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OtherbooksbyRoaldDahl
THEBFG
BOY:TALESOFCHILDHOOD
BOYandGOINGSOLO
CHARLIEANDTHECHOCOLATEFACTORY
CHARLIEANDTHEGREATGLASSELEVATOR
THECOMPLETEADVENTURESOFCHARLIEANDMRWILLYWONKA
DANNYTHECHAMPIONOFTHEWORLD
GEORGE’SMARVELLOUSMEDICINE
GOINGSOLO
MATILDA
THEWITCHES
Foryoungerreaders
THEENORMOUSCROCODILE
ESIOTROT
FANTASTICMRFOX
THEGIRAFFEANDTHEPELLYANDME
THEMAGICFINGER
THETWITS
Picturebooks
DIRTYBEASTS(withQuentinBlake)
THEENORMOUSCROCODILE(withQuentinBlake)
THEGIRAFFEANDTHEPELLYANDME(withQuentinBlake)
THEMINPINS(withPatrickBenson)
REVOLTINGRHYMES(withQuentinBlake)
Plays
THEBFG:PLAYSFORCHILDREN(AdaptedbyDavidWood)
CHARLIEANDTHECHOCOLATEFACTORY:APLAY(AdaptedbyRichardGeorge)
FANTASTICMRFOX:APLAY(AdaptedbySallyReid)
JAMESANDTHEGIANTPEACH:APLAY(AdaptedbyRichardGeorge)
THETWITS:PLAYSFORCHILDREN(AdaptedbyDavidWood)
THEWITCHES:PLAYSFORCHILDREN(AdaptedbyDavidWood)
Teenagefiction
THEGREATAUTOMATICGRAMMATIZATORANDOTHERSTORIES
RHYMESTEW
SKINANDOTHERSTORIES
THEVICAROFNIBBLESWICKE
THEWONDERFULSTORYOFHENRYSUGARANDSIXMORE
RoaldDahl
JamesandtheGiantPeach
illustratedby
QuentinBlake
PUFFIN
PUFFINBOOKS
PublishedbythePenguinGroup
PenguinBooksLtd,80Strand,LondonWC2R0RL,England
PenguinGroup(USA)Inc.,375HudsonStreet,NewYork,NewYork10014,USA
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PenguinBooksLtd,RegisteredOffices:80Strand,LondonWC2R0RL,England
puffinbooks.com
FirstpublishedintheUSA1961
PublishedinGreatBritainbyGeorgeAllen&Unwin1967
PublishedinPuffinBooks1973
eissuedwithnewillustrations1995
Thiseditionpublished2007
2
Textcopyright©RoaldDahlNomineeLtd,1961
Illustrationscopyright©QuentinBlake,1995
Allrightsreserved
Themoralrightoftheauthorhasbeenasserted
ExceptintheUnitedStatesofAmerica,thisbookissoldsubjecttotheconditionthatitshallnot,bywayoftradeorotherwise,belent,re-sold,hiredout,orotherwisecirculatedwithoutthepublisher’spriorconsentinanyformofbindingorcoverotherthanthatinwhichitis
publishedandwithoutasimilarconditionincludingthisconditionbeingimposedonthe
subsequentpurchaser
BritishLibraryCataloguinginPublicationData
ACIPcataloguerecordforthisbookisavailablefromtheBritishLibrary
ISBN:978-0-14-192987-3
ThisbookisforOliviaandTessa
One
Untilhewasfouryearsold,JamesHenryTrotterhadahappylife.Helivedpeacefullywithhismotherandfatherinabeautifulhousebesidethesea.Therewerealwaysplentyofotherchildrenforhimtoplaywith,andtherewasthesandybeachforhimtorunabouton,andtheoceantopaddlein.Itwastheperfectlifeforasmallboy.
Then,oneday,James’smotherandfatherwenttoLondontodosomeshopping,andthereaterriblethinghappened.Bothofthemsuddenlygoteatenup(infulldaylight,mindyou,andonacrowdedstreet)byanenormousangryrhinoceroswhichhadescapedfromtheLondonZoo.
Nowthis,asyoucanwellimagine,wasarathernastyexperiencefortwosuchgentleparents.ButinthelongrunitwasfarnastierforJamesthanitwasforthem.Theirtroubleswerealloverinajiffy.Theyweredeadandgoneinthirty-fivesecondsflat.PoorJames,ontheotherhand,wasstillverymuchalive,andallatoncehefoundhimselfaloneandfrightenedinavastunfriendlyworld.Thelovelyhousebytheseasidehadtobesoldimmediately,andthelittleboy,carryingnothingbutasmallsuitcasecontainingapairofpyjamasandatoothbrush,wassentawaytolivewithhistwoaunts.
TheirnameswereAuntSpongeandAuntSpiker,andIamsorrytosaythattheywerebothreallyhorriblepeople.Theywereselfishandlazyandcruel,andrightfromthebeginningtheystartedbeatingpoorJamesforalmostnoreasonatall.Theynevercalledhimbyhisrealname,butalwaysreferredtohimas‘youdisgustinglittlebeast’or‘youfilthynuisance’or‘youmiserablecreature’,andtheycertainly
nevergavehimanytoystoplaywithoranypicturebookstolookat.Hisroomwasasbareasaprisoncell.
Theylived–AuntSponge,AuntSpiker,andnowJamesaswell–inaqueerramshacklehouseonthetopofahighhillinthesouthofEngland.ThehillwassohighthatfromalmostanywhereinthegardenJamescouldlookdownandseeformilesandmilesacrossamarvellouslandscapeofwoodsandfields;andonaveryclearday,ifhelookedintherightdirection,hecouldseeatinygreydotfarawayonthehorizon,whichwasthehousethatheusedtoliveinwithhisbelovedmotherandfather.Andjustbeyondthat,hecouldseetheoceanitself–alongthinstreakofblackish-blue,likealineofink,beneaththerimofthesky.
ButJameswasneverallowedtogodownoffthetopofthathill.NeitherAuntSpongenorAuntSpikercouldeverbebotheredtotakehimoutherself,notevenforasmallwalkorapicnic,andhecertainlywasn’tpermittedtogoalone.‘Thenastylittlebeastwillonlygetintomischiefifhegoesoutofthegarden,’AuntSpikerhadsaid.Andterriblepunishmentswerepromisedhim,suchasbeinglockedupin
thecellarwiththeratsforaweek,ifheevensomuchasdaredtoclimboverthefence.
Thegarden,whichcoveredthewholeofthetopofthehill,waslargeanddesolate,andtheonlytreeintheentireplace(apartfromaclumpofdirtyoldlaurelbushesatthefarend)wasanancientpeachtreethatnevergaveanypeaches.Therewasnoswing,noseesaw,nosandpit,andnootherchildrenwereeverinvitedtocomeupthehilltoplaywithpoorJames.Therewasn’tsomuchasadogoracataroundtokeephimcompany.Andastimewenton,hebecamesadderandsadder,andmoreandmorelonely,andheusedtospendhourseverydaystandingatthebottomofthegarden,gazingwistfullyatthelovelybutforbiddenworldofwoodsandfieldsandoceanthatwasspreadoutbelowhimlikeamagiccarpet.
Two
AfterJamesHenryTrotterhadbeenlivingwithhisauntsforthreewholeyearstherecameamorningwhensomethingratherpeculiarhappenedtohim.Andthisthing,whichasIsaywasonlyratherpeculiar,sooncausedasecondthingtohappenwhichwasverypeculiar.Andthentheverypeculiarthing,initsownturn,causedareallyfantasticallypeculiarthingtooccur.
Itallstartedonablazinghotdayinthemiddleofsummer.AuntSponge,AuntSpikerandJameswerealloutinthegarden.Jameshadbeenputtowork,asusual.Thistimehewaschoppingwoodforthekitchenstove.AuntSpongeandAuntSpikerweresittingcomfortablyindeck-chairsnearby,sippingtallglassesoffizzylemonadeandwatchinghimtoseethathedidn’tstopworkforonemoment.
AuntSpongewasenormouslyfatandveryshort.Shehadsmallpiggyeyes,asunkenmouth,andoneofthosewhiteflabbyfacesthatlookedexactlyasthoughithadbeenboiled.Shewaslikeagreatwhitesoggyoverboiledcabbage.AuntSpiker,ontheotherhand,wasleanandtallandbony,andsheworesteel-rimmedspectaclesthatfixedontotheendofhernosewithaclip.Shehadascreechingvoiceandlongwetnarrowlips,andwhenevershegotangryorexcited,littleflecksofspitwouldcomeshootingoutofhermouthasshetalked.Andtheretheysat,thesetwoghastlyhags,sippingtheirdrinks,andeverynowandagainscreamingatJamestochopfasterandfaster.Theyalsotalkedaboutthemselves,eachonesayinghowbeautifulshethoughtshewas.Aunt
Spongehadalong-handledmirroronherlap,andshekeptpickingitupandgazingatherownhideousface.
‘Ilookandsmell,’AuntSpongedeclared,‘aslovelyasarose!
Justfeastyoureyesuponmyface,observemyshapelynose!
Beholdmyheavenlysilkylocks!
AndifItakeoffbothmysocks
You’llseemydaintytoes.’
‘Butdon’tforget,’AuntSpikercried,‘howmuchyourtummyshows!’
AuntSpongewentred.AuntSpikersaid,‘Mysweet,youcannotwin,
BeholdMYgorgeouscurvyshape,myteeth,mycharminggrin!
Oh,beauteousme!HowIadore
Myradiantlooks!Andpleaseignore
Thepimpleonmychin.’
‘Mydearoldtrout!’AuntSpongecriedout,‘You’reonlybonesandskin!’
‘SuchlovelinessasIpossesscanonlytrulyshine
InHollywood!’AuntSpongedeclared:‘Oh,wouldn’tthatbefine!
I’dcaptureallthenations’hearts!
They’dgivemealltheleadingparts!
Thestarswouldallresign!’
‘Ithinkyou’dmake,’AuntSpikersaid,‘alovelyFrankenstein.’
PoorJameswasstillslavingawayatthechopping-block.Theheatwasterrible.Hewassweatingallover.Hisarmwasaching.Thechopperwasalargebluntthingfartooheavyforasmallboytouse.Andasheworked,Jamesbeganthinkingaboutalltheotherchildrenintheworldandwhattheymightbedoingatthismoment.Somewouldberidingtricyclesintheirgardens.Somewouldbewalkingincoolwoodsandpickingbunchesofwildflowers.Andallthelittlefriendswhomheusedtoknowwouldbedownbytheseaside,playinginthewetsandandsplashingaroundinthewater…
GreattearsbeganoozingoutofJames’seyesandrollingdownhischeeks.Hestoppedworkingandleanedagainstthechopping-block,overwhelmedbyhisownunhappiness.
‘What’sthematterwithyou?’AuntSpikerscreeched,glaringathimoverthetopofhersteelspectacles.
Jamesbegantocry.
‘Stopthatimmediatelyandgetonwithyourwork,younastylittlebeast!’AuntSpongeordered.
‘Oh,AuntieSponge!’Jamescriedout.‘AndAuntieSpiker!Couldn’tweall–please–justforonce–godowntotheseasideonthebus?Itisn’tveryfar–andIfeelsohotandawfulandlonely…’
‘Why,youlazygood-for-nothingbrute!’AuntSpikershouted.
‘Beathim!’criedAuntSponge.
‘Icertainlywill!’AuntSpikersnapped.SheglaredatJames,andJameslookedbackatherwithlargefrightenedeyes.‘IshallbeatyoulateroninthedaywhenIdon’tfeelsohot,’shesaid.‘Andnowgetoutofmysight,youdisgustinglittleworm,andgivemesomepeace!’
Jamesturnedandran.Heranoffasfastashecouldtothefarend
ofthegardenandhidhimselfbehindthatclumpofdirtyoldlaurelbushesthatwementionedearlieron.Thenhecoveredhisfacewithhishandsandbegantocryandcry.
Three
Itwasatthispointthatthefirstthingofall,theratherpeculiarthingthatledtosomanyothermuchmorepeculiarthings,happenedtohim.
Forsuddenly,justbehindhim,Jamesheardarustlingofleaves,andheturnedroundandsawanoldmaninafunnydark-greensuitemergingfromthebushes.Hewasaverysmalloldman,buthehadahugebaldheadandafacethatwascoveredalloverwithbristlyblackwhiskers.Hestoppedwhenhewasaboutthreeyardsaway,andhestoodthereleaningonhisstickandstaringhardatJames.
Whenhespoke,hisvoicewasveryslowandcreaky.‘Comeclosertome,littleboy,’hesaid,beckoningtoJameswithafinger.‘ComerightupclosetomeandIwillshowyousomethingwonderful.’
Jameswastoofrightenedtomove.
Theoldmanhobbledasteportwonearer,andthenheputahandintothepocketofhisjacketandtookoutasmallwhitepaperbag.
‘Youseethis?’hewhispered,wavingthebaggentlytoandfroinfrontofJames’sface.‘Youknowwhatthisis,mydear?Youknowwhat’sinsidethislittlebag?’
Thenhecamenearerstill,leaningforwardandpushinghisfacesoclosetoJamesthatJamescouldfeelbreathblowingonhischeeks.Thebreathsmelledmustyandstaleandslightlymildewed,likeairinanoldcellar.
‘Takealook,mydear,’hesaid,openingthebagandtiltingittowardsJames.Insideit,Jamescouldseeamassoftinygreenthingsthatlookedlikelittlestonesorcrystals,eachoneaboutthesizeofagrainofrice.Theywereextraordinarilybeautiful,andtherewasastrangebrightnessaboutthem,asortofluminousqualitythatmadethemglowandsparkleinthemostwonderfulway.
‘Listentothem!’theoldmanwhispered.‘Listentothemmove!’
Jamesstaredintothebag,andsureenoughtherewasafaintrustlingsoundcomingupfrominsideit,andthenhenoticedthatallthethousandsoflittlegreenthingswereslowly,veryveryslowlystirringaboutandmovingovereachotherasthoughtheywerealive.
‘There’smorepowerandmagicinthosethingsintherethaninalltherestoftheworldputtogether,’theoldmansaidsoftly.
‘But–but–whatarethey?’Jamesmurmured,findinghisvoiceatlast.‘Wheredotheycomefrom?’
‘Ah-ha,’theoldmanwhispered.‘You’dneverguessthat!’Hewas
crouchingalittlenowandpushinghisfacestillcloserandclosertoJamesuntilthetipofhislongnosewasactuallytouchingtheskinonJames’sforehead.Thensuddenlyhejumpedbackandbeganwavinghisstickmadlyintheair.‘Crocodiletongues!’hecried.‘Onethousandlongslimycrocodiletonguesboiledupintheskullofadeadwitchfortwentydaysandnightswiththeeyeballsofalizard!Addthefingersofayoungmonkey,thegizzardofapig,thebeakofagreenparrot,thejuiceofaporcupine,andthreespoonfulsofsugar.Stewforanotherweek,andthenletthemoondotherest!’
Allatonce,hepushedthewhitepaperbagintoJames’shands,andsaid,‘Here!Youtakeit!It’syours!’
Four
JamesHenryTrotterstoodthereclutchingthebagandstaringattheoldman.
‘Andnow,’theoldmansaid,‘allyou‘vegottodoisthis.Takealargejugofwater,andpourallthelittlegreenthingsintoit.Then,veryslowly,onebyone,addtenhairsfromyourownhead.Thatsetsthemoff!Itgetsthemgoing!Inacoupleofminutesthewaterwillbegintofrothandbubblefuriously,andassoonasthathappensyoumustquicklydrinkitalldown,thewholejugful,inonegulp.Andthen,mydear,youwillfeelitchurningandboilinginyourstomach,andsteamwillstartcomingoutofyourmouth,andimmediatelyafterthat,marvellousthingswillstarthappeningtoyou,fabulous,unbelievablethings–andyouwillneverbemiserableagaininyourlife.Becauseyouaremiserable,aren’tyou?Youneedn’ttellme!Iknowallaboutit!Now,offyougoanddoexactlyasIsay.Anddon’twhisperawordofthistothosetwohorribleauntsofyours!Notaword!Anddon’tletthosegreenthingsintheregetawayfromyoueither!Becauseiftheydoescape,thentheywillbeworkingtheirmagicuponsomebodyelseinsteadofuponyou!Andthatisn’twhatyouwantatall,isit,mydear?Whoevertheymeetfirst,beitbug,insect,animal,ortree,thatwillbetheonewhogetsthefullpoweroftheirmagic!Soholdthebagtight!Don’ttearthepaper!Offyougo!Hurryup!Don’twait!Now’sthetime!Hurry!’
Withthat,theoldmanturnedawayanddisappearedintothebushes.
Five
Thenextmoment,Jameswasrunningbacktowardsthehouseasfastashecouldgo.Hewoulddoitallinthekitchen,hetoldhimself–ifonlyhecouldgetintherewithoutAuntSpongeandAuntSpikerseeinghim.Hewasterriblyexcited.Heflewthroughthelonggrassandthestinging-nettles,notcaringwhetherhegotstungornotonhisbareknees,andinthedistancehecouldseeAuntSpongeandAuntSpikersittingintheirchairswiththeirbackstowardshim.Heswervedawayfromthemsoastogoroundtheothersideofthehouse,butthensuddenly,justashewaspassingunderneaththeoldpeachtreethatstoodinthemiddleofthegarden,hisfootslippedandhefellflatonhisfaceinthegrass.Thepaperbagburstopenasithitthegroundandthethousandsoftinygreenthingswerescatteredinalldirections.
Jamesimmediatelypickedhimselfupontohishandsandkneesandstartedsearchingaroundforhisprecioustreasures.Butwhatwasthis?Theywereallsinkingintothesoil!Hecouldactuallyseethemwrigglingandtwistingastheyburrowedtheirwaydownwardintothehardearth,andatoncehereachedoutahandtopicksomeofthemupbeforeitwastoolate,buttheydisappearedrightunderhisfingers.Hewentaftersomeothers,andthesamethinghappened!Hebeganscrabblingaroundfranticallyinanefforttocatchholdofthosethatwereleft,buttheyweretooquickforhim.Eachtimethetipsofhisfingerswerejustabouttotouchthem,theyvanishedintotheearth!Andsoon,inthespaceofonlyafewseconds,everysingleoneofthemhadgone!
Jamesfeltlikecrying.Hewouldnevergetthembacknow–they
werelost,lost,lostforever.
Butwherehadtheygoneto?Andwhyintheworldhadtheybeensoeagertopushdownintotheearthlikethat?Whatweretheyafter?Therewasnothingdownthere.Nothingexcepttherootsoftheoldpeachtree…andawholelotofearthwormsandcentipedesandinsectslivinginthesoil.
Butwhatwasitthattheoldmanhadsaid?Whoevertheymeetfirst,beitbug,insect,animal,ortree,thatwillbetheonewhogetsthefullpoweroftheirmagic!
Goodheavens,thoughtJames.Whatisgoingtohappeninthatcaseiftheydomeetanearthworm?Oracentipede?Oraspider?Andwhatiftheydogointotherootsofthepeachtree?
‘Getupatonce,youlazylittlebeast!’avoicewassuddenlyshoutinginJames’sear.JamesglancedupandsawAuntSpikerstandingoverhim,grimandtallandbony,glaringathimthroughhersteel-rimmedspectacles.‘Getbackoverthereimmediatelyandfinishchoppingupthoselogs!’sheordered.
AuntSponge,fatandpulpyasajellyfish,camewaddlingupbehindhersistertoseewhatwasgoingon.‘Whydon’twejustlowertheboydownthewellinabucketandleavehimthereforthenight?’shesuggested.‘Thatoughttoteachhimnottolazearoundlikethisthewholedaylong.’
‘That’saverygoodwheeze,mydearSponge.Butlet’smakehimfinishchoppingupthewoodfirst.Beoffwithyouatonce,youhideousbrat,anddosomework!’
Slowly,sadly,poorJamesgotupoffthegroundandwentbacktothewoodpile.Oh,ifonlyhehadn’tslippedandfallenanddropped
thatpreciousbag.Allhopeofahappierlifehadgonecompletelynow.Todayandtomorrowandthenextdayandalltheotherdaysaswellwouldbenothingbutpunishmentandpain,unhappinessanddespair.
Hepickedupthechopperandwasjustabouttostartchoppingawayagainwhenheheardashoutbehindhimthatmadehimstopandturn.
Six
‘Sponge!Sponge!Comehereatonceandlookatthis!’
