Running Head: LAVERNE COX: “AIN’T I A WOMAN” 1

Laverne Cox: “Ain’t I a Woman”

Kaylee Bialozor

Central Washington University

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Laverne Cox: “Ain’t I a Woman”

On Tuesday, November 18th, 2014, just before 7:00 p.m., a line of Central Washington

University (CWU) students swept from the top floor of the Student Union and Recreation Center

(SURC), across the balcony, down the stairs, under the balcony, and into the entry way. They

gathered this night to watch Laverne Cox speak about her experiences as a transgender woman.

Armed with their tickets, the students flooded the SURC ballroom and filled nearly every

available seat. The crowd hushed as two CWU students emerged to introduce Laverne Cox to the

stage. As Laverne Cox stepped out from behind the curtain and onto the stage, she received a

standing ovation.

Cox began her speech by imparting everyone with her belief about how “justice is what

love looks like in public” (Cox, 2014). She repeated the phrase several more times, being

particular in her enunciation of each word. In addition to this comment, Cox mentioned how, in

college, she became excited over the idea that “one is not born a woman, but becomes one” as

well (Cox, 2014). She began speaking about her background by speaking of her twin brother

who was born 7 minutes apart from her in Mobile, Alabama.

Laverne Cox was bullied quite a bit when she was in school for acting differently, and

when she told her mother, her mother asked what Cox was doing to make them bully her. She

said this as if it was something Cox was doing rather than Cox being herself. As a result, Cox

thought she was wrong for many years because she felt and acted differently than a little boy was

supposed to feel and act. She loved to dance and perform, so she begged her mother to let her

join a dance team. Her mother agreed as long as Cox agreed to not join a ballet team because her

mother considered it to be “too gay” (Cox, 2014).

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Cox had a teacher named Ms. Ridgeway in 3rd grade who once caught Cox fanning

herself with a feathered fan. After this incident, Cox was sent to the principal, and her mother

was called. Ms. Ridgeway told Cox’s mother “your son is going to end up in New Orleans

wearing a dress if we don’t get him into counseling right away” (Cox, 2014). Not only did this

convince Cox’s mother to put Cox into counseling, but it scared Cox as well. Cox saw her

predicted future of dress wearing to be terrifying because everyone around her portrayed it in this

manner. During one of her counseling sessions, Cox’s therapist asked if she knew the difference

between a boy and a girl. In response, Cox simply said “there is no difference” (Cox, 2014).

In 6th grade, Cox’s grandmother passed away. Cox went to church regularly, and,

therefore, believed in heaven and hell. Furthermore, she knew the kinds of thoughts and feelings

she had were considered sins in the eyes of the church. She hated the idea of her grandmother

looking down on her from heaven and hearing all of her sinful thoughts, so she decided to

swallow an entire bottle of pills from the bathroom, lie down, and wait to die. When she awoke

the next morning, with a terrible stomach ache, she awoke with a renewed sense of purpose and

drive. From then on, she decided to be a model student.

Cox worked very hard to achieve exceptional grades, and she kept working at extra

curricular activities as well. One year, she decided she would run for Vice President of the

Student Council. As the opening line for her speech, Cox said “quality is my principle; qualified

is my attitude” (Cox, 2014). Today, she is not quite sure what she meant, but it dazzled the

students to the point where Cox was voted as the VP of the Student Council. She was amazed

how a child people used to pick on for being weird and different had been voted into a prominent

position in school.

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Cox became excelled academically to the point where she was able to attend the Alabama

School of Fine Arts in Birmingham, Alabama. It was during this portion of the speech where

Cox described her brother as a practicing homosexual, punk rock, Negro Goth, free black man.

Each of these terms was given to Cox by her brother to use to describe him. She explained how

pronouns matter when speaking to any person, and you should know which pronouns the person

is comfortable with before you arbitrarily use one. After college, Cox went to New York City,

where she met Tina Sparkles at the NYC nightclub scene.

At the NYC nightclub scene, transgender people are celebrated and allowed into the clubs

ahead of the people waiting in line. This was refreshing for Cox as she had been rejected

everywhere else in her life, and she was finally celebrated. Cox became good friends with Tina

Sparkles and was inspired to have gender reassignment surgery after learning of Tina’s

experiences in her transformation. After Cox began treatments, she would walk down the streets

of Manhattan and get “spooked” by the people walking by. When Cox was “spooked,” other

people around her would yell “that’s a man,” kick her, and call her out in other derogatory ways.

