JOUIVMLNOVEMBER 1925 DECATUR

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ixStaleij Journal

tlOUEtriBER. 1925

CONTENTS

no.

PageHarvest Days 5

By H. T. Morris

Mr. Johnson to Chicago 7

"Doctor" 8

By James J. Sleigh

Preparing Rice 9

The Kidneys 10

By Dr. M. W. Fitzpatrick

Editorial 12

Household 16

National Safety Congress 18

Plant Talk 19

Man in the Moon 40

Cartoons Van Hook

Published monthly in the interest of the employesof the A. E. Staley Manufacturing Co., Decatur, 111.

Editor. RUTH E. CADE.10 cents the copy. Subscription 51.00 per year.

The Angler

The patient in the asylum sat fishingover a flower bed. An affable visitoiinquired: "How many have you caught?'

"You're the ninth, so far," replied thtpatient.—DePauw Daily.

Oh, You NovemberJohn: "Just imagine how the womer

would look on Broadway in Garden o,Eden costume."

Henry: "Not bad in summer, but hov.about autumn when the leaves begin tofall!"

Diner: "Waiter, I'll have pork chopswith f r ied potatoes, and I'll have the chopslean."

Waiter: "Yes, sir, which way?"

Guide: "This is one of the originalrooms of the castle; it hasn't been touchedfor 400 years."

Visitor : "That's just like my land-lord - he won't do a thing."

"I hear you've got a new maid at last.Is she a good cook?"

"Oh, yes; she goes to church t wice onSundays - but she can't cook."

"Hey, you," thundered the rushee f romSalt Forks, when they brought in his nap-kin at dinner. "Take this thing away. Iguess 1 know when to use a handkerchiefwithout having no blamed hints thrownat me."

"Why do you call them the '9 by 12'sisters?'*

"You feed them at 9 and at 1 2 theyare hungry again."

Customer "I want a muff."Assistant—"Certainly madam. What

fu r?"Customer—*'To keep me 'ands warm,

of course.*

Rastus "We done sold all our blackmules cause we figgered they et more *anthe white ones."

Sambo "How you all figper dat?"Rastus "We figgered and we figgered

and all we could find out was dat we hadmore black ones than white ones."

First Spinster—"Do you think one longstocking will hold all that you will wantfor Christmas?"

Second Spinster "No, but a pair ofsox would."

Boarder—"Mrs. Jones, may I have an-other CUD of you*- November coffee?"

Mrs. Jones "Why November coffee?"Boarder "Because i t s co ld and

cloud-y."

The Reason WhyA matron was confiding her domestic

troubles to a friend: "I find," said she,"that my husband has charged some onein his office w*th the duty of calling meup every afternoon to mumble terms ofendearment. That's a pretty way to treatone's wife, isn't it? He's been spendinghis afternoons at his Golf Club."

"How was it," asked the friend, "thatyou didn't at once notice that it wasn'this voice that called ?" "Well," ex-plained the aggrieved, "I've been prettybusy w^h bridge every afternoon arid I'vebeen having the maid answer the tele-phone,"

CorrectTeacher: "Now, Gracie, you may tell

the class what it is that elephants havethat no other animal has."

Gracie: "Little elephants."

Fleeced HimMary had a little lamb.His hair was white as snow;Poor Mary's lamb went broke at last,'Cause Mary fleeced him so.

Ed Wynn, famous comedian, tells of alovers* quarrel between Abe and Anna.He was watching them when they quar-relled and parted and that was the firsttime, he declares, that he ever saw Abeand Anna split.

"When you couldn't pay your fare didthe conductor make you get off andwalk?"

"He made me get off but he didn'tseem to care whether I walked or stoodstill."

Oy Oy! Hoot Mon!While Cohen was in Scotland he went

out for a game of golf. A club membercame out, and, as both were lone start-ers, a match was suggested.

"Mv name's McGregor," the Scot said."What do you go around in, McGreg-

or?" Cohen asked."Oh, aro-nd 1 1 2 or I I 4," the Scot an-

swered. "What's your game?""Just about the same," Cohen replied.

"How about $2 a hole?""And do you know," Coh,en said, "that

dirtv crook wen* around in 78 and took$1 f rom me?" Boston Globe.

Oh, Mr. BurbankShe: "How Ho they get the water in

the watermelon?"He: "They plant the seeds in tht-

spring."

He: "Would you wear a rented bathing suit?"

She: That all depends where the rentwas."

Proper MethodBlacksmith: "You say you can shoe a

horse. How would you proceed aboutit?"

Applicant: "Toot my horn until therascal got out of the way."

Abie: "Papa, what's 'science' "?Papa: "Don't be dum-like, Abie. It's

them things like what says 'Keep off thegrass'."

Meyer: "Do you think ignorance isbliss?"

Mr. Nieman: "Well, you seem happy.'

Playing SafeA sergeant was checking a colored re-

cruit's insurance papers."Have you got a beneficiary?" he in-

quired."Nosuhree," replied the negro, grinning

proudly. "Yo" don' ketch me wid nocontretemps goods in mah possessin'. Ahdone tuhned ever'thing ovah to de qua'-tahmastah."

Quite CorrectA teacher was telling her class little

stories in natural history. She askedif anyone could tell her what a ground-hog is. Up went a little hand.

"Well, Tommy, you may tell us whata groundhog is."

"Please, ma'am, it's a sausage."

He: "What do you say to a trampin the woods?"

She: "1 never speak to them!'

"What's your name?""Casey, yer honor.""Your full name?""Just the same, yer honor, f u l l or

sober."

The men who try to do something andfail are infinitely better than those whotry to do nothing and succeed.

In New YorkBerry: "Henry, does your wife under-

stand cars pretfy well?"Beasley: "Well, let me see; I'm afraid

she don't, for she asked me yesterday ifthe engine got hot must she strip thegears!"

Another Problem SolvedEthel (studying grammer) : "Say, Reg-

gie, if a man druggist is called a phar-macist, what would you call a womandr'"*gist ?"

Reggie: "A pharmacister, of course."

"John, does bleach ;ng the hair causesoftening of the brain?

"No darling, but softening of the brainleads to bleaching the hair.'

A Hundred Years AgoA hundred years ago today a wilderness

was here;A man with powder in his gun went forth

to hunt a deer;But now the times have changed some-

what—are on a different plan,A Dear, with powder on her nose, goes

forth to hunt a man.—The Printer'sDevil.

Photos by telephone being now a fact,we suggest an up-to-date simile: "She hasa face like a wrong number." KeithPreston.

Life is not so short but that there is al-ways time enough for courtesy.—Emer-son.

Men are four:He who knows, and knows he knows—

He is wise—follow him.He who knows, and knows not he knows—

He is asleep—awake him.He who knows not, and knows not hr

knows not—He is a fool—shun him.

He who knows not, and knows he knowsnot—

He is a child teach him.—Arabian Proverb.

Regretable Experience of a Relative"What you need is electric baths.""Nothin" doin', doc. I had an uncle

drown that way up in Sing Sing."

The Man (having surrendered hisseat) : "I beg your pardon!"

The Girl: "I didn't speak!"The Man: "Sorry, I'm sure. 1 thought

you said 'thank you'."—Keene Thrusts.

Parson: "Why don't you go in andattend the services?"

Mose: "Cain't, Boss, Ise de crepe."

"Have you heard that Brown's daugh-ter is getting married?"

"Who is the happy man?""Brown!"

Diner (contemplating piece of choco-late cake the waiter had set before him) :"I say, waiter, I ordered Washington pie.Shouldn't the icing be white?"

Waiter: "Only on George Washington pie, sir. This is Booker T. Wash-ington pie."

She: "Men never seem to be able tolook me in the eye."

He: "Then wear 'em longer."

Silas: "Ma, I certainly do miss thatold cuspidor you took away!"

Ma: "Yon certainly did that's why Itook it away!"

Edgin' In

Like th' tentacles of sin,Winter just keeps edgin' in;Makes a monkey as it were,Of your porch thermometer.Climbs a little, then it stops,Rests a while an' then it drops;Keeps you wond'rin' what to wearIf you're goin' anywhere.

Wake up chilly at th' dawn,Want to put your flannels on;Then, by noon, or thereabout,Drag your old Pa'm Beaches out.Winter does things just that way.If you'll notice—ever' dayIt keeps slyly edgin' inLike a schoolboy with a pin!

Winter never lets you knowWhen to look for ice or snow—Just comes sneakin' in an' heavesJack Frost's whitewash on th' leaves.Slips in where old Autumn stillLingers 'round on vale and hill.Spring an' Fall have always beenMarred by Winter's edgin' in.

Still, I guess, if facts were known.Seasons ain't that way alone;I'll confess I hate to sayLots of folks are just that way.Keep your nature sorely vexed—iVarm one day an' cold the nextMake a monkey, as it were,Of your heart's thermometer!

THE STALEYML

Harvest DaysBy H. T. Morris, Starch Sales Manager

In baseball v e r n a c u l a r , the "bigleagues" migrate south to train their help,but the sturdy sons of toil, train them-selves by starting out on their homeground and gradually overcoming thestiffness, aches and pains by "keepingeverlastingly at it" thus overcoming blis-tered, bruised and cut hands, sprainedwrists and other incapitations, until theyare in the "pink of condition."

The painful , necessary but healthfuland usually pleasant job of husking cornis now in full sway and the thumptythump-thump against the "bump board"to the farmer, is as pleasing and equallyenticing as the ratty-tat-tat of the drum-mer rhythm to the ears of a trainedmusician.

Like all honest labor, the knack ofshucking corn is acquired by hard licks ofexperience. Neither is it a "snap". Afterthe corn which was planted in rows threeand one-half feet wide and as long as eachfield would permit, has been laid by, thatis, undergone the last step in cultivationto kill weed growth and mulch the ground,the crop has been left unmolested to fol-low its natural growth to maturity.

From a beautiful panoramic deep green,the field has changed, as the hot sun oflate summer and crisp cool weather ofIndian fall gradually dries up the sap inthe stalk, and this hastened ordinarily bycold, crisp and frosty mornings gives usa varigated color of a buff to yellow land-scape.

He who tills the soil is now contem-plating on cashing in on his season'slabors, and begins to look about to gethis paraphernalia in shape.

First the horses who have enjoyed arest for quite a spell are hitched to thewapon box, which since the harvest ofsmall grain has had little service.

The wagon now carries a double set ofside boards, forming an oblong box about

three feet wide, three feet deep and tenfeet in length. On the "fur" side is builtup another side board about four feet highto serve, in baseball language, as a backstop but in this instance as a "bumpboard."

The husker now equipped with wagon,team, a shucking peg and plenty of tarwith which to keep his gloves resistantagainst the rough usage ahead, as well asto act as an antiseptic to his cut handsstarts forth early in the morning, whenthe frost and chilly air keeps him steppingaround to keep up blood circulation. Quiteoften on his first round the ever handy,useful lantern is resorted to for artificiallight.

As is usual with farm work, the timeclock, whistle or union hours are for-gotten, as to get his two loads per day hemust get out even before the chickensthink of getting off their roosts, for husk-ing prevails during the shortest days ofthe year.

On arriving and in opening up the field,the first row is straddled with the waeon(to be gathered later) and the husker,by use of his shucking peg, strips theshucks from the ear with one twist andwith a twist of the other hand breaks theear from the stalk, and with a simultan-eous move throws the ear "at the wagon"hitting the* bump board and falling in thebed.

The first, second and some times thirdrows are shucked in this fashion clearthrough the field, the wagon turned 'round-on another "down row" and the operationcontinued back over the field.

When the wagon is full it is then trans-ported to the crib, ordinarily on the samefarm, and hauled up along side the crib,either dumped in power driven conveyorsand carried to the top of the crib andthere dropped in a com"artment orscooped by man power into the crib.

THE STALEY JOUIQfAL

Under modern methods one hundredbushel shuckers are common, but evenunder ideal conditions and equipment thisis considered a good days work.

Even before th.s year s crop is huskedthe far sighted farmer is looking for hisnext year's seed corn. Many go throughtheir fields before gathering lime, andpluck good specimen ears, while othershave a box on the front end of theirwagon and while shucking, as they runonto an extraordinary good specimen,separate it from the balance of the loadand throw it into the seed box.

The inclemencies of the weather andunusual season are to be combated fromthe time the corn is first planted until itis husked. A wind storm hitting a fieldof corn af ter it is matured means that agreat deal of corn lays on the ground androts, not only decreasing the value of thecereal, but raising the charge for "shuck-ing".

Thanksgiving is usually the goal for thefarmers to get their corn out of thefields. Like all their other work, huskingmust be gotten out of the way as quicklyas possible, before the snows set in.

During delayed seasons, it is nothinguncommon for fields to lay out throughoutthe winter without being husked. Obvious-ly, a great deal of corn is blown down,left to rot and not recovered in a com-mercial way.

Husking time, therefore, calls for agreat deal of extra help on the farms—the compensation varies, according toconditions, shortage of help, etc. Therate of compensation this year will beapproximately four cents per bushel and"board".

After the corn is gathered from thefields the live stock are then turned in toclean up the foliage and many scatteredears of down corn especially is this truewhen the ground is frozen, so that the soilwill not be "tramped" at the expense ofit working up properly the followingspring.

Literally speaking, we now have thecorn in the crib, where it will be heldpending each farmer 's disposition—eitherfed to live sfock or sold through com-mercial channels.

'But let the good old crop adornThe hills our fathers trod

Still let us, for this golden corn,Send up our thanks to God."

John Green leaf Whittier.

An Ancient Corn Mill

Cheerfulness and content are greatbeautifiers and are famous preservers of«»ood looks ! Barnaby Rudge.