‘Atwhat?’
‘It’sapeach!’AuntSpikerwasshouting.
‘Awhat?’
‘Apeach!Rightupthereonthehighestbranch!Can’tyouseeit?’
‘Ithinkyoumustbemistaken,mydearSpiker.Thatmiserabletreeneverhasanypeachesonit.’
‘There’soneonitnow,Sponge!Youlookforyourself!’
‘You’reteasingme,Spiker.You’remakingmymouthwateronpurposewhenthere’snothingtoputintoit.Why,thattree’snever
evenhadablossomonit,letaloneapeach.Rightuponthehighestbranch,yousay?Ican’tseeathing.Veryfunny…Ha,ha…Goodgraciousme!Well,I’llbeblowed!Therereallyisapeachupthere!’
‘Anicebigone,too!’AuntSpikersaid.
‘Abeauty,abeauty!’AuntSpongecriedout.
Atthispoint,Jamesslowlyputdownhischopperandturnedandlookedacrossatthetwowomenwhowerestandingunderneaththepeachtree.
Somethingisabouttohappen,hetoldhimself.Somethingpeculiarisabouttohappenanymoment.Hehadn’tthefaintestideawhatitmightbe,buthecouldfeelitinhisbonesthatsomethingwasgoingtohappensoon.Hecouldfeelitintheairaroundhim…inthesuddenstillnessthathadfallenuponthegarden…
Jamestiptoedalittleclosertothetree.Theauntswerenottalkingnow.Theywerejuststandingthere,staringatthepeach.Therewasnotasoundanywhere,notevenabreathofwind,andoverheadthesunblazeddownuponthemoutofadeepbluesky.
‘Itlooksripetome,’AuntSpikersaid,breakingthesilence.
‘Thenwhydon’tweeatit?’AuntSpongesuggested,lickingherthicklips.‘Wecanhavehalfeach.Hey,you!James!Comeoverhereatonceandclimbthistree!’
Jamescamerunningover.
‘Iwantyoutopickthatpeachupthereonthehighestbranch,’AuntSpongewenton.‘Canyouseeit?’
‘Yes,AuntieSponge,Icanseeit!’
‘Anddon’tyoudareeatanyofityourself.YourAuntSpikerandI
aregoingtohaveitbetweenusrighthereandnow,halfeach.Getonwithyou!Upyougo!’
Jamescrossedovertothetreetrunk.
‘Stop!’AuntSpikersaidquickly.‘Holdeverything!’Shewasstaringupintothebrancheswithhermouthwideopenandhereyesbulgingasthoughshehadseenaghost.‘Look!’shesaid.‘Look,Sponge,look!’
‘What’sthematterwithyou?’AuntSpongedemanded.
‘It’sgrowing!’AuntSpikercried.‘It’sgettingbiggerandbigger!’
‘Whatis?’
‘Thepeach,ofcourse!’
‘You’rejoking!’
‘Well,lookforyourself!’
‘ButmydearSpiker,that’sperfectlyridiculous.That’simpossible.That’s–that’s–that’s–Now,waitjustaminute–No–Nothatcan’tberight–No–Yes–GreatScott!Thethingreallyisgrowing!’
‘It’snearlytwiceasbigalready!’AuntSpikershouted.
‘Itcan’tbetrue!’
‘Itistrue!’
‘Itmustbeamiracle!’
‘Watchit!Watchit!’
‘Iamwatchingit!’
‘Greatheavensalive!’AuntSpikeryelled.‘Icanactuallyseethethingbulgingandswellingbeforemyveryeyes!’
Seven
Thetwowomenandthesmallboystoodabsolutelystillonthegrassunderneaththetree,gazingupatthisextraordinaryfruit.James’slittlefacewasglowingwithexcitement,hiseyeswereasbigandbrightastwostars.Hecouldseethepeachswellinglargerandlargerasclearlyasifitwereaballoonbeingblownup.
Inhalfaminute,itwasthesizeofamelon!
Inanotherhalf-minute,itwastwiceasbigagain!
‘Justlookatitgrowing!’AuntSpikercried.
‘Williteverstop!’AuntSpongeshouted,wavingherfatarmsandstartingtodancearoundincircles.
Andnowitwassobigitlookedlikeanenormousbutter-colouredpumpkindanglingfromthetopofthetree.
‘Getawayfromthattreetrunk,youstupidboy!’AuntSpikeryelled.‘TheslightestshakeandI‘msureit’llfalloff!Itmustweightwentyorthirtypoundsatleast!’
Thebranchthatthepeachwasgrowinguponwasbeginningtobendoverfurtherandfurtherbecauseoftheweight.
‘Standback!’AuntSpongeshouted.‘It’scomingdown!Thebranchisgoingtobreak!’
Butthebranchdidn’tbreak.Itsimplybentovermoreandmoreasthepeachgotheavierandheavier.
Andstillitwentongrowing.
Inanotherminute,thismammothfruitwasaslargeandroundandfatasAuntSpongeherself,andprobablyjustasheavy.
‘Ithastostopnow!’AuntSpikeryelled.‘Itcan’tgoonforever!’
Butitdidn’tstop.
Soonitwasthesizeofasmallcar,andreachedhalfwaytotheground.
Bothauntswerenowhoppingroundandroundthetree,clappingtheirhandsandshoutingallsortsofsillythingsintheirexcitement.
‘Hallelujah!’AuntSpikershouted.‘Whatapeach!Whatapeach!’
‘Terrifico!’AuntSpongecriedout,‘Magnifico!Splendifico!Andwhatameal!’
‘It’sstillgrowing.’
‘Iknow!Iknow!’
AsforJames,hewassospellboundbythewholethingthathecouldonlystandandstareandmurmurquietlytohimself,‘Oh,isn’titbeautiful.It’sthemostbeautifulthingI‘veeverseen.’
‘Shutup,youlittletwerp!’AuntSpikersnapped,happeningtooverhearhim.‘It’snoneofyourbusiness!’
‘That’sright,’AuntSpongedeclared.‘It’sgotnothingtodowithyouwhatsoever!Keepoutofit.’
‘Look!’AuntSpikershouted.‘It’sgrowingfasterthanevernow!It’sspeedingup!’
‘Iseeit,Spiker!Ido!Ido!’
Biggerandbiggergrewthepeach,biggerandbiggerandbigger.
Thenatlast,whenithadbecomenearlyastallasthetreethatitwasgrowingon,astallandwide,infact,asasmallhouse,thebottompartofitgentlytouchedtheground–andthereitrested.
‘Itcan’tfalloffnow!’AuntSpongeshouted.
‘It’sstoppedgrowing!’AuntSpikercried.
‘No,ithasn‘t!’
‘Yes,ithas!’
‘It’sslowingdown,Spiker,it’sslowingdown!Butithasn’tstoppedyet!Youwatchit!’
Therewasapause.
‘Ithasnow!’
‘Ibelieveyou’reright.’
‘Doyouthinkit’ssafetotouchit?’
‘Idon’tknow.We’dbetterbecareful.’
AuntSpongeandAuntSpikerbeganwalkingslowlyroundthepeach,inspectingitverycautiouslyfromallsides.Theywerelikeacoupleofhunterswhohadjustshotanelephantandwerenotquitesurewhetheritwasdeadoralive.Andthemassiveroundfruittoweredoverthemsohighthattheylookedlikemidgetsfromanotherworldbesideit.
Theskinofthepeachwasverybeautiful–arichbutteryyellowwithpatchesofbrilliantpinkandred.AuntSpongeadvancedcautiouslyandtoucheditwiththetipofonefinger.‘It’sripe!’shecried.‘It’sjustperfect!Now,lookhere,Spiker.Whydon’twegoandgetashovelrightawayanddigoutagreatbigchunkofitforyouand
metoeat?’
‘No,’AuntSpikersaid.‘Notyet.’
‘Whyevernot?’
‘BecauseIsayso.’
‘ButIcan’twaittoeatsome!’AuntSpongecriedout.Shewaswateringatthemouthnowandathintrickleofspitwasrunningdownonesideofherchin.
‘MydearSponge,’AuntSpikersaidslowly,winkingathersisterandsmilingasly,thin-lippedsmile.‘There’sapileofmoneytobemadeoutofthisifonlywecanhandleitright.Youwaitandsee.’
Eight
Thenewsthatapeachalmostasbigasahousehadsuddenlyappearedinsomeone’sgardenspreadlikewildfireacrossthecountryside,andthenextdayastreamofpeoplecamescramblingupthesteephilltogazeuponthismarvel.
Quickly,AuntSpongeandAuntSpikercalledincarpentersandhadthembuildastrongfenceroundthepeachtosaveitfromthecrowd;andatthesametime,thesetwocraftywomenstationedthemselvesatthefrontgatewithalargebunchofticketsandstartedchargingeveryoneforcomingin.
‘Rollup!Rollup!’AuntSpikeryelled.‘Onlyoneshillingtoseethegiantpeach!’
‘Halfpriceforchildrenundersixweeksold!’AuntSpongeshouted.
‘Oneatatime,please!Don’tpush!Don’tpush!You’reallgoingtogetin!’
‘Hey,you!Comeback,there!Youhaven’tpaid!’
Bylunchtime,thewholeplacewasaseethingmassofmen,women,andchildrenallpushingandshovingtogetaglimpseofthismiraculousfruit.Helicopterswerelandinglikewaspsalloverthehill,andoutofthempouredswarmsofnewspaperreporters,cameramen,andmenfromthetelevisioncompanies.
‘It’llcostyoudoubletobringinacamera!’AuntSpikershouted.
‘Allright!Allright!’theyanswered.‘Wedon’tcare!’Andthemoneycamerollingintothepocketsofthetwogreedyaunts.
Butwhileallthisexcitementwasgoingonoutside,poorJameswasforcedtostaylockedinhisbedroom,peepingthroughthebarsofhiswindowatthecrowdsbelow.
‘Thedisgustinglittlebrutewillonlygetineveryone’swayifwelethimwanderabout,’AuntSpikerhadsaidearlythatmorning.
‘Oh,please!’hehadbegged.‘Ihaven’tmetanyotherchildrenforyearsandyearsandtherearegoingtobelotsofthemdownthereformetoplaywith.AndperhapsIcouldhelpyouwiththetickets.’
‘Shutup!’AuntSpongehadsnapped.‘YourAuntSpikerandIareabouttobecomemillionaires,andthelastthingwewantisthelikesofyoumessingthingsupandgettingintheway.’
Later,whentheeveningofthefirstdaycameandthepeoplehadallgonehome,theauntsunlockedJames’sdoorandorderedhimtogooutsideandpickupallthebananaskinsandorangepeelandbitsofpaperthatthecrowdhadleftbehind.
‘CouldIpleasehavesomethingtoeatfirst?’heasked.‘Ihaven’thadathingallday.’
‘No!’theyshouted,kickinghimoutofthedoor.‘We’retoobusytomakefood!Wearecountingourmoney!’
‘Butit’sdark!’criedJames.
‘Getout!’theyyelled.‘Andstayoutuntilyou‘vecleanedupallthemess!’Thedoorslammed.Thekeyturnedinthelock.
Nine
Hungryandtrembling,Jamesstoodaloneoutintheopen,wonderingwhattodo.Thenightwasallaroundhimnow,andhighoverheadawildwhitemoonwasridinginthesky.Therewasnotasound,notamovementanywhere.
Mostpeople–andespeciallysmallchildren–areoftenquitescaredofbeingoutofdoorsaloneinthemoonlight.Everythingissodeadlyquiet,andtheshadowsaresolongandblack,andtheykeepturningintostrangeshapesthatseemtomoveasyoulookatthem,andtheslightestlittlesnapofatwigmakesyoujump.
Jamesfeltexactlylikethatnow.Hestaredstraightaheadwithlargefrightenedeyes,hardlydaringtobreathe.Notfaraway,inthemiddleofthegarden,hecouldseethegiantpeachtoweringovereverythingelse.Surelyitwasevenbiggertonightthaneverbefore?Andwhatadazzlingsightitwas!Themoonlightwasshiningandglintingonitsgreatcurvingsides,turningthemtocrystalandsilver.Itlookedlikeatremendoussilverballlyingthereinthegrass,silent,mysterious,andwonderful.
Andthenallatonce,littleshiversofexcitementstartedrunningovertheskinonJames’sback.
Somethingelse,hetoldhimself,somethingstrangerthaneverthistime,isabouttohappentomeagainsoon.Hewassureofit.Hecouldfeelitcoming.
Helookedaroundhim,wonderingwhatonearthitwasgoingtobe.Thegardenlaysoftandsilverinthemoonlight.Thegrasswaswet
withdewandamilliondewdropsweresparklingandtwinklinglikediamondsaroundhisfeet.Andnowsuddenly,thewholeplace,thewholegardenseemedtobealivewithmagic.
Almostwithoutknowingwhathewasdoing,asthoughdrawnbysomepowerfulmagnet,JamesHenryTrotterstartedwalkingslowlytowardsthegiantpeach.Heclimbedoverthefencethatsurroundedit,andstooddirectlybeneathit,staringupatitsgreatbulgingsides.Heputoutahandandtoucheditgentlywiththetipofonefinger.Itfeltsoftandwarmandslightlyfurry,liketheskinofababymouse.Hemovedastepcloserandrubbedhischeeklightlyagainstthesoftskin.Andthensuddenly,whilehewasdoingthis,hehappenedtonoticethatrightbesidehimandbelowhim,closetotheground,therewasaholeinthesideofthepeach.
Ten
Itwasquitealargehole,thesortofthingananimalaboutthesizeofafoxmighthavemade.
Jameskneltdowninfrontofit,andpokedhisheadandshouldersinside.
Hecrawledin.
Hekeptoncrawling.
Thisisn’tahole,hethoughtexcitedly.It’satunnel!
Thetunnelwasdampandmurky,andallaroundhimtherewasthecuriousbittersweetsmelloffreshpeach.Thefloorwassoggyunderhisknees,thewallswerewetandsticky,andpeachjuicewasdrippingfromtheceiling.Jamesopenedhismouthandcaughtsomeofitonhistongue.Ittasteddelicious.
Hewascrawlinguphillnow,asthoughthetunnelwereleadingstraighttowardstheverycentreofthegiganticfruit.Everyfewsecondshepausedandtookabiteoutofthewall.Thepeachfleshwassweetandjuicy,andmarvellouslyrefreshing.
Hecrawledonforseveralmoreyards,andthensuddenly–bang–thetopofhisheadbumpedintosomethingextremelyhardblockinghisway.Heglancedup.Infrontofhimtherewasasolidwallthatseemedatfirstasthoughitweremadeofwood.Hetoucheditwithhisfingers.Itcertainlyfeltlikewood,exceptthatitwasveryjaggedandfullofdeepgrooves.
‘Goodheavens!’hesaid.‘Iknowwhatthisis!I‘vecometothestone
inthemiddleofthepeach!’
Thenhenoticedthattherewasasmalldoorcutintothefaceofthepeachstone.Hegaveapush.Itswungopen.Hecrawledthroughit,andbeforehehadtimetoglanceupandseewherehewas,heheardavoicesaying,‘Lookwho’shere!’Andanotheronesaid,‘We‘vebeenwaitingforyou!’
Jamesstoppedandstaredatthespeakers,hisfacewhitewithhorror.
Hestartedtostandup,buthiskneeswereshakingsomuchhehadtositdownagainonthefloor.Heglancedbehindhim,thinkinghecouldboltbackintothetunnelthewayhehadcome,butthedoorwayhaddisappeared.Therewasnowonlyasolidbrownwallbehindhim.
Eleven
James’slargefrightenedeyestravelledslowlyroundtheroom.
Thecreatures,somesittingonchairs,othersrecliningonasofa,wereallwatchinghimintently.
Creatures?
Orweretheyinsects?
Aninsectisusuallysomethingrathersmall,isitnot?Agrasshopper,forexample,isaninsect.
Sowhatwouldyoucallitifyousawagrasshopperaslargeasadog?Aslargeasalargedog.Youcouldhardlycallthataninsect,couldyou?
TherewasanOld-Green-GrasshopperaslargeasalargedogsittingdirectlyacrosstheroomfromJamesnow.
AndnexttotheOld-Green-Grasshopper,therewasanenormousSpider.
AndnexttotheSpider,therewasagiantLadybirdwithnineblackspotsonherscarletshell.
Eachofthesethreewassquattinguponamagnificentchair.
Onasofanearby,recliningcomfortablyincurled-uppositions,therewereaCentipedeandanEarthworm.
Ontheflooroverinthefarcorner,therewassomethingthickandwhitethatlookedasthoughitmightbeaSilkworm.Butitwassleepingsoundlyandnobodywaspayinganyattentiontoit.
Everyoneofthese‘creatures’wasatleastasbigasJameshimself,andinthestrangegreenishlightthatshonedownfromsomewhereintheceiling,theywereabsolutelyterrifyingtobehold.
‘I‘mhungry!’theSpiderannouncedsuddenly,staringhardatJames.
‘I‘mfamished!’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.
‘SoamI!’theLadybirdcried.
TheCentipedesatupalittlestraighteronthesofa.‘Everyone’sfamished!’hesaid.‘Weneedfood!’
FourpairsofroundblackglassyeyeswereallfixeduponJames.
TheCentipedemadeawrigglingmovementwithhisbodyasthoughhewereabouttoglideoffthesofa–buthedidn‘t.
Therewasalongpause–andalongsilence.
TheSpider(whohappenedtobeafemalespider)openedhermouthandranalongblacktonguedelicatelyoverherlips.‘Aren’tyouhungry?’sheaskedsuddenly,leaningforwardandaddressingherselftoJames.
PoorJameswasbackedupagainstthefarwall,shiveringwithfrightandmuchtooterrifiedtoanswer.
‘What’sthematterwithyou?’theOld-Green-Grasshopperasked.‘Youlookpositivelyill!’
‘Helooksasthoughhe’sgoingtofaintanysecond,’theCentipedesaid.
‘Oh,mygoodness,thepoorthing!’theLadybirdcried.‘Idobelievehethinksit’shimthatwearewantingtoeat!’
Therewasaroaroflaughterfromallsides.
‘Ohdear,ohdear!’theysaid.‘Whatanawfulthought!’
‘Youmustn’tbefrightened,’theLadybirdsaidkindly.‘Wewouldn’tdreamofhurtingyou.Youareoneofusnow,didn’tyouknowthat?Youareoneofthecrew.We’reallinthesameboat.’
‘We‘vebeenwaitingforyoualldaylong,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.‘Wethoughtyouwerenevergoingtoturnup.I‘mgladyoumadeit.’
‘Socheerup,myboy,cheerup!’theCentipedesaid.‘AndmeanwhileIwishyou’dcomeoverhereandgivemeahandwiththeseboots.Ittakesmehourstogetthemalloffbymyself.’
Twelve
Jamesdecidedthatthiswasmostcertainlynotatimetobedisagreeable,sohecrossedtheroomtowheretheCentipedewassittingandkneltdownbesidehim.
‘Thankyousomuch,’theCentipedesaid.‘Youareverykind.’
‘Youhavealotofboots,’Jamesmurmured.
‘Ihavealotoflegs,’theCentipedeansweredproudly.‘Andalotoffeet.Onehundred,tobeexact.’
‘Therehegoesagain!’theEarthwormcried,speakingforthefirsttime.‘Hesimplycannotstoptellingliesabouthislegs!Hedoesn’thaveanythinglikeahundredofthem!He’sonlygotforty-two!Thetroubleisthatmostpeopledon’tbothertocountthem.Theyjusttakehisword.Andanyway,thereisnothingmarvellous,youknow,Centipede,abouthavingalotoflegs.’
‘Poorfellow,’theCentipedesaid,whisperinginJames’sear.‘He’sblind.Hecan’tseehowsplendidIlook.’
‘Inmyopinion,’theEarthwormsaid,‘thereallymarvellousthingistohavenolegsatallandtobeabletowalkjustthesame.’
‘Youcallthatwalking!’criedtheCentipede.‘You’reaslitherer,that’sallyouare!Youjustslitheralong!’
‘Iglide,’saidtheEarthwormprimly.
‘Youareaslimybeast,’answeredtheCentipede.
‘Iamnotaslimybeast,’theEarthwormsaid.‘Iamausefulandmuchlovedcreature.Askanygardeneryoulike.Andasforyou…’
‘Iamapest!’theCentipedeannounced,grinningbroadlyandlookingroundtheroomforapproval.
