LeaderGuide Pro Leaderguide Template - Disaster …Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe. It will assist you in facilitating sessions to

Facilitator’s Guide

By Jim Greenman

In the Fall of 2005, Hurricane Katrina, followed by Hurricane Rita, wreaked havoc throughout the Gulf Coast, causing over a million people to evacuate their homes. Katrina literally blew away the finely woven fabric of many people’s lives: their homes, their families, their jobs, their pets, and the possessions that connect them to the past. Hurricanes Katrina and Rita left hundreds of thousands of people uprooted and homeless, adrift in a devastated world. Millions more, including children, witnessed the largest natural disaster in United States history with horror and empathy.

JPMorgan Chase, Mercy Corps, and Bright Horizons established Comfort for Kids to offer assistance to children and families affected by Katrina and Rita. As parents, educators, employers, relief workers, and caregivers, we want to provide children the support, reassurance, and understanding they need to understand the forces of nature that can disrupt and devastate the world as they know it. What Happened to MY World: Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe is intended to help parents, and all those who work with families and children during times of natural disaster.

Together we have an obligation to raise and educate a generation of health, vibrant children who are live in the world with confidence and wisdom, understanding the natural world, and committed to making the world a better place.

Copyright Jim Greenman, 2005 All rights reserved

Comfort for Kids, 200 Talcott Ave Watertown. MA. 02472 www.brighthorizons.com

GREENMAN, JIM What Happened to MY World: Helping Children Cope

with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe: Facilitator’s Guide

http://www.brighthorizons.com/

Facilitator’s Guide Table of Contents

Table of Contents

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS iINTRODUCTORY MATERIAL Introduction iii

Getting Started iv

About This Guide iv

The Session in Perspective viii

Session Preparation ix

Session at a Glance xiii

SEGMENTS Welcome and Introductions - Overview 1

Welcome and Introductions 2

Pillars of Security - Overview 6

Pillars of Security 7

Helping Children Cope - Overview 9

Helping Children Cope 10

Open Forum - Overview 24

Open Forum 25

Closing - Overview 27

Closing 28

Optional Post-Session Dialogue - Overview 30

Optional Post-Session Dialogue 31

Tips for Facilitating Discussions 32

A Question and Response Guide for Facilitators 36

Key Points at a Glance 41

MATERIALS Handouts 49

Overhead Slides 71

Facilitator’s Guide Acknowledgements

Acknowledgements

Grateful appreciation to the following:

Karen Bernstein and Mamie McIndoe for ideas and support.

Special thanks to:

Ruthanne Russell for contributions to the Facilitator Guide for the original What Happened to the World? Helping Children Cope in Turbulent Times.

Griffen Samples for major contributions, reviewing and copyediting.

Maggie Stanley for copyediting, ideas and writing.

Meredith Fender for copyediting.

Page i

Facilitator’s Guide Introduction

Page iii

Introduction

In the wake of the Asian Tsunami, Hurricanes Katrina and Rita, and the ongoing aftermath, adults and children all over the world witnessed the awful power of nature. What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe was developed as a resource for parents, teachers, and anyone working with children. The goal of the book is to help adults peer into the minds of children, from infancy through the teenage years, and understand their fears, their grief, and their struggles to understand why, through the acts of nature or human beings, the ground under their feet can disappear and the world can become a very frightening place. It is to help both those who experience and survive catastrophe first hand, as well as the children who witness from a distance and wonder what it was like or whether they will find themselves in similar circumstances. The What Happened to MY World? Facilitator’s Guide is based on content in What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe. It will assist you in facilitating sessions to help parents, professionals, and volunteers working with children develop strategies for supporting children in a crisis. The session is an opportunity to bring adults together in an open forum, where they can share insights, comments, and questions about the reactions and behaviors they are witnessing in the children for whom they care. The Facilitator’s Guide has a comprehensive, user-friendly format that includes everything you will need to facilitate the session, from facilitation tips and overheads to an easy-to-use, step-by-step outline for the session. The guide includes a handout section that can be reproduced and distributed to participants for the session. Also included are a number of sample questions, taken from actual sessions, with sample responses. The Facilitator’s Guide accommodates a broad range of facilitation experiences. It is a tool for facilitators with a background in training and facilitation and those who have minimal experience with facilitating larger group discussions. The guide provides you with options for various facilitation styles, using overheads or flipcharts or more participatory styles that guide discussion toward several key points. The guide allows for varying the length of the session, depending upon the size of the group, time constraints, and the needs of the participants. It’s never easy to be a parent, teacher, or one who works with children. The task of supporting children and families is made even more challenging during times of catastrophe. While What Happened to MY World? is a response to the 2004 Asian Tsunami and the devastation of 2005’s Hurricane’s Katrina and Rita and their continuing aftermath, the insights apply to other natural disasters and personal and societal calamities. Bringing people together to talk about supporting our children in troubling times has real value. The What Happened to MY World? Facilitator’s Guide is designed to help you facilitate those important discussions.

Facilitator’s Guide Getting Started

Page iv

Getting Started

About This Guide

What is the purpose of this guide?

This facilitator’s guide is designed to help you prepare for and facilitate a discussion with parents and/or people who work with children about helping children cope in the aftermath of natural disaster or crisis. The session is based on the material in the What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster or Catastrophe

What will I find in the guide?

This facilitator’s guide is a comprehensive package that contains:

Checklists of necessary materials and equipment

Presentation scripts and key points to cover

Optional approaches to the session

Facilitation tips and techniques

A sampling of potential questions

Key points at a glance

Reproducible overheads and handouts


Page v

About This Guide

How is this guide organized?

This guide includes everything you need to facilitate a 60- to 90-minute session: step-by-step instructions; facilitation tips; a listing of sample questions, overheads and handouts.

This section, “Getting Started,” contains all of the preparation information for the What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe session, such as session objectives, pre-work, required materials, room set-up, and facilitation preparation.

Following this section is the “Session at a Glance” table. This table can serve as your overview reference, showing the segment names, suggested timings, and descriptions of the activities that make up the session.

The session itself is divided into segments, each of which is comprised of one or more content areas. Each segment begins with a one-page summary showing the purpose, time, process, and materials for the segment. Use these summary pages to get an overview of the segment that follows.

Following the session outline you will find “Tips for Facilitating Discussions” and “A Question and Response Guide for Facilitators.” You will also find the “Key Points at a Glance” table for easy reference during the session. Finally, this guide provides reproducible handouts and overheads.

Session Preparation, continued

About This Guide, continued


Page vi


How is the text laid out in this guide?

Every action in the session outline is described by a text block like this one, with a margin icon, a title line, and the actual text. The icons are designed to help catch your eye and draw quick attention to “what to do and how to do it.” For example, the icon to the left indicates that you, the facilitator, say something next. The title line gives a brief description of what to do, and is followed by the actual script, instruction set, key points, etc. that are needed to complete the action.

A complete list of the margin icons is provided on the following page.

FACILITATOR NOTE

You may also occasionally find facilitator notes such as this one in the text of the session outline. These shaded boxes provide particularly important information in an attention-getting format.


Page vii


Graphic Icons

Segment Purpose

Overhead Book or Handouts

Segment Process

Welcome

Time Transition Flipchart Question &

Response Key Points

Materials Required

To Say


Page viii

The Session in Perspective

Why present a What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe Times session?

The session is intended to give parents and caregivers the understanding and tools to help children cope with the aftermath of a natural disaster or catastrophic situation. The purpose is to provide a forum where parents or professionals feel comfortable enough to share thoughts, feelings, and insights and ask sensitive questions. Every session will be different, because it will be shaped by the interests and needs of the participants.

Session Objectives

After completing the session, participants will have:

Participated in a discussion on children’s reactions to natural disaster and the aftermath

Learned ideas and language for responding to children’s reactions and questions

Had an opportunity to ask questions and share stories

Discussed the need to promote tolerance and respect for diversity

Identified resource materials for future use

Session Timing

The session is designed to feature 30 minutes of facilitator-led discussion and 30 to 60 minutes of an open forum, which, depending on the number of participant questions, could go longer. A post-session time for individual discussion may be desirable with one or more support facilitators. Throughout the outline you’ll be provided suggestions for variations on facilitation and timing.

Number of Participants

The session is appropriate for groups of any size, limited only by space and the ability to respond to participant questions. Larger groups may require a change from a discussion format to a question and response format.


Page ix

Session Preparation

Pre-Work

No pre-work is required for participants.

Materials

Participant materials:

– Copies for each participant of the What Happened to MY World? book

or

– Copies for each participant of the handouts, reproducible from the masters included in this guide

Pre-made flipcharts or overheads with projector (optional)

New flipchart paper and markers (optional)

Other resource materials as available

Refreshments (optional)

Room Set-Up

Create a relaxed tone for the session by offering refreshments such as coffee, juice, and cookies. Chairs and/or tables should be arranged in rows or a U-shape format facing the facilitator and flipchart or screen if an overhead projector is being used.


Page x

Session Preparation

Facilitator Preparation

The facilitator should read and be thoroughly knowledgeable about the What Happened to MY World? book and other resources being distributed. You should visit a few of the websites listed as resources to comment on during the session.

The facilitator should also read and be thoroughly knowledgeable about this guide. This guide offers various facilitation options for each content area – typically the first option will be a presentation style and the second will be a participatory style. You should determine which style best suits your experience and the participants’ needs. You will then need to insert personal stories that will expand upon key points.

The facilitator should then prepare the flipcharts or overheads in advance. Flipcharts or overheads are not required but are very useful to systematically provide key information. You may wish to focus more or less time presenting on the different content areas and make the important points during the forum.

We have also included two pre-made flipcharts or overheads that offer strategies for the classroom and can be used if your group is composed primarily of teachers and caregivers.

The facilitator should arrive at the session early in order to set up refreshments, if offered, and check the logistics for the room set-up, such as the location of the restrooms.



Page xi

Session Preparation

Facilitator Options

The following step-by-step guide has been designed for facilitators with varying levels of experience leading groups and familiarity with the content. Review all of the options and determine which facilitation style best matches your experience with facilitation and your knowledge of the content presented.

For session facilitators who have little to no experience facilitating, we recommend that you follow the guide exactly as designed without using any of the “Facilitation Options.” This will allow you to get comfortable with the content and flow of the session, and allow for smooth transitions from segment to segment. Using all of the pre-made flipcharts or overheads will make your session somewhat formal; however, this will enable you to cover all of the content suggested. In order to help you adhere to the recommended timeframes, ask participants to hold their questions until the “Open Forum” segment. Inform them that you will have plenty of time to answer their questions and share stories. Again, this will make the session somewhat formal, but will help you feel comfortable that you can manage the content and flow of the session. After you facilitate a few sessions, you will probably move to a combination of pre-made flipcharts and facilitation options.

For session facilitators with some facilitation experience, you may want to use a variation of the pre-made flipcharts or overheads and the suggested “Facilitation Options.” This format will allow you to cover the main points for which you may require some content or process support, while using open facilitation style for those content points for which you do not need any prompt. This combination style will set a more relaxed, open environment and will allow you some security on content points, as well as keeping you on track. You may choose to take questions throughout the content segment or hold until the “Open Forum,” depending on your comfort level with being able to stay on track to cover the content suggested. Taking questions throughout creates a more informal session; however, if you are concerned with covering all of the content points, you may want to hold questions until the forum.



Page xii

Session Preparation

For those of you who have extensive experience facilitating sensitive sessions and knowledge of the content, we suggest that you use all of the “Facilitation Options” suggested and not the pre-made flipcharts or overheads. Use the “Key Points at a Glance” table to ensure that you cover the key content points throughout the session. We would also recommend that you take questions throughout the session and allow for the key concerns of the participants to guide the content and session flow. This style of facilitation will provide the most informal and relaxed environment for the session.