-rw*..^ fc

A pessimist is a person who wouldlook for splinters in a club sandwich.

Because the Staley company is inter-ested, before anything else, in grindingcorn, G. E. Vp.n i romp Govier has givento the Journal office an antique grinding.stone. 1 his grinding stone, or metateas it is properly called, was found by Mr.Govier a few years ago in the northerncentral part of New Mexico.

1 his metate is of valconic lava, a stonewhich is so hard that all efforts to chip ithave been in vain. Evidently it was origin-ally a flat slab about eighteen inches longand ten inches wide and two or threeinches thick. But the constant frictionof the corn and crusher have worn thetop surface into a shallow bowl shape.

Because of its evidences of years of use,Mr. Govier places the age of the metatewhich he found at 1 000 years at least.It probably was used, he believes by somepeoples before the American Indians—perhaps Cl.ff Dwellers, or Pueblo people.

In the September 1 925 issue of theNational Geographic Magazine, Nail M.Judd devotes several paragraphs to me-tates, in writing of the explorations of theNational Geographic Society Expedition inthe Choca Canyon National Monument,New Mexico. He says, in part :

"Step into almost any Pueblo home oftoday and you will find metates (grindingstones) powdered with freshly groundmeal. These characteristic stone m.llshave been inherited from remote an-tiquity. They were utilized alike by cliff-dwellers, occupying caves in the sheer-walled canyons of the Colorado drainage,and by equally ancient peoples whoerected huge clay houses on the flat,cactus covered plains of the Gila.

* * #

"So in Pueblo Bonita a daily task forthe daughters of every household was thepreparation of the allotted ration of maize.Metates were brushed with a bunch ofgrass; the corn was shelled and crushed toa degree of fineness dictated by the par-t icular use for which it was intended."

The method of grinding corn on ametate Is simple. The shelled corn isspread on the stone slab, or metate, andthen crushed and rolled with anothersmaller stone, until it is ground as fineas desired.

THE S7ALEY JOURNAL

Mr. Johnson to ChicagoAnnouncement was made in October

of the appointment of G. A. Johnson asmanager of the A. E. Staley Mfg. Co.,branch office in Chicago. Mr. Johnson isno stranger to Staley people or Staleycustomers, for he was general sales man-ager for the company for three years.His many friends with the company areglad to welcome him back into the of-ficial family.

Mr. Johnson came to the Staley com-pany first in November, 1919, when heresigned a position with the National Gro-cer company to become general salesmanager for Staley's. He remained "withus until December, 1922, when the Na-tional company proved attractive enoughto cause him to leave us. Now after threeyears as manager of the Decatur branchof the National Grocer Co., he returnsto us again.

In the Chicago terri tory he will be nostranger for he has lived in Chicago, andis well known among Chicago grocers andbrokers.

Under an improved arrangement theoffice and wa re houses of the Chicagobranch are now at one address, 363 WestOntario street, and the company officialsfeel sure that this arrangement will notonly prove efficient but will be greatlyappreciated by Chicago customers.

While Mr. Johnson is manager of theChicago branch he has as an able assist-ant John Warren, who will be in chargeof the office there. Mr. Warren, if hewere not still such a young man, mightbe called a Staley veteran for he hasbeen with the company for five years.Until about a year ago he "was in theauditing department, but for the last yearhe has been sales office manager at theDecatur office. He will have much thesame work in the Chicago office.

Mr. Johnson and Mr. Warren have bothmoved to Chicago. Mr. Johnson's familyconsists of his wife and two children—adaughter in the secondary schools and ason, Walter, who is a student and promi-nent athlete at the University of Pennsyl-vania.

Mr. Warren was married more than ayear ago to Mildred Hodgins, of the Staleysales department force. He and his wifehave taken an apartment on the northside of Chicago.

G. A. Johnson took over the management ofthe Staley company branch in Chicago earlyin October. Mr. Johnson was at one time thegeneral sales manager of the Sta'ey company,and is a great favorite among Staley people.

OUR COVER DESIGNThe pompous turkey and snappy little

dog on this month's cover were drawnseveral years ago by R. D. Collins, fatherof Frank Collins of the auditing depart-ment. Mr. Collins, who was a commer-cial artist, died soon after he drew thisdesign and for that reason it had neverbeen used. Frank brought it to TheJournal office several months ago and weliked it so well that we wanted you all tosee it, too, and decided this was the bestway of showing it to you.

Mr. Collins had a studio in Decatur fora number of years, and was well knownas a designer. He specialized in coverdesigns for magazines, and drew a num-ber of covers for the Country Gentlemanand magazines of that type.

In pioneer daysWhen a manReached for his hipEveryone duckedNow he draws a crowd.

Mother: "Yes, my darling, those littleboys next door have no father or mother,and no kind Aunt Jane. Wouldn't youlike to give them something?"

Willie (with great enthusiasm) : "Oh,yes, mamma! Let's give them AuntJane."

•THE STHLEY JOURNAL

"Doctor"By James J, Sleigh

"Doctor." To the lay mind the wordusually suggests dire thoughts of an im-pending illness or the anticipated receiptof a huge bill for professional services. Soa few words of explanation may be ofbenefit to our readers who are not thor-oughly posted on the use or meaning ofthe word as it applies to the manufac tu r -ing of confectionery.

A doctor is a catalytic agent that hasthe power to split up or invert a crystal-ized sugar. Heat for example is a cataly-zer but heat alone cannot be applied tocane sugar in making candy to get theproper amount of inversion, for when themoisture contained in the syrup evapor-ates the result is a solidified mass of sugarcrystals. If sufficient heat were appliedto totally destroy the crystals the syrupwould caramelize and would be only ofvalue to the manufacturer as a coloringagent commonly called sugar color. Fromthis fact it is very readily seen that heatand water alone have not sufficientcatalytic power to split the sugar and pre-vent crystallization. It is therefore neces-sary to resort to a vehicle that can beused in conjunction with heat and waterto cause the complete or the partial in-version of the sugar crystals sufficientlyto prevent the sugar from recrystallizing.For a number of years acid doctors suchas cream of tartar, tartaric acid, etc., wereused to cause this reaction and producethe proper amount of inversion requiredat a temperature that would not sacrificethe color or quality of the confection.These acids or acid salts, however, couldnot be relied upon to work uniformly andso the modern manufacturing confec-tioner today uses a recognized uniformdoctor made f rom corn. Corn syrup is amore uniform doctor than acid salts suchas cream of tartar, tartartic acid, etc.

The action of acid doctors and cornsyrup is not precisely the same. Aciddoctors prevent crystallization by invertinga crystallizing sugar into one that doesnot crystalize and also is very hydros-copic and soft under humid conditions.Corn syrup on the other hand preventscrystallization by supplying another formof non-crystallizing sugar the presence ofwhich prevents the cane sugar from re-crystalizing. Thus an acid doctor changesthe cane sugar to a different fo rm whilecorn syrup does not, and the resultingcandy made with an acid doctor containsmore invert sugar than one made withcorn syrup.

Very often inversion of the sucrose(cane sugar) is carried too far due to the

excessive amount of acid doctor used, theresult being a piece that will not stand upand in a very short time will becomesticky and soft. What really happens inthe over-doctored batch is that the ex-cessive amount of acid used splits up thephysical or molecular proportions of thesucrose (cane sugar) which is CuHttQiiforming an excessive amount of dextroseand levulose in equal proportion ofCuHuO.: known as invert sugar. Thelevulose formed by the over inversion, be-ing of a very hydroscopic nature, willdraw the moisture to the piece and thuscause it to become sticky.

On the other hand if insufficient doctoris used to get the proper inversion of thesucrose to give the best results, an exces-sive amount of crystallizable sucrose isstill held in suspension when the batch isfinished. This condition of course has theopposite effect to that mentioned above,as the over amount of uninverted sucrosewill cause the finished product to take ona cloudy and unsightly film, known toand spoken of by the candy maker asgraining off.

Either of these conditions, which arevery detrimental to the sale and eatingquality of the confection can be materiallyreduced and in fact very often entirelyeliminated by the use of a quality cornsyrup. When the candy manufacturerhits upon a formula consisting of canesugar, corn syrup, and water in the properproportions, and the degree of tempera-ture of the cook to suit the various con-ditions under which the product is manu-factured result in a hard, dry, high glossyfinished piece; there will be very little ifany change in the finished product fromday to day. This is due to the fact thatvery little variation occurs in a properlyrefined confectioner's corn syrup.

CharacteristicsAdmiral Sims was talking about racial

characteristics at a dinner party."Eight men," he said, "were once

wrecked on a desert island. A year latera ship picked them up. The skipper ofthe ship noted in his log that:

"The two Irishmen had fought eachother twice a day during the whole year.

'The two Scotchmen had founded aCaledonian society.

"The two Englishmen had not spokenbecause they had never been introduced.

"The two Americans had opened a realestate agency in a palm-leaf hut, with aKiwanis club, a Boosters' league and ahooch-making plant in the cellar."

THE STALEY JOURNAL

Mr. Cardozo, of the Amsterdam, Holland, firm of Cardozo & Boekman, visited us late inSeptember and renewed acquaintance with Staley friends he made on his last visit to thiscountry several years ago. On this trip Mr. Cardozo was accompanied by his secretary, Mr.Miranda, whose first visit to America this was. In the picture Mr. Cardozo is seated at theleft, Mr. Miranda standing in the center and Mr. Chamberlain, our general superintendent atthe right.

called, is used in preparing rice for themarket.

According to the Standard Rice Com-pany, Inc., of Memphis, Tenn., packers ofWhite House rice, the process is this:

After the rice (the finished product)has passed through its last process ofbleaching, it is taken into drums or largecylinders. These drums are twelve feetlong and five feet in diameter, and holdfrom 4,000 to 5,000 pounds each.

The cylinders are set so that they aretilted to a slight degree, and the tendencyof the grain is to discharge itself fromthe lower end. These cylinders, whichare called trumbols, revolve slowly.

As the grain enters the trumbols a thinstream of corn syrup, no bigger than amatch, flows over it. This corn syrupwashes each grain and leaves the surfacejust sticky enough to cause the thinstream of talcum powder, next allowed toflow into the trumbol, to adhere to eachgrain.

Then as the grains of rice are tossedabout within the trumbols the frictioncauses the talcum to "finish" the grain,giving it a high lustre.

The Standard company then packsthe polished rice in neat cartons whichmakes it much more attractive to buythan the old method of tieing it up in abrown paper bag which often sprang aleak on the way home from the store.

Preparing RiceWithin the last few years, particularly

since the war, Americans north of theMason-Dixon line have begun to realizethe possibilities of a food which the orient-als discovered centuries ago, and havebeen using ever since. This food is rice,the little pearl-like cereal which many ofus grew up believing was used by theChinese as food and by Americans as afitting weapon with which to salute a de-parting newly married couple.

But while the people in the northernpart of the United States were using riceexternally only, our neighbors to thesouth were raising it in their swampyfields and their famous black cooks, trueartists every one, were originating newways to cook the highly nutritious grain.

Then the war brought its strict foodrulings, and we were urged and kiddedinto eating rice, and now we like it. Allthis urging naturally has increased con-siderably the demand for rice, and withthe growing demand, as usual, has comean improvement in the methods of pre-paring and packing the grain for the mar-ket.

And in this process of preparation theA. E. Staley Mfg. Co., has a small but im-portant part to play. For glucose, orpure corn syrup as it is more properly

THE STALEY JQU$NA&

The KidneysBy Dr. M. W. Fitzpatrick

The kidneys are among the most vitalorgans of the body and as might naturallybe expected any disease of them or dis-turbance of their funct ion reflects itselfupon the well being of the individual.They may be likened to the sewer systemof a city. It does not require much effortof the imagination to picture to ourselveswhat would happen if the whole sewersystem of one of our cities were damagedin such a way as to put it out of use.Less degrees of damage would be lessserious but still demand prompt and care-ful attention in an effort to repair thedamage. When the kidneys are diseasedtheir function is impaired, and health suf-fers accordingly.

There has been, and is even now, agreat deal of mystery and misinformationon the part of the general public concern-ing kidney disease. This situation hasbeen brought about and is fostered prin-cipally by quacks and advertising physi-cians. In former years when a consider-able portion of the income of a newspaperwas derived from medical advertisements,one could pick up almost any periodicaland find in it a picture of a man bentover, his hand on his back, and an expres-sion of agony on his face, and under thispicture the caption: "If you have painin the back you have kidney trouble."Nothing is much far ther from the truth.Very rarely does the patient with realkidney trouble have pain in the back.Only when there is very acute inflamma-tion does this sympton manifest itself.And for this reason it is a very treacher-ous disease for many times the trouble iswell advanced before its presence is sus-pected. There is nothing in the earlystages to indicate its presence and thusmake the patient seek medical aid.

The normal kidney is a well balancedorgan composed principally of a multi tudeof tubules whose funct ion is to filter wasteproducts f rom the blood as it passesthrough these organs. While this func-tion is very definite it is also caoable of awide range of accommodation as toamount of work. It may be called uponone dav to do twice as much work as itis on ano fher, and assume the new burdenverv read'ly.

But as there is a l imit to the uossibili t iedof e^erv or^an, so there is a linv*: beyondwhich the kidnev cannot go. When thisis exceeded its function begins to be im-pa ;red. At first this damage may be onlyslifht and if the overload is removed, nor-mal kidney action may be restored. Too

often, however, there being no warningas to impairment of the organ, the dis-eased condition goes on and on for a longtime until there are permanent structuralchanges before the patient is aware any-thing is wrong and aid is sought. Thenit is too late to obtain complete relief.