‘Heissoproudofthat,’theLadybirdsaid,smilingatJames.‘ThoughforthelifeofmeIcannotunderstandwhy.’
‘Iamtheonlypestinthisroom!’criedtheCentipede,stillgrinningaway.‘UnlessyoucountOld-Green-Grasshopperoverthere.Butheislongpastitnow.Heistoooldtobeapestanymore.’
TheOld-Green-Grasshopperturnedhishugeblackeyesuponthe
Centipedeandgavehimawitheringlook.‘Youngfellow,’hesaid,speakinginadeep,slow,scornfulvoice,‘Ihaveneverbeenapestinmylife.Iamamusician.’
‘Hear,hear!’saidtheLadybird.
‘James,’theCentipedesaid.‘YournameisJames,isn’tit?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well,James,haveyoueverinyourlifeseensuchamarvellouscolossalCentipedeasme?’
‘Icertainlyhaven‘t,’Jamesanswered.‘Howonearthdidyougettobelikethat?’
‘Verypeculiar,’theCentipedesaid.‘Very,verypeculiarindeed.Letmetellyouwhathappened.Iwasmessingaboutinthegardenundertheoldpeachtreeandsuddenlyafunnylittlegreenthingcamewrigglingpastmynose.Brightgreenitwas,andextraordinarilybeautiful,anditlookedlikesomekindofatinystoneorcrystal…’
‘Oh,butIknowwhatthatwas!’criedJames.
‘Ithappenedtome,too!’saidtheLadybird.
‘Andme!’MissSpidersaid.‘Suddenlytherewerelittlegreenthingseverywhere!Thesoilwasfullofthem!’
‘Iactuallyswallowedone!’theEarthwormdeclaredproudly.
‘SodidI!’theLadybirdsaid.
‘Iswallowedthree!’theCentipedecried.‘Butwho’stellingthisstoryanyway?Don’tinterrupt!’
‘It’stoolatetotellstoriesnow,’theOld-Green-Grasshopperannounced.‘It’stimetogotosleep.’
‘Irefusetosleepinmyboots!’theCentipedecried.‘Howmanymorearetheretocomeoff,James?’
‘IthinkI‘vedoneabouttwentysofar,’Jamestoldhim.
‘Thenthatleaveseightytogo,’theCentipedesaid.
‘Twenty-two,noteighty!’shriekedtheEarthworm.‘He’slyingagain.’
TheCentipederoaredwithlaughter.
‘StoppullingtheEarthworm’sleg,’theLadybirdsaid.
ThissenttheCentipedeintohysterics.‘Pullinghisleg!’hecried,wrigglingwithgleeandpointingattheEarthworm.‘WhichlegamIpulling?Youtellmethat!’
JamesdecidedthatheratherlikedtheCentipede.Hewasobviouslyarascal,butwhatachangeitwastohearsomebodylaughingonceinawhile.HehadneverheardAuntSpongeorAuntSpikerlaughingaloudinallthetimehehadbeenwiththem.
‘Wereallymustgetsomesleep,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.‘We‘vegotatoughdayaheadofustomorrow.Sowouldyoubekindenough,MissSpider,tomakethebeds?’
Thirteen
Afew-minuteslater,MissSpiderhadmadethefirstbed.Itwashangingfromtheceiling,suspendedbyaropeofthreadsateitherendsothatactuallyitlookedmorelikeahammockthanabed.Butitwasamagnificentaffair,andthestuffthatitwasmadeofshimmeredlikesilkinthepalelight.
‘Idohopeyou’llfinditcomfortable,’MissSpidersaidtotheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘ImadeitassoftandsilkyasIpossiblycould.Ispunitwithgossamer.That’samuchbetterqualitythreadthantheoneIuseformyownweb.’
‘Thankyousomuch,mydearlady,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid,climbingintothehammock.‘Ah,thisisjustwhatIneeded.Goodnight,everybody.Goodnight.’
ThenMissSpiderspunthenexthammock,andtheLadybirdgotin.
Afterthat,shespunalongonefortheCentipede,andanevenlongeronefortheEarthworm.
‘Andhowdoyoulikeyourbed?’shesaidtoJameswhenitcametohisturn.‘Hardorsoft?’
‘Ilikeitsoft,thankyouverymuch,’Jamesanswered.
‘Forgoodness’sakestopstaringroundtheroomandgetonwithmyboots!’theCentipedesaid.‘YouandIarenevergoingtogetanysleepatthisrate!Andkindlylinethemupneatlyinpairsasyoutakethemoff.Don’tjustthrowthemoveryourshoulder.’
JamesworkedawayfranticallyontheCentipede’sboots.Eachone
hadlacesthathadtobeuntiedandloosenedbeforeitcouldbepulledoff,andtomakemattersworse,allthelacesweretiedupinthemostterriblecomplicatedknotsthathadtobeunpickedwithfingernails.Itwasjustawful.Ittookabouttwohours.AndbythetimeJameshadpulledoffthelastbootofallandhadlinedthemupinarowonthefloor–twenty-onepairsaltogether–theCentipedewasfastasleep.
‘Wakeup,Centipede,’whisperedJames,givinghimagentlediginthestomach.‘It’stimeforbed.’
‘Thankyou,mydearchild,’theCentipedesaid,openinghiseyes.Thenhegotdownoffthesofaandambledacrosstheroomandcrawledintohishammock.Jamesgotintohisownhammock–andoh,howsoftandcomfortableitwascomparedwiththehardbareboardsthathisauntshadalwaysmadehimsleepuponathome.
‘Lightsout,’saidtheCentipededrowsily.
Nothinghappened.
‘Turnoutthelight!’hecalled,raisinghisvoice.
Jamesglancedroundtheroom,wonderingwhichoftheothershemightbetalkingto,buttheywereallasleep.TheOld-Green-Grasshopperwassnoringloudlythroughhisnose.TheLadybirdwasmakingwhistlingnoisesasshebreathed,andtheEarthwormwascoileduplikeaspringatoneendofhishammock,wheezingandblowingthroughhisopenmouth.AsforMissSpider,shehadmadealovelywebforherselfacrossonecorneroftheroom,andJamescouldseehercrouchingrightintheverycentreofit,mumblingsoftlyinherdreams.
‘Isaidturnoutthelight!’shoutedtheCentipedeangrily.
‘Areyoutalkingtome?’Jamesaskedhim.
‘OfcourseI‘mnottalkingtoyou,youass!’theCentipedeanswered.‘ThatcrazyGlow-wormhasgonetosleepwithherlighton!’
Forthefirsttimesinceenteringtheroom,Jamesglancedupattheceiling–andtherehesawamostextraordinarysight.Somethingthatlookedlikeagiganticflywithoutwings(itwasatleastthreefeetlong)wasstandingupsidedownuponitssixlegsinthemiddleoftheceiling,andthetailendofthiscreatureseemedtobeliterallyonfire.Abrilliantgreenishlightasbrightasthebrightestelectricbulbwasshiningoutofitstailandlightingupthewholeroom.
‘IsthataGlow-worm?’askedJames,staringatthelight.‘Itdoesn’tlooklikeawormofanysorttome.’
‘Ofcourseit’saGlow-worm,’theCentipedeanswered.‘Atleastthat’swhatshecallsherself.Althoughactuallyyouarequiteright.Sheisn’treallyawormatall.Glow-wormsareneverworms.Theyaresimplyladyfireflieswithoutwings.Wakeup,youlazybeast!’
ButtheGlow-wormdidn’tstir,sotheCentipedereachedoutofhishammockandpickeduponeofhisbootsfromthefloor.‘Putoutthatwretchedlight!’heshouted,hurlingthebootupattheceiling.
TheGlow-wormslowlyopenedoneeyeandstaredattheCentipede.‘Thereisnoneedtoberude,’shesaidcoldly.‘Allingoodtime.’
‘Comeon,comeon,comeon!’shoutedtheCentipede.‘OrI’llputitoutforyou!’
‘Oh,hello,James!’theGlow-wormsaid,lookingdownandgivingJamesalittlewaveandasmile.‘Ididn’tseeyoucomein.Welcome,mydearboy,welcome–andgoodnight!’
Thenclick–andoutwentthelight.
JamesHenryTrotterlaythereinthedarknesswithhiseyeswideopen,listeningtothestrangesleepingnoisesthatthe‘creatures’weremakingallaroundhim,andwonderingwhatonearthwasgoingtohappentohiminthemorning.Already,hewasbeginningtolikehisnewfriendsverymuch.Theywerenotnearlyasterribleastheylooked.Infacttheyweren’treallyterribleatall.Theyseemedextremelykindandhelpfulinspiteofalltheshoutingandarguingthatwentonbetweenthem.
‘Goodnight,Old-Green-Grasshopper,’hewhispered.‘Goodnight,Ladybird–Goodnight,MissSpider–’Butbeforehecouldgothroughthemall,hehadfallenfastasleep.
Fourteen
‘We’reoff!’someonewasshouting.‘We’reoffatlast!’
Jameswokeupwithajumpandlookedabouthim.Thecreatureswerealloutoftheirhammocksandmovingexcitedlyaroundtheroom.Suddenly,thefloorgaveagreatheave,asthoughanearthquakeweretakingplace.
‘Herewego!’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,hoppingupanddownwithexcitement.‘Holdontight!’
‘What’shappening?’criedJames,leapingoutofhishammock.‘What’sgoingon?’
TheLadybird,whowasobviouslyakindandgentlecreature,cameoverandstoodbesidehim.‘Incaseyoudon’tknowit,’shesaid,‘weareabouttodepartforeverfromthetopofthisghastlyhillthatwe‘veallbeenlivingonforsolong.Weareabouttorollawayinsidethisgreatbigbeautifulpeachtoalandof…of…of…toalandof–’
‘Ofwhat?’askedJames.
‘Neveryoumind,’saidtheLadybird.‘Butnothingcouldbeworsethanthisdesolatehilltopandthosetworepulsiveauntsofyours–’
‘Hear,hear!’theyallshouted.‘Hear,hear!’
‘Youmaynothavenoticedit,’theLadybirdwenton,‘butthewholegarden,evenbeforeitreachesthesteepedgeofthehill,happenstobeonasteepslope.Andthereforetheonlythingthathasbeenstoppingthispeachfromrollingawayrightfromthebeginningisthethickstemattachingittothetree.Breakthestem,andoffwego.’
‘Watchit!’criedMissSpider,astheroomgaveanotherviolentlurch.‘Herewego!’
‘Notquite!Notquite!’
‘Atthismoment,’continuedtheLadybird,‘ourCentipede,whohasapairofjawsassharpasrazors,isupthereontopofthepeachnibblingawayatthatstem.Infact,hemustbenearlythroughit,asyoucantellfromthewaywe’relurchingabout.Wouldyoulikemetotakeyouundermywingsothatyouwon’tfalloverwhenwestartrolling?’
‘That’sverykindofyou,’saidJames,‘butIthinkI’llbeallright.’
Justthen,theCentipedestuckhisgrinningfacethroughaholeintheceilingandshouted,‘I‘vedoneit!We’reoff!’
‘We’reoff!’theotherscried.‘We’reoff!’
‘Thejourneybegins!’shoutedtheCentipede.
‘Andwhoknowswhereitwillend,’mutteredtheEarthworm,‘ifyouhaveanythingtodowithit.Itcanonlymeantrouble.’
‘Nonsense,’saidtheLadybird.‘Wearenowabouttovisitthemostmarvellousplacesandseethemostwonderfulthings!Isn’tthatso,Centipede?’
‘Thereisnoknowingwhatweshallsee!’criedtheCentipede.
‘WemayseeaCreaturewithforty-nineheads
Wholivesinthedesolatesnow,
Andwheneverhecatchesacold(whichhedreads)
Hehasforty-ninenosestoblow.
‘WemayseethevenomousPink-SpottedScrunch
Whocanchewupamanwithonebite.
Itlikestoeatfiveofthemroastedforlunch
Andeighteenforitssupperatnight.
‘WemayseeaDragon,andnobodyknows
Thatwewon’tseeaUnicornthere.
WemayseeaterribleMonsterwithtoes
Growingoutofthetuftsofhishair.
‘WemayseethesweetlittleBiddy-BrightHen
Soplayful,sokindandwell-bred;
Andsuchbeautifuleggs!Youjustboilthemandthen
Theyexplodeandtheyblowoffyourhead.
‘AGnuandaGnoceroussurelyyou’llsee
AndthatgnormousandgnorribleGnat
Whosestingwhenitstingsyougoesinattheknee
Andcomesoutthroughthetopofyourhat.
‘Wemayevengetlostandbefrozenbyfrost.
Wemaydieinanearthquakeortremor.
Ornastierstill,wemayevenbetossed
OnthehornsofafuriousDilemma.
‘Butwhocares!Letusgofromthishorriblehill!
Letusroll!Letusbowl!Letusplunge!
Let’sgorollingandbowlingandspinninguntil
We’reawayfromoldSpikerandSponge!’
Onesecondlater…slowly,insidiously,ohmostgently,thegreatpeachstartedtoleanforwardandstealintomotion.Thewholeroombegantotiltoverandallthefurniturewentslidingacrossthefloor,andcrashedagainstthefarwall.SodidJamesandtheLadybirdandtheOld-Green-GrasshopperandMissSpiderandtheEarthworm,andalsotheCentipede,whohadjustcomeslitheringquicklydownthewall.
Fifteen
Outsideinthegarden,atthatverymoment,AuntSpongeandAuntSpikerhadjusttakentheirplacesatthefrontgate,eachwithabunchofticketsinherhand,andthefirststreamofearlymorningsightseerswasvisibleinthedistanceclimbingupthehilltoviewthepeach.
‘Weshallmakeafortunetoday,’AuntSpikerwassaying.‘Justlookatallthosepeople!’
‘Iwonderwhatbecameofthathorridlittleboyofourslastnight,’AuntSpongesaid.‘Heneverdidcomebackin,didhe?’
‘Heprobablyfelldowninthedarkandbrokehisleg,’AuntSpikersaid.
‘Orhisneck,maybe,’AuntSpongesaidhopefully.
‘JustwaittillIgetmyhandsonhim,’AuntSpikersaid,wavinghercane.‘He’llneverwanttostayoutallnightagainbythetimeI‘vefinishedwithhim.Goodgraciousme!What’sthatawfulnoise?’
Bothwomenswungroundtolook.
Thenoise,ofcourse,hadbeencausedbythegiantpeachcrashingthroughthefencethatsurroundedit,andnow,gatheringspeedeverysecond,itcamerollingacrossthegardentowardstheplacewhereAuntSpongeandAuntSpikerwerestanding.
Theygaped.Theyscreamed.Theystartedtorun.Theypanicked.Theybothgotineachother’sway.Theybeganpushingandjostling,andeachoneofthemwasthinkingonlyaboutsavingherself.AuntSponge,thefatone,trippedoveraboxthatshe’dbroughtalongto
keepthemoneyin,andfellflatonherface.AuntSpikerimmediatelytrippedoverAuntSpongeandcamedownontopofher.Theybothlayontheground,fightingandclawingandyellingandstrugglingfranticallytogetupagain,butbeforetheycoulddothis,themightypeachwasuponthem.
Therewasacrunch.
Andthentherewassilence.
Thepeachrolledon.Andbehindit,AuntSpongeandAuntSpikerlayironedoutuponthegrassasflatandthinandlifelessasacoupleofpaperdollscutoutofapicturebook.
Sixteen
Andnowthepeachhadbrokenoutofthegardenandwasovertheedgeofthehill,rollingandbouncingdownthesteepslopeataterrificpace.Fasterandfasterandfasteritwent,andthecrowdsofpeoplewhowereclimbingupthehillsuddenlycaughtsightofthisterriblemonsterplungingdownuponthemandtheyscreamedandscatteredtorightandleftasitwenthurtlingby.
Atthebottomofthehillitchargedacrosstheroad,knockingoveratelegraphpoleandflatteningtwoparkedcarsasitwentby.
Thenitrushedmadlyacrossabouttwentyfields,breakingdownallthefencesandhedgesinitspath.ItwentrightthroughthemiddleofaherdoffineJerseycows,andthenthroughaflockofsheep,andthenthroughapaddockfullofhorses,andthenthroughayardfullofpigs,andsoonthewholecountrysidewasaseethingmassofpanic-strickenanimalsstampedinginalldirections.
Thepeachwasstillgoingatatremendousspeedwithnosignofslowingdown,andaboutamilefartheronitcametoavillage.
Downthemainstreetofthevillageitrolled,withpeopleleapingfranticallyoutofitspathrightandleft,andattheendofthestreetitwentcrashingrightthroughthewallofanenormousbuildingandouttheotherside,leavingtwogapingroundholesinthebrickwork.
Thisbuildinghappenedtobeafamousfactorywheretheymadechocolate,andalmostatonceagreatriverofwarmmeltedchocolatecamepouringoutoftheholesinthefactorywall.Aminutelater,thisbrownstickymesswasflowingthrougheverystreetinthevillage,
oozingunderthedoorsofhousesandintopeople’sshopsandgardens.Childrenwerewadinginituptotheirknees,andsomewereeventryingtoswiminitandallofthemweresuckingitintotheirmouthsingreatgreedygulpsandshriekingwithjoy.
Butthepeachrushedonacrossthecountryside–onandonandon,leavingatrailofdestructioninitswake.Cowsheds,stables,pigsties,barns,bungalows,hayricks,anythingthatgotinitswaywenttopplingoverlikeaninepin.Anoldmansittingquietlybesideastreamhadhisfishingrodwhiskedoutofhishandsasitwentdashingby,andawomancalledDaisyEntwistlewasstandingsoclosetoitasitpassedthatshehadtheskintakenoffthetipofherlongnose.
Woulditeverstop?
Whyshouldit?Aroundobjectwillalwayskeeponrollingaslongasitisonadownhillslope,andinthiscasethelandslopeddownhillallthewayuntilitreachedtheocean–thesameoceanthatJameshadbeggedhisauntstobeallowedtovisitthedaybefore.
Well,perhapshewasgoingtovisititnow.Thepeachwasrushingcloserandclosertoiteverysecond,andcloseralsotothetoweringwhitecliffsthatcamefirst.
ThesecliffsarethemostfamousinthewholeofEngland,andtheyarehundredsoffeethigh.Belowthem,theseaisdeepandcoldandhungry.Manyshipshavebeenswallowedupandlostforeveronthispartofthecoast,andallthemenwhowereinthemaswell.Thepeachwasnowonlyahundredyardsawayfromthecliff–nowfifty–nowtwenty–nowten–nowfive–andwhenitreachedtheedgeofthecliffitseemedtoleapupintotheskyandhangtheresuspendedforafewseconds,stillturningoverandoverintheair.
Thenitbegantofall…
Down…
Down…
Down…
Down…
Down…
SMACK!Ithitthewaterwithacolossalsplashandsanklikeastone.
Butafewsecondslater,upitcameagain,andthistime,upitstayed,floatingserenelyuponthesurfaceofthewater.
Seventeen
Atthismoment,thesceneinsidethepeachitselfwasoneofindescribablechaos.JamesHenryTrotterwaslyingbruisedandbatteredontheflooroftheroomamongstatangledmassofCentipedeandEarthwormandSpiderandLadybirdandGlowwormandOld-Green-Grasshopper.Inthewholehistoryoftheworld,notravellershadeverhadamoreterriblejourneythantheseunfortunatecreatures.Ithadstartedoutwell,withmuchlaughingandshouting,andforthefirstfewseconds,asthepeachhadbeguntorollslowlyforward,nobodyhadmindedbeingtumbledaboutalittlebit.AndwhenitwentBUMP!,andtheCentipedehadshouted,‘ThatwasAuntSponge!’andthenBUMP!again,and‘ThatwasAuntSpiker!’therehadbeenatremendousburstofcheeringallround.