All three facilitation options will meet the session objectives of providing a forum to share questions and insights, while offering guidance about children’s reactions and resources. The way in which you elect to facilitate your session will depend on your experience with facilitating and knowledge of the content. Regardless of which facilitation style you use, it’s important that you manage your time well. Be sure to leave enough time for the “Open Forum,” which is the most important part of the session. We believe that the guide provides you with a framework and all of the resources necessary to allow participants a forum to communicate and learn to better meet children’s needs.


Facilitator’s Guide Session at a Glance

Page xiii

Session at a Glance

Time Segment Description

5 minutes Welcome and Introductions

The facilitator greets participants as they arrive. The facilitator then introduces him/herself and any supporting facilitators. Next, the facilitator establishes why they are there. Finally, the facilitator uses the pre-made flipcharts or overheads to show the session outline.

5-10 minutes Pillars of Security The facilitator briefly outlines the pillars of security that children depend on: people, place, routine, and ritual; pillars that are often threatened or weakened in crisis.

20-30 minutes

Helping Children Cope

The facilitator will facilitate a discussion through brief presentations and dialogue strategies, utilizing pre-made flipcharts or overheads (optional) to clarify children’s reactions to the crisis, typical behaviors, strategies for handling children’s questions, and taking care of yourself. The facilitator will point out children’s behaviors that are cause for concern.

25 to 55 minutes

Open Forum

The facilitator will facilitate this discussion by using open-ended questions, silence technique, and open body language to encourage participation.

5 minutes Closing The facilitator will review the objectives of the session and convey a sense of hope to participants. The facilitator will once again refer participants to the What Happened to MY World? book as a resource. Finally, the facilitator will reintroduce any supporting facilitators for any further questions and be available for comments from the participants.

15 to 30 minutes (not figured in session length)

Optional Post-Session Dialogue

After bringing the session to a close, the facilitator will invite participants to stay and address any additional questions or comments to the facilitator, any supporting facilitators, and/or other participants.

Facilitator’s Guide Welcome and Introductions

Page 1

Welcome and Introductions

Purpose

The purpose of this segment is to introduce the facilitator, establish credibility, make a personal connection with the group, introduce any supporting facilitators, and present the session objectives.

Time

5 minutes

Process

The facilitator greets participants as they arrive. The facilitator then introduces him/herself and any supporting facilitators. Next, the facilitator establishes why they are there. Finally, the facilitator uses the pre-made flipcharts or overheads to show the session outline.

Materials Needed

What Happened to MY World? book or handouts for each participant

Pre-made flipcharts/overheads (optional)

New flipchart paper and markers


Page 2


Greet participants as they arrive.

FACILITATOR NOTE

By standing at the door to greet participants as they arrive, you make an immediate connection, which will help relax participants. If you maintain an open posture, smile, and make direct eye contact with participants, it invites good communication. Crossing your arms or standing behind a podium or desk can discourage discussion.

Introduce yourself, establish credibility, and make a connection with the group by providing the information below.

Make the following key points about yourself:

Give your name.

Give professional and personal experience.

Give educational background (if relevant).

Describe current work as it relates to caring for children or working with families and reactions to the events of a natural disaster or the ongoing aftermath.

Make a personal connection with the group by sharing a story that relates to a natural disaster or catastrophe and what you witnessed in yourself, your family or friends, or the children and/or families you serve.

Introduce any supporting facilitators.


Page 3

Welcome and Introductions, continued

Show Overhead 1: Why Are We Here?

To share feelings, questions, and insights to help children cope in turbulent times

To discuss how to respond to children’s reactions and questions

To share with you some resources for additional support

FACILITATION OPTIONS

Option 1: Do not use the pre-made flipchart/overhead; instead describe the three points listed above.

Option 2: Ask participants the question, “Why are you here?” and take responses from the group. You might want to write down responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Make sure that the three items outlined above are represented. If anyone in the group has an expectation that will not be met, please acknowledge that their expectation will not be met and move on.

Distribute the What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe book or handouts.

Inform participants that the content of the session is based on the information provided in the What Happened to MY World? book or handouts. We won't be following the book page by page; however, we may reference sections.


Page 4


Show Overhead 2: Session Outline

Pillars of Security

"Normal" reactions in the aftermath of a natural disaster or crisis

Strategies for dealing with children's reactions and questions

Ways to determine when behaviors are cause for concern and may require additional support

Promoting resiliency for others

Taking care of yourself

Open forum for sharing feelings, questions, and insights

Review the session outline.

FACILITATOR NOTE

This session is designed to take most of the questions during the “Open Forum” segment. However, if you prefer to take questions as you go, please let participants know that you will be taking questions throughout the session.

Ask the group the following four questions:

How many of you are parents, grandparents, or caregivers of children under three?

How many of you are parents, grandparents, or caregivers of preschool children?

How many of you are parents, grandparents, or caregivers of elementary-school-age children?

How many of you are parents, grandparents, or caregivers of children in junior high or high school?


Page 5


FACILITATOR NOTE

Ask the above questions to determine the age groups of interest to the participants in your group. As you present the material that follows, you can give greater time and emphasis to the age groups most represented.

Transition to Pillars of Security

Tell participants that you are going to begin to talk about “the pillars of security” that keep us feeling safe and sound, that may be threatened or disappear during time of crisis.

Facilitator’s Guide Pillars of Security

Page 6

Pillars of Security

Purpose

The purpose of this segment is to provide parents and caregivers with pertinent information about what forms the basis of a child’s (or adult’s) security: people, place, routine, and ritual.

Time

10 minutes

Process

The facilitator will facilitate a discussion through brief presentation or solicitation of responses to the question: “what do you need to feel secure?”

Materials Needed





Page 7

Pillars of Security

Introduce the idea that we feel secure when the world is safe, predictable, and manageable. We know we can fit into that world as ourselves and will be accepted by the people we encounter. We are with people we trust, and we know what to expect or have confidence that our life experience gives us the skills to cope with whatever will come our way. This is often the exact opposite of how we feel in a crisis situation.

Show Overhead 3: Pillars of Security

People

Place

Routine

Ritual

People: The most insecure feeling of all is feeling alone—no hand to hold, no one to look up to, no one to warn us, no arms to hold us when we stumble. We need familiar, trusted, loved ones who know and understand us, and who we know and understand. When these people are behaving unpredictably (as often happens in crisis), or worse, we have no one and are surrounded by strangers, a sense of security is hard to come by.

• Place: In our homes, we can relax. We take comfort in the familiar order, the sounds, sights, and smells. We know our way around and how things work. There are few surprises.

• Routine: Routines are patterns of actions and expectations, the familiar order of the day and the tasks that we do protect us from the fear of the unknown.

Ritual: Our lives are orderly and meaningful with daily rites we enjoy; like the first cup of coffee in our favorite cup, or goodbye kisses.

The four pillars are not equal; certainly people matter the most. But place, routine, and ritual are essential and support the first pillar.


Page 8

When you are a child (or adult) in a crisis, all four pillars—people, place, routine, ritual—may become shaky or crumble and your world may feel as though it is crashing down upon you – strange people, place, routine, and few rituals. Creating a sense of security requires rebuilding the pillars as best we can.

FACILITATION OPTION

An alternative to presenting the above information is to ask participants the question, “What makes you feel secure when you are anxious? Write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper.

Comment upon participant responses as appropriate and fit into the 4 pillars. Or ask suppose you are alone whisked away to a foreign country you know nothing about, like Borneo. What would make it more manageable? (A friend, coming to know the place, and knowing the routines, and rituals.)

Transition to Helping Children Cope

Pillars of Security, continued

Facilitator’s Guide Helping Children Cope

Page 9


Purpose

The purpose of this segment is to provide parents and caregivers with pertinent information about children’s reactions to turbulent times, strategies for helping our children cope, and strategies for helping adults take care of themselves.

Time

25 minutes

Process

The facilitator will facilitate a discussion through brief presentations and dialogue strategies, utilizing pre-made flipcharts or overheads (optional) to clarify children’s reactions to the crisis, typical behaviors, strategies for handling children’s questions, and taking care of yourself. The facilitator will point out children’s behaviors that are cause for concern.

Materials Needed





Page 10


Introduce the idea that natural disasters on the scale of Katrina and its aftermath, and the Asian Tsunami are shocking to everyone. The prospect of other large scale, seasonal natural disasters, including earthquakes, mudslides, and tornados create fears in children and adults. For many of those survivors in the path of natural disaster, life will never be the same. Of course, losses range widely, from the loss of peace of mind to the destruction of everything you have, including loved ones. It is important to know your audience and recognize the degree and intensity of loss without appearing to slight anyone; acknowledging that the experience for anyone, children and adults, can be serious and traumatic. At the same time, the experience of some may have been far more severe, the road to hope and recovery longer and more difficult.

As you present the following information, please reference the What Happened to MY World? book for participants to view complete lists and the handouts for additional information.

Acknowledge that the first step in helping children is to sort through our own reactions and feelings and get the support that we need. Children’s sense of safety and hope stems from our strength, our calm, and our reason.

Introduce the common emotional reactions listed below.


Page 11

Show Overhead 4: Common Emotional Reactions to Crisis – Adults and Older Children

Shock

Confusion

Fear

Sadness

Anger

Guilt or shame

Helplessness

Anxiety/worry

Alienation and isolation

Select four or five reactions from the list and give brief personal examples as appropriate.

FACILITATION OPTION

An alternative to presenting the above information is to ask participants the question, “What are some common emotional reactions to a crisis that you have seen?” and write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Comment upon participant responses as appropriate.

Helping Children Cope, continued


Page 12


Emotional reactions to a crisis lead to some common changes in behavior that participants may be seeing in themselves and others.

Introduce the common behavioral changes listed below.

Show Overhead 5: Common Changes in Behavior – Adults and Older Children

Increased or decreased appetite

Altered sleeping patterns

Fatigue

Confusion/indecision

Anxious behavior

Crying

Short temper

Headaches and other minor ailments such as stomachaches

Withdrawal

Briefly discuss a few of the behaviors listed above. Add brief personal examples as appropriate.

Note that we will return to the idea of taking care of yourself later in the session.

FACILITATION OPTION

An alternative to presenting the above information is to ask participants the question, “What changes in behavior have you seen in the aftermath of the storm or other crises?” and write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Comment upon participant responses as appropriate.


Page 13


Direct participants to the What Happened to MY World? book for a more comprehensive list of emotional reactions and behavioral changes, or to the handouts for additional information.

Transition from talking about adults and older children to talking about the reactions of younger children in a crisis.

Every child is a different individual in a different situation and there is no right or wrong way for a child to react to a crisis or stress. Normal reactions vary from seeming indifferent to a state of continued alarm. Some children are far more sensitive than others. Some children are more resilient. We will be discussing some common/normal reactions and behaviors. What is most important is that parents know their own children and look for behavioral changes, and relate the current behavior to behavior prior to the crisis – not all behavior will be reactions to the crisis.

Emphasize that children who are already troubled due to divorce or other family issues, death of a loved one or of a pet, may see their feelings worsen in times of crisis. These children will need extra attention from the adults around them.

If you are using the What Happened to MY World? book, reference the sections “Every Child Is Different” and “Knowing the Child.”

Introduce information about the reactions of children under 3: “They know something is up – all their senses tell them that things are not the same and not quite right.”


Page 14


Make the following key points:

Children under 3 can only express their reactions through the language of behavior and may:

Exhibit altered eating or sleeping patterns

Be contrary

Cling to a parent

Cry more than usual

Introduce information about the reactions of preschool children: “They know more than you think, and much of it is incomplete or misconceived.”


