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Prepared for our institution by PaperClip Communications. Reproduced or retransmitted under license with PaperClip Communications.

Making Smart ChoicesAbout Alcohol

ollege is all about choices. And some ofthe most important choices your stu-dent will make this semester involvealcohol.

Many students believe that theirpeers are drinking like crazy, going out

every Wednesday through Sunday, no matter ifthey’re of legal drinking age. This myth often makesstudents feel like they have to “drink up” to meet peerstandards. Yet, the real story is that many studentsdon’t choose to drink or they drink responsibly. It’simportant for students to know the real deal so theycan make their choices based on self-responsibilityand what feels right, not perceived peer pressure.Parents’ Role

Parents play a key role in helping students makesmart decisions about alcohol. You remain a key influ-ence in your child’s life, believe it or not. So, considerhaving a proactive conversation about alcohol. Hereare some tips on how to do just that…Make it an Ongoing Conversation. This initial dis-

cussion will likely be the toughest to get started.Instead of lecturing, take this opportunity to openthe lines of communication between you and yourstudent so that you can keep talking about thisimportant topic. Find out how he feels about alco-hol and the peer pressure he faces on campus. Lethim know that you are always there to talk thingsthrough.

Set Clear Expectations. Since college is a privilege—and a large financial undertaking for any family—let your student know that you expect her tofocus on her personal development as well as heracademic pursuits. And you want her to set solidgoals for herself. Alcohol use/abuse should notderail any of these plans. And participating in ille-gal behaviors is unacceptable.

Help Them Learn to Say “No.” The desire to fit incan be mighty strong, even if it means saying“yes” to behaviors that you don’t agree with. Armyour student with some ideas about how todeflect alcohol pressures. If he’s involved in com-munity service, classes and other extracurricularactivities, he’ll have a ready-made “excuse:”

“Sorry I can’t join you… I have to do this…” Orhe can hang with friends and just drink water orsoda – no one has to know. Plus, saying “no” cancome in a variety offorms: “I’d love to godancing with youguys—just know that Iwon’t be drinkingtonight because I havean early meet/studygroup/activity tomor-row morning.” Or “Idon’t have much sparecash this month sowhy don’t we go seethe free comedian oncampus instead ofgoing out?” When stu-dents feel like theyhave options to use indifferent settings, saying “no” is that much easier!

Offer Practical Tips. Encourage your student tonever accept a drink from an unknown person orto leave her drink unattended. It’s too easy forsomeone to slip a colorless, odorless “date rapedrug” into the drink. Walking around with opencontainers in public places isn’t smart – it’s illegalin many states. More and more places have toolsin place to spot fake IDs so, it’s not worth the risk,especially since criminal records can impact futureemployment. And colleges always have trans-portation options so, don’t even think aboutdrinking and driving. Life can change in aninstant if you do.

Don’t Talk When a Student is Intoxicated. Youmay want to grab hold of a teachable moment yethaving a discussion when your student is intoxi-cated can get messy and be a waste of your time.Wait until the next day to talk when you’re bothmore level-headed.

Talk with Other College Parents. How do theyhandle alcohol-related conversations with theirstudents? What have they learned the hard way?What has worked? This source of info can beinvaluable!

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Be Upfront About Your Concerns.While solelyusing generalized scare tactics (i.e. “So many kidsdie at college because they drink!”) can turn stu-dents off, hearing your concerns directly can havean impact on students. “I’m afraid that if you getarrested for drinking, it will be on your recordand could show up on a background check whenyou’re going for your dream job” has a very dif-ferent tone—it uses the “I” voice and speaksdirectly to a real-life concern.

Don’t Glorify Your Own Alcohol Use. If you madeit through college or your young adult life abus-ing alcohol without any negative consequences,congratulations. You’re lucky. Glamorizing tales ofyour own alcohol abuse sets a poor example foryour student, though, and can make him feelinvincible (“If nothing happened to Dad, I’ll befine, too.”). Be a strong role model for good deci-sion-making instead.

Encourage Smart Decision Making. Talk abouthow, if an event is known for high-risk drinking,it’s best to steer clear— the peer pressure is boundto be high, dangerous situations will likely ariseand the possibility of the police stopping by isalmost a given. Same holds true for being alonewith someone you don’t know well, especially ifone or both of you have been drinking, becausethat’s where many sexual assaults begin.

Have a Calm, Open Conversation. When speakingwith your student about alcohol, stay calm and beopen. Encourage him to express his fears and con-cerns, and try to understand where he’s comingfrom. Don’t interrupt your student in the quest toget your point across. And try not to use “Yes…but…” sentences as the word “but” can invalidateanything you were saying beforehand.

Stay in Touch with Your Student. Keep up thecommunication so that your student feels com-fortable sharing college happenings with you.Instead of passing judgment, help your studentexamine her choices and make responsible deci-sions for herself.Students who let the campus alcohol culture just

“happen” to them by buying into campus myths andbuckling to peer pressure will likely have a toughtime at college. Those who talk with their parents andthink about their decision making ahead of time willlikely make smarter choices. And they’re the oneswho have a better chance of finishing college andcoming out stronger on the other end.

Sources: “Alcohol, Other Drugs, and College: AParent’s Guide” from The Higher Education Center forAlcohol and Other Drug Prevention,www.higheredcenter.org; “How to Talk to Your College AgeChild/Student About Alcohol & Other Drugs from theSubstance Abuse Prevention & Health Enhancement Officeat Syracuse University, http://sumweb.syr.edu/health/par-ents.htm; “A Message to Parents About High-RiskDrinking at College” from the Ohio College Initiative toReduce High Risk Drinking, www.higheredcenter.org/par-ents/ohio.pdf

Prepared for our institution by PaperClip Communications. Reproduced or retransmitted under license with PaperClip Communications.

Making Smart ChoicesAbout Alcohol

The Effects of Others’ DrinkingYour student may be negatively impacted by

others’ alcohol abuse in instances such as:� taking care of an intoxicated roommate or other

student� experiencing an unwanted sexual advance� having a loud hallway on weekend nights

when intoxicated residents return� getting into an argument with an intoxicated

individual� becoming a victim of sexual assault or date

rape� being hit, pushed or assaulted� being insulted or humiliated� not getting enough uninterrupted sleep or

study time� having property damaged

Encourage her to talk with residence hall staffmembers or other advocates (coaches, advisors,etc.) about the best way to handle such scenarios.Those folks are there to help all students enjoy theirright to a safe academic and living environment.

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