Butassoonasthepeachrolledoutofthegardenandbegantogodownthesteephill,rushingandplungingandboundingmadlydownward,thenthewholethingbecameanightmare.Jamesfoundhimselfbeingflungupagainsttheceiling,thenbackontothefloor,thensidewaysagainstthewall,thenupontotheceilingagain,andupanddownandbackandforthandroundandround,andatthesametimealltheothercreatureswereflyingthroughtheairineverydirection,andsowerethechairsandthesofa,nottomentiontheforty-twobootsbelongingtotheCentipede.Everythingandallofthemwerebeingrattledaroundlikepeasinsideanenormousrattlethatwasbeingrattledbyamadgiantwhorefusedtostop.Tomakeitworse,somethingwentwrongwiththeGlow-worm’slightingsystem,andtheroomwasinpitchydarkness.Therewerescreamsandyells
andcursesandcriesofpain,andeverythingkeptgoingroundandround,andonceJamesmadeafranticgrabatsomethickbarsstickingoutfromthewallonlytofindthattheywereacoupleoftheCentipede’slegs.‘Letgo,youidiot!’shoutedtheCentipede,kickinghimselffree,andJameswaspromptlyflungacrosstheroomintotheOld-Green-Grasshopper’shornylap.TwicehegottangledupinMissSpider’slegs(ahorridbusiness),andtowardstheend,thepoorEarthworm,whowascrackinghimselflikeawhipeverytimeheflewthroughtheairfromonesideoftheroomtotheother,coiledhimselfaroundJames’sbodyinapanicandrefusedtounwind.
Oh,itwasafranticandterribletrip!
Butitwasallovernow,andtheroomwassuddenlyverystillandquiet.Everybodywasbeginningslowlyandpainfullytodisentanglehimselffromeverybodyelse.
‘Let’shavesomelight!’shoutedtheCentipede.
‘Yes!’theycried.‘Light!Giveussomelight!’
‘I‘mtrying,’answeredthepoorGlow-worm.‘I‘mdoingmybest.Pleasebepatient.’
Theyallwaitedinsilence.
ThenafaintgreenishlightbegantoglimmeroutoftheGlow-worm’stail,andthisgraduallybecamestrongerandstrongeruntilitwasanywayenoughtoseeby.
‘Somegreatjourney!’theCentipedesaid,limpingacrosstheroom.
‘Ishallneverbethesameagain,’murmuredtheEarthworm.
‘NorI,’theLadybirdsaid.‘It’stakenyearsoffmylife.’
‘Butmydearfriends!’criedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,tryingtobecheerful.‘Wearethere!’
‘Where?’theyasked.‘Where?Whereisthere?’
‘Idon’tknow,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.‘ButI’llbetit’ssomewheregood.’
‘Weareprobablyatthebottomofacoalmine,’theEarthwormsaidgloomily.‘Wecertainlywentdownanddownanddownverysuddenlyatthelastmoment.Ifeltitinmystomach.Istillfeelit.’
‘Perhapsweareinthemiddleofabeautifulcountryfullofsongsandmusic,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.
‘Orneartheseashore,’saidJameseagerly,‘withlotsofotherchildrendownonthesandformetoplaywith!’
‘Pardonme,’murmuredtheLadybird,turningatriflepale,‘butamIwronginthinkingthatweseemtobebobbingupanddown?’
‘Bobbingupanddown!’theycried.‘Whatonearthdoyoumean?’
‘You’restillgiddyfromthejourney,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppertoldher.‘You’llgetoveritinaminute.Iseverybodyreadytogoupstairsnowandtakealookround?’
‘Yes,yes!’theychorused.‘Comeon!Let’sgo!’
‘Irefusetoshowmyselfoutofdoorsinmybarefeet,’theCentipedesaid.‘Ihavetogetmybootsonagainfirst.’
‘Forheaven’ssake,let’snotgothroughallthatnonsenseagain,’theEarthwormsaid.
‘Let’salllendtheCentipedeahandandgetitoverwith,’theLadybirdsaid.‘Comeon.’
Sotheydid,allexceptMissSpider,whosetaboutweavingalongrope-ladderthatwouldreachfromtheflooruptoaholeintheceiling.TheOld-Green-Grasshopperhadwiselysaidthattheymustnotriskgoingoutofthesideentrancewhentheydidn’tknowwheretheywere,butmustfirstofallgoupontothetopofthepeachandhavealookround.
Sohalfanhourlater,whentherope-ladderhadbeenfinishedandhung,andtheforty-secondboothadbeenlacedneatlyontotheCentipede’sforty-secondfoot,theywereallreadytogoout.Amidstmountingexcitementandshoutsof‘Herewego,boys!ThePromisedLand!Ican’twaittoseeit!’thewholecompanyclimbeduptheladderonebyoneanddisappearedintoadarksoggytunnelintheceilingthatwentsteeply,almostvertically,upward.
Eighteen
Aminutelater,theywereoutintheopen,standingontheverytopofthepeach,nearthestem,blinkingtheireyesinthestrongsunlightandpeeringnervouslyaround.
‘Whathappened?’
‘Wherearewe?’
‘Butthisisimpossible!’
‘Unbelievable!’
‘Terrible!’
‘Itoldyouwewerebobbingupanddown,’theLadybirdsaid.
‘We’reinthemiddleofthesea!’criedJames.
Andindeedtheywere.Astrongcurrentandahighwindhadcarriedthepeachsoquicklyawayfromtheshorethatalreadythelandwasoutofsight.Allaroundthemlaythevastblackocean,deepandhungry.Littlewaveswerebibblingagainstthesidesofthepeach.
‘Buthowdidithappen?’theycried.‘Wherearethefields?Wherearethewoods?WhereisEngland?’Nobody,notevenJames,couldunderstandhowintheworldathinglikethiscouldhavecomeabout.
‘Ladiesandgentlemen,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid,tryingveryhardtokeepthefearanddisappointmentoutofhisvoice,‘Iamafraidthatwefindourselvesinaratherawkwardsituation.’
‘Awkward!’criedtheEarthworm.‘MydearOldGrasshopper,wearefinished!Everyoneofusisabouttoperish!Imaybeblind,youknow,
butthatmuchIcanseequiteclearly.’
‘Offwithmyboots!’shoutedtheCentipede.‘Icannotswimwithmybootson!’
‘Ican’tswimatall!’criedtheLadybird.
‘NorcanI,’wailedtheGlow-worm.
‘NorI!’saidMissSpider.‘Noneofusthreegirlscanswimasinglestroke.’
‘Butyouwon’thavetoswim,’saidJamescalmly.‘Wearefloatingbeautifully.Andsoonerorlaterashipisboundtocomealongandpickusup.’
Theyallstaredathiminamazement.
‘Areyouquitesurethatwearenotsinking?’theLadybirdasked.
‘OfcourseI‘msure,’answeredJames.‘Goandlookforyourselves.’
Theyallranovertothesideofthepeachandpeereddownatthewaterbelow.
‘Theboyisquiteright,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.‘Wearefloatingbeautifully.Nowwemustallsitdownandkeepperfectlycalm.Everythingwillbeallrightintheend.’
‘Whatabsolutenonsense!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Nothingiseverallrightintheend,andwellyouknowit!’
‘PoorEarthworm,’theLadybirdsaid,whisperinginJames’sear.‘Helovestomakeeverythingintoadisaster.Hehatestobehappy.Heisonlyhappywhenheisgloomy.Nowisn’tthatodd?Butthen,IsupposejustbeinganEarthwormisenoughtomakeapersonprettygloomy,don’tyouagree?’
‘Ifthispeachisnotgoingtosink,’theEarthwormwassaying,‘andifwearenotgoingtobedrowned,theneveryoneofusisgoingtostarvetodeathinstead.Doyourealizethatwehaven’thadathingtoeatsinceyesterdaymorning?’
‘Bygolly,he’sright!’criedtheCentipede.‘Foronce,Earthwormisright!’
‘OfcourseI‘mright,’theEarthwormsaid.‘Andwe’renotlikelytofindanythingaroundhereeither.Weshallgetthinnerandthinnerandthirstierandthirstier,andweshallalldieaslowandgrislydeathfromstarvation.Iamdyingalready.Iamslowlyshrivellingupforwantoffood.Personally,Iwouldratherdrown.’
‘Butgoodheavens,youmustbeblind!’saidJames.
‘YouknowverywellI‘mblind,’snappedtheEarthworm.‘There’snoneedtorubitin.’
‘Ididn’tmeanthat,’saidJamesquickly.‘I‘msorry.Butcan’tyouseethat–’
’See?’shoutedthepoorEarthworm.‘HowcanIseeifIamblind?’
Jamestookadeep,slowbreath.‘Can’tyourealize,’hesaidpatiently,‘thatwehaveenoughfoodheretolastusforweeksandweeks?’
‘Where?’theysaid.‘Where?’
‘Why,thepeachofcourse!Ourwholeshipismadeoffood!’
‘JumpingJehoshophat!’theycried.‘Weneverthoughtofthat!’
‘MydearJames,’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,layingafrontlegaffectionatelyonJames’sshoulder,‘Idon’tknowwhatwe’ddowithoutyou.
Youaresoclever.Ladiesandgentlemen–wearesavedagain!’
‘Wearemostcertainlynot!’saidtheEarthworm.‘Youmustbecrazy!Youcan’teattheship!It’stheonlythingthatiskeepingusup!’
‘Weshallstarveifwedon‘t!’saidtheCentipede.
‘Andweshalldrownifwedo!’criedtheEarthworm.
‘Ohdear,ohdear,’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘Nowwe’reworseoffthanbefore!’
‘Couldn’twejusteatalittlebitofit?’askedMissSpider.‘Iamsodreadfullyhungry.’
‘Youcaneatallyouwant,’Jamesanswered.‘Itwouldtakeusweeksandweekstomakeanysortofadentinthisenormouspeach.Surelyyoucanseethat?’
‘Goodheavens,he’srightagain!’criedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,clappinghishands.‘Itwouldtakeweeksandweeks!Ofcourseitwould!Butlet’snotgomakingalotofholesalloverthedeck.Ithinkwe’dbettersimplyscoopitoutofthattunneloverthere–theonethatwe‘vejustcomeupby.’
‘Anexcellentidea,’saidtheLadybird.
‘Whatareyoulookingsoworriedabout,Earthworm?’theCentipedeasked.‘What’stheproblem?’
‘Theproblemis…’theEarthwormsaid,‘theproblemis…well,theproblemisthatthereisnoproblem!’
Everyoneburstoutlaughing.‘Cheerup,Earthworm!’theysaid.‘Comeandeat!’Andtheyallwentovertothetunnelentranceandbeganscoopingoutgreatchunksofjuicy,golden-colouredpeachflesh.
‘Oh,marvellous!’saidtheCentipede,stuffingitintohismouth.
‘Dee-licious!’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘Justfabulous!’saidtheGlow-worm.
‘Ohmy!’saidtheLadybirdprimly.‘Whataheavenlytaste!’ShelookedupatJames,andshesmiled,andJamessmiledbackather.Theysatdownonthedecktogether,bothofthemchewingawayhappily.‘Youknow,James,’theLadybirdsaid,‘upuntilthismoment,Ihaveneverinmylifetastedanythingexceptthosetinylittlegreenfliesthatliveonrosebushes.Theyhaveaperfectlydelightfulflavour.Butthispeachisevenbetter.’
‘Isn’titglorious!’MissSpidersaid,comingovertojointhem.‘Personally,Ihadalwaysthoughtthatabig,juicy,caught-in-the-webbluebottlewasthefinestdinnerintheworld–untilItastedthis.’
‘Whataflavour!’theCentipedecried.‘It’sterrific!There’snothinglikeit!Thereneverhasbeen!AndIshouldknowbecauseIpersonallyhavetastedallthefinestfoodsintheworld!’Whereupon,theCentipede,withhismouthfullofpeachandwithjuicerunningdown
alloverhischin,suddenlyburstintosong:
‘I‘veeatenmanystrangeandscrumptiousdishesinmytime,
Likejelliedgnatsanddandypratsandearwigscookedinslime,
Andmicewithrice–they’rereallynice
Whenroastedintheirprime.
(Butdon’tforgettosprinklethemwithjustapinchofgrime.)
‘I‘veeatenfreshmudburgersbythegreatestcooksthereare,
Andscrambleddregsandstinkbugs’eggsandhornetsstewedintar,
Andpailsofsnailsandlizards’tails,Andbeetlesbythejar.
(Abeetleisimprovedbyjustasplashofvinegar.)
‘IofteneatboiledslobbagesThey’regrandwhenservedbeside
Minceddoodlebugsandcurriedslugs.Andhaveyouevertried
Mosquitoes’toesandwampfishroesMostdelicatelyfried?
(Theonlytroubleistheydisagreewithmyinside.)
‘I‘mmadforcrispywasp-stingsonapieceofbutteredtoast,
Andpickledspinesofporcupines.Andthenagorgeousroast
Ofdragon’sflesh,wellhung,notfresh–
Itcostsapoundatmost.
(Andcomestoyouinbarrelsifyouorderitbypost.)
‘Icravethetastytentaclesofoctopifortea
Ilikehot-dogs,ILOVEhot-frogs,andsurelyyou’llagree
Aplateofsoilwithengineoil’s
Asuperrecipe.
(Ihardlyneedtomentionthatifspracticallyfree.)
‘FordinneronmybirthdayshallItellyouwhatIchose:
Hotnoodlesmadefrompoodlesonasliceofgardenhose–
Andarathersmellyjelly
Madeofarmadillo’stoes.
(Thejellyisdelicious,butyouhavetoholdyournose.)
‘Nowcomes,’theCentipededeclared,‘theburdenofmyspeech:
Thesefoodsarerarebeyondcompare–somearerightoutofreach;
Butthere’snodoubtI’dgowithout
Amillionplatesofeach
Foronesmallmite,
Onetinybite,
OfthisFANTASTICPEACH!’
Everybodywasfeelinghappynow.Thesunwasshiningbrightlyoutofasoftblueskyandthedaywascalm.Thegiantpeach,withthesunlightglintingonitsside,waslikeamassivegoldenballsailinguponasilversea.
Nineteen
‘Look!’criedtheCentipedejustastheywerefinishingtheirmeal.‘Lookatthatfunnythinblackthingglidingthroughthewateroverthere!’
Theyallswungroundtolook.
‘Therearetwoofthem,’saidMissSpider.
‘Therearelotsofthem!’saidtheLadybird.
‘Whatarethey?’askedtheEarthworm,gettingworried.
‘Theymustbesomekindoffish,’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘Perhapstheyhavecomealongtosayhello.’
‘Theyaresharks!’criedtheEarthworm.‘I’llbetyouanythingyoulikethattheyaresharksandtheyhavecomealongtoeatusup!’
‘Whatabsoluterot!’theCentipedesaid,buthisvoiceseemedsuddenlytohavebecomealittleshaky,andhewasn’tlaughing.
‘Iampositivetheyaresharks!’saidtheEarthworm.Tjustknowtheyaresharks!’
Andso,inactualfact,dideverybodyelse,buttheyweretoofrightenedtoadmitit.
Therewasashortsilence.Theyallpeereddownanxiouslyatthesharkswhowerecruisingslowlyroundandroundthepeach.
‘Justassumingthattheyaresharks,’theCentipedesaid,‘therestillcan’tpossiblybeanydangerifwestayuphere.’
Butevenashespoke,oneofthosethinblackfinssuddenlychanged
directionandcamecuttingswiftlythroughthewaterrightuptothesideofthepeachitself.Thesharkpausedandstaredupatthecompanywithsmallevileyes.
‘Goaway!’theyshouted.‘Goaway,youfilthybeast!’
Slowly,almostlazily,thesharkopenedhismouth(whichwasbigenoughtohaveswallowedaperambulator)andmadealungeatthepeach.
Theyallwatched,aghast.
Andnow,asthoughatasignalfromtheleader,alltheothersharkscameswimmingintowardsthepeach,andtheyclusteredarounditandbegantoattackitfuriously.Theremusthavebeentwentyorthirtyofthematleast,allpushingandfightingandlashingtheirtailsandchurningthewaterintoafroth.
Panicandpandemoniumbrokeoutimmediatelyontopofthepeach.
‘Oh,wearefinishednow!’criedMissSpider,wringingherfeet.‘Theywilleatupthewholepeachandthenthere’llbenothingleftforustostandonandthey’llstartonus!’
‘Sheisright!’shoutedtheLadybird.‘Wearelostforever!’
‘Oh,Idon’twanttobeeaten!’wailedtheEarthworm.‘ButtheywilltakemefirstofallbecauseIamsofatandjuicyandIhavenobones!’
‘Istherenothingwecando?’askedtheLadybird,appealingtoJames.‘Surelyyoucanthinkofawayoutofthis.’
SuddenlytheywerealllookingatJames.
‘Think!’beggedMissSpider.‘Think,James,think!’
‘Comeon,’saidtheCentipede.‘Comeon,James.Theremustbesomethingwecando.’
Theireyeswaiteduponhim,tense,anxious,patheticallyhopeful.
Twenty
‘ThereissomethingthatIbelievewemighttry,’JamesHenryTrottersaidslowly.‘I‘mnotsayingit’llwork…’
‘Tellus!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Tellusquick!’
‘We’lltryanythingyousay!’saidtheCentipede.‘Buthurry,hurry,hurry!’
‘Bequietandlettheboyspeak!’saidtheLadybird.‘Goon,James.’
Theyallmovedalittleclosertohim.Therewasalongishpause.
‘Goon!’theycriedfrantically.‘Goon!’
Andallthetimewhiletheywerewaitingtheycouldhearthesharksthreshingaroundinthewaterbelowthem.Itwasenoughtomakeanyonefrantic.
‘Comeon,James,’theLadybirdsaid,coaxinghim.
I…I…I‘mafraidit’snogoodafterall,’Jamesmurmured,shakinghishead.‘I‘mterriblysorry.Iforgot.Wedon’thaveanystring.We’dneedhundredsofyardsofstringtomakethiswork.’
‘Whatsortofstring?’askedtheOld-Green-Grasshoppersharply.
‘Anysort,justsolongasit’sstrong.’
‘Butmydearboy,that’sexactlywhatwedohave!We‘vegotallyouwant!’
‘How?Where?’
‘TheSilkworm!’criedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘Didn’tyouevernoticetheSilkworm?She’sstilldownstairs!Shenevermoves!Shejust
liestheresleepingalldaylong,butwecaneasilywakeherupandmakeherspin!’
‘Andwhataboutme,mayIask?’saidMissSpider.‘IcanspinjustaswellasanySilkworm.What’smore,Icanspinpatterns.’
‘Canyoumakeenoughbetweenyou?’askedJames.
‘Asmuchasyouwant.’
‘Andquickly?’
‘Ofcourse!Ofcourse!’
‘Andwoulditbestrong?’
‘Thestrongestthereis!It’sasthickasyourfinger!Butwhy?Whatareyougoingtodo?’
‘I‘mgoingtoliftthispeachclearoutofthewater!’Jamesannouncedfirmly.
‘You’remad!’criedtheEarthworm.
‘It’souronlychance.’
‘Theboy’scrazy.’
‘He’sjoking.’
‘Goon,James,’theLadybirdsaidgently.‘Howareyougoingtodoit?’
‘Skyhooks,Isuppose,’jeeredtheCentipede.
‘Seagulls,’Jamesansweredcalmly.‘Theplaceisfullofthem.Lookupthere!’
Theyalllookedupandsawagreatmassofseagullswheelingroundandroundinthesky.
‘I‘mgoingtotakealongsilkstring,’Jameswenton,‘andI‘mgoingtolooponeendofitroundaseagull’sneck.AndthenI‘mgoingtotietheotherendtothestemofthepeach.’Hepointedtothepeachstem,whichwasstandinguplikeashortthickmastinthemiddleofthedeck.
‘ThenI‘mgoingtogetanotherseagullanddothesamethingagain,thenanotherandanother–’
‘Ridiculous!’theyshouted.
‘Absurd!’
‘Poppycock!’
‘Balderdash!’
‘Madness!’
AndtheOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid,‘Howcanafewseagullsliftanenormousthinglikethisupintotheair,andallofusaswell?Itwouldtakehundreds…thousands…’
‘Thereisnoshortageofseagulls,’Jamesanswered.‘Lookforyourself.We’llprobablyneedfourhundred,fivehundred,sixhundred…maybeevenathousand…Idon’tknow…Ishallsimplygoonhookingthemuptothestemuntilwehaveenoughtoliftus.They’llbeboundtoliftusintheend.It’slikeballoons.Yougivesomeoneenoughballoonstohold,Imeanreallyenough,thenuphegoes.Andaseagullhasfarmoreliftingpowerthanaballoon.Ifonlywehavethetimetodoit.Ifonlywearenotsunkfirstbythoseawfulsharks…’
‘You’reabsolutelyoffyourhead!’saidtheEarthworm.
‘Howonearthdoyouproposetogetaloopofstringroundaseagull’sneck?Isupposeyou’regoingtoflyupthereyourselfandcatchit!’
‘Theboy’sdotty!’saidtheCentipede.