Preschool children often fear abandonment. They may want to be powerful and play to act powerfully. They may react by:

Playing out current events by portraying heroes, villains, and/or violence. Children use play to try to make sense of the world.

Regress to a younger behavior: previously potty-trained children may have accidents or wet the bed

Have nightmares, difficulty sleeping and want to sleep with parents

Express fears (of stormy weather, the dark, water and of you leaving)

Become clingy and afraid of being left alone

Get into power struggles, become negative

Want to help


Page 15


Introduce information about the reactions of elementary-school-age children: “They know more than you think and want to know more.”


Elementary-school-age children may:

Express curiosity about the details, including morbid details

Become clingy and whiny

Show aggressive behavior at home and/or school

Show loss of interest and poor concentration in school

Develop headaches and/or other physical ailments

Seem indifferent

Introduce information about the reactions of children in junior high or high school: “They know more than you think and want to know more, but not always from you, and they may or may not want to share.”


Children in junior high or high school may:

Experience appetite and sleep disturbance

Show increase or decrease in energy level

Show indifference

Refuse to be cooperative

Experience minor physical aliments

Withdraw and become isolated

Worry about their future


Page 16


FACILITATION OPTION

After introducing each age group, instead of presenting the above information you might ask participants, “What reactions are you seeing in your children or the children you serve?” Write participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper according to age group.

Please note that you have now covered about half of the content in this segment. You have 25 minutes to present all of the material, so please be aware of your timing.

The “Open Forum” that follows the content segment is the most important objective of the session. Be sure to allow enough time for the “Open Forum.” It is recommended that you have a minimum of 25 minutes to address participants’ insights, questions, and concerns.

Transition to discussing strategies for Helping Children Cope.

Remind participants that the most important reaction to their children is to listen and answer questions honestly and at the maturity level they can handle. They need consistent reassurance that they, you, and the world will be okay.

Introduce strategies for helping children cope with the emotions that follow a crisis.


Page 17


Show Overhead 6: Strategies for Helping Children Cope

Children pick up on our anxiety and fear; therefore, we need to be as strong as we can be and let them know that they are safe through physical and verbal reassurance.

It doesn’t work to try to completely shelter children from information regarding a crisis; be honest and give age-appropriate, factual information. Ask them what they know.

Listen, listen, listen – when they seek to communicate. Encourage children to ask as many questions as necessary. Children of all ages need to know that we are here for them.

Show Overhead 7: Strategies for Helping Children Cope

Try and minimize children’s exposure to television, radio, magazines, and newspapers during news of death and destruction.

Try and keep established routines and rituals, and strengthen bedtime rituals for preschool and school-age children.

Remember that children use play to make sense of their emotions and may engage in fantasy play that involves powerful forces of destruction, heroes, and villains. Such play is normal and healthy, but do not allow hurting – physically or emotionally.

Allow children who are "acting out" to release anger in a safe environment.

Help children get involved with relief efforts.

FACILITATOR NOTE

The content of the actual pre-made flipchart/overhead is a slightly condensed version of the above list. Use the information above to elaborate on these strategies.


Page 18


Briefly discuss a few of the strategies listed above. Add brief personal examples as appropriate.

FACILITATION OPTION

An alternative to presenting the above information is to ask participants the question, “What are some strategies you are using to help children cope?” and write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Comment upon participant responses as appropriate.

If you are using the What Happened to MY World? book, reference coping strategies, listed by age group. If you are using the handouts, reference “Helping Children Cope with Stress: A Quick Summary.”

Transition to talking about ways that parents can find out if their children need help outside of the family.


Most children who have been through traumatic rescue, lost family, homes, or have been or still are homeless will likely have symptoms of stress for a long time until their life stabilizes and the future looks clearer or brighter.

Symptoms for children who evacuated or observed a disaster from a distance without significant loss usually disappear as families adjust to a “new normal.” Look for serious, continuous changes in behavior not typical of your child.

Watch for behaviors that are prohibiting children from living their lives, particularly acting out or withdrawal.

Not sleeping is normal; having nightmares every night or throwing up every night is not.


Page 19


Transition to Answering Children’s Questions.

Introduce some strategies for answering children’s questions.

Show Overhead 8: Answering Children’s Questions

Get your own feelings and thoughts straight. Share your feelings, but always be strong and calm. Offer the reassurances you can.

Think about what you want to say and how you want it to come across.

Ask children what they think the words that they are using mean - death, flood, hurricane (or other disaster), looting, etc. - and what feelings they are having.

Ask what’s on the child’s mind and follow his or her lead. Recognize the clues in the child’s art, play, and/or conversations.

Respect the growing ability of older children to understand issues.

Protect your child’s idealism and ability to respect and love the natural world. Stay alert to stereotyping based on race or socioeconomic factors, and generalized fears. Work for cross-cultural understanding and understanding of the natural world.

Be alert for opportunities to steer children toward helping others actively.

FACILITATOR NOTE



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Briefly discuss a few of the strategies listed above. Add brief personal examples as appropriate.

FACILITATION OPTIONS

An alternative to presenting the above information is to ask participants the question, “What are some strategies you are using to answer children’s questions?” and write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Comment upon participant responses as appropriate.

A second option is to do an exercise with participants to give them practice in answering questions. There is a list of questions in the handouts. Split the group into pairs or triads. Give each person a question from the sample questions, and have them practice in their small groups. Process in the large group asking how it went, and for some examples. Process around reinforcing the key principles noted above.

Refer participants to “Answering Children’s Questions” in the What Happened to MY World? book or the handouts.

If the group is composed primarily of teachers and caregivers, please see the “Facilitation Option” below. If not, please move ahead to the “Transition to Taking Care of Yourself.”

FACILITATION OPTION

If the group is composed primarily of teachers and caregivers, we suggest that you facilitate a discussion about what teachers and caregivers can do to help children understand the natural world and become good people and citizens. The next two pre-made flipcharts/overheads offer strategies for promoting these characteristics in children.


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Introduce some strategies that teachers and caregivers can use to help children come to understand the natural world.

Show Overhead 9: What Those Who Work With Children Can Do – Learning Opportunities

Expand children’s knowledge of the natural world through projects and experiments that involve growing things, measuring and tracking weather conditions.

Provide books, pictures, music, films, food, art, excursions, and visitors to learn more about nature, natural disasters, poverty, respect for others, conflict, and overcoming fear and adversity.

Provide materials that encourage children’s play and expression of their feelings and thoughts.

Show Overhead 10: What Those Who Work with Children Can Do - Growing Good People

Value and respect individual children and try to eliminate stressful situations when necessary.

Research and respect differences in identity, culture, economic differences, and beliefs.

Notice poverty, unfairness, and injustice in daily life and the news, and call children’s attention to them as appropriate.

Encourage empathy by encouraging the safe and respectful discussion of feelings of hurt, fear, loss, and doubt.

Help children try to find hope, goodness, and courage in every tragedy.

Help children take humanitarian action, and take action with them.

Work with families as partners.

FACILITATOR NOTE



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Briefly discuss a few of the strategies above, using personal examples as appropriate.

FACILITATION OPTION

An alternative to presenting the information in the above two pre-made flipcharts/overheads is to ask participants the question, “What can we do in our classrooms to promote understanding of the natural world and to help children become good people?” and then write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Comment upon participant responses as appropriate.

Transition to Taking Care of Yourself.

Children need our strength and calm, even when we are feeling fearful, uncertain and unsafe. We can't take care of our children if we don't take care of ourselves. Listed are some helpful strategies to help adults take care of themselves.

Show Overhead 11: Taking Care of Yourself

Follow routines and rituals that nourish your needs and spirit.

Live well: eat right, get exercise, sleep, and drink plenty of water.

Minimize alcohol intake.

Take breaks from the news and headlines.

Talk about your feelings with other adults.

Give yourself some slack for behavior under stress.

Take time to do something fun.

Don't let your child be your caretaker.

Feel your feelings; observe yourself without judgment; cry.

Avoid negative people who bring you down.


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Briefly discuss a few of the ideas listed above. Add brief examples as appropriate.

FACILITATION OPTION

An alternative to presenting the above information is to ask participants the question, “What are some ways that you can take care of yourself?” and write down participant responses on a new sheet of flipchart paper. Comment upon participant responses as appropriate.

If you are using the What Happened to MY World? book, direct participants to more strategies for “Taking Care of Yourself.”

Transition to Open Forum

Tell participants that we have shared a lot of information about what we think are normal reactions in children, ways to deal with those reactions, ideas about tolerance, and strategies for taking care of yourself. Now it’s time to open the discussion to hear any comments, questions, or stories that they would like to share.

Facilitator’s Guide Open Forum

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Open Forum

Purpose

The purpose of this segment is to provide an open forum for participants to ask questions, share stories, and provide comments about how they and their children are coping during these turbulent times.

Time

25 to 55 minutes

Process

The facilitator will facilitate this discussion by using open-ended questions, silence technique, and open body language to encourage participation.

Materials Needed

None


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Open Forum

FACILITATOR NOTE

As you facilitate the “Open Forum,” pay attention to the way you ask questions of the group. While asking, “Do you have any questions?” may be met with silence, asking “What thoughts or questions do you have?” will generally elicit a greater response. The key here is to create a warm and safe environment for people to ask sensitive questions. Use open body language (arms relaxed and by your side, leaning slightly forward) and good eye contact to encourage participants to speak. It can also be helpful to use the silence technique: ask an open-ended question and wait a minimum of 10 seconds before asking another; typically somebody will respond within that timeframe.

Conduct the What Happened to MY World? Open Forum.

Ask participants:

What questions do you have?

What stories would you like to share?

FACILITATOR NOTE

You do not need to respond to participant questions immediately. Take time and be thoughtful in your responses. You might want to redirect the question to the group or any supporting facilitators by asking, “Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions about this situation that they’d like to offer?” If a question is out of your professional realm or expertise, acknowledge that and suggest that participants investigate the other resources and websites provided in the book or handouts.


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Open Forum, continued

Ten minutes before the end of the forum, let participants know that there is time remaining for one more question.

FACILITATOR NOTE

Be prepared to mention a few of the websites in the book or handouts by viewing some of the sites prior to facilitating the session.

Transition to Closing

Tell participants that we have discussed some thought-provoking questions, and we will surely have many more. Raising our children is complicated in any time. If using the What Happened to MY World? book; refer participants to more ideas about how to talk to your children about natural disaster, homelessness, and other topics. There are also a number of websites listed by category for additional help. The handouts will also list some of the websites.

Facilitator’s Guide Closing

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Closing

Purpose

The purpose of this segment is to review the objectives for the session and leave participants with the message that in times of crisis, children need our strength, our wisdom, and our reassurance. They need our best as human beings.

Time

5 minutes

Process

The facilitator will review the objectives of the session and convey a sense of hope to participants. The facilitator will once again refer participants to the What Happened to MY World? book as a resource. Finally, the facilitator will reintroduce any supporting facilitators for any further questions and be available for comments from the participants.

Materials Needed



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Closing

Remind participants that we have talked about a lot of emotional and serious things and we all have an incredible ability to influence others, especially our children Empathy and a little courage or kindness goes a long way, and every little contribution helps everyone.

Share a story of courage or kindness that has given you hope or strengthened your faith in our ability to live with nature and continue on despite natural disaster and catastrophe.

FACILITATION OPTION

Instead of providing your own story, you might ask participants to share a story of kindness that they have witnessed.

FACILITATOR NOTE

In your closing, use a confident, upbeat tone of voice and open body language to promote a sense of hope.

Reintroduce supporting facilitators and others in the room who can respond to additional questions.

Remind participants to consult the What Happened to MY World? book or the handouts in the future. Mention the resources available at www.brighthorizons.com and www.mercycorps.org

Thank participants for their honesty and participation before closing the session.


