in the College Admissions Process

With Parents

Moderator: Jeff Chiapello, Asst. Director of Admission University of Saint Francis

Presenters:Kris Donahue, Parent Naperville Central High School

Jean Childers, College & Career Assistant Naperville Central High School

Martha Stolze, Director of Admission North Central College

Parents – Goals

• Want the best for their child• Want kids to have opportunities they didn’t• Invest in their only child• Guide child through process with minimal stress• Long term success of the student

Parent’s Stress

• Does my student want to go to college?• Family & societal expectations• Parent’s report card• Will my student get a job?• Letting go of an unfinished child• Financial worries – can we afford college/loans• Loss of control & separation from child

Students - Goals

• Make money, be happy• Preparing self to look good for college• I just want to draw/play ball• Meet parent’s and societies' expectations• Career goal influenced by experiences

Students - Stress

• Increased homework; AP classes• What if no one likes me – on my application• Not getting into their first choice college• Look to quality of college for self-worth• Indecision of major/career• Fear of the future and next life transition• Strained parent relationships• Upcoming departure from home

Parents Seek Information

• Knowledge is power and cure for fear• College-educated may have tools to help student• Others can’t guide students who need most

help. • Internet• Family, friends, other parents• High School Counselor• College Admissions Counselor

What Parents Want From High School Counselors

NCHS Parent Focus Groups 2011

Timelines

College process timeline• Present timeline every year• Delineate tasks for students & parents

Counselor advising timeline• Freshmen – attention grabbers – “Jr. Joiner”• Sophomore – college & career exploration • Junior visits – college selection; course review• Early senior year – college application advising

Information Programs

• Course selection – college academic preparation• Extracurricular involvement – college

importance• Career planning• College admissions testing• College selection• College application process• Financial aid workshop

Workshops

• Generic information sessions• Workshops for special groups– Highly selective– NCAA– Career training– Illinois state college options– Engineering/business

• Parent forums – share experiences

Specialized Information

• Helpful hints – if you go to this college then…• College specific requirements for admission• Highly selective criteria – beyond ACT & GPA• Professional program information• Paint picture of college criteria• Parent Newsletter–information & calendar of events

Counselor Knowledge

• Broad knowledge of many colleges• Depth of knowledge of Top 50 colleges• Aware of special requirements for selectives.• Know where to find information requested

Things Counselors

Should Know

College Counseling

• Counselors suggest colleges• Apply their unbiased non-parent view • Recommendations – address glitch issues• Advocate for student in application & contacts• Don’t discourage student from reach schools• Parent comments for recommendation letters

Career Counseling

• Career counseling for all grades• Learning style assessment – college match• Use interest & personality data in career

counseling• Promote career training options• Pathways for careers – classes/majors

What Parents Want From College Admissions Counselors

NCHS Parent Focus Groups 2011

College Visits

• List of “smart questions”• Tour guides make or break visit• Enthusiastic tour guide• Informed tour guide• Major specific sub-tours

Information Parents want

• Return rate/grad rate/4 year grad rate• National survey - student engagement results• What is parent’s notification policy? • What is campus safety plan?• Timeline – notification dates/next steps• Paint a picture of life on campus

Website

• Campus service directory• Admissions & Financial Aid Contact phone #• Calendar of important dates & events• FAQ• Parent Association• Newsletter• Travel/ Hotel information

Parents want to know• Impact of HS course selection on acceptance• Which colleges superscore or unweight grades• Admissions data by major

Financial Aid

• Publish total cost on website• Publish minimum ACT/GPA for merit money• Transparency in scholarship requirements• Emancipation & residency requirements• Financial aid seminars

Government - Goal

US Department of EducationPromote partnership to increase parent involvement• Goals 2000 Educate America Act• Partnership for Family Involvement in Education• NCLB mandates• Title 1 School funding

School District - Goals• Form partnership with parents• Open communication with parents• Inform parents• Support parent involvement• Included parents in college process

Counselors - Goals

• Increase college readiness of students• Good match college choices• Continued support of family • Healthy graduate who can leave home• Foster independence of graduates

Parent Involvement• College educated parents are often very

involved in their student’s college selection.• First generation & low income students have

the most to gain/lose and may have little parent involvement.