‘Lethimfinish,’saidtheLadybird.‘Goon,James.Howwouldyoudoit?’
‘Withbait.’
‘Bait!Whatsortofbait?’
‘Withaworm,ofcourse.Seagullsloveworms,didn’tyouknowthat?Andluckilyforus,wehaveherethebiggest,fattest,pinkest,juiciestEarthwormintheworld.’
‘Youcanstoprightthere!’theEarthwormsaidsharply.‘That’squiteenough!’
‘Goon,’theotherssaid,beginningtogrowinterested.‘Goon!’
‘Theseagullshavealreadyspottedhim,’Jamescontinued.‘That’swhytherearesomanyofthemcirclinground.Buttheydaren’tcomedowntogethimwhilealltherestofusarestandinghere.Sothisiswhat–’
‘Stop!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Stop,stop,stop!Iwon’thaveit!Irefuse!I–I–I–I–’
‘Bequiet!’saidtheCentipede.‘Mindyourownbusiness!’
‘Ilikethat!’
‘MydearEarthworm,you’regoingtobeeatenanyway,sowhatdifferencedoesitmakewhetherit’ssharksorseagulls?’
‘Iwon’tdoit!’
‘Whydon’twehearwhattheplanisfirst?’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘Idon’tgiveahootwhattheplanis!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Iamnotgoingtobepeckedtodeathbyabunchofseagulls!’
‘Youwillbeamartyr,’saidtheCentipede.‘Ishallrespectyoufortherestofmylife.’
‘SowillI,’saidMissSpider.‘Andyournamewillbeinallthenewspapers.Earthwormgiveslifetosavefriends…’
‘Buthewon’thavetogivehislife,’Jamestoldthem.‘Nowlistentome.Thisiswhatwe’lldo…’
Twenty-one
‘Why,it’sabsolutelybrilliant!’criedtheOld-Green-GrasshopperwhenJameshadexplainedhisplan.
‘Theboy’sagenius!’theCentipedeannounced.‘NowIcankeepmybootsonafterall.’
‘Oh,Ishallbepeckedtodeath!’wailedthepoorEarthworm.
‘Ofcourseyouwon‘t.’
‘Iwill,IknowIwill!AndIwon’tevenbeabletoseethemcomingatmebecauseIhavenoeyes!’
JameswentoverandputanarmgentlyroundtheEarthworm’sshoulders.‘Iwon’tletthemtouchyou,’hesaid.‘IpromiseIwon‘t.Butwe‘vegottohurry!Lookdownthere!’
Thereweremoresharksthanevernowaroundthepeach.Thewaterwasboilingwiththem.Theremusthavebeenninetyorahundredatleast.Andtothetravellersupontop,itcertainlyseemedasthoughthepeachweresinkinglowerandlowerintothewater.
‘Actionstations!’Jamesshouted.‘Jumptoit!There’snotamomenttolose!’Hewasthecaptainnow,andeveryoneknewit.Theywoulddowhateverhetoldthem.
‘AllhandsbelowdeckexceptEarthworm!’heordered.
‘Yes,yes!’theysaideagerlyastheyscuttledintothetunnelentrance.‘Gomeon!Let’shurry!’
‘Andyou–Centipede!’Jamesshouted.‘HopdownstairsandgetthatSilkwormtoworkatonce!Tellhertospinasshe’sneverspunbefore!Ourlivesdependuponit!Andthesameappliestoyou,MissSpider!Hurryondown!Startspinning.’
Twenty-two
Inafewminuteseverythingwasready.
Itwasveryquietnowonthetopofthepeach.Therewasnobodyinsight–nobodyexcepttheEarthworm.
OnehalfoftheEarthworm,lookinglikeagreat,thick,juicy,pinksausage,layinnocentlyinthesunforalltheseagullstosee.
Theotherhalfofhimwasdanglingdownthetunnel.
JameswascrouchingclosebesidetheEarthworminthetunnelentrance,justbelowthesurface,waitingforthefirstseagull.Hehadaloopofsilkstringinhishands.
TheOld-Green-GrasshopperandtheLadybirdwerefurtherdownthetunnel,holdingontotheEarthworm’stail,readytopullhimquicklyinoutofdangerassoonasJamesgavetheword.
Andfarbelow,inthegreatstoneofthepeach,theGlow-wormwaslightinguptheroomsothatthetwospinners,theSilkwormandMissSpider,couldseewhattheyweredoing.TheCentipedewasdowntheretoo,exhortingthembothfranticallytogreaterefforts,andeverynowandagainJamescouldhearhisvoicecomingupfaintlyfromthedepths,shouting,‘Spin,Silkworm,spin,yougreatfatlazybrute!Faster,faster,orwe’llthrowyoutothesharks!’
‘Herecomesthefirstseagull!’whisperedJames.‘Keepstillnow,Earthworm.Keepstill.Therestofyougetreadytopull.’
‘Pleasedon’tletitspikeme,’beggedtheEarthworm.
‘Iwon‘t,Iwon‘t.Ssshh…’
Outofthecornerofoneeye,JameswatchedtheseagullasitcameswoopingdowntowardstheEarthworm.Andthensuddenlyitwassoclosethathecouldseeitssmallblackeyesanditscurvedbeak,andthebeakwasopen,readytograbanicepieceoffleshoutoftheEarthworm’sback.
‘Pull!’shoutedJames.’
TheOld-Green-GrasshopperandtheLadybirdgavetheEarthworm’stailanenormoustug,andlikemagictheEarthwormdisappearedintothetunnel.Atthesametime,upwentJames’shandandtheseagullflewrightintotheloopofsilkthathewasholdingout.Theloop,whichhadbeencleverlymade,tightenedjusttherightamount(butnottoomuch)arounditsneck,andtheseagullwascaptured.
‘Hooray!’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,peeringoutofthetunnel.‘Welldone,James!’
UpflewtheseagullwithJamespayingoutthesilkstringasitwent.Hegaveitaboutfiftyyardsandthentiedthestringtothestemofthepeach.
‘Nextone!’heshouted,jumpingbackintothetunnel.‘Upyougetagain,Earthworm!Bringupsomemoresilk,Centipede!’
‘Oh,Idon’tlikethisatall,’wailedtheEarthworm.‘Itonlyjustmissedme!Ievenfeltthewindonmybackasitwentswishingpast!’
‘Ssshh!’whisperedJames.‘Keepstill!Herecomesanotherone!’
Sotheydiditagain.
Andagain,andagain,andagain.
Andtheseagullskeptcoming,andJamescaughtthemoneaftertheotherandtetheredthemtothepeachstem.
‘Onehundredseagulls!’heshouted,wipingthesweatfromhisface.
‘Keepgoing!’theycried.‘Keepgoing,James!’
‘Twohundredseagulls!’
‘Threehundredseagulls!’
‘Fourhundredseagulls!’
Thesharks,asthoughsensingthattheywereindangeroflosingtheirprey,werehurlingthemselvesatthepeachmorefuriouslythanever,andthepeachwassinkinglowerandlowerstillinthewater.
‘Fivehundredseagulls!’Jamesshouted.
‘Silkwormsaysshe’srunningoutofsilk!’yelledtheCentipedefrombelow.‘Shesaysshecan’tkeepitupmuchlonger.NorcanMissSpider!’
‘Tellthemthey‘vegotto!’Jamesanswered.‘Theycan’tstopnow!’
‘We’relifting!’somebodyshouted.
‘No,we’renot!’
‘Ifeltit!’
‘Putonanotherseagull,quick!’
‘Quiet,everybody!Quiet!Here’sonecomingnow!’
Thiswasthefivehundredandfirstseagull,andthemomentthatJamescaughtitandtetheredittothestemwithalltheothers,thewholeenormouspeachsuddenlystartedrisingupslowlyoutofthewater.
‘Lookout!Herewego!Holdon,boys!’
Butthenitstopped.
Andthereithung.
Ithoveredandswayed,butitwentnohigher.
Thebottomofitwasjusttouchingthewater.Itwaslikeadelicatelybalancedscalethatneededonlythetiniestpushtotipitonewayortheother.
‘Onemorewilldoit!’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,lookingoutofthetunnel.‘We’realmostthere!’
Andnowcamethebigmoment.Quickly,thefivehundredandsecondseagullwascaughtandharnessedtothepeach-stem…
Andthensuddenly…
Butslowly…
Majestically…
Likesomefabulousgoldenballoon…
Withalltheseagullsstrainingatthestringsabove…
Thegiantpeachroseupdrippingoutofthewaterandbeganclimbingtowardstheheavens.
Twenty-three
Inaflash,everybodywasupontop.
‘Oh,isn’titbeautiful!’theycried.
‘Whatamarvellousfeeling!’
‘Good-bye,sharks!’
‘Oh,boy,thisisthewaytotravel!’
MissSpider,whowasliterallysquealingwithexcitement,grabbedtheCentipedebythewaistandthetwoofthemstarteddancingroundandroundthepeachstemtogether.TheEarthwormstooduponhistailanddidasortofwriggleofjoyallbyhimself.TheOld-Green-Grasshopperkepthoppinghigherandhigherintheair.TheLadybirdrushedoverandshookJameswarmlybythehand.TheGlow-worm,whoatthebestoftimeswasaveryshyandsilentcreature,satglowingwithpleasurenearthetunnelentrance.EventheSilkworm,lookingwhiteandthinandcompletelyexhausted,camecreepingoutofthetunneltowatchthismiraculousascent.
Upanduptheywent,andsoontheywereashighasthetopofachurchsteepleabovetheocean.
‘I‘mabitworriedaboutthepeach,’Jamessaidtotheothersassoonasallthedancingandtheshoutinghadstopped.‘Iwonderhowmuchdamagethosesharkshavedonetoitunderneath.It’squiteimpossibletotellfromuphere.’
‘Whydon’tIgooverthesideandmakeaninspection?’MissSpidersaid.‘It’llbenotroubleatall,Iassureyou.’Andwithoutwaitingfor
ananswer,shequicklyproducedalengthofsilkthreadandattachedtheendofittothepeachstem.‘I’llbebackinajiffy,’shesaid,andthenshewalkedcalmlyovertotheedgeofthepeachandjumpedoff,payingoutthethreadbehindherasshefell.
Theotherscrowdedanxiouslyaroundtheplacewhereshehadgoneover.
‘Wouldn’titbedreadfulifthethreadbroke,’theLadybirdsaid.
Therewasaratherlongsilence.
‘Areyouallright,MissSpider?’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘Yes,thankyou!’hervoiceansweredfrombelow.‘I‘mcomingupnow!’Andupshecame,climbingfootoverfootupthesilkthread,andatthesametimetuckingthethreadbackcleverlyintoherbodyassheclimbedpastit.
‘Isitawful?’theyaskedher.‘Isitalleatenaway?Aretheregreatholesiniteverywhere?’
MissSpiderclamberedbackontothedeckwithapleasedbutalsoaratherpuzzledlookonherface.‘Youwon’tbelievethis,’shesaid,‘butactuallythere’shardlyanydamagedownthereatall!Thepeachisalmostuntouched!Therearejustafewtinypiecesoutofithereandthere,butnothingmore.’
‘Youmustbemistaken,’Jamestoldher.
‘Ofcourseshe’smistaken!’theCentipedesaid.
‘IpromiseyouI‘mnot,’MissSpideranswered.
‘Buttherewerehundredsofsharksaroundus!’
‘Theychurnedthewaterintoafroth!’
‘Wesawtheirgreatmouthsopeningandshutting!’
‘Idon’tcarewhatyousaw,’MissSpideranswered.‘Theycertainlydidn’tdomuchdamagetothepeach.’
‘Thenwhydidwestartsinking?’theCentipedeasked.
‘Perhapswedidn’tstartsinking,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersuggested.‘Perhapswewereallsofrightenedthatwesimplyimaginedit.’
This,inpointoffact,wasclosertothetruththananyofthemknew.Ashark,yousee,hasanextremelylongsharpnose,anditsmouthissetveryawkwardlyunderneathitsfaceandalongwayback.Thismakesitmoreorlessimpossibleforittogetitsteethintoavastsmoothcurvingsurfacesuchasthesideofapeach.Evenifthecreatureturnsontoitsbackitstillcan’tdoit,becausethenosealwaysgetsintheway.Ifyouhaveeverseenasmalldogtryingtogetitsteethintoanenormousball,thenyouwillbeabletoimagineroughlyhowitwaswiththesharksandthepeach.
‘Itmusthavebeensomekindofmagic,’theLadybirdsaid.‘Theholesmusthavehealedupbythemselves.’
‘Oh,look!There’sashipbelowus!’shoutedJames.
Everybodyrushedtothesideandpeeredover.Noneofthemhadeverseenashipbefore.
‘Itlookslikeabigone.’
‘It’sgotthreefunnels.’
‘Youcanevenseethepeopleonthedecks!’
‘Let’swavetothem.Doyouthinktheycanseeus?’
NeitherJamesnoranyoftheothersknewit,buttheshipthatwasnowpassingbeneaththemwasactuallytheQueenMarysailingoutoftheEnglishChannelonherwaytoAmerica.AndonthebridgeoftheQueenMary,theastonishedCaptainwasstandingwithagroupofhisofficers,allofthemgapingatthegreatroundballhoveringoverhead.
‘Idon’tlikeit,’theCaptainsaid.
‘NordoI,’saidtheFirstOfficer.
‘Doyouthinkit’sfollowingus?’saidtheSecondOfficer.
‘ItellyouIdon’tlikeit,’mutteredtheCaptain.
‘Itcouldbedangerous,’theFirstOfficersaid.
‘That’sit!’criedtheCaptain.‘It’sasecretweapon!Holycats!SendamessagetotheQueenatonce!Thecountrymustbewarned!Andgivemeraytelescope.’
TheFirstOfficerhandedthetelescopetotheCaptain.TheCaptainputittohiseye.
‘There’sbirdseverywhere!’hecried.‘Thewholeskyisteemingwithbirds!Whatintheworldaretheydoing?Andwait!Waitasecond!Therearepeopleonit!Icanseethemmoving!There’sa–a–doIhavethisdarnedthingfocusedright?Itlookslikealittleboyinshorttrousers!Yes,Icandistinctlyseealittleboyinshorttrousersstandingupthere!Andthere’sa–there’sa–there’sa–a–a–asortofgiantladybird!’
‘Nowjustaminute,Captain!’theFirstOfficersaid.
‘Andacolossalgreengrasshopper!’
‘Captain!’theFirstOfficersaidsharply.‘Captain,please!’
‘Andamammothspider!’
‘Ohdear,he’sbeenatthewhiskyagain,’whisperedtheSecondOfficer.
‘Andanenormous–asimplyenormouscentipede!’screamedtheCaptain.
‘CalltheShip’sDoctor,’theFirstOfficersaid.‘OurCaptainisnotwell.’
Amomentlater,thegreatroundballdisappearedintoacloud,andthepeopleontheshipneversawitagain.
Twenty-four
Butuponthepeachitself,everyonewasstillhappyandexcited.
‘Iwonderwherewe’llfinishupthistime,’theEarthwormsaid.
‘Whocares?’theyanswered.‘Seagullsalwaysgobacktothelandsoonerorlater.’
Upanduptheywent,highabovethehighestclouds,thepeachswayinggentlyfromsidetosideasitfloatedalong.
‘Wouldn’tthisbeaperfecttimeforalittlemusic?’theLadybirdasked.‘Howaboutit,OldGrasshopper?’
‘Withpleasure,dearlady,’theOld-Green-Grasshopperanswered,bowingfromthewaist.
‘Oh,hooray!He’sgoingtoplayforus!’theycried,andimmediatelythewholecompanysatthemselvesdowninacirclearoundtheOldGreenMusician–andtheconcertbegan.
Fromthemomentthatthefirstnotewasstruck,theaudiencebecamecompletelyspellbound.AndasforJames,neverhadheheardsuchbeautifulmusicasthis!Inthegardenathomeonsummerevenings,hehadlistenedmanytimestothesoundofgrasshopperschirpinginthegrass,andhehadalwayslikedthenoisethattheymade.Butthiswasadifferentkindofnoisealtogether.Thiswasrealmusic–chords,harmonies,tunes,andalltherestofit.
AndwhatawonderfulinstrumenttheOld-Green-Grasshopperwasplayingupon.Itwaslikeaviolin!Itwasalmostexactlyasthoughhewereplayinguponaviolin!
Thebowoftheviolin,thepartthatmoved,washisbackleg.Thestringsoftheviolin,thepartthatmadethesound,wastheedgeofhiswing.
Hewasusingonlythetopofhisbackleg(thethigh),andhewasstrokingthisupanddownagainsttheedgeofhiswingwithincredibleskill,sometimesslowly,sometimesfast,butalwayswiththesameeasyflowingaction.Itwaspreciselythewayacleverviolinistwouldhaveusedhisbow;andthemusiccamepouringoutandfilledthewholeblueskyaroundthemwithmagicmelodies.
Whenthefirstpartwasfinished,everyoneclappedmadly,andMissSpiderstoodupandshouted,‘Bravo!Encore!Giveussomemore!’
‘Didyoulikethat,James?’theOld-Green-Grasshopperasked,smilingatthesmallboy.
‘Oh,Ilovedit!’Jamesanswered.‘Itwasbeautiful!Itwasasthoughyouhadarealviolininyourhands!’
‘Arealviolin!’theOld-Green-Grasshoppercried.‘Goodheavens,Ilikethat!Mydearboy,Iamarealviolin!Itisapartofmyownbody!’
‘Butdoallgrasshoppersplaytheirmusiconviolins,thesamewayasyoudo?’Jamesaskedhim.
‘No,’heanswered,‘notall.Ifyouwanttoknow,Ihappentobea“short-horned”grasshopper.Ihavetwoshortfeelerscomingoutofmyhead.Canyouseethem?Theretheyare.Theyarequiteshort,aren’tthey?That’swhytheycallmea“short-horn”.Andwe“short-horns”aretheonlyoneswhoplayourmusicintheviolinstyle,usingabow.My“long-horned”relatives,theoneswhohavelongcurvyfeelerscomingoutoftheirheads,maketheirmusicsimplybyrubbingtheedgesoftheirtwotopwingstogether.Theyarenotviolinists,theyare
wing-rubbers.Andaratherinferiornoisethesewing-rubbersproduce,too,ifImaysayso.Itsoundsmorelikeabanjothanafiddle.’
‘Howfascinatingthisallis!’criedJames.‘AndtothinkthatupuntilnowIhadneverevenwonderedhowagrasshoppermadehissounds.’
‘Mydearyoungfellow,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaidgently,‘thereareawholelotofthingsinthisworldofoursthatyouhaven’tstartedwonderingaboutyet.Where,forexample,doyouthinkthatIkeepmyears?’
‘Yourears?Why,inyourhead,ofcourse.’
Everyoneburstoutlaughing.
‘Youmeanyoudon’tevenknowthat?’criedtheCentipede.
‘Tryagain,’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,smilingatJames.
‘Youcan’tpossiblykeepthemanywhereelse?’
‘Oh,can’tI?’
‘Well–Igiveup.Wheredoyoukeepthem?’
‘Righthere,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.‘Oneoneachsideofmytummy.’
‘It’snottrue!’
‘Ofcourseit’strue.What’ssopeculiaraboutthat?Yououghttoseewheremycousinsthecricketsandthekatydidskeeptheirs.’
‘Wheredotheykeepthem?’
‘Intheirlegs.Oneineachfrontleg,justbelowtheknee.’
‘Youmeanyoudidn’tknowthateither?’theCentipedesaidscornfully.
‘You’rejoking,’Jamessaid.‘Nobodycouldpossiblyhavehisearsinhislegs.’
‘Whynot?’
‘Because…becauseit’sridiculous,that’swhy.’
‘YouknowwhatIthinkisridiculous?’theCentipedesaid,grinningawayasusual.‘Idon’tmeantoberude,butIthinkitisridiculoustohaveearsonthesidesofone’shead.Itcertainlylooksridiculous.Yououghttotakeapeekinthemirrorsomedayandseeforyourself.’
‘Pest!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Whymustyoualwaysbesorudeandrambunctioustoeveryone?YououghttoapologizetoJamesatonce.’
Twenty-five
Jamesdidn’twanttheEarthwormandtheCentipedetogetintoanotherargument,sohesaidquicklytotheEarthworm,‘Tellme,doyouplayanykindofmusic?’
‘No,butIdootherthings,someofwhicharereallyquiteextraordinary’theEarthwormsaid,brightening.