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Closing, continued

FACILITATOR NOTE

Be prepared and available to stay after the session to deal with questions/comments from participants.

Transition to Optional Post-Session Dialogue

Invite any participants who have questions or comments that have not yet been addressed to stay and talk with the facilitator, any supporting facilitators, and/or other participants after the close of the session.

Facilitator’s Guide Optional Post-Session Dialogue

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Purpose

The purpose of this segment is to give the facilitator and any supporting facilitators’ time to follow up with participants on any additional questions or comments they may have.

Time

15 to 30 minutes (not figured in session length)

Process

After bringing the session to a close, the facilitator will invite participants to stay and address any additional questions or comments to the facilitator, any supporting facilitators, and/or other participants.

Materials Needed

None

Facilitator’s Guide Optional Post-Session Dialogue

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Conduct the Post-Session Dialogue.

Invite any participants who have questions or comments that have not yet been addressed to stay and speak with the facilitator, any supporting facilitators, and/or other participants. This dialogue may last 15 to 30 minutes.

Thank individual participants for sharing their questions, insights, or concerns.

After the last participant leaves, clear away all materials and refreshments, and return the chairs and/or tables to their original arrangement. Adhere to any facilities requirements regarding lights, alarms, locked doors, etc.

Facilitator’s Guide Tips for Facilitating Discussions

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Tips for Facilitating Discussions

Any open discussion has the possibility of being diminished by participant characteristics: the know-it-all, the over-participator, the needy, the rambler, or the antagonist. However, with the appropriate facilitator response, most situations will not become disturbing to other members of the session. It is the facilitator’s responsibility to create an environment where everyone feels comfortable to contribute if they desire. Here are some tips to help you prepare to meet the challenges of handling a diverse group of participants.

Dialogues on topics like natural disaster and catastrophes and their aftermath often bring forth conflicting views based on religion and politics. Grief, anger, anxiety, and fear are natural human responses in times of crisis and how we think and feel about events depends on our values, religious views, and politics. Some will be angry about civil preparedness and relief efforts and assign blame. Some may feel the disaster was God’s will. There may be participants directly impacted with life altering losses and others who evacuated or escaped the disaster simply traumatized by the near miss experience. It is the facilitator’s responsibility to be as prepared as possible to handle the range of participant styles and emotions and to know when to change directions. It is also helpful to understand your own feelings first so that you can truly facilitate the discussion without letting issues or participants trigger an emotional response from you.

Following are descriptions of various participant styles:

The Over-Participator or Know-It-All

These people may dominate the discussion and/or try to give advice to other participants. These individuals comment too frequently and tend to dominate the discussion. They tend to comment first on each issue and can sometimes comment again after someone else has offered a comment. You don’t want to discourage their enthusiasm or passion; however, you want to allow for others to be able to comment freely.

Use nonverbal signals such as avoiding direct eye contact, directing questions toward others, and moving away from that person and toward someone else who has not contributed.

The Needy

These people have more concerns than can be accommodated in the time permitted. Their needs may be too extensive or complicated, or they may just seem in desperate need of more help.


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Tips for Facilitating Discussions, continued

While empathizing and addressing the concerns that you can, you may need to gently remind the person that you have limited time to cover all of the material and allow for others to share their stories and questions.

The Rambler

These individuals have a need to be heard and are unaware that they repeat their points. They also have a tendency to digress from the main content points being discussed. They can be very passionate about their specific circumstance and can become emotional.

As with the needy, you many need to gently remind the rambler that you have limited time to cover all of the material and allow for others to share their stories and questions.

The Antagonist

These individuals tend to be argumentative or hostile throughout the session. It is important that their behavior or comments don’t diminish others’ willingness or opportunity to be heard. Also, some people can be viewed as hostile by the tone of their voice or body language, but may be very open to the content and to participating in the group.

It is important not to be brought down by the antagonist; use an open tone of voice and body language when commenting to the antagonist. Consider redirecting the comment or question to the larger group so that more people can be involved in keeping the discussion positive.

Following are some sample responses to various types of questions:

Some responses to the Over-Participator:

I appreciate your willingness to share such heartfelt opinions, but I think we need to move on. Who else has observed…?

I’m not sure we can address all your concerns in such a brief period, so why don’t we talk after the session?

Some responses to the Know-It-All, who offers advice you feel is ill-advised:

Another course of action might be…

I’m not sure that I would recommend that course of action…


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If the Know-It-All’s advice is destructive, use stronger language:

I wouldn’t recommend that course of action, but we all have to decide what response works for us. I would suggest…

A response to someone who breaks down emotionally:

Our hearts go out to you. You certainly aren’t alone in being overwhelmed by emotion, and I really appreciate your sharing.

Use solid eye contact and move closer to the person so that he or she feels your concern and interest. Then ask the group for additional comments, or move on to someone else and take the attention off of the emotional person.

Someone asks for advice about his/her child:

What to say and do usually depends on the child. When a parent or teacher asks you “What would you say or do,” you might want to find out more about the child and or respond, What do you think? You don’t have to have the answers. You may want to preface an answer: If it were my child, I’d probably…

Someone asks a question for which you don’t have an answer:

That’s really outside my expertise. You might be able to find more information or get support from resources listed in the What Happened to MY World? book or the handouts.

Someone makes a statement that appears to be intolerant:

When someone makes a challenging or offensive statement, it is a natural response to become defensive. Instead, demonstrate confidence in responding and facilitating the discussion by continuing to use good eye contact, relaxed tone of voice, and body language. If a comment makes you uncomfortable, it is important to appear relaxed before the group, as they are looking to you to manage the discussion.

While it is important that prejudice does not go unchallenged, be careful to couch any response in an understanding tone. Depending on the nature of the statement the participant’s emotional intensity, you also may want to redirect the discussion away from issues related to the politics of diversity.

I understand that you have strong feelings. You may not have intended this, but it seemed to me that your statement stereotyped or scapegoated …

I don’t think we can get into a discussion of these issues in the time we have. I appreciate your willingness to share your views honestly. Let’s leave it that we all have strong feelings about what is intolerance and what is reasonable judgment based on experience.


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Let’s focus on what we want our children to learn and the behavior we want to encourage so that the world of their making will struggle less with ethnic and racial divisions. I think, for the most part, we would agree that we would like them to respect diversity, and to not scapegoat or stereotype others.

When you are concerned the session may be going in a direction that will get out of control or create emotional conflict you are unprepared to handle:

I’d like to pull back here, because I’m concerned that we may not have time (or I don’t feel comfortable or equipped to facilitate this discussion) to give it the depth that it deserves. These are important and complicated issues, and we all feel strongly about them. Let’s focus on how we can help children cope…

Facilitator’s Guide A Question and Response Guide for Facilitators

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A Question and Response Guide

for Facilitators

“Time doesn’t heal all wounds—what heals is proper attention to wounds.”

Below are some of the questions and responses based on the questions from children, parents, and teachers. These will be useful in preparing for questions that could come up in What Happened to MY World? sessions.

My 4-year-old is scared and wants to know about hurricanes and tornados. What do I tell him?

Hurricane and tornados are big storms with lots of rain and really strong winds. Lots of things get knocked down and sometimes everything gets flooded. We will go to a safe place and get away from the storm. We will be safe if it happens again! We can get ready ahead of time to be safe and you will get to help.

My 4- and 7-year-olds are scared of the rain and wind. My 10-year-old and I also get on edge. We are all still having bad dreams.

Being frightened is normal and so are bad dreams. Everyone was scared during the disaster. The wind and rain we experience now remind us of the terrible event and how scary that was and triggers our fears. The best thing to do is to talk about the fears, and how we are planning to be prepared and safe in the future.

How can I help my children feel safe and be safe?

Children who have either experienced a disaster directly or indirectly need reassurance that they will be safe. They have learned that nature is terrifyingly powerful. Now they need to know that no hurricane, flood, tornado, or earthquake has to harm them if they respect nature and are prepared. They need to feel in control and powerful through their own efforts and through those of the competent adults around them. The key to both feeling safe and being safe is to be prepared. The more that even very young children are involved in the process of planning safety efforts, the more they will see natural disasters as a part of life they can manage. Evacuations and fire or tornado drills can become family events, even if they are a little frightening. Have a family meeting and prepare a family plan. Part of the family plan should include a safety kit, including a safety/fun kit for each child that the child helps plan and pack. Make a “helping plan” to help others if another disaster strikes.

A 14-year-old said to me: “My mom is really sad and not herself. Sometimes I think it is my fault.” What can I tell him?

Tell him even if he is not the perfect kid in the time of crisis, it is not his fault! Crisis is hard on everyone and it is normal to get sad or angry or to not feel well. It is also normal to sometimes not behave the way we would like toward those we love.


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A Question and Response Guide, continued

Sometimes parents get mad at kids and kids get mad at parents, or we get very sad. When it’s a bad time for your Mom, try to be helpful and not get in her way. She has a lot on her mind and, like you, is feeling sad and trying to figure out what to do. She will get better and will keep you safe.

How can I help my children feel better about the loss of a ______ (relative, friend, pet)?

Have the child remember all the good things about____. “Draw some pictures, tell some stories and let yourself cry. If your ____ is separated from you or missing, don’t give up hope that everything will work out. Remember that _____ loved you and you will always have special memories of your time together. It’s OK to still talk to ____ or act out what you would say if ____ were still here”.

What do I tell my kids about death?

For every age, the answer is a developmentally appropriate version of “Everything that is alive dies sometime”. Death is a part of life. Also, “Sometimes bad things happen to good people.” Before any answer you give, ask “What are you thinking and feeling?” Children under three years old experience the death of a loved one as an unsettling absence or the presence of sadness or emotional turmoil around them. They simply need our presence, warmth, and strength. To preschool children, death is another mysterious part of life. If someone who cares for them dies, they often feel abandoned. Because young children believe the world revolves around them, they may feel that a death was something that they caused. They need reassurance that the person’s absence is not the result of their actions or feelings. Older children understand that death is permanent and share our struggle with coming to terms with the “why” of it, “why now,” and “how will we carry on and get over it.” They are also often fascinated with the cause and the details of the death and its aftermath. They understand death as a physical experience and often are concerned about the body, as many preschool-aged children would be as well: “What happened to it? What will happen to it now?”

What will happen to all the people who suffered from the hurricanes?

We hope that most people will get help so that their future will look brighter. Many will find out that their fears did not come true – that the people, places or pets they cared about were not harmed, and they were reunited with most of what they had thought they lost. Others who did lose a lot will find, over time, that their sadness and hurt will be reduced. They will miss what they lost but will remember the good times with the people, places or pets that will live on in their memories. They will find hope for a better life.

I am working with homeless children. How can I help them?

When children lose their home, they lose friends, routines, rituals, and maybe their school. The whole architecture of their life has collapsed. Children usually have a parent, but a parent in distress, who may be tired from heroic efforts to just make it


Page 38


to the present, or who may be sad or depressed. And when they find shelter, they usually have lost even more: the ability to sleep easily, to keep clean, to get a snack or pocket money, and to move around freely without the constant presence of an adult. They are usually living in crowded conditions, uncertainty and fear, few places to play or do homework, no private space to pause and be off the beaten path. It’s hard to keep clean and look good. And older children may have found a social stigma leading to a sense of embarrassment, shame, or anger.

They need our understanding, our tolerance, but also our expectations that they will survive and thrive; they can be responsible and helpful.

Disaster changes us (and our children) in many ways. We are very glad to be alive and safe. But we are the same people in the aftermath. We are still shy or modest, or very private, or picky eaters, or sensitive to noise or smell, or all the ways we are quirky when we are at home. Kids still care about being clean or popular. Kids still want to have the right school supplies and all the things that “normal” kids have. Living in groups of strangers or as guests in the homes of others is difficult.

