> 00:18:03,639- All right.- Yeah.

31800:18:04,258 --> 00:18:06,488

[Helicopters Whirring]

31900:18:07,769 --> 00:18:11,629Oh, no.Hawkeye! Hawkeye!

32000:18:12,139 --> 00:18:13,999- Hawkeye.- I hear them.

321

00:18:17,379 --> 00:18:20,100- Radar, there may not be time for--- I'll find ya, Hawkeye.

32200:18:23,759 --> 00:18:26,471- [Potter] Bad chest here.This one's for Winchester.- ...should get Major Winchester.


27/31

32300:18:27,551 --> 00:18:29,651- Guess that's the last time--- I guess that's the last time I'll hear that.

32400:18:29,651 --> 00:18:33,344- Colonel, we've got most of them numbered.- All right. Let's get into O.R., pronto!

32500:18:35,401 --> 00:18:38,161Well, son, I guess we cantake it from here.

32600:18:39,071 --> 00:18:41,061- Yes, sir. I guess you can.- [Shouting]

32700:18:43,171 --> 00:18:46,051Not exactly the way I wantedto say good-bye, Radar.

32800:18:46,801 --> 00:18:47,961Me either, sir.

32900:18:49,681 --> 00:18:51,062Godspeed, son.

33000:19:01,561 --> 00:19:02,575Bye, Radar.

33000:19:04,061 --> 00:19:05,775You know, you're okay.

33100:19:07,222 --> 00:19:08,861- [Man] Klinger!- Be right there!

33200:19:09,111 --> 00:19:11,651I'll make this short, kid.I'm not much on tearful good-byes.

33300:19:11,851 --> 00:19:14,961Hey, listen. This is for you.Take good care of it.

33400:19:16,141 --> 00:19:19,011That did it.I'll make you proud of me.


28/31

33500:19:19,031 --> 00:19:20,761- Klinger!- Coming!

33600:19:24,581 --> 00:19:26,751- Father!- Radar, you've been a real joy.

33700:19:26,751 --> 00:19:30,541- God bless you.- Thank you, Father. And thank God, too.

33800:19:30,601 --> 00:19:32,591I will. Bye.

33900:19:32,991 --> 00:19:34,661I'll say hello to your sister the sister.

34000:19:36,302 --> 00:19:39,172Best of luck in yourbucolic endeavors, Corporal.

34100:19:39,172 --> 00:19:42,291- And the same to you too, sir.- [Chuckles] Thank you, Walter.

34200:19:43,552 --> 00:19:45,512

- Radar!- Sir.

34300:19:45,562 --> 00:19:47,722It's all set. Peg and Erin will meet youat the San Francisco Airport.

34400:19:47,722 --> 00:19:49,382- Oh, good, sir.- Did you pack Erin's present?

34500:19:49,392 --> 00:19:52,212- For sure, sir.- All right. You tell 'em all about me.

34600:19:52,512 --> 00:19:54,242Yes, sir. I'll do that.

347


29/31

00:19:55,232 --> 00:19:58,332That's for Peg,and that's for Erin.

34800:19:58,552 --> 00:20:00,082I'll try to remember which is which.

34900:20:00,232 --> 00:20:02,292- [Man] Captain Hunnicutt! Over here!- Okay!

35000:20:03,052 --> 00:20:05,182You take care of yourself, pal.So long.

35100:20:13,932 --> 00:20:16,352[All Chattering]

35200:21:08,192 --> 00:21:09,112

Hi.

35200:21:09,592 --> 00:21:12,212I just wanted to say good-byeto you guys one more time.

35300:21:12,930 --> 00:21:16,209And listen, I don't want youto worry about nothin'.

354

00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:19,625'Cause instead of just me, you're gonnahave everybody takin' care of you now.

35500:21:21,699 --> 00:21:22,949I mean, except the cook.

35600:21:23,909 --> 00:21:25,299- [O.R. Chatter]- Hand me a suture.

35700:21:31,999 --> 00:21:33,129[B.J.]Give me a sponge.

35800:21:57,279 --> 00:21:58,799[Beeping]

359


30/31

00:22:06,829 --> 00:22:08,029Where are you headed?

36000:22:08,759 --> 00:22:11,076- Ottumwa, Iowa.- Never heard of it.

36100:22:11,229 --> 00:22:12,869Guess anywhereyou live is home.

36200:22:20,229 --> 00:22:23,099I'm ready. Let's go.

36300:22:24,689 --> 00:22:28,109[Engine Starts, Revs]

36400:22:45,010 --> 00:22:48,949You were a good boy in there, Pierce.

You only threw one clamp and two tantrums.

36500:22:48,949 --> 00:22:51,770Well, the finger's improved.It's up to excruciating.

36600:22:52,300 --> 00:22:55,580[Sighs] Warm night.Think I'll take a walk and unwind.

367

00:22:55,810 --> 00:22:57,020That sounds relaxing.

36800:22:58,160 --> 00:23:02,870I got a couple of flashlights. You canlook for mines. I'll check for snipers.

36900:23:05,177 --> 00:23:06,940Where do you suppose he is by now?

370

00:23:07,090 --> 00:23:08,760Doesn't matter. He's away from here.

37100:23:09,121 --> 00:23:11,000- Gonna miss that kid, you know?- Yeah.

37200:23:11,100 --> 00:23:13,240


31/31

I'm gonna namemy first wife after him.

37300:23:13,390 --> 00:23:14,580- Well, I've walked far enough.- Me too.

37400:23:14,580 --> 00:23:16,870Let's see if the bar's openin this place.

37500:23:18,180 --> 00:23:20,571He's probably halfwayto Hawaii by now.

37600:23:20,623 --> 00:23:22,550[Yawning] I don't wantto think about it anymore.

377

00:23:26,310 --> 00:23:28,340- Hey, boys.- Yeah? What?

37800:23:42,200 --> 00:23:43,530Good-bye, Radar.

Documents

MASH S08E05 Good-Bye, Radar (Part 2)