‘Suchaswhat?’askedJames.
‘Well,’theEarthwormsaid.‘Nexttimeyoustandinafieldorinagardenandlookaroundyou,thenjustrememberthis:thateverygrainofsoiluponthesurfaceoftheland,everytinylittlebitofsoilthatyoucanseehasactuallypassedthroughthebodyofanEarthwormduringthelastfewyears!Isn’tthatwonderful?’
‘It’snotpossible!’saidJames.
‘Mydearboy,it’safact.’
‘Youmeanyouactuallyswallowsoil?’
‘Likemad,’theEarthwormsaidproudly.‘Inoneendandouttheother.’
‘Butwhat’sthepoint?’
‘Whatdoyoumean,what’sthepoint?’
‘Whydoyoudoit?’
‘Wedoitforthefarmers.Itmakesthesoilniceandlightandcrumblysothatthingswillgrowwellinit.Ifyoureallywanttoknow,thefarmerscouldn’tdowithoutus.Weareessential.Wearevital.So
itisonlynaturalthatthefarmershouldloveus.Helovesusevenmore,Ibelieve,thanhelovestheLadybird.’
‘TheLadybird!’saidJames,turningtolookather.‘Dotheyloveyou,too?’
‘Iamtoldthattheydo,’theLadybirdansweredmodestly,blushingallover.‘Infact,IunderstandthatinsomeplacesthefarmersloveussomuchthattheygooutandbuyliveLadybirdsbythesackfulandtakethemhomeandsetthemfreeintheirfields.TheyareverypleasedwhentheyhavelotsofLadybirdsintheirfields.’
‘Butwhy?’Jamesasked.
‘Becausewegobbleupallthenastylittleinsectsthataregobblingupallthefarmer’scrops.Ithelpsenormously,andweourselvesdon’tchargeapennyforourservices.’
‘Ithinkyou’rewonderful,’Jamestoldher.‘CanIaskyouonespecialquestion?’
‘Pleasedo.’
‘Well,isitreallytruethatIcantellhowoldaLadybirdisbycountingherspots?’
‘Ohno,that’sjustachildren’sstory,’theLadybirdsaid.‘Weneverchangeourspots.Someofus,ofcourse,arebornwithmorespots
thanothers,butweneverchangethem.ThenumberofspotsthataLadybirdhasissimplyawayofshowingwhichbranchofthefamilyshebelongsto.I,forexample,asyoucanseeforyourself,amaNine-SpottedLadybird.Iamverylucky.Itisafinethingtobe.’
‘Itis,indeed,’saidJames,gazingatthebeautifulscarletshellwiththenineblackspotsonit.
‘Ontheotherhand,’theLadybirdwenton,’someofmylessfortunaterelativeshavenomorethantwospotsaltogetherontheirshells!Canyouimaginethat?TheyarecalledTwo-SpottedLadybirds,andverycommonandill-manneredtheyare,Iregrettosay.Andthen,ofcourse,youhavetheFive-SpottedLadybirdsaswell.TheyaremuchnicerthantheTwo-Spottedones,althoughImyselffindthematrifletoosaucyformytaste.’
‘Buttheyareallofthemloved?’saidJames.
‘Yes,’theLadybirdansweredquietly.‘Theyareallofthemloved.’
‘Itseemsthatalmosteveryonearoundhereisloved!’saidJames.‘Hownicethisis!’
‘Notme!’criedtheCentipedehappily.‘IamapestandI‘mproudofit!Oh,Iamsuchashockingdreadfulpest!’
‘Hear,hear,’theEarthwormsaid.
‘Butwhataboutyou,MissSpider?’askedJames.‘Aren’tyoualsomuchlovedintheworld?’
‘Alas,no,’MissSpideranswered,sighinglongandloud.‘Iamnotlovedatall.AndyetIdonothingbutgood.AlldaylongIcatchfliesandmosquitoesinmywebs.Iamadecentperson.’
‘Iknowyouare,’saidJames.
‘ItisveryunfairthewayweSpidersaretreated,’MissSpiderwenton.‘Why,onlylastweekyourownhorribleAuntSpongeflushedmypoordearfatherdowntheplug-holeinthebathtub.’
‘Oh,howawful!’criedJames.
‘Iwatchedthewholethingfromacornerupintheceiling,’MissSpidermurmured.‘Itwasghastly.Weneversawhimagain.’Alargetearrolleddownhercheekandfellwithasplashonthefloor.
‘Butisitnotveryunluckytokillaspider?’Jamesinquired,lookingaroundattheothers.
‘Ofcourseit’sunluckytokillaspider!’shoutedtheCentipede.‘It’sabouttheunluckiestthinganyonecando.LookwhathappenedtoAuntSpongeaftershe’ddonethat!Bump!Weallfeltit,didn’twe,asthepeachwentoverher?Oh,whatalovelybumpthatmusthavebeenforyou,MissSpider!’
‘Itwasverysatisfactory,’MissSpideranswered.Willyousingusasongaboutit,please?’
SotheCentipededid.
‘AuntSpongewasterrificallyfat,
Andtremendouslyflabbyatthat.
Hertummyandwaist
Wereassoggyaspaste–
Itwasworseontheplacewhereshesat!
Soshesaid,“Imustmakemyselfflat.
Imustmakemyselfsleekasacat.
Ishalldowithoutdinner
Tomakemyselfthinner.”
Butalongcamethepeach!
Oh,thebeautifulpeach!
Andmadeherfarthinnerthanthat!’
‘Thatwasverynice,’MissSpidersaid.‘NowsingoneaboutAuntSpiker.’
‘Withpleasure,’theCentipedeanswered,grinning:
‘AuntSpikerwasthinasawire,
Anddryasabone,onlydrier.
Shewassolongandthin
Ifyoucarriedherin
Youcoulduseherforpokingthefire!
‘“Imustdosomethingquickly,”shefrowned.
‘IwantFAT.Iwantpounduponpound!
Imusteatlotsandlots
Ofmarshmallowsandchocs
TillIstartbulgingoutallaround.”
‘“Ah,yes,”sheannounced,“Ihavesworn
ThatI’llaltermyfigurebydawn!”
Criedthepeachwithasnigger,
“I’LLalteryourfigure–”
Andironedheroutonthelawn!’
EverybodyclappedandcalledoutformoresongsfromtheCentipede,whoatoncelaunchedintohisfavouritesongofall:
‘Onceuponatime
Whenpigswereswine
Andmonkeyschewedtobacco
Andhenstooksnuff
Tomakethemselvestough
Andtheduckssaidquack-quack-quacko,
Andporcupines
Drankfierywines
Andgoatsatetapioca
AndOldMotherHubbard
Gotstuckinthec–’
‘Lookout,Centipede!’criedJames.‘Lookout!’
Twenty-six
TheCentipede,whohadbegundancingwildlyroundthedeckduringthissong,hadsuddenlygonetooclosetothedownwardcurvingedgeofthepeach,andforthreeawfulsecondshehadstoodteeteringonthebrink,swinginghislegsfranticallyincirclesinanefforttostophimselffromfallingoverbackwardintospace.Butbeforeanyonecouldreachhim–downhewent!Hegaveashriekofterrorashefell,andtheothers,rushingtothesideandpeeringover,sawhispoorlongbodytumblingoverandoverthroughtheair,gettingsmallerandsmalleruntilitwasoutofsight.
‘Silkworm!’yelledJames.‘Quick!Startspinning!’
TheSilkwormsighed,forshewasstillverytiredfromspinningallthatsilkfortheseagulls,butshedidasshewastold.
‘I‘mgoingdownafterhim!’criedJames,grabbingthesilkstringasitstartedcomingoutoftheSilkwormandtyingtheendofitaroundhiswaist.‘TherestofyouholdontoSilkwormsoIdon’tpullheroverwithme,andlateron,ifyoufeelthreetugsonthestring,starthaulingmeupagain!’
Hejumped,andhewenttumblingdownaftertheCentipede,down,down,downtowardstheseabelow,andyoucanimaginehowquicklytheSilkwormhadtospintokeepupwiththespeedofhisfall.
‘We’llneverseeeitherofthemagain!’criedtheLadybird.‘Oh,dear!Ohdear!Justwhenwewereallsohappy,too!’
MissSpider,theGlow-worm,andtheLadybirdallbegantocry.SodidtheEarthworm.‘Idon’tcareabitabouttheCentipede,’the
Earthwormsobbed.‘ButIreallydidlovethatlittleboy.’
Verysoftly,theOld-Green-GrasshopperstartedtoplaytheFuneralMarchonhisviolin,andbythetimehehadfinished,everyone,includinghimself,wasinafloodoftears.
Suddenly,therecamethreesharptugsontherope.‘Pull!’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘Everyonegetbehindmeandpull!’
Therewasaboutamileofstringtobehauledin,buttheyallworkedlikemad,andintheend,overthesideofthepeach,thereappearedadripping-wetJameswithadripping-wetCentipedeclingingtohimtightlywithallforty-twoofhislegs.
‘Hesavedme!’gaspedtheCentipede.‘HeswamaroundinthemiddleoftheAtlanticOceanuntilhefoundme!’
‘Mydearboy,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid,pattingJamesontheback.‘Idocongratulateyou.’
‘Myboots!’criedtheCentipede.‘Justlookatmypreciousboots!
Theyareruinedbythewater!’
‘Bequiet!’theEarthwormsaid.‘Youareluckytobealive.’
‘Arewestillgoingupandup?’askedJames.
‘Wecertainlyare,’answeredtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘Andit’sbeginningtogetdark.’
‘Iknow.It’llsoonbenight.’
‘Whydon’tweallgodownbelowandkeepwarmuntiltomorrowmorning?’MissSpidersuggested.
‘No,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.‘Ithinkthatwouldbeveryunwise.Itwillbesaferifweallstayupherethroughthenightandkeepwatch.Then,ifanythinghappens,weshallanywaybereadyforit.’
Twenty-seven
JamesHenryTrotterandhiscompanionscrouchedclosetogetherontopofthepeachasthenightbeganclosinginaroundthem.Cloudslikemountainstoweredhighabovetheirheadsonallsides,mysterious,menacing,overwhelming.Graduallyitgrewdarkeranddarker,andthenapalethree-quartermooncameupoverthetopsofthecloudsandcastaneerielightoverthewholescene.Thegiantpeachswayedgentlyfromsidetosideasitfloatedalong,andthehundredsofsilkywhitestringsgoingupwardfromitsstemwerebeautifulinthemoonlight.Soalsowasthegreatflockofseagullsoverhead.
Therewasnotasoundanywhere.Travellinguponthepeachwasnotintheleastliketravellinginanaeroplane.Theaeroplanecomesclatteringandroaringthroughthesky,andwhatevermightbelurkingsecretlyupthereinthegreatcloud-mountainsgoesrunningforcoveratitsapproach.Thatiswhypeoplewhotravelinaeroplanesneverseeanything.
Butthepeach…ah,yes…thepeachwasasoft,stealthytraveller,makingnonoiseatallasitfloatedalong.Andseveraltimesduringthatlongsilentnightridehighupoverthemiddleoftheoceaninthemoonlight,Jamesandhisfriendssawthingsthatnoonehadeverseenbefore.
Once,astheydriftedsilentlypastamassivewhitecloud,theysawonthetopofitagroupofstrange,tall,wispy-lookingthingsthatwereabouttwicetheheightofordinarymen.Theywerenoteasytoseeatfirstbecausetheywerealmostaswhiteastheclouditself,butasthepeachsailedcloser,itbecameobviousthatthese‘things’wereactuallylivingcreatures–tall,wispy,wraithlike,shadowy,whitecreatureswholookedasthoughtheyweremadeoutofamixtureofcotton-woolandcandyflossandthinwhitehairs.
‘Oooooooooooooh!’theLadybirdsaid.‘Idon’tlikethisatall!’
‘Ssshh!’Jameswhisperedback.‘Don’tletthemhearyou!TheymustbeCloud-Men!’
‘Cloud-Men!’theymurmured,huddlingclosertogetherforcomfort.‘Ohdear,ohdear!’
‘I‘mgladI‘mblindandcan’tseethem,’theEarthwormsaid,‘orIwouldprobablyscream.’
‘Ihopetheydon’tturnroundandseeus,’MissSpiderstammered.
‘Doyouthinktheywouldeatus?’theEarthwormasked.
‘Theywouldeatyou,’theCentipedeanswered,grinning.‘Theywouldcutyouuplikeasalamiandeatyouinthinslices.’
ThepoorEarthwormbegantoquiveralloverwithfright.
‘Butwhataretheydoing?’theOld-Green-Grasshopperwhispered.
‘Idon’tknow,’Jamesansweredsoftly.‘Let’swatchandsee.’
TheCloud-Menwereallstandinginagroup,andtheyweredoingsomethingpeculiarwiththeirhands.First,theywouldreachout(allofthematonce)andgrabhandfulsofcloud.Thentheywouldrollthesehandfulsofcloudintheirfingersuntiltheyturnedintowhatlookedlikelargewhitemarbles.Thentheywouldtossthemarblestoonesideandquicklygrabmorebitsofcloudandstartoveragain.
Itwasallverysilentandmysterious.Thepileofmarblesbesidethemkeptgrowinglargerandlarger.Soontherewasatruckloadof
themthereatleast.
‘Theymustbeabsolutelymad!’theCentipedesaid.‘There’snothingtobeafraidofhere!’
‘Bequiet,youpest!’theEarthwormwhispered.‘Weshallallbeeateniftheyseeus!’
ButtheCloud-Menweremuchtoobusywithwhattheyweredoingtohavenoticedthegreatpeachfloatingsilentlyupbehindthem.
ThenthewatchersonthepeachsawoneoftheCloud-Menraisinghislongwispyarmsabovehisheadandtheyheardhimshouting,‘Allright,boys!That’senough!Gettheshovels!’AndalltheotherCloud-Menimmediatelyletoutastrangehigh-pitchedwhoopofjoyandstartedjumpingupanddownandwavingtheirarmsintheair.Thentheypickedupenormousshovelsandrushedovertothepileofmarblesandbeganshovellingthemasfastastheycouldoverthesideofthecloud,intospace.‘Downtheygo!’theychantedastheyworked.
‘Downtheygo!
Hailandsnow!
Freezesandsneezesandnoseswillblow!’
‘It’shailstones!’whisperedJamesexcitedly.‘They‘vebeenmakinghailstonesandnowtheyareshoweringthemdownontothepeopleintheworldbelow!’
‘Hailstones?’theCentipedesaid.‘That’sridiculous!Thisissummertime.Youdon’thavehailstonesinsummertime.’
‘Theyarepractisingforthewinter,’Jamestoldhim.
‘Idon’tbelieveit!’shoutedtheCentipede,raisinghisvoice.
‘Ssshh!’theotherswhispered.AndJamessaidsoftly,‘Forheaven’ssake,Centipede,don’tmakesomuchnoise.’
TheCentipederoaredwithlaughter.‘Thoseimbecilescouldn’thear
anything!’hecried.‘They’redeafasdoorknobs!Youwatch!’Andbeforeanyonecouldstophim,hehadcuppedhisfrontfeettohismouthandwasyellingattheCloud-Menasloudashecould.‘Idiots!’heyelled.‘Nincompoops!Half-wits!Blunderheads!Asses!Whatonearthdoyouthinkyou’redoingoverthere!’
Theeffectwasimmediate.TheCloud-Menjumpedroundasiftheyhadbeenstungbywasps.Andwhentheysawthegreatgoldenpeachfloatingpastthemnotfiftyyardsawayinthesky,theygaveayelpofsurpriseanddroppedtheirshovelstotheground.Andtheretheystoodwiththemoonlightstreamingdownalloverthem,absolutelymotionless,likeagroupoftallwhitehairystatues,staringandstaringatthegiganticfruitasitwentsailingby.
Thepassengersonthepeach(allexcepttheCentipede)satfrozenwithterror,lookingbackattheCloud-Menandwonderingwhatwasgoingtohappennext.
‘Nowyou‘vedoneit,youloathsomepest!’whisperedtheEarthwormtotheCentipede.
‘I‘mnotfrightenedofthem!’shoutedtheCentipede,andtoshoweverybodyonceagainthathewasn‘t,hestooduptohisfullheightandstarteddancingaboutandmakinginsultingsignsattheCloud-Menwithallforty-twoofhislegs.
ThisevidentlyinfuriatedtheCloud-Menbeyondbelief.Allatonce,theyspunroundandgrabbedgreathandfulsofhailstonesandrushedtotheedgeofthecloudandstartedthrowingthematthepeach,shriekingwithfuryallthetime.
‘Lookout!’criedJames.‘Quick!Liedown!Lieflatonthedeck!’
Itwasluckytheydid!Alargehailstonecanhurtyouasmuchasa
rockoralumpofleadifitisthrownhardenough–andmygoodness,howthoseCloud-Mencouldthrow!Thehailstonescamewhizzingthroughtheairlikebulletsfromamachine-gun,andJamescouldhearthemsmashingagainstthesidesofthepeachandburyingthemselvesinthepeachfleshwithhorriblesquelchingnoises–plop!plop!plop!plop!Andthenping!ping!ping!astheybouncedoffthepoorLadybird’sshellbecauseshecouldn’tlieasflatastheothers.Andthencrack!asoneofthemhittheCentipederightonthenoseandcrack!againasanotheronehithimsomewhereelse.
‘Ow!’hecried.‘Ow!Stop!Stop!Stop!’
ButtheCloud-Menhadnointentionofstopping.Jamescouldseethemrushingaboutonthecloudlikealotofhugehairyghosts,pickinguphailstonesfromthepile,dashingtotheedgeofthecloud,hurlingthehailstonesatthepeach,dashingbackagaintogetmore,andthen,whenthepileofstoneswasallgone,theysimplygrabbedhandfulsofcloudandmadeasmanymoreastheywanted,andmuchbiggeronesnow,someofthemaslargeascannonballs.
‘Quickly!’criedJames.‘Downthetunnelorwe’llallbewipedout!’
Therewasarushforthetunnelentrance,andhalfaminutelatereverybodywassafelydownstairsinsidethestoneofthepeach,tremblingwithfrightandlisteningtothenoiseofthehailstonesastheycamecrashingagainstthesideofthepeach.
‘I‘mawreck!’groanedtheCentipede.‘Iamwoundedallover!’
‘Itservesyouright,’saidtheEarthworm.
‘Wouldsomebodykindlylookandseeifmyshelliscracked?’theLadybirdsaid.
‘Giveussomelight!’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘Ican‘t!’wailedtheGlow-worm.‘They‘vebrokenmybulb!’
‘Thenputinanotherone!’theCentipedesaid.
‘Bequietamoment,’saidJames.‘Listen!Idobelievethey’renothittingusanymore!’
Theyallstoppedtalkingandlistened.Yes–thenoisehadceased.Thehailstoneswerenolongersmashingagainstthepeach.
‘We‘veleftthembehind!’
‘Theseagullsmusthavepulledusawayoutofdanger.
‘Hooray!Let’sgoupandsee!’
Cautiously,withJamesgoingfirst,theyallclimbedbackupthetunnel.Jamespokedhisheadoutandlookedaround.‘It’sallclear!’hecalled.‘Ican’tseethemanywhere!’
Twenty-eight
Onebyone,thetravellerscameoutagainontothetopofthepeachandgazedcarefullyaround.Themoonwasstillshiningasbrightlyasever,andtherewerestillplentyofhugeshimmeringcloud-mountainsonallsides.ButtherewerenoCloud-Meninsightnow.
‘Thepeachisleaking!’shoutedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,peeringovertheside.‘It’sfullofholesandthejuiceisdrippingouteverywhere!’
‘Thatdoesit!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Ifthepeachisleakingthenweshallsurelysink!’
‘Don’tbeanass!’theCentipedetoldhim.‘We’renotinthewaternow!’
‘Oh,look!’shoutedtheLadybird.‘Look,look,look!Overthere!’
Everybodyswungroundtolook.
Inthedistanceanddirectlyaheadofthem,theynowsawamostextraordinarysight.Itwasakindofarch,acolossalcurvy-shapedthingthatreachedhighupintotheskyandcamedownagainatbothends.Theendswererestinguponahugeflatcloudthatwasasbigasadesert.
‘Nowwhatintheworldisthat?’askedJames.
‘It’sabridge!’
‘It’sanenormoushoopcutinhalf!’
‘It’sagianthorseshoestandingupsidedown!’