But helping homeless children begins with going beyond a focus on their loss and current needs to recognizing their strengths. Don’t forget what they do have: family, and the human potential for hopes and dreams. They may have families that have survived to this point by small and large acts of courage and determination; families with deep religious faith; or families held together by a strong sense of obligation and love.

Children also have the capacity to survive terrible circumstances. They are living the only life they know. Much more than adults, most children have a resilience and ability to adapt and they are able to orient themselves to new circumstances.

After Katrina, my children have a lot of questions about why there were so many poor people and why so many of them were black.

Children should know that poor people in the United States (and the world) come in all colors and ages, but children and old people make up the highest percentage. There are children and families all over the world who don’t have enough to eat or a place to live. Most poor people are hard working but have very low wages and they don’t come from families with money in the bank. Some people live in areas where there are few jobs and the land or climate makes farming difficult. In some places in the world, and even in parts of America, almost everyone is poor. For most poor people and all poor children, it is not their fault that they are poor.

African Americans make up a large share of the population in Louisiana (and more than 70% of the populations of New Orleans), Mississippi, and other southern states. Many African Americans in those states are poor. Many of the people who couldn’t get out of New Orleans and suffered the most were African American. Only one in four owned a car. Their faces were on television more than the hundreds of thousand of others (white and black) who were able to get out.


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Why are lots of other poor people and disaster victims I see on television dark-skinned?

Many children are used to pictures of people of color suffering. The Asian tsunami happened to strike many coastal areas where many of the people had dark skin. There are also many pictures in the media of very poor people in Africa who are suffering from weather (draught, flooding), violence, or disease.

Skin color is not an accurate measure of poverty but it is most often the way poor people are portrayed. White farmers struggling to keep their farms afloat or poverty- level white wage-earners are generally not portrayed in the media but do exist in reality. Unfortunately, poverty is color blind but it’s not always shown that way on TV.

There are also lots of dark-skinned people who are not poor, and not just celebrities like Oprah, or professional athletes, or music stars. Teachers, lawyers, doctors, business people, and all kinds of workers come in all colors, too.

The TV talked a lot about looters and gangs of men with guns after the Katrina floods. Why do people steal after the storm or flood?

The reports on TV turned out to be very exaggerated. But, every community has a very small number of bad people who do bad things even during a horrible catastrophe when people are suffering. But some others who are not bad might get called criminals or looters even though they are just trying to find food, water, and clothing to survive. During hurricanes and other disasters, many more people of all colors and incomes are generous, brave, and help each other to survive (more than the tiny few who act badly); however we usually don’t see it on our televisions. Most people who survived Hurricane Katrina and the Asian tsunami were heroes and helpers to each other.

What do I tell children about prejudice? Why do people say and do bad things about other people that they don’t even know?

Prejudice is having negative feelings or ideas about a whole group of people without really knowing or understanding very much about them. It is usually based on ignorance (not knowing), fear (they could hurt me or take things I have), hate (I don‘t like things about them), and sometimes our own insecurity (it makes me feel better to think I am better than them).

Are there times when someone teased you about your clothes, or your hair, or for just being a girl or a boy, or for having a different skin color? Or maybe you were teased because you had different abilities and you couldn’t do something. Or other children wouldn’t let you play with them? Imagine feeling like that a lot of the time just because of the color of your skin?


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There are people everywhere who are treated differently because they look or sound different, or have different abilities. But no one should be made to feel badly just because they look different.

What do I tell children about racism and why it happens?

Racism is treating another group of people badly because they look and act differently from you. Sometimes it is the whole community, city, state, or country that treats a group badly. In the United States, because of a long history of slavery, segregation, and racism toward African-Americans, we associate most racism with the attitudes and practices of white society toward people of African heritage who have brown or black skin. There has also been racism towards people from Central and South America with brown skin, Native Americans, Asians, and people with dark skin from the Mediterranean region and Middle East. Racism also happens towards other groups around the world.

People also suffer from prejudice for reasons other than race. Sometimes religion or ethnicity is used to discriminate against people. Jewish people have had a long history of experiencing discrimination in many countries. In the United States, Irish-Americans and Italian-Americans were treated badly 100 years ago, at least in part because they were Catholic. There are prejudiced and bigoted people in every social group who act badly toward people different than themselves.

There are many groups of people that are working to end prejudice and racism. They listen to people about their feelings, try to help others see that treating others badly is wrong, and make laws to stop people from treating others badly.

Do you have any ideas how we can end racism?

How can people go on when they lose so much?

People are amazing! Each of us has inside of us a strong spirit to keep going on with our life, even when terrible things happen. Sometimes that spirit is hard to find when we are sad or hurting or have almost nothing. People need other people to help them find the spirit. Family, friends, and other people like you and I can try and help those who are in need and hurting.

Have you every felt so terrible that you wanted to just stop? What would you do if you lost your house?

Facilitator’s Guide Key Points at a Glance

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Key Points at a Glance Time Segment Description Key Points

5 minutes


The facilitator greets participants as they arrive. The facilitator then introduces him/herself and any supporting facilitators. The facilitator establishes why we are here. Finally the facilitator uses the pre-made flipcharts or overheads to show the session outline.

Introduction: Name Professional/personal

experience Educational background Current work as it relates to

topic Establish personal

connection Why are we here? Share feelings, questions,

insights Discuss how to respond to

children’s reactions and questions

Share some resources for additional support

25 minutes


The facilitator will facilitate a discussion through brief presentation and dialogue techniques utilizing pre-made flipcharts or overheads (optional) to clarify children’s reactions to the crisis, typical behaviors, strategies for handling children’s questions, tolerance and taking care of yourself. The facilitator will point out children’s behaviors that are cause for concern.

Session outline Pillars of Security “Normal” reactions in the

aftermath of a natural disaster or crisis

Strategies for dealing with children’s reactions and questions

Ways to determine when behaviors are cause for concern and may require additional support

Promoting resiliency for others

Taking care of yourself Open forum for sharing

feelings, questions and insights


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Key Points at a Glance, continued

Time Segment Description Key Points

Helping Children Cope: Pillars of Security

To provide parents and caregivers with pertinent information about what forms the basis of a child’s (or adult’s) security: people, place, routine, and ritual.

People Place Routine Ritual

Common Emotional Reactions To Crisis – Adults And Older Children

Shock Confusion Fear Sadness Anger Guilt or shame Helplessness Anxiety/Worry Alienation and isolation

Common Changes In Behavior – Adults And Older Children

Increased or decreased appetite Altered sleeping patterns Fatigue Confusion/indecision Anxious behavior Crying Short temper Headaches and other minor

ailments such as stomachaches Withdrawal

Common Behavioral Reactions by Age Group

For Children Under 3

They know something is up, and can only express themselves through behaviors and may: Be contrary Cling to a parent Cry more than usual


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Common Behavioral Reactions by Age Group, continued

For Preschool Children

Often fear abandonment. May want to be powerful and play to act powerful. May react by: Playing out current events by

portraying heroes, villains, and/or violence. Children use play to try to make sense of the world.

Regress to a younger behavior: previously potty-trained children may have accidents or wet the bed

Have nightmares, difficulty sleeping and want to sleep with parents

Express fears (of stormy weather, the dark, water and of you leaving)

Become clingy and afraid of being left alone

Get into power struggles, become negative

Want to help Elementary-school-

age children

They know more than you think and want to know more. They may: Express curiosity about the details,

including morbid details Become clingy and whiny Show aggressive behavior at home

and/or school Show loss of interest and poor

concentration in school Develop headaches and/or other

physical ailments Seem indifferent


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Common Behavioral Reactions by Age Group, continued

Children in junior high or high school

They know more than you think, want to know more but not always from you. May or may not want to share.

They may: Experience appetite and sleep

disturbance Show increase or decrease in

energy level Show indifference Refuse to be cooperative Experience minor physical

aliments Withdraw and become isolated Worry about their future

Introduce strategies for helping children cope with emotions that follow a crisis.

Let children know they are safe Ask what they know Be honest Give age-appropriate, factual

information Listen, listen, listen Minimize TV, radio, etc. Keep established routines Allow for play time Provide safe environment for

acting out Help children get involved

Behaviors That Are Cause for Concern

Serious, continuous changes in behavior not typical of child

Continued acting out or withdrawal

Nightmares every night


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Time Segment Description Key Points Strategies

For Helping Children Cope, continued

Key points about children experiencing trauma

Children experiencing extreme losses will have symptoms until life stabilizes

Symptoms for children who observed the disaster or were evacuated usually disappear as they get used to a “new normal”

Not sleeping is normal; having frequent nightmares or throwing up every night is not normal

Watch for behaviors that prevent children from living their lives, particularly acting out or withdrawal.

Answering Children’s Questions

Be strong; offer reassurance Think about how you come across Ask children what they mean by

the words they are using, e.g., death, looting, hurricane, flood, and what feelings they are having

Recognize clues in play, art, speech Older children begin to understand Protect children’s idealism Be alert for racism and

stereotyping Be alert to opportunities for

steering children towards helping others actively

Practice Exercise Answering Children’s Questions

Photocopy list of sample questions from the handouts section of this guide.

Split group into pairs or triads, distribute sample questions to the groups and have them practice.

Process around reinforcing the key principles.


Page 46




For Teachers Help children learn about the natural world

Provide books ,pictures, music, films, food, art, excursions to learn more about nature, natural disasters, poverty, respect for others, conflict, and overcoming fear and adversity.

Provide materials that encourage children’s play and expression of their feelings and thoughts.

Growing Good People

Value and respect individual children and try to eliminate stressful situations when necessary.

Research and respect differences in identity, culture, economic differences, and beliefs.


Encourage empathy by encouraging the safe and respectful discussion of feelings of hurt, fear, loss, and doubt.

Help children Try to find hope, goodness, and courage in every tragedy. Help children take humanitarian action, and take action with them.

Work with families as partners.


Page 47




Taking Care of Yourself

Follow routines and rituals that nourish your needs and spirit.

Live well: eat right, get exercise, sleep, and drink plenty of water.

Minimize alcohol intake. Take breaks from the news and

headlines. Talk about your feelings with

other adults. Give yourself some slack for

behavior under stress. Take time to do something fun. Don't let your child be your

caretaker. Feel your feelings; observe

yourself without judgment; cry. Avoid negative people who bring

you down. 25 to 55 minutes (can go longer if needed)

Open Forum

Provide an open forum for participants to ask questions, share stories and provide comments about how they ant their children are coping during these turbulent times.

What questions do you have? What stories would you like to

share?


Page 48


Time Segment Description Key Points 5 minutes

Closing and Evaluation

Review the session objectives and convey a sense of hope to participants. The facilitator will refer to the What Happened to MY World? Book as a resource. Close reintroducing the co-facilitators for further questions and be available for comments.

Share a story of courage or kindness

Convey a sense of hope Thank participants for their

participation Distribute participant training

evaluation Indicate you will be available

following the session to address additional concerns and questions [This time not factored into the training schedule.]

Facilitator’s Guide Handout

What Happened to MY World? Facilitator’s Guide [email protected] Page 49

What Happened to MY World? “Anything that is human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be

more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they can become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people that we trust with that

important talk can help us know that we are not alone.”

Fred Rogers (Life’s Journey’s According to Mister Rogers: Things to Remember Along the Way)

In the fall of 2005, Hurricane Katrina, followed by Hurricane Rita, shattered much more than emotional security by wreaking death and destruction throughout the Gulf Coast region. Together the hurricanes literally blew away the finely woven fabric of people’s lives: their homes, their families, their jobs, their pets, and all the possessions that connect them to the past. Hurricanes Katrina and Rita, like the Asian Tsunami a year earlier, left hundreds of thousands of people uprooted and homeless, adrift in a devastated world.