Since she was beginning to look more like a traditional woman, she was confused as to why this

was happening to her.

Eventually, she decided to make herself comfortable with who she is and embrace

everything that was happening to her. When she called her mother to tell her about the gender

reassignment surgery, her mother simply commented on how Cox has “such big hands and feet”

(Cox, 2014). Cox’s mother took time to get used to her daughter’s new image, but once she did,

she started standing up for Cox when she would get “spooked.” After such a long struggle, Cox

had finally found herself in a new life she loved. The last bit of wisdom Cox left the students of

CWU was how people need to “create safe space for people to self identify” (Cox, 2014).

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Cox spoke at great length about the struggle she and all transgender people endure on

their path of self identification. In some parts of her speech, she spoke specifically of the struggle

of black, transgender women and how, in most cases, they have a harder struggle than most of

the rest of the transgender community. Typically, “transgender youth of color may frequently

face significant discrimination and prejudice in the form of transprejudice and racism in the

U.S.” (Singh, 2013, p. 690). This point, focusing on black, transgender women, along with

others, was vehemently expressed and emphasized in Cox’s speech. In many cases, transgender

youth of color “may lack family support” and “may not receive education on issues of gender

and sexuality because of U.S. federal education policies that promote abstinence and lack a queer

or transgender focus on sexuality education” (Singh, 2013, p. 690).

As evidenced by Cox’s speech, she faced many of the issues specific to transgender

people of color, but was able to beat the odds and overcome each piece of adversity. She held

strong even when she came across two men in the street how started arguing about whether she

was male or female and shouting racial slurs. Some women are not so lucky, however. Cox

spoke of a transgender woman who was walking down the street when she was cat called by a

man. Upon realizing the woman was transgender, the man became angry and beat her to death.

There were witnesses, however no one was convicted. This is the reality for many transgender

people.

It is instances such as these that make transgender people prone to suicide. In a 2009

survey “of 7,261 LGBT students (ages 13 through 18), the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education

Network (GLSEN),” researchers found “62.7% of respondents heard negative remarks about

gender expression, 56.7% heard negative remarks about ‘not being masculine enough,’ and

39.7% heard negative remarks about ‘not being feminine enough’” (Goldblum et al., 2012, p.

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469). This study showed the respondents have a “positive relationship between victimization in

school and depression, anxiety, and lower self-esteem” as well (Goldblum et al., 2012, p. 469).

Furthermore, “in a convenience sample of 55 trans youth (ages 15–21),…nearly 50% of the

participants had seriously thought about suicide at some point in their lives” (Goldblum et al.,

2012, p. 469).

When Laverne Cox spoke of her attempted suicide, she began somewhat candidly. Due to

her calm and matter of fact tone, the content she expressed created a slight shock in the audience.

As she continued her story, she began to speak slower until she stopped altogether. She

apologized and turned away for a moment while the audience sat in stark silence. After a few

moments, she was able to continue speaking, and she finished her story by remarking how she

was going to make her grandmother proud rather than ashamed. It was exceedingly clear this

moment was one of the hardest in her life, and it happened simply because she acted a little

different from the boys in her class.

Gross child cruelty and victimization almost ended a beautiful life before it really had a

chance to get started. This information is relevant to all CWU students. Those in the LGBTQIA

community can glean inspiration on how to push forward in their lives and push past

victimization. For those students not in the LGBTQIA community, this information is a reality

shock that, hopefully, will spawn less acts of victimization and create more understanding. In

owning this information, non-LGBTQIA members can work towards engaging in better

intercultural communication to avoid victimizing, “spooking,” and calling transgender people out

by using inappropriate slurs and trying to tell them who they are “supposed” to be. This

information helps people know the plight of transgender people, and through empathy, people

may be able to “create safe space for people to self identify” (Cox, 2014).

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References

Cox, L. (Director) (2014, November 18). Laverne Cox: “Ain’t I a Woman”. Transgender

Awareness Week. Lecture conducted from Center for Diversity & Social Justice,

Ellensburg.

Goldblum, P., Testa, R., Pflum, S., Hendricks, M., Bradford, J., & Bongar, B. (2012). The

relationship between gender-based victimization and suicide attempts in transgender

people. Professional Psychology: Research & Practice, 43(5), 468-475.

Singh, A. (2013). Transgender youth of color and resilience: Negotiating oppression and finding

support. Sex Roles, 68(11/12), 690-702.