What is this overload that brings onkidney trouble? That is a question thathas puzzled investigators the world over.There is no decisive and definite answer.Probably there are a great many differentthings that enter into the conundrum, andeither alone or in combination with one ormore circumstance cause damage to thekidney tissue.

It is well known that kidney diseaseir. apt to follow the acute infectious dis-eases, notably scarlet fever. Many timesit has been found soon after an attack ofpneumonia, typhoid, measles, small pox,diphtheria, or in fact any of the infectionscausing fever. Or chronic poisoning, asfrom diseased tonsils, abscessed teeth, orother points of infection in the system,may be held responsible. It is a moatquestion whether the ingest ion of certainfoods or condiments might be blamed,some claiming that the use of much saltirritates the kidneys while others are notimpressed with its danger. However, thismay be, a physician who plays safe by ad-vising the rigid restriction of salt will usu-ally be met by the exclamation from hispatient: "Oh, my! I just dearly lovesalt." This is such a common expressionf rom patients with kidney trouble that oneis almost forced to the conclusion that theexcessive use of salt has been, to someextent at least, partly the cause of thedisease.

E-xoosure to cold and wet weather alonecan hardly be blamed for kidney disease,but with a predisposition, or some chronicpoisoning in the body, this weather condi-tion may be the final factor in breakingdown the kidnev balance.

In 1918 and 1919 when we were havingour severe epdemic of influenza, physi-cians dreaded to see this disease attacktheir patients who had any impairmentof the kidnevs. for it usuallv meant deathfor the victim. One illustrative casemi^ht be cited. A man who had had asevere acute nenhritis (w'dnev d ;sease),bv careful re«"lat»on of his hab'ts, h'sdiet, etc., had been able to free himselfa^ter several months of all evidence ofkidney trouble. His health had imorovedso much that he had resumed his workunder certain restrictions and was doing

THE STALEY JOURNAL

quite well in the matter of health. Hecontracted a moderately severe influenzaand immediately his kidneys broke downagain and his death was recorded in avery few days, his final symptoms beingthose of kidney disease.

Aside f rom its slow onset, nephritis isaccompanied by changes in the heart andblood vessels. This is not strange whenwe recall that all the blood in the bodymust be forced through the kidneys asfilters at f requent intervals. When thekidneys are damaged the heart must workharder to send the blood through. Theheart being a muscular organ enlargesunder the burden of increased work andin time becomes of such great size that itis called the "ox heart." The arteriesunder the last of the circulation thickenand we have increased blood pressure andlater on hardening of the arteries. Withthis combination of circumstances theblood vessels in the brain may give wayunder some unusual strain, as the inges-tion of too much food or drink, overwork,mental strain, and there is a hemorrhageinto the brain substance with resultingparalysis or possibly death. In otherwords the patient has a stroke of apop-lexy. Other patients will not travel justthe course outlined above but will displaya deterioration of the mental powers.Dimness of vision comes on. With agradual decrease of kidney funct ion thereis an accumulation of waste products inthe system until the point of saturation isreached and uremia supervenes. In thisthe patient may gradually lapse into astupor f rom which he may recover underproper and vigorous treatment, or the firstattack may be the last; he may not re-spond to treatment of any k*nd and passout in a few hours or davs. Other uremicpatients may have convulsive seizures, atfirst sl'-^ht, but later more severe untildeath closes the scene.

Exanvnation of the urine is the prin-cipal method of determining the presenceof kidney disease. There is albumin pres-ent as a rule, together with casts. Thepresence of albumin in the ur*ne indicateskidney damage, but it may be transitoryand of no great significance. But whencasts are found in any considerable num-bers one may be certain the kidney de-struction is at least moderatelv advancedand is of a serious nature. The move-ment now on fo*">* to have f r ^au^n t healthexanvna*'ons, wK'ch would inc lude anexam ;nat ;on of the i 'r ;ne, \v ;ll aid "readyin dete-~ti n" the earlv cases of ne^hr ;t :s,at a t ime when treatment will be of somereal value.

Kidnev disease is a serious ailment, butone need not be at all despondent underproper management the patient may live

many years of useful and comfortable life.One Decatur man lived more than twentyyears after the first discovery of albuminin his urine and during this time he con-tinued to manage his business very suc-cessfully. When he finally died it wasfrom pneumonia and not f rom nephritis.

In the treatment of kidney disease medi-cine plays a minor role. The all import-ant thing is to make the work of the kid-neys as light as possible. Their funct ionis to take waste products out of the blood.If the least possible amount of waste isthrown into the blood there will corre-spondingly be less work for the kidneys.Therefore the diet should not be morethan is needed to maintain proper bodilyactivity. Other organs of the body thatmay aid in elimination should be keptactive. Chief among these is the skin.While the skin can not entirely replace thekidney funct ion yet it can aid very greatly.Therefore sweat baths under proper su-pervision aid us in the fight for health.Free elimination through the bowels, bykeeping a certain amount of poison outof the system, lightens the task of thekidney. Even the lungs aid in throwingoff some of the poisons.

Where a diseased condition is found inany part of the body that might be an un-derl^-ng factor of kidney impairment, thatshould receive aporonriate treatment.D:seased tonsils should be removed.Mont-b infections should be looked aftercarefully.

If vou should find you have kidneytrouble seek the advise of the best physi-cian you can find.

B'it alwavs bear in mind that pain inthe back is not a symptom of kidney dis-ease. It mav be severe enough to requirea Careful examination bv a nWsioian, butonlv in verv rare 'n^an^es w:H it be foundthat there is anv k'dnev involvement.

TO DIRECT RESEARCHHarry F. Watson has been apno'nted

director of research in the Staley labora-tory, and w1!! supervise the operation ofthe research men there. This arrangement follows the appointment of L. R.Brown as director of routine control inthe « laboratorv. Both Mr. Watson andMr. Brown will co-operate with HowardF'le, ch'^f chem'st, in directing theno lilies of the technical deoartment. Mr.Wafson has been w;th the comoanv for*p"eral vears. Mr. Brown has been in thelaboratory for about a vear.

Fussy PublicClerk: "These are the best oysters

we've had for a year."Customer: "Let's see some you 'v<»

only had for six months." Pelican.

Something for NothingHe's out again—the fellow who carries a grouch about, complaining

all the time because everything costs so much. If you are willing to listen,which you probably are NOT, he will go into detail about prices. Well,the next time he corners you, (he likes best to get off in some corner duringworking hours and talk) just give him a little list of the good things whichare free—then tell him to forget his grouch and shut up—at any rate toshut up.

What are the free things? We seem to be especially blessed withthem here in Decatur.

The one which offers the widest choice to its patrons and is most easilyreached is the public library. Tell Old Grouch that one of the best curesin the world for what ails him is a daily dose of reading. He can walk tothe library (he probably needs the exercise anyway and walking is free)and in one evening's reading there he can travel to any part of the world.Or for that matter he can drop into the Journal office, where a branch of thepublic library is established and get a book to read at home without evenpossessing a library card. What could be more free than that?

Then there are pictures. Not the moving kind for theater men arein the business to make a living—but paintings and etchings done by worldfamous artists and brought from the far parts of the earth for the pleasureof Decatur folk. Scarcely a week passes but what something worth whileis on exhibit at the Decatur Art Institute and there never is an admissioncharge. Of course Old Grouch will scoff at this, but that is because he hasnever taken a few extra minutes to look at such an exhibit. Once get himout there and you will have a hard time dragging him away.

December would be a good time to take him to the Art Institute fortwo Decatur men are exhibiting their work there that month. Robert Riggs,Decatur born and educated, is bringing some of his drawings from his Phila-delphia studio. Many of them are drawings he has made in his travels .inodd corners of the world. The other Decatur artist is L. C. Shellabarger,whom doubtless many of you know. He does not paint pictures, but worksin silver and his exhibits will be of lovely pieces of jewelry and tablewarewhich he has made. And both exhibits will be free.

Then, if Grouch wants something livelier tell him about our Pellowship club entertainments—our winter programs, our dances and oursummer movies. Tell him that this winter we are having ten entertain-ments in the high school auditorium—musical programs and plays—givenby high salaried lyceum entertainers, and that all Fellowship club membersand their families can enjoy them free of charge. The same holds true ofthe club dances held once each month, and of the weekly movies duringthe summer.

After all that he should be convinced that there are some good thingsin this world which are free, don't you think?

12

THE STALKY JOURNAL

STALEYS

George E. Radasch, that healthy looking man on the right, is our Iowa representative, andit was under his direction that this display of Staley Syrups was arranged at a fa i r in Keokuk,W. W. Daley, a Staley salesman, is shown with him.

Former Editor HereOne of the most charming things which

has happened to us recently was the sud-den appearance in The Journal office onemorning in October of Mrs. Fred Sud-darth. Mrs. Suddarth is better known toall Staley people as Dorothy Baker, thefirst ditor of The Journal.

Mrs Suddarth was back in Decatur fromher home in Kansas City for a short time,and gave us part of one day during herbrief visit. It has been five years sinceMrs. Suddarth resigned her position hereas editor of The Journal and in that timeshe has made only one visit here, but inthose five years she had rememberedStaley people as they have rememberedher.

She came into The Journal office withher same old smile and put us to shamewith the ease with which she named offthe various Staley people about whomshe wanted to enquire. She recognizedThe Journal office fern, which was in-stalled in office, as it were, during her

reign, she asked if Fred Klumpp was mar-ried, if Charley Burkey still worked in thelaboratory, if Harry Wamsley had evergot fat. She visited as many of the officesand saw as many of the men as her limitedtime allowed, and in every instance wasgreeted with a warmth which showed howmuch all Staley people thought of her.

Mrs. Suddarth came to the Staley com-pany to take charge of The Journal inJanuary, 1919, when The Staley Journalwas scarcely more than a pamphlet.Under her editorship it was reorganizedinto its present form and almost its pres-ent size, and the three editors who havefollowed her have found themselves striv-ing to live up to the high ideals she set forthe publication.

Although her visit at the plant wasmuch too short, it was thoroughly enjoyedby all the old friends who saw Mrs. Sud-darth, and we are hoping that she willbe back to pay us a longer visit beforeanother two years have passed.

13

THE STALEY JOURNAL

November Entertainments

Wednesday, Nov. 4 Snider-Haig Recital CompanyTuesday, Nov. 10 DuMond SerenadersTuesday, Nov. 24 "Adam and Eva," a playMonday, Nov. 30 "Two Fellows and a Girl," a play

We have had entertainment series wh^chhave started off well but our 1 925-26lyceum series started off with a regularbang. The opening number of the year'sentertainment series was given by the SohsMarimba Band. It was perfectly evidentthat everyone at Staley's was glad thatthe season was opening, for at no otherS la ley entertainment had there ever beensuch a big crowd.

The program was announced for 8o'clock, and long before that time everygood seat on the main floor of the Highschool auditorium was taken, and by thetime the curtain went up, much of the bal-cony was filled. And the crowd wasn'tdisappointed, for the Solis Marimba bandis one of the best in the country. Theprogram given by these genial SouthAmericans was enjoyed by every onepresent.

During November we will have fourentertainments in the High school, eachone just a little better than the one beforeit. As before, these programs will beginat 8 o'clock and are free to all membersof the Staley Fellowship club and theirfamilies. Practically everyone was seatedbefore the program began at the lastentertainment.

The first entertainment this month is

the one to be given by the Snider-HaigRecital company, Nov. 4. Miss NelleSnider and Miss Joan Haig, who make upthis company, sing, play the piano andgive readings. Their program is variedand interesting as well as entertaining.

The DuMond Serenaders, who enter-tain us Nov. 1 0 give an entirely differentsort of program. This company is madeup of four men and a girl, who sing, andplay almost an un-numbered variety ofinstruments . One man sings, plays thepiano and the accordion. Another singsand plays the saxophone, another singsand plays the banjo, and another singsand plays another saxophone and the clar-inet. The young woman sings and playsthe piano and the banjo.

Just before Thanksgiving, on Nov. 24,we have a play, "Adam and Eva" whichis one of the famous comedies of the lastseason. It is fu l l of laughs and well worthseeing.

A week later, on Nov. 30, we will haveanother play by an entirely different com-pany. This play is also fu l l of laughs andone which you will all want to see. It is"Two Fellows and a Girl".

So you see there is a great time in storefor all of us during November.

THANKSGIVING

Don't talk to me of solemn daysIn autumn's time of splendor,

Because the sun shows fewer raysAnd these grow slant and slender.

Why, it's the climax of the year—The highest time of living!

Till naturally it's bursting cheerJust melts into thanksgiving.

—Paul Laurence Dunbar.

14

THE STALEY JOURNAL

A picture like this should be entitled "What the well dressed man is wearing in the countryand at the seaside". George Dean, our Spartanburg, S. C. manager is the well dressed man. Inone picture he is standing in front of his home in Spartanburg. In the other he is shown idlingon the beach at Ocean City, N. J.

Mr. Weir to RussiaMr. J. M. Weir, until recently in charge

of the civil engineering department of thisorganization, has accepted a position withthe Georgian Manganese Company atTchiatouri, Russia. This company is mak-ing elaborate plans for the development ofwhat is understood to be the largest de-posit of manganese in the world. Thisdeposit is located 125 or 150 miles dueeast of the eastern extremity of the BlackSea. A narrow gauge railway f rom theBlack Sea now runs eastward about 80miles. This is to be rebuilt to the Rus-sian standard gauge, five feet, ballastedand possibly double t racked; in any caseit is to be made a first-class freight line.From the point 80 miles east of the BlackSea the new standard gauge line swingsto the northeast for an additional distanceof perhaps 45 miles. In this district aremany problems of heavy construction, theterrain consisting largely of cliffs, can-yons and narrow turbulent water courses.The design and completion of this workwill require the greatest ingenuity anddaring on the part of the chief engineer.He will be compelled to overcome manyother handicaps—difficulty in securingmachinery and other material, and the de-velopment of trained labor from the native

moron type. It is a work that will crownits builder with a halo of professionalglory. It will require all the ingenuity,experience and indomitable stamina withwhich our friend Weir is so amply pro-vided to even make a mark on the job.