Extraordinary events like Katrina test us all as citizens and human beings sharing a planet. Children learn from what we say and don’t say about the world and their place in it, as well as from our actions. Children grow into the kind of people they will become at least in part by how we guide them though their questions, concerns and fears, and whether we use the teachable moments thrust upon us to guide and teach the children we care for.

“I came from the weather. The weather was bad.”

Jared, age 5

Jared, like hundreds of thousands of other children, fled Hurricane Katrina. Children like Jared left homes, pets, and predictable lives when their world was suddenly washed away. And like four year old Emily, a September 11 survivor who looked out at the World Trade Center rubble and asked “What happened to the world?” Jared and everyone else touched by catastrophe were thinking the same things:

Will I be OK?

Will you be OK?

Will everyone I love be OK?

Will the world that I know be OK?

Hurricanes and floods happen every year, but the scale of Katrina was very different in size and damage, in lives lost and thrown into chaos, and in the inability at all levels to respond effectively to avoid ongoing catastrophic results. The emotional shock went far beyond the areas in Katrina’s path. The vast ruin, the images of



What Happened to MY World?, continued

desperate people on rooftops or makeshift boats, the reports of hunger, thirst, and violence that went on for days, and the bodies floating by or left unattended on the street – how could this be America? So destructive was Katrina that when Rita struck two weeks later and another million people were evacuated and a hundred thousand homes were lost—a significant disaster in its own right—there was widespread relief it wasn’t worse.

Life is not fair.

Natural disasters and other large-scale tragedies touch many people, but not equally or in the same way. Hundreds of thousands of children experienced the force and damage of the hurricanes directly. Many more were touched through the lives of people they knew. And since we live in a 24-hour pounding news culture where dramatic images of horror or grief surround us constantly, millions more children watched the dramatic images on television thinking, “That could have been me or my friend or relative or someone I love.” Others thought, “Why them and not us?” When Hurricane Rita followed on Katrina’s heels and the fear of further natural disasters continued, growing with every report on the impact of global warming and the effects of society’s impact on the coastlines and flood planes, many could say, “That could be me or someone I love – next time.”

Many children who have experienced other hurricanes, floods, tornados, earthquakes, or fires sometime in their past may have been shaken again by the hurricanes. And there are many others already living with personal trauma or overwhelming stress that are especially vulnerable to witnessing new tragedy from near or afar. There are also children and adults whose natural empathy and high sensitivity to tragedy and trauma leave them particularly exposed to pain in times when fear and heartbreak are ever present.

What happened to the world? It has become a place where we need to support each other and our children as events unfold. When a child experiences a world-altering event, we are the ones called upon to provide comfort and security and to help them make some sense of what has happened.



Pillars of Security

We feel secure when the world is safe, predictable, and manageable. We know we can fit into that world as ourselves and will be accepted by the people we encounter. We can relax when we are with people we trust, and we know what to expect or have confidence that our life experience gives us the skills to cope with whatever will come our way. This is often the exact opposite of how we feel in a crisis situation.

Young children have little life experience and are developing their minds and bodies at such a rate that they are literally new people with each sunrise, each day, each new place, each old place brings surprises. As we grow up and experience more of the world, good and bad, our life experience gives us more of a base, but we depend on four pillars of security to help us face life’s struggle: people, place, routine, and ritual:

People: The most insecure feeling of all is feeling alone—no hand to hold, no one to look up to, no one to warn us, and no arms to hold us when we stumble. Security comes from familiar, trusted, loved ones who know and understand us, and who we know and understand. When these people are behaving unpredictably (as often happens in crisis), or worse, we have no one and are surrounded by strangers, a sense of security is hard to come by.

Place: In our homes, we can relax. We take comfort in the familiar order, the sounds, sights, and smells. We know our way around and how things work. There are few surprises. Our treasured things and our memories are there to reassure us. In our places, we have the freedom to find or create sanctuaries and places to pause in an unfamiliar place; we need to be alert and may have no place of our own.

Routine: Routines are patterns of actions and expectations. The familiar order of the day and the tasks that we do protect us from the fear of the unknown. Routine reassures each of us and stabilizes groups—the regular meal, the prompt dry diaper, the inevitability of sleep.

Ritual: Our individual lives are orderly and meaningful with daily rites that have gained our affection: the first cup of coffee in our favorite cup, goodbye kisses, how we wake up or go to sleep, the routes taken to work or school. Ritual joins routine and the physical order as the bind that holds individuals and groups together in those times of stress and uncertainty.

The four pillars are not equal; certainly people matter the most. But place, routine, and ritual are essential and support the first pillar.

When you are a child (or adult) in a crisis, all four pillars—people, place, routine, ritual—may become shaky or crumble and your world may feel as though it is crashing down upon you – strange people, place, routine, and few rituals. Creating a sense of security requires rebuilding the pillars as best we can.



Children and Stress

Supporting children during times of uncertainty and stress begins with knowing the child. The best indicators of distress in children are changes in behavior not typical for the child. But remember, not all behaviors or behavior changes stem from a crisis. All the other aspects of life and development are marching on: adjusting to a new home, class or school, friends moving away or changing allegiances, parents worried about layoffs, or typical teen concerns about change, friends and dating all create personal stress that may eclipse societal turmoil.

Common Children’s Reactions to Stress:

Bed-wetting

Fear of the dark, monsters, or animals

Clinging

Whining

Nightmares

Toileting accidents, constipation

Loss or increase of appetite

Fear of being left alone; fear of strangers

Confusion/indecision

Testing behavior or refusal to be cooperative

Nail biting or thumb sucking

Irritability

Loss of interest and poor concentration in school

Withdrawal from peers

Regressive behavior (reverting to past behaviors)

Headaches or other physical complaints

Increase or decrease in energy level

Indifference

Depression



Emotional Shock Direct survivors of catastrophic events may go into the same emotional shock that often follows the sudden death of a spouse, parent, or child immediately after the event. They may become seriously dazed and confused. They may exhibit many of the symptoms of trauma for days, weeks, or even longer if the circumstances continue, and some of the symptoms may be severe.

To help survivors get through this period, they need:

1. More than a bed and a roof: victims need calm uncluttered surroundings that convey order and safety

2. To return to a simple, manageable routine instead of generating more change

3. Practical, functional help from people - more than help examining their feelings (help with details as small as finding keys or cleaning up to assistance with insurance and bank accounts)

4. Help mentally digesting new information about what they need to do, who are the new people in their life, where they need to be

5. The stability and reassurance of familiar faces of friends, neighbors, store clerks, and others in their life

6. To avoid replays of their disaster, or any other disturbing events, as they can reawaken impressions of the all-too-recent catastrophe and rekindle their emotional distress

(Adapted from Emotional Recovery After Natural Disasters: How to Get Back to a Normal Life by Ilana Singer)

Note: The plight of families thrust into shelter living or transitional housing is increased because most of what they actually will experience bears little resemblance to the advice above. They may have just a bed, no familiar faces, strange routines, and little support. Under these circumstances, sometimes simple recognition of the causes of the individual’s behavior and acceptance of the effects of emotional shock is all that is possible.



Common Emotional Reactions to Trauma

If you have suddenly lost a loved one, you are in a state of emotional shock and grief. You will have to grieve and then face a new life without the loved one. If you are homeless, you usually arrive at your place of shelter in emotional shock, exhausted, despairing, and disoriented. More important, you don’t need to just to get over a great loss and restore your spirit; you need to construct a life and home for you and your children.

Shock: How could this happen?

Confusion: What does it all mean?

Fear or worry: What will happen next; where, when and to whom? Will it end?

Grief: For someone I loved, or someone else like me, or the person I was, or the life I led before.

Anger: At the people behind the tragedy, the people not helping, and at the cruelty and unfairness of it all.

Guilt: Why them and not me? Could I have done more?

Shame and surprise: It’s not like me to behave this way: angry, bitter, blaming, or scared.

Helplessness: How can I ever make my world OK again?

Sadness: Lives lost or adrift, children orphaned, futures turned to mud?

Isolation or alienation: I’m probably the only person who feels exactly this way, and I am not sure if anyone understands my feelings.

Hopelessness and despair: I’m not sure my efforts are worth it. What does it matter?



Fostering Resiliency

Some children seem to bounce back from terrible circumstances and lead emotionally healthy and productive lives. The caring adult(s) who fosters resiliency nurtures in the child a positive outlook and a sense of personal power, and helps the child gain mastery over his or her environment. In their book Raising Resilient Children, Robert Brooks and Sam Goldstein identified the qualities found in resilient children. Resilient children:

Feel special and appreciated

Set realistic goals and expectations for themselves

Solve problems and meet challenges

Have productive coping strategies that foster growth

Have a sense of their own strengths and weaknesses

Feel strong and competent

Have good interpersonal skills with adults and children

Focus on aspects of life they can control or influence

They also identified the qualities of caregivers who foster resiliency: They

Are empathetic

Listen and communicate

Accept children for who they are and help set realistic goals

Help children feel special and appreciated

Help children experience positive results and feel competent

Help children recognize and learn from mistakes

Develop responsibility, compassion, and a social conscience by providing opportunities to contribute

Teach how to solve problems and make decisions

Use discipline and guidance that promotes self-discipline and self-worth

Change “negative scripts” (thought and behavioral patterns)

To plant or foster the seeds of resiliency, find and support the adults who can play the role of mentor, cheerleader, and guide to the child.



Helping Children Cope with Stress: A Quick Summary

1. Be available. 2. Provide a peaceful household. 3. Listen, listen, and listen some more. 4. Be honest and answer their questions – at their level. 5. Respect differences in children – individual and age-based. 6. Encourage consistency, everyday routines, and favorite rituals. 7. Make the environment safe for talking about feelings and thoughts. 8. Expect and allow for all kinds of emotion. 9. Give choices and be flexible – avoid power struggles. 10. Allow a lot of opportunities and different media for expression. 11. Encourage activity and play. 12. Support the child’s friendships and social network. 13. Be the best model you can as a human being. 14. Hug and cuddle with permission. 15. Practice patience and acceptance. 16. Support children – at their worst. 17. Expect behavior that is typical of a younger child. 18. Expect behavior that is beyond the child’s years. 19. Try to live right – eat rest, sleep, be active at something you enjoy. 20. Make bedtime special. 21. Resist overprotection. 22. Don’t force talk and interaction. 23. Understand that playing is a way to cope, grieve and sort through fears and confusion. 24. Attend to the physical symptoms. 25. Reassure the child that he or she is not alone. 26. Set limits on acceptable behavior, and enforce them. 27. Remember triggers that will cause distress. 28. Plan family time together. 29. Be available for help if needed. 30. Take care of yourself.

*This list was adapted from 35 Ways to Help a Grieving Child (The Dougy Center).



Answering Children’s Questions

Before talking to children about difficult issues:

Get your own feelings and thoughts straight, and try to be your most thoughtful, calm self.

Think not only about what you want to say, but also about how you want it to come across through your words, tone, and body language.

Ask children what they think the words that they are using mean (e.g. dead, drown, hurricane, flood, tsunami, looter) and what feelings they are having.

Ask what’s on the child’s mind and follow his or her lead. Recognize the clues in a child’s art, play, or conversations with friends.

Acknowledge feelings. Share your feelings, but always be strong and offer the reassurances you can, even when you are feeling insecure.

With younger children, try to shape the images that will define disaster in the child’s mind.

Respect the growing ability of school-age children and teens to understand issues, and be honest with them.

Stay tuned into the child and make the issues understandable to the child.