‘StopmeifI‘mwrong,’murmuredtheCentipede,goingwhiteintheface,‘butmightthosenotbeCloud-Menclimbingalloverit?’
Therewasadreadfulsilence.Thepeachfloatedcloserandcloser.
‘TheyareCloud-Men!’
‘Therearehundredsofthem!’
‘Thousands!’
‘Millions!’
‘Idon’twanttohearaboutit!’shriekedthepoorblindEarthworm.‘I’dratherbeontheendofafishhookandusedasbaitthancomeupagainstthoseterriblecreaturesagain!’
‘I’dratherbefriedaliveandeatenbyaMexican!’wailedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘Pleasekeepquiet,’whisperedJames.‘It’souronlyhope.’
Theycrouchedverystillontopofthepeach,staringattheCloud-Men.Thewholesurfaceofthecloudwasliterallyswarmingwiththem,andtherewerehundredsmoreupaboveclimbingaboutonthatmonstrouscrazyarch.
‘Butwhatisthatthing?’whisperedtheLadybird.‘Andwhataretheydoingtoit?’
‘Idon’tcarewhatthey’redoingtoit!’theCentipedesaid,scuttlingovertothetunnelentrance.‘I‘mnotstayinguphere!Good-bye!’
Buttherestofthemweretoofrightenedortoohypnotizedbythewholeaffairtomakeamove.
‘Doyouknowwhat?’Jameswhispered.
‘What?’theysaid.‘What?’
‘Thatenormousarch–theyseemtobepaintingit!They‘vegotpotsofpaintandbigbrushes!Youlook!’
Andhewasquiteright.ThetravellerswerecloseenoughnowtoseethatthiswasexactlywhattheCloud-Menweredoing.Theyallhadhugebrushesintheirhandsandtheyweresplashingthepaintontothegreatcurvyarchinafrenzyofspeed,sofast,infact,thatinafewminutesthewholeofthearchbecamecoveredwiththemostgloriouscolours–reds,blues,greens,yellows,andpurples.
‘It’sarainbow!’everyonesaidatonce.‘Theyaremakingarainbow!’
‘Oh,isn’titbeautiful!’
‘Justlookatthosecolours!’
‘Centipede!’theyshouted.‘Youmustcomeupandseethis!’Theyweresoenthralledbythebeautyandbrillianceoftherainbowthattheyforgottokeeptheirvoiceslowanylonger.TheCentipedepokedhisheadcautiouslyoutofthetunnelentrance.
‘Well,well,well,’hesaid.‘I‘vealwayswonderedhowthosethingsweremade.Butwhyalltheropes?Whataretheydoingwiththoseropes?’
‘Goodheavens,theyarepushingitoffthecloud!’criedJames.‘Thereitgoes!Theyareloweringitdowntotheearthwithropes!’
‘AndI’lltellyousomethingelse,’theCentipedesaidsharply.‘IfI‘mnotgreatlymistaken,weourselvesaregoingtobumprightintoit!’
‘Blessmysoul,he’sright!’theOld-Green-Grasshopperexclaimed.
Therainbowwasnowdanglingintheairbelowthecloud.Thepeachwasalsojustbelowthelevelofthecloud,anditwasheading
directlytowardstherainbow,travellingratherfast.
‘Wearelost!’MissSpidercried,wringingherfeetagain.‘Theendhascome!’
‘Ican’tstandit!’wailedtheEarthworm.‘Tellmewhat’shappening!’
‘We’regoingtomissit!’shoutedtheLadybird.
‘No,we’renot!’
‘Yes,weare!’
‘Yes!–Yes!–No!–Oh,myheavens!’
‘Holdon,everybody!’Jamescalledout,andsuddenlytherewasatremendousthudasthepeachwentcrashingintothetopoftherainbow.Thiswasfollowedbyanawfulsplinteringnoiseastheenormousrainbowsnappedrightacrossthemiddleandbecametwoseparatepieces.
Thenextthingthathappenedwasextremlyunfortunate.TheropesthattheCloud-Menhadbeenusingforloweringtherainbowgottangledupwiththesilkstringsthatwentupfromthepeachtotheseagulls!Thepeachwastrapped!Panicandpandemoniumbrokeoutamongthetravellers,andJamesHenryTrotter,glancingupquickly,sawthefacesofathousandfuriousCloud-Menpeeringdownathimovertheedgeofthecloud.Thefaceshadalmostnoshapeatallbecauseofthelongwhitehairsthatcoveredthem.Therewerenonoses,nomouths,noears,nochins–onlytheeyeswerevisibleineachface,twosmallblackeyesglintingmalevolentlythroughthehairs.
Thencamethemostfrighteningthingofall.OneCloud-Man,ahugehairycreaturewhomusthavebeenfourteenfeettallatleast,suddenlystoodupandmadeatremendousleapoffthesideofthe
cloud,tryingtogettooneofthesilkstringsabovethepeach.Jamesandhisfriendssawhimgoflyingthroughtheairabovethem,hisarmsoutstretchedinfrontofhim,reachingfortheneareststring,andtheysawhimgrabitandclingtoitwithhishandsandlegs.Andthen,veryveryslowly,handoverhand,hebegantocomedownthestring.
‘Mercy!Help!Saveus!’criedtheLadybird.
‘He’scomingdowntoeatus!’wailedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.‘Jumpoverboard!’
‘TheneattheEarthwormfirst!’shoutedtheCentipede.‘It’snogoodeatingme,I‘mfullofboneslikeakipper!’
‘Centipede!’yelledJames.‘Quickly!Bitethroughthatstring,theonehe’scomingdownon!’
TheCentipederushedovertothestemofthepeachandtookthesilkstringinhisteethandbitthroughitwithonesnapofhisjaws.Immediately,farabovethem,asingleseagullwasseentocomeawayfromtherestoftheflockandgoflyingoffwithalongstringtrailing
fromitsneck.Andclingingdesperatelytotheendofthestring,shoutingandcursingwithfury,wasthehugehairyCloud-Man.Upanduphewent,swingingacrossthemoonlitsky,andJamesHenryTrotter,watchinghimwithdelight,said,‘Mygoodness,hemustweighalmostnothingatallforoneseagulltobeabletopullhimuplikethat!Hemustbeallhairandair!’
TherestoftheCloud-Menweresoflabbergastedatseeingoneoftheircompanycarriedawayinthismannerthattheyletgotheropestheywereholdingandthenofcoursedownwenttherainbow,bothhalvesofittogether,tumblingtowardstheearthbelow.Thisfreedthepeach,whichatoncebegansailingawayfromthatterriblecloud.
Butthetravellerswerenotintheclearyet.TheinfuriatedCloud-Menjumpedupandranafterthemalongthecloud,peltingthemmercilesslywithallsortsofhardandhorribleobjects.Emptypaintbuckets,paintbrushes,stepladders,stools,saucepans,frying-pans,rotteneggs,deadrats,bottlesofhair-oil–anythingthosebrutescouldlaytheirhandsoncamerainingdownuponthepeach.OneCloud-Man,takingverycarefulaim,tippedagallonofthickpurplepaintovertheedgeofthecloudrightontotheCentipedehimself.
TheCentipedescreamedwithanger.‘Mylegs!’hecried.‘Theyareallstickingtogether!Ican’twalk!Andmyeyelidswon’topen!Ican’tsee!Andmyboots!Mybootsareruined!’
ButforthemomenteveryonewasfartoobusydodgingthethingsthattheCloud-MenwerethrowingtopayanyattentiontotheCentipede.
‘Thepaintisdrying!’hemoaned.‘It’sgoinghard!Ican’tmovemylegs!Ican’tmoveanything!’
‘Youcanstillmoveyourmouth,’theEarthwormsaid.‘Andthatisagreatpity.’
‘James!’bawledtheCentipede.‘Pleasehelpme!Washoffthispaint!Scrapeitoff!Anything!’
Twenty-nine
Itseemedlikealongtimebeforetheseagullswereabletopullthepeachawayfromthathorriblerainbow-cloud.Buttheymanageditatlast,andtheneverybodygatheredaroundthewretchedCentipedeandbeganarguingaboutthebestwaytogetthepaintoffhisbody.
Hereallydidlookasight.Hewaspurpleallover,andnowthatthepaintwasbeginningtodryandharden,hewasforcedtositverystiffandupright,asthoughhewereencasedincement.Andallforty-twoofhislegswerestickingoutstraightinfrontofhim,likerods.Hetriedtosaysomething,buthislipswouldn’tmove.Allhecoulddonowwastomakegurglingnoisesinhisthroat.
TheOld-Green-Grasshopperreachedoutandtouchedhimcarefullyonthestomach.‘Buthowcoulditpossiblyhavedriedsoquickly?’heasked.
‘It’srainbow-paint,’Jamesanswered.‘Rainbow-paintdriesveryquickandveryhard.’
‘Idetestpaint,’MissSpiderannounced.‘Itfrightensme.Itreminds
meofAuntSpiker–thelateAuntSpiker,Imean–becausethelasttimeshepaintedherkitchenceilingmypoordarlinggrandmothersteppedintoitbymistakewhenitwasstillwet,andthereshestuck.Andallthroughthenightwecouldhearhercallingtous,saying“Help!help!help!”anditwasheartbreakingtolistentoher.Butwhatcouldwedo?Notathinguntilthenextdaywhenthepainthaddried,andthenofcourseweallrushedovertoherandcalmedherdownandgavehersomefood.Believeitornot,shelivedforsixmonthslikethat,upsidedownontheceilingwithherlegsstuckpermanentlyinthepaint.Shereallydid.Wefedhereveryday.Webroughtherfreshfliesstraightfromtheweb.Butthenonthetwenty-sixthofAprillast,AuntSponge–thelateAuntSponge,Imean–happenedtoglanceupattheceiling,andshespottedher.“Aspider!”shecried.“Adisgustingspider!Quick!Fetchmethemopwiththelonghandle!”Andthen–Oh,itwassoawfulIcan’tbeartothinkofit…’MissSpiderwipedawayatearandlookedsadlyattheCentipede.‘Youpoorthing,’shemurmured.‘Idofeelsorryforyou.’
‘It’llnevercomeoff,’theEarthwormsaidbrightly.‘OurCentipedewillnevermoveagain.Hewillturnintoastatueandweshallbeabletoputhiminthemiddleofthelawnwithabird-bathonthetopofhishead.’
‘Wecouldtrypeelinghimlikeabanana,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersuggested.
‘Orrubbinghimwithsandpaper,’theLadybirdsaid.
‘Nowifhestuckouthistongue,’theEarthwormsaid,smilingalittleforperhapsthefirsttimeinhislife,‘ifhestuckitoutreallyfar,thenwecouldallcatchholdofitandstartpulling.Andifwepulledhardenough,wecouldturnhiminsideoutandhewouldhaveanew
skin!’
Therewasapausewhiletheothersconsideredthisinterestingproposal.
‘Ithink,’Jamessaidslowly,‘Ithinkthatthebestthingtodo…’Thenhestopped.‘Whatwasthat?’heaskedquickly.‘Iheardavoice!Iheardsomeoneshouting!’
Thirty
Theyallraisedtheirheads,listening.
‘Ssshh!Thereitisagain!’
Butthevoicewastoofarawayforthemtohearwhatitwassaying.
‘It’saCloud-Man!’MissSpidercried.‘Ijustknowit’saCloud-Man!They’reafterusagain!’
‘Itcamefromabove!’theEarthwormsaid,andautomaticallyeverybodylookedupward,everybodyexcepttheCentipede,whocouldn’tmove.
‘Ouch!’theysaid.‘Help!Mercy!We’regoingtocatchitthistime!’Forwhattheynowsaw,swirlingandtwistingdirectlyovertheirheads,wasanimmenseblackcloud,aterrible,dangerous,thundery-lookingthingthatbegantorumbleandroarevenastheywerestaringatit.Andthen,fromhighuponthetopofthecloud,thefarawayvoicecamedowntothemonceagain,thistimeveryloudandclear.
‘Onwiththefaucets!’itshouted.‘Onwiththefaucets!Onwiththefaucets!’
Threesecondslater,thewholeunderneathofthecloudseemedtosplitandburstopenlikeapaperbag,andthen–outcamethewater!Theysawitcoming.Itwasquiteeasytoseebecauseitwasn’tjustraindrops.Itwasn’traindropsatall.Itwasagreatsolidmassofwaterthatmighthavebeenalakeorawholeoceandroppingoutoftheskyontopofthem,anddownitcame,downanddownanddown,crashingfirstontotheseagullsandthenontothepeachitself,whilethepoortravellersshriekedwithfearandgropedaroundfrantically
forsomethingtocatchholdof–thepeachstem,thesilkstrings,anythingtheycouldfind–andallthetimethewatercamepouringandroaringdownuponthem,bouncingandsmashingandsloshingandslashingandswashingandswirlingandsurgingandwhirlingandgurglingandgushingandrushingandrushing,anditwaslikebeingpinneddownunderneaththebiggestwaterfallintheworldandnotbeingabletogetout.Theycouldn’tspeak.Theycouldn’tsee.Theycouldn’tbreathe.AndJamesHenryTrotter,holdingonmadlytooneofthesilkstringsabovethepeachstem,toldhimselfthatthismustsurelybetheendofeverythingatlast.Butthen,justassuddenlyasithadstarted,thedelugestopped.Theywereoutofitanditwasallover.Thewonderfulseagullshadflownrightthroughitandhadcomeoutsafelyontheotherside.Onceagainthegiantpeachwassailingpeacefullythroughthemysteriousmoonlitsky.
‘Iamdrowned!’gaspedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper,spittingoutwaterbythepint.
‘It’sgonerightthroughmyskin!’theEarthwormgroaned.‘Ialwaysthoughtmyskinwaswaterproofbutitisn’tandnowI‘mfullofrain!’
‘Lookatme,lookatme!’shoutedtheCentipedeexcitedly.‘It’swashedmeclean!Thepaint’sallgone!Icanmoveagain!’
‘That’stheworstnewsI‘vehadinalongtime,’theEarthwormsaid.
TheCentipedewasdancingaroundthedeckandturningsomersaultsintheairandsingingatthetopofhisvoice:
‘Oh,hoorayforthestormandtherain!
Icanmove!Idon’tfeelanypain!
AndnowI‘mapest,
I‘mthebiggestandbest,
Themostmarvellouspestonceagain!’
‘Oh,doshutup,’theOld-Green-Grasshoppersaid.
‘Lookatme!’criedtheCentipede.
‘LookatME!Iamfreed!Iamfreed!
Notascratchnorabruisenorableed!
Tohisgravethisfinegent
Theyallthoughttheyhadsent
AndIverynearwent!
Oh,IVERYnearwent!
ButtheycentquitethewrongSentipede!’
Thirty-one
‘Howfastwearegoingallofasudden,’theLadybirdsaid.‘Iwonderwhy?’
‘Idon’tthinktheseagullslikethisplaceanybetterthanwedo,’Jamesanswered.‘Iimaginetheywanttogetoutofitassoonastheycan.Theygotabadfrightinthatstormwe‘vejustbeenthrough.’
Fasterandfasterflewtheseagulls,skimmingacrosstheskyatatremendouspace,withthepeachtrailingoutbehindthem.Cloudaftercloudwentbyoneitherside,allofthemghostlywhiteinthemoonlight,andseveralmoretimesduringthenightthetravellerscaughtglimpsesofCloud-Menmovingaroundonthetopsoftheseclouds,workingtheirsinistermagicupontheworldbelow.
Oncetheypassedasnowmachineinoperation,withtheCloud-Menturningthehandleandablizzardofsnowflakesblowingoutofthegreatfunnelabove.Theysawthehugedrumsthatwereusedformakingthunder,andtheCloud-Menbeatingthemfuriouslywithlonghammers.TheysawthefrostfactoriesandthewindproducersandtheplaceswherecyclonesandtornadoesweremanufacturedandsentspinningdowntowardstheEarth,andonce,deepinthehollowofalargebillowycloud,theyspottedsomethingthatcouldonlyhavebeenaCloud-Men’scity.Therewerecaveseverywhererunningintothecloud,andattheentrancestothecavestheCloud-Men’swiveswerecrouchingoverlittlestoveswithfrying-pansintheirhands,fryingsnowballsfortheirhusbands’suppers.AndhundredsofCloud-Men’schildrenwerefriskingaboutallovertheplaceandshriekingwithlaughterandslidingdownthebillowsofthecloudontoboggans.
Anhourlater,justbeforedawn,thetravellersheardasoftwhooshingnoiseabovetheirheadsandtheyglancedupandsawanimmensegreybatlikecreatureswoopingdowntowardsthemoutofthedark.Itcircledroundandroundthepeach,flappingitsgreatwingsslowlyinthemoonlightandstaringatthetravellers.Thenitutteredaseriesoflongdeepmelancholycriesandflewoffagainintothenight.
‘Oh,Idowishthemorningwouldcome!’MissSpidersaid,shiveringallover.
‘Itwon’tbelongnow,’Jamesanswered.‘Look,it’sgettinglighterovertherealready.’
Theyallsatinsilencewatchingthesunasitcameupslowlyovertherimofthehorizonforanewday.
Thirty-two
Andwhenfulldaylightcameatlast,theyallgottotheirfeetandstretchedtheirpoorcrampedbodies,andthentheCentipede,whoalwaysseemedtoseethingsfirst,shouted,‘Look!There’slandbelow!’
‘He’sright!’theycried,runningtotheedgeofthepeachandpeeringover.‘Hooray!Hooray!’
‘Itlookslikestreetsandhouses!’
‘Buthowenormousitallis!’
Avastcity,glisteningintheearlymorningsunshine,layspreadoutthreethousandfeetbelowthem.Atthatheight,thecarswerelikelittlebeetlescrawlingalongthestreets,andpeoplewalkingonthepavementslookednolargerthantinygrainsofsoot.
‘Butwhattremendoustallbuildings!’exclaimedtheLadybird.‘I‘veneverseenanythinglikethembeforeinEngland.Whichtowndoyouthinkitis?’
‘Thiscouldn’tpossiblybeEngland,’saidtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘Thenwhereisit?’askedMissSpider.
‘Youknowwhatthosebuildingsare?’shoutedJames,jumpingupanddownwithexcitement.‘Thoseareskyscrapers!SothismustbeAmerica!Andthat,myfriends,meansthatwehavecrossedtheAtlanticOceanovernight!’
‘Youdon’tmeanit!’theycried.
‘It’snotpossible!’
‘It’sincredible!It’sunbelievable!’
‘Oh,I‘vealwaysdreamedofgoingtoAmerica!’criedtheCentipede.‘Ihadafriendoncewho–’
‘Bequiet!’saidtheEarthworm.‘Whocaresaboutyourfriend?Thethingwe‘vegottothinkaboutnowishowoneartharewegoingtogetdowntoearth?’
‘AskJames,’saidtheLadybird.
‘Idon’tthinkthatshouldbesoverydifficult,’Jamestoldthem.‘Allwe’llhavetodoistocutlooseafewseagulls.Nottoomany,mindyou,butjustenoughsothattheotherscan’tquitekeepusupintheair.Thendownweshallgo,slowlyandgently,untilwereachtheground.Centipedewillbitethroughthestringsforusoneatatime.’
Thirty-three
Farbelowthem,intheCityofNewYork,somethinglikepandemoniumwasbreakingout.AgreatroundballasbigasahousehadbeensightedhoveringhighupintheskyovertheverycentreofManhattan,andthecryhadgoneupthatitwasanenormousbombsentoverbyanothercountrytoblowthewholecitytosmithereens.Air-raidsirensbeganwailingineverysection.Allradioandtelevisionprogrammeswereinterruptedwithannouncementsthatthepopulationmustgodownintotheircellarsimmediately.Onemillionpeoplewalkinginthestreetsontheirwaytoworklookedupintotheskyandsawthemonsterhoveringabovethem,andstartedrunningforthenearestsubwayentrancetotakecover.Generalsgrabbedholdoftelephonesandshoutedorderstoeveryonetheycouldthinkof.TheMayorofNewYorkcalledupthePresidentoftheUnitedStatesdowninWashington,D.C.,toaskhimforhelp,andthePresident,whoatthatmomentwashavingbreakfastinhispyjamas,quicklypushedawayhishalf-finishedplateofSugarCrispsandstartedpressingbuttonsrightandlefttosummonhisAdmiralsandhisGenerals.AndallthewayacrossthevaststretchofAmerica,inallthefiftyStatesfromAlaskatoFlorida,fromPennsylvaniatoHawaii,thealarmwassoundedandthewordwentoutthatthebiggestbombinthehistoryoftheworldwashoveringoverNewYorkCity,andthatatanymomentitmightgooff.