The Shamrock of dear old Ireland hasbeen transferred into many strange andremote parts of the glove and we have nodoubt that it will take strong root in theCaucasian mountains, and that there willfollow a strong market for blackthornsand Bushmil lall through that district. Inall probability future generations willspeak with a touch of Irish brogue.

We are glad that our fr iend Weir hasfound a job which measures up to hisability; we are glad the Georgian Mangan-ese Company have found a man whomeasures up to their job, and we predictthat both will be highly pleased withresults.

Speak Only WellO be not the first to discover

A flaw in the fame of a friend,A fau l t in the faith of a brother

Whose heart may be true to the end,For we none of us know one another

And oft into error may fall .Then let us speak well of each other;

When we can't, let us not speak at all.

Hou/eholdRice in Many New Forms

These recipes for cooking rice are usedby the courtesy of the Standard Rice Co.To those housewives whose rice disheshave been limited to rice au gratin andrice pudding, these recipes will be a re-lief .

SALMON RICE CROQUETTESOne cup rice, 1 can salmon, 2 eggs,

1 cup cracker crumbs. Boil rice untiltender and set aside to cool. Shred sal-mon with fork, removing all bones, andmix well with the rice. Roll in smallballs, then dip into the beaten egg androll in cracker crumbs. Fry in deep fat .

CODFISH BALLS WITH RICEOne cup boiled rice, 1 cup codfish, 2

cups mashed potatoes, 1 tablespoon but-ter (melted), 2 beaten eggs, 3 teaspoonscream. Mix together, shape into ballsand fry in butter or lard.

CREAMED SALMON IN RICE CUPTwo cups rice, 1 large can salmon, 3

cups milk, 4 tablespoons flour, 2 cannedpimentoes, 2 teaspoons salt, 1 teaspoonpaprika, 2 quarts cold water, 1 cup but-ter, 2 eggs, bread crumbs. Make awhite sauce, using half the butter, and addpimento rubbed through sieve, and sal-mon.

Cook the rice with water, and half cupof butter, until tender. Spread out ona platter about two inches deep, andwhen cool, cut into rounds with cookiecutter, dip in eggs, roll in crumbs andbrown in deep fat. Drain and when cool,scoop out center. Reheat in the oven,fill with creamed salmon and serve hot.

WHITE HOUSE ARROZOne-half cup rice, 3 cups water, 1 ta-

blespoon chili powder, 1 chopped onion,2 tablespoons bacon fat, 1 small can to-matoes, 1 teasooon salt, dash cayenneand paorika. Fry raw rice in bacon fatuntil brown. Add three cups of waterand let simmer until rice is soft. Addtomatoes, chili powder, salt, cayenne,onion and paprika. Cook about half anhour.

CAROLINA RICE PIEOne pound of rice, 1 three-pound

chicken, 4 eggs, '/g pound butter. Stewchicken in salted water slowly, until wellcooked. Strain to remove meat frombones. Cook rice in 1 pint of the chick-en broth, for 20 minutes.

Pour 1 cup of broth in bottom of pud-ding pan, then half the rice, then half thechicken, then sliced hard cooked eggs,and seasoning. Repeat, and then pourtwo cups of broth over it all, and putinto the oven to brown.

This is an old southern method ofcooking chicken and rice, but it is wellworth the longer time it takes.

CHICKEN WITH RICE AND PEPPERSTwo cups boiled rice, 2 cups cooked

chicken, 1 cup gravy or stock, 1 greensweet pepper, '/^ cup buttered crumbs.Put layer of cooked rice in bottom ofbaking dish, dot with chicken and stripsof pepper. Repeat until dish is filled.Pour gravy over it, sprinkle with fine but-tered crumbs and bake 30 minutes.

HAMBURG STEAK WITH RICEThree cups boiled rice, I pound ham-

burg steak, I chopped on:on, cupwater, salt, pepper and powdered sage.Cook the meat, with onion, saee, 1 cup ofwater and seasoning for I 5 minutes.Then put into baking pan which has beenlined with rice cooked until tender inmilk. Cover with a layer of rice andbake 1 5 minutes. Turn out on a hot plat-ter and serve with tomato sauce.

Pack the rice into six small cups ormolds and set aside. Arrange the slicesof pineapple on crisp leWuce leaves andturn a mold of rice over each slice, pourFrench dressing over the rice and garnishwith a stiff mayonnaise.

RICE POP OVERSOne cup boiled rice, 1/2 cup flour, I

pint sweet milk, 3 eggs, I tablespoon but-ter, 1/2 teaspoon salt. Stir drv ingred-ients and butter into scalded milk. Beatthoroughly and add well beaten eggs.Bake 20 minutes in hot oven.

THE STALE? JOURNAL

RICE WAFFLESOne and one-half cups boiled rice, 2

cups flour, 2 tablespoons sugar, 3 tea-spoons baking powder, 2 tablespoonsmelted fat, J/j teaspoon salt, 2 eggs, 1 Y^cups milk. Mix dry ingredients and sift.Beat egg yolks, add milk and stir intorice. Add dry ingredients and beat untilsmooth. Stir in the fat and then fold inthe stiffly beaten whites. Cook on a hotwaffle iron and serve with butter andsyrup.

BACON AND RICEEight slices of bacon, 2 cups of boiled

rice, 4 eggs. Fry bacon carefully. Pouroff half the fat and to the remainder inthe frying pan add the cooked rice intowhich the eggs have been stirred. Cookuntil the egg is set and then heap in thecenter of a hot plate and surround withbacon.

COMBINATION SALADTwo cups boiled rice, J/^ cup chopped

pimento, J/2 cup grated cheese, J/2 cupgreen pepper or olives, ]/2 cup choppedcelery, salad dressing. Mix rice well withother ingredients and serve on lettuceleaf with French dressing, mayonnaise ora cheese dressing. If cheese dressing isused, omit the cheese in the salad.

RICE DAISY SALADTwo cups boiled rice, 1 head lettuce,

1 cup raisins, 3 hard cooked eggs, Frenchdressing. Place lettuce leaf on saladplate; put a tablespoon of raisins on cen-ter and a roll of cold boiled rice aroundthem. Cut a hard cooked egg into stripsand place around the rice, like daisypetals. Serve with a mild French dress-ing made with lemon juice instead ofvinegar.

RICE PATTIESOne cup boiled rice, 2 tablespoons

flour, 1 cup milk, 2 eggs, 1 tablespoonbutter, I pinch salt, I pinch nutmeg. Mixthoroughly rice and flour. Add boilingmilk and cook until it thickens, stirringconstantly. Add butter, salt, nutmeg andegg yolks. Beat well and fold in eggwhites beaten stiff. Cook for a few min-utes. Drop into greased gem pans andbake in moderate oven until brown.

DATE RICE PUDDINGOne-half cup rice, J/^ pound dates, 2

tablespoons sugar, J/2 cup milk. Boil ricein two cups of water until water is ab-sorbed and rice is soft. Stone dates andcut into pieces. Mix dates and sugarwith rice, pour into greased baking pan,add milk and bake one hour. Serve cold.

RICE SNOW BALLSOne cup boiled rice, 3 egg whites, 3

teaspoons sugar, I tablespoon butter, J/2teaspoon lemon flavoring. Mix rice,sugar and melted butter thoroughly.Form into balls and place in flat bakingdish and bake, without browning, for tenminutes. Pour over the balls, egg "whitesbeaten dry, to which have been addedthree teaspoons pulverized sugar and thelemon extract. Set in a warm oven todry but not to brown and serve withwhipped cream.

MERINGUE OF RICEOne cup rice, 3 cups boiling water, 1

pint milk, 4 eggs, I tablespoon butter,rind of I lemon, J/2 cup sugar, 1 table-spoon lemon juice. Cook rice in boilingwater and when water has boiled awayadd milk, butter, beaten egg yolks andlemon rind. Pour into buttered bakingdish and bake until set. Beat egg "whitesuntil dry, add sugar and lemon juice.When pudding is done spread meringueover it and brown light on top.

RICE FRUIT PUDDINGOne cup rice, 1 cup cooked apples, 2

eggs, 1 teaspoon butter, J/2 teaspooncinnamon, pinch salt. To rice add ap-ples, cinnamon and salt. Beat eggs, addbutter and stir into mixture; bake halfhour and serve with sauce.

PINEAPPLE SALADOne and one-half cups boiled rice, 6

slices canned pineapple, lettuce, Frenchdressing and mayonnaise.

Not the Only One

"I see you have furnished rooms," saidthe man who had rung the bell.

"Thot we have, begorra," said thewoman who came to the door.

"Well, if you have one that's suitableI'd like to rent it for a while."

"But I don't rent me rooms. Me familytakes up the whole house."

"Don't rent any rooms? Then whyhave you that sign 'Furnished Rooms' inthe window?"

• "Well, it's this way. Last week thotMrs. Kelly next door she puts up a signin her front window, an' whin I see herput up wan I just had to show the peoplethot Mrs. Kelly ain't the only wan onthis street thot has her rooms furnished."

Census Taker (to middle-aged spin-ster) : "And what is your age, madam?"

Spinster (coyly): "I've seen j u s ttwenty-five summers."

Census Taker: "How long have youbeen blind?"

17

THE STXLEY JOURNAL

National Safety CongressTo be thoroughly convinced of the im-

portance with which the world regardsthe safety movement in industry one needonly attend one session of the NationalSafety Congress. The National SafetyCouncil, the membership of which is madeup of industries of various kinds all overthe United States and Canada, holds itsannual congress each autumn. The four-teenth annual congress recently closed amost successful session in Cleveland.

At this congress are men from allbranches of industry. Presidents of rail-roads and directors of big industrial plantsfeel the matter is important enough forthem to devote their own time to. Menfrom the shops and factories attend andcompare experiences and needs with themen higher up.

Because of the wide variety of indus-tries holding membership in the NationalSafety Council, there are always 5,000or more persons attending each Congress.The Congress has been divided into sec-tions so that each person attending candevote all of his time to the special branchof safety work in which he is most inter-ested.

In the section devoted to editors ofplant publications one of the most inter-esting talks "was made by a machinist fromthe Baltimore & Ohio railroad shops, W. L.Stephens. Mr. Stephens has been a ma-chinist for years and in his work in therailroad shops he has seen the great nec-essity for safety work. He sketched oversome of the things which he had seenhappen because of disregard of safety,and then told how the company magazine,through stressing safety had been educat-ing the people away from such careless-ness.

Practically every speaker emphasizedthe fact that carelessness is now the onebig thing which causes most of the in-dustrial accidents. The desire to take achance is the desire which leads to acci-dents and deaths. To lead people tothink safety always, to act safety always.to talk safety always, was laid down asthe mission of every one attending themeeting.

One safety speaker said, "I tell my mento always remember this, 'How will it af-fect my wife if some fellow has to gohome and tell her I got an arm cut off oran eye put out this morning '?"

The two Decatur representatives at theCleveland Congress were J. K. Stafford, ofthe Mississippi Valley Structural SteelCompany, and Ruth Cade, of The StaleyJournal. As it happens these two com-panies are close neighbors and during the

Dr. Edward Bartow, famous chemist from theUniversity of Iowa, has been a frequent andwelcome caller at our plant recently, since hehas been called in to consult with other chem-ists and engineers on Decatur's sewage prob-lem.

coming year should stand as safety exam-ples for the other industries in Decatur.

But if we do that we will each one haveto

THINK SAFETY,ACT SAFETY,TALK SAFETY

ALWAYS.

Business Is GoodThe farmer sells a load of wheat,And all the world grows fa i r and sweet;He hums a couple of cheerful tunes,And pays the grocer for his prunes.The grocer, who has had the blues,Now buys his wife a pair of shoes;The ten the shoeman thinks God sent,And runs and pays it on the rent.Next day the rentman hands the billTo Dr. Carver for a pill.And Dr. Carver tells his frauThat business is improving now,And cheers her up and says *"My dear,You've been quite feeble for a year,I'm thinking you should take a rest;You'd better take a trip out west;"And in a couple of days the frauIs on the fa rm of Joshua Howe,Who takes the bill and says "I swow,Here's something that cannot be beat,This bill's the one 1 got for wheat."He hums a couple of cheerful tunes,And goes and buys a lot more prunes.

—A. W. Manuel.

18

WIN PRIZESNow Staley company cattle are taking

prizes at the National Dairy Show. Asone of the 1 0 companies which makes upthe Associated Corn Products Manufac-turers the Staley company has its share inthe honor which comes with the prizesawarded the cattle entered by the associa-tion in the Dairy show, recently held inIndianapolis.

The association entered 97 cows in theshow—all cows which had been fed oncorn gluten feed—and these 97 cows took1 10 ribbons. This included all championand first prize ribbons. The prizes wonby the Association cows amounted toabout $2500.00. When 52 of the cowswere sold after the show they brought$7417.50 .

Ten companies in the United States,corn products manufacturers, who makecorn gluten feed, have formed this or-ganization and have become joint ownersof these cattle. The cattle are used asshining examples of what corn gluten feedwill do, and the National Dairy Show inIndianapolis gave the association an op-portunity to show the world at large theseresults.