Parents – Helicopter Defined

• Parent’s obsessed with kid’s success• Success requires parental involvement• Hover over students ready

to intervene on child’s behalf• Rescue student or attack their enemy• Living their lives through students• Parents micromanage students • Unwilling to let children make

independent decisions

Causes of Helicopter Parenting

• Control – lack of faith in system; parent knows system• Time management – student’s time, parent’s patience• Doubt – student’s diligence & capability• Relive youth – athletics & academic potential• Protective – fewer children, societal danger• Anxiety – fear of failure, past experience with child• High Expectations – from parents & society; prestige• Access – 24/7 instant communication• Competition – highly selectives

Helicopter Parents Enable

Drop off:•lunches•Gym clothes•Homework•Sports equipment

Wake-up calls

HomeworkRegister for ACT testsWrite college essaysFill out college applications

Helicopter Parents Monitor & Problem-Solve for Students

computer espionage Facebook creeping cell phone usage

gradesteachers & counselors

Friends Coach from sidelines

Helicopter Parents Make Decisions

Parents control college interview Parents choose student’s major

Parents choose student’s college

Unintended Consequence of Hovering

• College academics suffer without parent’s help• Dependency; student doesn’t develop independence• Irresponsibility; trouble taking on responsibility• Incompetence; tell child they can’t make it• Family conflict & lack of trust• Poor self esteem; more self conscious & vulnerable• Low motivation; anxious adults who take few risks• Can’t make decisions or deal with problems• Failure to launch; immaturity

Counseling Helicopter Parents

• Assess parent’s needs• Address parent’s fears• Sensitive to cultural differences• Encourage parents to mentor with other parents • Help parents know when they are crossing the line• Facilitate appropriate parent involvement• Provide welcoming environment for parents

High School Counselors Role in the process

•Counselors serve all students & plan all programming unassisted•College Counselor leads College & Career Center & program planning•Several Post High School Counselors serve class & plan programs•College & Career Assistant with all Counselors sharing program plans

College & Career Center Partners with Parents•Thursday night services for family advising•Answer student’s & parent’s questions and address their concerns•Advise families throughout the college admissions process•Focus groups for parent input to improve Student Services

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Parents Assist College & Career Center•Prepare handouts•Research information•Copy info for students•Collect info from college visits

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Benefits of Parents Volunteering in the College & Career Center•gather information •oversight of college visits•promote center and spread information into community

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e-CounselingWEBSITE• Post info on website• Podcasts or post recorded programs on website

NAVIANCE• Naviance for all grades • E-mail contacts/info• Electronic survey of students

SOCIAL NETWORKING • College & Career Center Facebook page • No counselor to student social networking

What: College Information NightWho: Junior Parents When: Tuesday, March 22, 2011 7PMWhere: NCHS Auditorium

Counselor’s Career Advice to Parents

• Listen to understand your student’s needs• Help your student assess their abilities,

interests, goals, and personality• Be realistic about student’s interests & skills• Let your students pursue own passions – not

yours

Counselor’s College Search Advice to Parents

• Talk about college planning early - 9th grade• Engage help of friends, coaches, relatives• Research colleges best suited for interests• Help develop criteria for selection• Let student take the lead in choosing college• Work college trips into family vacations

Counselor’s Financial Aid Advice to Parents

• Parents greatest involvement – college cost • Communicate financial limitations early• Explain the debt students may incur• Don’t initially rule out a college only on cost• Utilize net price calculator on college websites

Counselors Advice to Parents Interaction with their Students

• Listen to your student and observe struggles• Support child. Encourage without acting• Roll back over-protectiveness• Guide rather than pressure• Be patient – keep lines of communication open• Understand importance of friends in process

College View

Helicopter Horror Stories

• Defending their student• Doing the work for their student (essays, etc)• Dictating their student’s choice• Over-protecting their student• Spying on their student

Positives of Involved Parents• Increase applications, name recognition, etc. for

your school• Potential long-term financial support for your

school• Increase student retention and graduation rates• Give their student confidence and support

Fostering a Positive College/Parent Relationship

• Educate About Process• Inform With Data•Collaborate

Educate About Process• Provide tools such as “smart” questions to ask• Be as transparent as possible about

Admission, Scholarship and Financial Aid processes and timelines

• Help parents understand from early on how FERPA impacts them

• The safety of their child is key – explain emergency notifications, etc.

Inform With Data

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Inform With Data• Make Information easy to find on the web• “NSSE” National Survey of Student

Engagement results• Retention and Graduation rates• Important contact information• Dates to know (orientation, siblings weekend, etc.)• Area visitor information

Collaborate• Build relationships with high school side• Work with other campus areas such as

Student Affairs, Athletics, Parent Office• Engage parents of current students in

programming and communication

Best Practices

• Remember that this is a time of excitement, but challenge and change for most parents

• Include parents in the communication flow• Provide positive venues for parent enthusiasm

in the College Admissions ProcessWith Parents

QUESTIONS?