Protect your child’s idealism. Exposed to too much of life’s dark side, children can lose their sense of optimism and feeling that life is manageable.

Stay alert to stereotyping, racism and work for understanding and respect for cross-cultural and socio-economic differences.

Be alert for opportunities to steer children toward helping actively, and exercise compassion.



Answering Children’s Questions – Sample Questions

The following questions may be used during a small group exercise to provide participants the opportunity to practice answering children�s questions.

Child age 10 asks “What can I do to help?”

Child age 6 asks “Is nature mad at us?” Older brother, age 8, then says “I think God is telling us something.”

Child age 4 now says every time it rains “I am afraid of the rain.”

Child age 8 asks “Why does everyone who suffered in the storm have black faces?”

Child age 11 says “Why did Grandma get out and those other people stay behind?”

Child age 7 says “You always talk about listening and having good listening ears, why didn’t all the people listen and leave New Orleans?”

Teenager says, “What is a hurricane? If we address global warming, will it really help?”

Child age 9 asks, “Why did some people stay with their house and end up on the roof?”

Child age 6 asks “How do you drown?”



Tolerance: Respect for Others

Children can learn prejudice at a very young age. They can learn to fear differences, stereotype others, and reject others because of identity. They learn this from the adults and children around them and from television, movies, music, and video games. Prejudice leads to scapegoating and discrimination.

Intolerance of others begins with ignorance and fear. Children need to be taught about humanity, human rights, and tolerance in order to combat images and stereotypes from the media and the world around them.

Watch what you say about others and be a model for respect for diversity.

Create a multicultural environment in your home or school, and show that you value diversity. Expose children to other cultures and people through books, media, and personal experiences with friends, coworkers, restaurants, festivals, etc.

Use accurate and fair contemporary images of cultural groups rather than stereotypes. For example, show African Americans and Latinos who are neither poor, nor famous athletes, musicians, nor celebrities.

Listen and answer children’s questions about others with respect, and pay attention to accuracy.

Banish teasing or rejection based on identity: gender, race, ethnicity religion, size, or physical characteristics.

Provide activities and discussion that center on positive identity and appreciating differences among people and cultures.

Help children learn the difference between feeling proud of one’s heritage and feeling superior to others.

Teach children to recognize stereotypes and caricature.

Teach children how to challenge bias about themselves and others.

Take advantage of a child’s understanding of fairness and justice.

Let children know that unjust images can be challenged.

Involve children in taking action to make their community a better and more fair place.

*Adapted from Teaching Young Children to Resist Bias: What Parents Can Do (Sparks, et. al. NAEYC: Washington, D.C.)



Be Prepared for Catastrophe

Have a Family Meeting:

Families need to prepare and make plans for what might happen. Talk about what situations the family needs to be concerned about. Also talk about the rescuers and heroes who are there to help the family if disaster strikes.

Make a Family Plan:

Together create a family plan that covers what the family needs to do to be safe:

Decide what will be done ahead of time to be better prepared, and who to contact (family, friends, work and school contacts).

Develop an emergency contact list of family, friends, schools, doctors, veterinarians, police, fire, and insurance representatives.

Create a Safety Map that includes:

Where to go in the house in the case of disasters where staying in is advisable

Evacuation plans that include where to go in or outside the neighborhood

How and where to check in if the family becomes separated

Develop a Pet Survival Plan that includes scenarios for taking the pet or leaving the pet behind

Identify guardians to take care of children if the parents are no longer able

Take a First Aid class

Make a Family Safety Kit:

Together decide what should go in the kit and where to keep it. The kit may include:

Flashlights and batteries

Lighters and matches

Candles

First Aid kit

Water (at least three gallons per person)

Water purification kit or tablets

Food (some non-perishable)

Sleeping bags or blankets

Radios and batteries or a radio with hand crank power



Be Prepared for Catastrophe, continued

Tarp

Camping supplies (tent, lantern, stove, sleeping bags)

Cash

Medications and any necessary medical equipment

Extra clothing

Empty gasoline cans

Plastic trash bags

Copies of important documents

Photographs of family members and family dogs or cats

Names and numbers of important people: family, friends, doctors, veterinarians, etc.

Pet survival kit with pet food and water, medications, carriers and restraints, pet toys, plastic bags

Keep the kit in the garage or a closet close to the door.

Make an Individual Child “My Own Safety Kit”:

Have children prepare their own bags. With your help, let them decide what goes into the bag (and allow some child logic to prevail). Possible choices:

Flashlights and batteries

Snacks and water

Favorites:

Stuffed animals and toys

Pillow or blanket

Clothes

Books

Photographs

Games

Snacks

Battery-powered radio and batteries

Whistle

Camera



Be Prepared for Catastrophe, continued

Journal

Writing and art supplies

Have Practice Drills

Practice what to do in the event of the possible natural disaster or fire. Assign roles for each of the children, preschool-age and up. While this might sound scary to you, it will provide comfort and security to children by empowering them with skills and knowledge.

Make a Helping Plan

Children (and adults) will feel stronger if they not only feel that they will be safe, but can also help others be safe during or after the crisis. Perhaps pack extra food, water, and supplies for others.



What Teachers Can Do

While parents should use children’s questions and statements as “learnable moments” to impart their moral and religious thinking and values about basic issues, generally teachers should help children with anxiety, confusion, or interest without expressing their own religious or political views.

Provide learning opportunities:

Expand children’s knowledge of the natural world through projects and experiments that involve growing things, measuring and tracking rain, snow, the speed of wind, or temperature.

Provide pictures, music, films, food, art, excursions, and visitors to learn more about nature.

Provide books at the appropriate level that address the issues of natural disasters, poverty, respect for others, conflict, overcoming fear and adversity.

Ensure that the curriculum includes children’s current interests and concerns.

Help children cope and succeed:

Provide materials that encourage children’s play and expression of their feelings and thoughts. Children need to work through issues, so allow fantasy play or art as long as it does not hurt others.

Value and respect individual children, and try to eliminate stressful situations when necessary (new transitions, unnecessary challenges).

Encourage an active, democratic process:

Sustain or create a democratic group in the classroom with participatory decision-making. Make the group safe for discussion of conflicting ideas.

Create opportunities for cooperation: projects, chores, decision-making.

Grow good people:

Honor differences and go beyond acceptance and tolerance. Research and respect differences in identity, culture, economic differences, and beliefs.


Encourage empathy by encouraging the safe and respectful discussion of feelings of hurt, fear, loss, and doubt (without forcing participation).

Become sensitive to hurtful language and teach children to be alert to it.



What Teachers Can Do, continued

Try to find hope, goodness, and courage in every tragedy. Help children to see caring, courage, tolerance, and compassion in them.

Grow good citizens:

Help children take action, and take action with them: write letters, send pictures, raise money, and connect with others.

Take humanitarian action. International and national relief efforts always need support. Involve children in local and global humanitarian efforts.

Work with families:

Treat families as partners. Keep parents and family members informed and involve them in your efforts.



Selected Resources

For an updated and complete list of resources and more information on helping children cope with tragedy, visit www.brighthorizons.com.

On Disasters and Relief

Web Sites

www.apa.org/pi/pii/care.html The American Psychological Association offers resources and tips for coping after Hurricane Katrina in English and Spanish.

www.ed.gov/news/hurricane/index.html The U.S. Department of Education “Hurricane Help for Schools” website serves as a nationwide clearinghouse to address the needs of affected schools.

www.familyinfoserv.com/pdf/anniestories.pdf A guided self study for parents and educators to help children cope with the feelings caused by floods and other disasters.

www.mercycorps.org An international relief and development organization whose website provides information on programs all over the world and shows how to get help, give help, share grief, and help children cope.

www.nasponline.org/NEAT/Katrinaparents Advice for parents from the National Association of School Psychologists.

www.networkforgood.org The Network for Good website lists and explains the missions of organizations that are supporting victims of Hurricane Katrina.

www.redcross.org The American Red Cross provides emergency relief and immediate response to disasters. The website includes a wealth of suggested materials for children and teachers regarding disasters, and avenues for volunteerism or assistance.

www.nmha.org/reassurance/hurricane/children.cfm The National Mental Health Association addresses all aspects of mental health and illness with extensive information and resources to support victims of Hurricane Katrina.

www.smhp.psych.ucla.edu The University of California Mental Health Project offers broad information regarding catastrophe, tragedy, trauma, and emergencies with extensive information on the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Updated daily.

http://www.brighthorizons.com/

http://www.apa.org/pi/pii/care.html

http://www.ed.gov/news/hurricane/index.html

http://www.familyinfoserv.com/pdf/anniestories.pdf

http://www.mercycorps.org/

http://www.nasponline.org/NEAT/Katrina_parents

http://www.networkforgood.org/

http://www.redcross.org/

http://www.nmha.org/reassurance/hurricane/children.cfm

http://www.smhp.psych.ucla.edu/



Selected Resources, continued

Children’s Websites

www.jmu.edu/psychologydept/4kids.htm Interactive disaster information that educates young children about floods and coping with their feelings if they are the victims of a flood disaster. Ages 4-8

www.mindohfoundation.org/hurricanekatrina.htm MindOH! Foundation offers thought provoking, Hurricane Katrina-related lesson plans. Ages 6-12

www.connectforkids.org Connect for Kids provides online resources for helping people affected by Hurricane Katrina. “Emergency Guidelines for Helping Victims; Giving and Getting Help” – practical information on food drives, medical services, clothing, school supplies, and foundations collecting donations. “Help with Healing” – valuable resources for helping kids cope with trauma, explaining tragedies to children and supporting their physical and emotional needs.

Books for Adults

Emotional Recovery After Natural Disasters: How to Get Back to Normal Life (An Idyll Arbor Personal Health Book), Ilana Singer. Practical information for victims of natural disasters and the people who work with them.

Children’s Books

I Know What to Do: A Kid's Guide to Natural Disasters, Bonnie S. Mark, Aviva Layton and Michael Chesworth. Facts about disasters and information on how to prepare for and survive a disaster. Age 6 and up

The Flood That Came to Grandma's House, L. Stallone. Illustrates one family’s ordeal when a home becomes flooded with water. Ages 4-8

The Magic School Bus: Inside a Hurricane (Magic School Bus Series), Joanna Cole and Bruce Degen. Children look inside the eye of a hurricane. Ages 4-8

On Weather

Websites

www.education-world.com A great site for teachers with ideas and classroom activities in response to current events such as natural disasters.

www.miamisci.org/hurricane/hurricane0.html The Miami Museum of Science gives information about hurricanes and shares survivor’s stories written by children. The site includes a teacher's guide.

http://www.jmu.edu/psychologydept/4kids.htm

http://www.mindohfoundation.org/hurricanekatrina.htm

http://www.connectforkids.org/

http://www.education-world.com/

http://www.miamisci.org/hurricane/hurricane0.html




Children’s Websites

www.nws.noaa.gov/om/reachout/kidspage.shtml.org National Weather Service Playtime for Kids offers fun interactive games and basic information designed to help kids learn about hazardous weather. All ages

www.nssl.noaa.gov/edu/bm/bm_main.html Provides Coloring Books for Kids about Weather which helps kids learn about how to keep them safe. Preschool - Age 6

http://scijinks.jpl.nasa.gov/weather/ An interactive website that helps students learns about weather while having fun. Ages 8 and up

Children’s Books

Flash, Crash, Rumble, and Roll, Franklyn Branley. Facts about weather and the causes of storms and a few simple experiments about weather. Grades K-4

Hurricanes and Tornados, Picture Library, Norman Barrett and Franklin Watts. Photographs and simple text show and explain the devastating damage that severe storms can cause. Ages 6-10

Weather: DK Eyewitness Guides, Brian Cosgrove. An informative guide to learn about weather. Ages 4-10

Wild Weather: Hurricanes! Lorraine Jean Hopping and Jody Wheeler. The authors explain the causes and effects of hurricanes. Ages 5-8

On Children and Stress

Websites

www.nctsnet.org The website for the National Child Traumatic Stress Network contains excellent, easy to locate, important resources for parents, professionals, and the general public regarding Hurricane Katrina and its aftermath. Many articles are available in English and Spanish.

www.preparerespondrecover.com/childrensneeds Prepare, Respond, Recover is an organization that provides safety planning, response, and recovery support to individuals and small businesses.

www.nmha.org/reassurance/hurricane/children.cfm The National Mental Health Association addresses all aspects of mental health and illness with extensive information and resources to support victims of Hurricane Katrina.

http://www.nws.noaa.gov/om/reachout/kidspage.shtml.org

http://www.nssl.noaa.gov/edu/bm/bm_main.html

http://scijinks.jpl.nasa.gov/weather/

http://www.nctsnet.org/

http://www.preparerespondrecover.com/childrensneeds

http://www.nmha.org/reassurance/hurricane/children.cfm




www.smhp.psych.ucla.edu The University of California Mental Health Project,

offers broad information regarding catastrophe, tragedy, trauma, and emergencies with extensive information on the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Updated daily.