These corn gluten feed cows were oneof the chief attractions, according to E.W. Martin, our feed sales manager, whoattended the show in Indianapolis.

FOR RUEL COCHENNOURRuel Cochennour, who left the com-

pany in October after several years in theauditing department, was the honoredguest at three parties just before he left.His sister gave a surprise party for himin his home one evening, the guests be-ing some of his intimate boy friends.Late in the evening a supper was served.

The following night Marguerite Doo-ley, of the auditing department, gave asmall party for him. The night beforehe left town several boys gave a partyfor him in AI Lukey's cottage in Fariespark,

Ruel left Staley's to take a position witha firm in Newport, Ky.

He: "Dearest, why do you always an-swer a question by asking another?"

She: "Do I?" Jack-O-Lantern.

Robert Eugene Mueller, the son of Mr. andMrs. Ebert Mueller, is the only grandson ofMr. and Mrs. Staley. For that matter he isthe only grandchild of Mr. and Mrs. RobertMueller, so it is easy to see what an importantyoung man his relatives think him. This pic-ture was taken when he was three months old,but that was three months ago, so he is amuch bigger boy now. His mother was MissRuth Staley.

LEAVES FOR CANADAMrs. R. J. Mossner, who until Sept. 22

was Clara Bauer of the general officeforce, visited her friends at the Staleyplant Oct. 13. She called to tell us good-bye, for on the following day she andHer husband left for their new home inChampaign, Alberta, Canada.

Miss Bauer and Rev. Mr. Mossner weremarried in St. Paul's Lutheran church inDecatur, Sept. 22 and left immediately fora motor trip to Michigan. Later they re-turned to Decatur for a visit before goingon to Canada where Mr. Mossner has achurch.

Teacher "NameIkey "Nickles."

the five senses.

19

THE STXLEY JOURNAL

George Klein came to the company itOctober as chief operating engineer. Mr. Kleiucomes from St. Louis where he has had severalyears experience.

MELVIN LONGBONS TRANSFERREDMelvin Longbons has been transferred

from the auditing department to the gen-eral sales office. He has taken the posi-tion made vacant when John Warren wassent to the Chicago office.

Mr. Larsen's young son cut his chinrather badly when he fell on the steps ofthe Dennis school one morning in Octo-ber. While the injury was p a i n f u l , andthe sudden news of an injury to his sonalmost frightened our chief engineer todeath, the boy was able to return to schoolin the afternoon.

Durward Pygman spent a week of hisvacation in the mountains of southernIndiana, and claims that the climate thereagreed with him. As soon as he returnedto Decatur his throat trouble returned—climate again.

Art Harris's car was in the shop forrepairs for a day or so in October andconsequently Art couldn't go home forlunch. Each afternoon, then, he foundthe time dragging terribly, and made therest of the men in the drafting room greenwith envy talking about the good biscuitshis wife would have for dinner for him.

New EngineerOne of the newest members of the

Staley technical staff is George F. Klein,mechanical engineer, who took up hisduties at the plant Oct. 19. Mr. Klein isto be the chief operating engineer, aposition which his education and traininghas well fitted him to fill.

Mr. Klein was graduated from the Uni-versity of Missouri school of engineering.Since then he has had wide experience inthe operation and management of centralstations and district steam heating plants.He comes to the Staley company from theUnion Electric Light & Power Co., of St.Louis where for the last eight years hehad charge of central station work. Heis best known to the engineering worldthrough his work as mechanical super-intendent of the 300,000 K.W. Cahokiasuper-power station of the Union ElectricCo.

Mr. Klein is married and has two smallsons. He has taken a house in SummitAvenue, in Decatur, and has alreadyentered his children in the Dennis schoolhere.

Lucile Schulz, who worked in the salesdepartment once before, has returned andis working in Mr. Martin's office. We areglad she liked us well enough to return.

Robert Urfer, of the purchasing office,was called to Olney, 111., late in October,to attend the funeral of a relative.

Margery Robb, of the sewing room,visited in Arthur, 111., the first week inOctober to attend the Arthur fair and theSullivan-Arthur football game.

When Virgil Johnson made a hurriedtrip to Herrick, 111., and returned with adog, his friends believed the reports thathe is planning to spend most of the win-ter hunting.

Homer Rebmon of the pumping station,spent some time in Irving, 111., in October,settling up the estate of his father, whodied in August.

James, of the tin shop, said he was go-ing to get married, but he didn't. It issaid that he was too young.

One day, when it was simply pouringrain, George Long was whistling gaily, "ItAin't Coin' to Rain No More".

Margery Robb said that it wasn't be-cause she had lost all her money that shestayed over in Arthur a day longer.

20

THE STALEY JOURNAL

Service for ConfectionersOne of the latest additions to the staff

of Staley chemists is James J. Sleigh. Mr.Sleigh comes to the Staley company fromthe Franklin Sugar Refining Co., in Phil-adelphia, Pa., where he has been incharge of the service and research depart-ment. Through his work there he was intouch with a great number of manufac-turers throughout the United States whouse sugars, and he is recognized as anauthori ty on the proper sugars to use togive the best results, irrespective of thenature of the product.

His work with the Staley company wil!be of much the same nature, for here hewill be in charge of the confectioners'technical service department. He prob-ably will be at the plant most of the timefor the next few weeks, becoming ac-quainted, but within a short time he wil]start his "service" work. Practically allof his time will be given to manufacturerswho are interested in using Staley pro-ducts.

In his work Mr. Sleigh has made manywarm personal f r iends throughout themanufac tur ing world and many of thesehe will meet again when he starts in thisservice work here.

CHEMIST HONOREDG. E. Van Tromp Govier, textile

chemist at the plant, was in Septemberelected by the council to membership inthe Textile Institute of Breat Britain,which has recently been incorporated byRoyal charter. To be elected to member-ship one must have specialized in textilework for ten years, and write a thesis.

Fred Klumpp was having a wonderfultime the day some of his Staley friendssaw him west of Decatur. Fred was onhis vacation then, so it was all right forhim to be away from the mill house. Butwho would ever have thought that Fred,staid, silent Fred, would go joy ridingwith two girls in his car. But there hewas and he and the girls, especially theone in the front seat with Fred, seemed tobe enjoying themselves.

Three new men in the auditing de-partment are Clarence Walser, ClarenceConnelly and Gilbert Boren.

Just one thing keeps Ralph Fitch fromgoing hunting—that is the cold weather.As soon as it warms up he is going totake his gun and start out, he says.

Lawrence Skelling wants to know whypeople call him Uncle Newt,

James Sleigh is our new chemist, whoseduties will be that of technical expert. Mr.Sleigh has had several years experience in this

articular work and is a recognized authority.t may be of interest to know that Mr, Sleigh

is not married.

pIt

MR. STALEY BETTERMr. Staley returned to his office Oct. 20

after having been confined to his homefor several weeks, suffering with rheu-matism.

Flo Wheeler has recently taken theplace in No. 1 7 building office made va-cant when Frances Gladden left.

Mrs. Ray Judy, formerly MargaretLeaser, and her small daughter Patsy Ray,returned to their home in California inOctober after a six weeks' visit here withMrs. Judy's parents, Mr. and Mrs. LigeLeaser.

Chester—I think I'll have to start adrive to get me a new pair of pants. Dor-othy will you subscribe?

Dorothy—No, I think I will have tostart a drive for myself pretty soon.

Pat: "Say, Fred, when can I see thatnew baby of yours?"

Fred: "Come around about twoo'clock some morning, he has the mostpep then."

21

THE STALKY JOURNAL

DON'T DO THIS

Carl Oakes is willing, but he is a much better machinist than he is aneye specialist. Bill Stewart took a lot of chances when he asked a fellow-workman to take something out of his eye.

22

THE STALEY JOURNAL

GO TO THE NURSE

Mrs. -Chandler, our nurse, has the proper instruments and the propertraining. Her first aid room is easy to reach. She is the one to go towhen you get something in your eye.

23

THE STALET JOUKffAL

NEW EMPLOYMENT OFFICEW. L. Davis, who has recently taken

over the work of employment managerand personnel man, has the offices in thefirst floor of the main office building,formerly occupied by the traffic depart-ment.

Under the new arrangement Mr. Davisinterviews all applicants for work in theprocess and mechanical departments inthe plants.

First Eddie Koshinski admits -and thendenies that he is married to that good-looking girl he is seen with so often. Ifthey are in order we offer our congratu-lations.

Auditing department fr iends of RubyKeily say that they are going to help herbuy that fur coat after all. Ruby, beit known, was saving her money for sucha purpose when the bank in which shehad put all her faith and fortune, simplydied a sudden and expensive death. NowRuby is left shivering in a spring suit,with winter at the door. Pity the poorworking girl. Next time, she says, shewill patronize the August fur sales.

Robert Lester and Mary Ilia Powell are thechildren of Orville Powell of the feed house.Their grandfather is Bill Ooton, foreman in thefeed house.

Mr. Shinn, chemist, had had a longand, to him, tiresome talk with a booksalesman, but he was at loss to know howto get rid of the pest. "Finally", he says,"I risked insulting the man and 1 said,'Sir, the interview is closed'."

Dr. and Mrs. John Chamberlain, of Howard Sheets, of the packing house,Wyalusing, Pa., visited our general su- is greatly in demand as a teller of largeperintendent, G. E. Chamberlain and Mrs. pigeon stories lately.Chamberlain during October. Dr. Cham-berlain, who is Mr. Chamberlain's uncle,has visited in Decatur before, and hasmany fr iends at the Staley plant.

Doug Williams is not buying tobaccosince the World Series.

Louis Brand had a terrible time oneevening recently. He went for a rideALL ALONE in his nice new car, and outon the hard road jammed right into a bigtruck which was parked on the road buthad no lights, Louis says. Anyway, hiscar suffered but he got his pound offlesh.

Newt Simpson can't go near the reclam-ation plant any more since he caughtDoug with the snipes in his pocket.

Eva Leaser, of the grain department,had her vacation in October. Part of thetime she visited in Indianapolis and theremainder of the time she spent at homein Decatur.

The phone rang, Charley Fitch an-swered it, it was for him. "Another soulmade happy," said Turkey Grant.

CAPOKIE OF -

STOGIES

24

THE STALEY JOUHmt,

Do\vn on the beach, where they went to fish,these three boys surely did dress up. TedBelinski is the one in the big picture hat, SonnyMyers is the one in the middle and FrankSaloga is on the extreme right.

Have you noticed the checkered shirtwhich Spud Moran is wearing? Well hewon it in a cross word puzzle contest atthe Empress this fall.

Mable Payne, of Mr. Augur's office,took her vacation the last two weeks inSeptember.

After Herman Herberts, of the millhouse, lost his baseball bet he said onlysix words and, we are sorry to say, theycan't be printed. One hearing themmight have believed that Herman hadseen the famous war play, "What PriceGlo ry ?

Misery"I like the springtime.""Why>""Well, you see, I don't care for work

at any time, but it is only in the springthat the attitude gets any sympathy."—Boston Transcript.

Robert Walker, whom it seems, haslong had a desire to go to Alaska, hasabout completed arrangements for rent-ing an airplane and starting on the tripsoon. His friends all agree that the fallof the year is the time to make such atrip.

AUDITING DEPARTMENT BATPractically every man and girl in the

auditing department, and his husband andher wife, attended the annual party ofthat department Oct. 22. The partystarted off with a wiener roast in Nelsonpark. Two roaring fires served as thechief centers of interest around which thecrowd grouped itself and there roastedwieners and marshmallows and made cof-fee until the visible supply was exhausted.Then, when everyone had eaten until hewas well filled, Mrs. Ray Bass, wife of theassistant auditor, brought out a surprisein the form of a dozen golden pumpkinpies. To say that her surprise wasgreeted with shouting and thanks, is put-ting it mildly.

Af te r supper the crowd went on to theStaley club house where dancing and cardswere enjoyed the remainder of the even-ing.

Cap Morthland says that as a bassfisherman Mr. Chamberlain is a totalloss, but when he goes after croppie hegets em.

Bill Pollock (commenting upon thenumber of his men he had got to subscribeto the community chest) : "I've got allbut one to subscribe, and he's in the hos-pital."

The Boss: "I am afraid you are ignor-ing our efficiency systems, Jones."

Jones: "Perhaps so, sir, but somebodyhas to get the work done!"

THE P A R T I N & OFS H U B E R T >wAS VERV

- '

25

THE STALKY JOUIQML

Syl Ivens Takes a Vacation

Above—The open air theatre at Arlington, Va.

Above—At top of LookoutMountain.

Below—Interior of Washing-ton's church at Alexandria,Va.

Right—Syl is enjojying him-self at a family reunion.

Below—The porch of Mt.Vernon, Washington's home.

26

THE ST&LEY JOUl(NAJL

L. B. Humiston, our poetical friendfrom No. I 7 building, says he is dietingbut Henry Dubes says a better pronunci-ation is di-eating.

VC'hen all else fails Vivian and Margerymight succeed on the stage. They arebecoming quite famous as a song teamnow.

Mary Eloise Howley, small daughter ofJack Howley of the store room, has heardher father talk of Walter Morenz, mailtruck driver, and recently made his ac-quaintance. Walter made an impressionupon the young lady and she talked abouthim a lot to the family later. Only MaryEloise was unable to get his name just asit was spelled and insists upon calling him"Watermelon".

It is understood that the boys in thetime office and store room asked for twohours off one morning in September toattend the prayer-meeting in the VanHook home. It is hoped that the prayermeeting was not held there because ofany tendency which our Brother hasshown to fall from grace.

Fred Kessler recently took a bunch ofoffice girls to town one evening in his car,and got so interested in his passengersthat he forgot all boulevard stops.