Thirty-four
‘Comeon,Centipede,bitethroughthefirststring,’Jamesordered.
TheCentipedetookoneofthesilkstringsbetweenhisteethandbitthroughit.Andonceagain(butnotwithanangryCloud-Mandanglingfromtheendofthestringthistime)asingleseagullcameawayfromtherestoftheflockandwentflyingoffonitsown.
‘Biteanother,’Jamesordered.
TheCentipedebitthroughanotherstring.
‘Whyaren’twesinking?’
‘Wearesinking!’
‘No,we’renot!’
‘Don’tforgetthepeachisalotlighternowthanwhenwestartedout,’Jamestoldthem.‘Itlostanawfullotofjuicewhenallthosehailstoneshititinthenight.Cutawaytwomoreseagulls,Centipede!’
‘Ah,that’sbetter!’
‘Herewego!’
‘Nowwereallyaresinking!’
‘Yes,thisisperfect!Don’tbiteanymore,Centipede,orwe’llsinktoofast!Gentlydoesit!’
Slowlythegreatpeachbeganlosingheight,andthebuildingsandstreetsdownbelowbegancomingcloserandcloser.
‘Doyouthinkwe’llallgetourpicturesinthepaperswhenwegetdown?’theLadybirdasked.
‘Mygoodness,I‘veforgottentopolishmyboots!’theCentipedesaid.‘Everyonemusthelpmetopolishmybootsbeforewearrive.’
‘Oh,forheaven’ssake!’saidtheEarthworm.‘Can’tyoueverstopthinkingabout–’
Butheneverfinishedhissentence.Forsuddenly…WHOOOSH!…andtheylookedupandsawahugefour-enginedplanecomeshootingoutofanear-bycloudandgowhizzingpastthemnotmorethantwentyfeetovertheirheads.ThiswasactuallytheregularearlymorningpassengerplanecomingintoNewYorkfromChicago,andasitwentby,itslicedrightthrougheverysingleoneofthesilkenstrings,andimmediatelytheseagullsbrokeaway,andtheenormouspeach,havingnothingtoholditupintheairanylonger,wenttumblingdowntowardstheearthlikealumpoflead.
‘Help!’criedtheCentipede.
‘Saveus!’criedMissSpider.
‘Wearelost!’criedtheLadybird.
‘Thisistheend!’criedtheOld-Green-Grasshopper.
‘James!’criedtheEarthworm.‘Dosomething,James!Quickly,dosomething!’
‘Ican‘t!’criedJames.‘I‘msorry!Good-bye!Shutyoureyeseverybody!Itwon’tbelongnow!’
Thirty-five
Roundandroundandupsidedownwentthepeachasitplummetedtowardstheearth,andtheywereallclingingdesperatelytothestemtosavethemselvesfrombeingflungintospace.
Fasterandfasteritfell.Downanddownanddown,racingcloserandclosertothehousesandstreetsbelow,whereitwouldsurelysmashintoamillionpieceswhenithit.AndallthewayalongFifthAvenueandMadisonAvenue,andalongalltheotherstreetsintheCity,peoplewhohadnotyetreachedtheundergroundshelterslookedupandsawitcoming,andtheystoppedrunningandstoodtherestaringinasortofstuporatwhattheythoughtwasthebiggestbombinalltheworldfallingoutoftheskyontotheirheads.Afewwomenscreamed.Otherskneltdownonthesidewalksandbeganprayingaloud.Strongmenturnedtooneanotherandsaidthingslike,‘Iguessthisisit,Joe,’and‘Good-bye,everybody,good-bye.’AndforthenextthirtysecondsthewholeCityhelditsbreath,waitingfortheendtocome.
Thirty-six
‘Good-bye,Ladybird!’gaspedJames,clingingtothestemofthefallingpeach.‘Good-bye,Centipede.Good-bye,everybody!’Therewereonlyafewsecondstogonowanditlookedasthoughtheyweregoingtofallrightinamongallthetallestbuildings.Jamescouldseetheskyscrapersrushinguptomeetthematthemostawfulspeed,andmostofthemhadsquareflattops,buttheverytallestofthemallhadatopthattaperedoffintoalongsharppoint–likeanenormoussilverneedlestickingupintothesky.
Anditwaspreciselyontothetopofthisneedlethatthepeachfell!
Therewasasquelch.Theneedlewentindeep.Andsuddenly–therewasthegiantpeach,caughtandspikedupontheverypinnacleoftheEmpireStateBuilding.
Thirty-seven
Itwasreallyanamazingsight,andintwoorthreeminutes,assoonasthepeoplebelowrealizedthatthisnowcouldn’tpossiblybeabomb,theycamepouringoutofthesheltersandthesubwaystogapeatthemarvel.Thestreetsforhalfamilearoundthebuildingwerejammedwithmenandwomen,andwhenthewordspreadthattherewereactuallylivingthingsmovingaboutonthetopofthegreatroundball,theneveryonewentwildwithexcitement.
‘It’saflyingsaucer!’theyshouted.
‘TheyarefromOuterSpace!’
‘TheyaremenfromMars!’
‘OrmaybetheycamefromtheMoon!’
Andamanwhohadapairofbinocularstohiseyessaid,‘Theylookpritt-typeculiartome,I’lltellyouthat.’
PolicecarsandfireenginescamescreaminginfromalloverthecityandpulledupoutsidetheEmpireStateBuilding.Twohundredfiremenandsixhundredpolicemenswarmedintothebuildingandwentupintheelevatorsashighastheycouldgo.Thentheypouredoutontotheobservationroof–whichistheplacewheretouristsstand–justatthebottomofthebigspike.
Allthepolicemenwereholdingtheirgunsattheready,withtheirfingersonthetriggers,andthefiremenwereclutchingtheirhatchets.Butfromwheretheystood,almostdirectlyunderneaththepeach,theycouldn’tactuallyseethetravellersupontop.
‘Ahoythere!’shoutedtheChiefofPolice.‘Comeoutandshowyourselves!’
Suddenly,thegreatbrownheadoftheCentipedeappearedoverthesideofthepeach.Hisblackeyes,aslargeandroundastwomarbles,glareddownatthepolicemenandthefiremenbelow.Thenhismonstrousuglyfacebrokeintoawidegrin.
Thepolicemenandthefiremenallstartedshoutingatonce.‘Lookout!’theycried.‘It’saDragon!’
‘It’snotaDragon!It’saWampus!’
‘It’saGorgon!’
‘It’saSea-serpent!’
‘It’saProck!’
‘It’saManticore!’
Threefiremenandfivepolicemenfaintedandhadtobecarriedaway.
‘It’saSnozzwanger!’criedtheChiefofPolice.
‘It’saWhangdoodle!’yelledtheHeadoftheFireDepartment.
TheCentipedekeptongrinning.Heseemedtobeenjoyingenormouslythecommotionthathewascausing.
‘Nowseehere!’shoutedtheChiefofPolice,cuppinghishandstohismouth.‘Youlistentome!Iwantyoutotellmeexactlywhereyou‘vecomefrom!’
‘We‘vecomefromthousandsofmilesaway!’theCentipedeshoutedback,grinningmorebroadlythaneverandshowinghisbrownteeth.
‘Thereyouare!’calledtheChiefofPolice.‘Itoldyoutheycame
fromMars!’
‘Iguessyou’reright!’saidtheHeadoftheFireDepartment.
Atthispoint,theOld-Green-Grasshopperpokedhishugegreenheadoverthesideofthepeach,alongsidetheCentipede’s.Sixmorebigstrongmenfaintedwhentheysawhim.
‘Thatone’sanOinck!’screamedtheHeadoftheFireDepartment.‘Ijustknowit’sanOinck!’
‘OraCockatrice!’yelledtheChiefofPolice.‘Standback,men!Itmayjumpdownonusanymoment!’
‘Whatoneartharetheytalkingabout?’theOld-Green-GrasshoppersaidtotheCentipede.
‘Searchme,’theCentipedeanswered.‘Buttheyseemtobeinanawfulstewaboutsomething.’
ThenMissSpider’slargeblackmurderous-lookinghead,whichtoastrangerwasprobablythemostterrifyingofall,appearednexttotheGrasshopper‘s.
‘Snakesandladders!’yelledtheHeadoftheFireDepartment.‘Wearefinishednow!It’sagiantScorpula!’
‘It’sworsethanthat!’criedtheChiefofPolice.‘It’savermiciousKnid!Oh,justlookatitsvermiciousgruesomeface!’
‘Isthatthekindthateatsfully-grownmenforbreakfast?’theHeadoftheFireDepartmentasked,goingwhiteasasheet.
‘I‘mafraiditis,’theChiefofPoliceanswered.
‘Oh,pleasewhydoesn’tsomeonehelpustogetdownfromhere?’MissSpidercalledout.‘It’smakingmegiddy.’
‘Thiscouldbeatrick!’saidtheHeadoftheFireDepartment.‘Don’tanyonemakeamoveuntilIsay!’
‘They‘veprobablygotspaceguns!’mutteredtheChiefofPolice.
‘Butwe‘vegottodosomething!’theHeadoftheFireDepartmentannouncedgrimly.‘Aboutfivemillionpeoplearestandingdownthereonthestreetswatchingus.’
‘Thenwhydon’tyouputupaladder?’theChiefofPoliceaskedhim.‘I’llstandatthebottomandholditsteadyforyouwhileyougoupandseewhat’shappening.’
‘Thanksverymuch!’snappedtheHeadoftheFireDepartment.
Soontherewerenolessthansevenlargefantasticfacespeeringdownoverthesideofthepeach–theCentipede‘s,theOld-Green-Grasshopper‘s,MissSpider‘s,theEarthworm‘s,theLadybird‘s,theSilkworm‘s,andtheGlow-worm‘s.Andasortofpanicwasbeginningtobreakoutamongthefiremenandthepolicemenontherooftop.
Then,allatonce,thepanicstoppedandagreatgaspofastonishmentwentupallround.Fornow,asmallboywasseentobestandinguptherebesidetheothercreatures.Hishairwasblowinginthewind,andhewaslaughingandwavingandcallingout,‘Hello,everybody!Hello!’
Forafewmoments,themenbelowjuststoodandstaredandgaped.Theysimplycouldn’tbelievetheireyes.
‘Blessmysoul!’criedtheHeadoftheFireDepartment,goingredintheface.‘Itreallyisalittleboy,isn’tit?’
‘Don’tbefrightenedofus,please!’Jamescalledout.‘Wearesogladtobehere!’
‘Whataboutthoseothersbesideyou?’shoutedtheChiefofPolice.‘Areanyofthemdangerous?’
‘Ofcoursethey’renotdangerous!’Jamesanswered.‘They’rethenicestcreaturesintheworld!AllowmetointroducethemtoyouonebyoneandthenI‘msureyouwillbelieveme.’
‘Myfriends,thisistheCentipede,andletmemakeitknown
Heissosweetandgentlethat(althoughhe’sovergrown)
TheQueenofSpain,againandagain,hassummonedhimbyphone
Tobaby-sitandsingandknitandbeachaperone
Whennurseisoffandalltheroyalchildrenarealone.’
(‘Smallwonder,’saidaFireman,‘they’renolongeronthethrone.’)
‘TheEarthworm,ontheotherhand,’
SaidJames,beginningtoexpand,
‘Isgreatfordigginguptheland
Andmakingoldsoilsnewer.
Moreover,youshouldunderstand
Hewouldbeabsolutelygrand
Fordiggingsubwaytunnelsand
Formakingyouasewer.’
(TheEarthwormblushedandbeamedwithpride.
MissSpiderclappedandcheeredandcried,
‘Couldanywordsbetruer?’)
‘AndtheGrasshopper,ladiesandgents,isaboon
Inmillionsandmillionsofways.
Youhaveonlytoaskhimtogiveyouatune
Andheplaysandheplaysandheplays.
Asatoyforyourchildrenhe’sperfectlysweet;
There’snothingsogoodintheshops–
You‘veonlytoticklethesolesofhisfeet
Andhehopsandhehopsandhehops.’
(‘Hecan’tbeveryfierce!’exclaimed
TheHeadofalltheCops.)
‘Andnowwithoutexcuse
I’dliketointroduce
ThischarmingGlow-worm,loverofsimplicity.
Sheiseasytoinstall
Onjourceilingoryourwall,
Andalthoughthissmacksabitofeccentricity,
It’sreallyratherclever
Forthereafteryouwillnever
YouwillNEVERNEVERNEVER
Havetheslightestneedforusingelectricity.’
(Atwhich,nolessthanfifty-two
Policemencried,‘Ifthisistrue
Thatcreature’llgetsomefabulouspublicity!’)
‘AndherewehaveMissSpider
Withamileofthreadinsideher
Whohaspersonallyrequestedmetosay
Thatshe‘sNEVERmetMissMuffet
Onhercharminglittletuffet–
Ifshehadshe‘dNOThavefrightenedheraway.
Shouldherlookssometimesalarmyou
ThenIdon’tthinkitwouldharmyou
Torepeatatleastahundredtimesaday:
“ImustNEVERkillaspider
Imustonlyhelpandguideher
Andinviteherinthenurserytoplay.”’
(ThePoliceallnoddedslightly,
AndtheFiremensmiledpolitely,
Andaboutadozenpeoplecried,‘Hooray!’)
‘Andhere’smydarlingLadybird,sobeautjul,sokind,
Mygreatestcomfortsincethistripbegan.
Shehasfourhundredchildrenandshe’sleftthemallbehind,
Butthey’recomingonthenextpeachofthecan.’
(TheCopscried,‘She’sentrancing!’
AlltheFiremenstarteddancing,
Andthecrowdsallstartedcheeringtoaman!)
‘Andnow,theSilkworm,’Jameswenton,
‘Whosesilkwillbearcomparison
Withallthegreatestsilksthereare
InRomeandPhiladelphia.
Ifyouwouldsearchthewholeworldthrough
FromParaguaytoTimbuctoo
Idon’tthinkyouwouldfindonebit
Ofsilkthatcouldcomparewithit.
EventheshopsinSingapore
Don’thavethestuff.Andwhatismore,
ThisSilkwormhad,I’llhaveyouknow,
Thehonour,notsolongago,
Tospinandweaveandsewandpress
TheQueenofEngland’sweddingdress.
Andshe’salreadymadeandsent
AwaistcoatforyourPresident.’
(‘Well,goodforher!’theCopscriedout,
Andallatonceamightyshout
WentuparoundtheEmpireState,
Let’sgetthemdownatonce!WhyWAIT?’)
Thirty-eight
Fiveminuteslater,theywereallsafelydown,andJameswasexcitedlytellinghisstorytoagroupofflabbergastedofficials.
Andsuddenly–everyonewhohadcomeoveronthepeachwasahero!TheywereallescortedtothestepsofCityHall,wheretheMayorofNewYorkmadeaspeechofwelcome.Andwhilehewasdoingthis,onehundredsteeplejacks,armedwithropesandladdersandpulleys,swarmeduptothetopoftheEmpireStateBuildingandliftedthegiantpeachoffthespikeandloweredittotheground.
ThentheMayorshouted,‘Wemustnowhaveaticker-tapeparadeforourwonderfulvisitors!’
Andsoaprocessionwasformed,andintheleadingcar(whichwasanenormousopenlimousine)satJamesandallhisfriends.
Nextcamethegiantpeachitself.Menwithcranesandhookshadquicklyhoisteditontoaverylargetruckandthereitnowsat,lookingjustashugeandproudandbraveasever.Therewas,ofcourse,abitofaholeinthebottomofitwherethespikeoftheEmpireStateBuildinghadgonein,butwhocaredaboutthat–orindeedaboutthepeachjuicethatwasdrippingoutofitontothestreet?
Behindthepeach,skiddingaboutallovertheplaceinthepeachjuice,cametheMayor’slimousine,andbehindtheMayor’slimousinecameabouttwentyotherlimousinescarryingalltheimportantpeopleoftheCity.
Andthecrowdswentwildwithexcitement.Theylinedthestreets
andtheyleanedoutofthewindowsoftheskyscrapers,cheeringandyellingandscreamingandclappingandthrowingoutbitsofwhitepaperandticker-tape,andJamesandhisfriendsstoodupintheircarandwavedbackatthemastheywentby.
Thenarathercuriousthinghappened.TheprocessionwasmovingslowlyalongFifthAvenuewhensuddenlyalittlegirlinareddressranoutfromthecrowdandshouted,‘Oh,James,James!CouldIpleasehavejustatinytasteofyourmarvellouspeach?’
‘Helpyourself!’Jamesshoutedback.‘Eatallyouwant!Itwon’tkeepforever,anyway!’
Nosoonerhadhesaidthisthanaboutfiftyotherchildrenexplodedoutofthecrowdandcamerunningontothestreet.
‘Canwehavesome,too?’theycried.
‘Ofcourseyoucan!’Jamesanswered.‘Everyonecanhavesome!’
Thechildrenjumpedupontothetruckandswarmedlikeantsalloverthegiantpeach,eatingandeatingtotheirhearts’content.Andasthenewsofwhatwashappeningspreadquicklyfromstreettostreet,moreandmoreboysandgirlscamerunningfromalldirectionstojointhefeast.Soon,therewasatrailofchildrenamilelongchasingafterthepeachasitproceededslowlyupFifthAvenue.Really,itwasafantasticsight.TosomepeopleitlookedasthoughthePiedPiperofHamelinhadsuddenlydescendeduponNewYork.AndtoJames,whohadneverdreamedthattherecouldbesomanychildrenasthisintheworld,itwasthemostmarvellousthingthathadeverhappened.
Bythetimetheprocessionwasover,thewholegiganticfruithadbeencompletelyeatenup,andonlythebigbrownstoneinthemiddle,lickedcleanandshinybytenthousandeagerlittletongues,
wasleftstandingonthetruck.
Thirty-nine
Andthusthejourneyended.Butthetravellerslivedon.Everyoneofthembecamerichandsuccessfulinthenewcountry.
TheCentipedewasmadeVice-President-in-Charge-of-Salesofahigh-classfirmofbootandshoemanufacturers.
TheEarthworm,withhislovelypinkskin,wasemployedbyacompanythatmadewomen’sfacecreamstospeakcommercialsontelevision.
TheSilkwormandMissSpider,aftertheyhadbothbeentaughttomakenylonthreadinsteadofsilk,setupafactorytogetherandmaderopesfortightropewalkers.
TheGlow-wormbecamethelightinsidethetorchontheStatueofLiberty,andthussavedagratefulCityfromhavingtopayahugeelectricitybilleveryyear.
TheOld-Green-GrasshopperbecameamemberoftheNewYorkSymphonyOrchestra,wherehisplayingwasgreatlyadmired.
TheLadybird,whohadbeenhauntedallherlifebythefearthatherhousewasonfireandherchildrenallgone,marriedtheHeadoftheFireDepartmentandlivedhappilyeverafter.
Andasfortheenormouspeachstone–itwassetuppermanentlyinaplaceofhonourinCentralParkandbecameafamousmonument.Butitwasnotonlyafamousmonument.Itwasalsoafamoushouse.Andinsidethefamoushousetherelivedafamousperson–
JAMESHENRYTROTTER
himself.
Andallyouhadtodoanydayoftheweekwastogoandknockuponthedoor,andthedoorwouldalwaysbeopenedtoyou,andyouwouldalwaysbeaskedtocomeinsideandseethefamousroomwhereJameshadfirstmethisfriends.Andsometimes,ifyouwereverylucky,youwouldfindtheOld-Green-Grasshopperinthereaswell,restingpeacefullyinachairbeforethefire,orperhapsitwouldbetheLadybirdwhohaddroppedinforacupofteaandagossip,ortheCentipedetoshowoffanewbatchofparticularlyelegantbootsthathehadjustacquired.
Everydayoftheweek,hundredsandhundredsofchildrenfromfarandnearcamepouringintotheCitytoseethemarvellouspeachstoneinthePark.AndJamesHenryTrotter,whoonce,ifyouremember,hadbeenthesaddestandloneliestlittleboythatyoucouldfind,nowhadallthefriendsandplaymatesintheworld.Andbecausesomanyofthemwerealwaysbegginghhntotellandtellagainthestoryofhisadventuresonthepeach,hethoughtitwouldbeniceifonedayhesatdownandwroteitasabook.
Sohedid.
Andthatiswhatyouhavejustfinishedreading