On Grief and Loss

Websites

www.dougy.org The Dougy Center, the National Center for Grieving Children and Families, provides support and training nationally and internationally to individuals and organizations seeking to assist children in grief.

www.griefnet.org GriefNet.org is an Internet community of professionals dealing with grief, death, and major loss. The website contains an extensive list of grief-related topics.

Books for Adults

Parenting through Crisis: Helping Kids in Times of Loss, Grief and Change, Barbara Coloroso. Suggestions to help parents support children through difficult times.

Children’s Books

I'll Always Love You, Hans Wilhelm. A moving story about a boy loving his dog. Ages 3-7

I Miss You: A First Look at Death, Pat Thomas. A book that invites children to tell how they are feeling. Ages 4-7

I Wish I Could Hold Your Hand… A Child's Guide to Grief and Loss. Pat Palmer. A comforting book that helps grieving children identify, accept, and cope with their feelings. Ages 9-12

Lifetimes, Michael Mellonie. A beautiful book to help children see death is a part of life. Ages 4-8

So Much to Think About, When Someone You Care About Has Died, Fred Rogers. This is an excellent activity book to help children and adults work out their feelings together. Ages 3-7

Tear Soup, Pat Schweibert. A richly-illustrated story about a woman who cooks up a special batch of “tear soup” after suffering a terrible loss. Ages 4-8

The Accident, Carol Carrick. Christopher must deal with his feelings of depression and guilt after his dog is hit by a truck and killed. A real and honest look at grief. Ages 4-8

http://www.smhp.psych.ucla.edu/

http://www.dougy.org/

http://www.griefnet.org/




The Fall of Freddie the Leaf: A Story of Life for All Ages, Leo Buscaglia, Ph.D. The author touches children and adults alike, illustrating the delicate balance between life and death. Ages 4-8

The Tenth Good Thing about Barney, Judith Viorst. After the death of his cat, a small boy (with his father’s help) begins to develop an understanding of the cycle of life and how to cope with loss. Ages 4-8

On Homelessness

Web Sites

www.copaa.org/news/hurricane.html “Education Rights of Displaced and Homeless Children,” a summary of basic legal information about the rights of students with disabilities affected by Hurricane Katrina.

http://facstaff.uww.edu/homewords/parentinhomeless.html Resources and information on the impact of homelessness on children and families. It includes techniques for helping parents support (and cope with) their children and handouts that can be used in working with parents who are homeless.

www.homesforthehomeless.com The Institute for Children and Poverty evaluates strategies and offers innovative approaches to combat the effects of homelessness.

www.horizonsinitiative.org Horizons for Homeless Children is a Massachusetts- based organization that works to improve the lives of homeless children and their families.

www.naehcy.org/katrina.html National Association for the Education of Homeless Children and Youth serves as the voice for the education of homeless children, connecting educators, parents, advocates, and service providers to ensure school success.

Children’s Books

Changing Places: A Kid’s View of Shelter Living, Margie Chalofsky, Glen Finland, Judy Wallace, Ingrid Klass (Illustrator). A poignant view of shelter life for children. Ages 6-13

Cooper’s Tale, Ralph Da Costa Nunez, Madeline Simon (Illustrator). Cooper the mouse becomes homeless and develops a friendship with three homeless children that change all their lives. Preschool

Lives Turned Upside Down, J. Hubbard. Homeless children document their lives through photographs. Grades 2 and up

http://www.copaa.org/news/hurricane.html

http://facstaff.uww.edu/homewords/parentinhomeless.html

http://www.homesforthehomeless.com/

http://www.horizonsinitiative.org/

http://www.naehcy.org/katrina.html




On Tolerance and Bias

Websites

www.adl.org Early Childhood Resources, Miller Early Childhood Initiative of A World of Difference Institute, Bias Free Foundations Training on how to stop hate before it starts and learn to teach the value of “difference.” A World of Difference website that offers a comprehensive annotated bibliography of multi-cultural and anti bias books for children.

www.tolerance.org Tolerance.org is a Web project of the Southern Poverty Law Center, a nonprofit civil rights organization that promotes tolerance and diversity and combats hate and discrimination through education, inquiry, and litigation. Site features sections for teachers, parents, teens, and elementary age children.

Books for Adults

Early Childhood Resources, Miller Early Childhood Initiative of A World of Difference Institute Bias Free Foundations

Early Childhood Activities for Families, Miller Early Childhood Initiative of A World of Difference Institute Bias Free Foundations

Close the Book on Hate: 101 Ways to Combat Prejudice, ADL and Barnes & Nobel, NY, 2000.

What to Tell Your Child About Prejudice and Discrimination (pamphlet)

Hate Hurts: How Children Learn and Unlearn Prejudice, ADL, Caryl Stern-LaRosa, and Ellen Hofheimer Bettmann. NY, Scholastic, 2000.

www.adl.org

http://www.tolerance.org/

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Ch

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know

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natu

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orld

th

roug

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xper

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at in

volv

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ondi

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rovi

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ooks

,pic

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s, fo

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excu

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expr

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f the

ir fe

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ough

ts.

Slid

e 10

Wh

at H

app

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to

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rld

? F

acili

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brig

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rizon

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an D

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win

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oo

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alue

and

res

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indi

vidu

al c

hild

ren,

and

try

to e

limin

ate

stre

ssfu

l si

tuat

ions

whe

n ne

cess

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•R

esea

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and

resp

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s in

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, eco

nom

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diffe

renc

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fs.

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otic

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y, u

nfai

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s, a

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just

ice

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aily

life

and

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new

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call

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ncou

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safe

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disc

ussi

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f fee

lings

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s, a

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elp

child

ren

Try

to fi

nd h

ope,

goo

dnes

s, a

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oura

ge in

eve

ry

trag

edy.

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elp

child

ren

take

hum

anita

rian

actio

n, a

nd ta

ke a

ctio

n w

ith th

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ork

with

fam

ilies

as

part

ners

.

Slid

e 11

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at H

app

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to

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rld

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Car

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f Y

ou

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ollo

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outin

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itual

s th

at n

ouris

h yo

ur n

eeds

and

spi

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ve w

ell:

eat r

ight

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exe

rcis

e, s

leep

, and

drin

k pl

enty

of w

ater

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inim

ize

alco

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ntak

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ake

brea

ks fr

om th

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ws

and

head

lines

.

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alk

abou

t you

r fe

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gs w

ith o

ther

adu

lts.

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ive

your

self

som

e sl

ack

for

beha

vior

und

er s

tres

s.

•T

ake

time

to d

o so

met

hing

fun.

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on't

let y

our

child

be

your

car

etak

er.

•F

eel y

our

feel

ings

; obs

erve

you

rsel

f with

out j

udgm

ent;

cry.

•A

void

neg

ativ

e pe

ople

who

brin

g yo

u do

wn.

Author Jim Greenman is Senior Vice President for Education and Program Development at Bright Horizons Family Solutions, the world’s leading provider of employer-sponsored early care and education. He is the author of What Happened to the World: Helping Children Cope with Turbulent Times and numerous other books and articles.

Bright Horizons Family Solutions

Bright Horizons Family Solutions is the world’s leading provider of employer-sponsored child care, early education, and work/life solutions, caring for more than 62,000 children in more than 600 child care, early education, and back-up care centers around the world. We dedicate this book to the thousands of children who were directly affected by Hurricanes Katrina and Rita, suffering traumatic losses of family and homes, and to the millions more who witnessed the disaster from a distance, shaking their sense of security and leaving them wondering whether this kind of tragedy could happen to them or those they love. We also pay tribute to the heroes among us, including Bright Horizons centers and employees in the Gulf Coast region, who offered invaluable support to the victims. For more information, visit www.brighthorizons.com.

JPMorgan Chase

JPMorgan Chase had about 1,100 employees working in the New Orleans area, many of whom lost their homes and belongings when Hurricane Katrina came through in September, 2005. We dedicate this book to our colleagues who are trying to put their lives back together and to all the victims of one of the worst storms in American history. Worldwide, 160,000 colleagues in more than 50 countries embody the spirit of JPMorgan Chase values and work every day to bring the very best to our clients and to our communities. For more information, visit www.jpmorganchase.com.

Mercy Corps

Mercy Corps alleviates suffering, poverty and oppression by helping people build secure, productive and just communities. Since 1979, Mercy Corps has provided more than $1 billion in assistance to people in 81 nations. The organization's 2,100 staff worldwide currently reach 7 million people in more than 35 countries. Mercy Corps allocates more than 92 percent of its resources to programs that assist people in need. For more information, visit www.mercycorps.org.

Comfort for Kids is delivered in partnership with the YWCA.

The What Happened to MY World? Facilitator’s Guide is based on content in What Happened to MY World? Helping Children cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe. It will assist you in facilitating sessions to help parents, professionals, and volunteers working with children develop strategies for supporting children in the aftermath of natural disaster or catastrophe. The session is an opportunity to bring adults together in an open forum, where they can share insights, comments, and questions about the reactions and behaviors they are witnessing in the children for whom they care. Session participants will develop strategies for supporting children in the aftermath of catastrophe.

What Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe is for parents, teachers, and everyone working to help children and families make sense of a world where the forces of nature and man can unleash a fury in which buildings are torn apart, lives are lost, and our sense of safety and security can disappear in a flash. It is designed to help adults peer into the minds of children, from infancy through the teenage years, and understand their fears, their grief, and their struggles to understand why – whether through the acts of nature or human beings -- the ground under their feet can disappear and the world can become a very frightening place. It is to help both those who experience and survive catastrophe first hand, as well as the children who witness from a distance and wonder what it was like or whether they will find themselves in similar circumstances.

The Facilitator’s Guide has a comprehensive, user-friendly format that includes everything you will need to facilitate the session, from facilitation tips and overheads to an easy-to-use, step-by-step outline for the session. It also has a handout section that can be reproduced and distributed to participants during the session, as well as a number of sample questions with sample responses. The Guide is designed to accommodate a broad range of facilitation experience and provides options for various facilitation styles.

Distribution of What Happened to MY World? and the What Happened to MY World? Facilitator’s Guide is conducted entirely on a not for profit basis. Proceeds go to the Bright Horizons Foundation for Children to support projects for Katrina and Rita affected children and families. For more information visit www.brighthorizons.com.

Documents

LeaderGuide Pro Leaderguide Template - Disaster …Happened to MY World? Helping Children Cope with Natural Disaster and Catastrophe. It will assist you in facilitating sessions to