Henry Potrafka has been quite ill withan infected eye for the last few weeks.

She Was a Live WireDick Dumbbell—When I read of the

wonderful inventions in electricity itmakes me think a little.

Miss Smart—Isn't it remarkable whatelectricity can do?

Jay Brown, of the table house, owns this cozy home in Terrace Gardens, 2182 Avery street.If you look closely you can see Jay himself on the porch.

27

THE STALEY JOU1QUU,

P. D. Rollins' Swan Song

Miss Kathryn DaySoon to Be Bride

Pretty Announcement PartyIt Given.

MawflBfiua, Oct. J.—A cliarralnnnouncement imny wa* slvui i

Hi* baauiifiil Wh*-f;*r Adams LI-JUIa.j«d«y af te i -uoon l.y Mr*. \Vayn

."**, existed by her »!itor -Mr

SWEDISH PRlNCEf••T ACCEPTED

t Rid of that Cough!

When the announcement of the engagement of P. D. Rallins andKathryn Day was published, P. D.'s friends posted it thus near his desk inthe traffic office. Even after that he slipped away and got married withoutinviting any of them.

28

THE STALEY JOURNAL

MASK. PARTYMr. and Mrs. Earl Stimmel entertained

at a masked party in the Staley club houseSaturday night Oct. 1 7. All of the guestscame in masks and fancy costumes. Theevening was spent in dancing and playinggames.

Robert Patton, store keeper, returnedOct. 1 9 from a two weeks vacation. Dur-ing his vacation Mr. Patton spent part ofhis time with relatives on a farm south ofDecatur.

L. M. Banning, of the time office, hadhis vacation the first two weeks inOctober. He had planned a motor tripfor part of the time but almost incessantrain caused him to change his plans andremain in Decatur.

Mrs. Ivens, wife of Syl Ivens of No. 1 7building, returned late in October froma two months' European trip. She madethe trip with her sister and niece, Mrs.Mueller-Blair and Miss Lenore Mueller, ofDecatur.

A Staley man, who had contributed tothe Community Chest, went home thatnight wearing the little button which waseiven to all contributors, and which read,"I have a heart". His five year old daugh-ter saw the button and asked what itsaid. When told she said:

"Well, Dad, don't they have any whichsay, 'I have a liver'?"

Ed Smith says that recently a man bythe same name as his, and from the samepart of Kentucky, applied for a job atthe Staley plant. After he was hired hegot into conversation with our friendlytime keeper, and asked who the presidentup here in Illinois was. Ed looked at hima moment then said:

"Why, Coolidge.""That's funny," the new Ed Smith re-

plied. "Coolidge is the name of thepresident down in Kentucky too."

GOLDEN WEDDINGMr. and Mrs. T. B. Hamilton celebrated

their golden wedding with a family partyin the Staley club house Oct. 4. Therewere 75 members of the family present,and Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton were pre-sented with fifty dollars in gold. Mr. andMrs. Hamilton are relatives of Mrs.Dickey, wife of Everett Dickey.

Vol—"I suppose you are saving for arainy day?"

Stead "No, but I've got twenty buckslaid by for a -wet night."

This is an engraver sidea of man's import-ance. The good lookingblond is Mrs. WalterMorenz. The tiny chapmight be Walt a f te r hiswife had given him agood talking to, but itreally is Walt when hewas a little boy. Nowhe's grown-up and drives the Staley mail truck.

Doug Williams claims that his wife hassome friends in the plant who keep herposted every day on what he does. Heinsists that during the World Series gameshe "went home one night and tossed hishat into the house. When it bouncedout again he decided to spend the night inCap Enlow's garage.

Several people from the plant and of-fices braved the weather Oct. 24 and wentto Champaign to attend the Universityof Illinois Homecoming, and especially tosee the Illinois-Michigan game.

Red Heddinger, of the laboratory, sayshe is proud of that new sweater he wearsfor when he bought it in paris (111.) thesalesman told him there was only oneother like it and the Prince of.Wales hadbought it.

29

THE STALE? JOURNAL

MONSKA-WALTENSEmily Monska and Arthur Waltens,

both of Decatur, were married in St.Johannes Lutheran church, Thursday,Oct. 15.

The bride has been working at theMueller factory. The bridegroom form-erly was a tinner at the Staley plant butfor the last two months has been em-ployed at the Nafziger Baking Company.He is a brother of Carl Waltens, of theaudi t ing deartment.

The couple are living in the 200 b'ockin Central avenue.

ANNOUNCE ENGAGEMENTAnnouncement has been made of the

approaching marriage of Dorsey E. Graggand Bernard H. Walker. The date setfor the marriage is Nov. 10.

Mr. Walker is in the auditing depart-ment and is well known about the officesand plant. He is the son of Mrs. Mar-garet Walker of Decatur. Miss Gragg isthe daughter of Mr. and Mrs. W. B.Gragg, of Decatur. She was graduatedfrom St. Theresa's Academy in June1925.

The wedding will take place in St.Thomass' Catholic church with LorrettaForan and Robert Tauber as the attend-ants.

Ed Borchers is cautioned to look to hislaurels. Jay Johnson is said to be a greatclock watcher.

If Staley's ever start a circus of theirown, Dan'l of the table house will be thefat lady.

Joe Rippie—"May 1 borrow your scis-sors?"

Mr. Galloway—"What's the matter?Doesn't your girl have bobbed hair?"

Joe "Sure she does. I'm going to thefootball game."

Some of Maggie Prell's friends haveabout decided that it is hardly safe forher to wander around by herself in someof the buildings, especially No. 10.

it seems rather needless to introduce you tothese two for everyone who has any connectionwith Staley s knows Red Thornborough andBoob Keck. As they say in the song, Boob isthe fat one and Red is the thin one. Youknow, of course, that Red has charge of thegarage and Boob is our master mechanic.When this picture was taken they were par-t icularly happy.

T. C. Burwell , our second vice-presidentand traffic manager, was the speaker atthe Decatur Kiwanis club luncheon meet-ing Oct. 27. Mr. Burwell spoke on "In-dustries Dependent Up'on Transportation.'The luncheon was in the Hotel Orlando.

Although he was a day late for theIllinois-Michigan game, Lloyd Spicer, ofNo. 1 7 building, says he thoroughly en-jojyed his visit at that sorority house atthe University of Illinois. He said it wasrather queer to be the only man amongso many girls, but they treated him fine.

GUSHARD PARTYGirls employed in Gushard's depart-

ment store gave an informal dance in theStaley club house Oct. 12. Marie Can-non, one of the girls, is a sister of ChesterCannon of the general offices.

Lately Ray Scherer has been blamingall of his woes on the long horse backrides he has been taking, but what aboutthat enlarged jaw. Did the horse kickhim in the face?

THE STALEY JOURNAL

Carl Russell Up in the Air

Left — Carl ready toleap.

Right — In the lucky"13" he flew at Ran-loul.

Below — One of thWorld Flight ships.

1 '.^.•

. •••••••••••••̂ ••••••••••̂ •••m^̂ H^HmHHBBK.1. ...

31

THE

tlrntha

FRED G. FERBERThe Staley company lost one of its

oldest employes when Fred G. Ferber diedsuddenly in his home Friday morning,Oct. 23. Mr. Ferber had been in fairlygood health and had been at work Thurs-day, but during the night he suffered astroke of apoplexy, and died at 6:30 inthe morning.

Mr. Ferber was born in Germany, Dec.26, 1859, and came to Decatur in 1887.Soon af ter his arrival here he was mar-ried to Miss Ottilia Schwalbe, and theyhave made Decatur their home ever since.

Soon after his arrival in Decatur Mr.Ferber went to work for the Wabash as ablacksmith, and he worked with that com-pany for twenty-four years.

Soon after the Staley factory wasopened in Decatur in 1910 Mr. Ferbercame here as blacksmith, and he has beenwith the company ever since. For thir-teen years he worked as blacksmith atthe plant, having an important part in thebuilding. About two years ago his eyesbegan troubling him, and he was trans-ferred to the reclamation department,where the work was less trying on them.

Mr. Ferber has been not only a faith-ful employe but a dependable one. Hehad hosts of friends, not only among theWabash and Staley employes but amongthe townspeople not connected with eitherplant. He was a member of St. Paul'sLutheran church.

Mr. Ferber leaves his widow and fivechildren, Mrs. C. R. Overly of Des Moines,Mrs. H. T. Moore of St. Louis, Fred W.Ferber of Chicago, Mrs. H. E. Crosby ofPittsburgh and Miss Mabel Ferber, wholives at home.

Funeral services were conducted fromSt. Paul's church, Oct. 26, with burialin Fairlawn cemetery.

MRS. ORA BREWERMrs. Ora Brewer, wife of Thomas J.

Brewer, of John White's gang, died in St.Mary's hospital Monday night, Oct. 19.She was born in Cumberland county andhad lived in Decatur twelve years. Shewas a member of the Grace Methodistchurch and of the Royal Neighbors.

Besides her husband Mrs. Brewer leavestwo daughters, Mrs. Ruth Annin and Mrs.Verna Keys, both of Decatur, her mother,Mrs. Nannie Scott, three brothers andthree sisters and two grand children.

Funeral services were conducted fromMoran's chapel Thursday afternoon, Oct.22.

MRS. NETTIE J. CASLEYMrs. Nettie J. Casley died in Kansas

City, Mo., Oct. 7 after a year's illness.At the time of her death she was makingher home with her son, Theron Casley,where she had lived for five years. Be-fore that, for twenty years, her home hadbeen in Decatur.

She was active in the work of the W.R. C. and the Eastern Star in Decatur,and had many friends here. Two of herthree sons, Harry J. and B. E. Casley,work at the Staley plant. Harry is fore-man at the corn elevator, and his brotherworks in the same department.

Harry Casley went to Kansas City whenhis mother died and returned to Decaturwith the funeral party. Funeral serviceswere conducted from the Grace Methodistchurch in Decatur, and burial was in De-catur.

LILLIAN MAE HARLESSAll Staley employes sympathized with

Frank Harless, fireman, and Mrs. Harless,when their daughter Lillian Mae, died Oct.12. The little girl, who was twelve and ahalf years old, was a victim of typhoidfever, and died in St. Mary's hospital afteran illness of several weeks.

She was born in Decatur, April 5, 1913and had made her home here always.She was a pupil in the H. B. Durfee schoolwhere she was well liked and was a bright,industrious pupil.

In addition to her parents she leavesthree sisters, Mrs. Pauline Chapman andMrs. Mildred Stickels of Decatur, and MissHelen Harless of Toledo, Ohio, and threebrothers, Clarence, Stanley and Donald,all of Decatur.

We wish to express our sincere thanksto tha different departments of the plantand to the Fellowship club for the aid andkindness, and beautiful flowers whichshowed their thoughtfulness during the ill-ness and at the death of our daughter andsister, Lillian Mae.

Mr. and Mrs. Frank Harless and family

32

THE STXLEY JOURNAL

WILLIAM WHITLEYWilliam Whitley, for some time janitor

in the manufacturing department offices,died in the state hospital in Jacksonville,Sept. 25. Bill, as everyone about theStaley plant knew him, had been ill forseveral months, being forced to give uphis work at the plant last April. Hehad been a patient at the hospital for fivemonths.

Bill came to the Staley plant in June,1919, first working in the yard. Aftera short time he was brought in to do thejanitor work in the manufactur ing offices,and served in that capacity until his lastillness.

He was born in Middletown, Tenn.,March 15, 1879, but had lived in Illi-nois much of his life. Before coming toDecatur he had lived in Taylorville, andboth there and in Decatur he worked ashouseman for several prominent familiesand he never tired of telling of the famouspeople he had served as guests in thesehomes.

Bill was prominent in the colored Ma-sonic lodge, being a member of DecaturLodge No. 17 A. F. & A. M., and St.Mary's chapter O. E. S. He was also amember of St. Peter's A. M. E. church.

He leaves his widow and one sister,Mrs. Letha Webb, of Hartville, Mo.

Friend of Christy MathewsonWhen news of the death of Christy

Mathewson reached Decatur, none felt theloss more keenly than Joe McGinnity, fam-ous Iron Man of baseball, who has forseveral years been with the Staley com-pany. Joe and Christy were both pitch-ing for the Giants when their friendshipstarted. For a time they were room-mates and they were always the closestof friends.

Joe is a man of the fewest possiblewords, and when he tries to tell how muchhe thought of his old team-mate, he saysvery little. But those of us who knowJoe know that that little means much.

"Christy was a prince—white as theymake 'em", is the way Joe sums it up.But that from Joe means a lot.

We wish to thank the yard men atStaley's for the beautiful flowers, andtheir sympathy and kindness shown usduring the illness and at the time of thedeath of our loved one.

T. J. Brewer and Daughters.

Someone has said that music is the lan-guage of love, but we can't believe it ofthe saxophone.—Des Moines Register.

Imogens Grolla gave a wonderful birthday party at the Pines to celebrate her birthdayOctober 1 7. Imogene is the little girl in the center, standing just behind the little boy. Mrs.Grolla, Imogene's mother, is at the extreme left at the rear. Of course the children had a won-derful time at the party playing kindergarten games. Imogene's cake with its birthday candleswas the high point on the table where refreshments were served. Ribbons stretched from thecenter of the table to each place and held the favors for the small guests,

33

THE STRLEY <JOUI{NAL

fornia.Bottom row, left t<>, right—Albert, his son Arthur, Mrs. Leaser, Mr. Leaser, Mont Leaser

carpenter at the Staley plant.Patsy Rae Judy is standing in front of her grandmother, and John Robert, son of Mr. and

Mrs. Jack Leaser, is standing in front of his grandfather.

CLUB MEETSThe In-for-Fun club met in the Staley

club house Oct. 7 with Mrs. Urfer, wife ofRobert Urfer of the purchasing office, ashostess. Husbands of the members werethe special guests. Dinner was served at7, and the remainder of the evening waspassed in dancing.

FAMILY PARTYW. R. Van Hook, of the store room,

and Mrs. Van Hook, entertained at a fam-ily party in the Staley club house Oct. I 1.Several members of the Van Hook familyfrom Decatur and Mt. Pulaski were theguests. A big chicken dinner was servedfollowed by dancing and cards.

It was rumored that when Paul White-man and his orchestra played in Decaturin October, Howard File sent a special re-quest to the management of the LincolnSquare theatre that the seats be removedand the audience be allowed to dance dur-ing the last half of the program. But,although Mr. Whiteman was willing, themanagement of the theatre said the thingwas impossible. So our chief chemist hadto enjoy his music in ordinary concertgoers style.

Have vou see our own Harold Lloyd?Yes, its Red Thornborough, but the newglasses were just what he needed to makehim as good as the best.

Announcement has been made of theapproaching marriage of Lloyd Spicer.So far the name of the girl has not beenannounced. *

Was She Right?Little Marion and her next door

neighbor, Donald, were engaged in an ab-sorb'ng conversation.

"What are anarchists?" asked littleMarion.

Then Donald swelled with wisdom."They want everything anyone else has

got, and they never wash themselves,"he replied.

"I see," said little Marion: "they is jestlittle boys growed up."

THE STALEY JOURNAL

\S NEW DAUGHTER

Mr. and Mrs. Ben J. Moody announcethe birth of a daughter, in St. Mary's hos-pital, Oct. 23. Mrs. Moody was formerlyEdna Coyle and until her marriage twoyears ago was the editor of The Journal.Her many Staley friends join in sendingher and her daughter heartiest congratu-lations and best wishes. The younglady's name is Barbara Susanna.

Born—To Mr. and Mrs. Harry Watson,Sept. 29, in the Decatur and MaconCounty Hospital, a daughter. She hasbeen named Barbara Jean. Mr. Watsonis a research chemist.

Born—To Mr. and Mrs. George Sheu-maker, Sept. 26, a daughter. She hasbeen named Alice Lorraine. Mr. Sheu-maker works on No. 1 7 loading gang.

Gene Morrow may lead a hard life, dealingas he does with bricks and plaster, but thisbright-eyed little doll goes a long way to mak-ing things softer for him. For she is JoanElizabeth Morrow, Gene's grand-daughter. Herfather, William Morrow, is his father's right-hand man at the plant. So it is quite a familyaffair-

This picture of this happy li t t le chap mighthave been taken just anywhere but it happensthat it was taken at the seaside in Holland.And the sturdy little fellow in the picture isHarald de Miranda, the four year old son ofMr. and Mrs. Jack Miranda, of Amsterdam.Mr. Miranda visited us in September and lef twith us this charming picture of his son. Mr.Miranda is associated with Cardoza & Boek-man, our Amsterdam brokers.

Upon being informed by Luther Humis-ton that the gases which soar upwardfrom the great smoke stacks were heavilyladen with alcohol, Frank McCann re-plied: "1 suppose that is the reasoneverybody wants to go to Heaven. Andif this is true I would not object much togoing there myself."

Three new people in the sales depart-ment are Mary Heffernan, Margaret Dick-inson and Harry Eppstine.

Mrs. Bertha Chandler, our nurse, visitedher niece, Tillie Chandler, the week endof Oct. 24. Tillie is a student nurse atBurnham hospital in Champaign, 111.

Mrs. John Warren, of Chicago, visitedher mother, Mrs. F. J. Hodgins, in Octo-ber.

Frank Rucker went fishing and caughta lot of baas but by the time he reachedhome they had turned to red horse andhickory shad.

We wish to extend our heartfelt thanksto the Staley people who showed suchgreat thoughtfulness and kindness at thetime of the death of our mother.

Children of Mrs. Nettie Casley.

THE STXLEY JOURNAL

Although he looks altogether pleasing in thispicture, no camera can half tell of the charmsof John Benny Longbons. He is the fivemonths old son of Mr. and Mrs. Tom Long-bons. His father works in the Staley auditingdepartment and John Benny made his debutinto Staley society when he appeared at therecent auditing department party.

ENTERTAIN AT CLUBNellie and Charley Hughes entertained

at the club house Friday night, Oct. 23.The affair was a Hallowe'en masquerade.Sixteen couples were present, and spentthe evening dancing. At a late hour re-freshments of pumpkin pie and chocolatewere served.

Mildred Simonds has recently beenadded to the staff of the cost accountingdivision.

It is supposed that Henninger, of thelaboratory was invited to the party at theNurses' home because his friends callhim "Doc."

SEWINC, CLUB MEETSMrs. L. C. Waltens, mother of Carl

Waltens of the auditing department, en-tertained her sewing club in the Staleyclub house Oct. 8. Several women fromLincoln, 111., members of a club there,were guests at the meeting.

Lamb's TalesCharles Lamb had no patience with

prudery. Some small boys were enjoyinga swim when he chanced to pass that waywith a very prim lady.

"Isn't that shocking, Mr. Lamb?" shesaid, "to see those little boys in bathingwithout any clothes?"

Lamb peered in their direction. "ReallyMadam," he said, "until you called myattention to it I wasn't sure whether theywere little bovs or little girls."—Dart-mouth Jack o'Lantern.

We are not going to tell you who this charm-ing child is, but are leaving it to your ownimagination. We will say that he is a prom-inent Staley employe, one you all know andlike, and who has lived in Decatur all of hislife. He is a grandfather now, but he hasn'tlost his good looks.

Guess who he is and send your guess into The Journal office. Next month we willpublish the correct name along with the listof guesses. We are willing to bet that noneof you will recognize him.

WIENER ROASTAll of the girls in the sales department

joined in a wiener roast Oct. 20. Thegirls went out to Nelson Park, after theoffice closed, and there had a grand timecooking the festive wieners over a firewhich finally did roar.

From present indications the office atNo. 1 7 is soon to be turned into a zoo.

Excitement was rife in the tray roomone evening in October. When the girlsstarted home they found that it was rain-ing and there was a wild scramble forumbrellas. Mrs. Facius especially scram-bled but she couldn't find her's. Sheasked several girls if they had seen it,and made quite a commotion, when someone turned and looked at her and therethe umbrella was hanging by the strap toher arm.

Mr. and Mrs. R. O. Augur spent thesecond week of their vacation, the latterpart of October, visiting friends in St.Louis. —

'Tis said that Scotchmen don't like rub-ber heels because they give a little.

THE STALKY JOURNAL

When Loretta Broadbear celebrated her fifth birthday she entertained her small friends ata party in the Pines, This picture was taken while they were at the table where the refresh-ments were served. Loretta is the daughter of W. H. Broadbear, foreman of the electricians,and Mrs. Broadbear. From the center, front, around to the left the children are: Ella Bar ski,Violette and Loretta Broadbear, Imogene Grolla, June Margaret Slavis, Helen Hupp, Jack Osborn,Madeline Weisley, Darel Jean Sherman, Henry White, Jean Connard, Beverly Bowman, JackPotrafka, June Krumsiek, Ruth Hill, Edwin Yatsko, Tommy Stephens, Betty Jane Smith, GeorgeJacobs, Dorothy Jean Anderson, James Potters, Margaret Knorr, Catherine Songer, Billy Ander-son, Junior Bryan, Betty Lee Stewart, Robert Lewis Lowe.

And could you call a girl who sits upand eats a big box of candy on you astuffed date? O. P. News.

Julius Grabenhofer has been transferredto the auditing department.

It isn't often that we catch our chief engineer, Mr. Larsen, napping, but we certainly caughthim at it one noon. He must have had a most satisfying lunch just before he took hia napfor the click of the camera did not disturb him.

37

7HE STALEY JOURNAL

Frank Shields, at the age of 16, was one ofthese heart-breakers one reads about. Pleasetake special note of the side burns, the carelessattitude and the arm chair. That arm chairlooks as if it would be more comfortable tolean upon than to sit on. Frank is now one ofStaley's fa i th fu l employes.

GAVE A DANCEMr. and Mrs. Robert Fields entertained

a number of friends at a dance in theStaley club house Oct. 9.

"Dad" Gentry says he knows by ex-perience that it is safer to stay at theplant and work than it is to stay at home,on the day the family is moving. He re-cently moved to Second street, betweenWilliam and Prairie.

Mrs. Stewart, wife of William Stewart,machinist, is still a patient in the Decaturand Macon County hospital, although sheis showing a slight improvement now.Mrs. Stewart underwent an operation sev-eral weeks ago and has been quite ill eversince.

AN OLD SOLDIERAlthough you probably never suspected

it, Bob Sattley, our far-famed restaurantkeeper, is an old soldier. At any ratehe is old enough to get a pension, andwhat is more to the point, he is gettingthat pension.

It's this way back in the days of nor-mal waist lines and horse drawn buggies,young Sattley enlisted as a soldier in Un-cle Sam's army, and the first thing heknew somebody started a war off in Cuba.Bob shouldered his gun and marched offand served like a good fellow.

Then, as if that was not enough, he en-listed again, and again his Uncle sent himoverseas with his gun-—this time to quietthe uprising in the Philippine Islands. Inboth campaigns he saw lively service, butwhen his enlistment was over he retiredto civilian life.

If he had stayed on in the army it is al-together probable that he would haveseen even livelier service for his com-manding officer was one of the men sentto quell the Boxers in China, and laterwas overseas during the recent WorldWar.

But Bob did his bit, we all know that,and now, after so long a time, the gov-ernment has recognized his service byadding him to the list of Spanish Warpensioners.

Henry Dubes invited the gang to achicken fry and then asked them to payfor their own meals.

To QE F O U N D AT\ THE MAcoN Co

-~^

w ALTER MOPENZIS SAlO To HAVE

38

THE STRLEY JOUIQMl,

ALL T?i&HT CAP '\R -THIS )

V A I N T COSTING /

TAKE YOURT'ME GEORG-E

DON'T GETE X C I T E D - ,

HAS AM ABLE |\Ass.STANT fT y y

^ LteO.'0GEO LI:ONARD.Cl[1° &

TAKE MOTOR TRIPC. E. Goodman, watchman, and Mrs.

Goodman, and their daughter Viola Good-man of the purchasing office took an ex-tended motor trip during their vacationin October. Their goal was Huntington,W. Va., "where they visited with relatives.They also visited several other places inOhio and West Virginia before re turninghome.

Joe Kanariem asked Turkey Grant tohelp him find his dinner bucket and thefirst one they asked was Doug William.

One night in October the geese flyingsouth over Decatur made so much noisethat Glen Dash thought he was being heldup, and rushed out in his night clothes,with a gun to defend his home. He fol-lowed the geese to the south side of thelake but couldn't bring them down.

HALLOWE'EN PARTYMrs. Gertrude Knapp, of the tray room,

and her sister, Mrs. Price, entertainedsixty of their friends at a party in theclub house on the evening of Oct. 24.Practically all of the guests were masked,and the decorations, in orange and black,carried out the Hallowe'en idea.

The prize for the prettiest costumewent to Bernice Sawyer, who was dressedas a gypsy, and Mrs. Maude Harlowe wasselected as wearing the most comical cos-tume. Mrs. Wright wore the most per-fect disguise for no one recognized her.

During the even'.ng the guests had theirfor tune told, played Hallowe'en games anddanced. Supper "was served late in theevening. ,

Since George Coles has had so muchtrouble with his slack tub, he has gottena higher one. Now if he wants to fallin it he will have to get a ladder first.

HALLOWE'EN PARTYFred Rucker, son of Frank Rucker of

No. 1 7 build ng, entertained a number ofhis university f r iends at a Hallowe enparty in the Staley club house Oct. 2 1 .The guests masked and came in fancycostumes.

The boys of No. 1 7 building want toknow why Bob Fields and Fred Stonenever sing any more.

Walter Knackamuhs, of No. 1 7 build-ing, has missed two Saturday nights atthe; East Will-am Street movie theatre, andthe management has sent out an S. O. S.

I Hear in the Moon\t Henry Dubes says never again will I volunteer as a taxi driver for the A. E. Staley

Mfg. Company.That the company's car was in the repair shop and the hour midnight and Henry

promised Bill Morrison he would take Kokendorfer to the pumping station.That Henry's adventure ended after a gruff voice in the back seat of his car ordered

him to drive to West Main Street and informed the indignant Henry the taxiservice was as slow as the Missouri mule.

That Herman Herbert makes good use of the Holy Bible Henry Dubes gave him twoyears ago.

That every night before he goes to bed he reads a verse or two and prays that all hisenemies be forgiven with the exception of Ed Borchers.

That Borchers is Herman's pet aversion, yet he has been trying hard to forgive andforget him, but has failed so far.

That Shelbyville, the birthplace of Joe Kanarian and Buster Woodworth, will be ac-cessible to tourists this coming winter.

That Joe's home town was the ancient capital city of the cave men so Kanarian claims.That north and south of that beautiful city there are hills and valleys, byways and

highways accessible only to goats and Fords.

That Miss Goodman is back again, hale and hearty, after spending two weeks' vaca-tion in the sunny south.

That she admits failing to capture a Kentucky Colonel, but reports having had aglorious vacation.

That after returning to work, she was very anxious to know how much money FredKlumpp lost in the bank failure.

That John Kuhns says the greatest thrill he got in the Illinois-Michigan game waswhen the band played "We are Loyal to you, Illinois."

That the game itself was in doubt until the whistle blew ending the hostilities.That Red Grange was the hero. He gained more ground than any other player and

John wants to tell the world he is loyal to Illinois.

That Howard File is posing as an authority on tees and holes, doglegs and hazards.That the ancient game of golf is becoming very popular with the highbrows and their

followers.That Howard says the Park Board should build a rest room close to the ninth green as

the shady bowers are too conspicuous.

Yours truly,

THE MAN IN THE MOON.

''S

E R SBY FAST MAIL AND TELEGRAPH

Water at North—Pkone M. 531

While in Chicago with his Kansas Cityfootball team recently Jack M.ntun calledon his old friend, and former Staley base-ball player, Windy Lotshaw. Windy isnow trainer for the Cubs and travels abouta lot with his team, but he doesn't forgethis old Staley friends.

When Jack arrived Windy invited himin and then said, "Say, Jack, I want toshow you something."

He took Jack into the next room wherea big green parrot was sitting in a cagetalking incessantly.

"Some parrot," said Jack. "What doyou call him?"

"Well," said Windy, "I call that par-rot Avery after my old friend Avery Mc-Glade."

"You call the parrot after Avery Mc-Glade? What do you do that for?"

"Because," said Windy, "the parrotnever stops talking."

He: "I couldn't take you to dinnerlast night because circumstances overwhich I have no control prevent it."

She: "What a funny name to call yourwife."

Charlie: "Please reconsider, Helen.If you don't, I swear I'll blow my brainsout."

Helen: "Oh, that would be a goodjoke on dad. He thinks you haven'tany."

It was during the impaneling of a jurythe following colloquy occurred:

"You are a property holder?""Yes, your honor.""Married or single?""I have been married for five years,

your honor.""Have you formed or expressed an

opin-on? ""Not for five years, your honor.".—

Sovereign Visitor.

Experimenting"When the eyes are shut, the hearing

becomes more acute," says a medicalauthority.

A lot of people try this experiment inchurch.

Everything ClearTeacher: "Johnnie, what are the two

genders?"Johnny: "Masculine and feminine.

The masculines are divided in temperateand intemperate and the feminines intofrigid and torrid."

DizzyrhythmicsA pert protozoa yclept PhyllisRemarked to a microbe named Willis:

"Don't call me a germ,"Invisible worm

My dad was a deadly bacillus."—A. L. L. in Judge.

Bill: "Say, Foley is a little dumb."Ed: "How so?"Bill: "He went out with me the other

night and I told him it was going to be awet party."

Ed: "Yes."Bill: "Well, the dumbbell brought an

umbrella."

Give "em TimeA peach came walking down the street;

She was more than passing fair;A smile, a nod, a half-closed eye,

And the peach became a pair. Medley.

Sez Who?There's many a man can be happy and

gay.With a lass, and a glass, and a song:But the man that's worth while,Is the one that can smile,When he's got the old lady along.

Spruce Splinters.

Very SimpleLittle Girl (to grandfather) :

pa, why don't you grow hairhead?"

Grandpa: "Well, why doesn'tgrow on a busy street?"

Little Girl: "Oh, I see; it can't get upthrough the concrete." - Contributed.

"Grandon your

grass

Well, when at last Ford has all themoney we can u?e Ford parts PS a mediumof exchange. Associated Editors (Chi-cago).

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SureIt doesn't do a bit of harm to grin;

It never causes much alarm to smile;Men have been known to laugh while at

their work, yet win—-With cheerfulness to do their tasks, nor

shirk the while.So, if you like your job—

As you pursue it—•And feel like smiling

Why, my boy, go to i t fB. A. A. Bulletin.

Advertisers

There s a Good Reason for Insisting On

LAR BUTTEand

POLAR BUTTERMILKThey re Better

Cause and EffectThe little four-year-old girl came in

crying. "Gammie," she said, holding outa chubby little arm in which teeth markswere plainly visible. "Teddy bit me."

Teddy was the little boy who lived nextdoor. Usually he was a quiet well be-haved little fellow, but incidents like thishad happened so often that "Gammie"was losing patience.

"Look here," she said. "You are justas big and strong as Teddy, "when yousee he is going to hit you or bite you, youhit him first."

The tear filled eyes grew bigger andbrighter. "But, Gammie, I did. I sockedhim on the head with a tire before hebit me."

No Eggsplanations Necessary

A sign displayed in front of a churchreads: "The Rev. Rastus Jones will preachhere Sunday morninc; and even ;ng; afterwhich the church w'll be closed for neces-sary repairs."—Juggler.

Visitor: "I hear you've lost your par-rot that used to swear so terribly."

Hostess: "Yes, poor dear, we foundhim dead on the golf links."

Tourist: "But what do you do herewhen you're lonely?"

Mountaineer: "Oh, I shoot at ol' BillScroggins down in the valley."

Engine Driver's Sweetheart: "And,do you always think of me during yourlonq night trips?"

Engine Driver: "Do I? Whv, I'vewrecked two trains that way already."

Engine Driver's Sweetheart: "Oh, youdarling!"

"What do you do when you arekissed?"

"I veil.""WouH you yell if I kissed you?""No, I'm still hoarse f rom last n'firht."

"It's a Young Man's Game"(From Elmira (N. Y.) Star-Gazette)M— G. G , 19, veteran newspaper

and advertising executive, died at hishome at Flushing, L. I.

Extra! Army Invades Fijis!

(From McAlester (Okla.) News Capital)The order states that hats and shirts

will be the only uniform necessary.

The Star Witness"Look here, chief," demanded the cap-

tain of the tramp steamer, "what becameof that missionary I put ashore here aboutsix months ago?"

"I refuse to answer, by advise of coun-sel," replied the cannibal chief, "but Idon't mind telling you that there's noth-ing in the theory that you can't keep agood man down."

Explained at LastAn exceptionally dull speech had been

made, but the diners broke into the cus-tomary hand-clapping.

"Why, the dickens do they always ap-plaud a thing like that?" growled a vet-eran banqueteer.

"Oh," replied his table neighbor,"that's to give the fellows whose cigarshave gone out a chance to light up with-out making a noise."

"Every time I take castor oil, motherputs five sentimes in my money box."

"And when your money box is fu l l?""She b'tys a new bottle of castor oil!Pele Mele (Paris).

"And how are you I'ttle gentlemen en-loyinq; the picture exhibit?"

"Rotten! There ain't no jokes underany of 'em!"

The man f rom Texas put awav hisgun and steeped over the body: "Thereare some th:n»s," he said, "I don't allow.Plavintr three aces when I only dealt himtwo just gets my goat.

Patronize GUI' Advertisers42

WHICH ARE YOU?There are two kinds of people on earth

today,Just two kinds of people—no more I say.

Not the sinner and saint, for 'tis well un-derstoond

The good are half bad and the bad arehalf good.

Not the rich or the poor, for to count aman's wealth

You must first know the state of his con-science and health.

Not the humble and proud, for in life'slittle span

Who puts on vain airs is not counted aman.

Not the happy and sad, for the swift flyingyears

James JJ* IVloranFor Ambulance

Service

Telephone Main 577

Cor. \Vater and Eldorado Streets

Heartless WretchWife: "You don't love me any more.

Bring each man his laughter and each man I'm _going into the garden to have a goodhis tears.

No; the kind of people on earth 1 meanAre the people who lift and the people

who lean.Wherever you go you will find the world's

masses

cry.Hubby: "If you really mean that,

Phyllis, go and cry over the roses. Theyneed watering."

"I want some intelligent men as hospi-tal orderlies," announced Lieut. Worley.

Are always divided in just these two "Any pharmacists in the company?"classes.

And, oddly enough, you will find, too, 1ween.

There is only one lifter to twenty wholean.

In which class are you? Are you easingthe load

Of overtaxed lifters who toil down theroad?

Or are you the leaner, who lets othersbear

Your portion of labor and worry and

—Ella Wheeler Wilcox.

A flaxen-haired individual shuffled forward.

*'Ye gods," said the lieutenant, "are youa pharmacist?"

"Sure ay bane pharmersis," was the in-dignant reply. **Vy, ay bane work onpharm all mae life."

Joan: "Mummy, was baby sent downfrom heaven?"

Mother: "Yes, dear."Joan: "They like to have it quiet up

there, don't they?" Belle Hop.

Unfair"Didn't your daughter pass her exam-

ination?"

An old colored man attended a moviffor the first time. When he came out hewas asked:

"Well, uncle, did you enoy the pic-ture?"

"Oh, yes," he replied, "the picture was"No. Why, the examiners asked her all right, but the piano made so much

questions about things which happened no;ge ] couldn't hear a word they said."before she was born!" Pele Mele. —Exchange.

Two negro teamsters were arguing asto how long crapshooting had been apopular pastime in certain circles. "Ahtell yuh hit was invented in the Spanish-American War," insisted Moses.

"Niggah, yoh ig-ranee am shocking,"declared Rastus. "A man wrote a bookcalled 'Pair o* Dice Lost* befo* GawgeWashington was bawn!"— Ex.

Still, if you* slow down to enjoy tht-scenery, pass-ne; cars w 11 make you eatit. Quincy-Whig-Journal.

Officer: "Eyes, r'p^ht!"Negro Private: "Who's right?"Negro Serg.: "Shet up, nigger, he's

right."

"I see Zeke is packing two guns these I'm going to quit being a hold-updays." I'll hang 'round these joints no more,"

"Yeh—aorta dressed to kill, as the fel- Thus sooke the garterslers say.* As they fell upon the floor.

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Stop, Look, Listen

He was speeding in his flivver,Rushing eastward by the river,He was giving lurching lizzie all

The gas that he could give her;Till he jammed upon the brake,Making lizzie snort and shake,But the train came roaring on him;

He had made his last mistake.

He got stalled upon the track;Hadn't time to start or back,

So he made heroic efforts toAbandon his old hack.

All too soon he breathed his last,For the train was much too fast;He was greeting old St. Peter by

The time three coaches passed.

Never more he'll speed his flivver,Urge it eastward by the r iver;Never more will he give lizzie all

The gas that he can give her;After he was struck that day,He soon STOPPED, but people sayThat he'll never LOOK and LISTEN

'Cause he's too darned far away.

We thank you!The Exhaust.

Greek: "1 dreamed last night I was aking, so the first thing this morning I wentto the dentist."

Sharp: "What for?"Greek: "I wanted to get a crown.

Property Manager (to villain) : "Say,take those off. Those aren't your whisk-ers."

Villain: "What are they?"P. M.: "They're one of the costumes

for the Hawaiian chorus."

Finkelstein was a good customer of Abeand Mawruss, manufacturers of ladies'dresses. He was, however, getting laxabout his payment of invoices, and Abesuggested that Mawruss write him a strongbut diplomatic letter calling his attentionto this laxity.

Mawruss worked for several hours overthe letter, then showed it to Abe for hisapproval. After reading it over carefully,Abe said: "By golly, dot's a vonderfulletter. Strong und to der point, aber notpersonal or insulting. But you got acouple mistakes in it, Mawruss. 'Dirty'you should spell mil only vun V und'cockroach' begins mit a 'c.' "—Chester-field in A Line O' Type.

Johnnie (to new visitor) : "So youare my grandma, are you?"

Grandmother: "Yes, Johnnie, I'myour grandma on your father 's side."Johnnie: "Well, you're on the wrongside: you'll soon find that out.'

Heard in the Employment OfficeQuestion: "Now, Tony, what did you

do before you came to Allentown?"Answer: "Vy, 1 work."Q. "I know, but what at?"A. "At a bench."J. "Where did you work at a bench?"A. "In a factory."Q. "What kind of a factory?"A. ^Brick."Q. "You made bricks?"A. "No, de factory is made of bricks."Q. "Now, Tony, listen; what did you

make in the factory?"A. "Twenty dollars a week."Q. "No, no I What does the factory

make?"A. "I dunno. Lots of money, 1

guess."Q. "Now, Tony, listen; what kind of

goods did the factory produce?"A. "Oh, good goods."Q. "I know, but what kind of good

goods?"A. "De best."Q. "The best of what?"A. "The best dere is."Q. "Of what?"A. "Of dose goods."Q. "Oh, what's the use?"A. "I dunno; maybe you got a job

in de office for me, huh?" Mack Bull-dog.

Fair QuestionLawyer (to flustered witness) Now,

sir, did you or did you not on the datein question, or at any other time, sayto the defendant or any one else thatthe statement imputed to you and deniedby the plaintiff was a matter of no mo-ment or otherwise—answer me, yes orno?

Bewildered Witness Yes or no what?

Raw! Raw! Raw!The rookie had lately joined a crack

cavalry outfit, and after several imitationsof the Prince of Wales had lost some ofhis exuberance. He was standing on thesunny side of the canteen looking likethe spirit of melancholy when the genialchaplain approached.

"What's the matter, my boy?" askedthe chaplain. "Homesick?"

"Oh, a little I guess," was the answer."You see, I'm just a raNv recruit."

"Cheer up, you'll be all right. Butyou shouldn't say "raw recruit.' The'raw' is superfluous."

The rookie rubbed his anatomy reflec-tively and then replied with sad emphasis:

"Not when you join the cavalry."—American Legion Weekly.

Small Boy: "Me fadder wants a nickel'swort' of ice cream."

Soda Clerk: "Cone?"Small Boy: "Naw, Rosenbaum."

- also Aenthol Cough Dropsin the orange-colored box

Keepyour throatcomfortableand voiceclear

SMITH BROTHERSFAMOUS SINCE 1847

REVIEW PRESSTRADE NAME SINCE 1888

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