FabJob Guide to Become a Relationship Coach · FabJob Guide to Become a Relationship Coach ... Dr. Phil, Fox & Friends, The ... in response to our request for advice for prospective

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Help people have better relationships!

FabJob Guide to

Become a Relationship

Coach

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Kourtnee Jackson

FabJob Guide to Become a Relationship Coach

Copyright © 2017 FabJob Inc. • www.fabjob.com • 2

FABJOB® GUIDE TO BECOME A RELATIONSHIP COACH

by Kourtnee Jackson

ISBN: 978-1-897286-97-5

Copyright Notice: This FabJob® guide is copyright © 2017 by FabJob Inc. All rights reserved. FabJob has the exclusive right under the U.S. Copyright Act (Title17, U.S.C. §106) to make and distribute copies of FabJob guides and to make derivative works based on these guides. No part of any FabJob guide may be reproduced, revised, or distributed in any form or by any means (including photocopying, recording, or online) without our prior written permission. Unauthorized copying of all or part of a FabJob guide constitutes copyright infringement and may result in legal remedies including an injunction, statutory damages of up to $150,000 per infringement, and possible criminal prosecution. FabJob is represented in copyright matters by Christensen O’Connor Johnson Kindness PLLC.

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ContentsHow to Use This Guide .........................................................................3

Acknowledgements ................................................................................7

1. Introduction ............................................................................................8

1.1 The Need for Relationship Coaches ............................................9

1.2 What is a Relationship Coach? ...................................................10

2. Relationship Coaching Fundamentals ............................................14

2.1 Client Demographics ..................................................................15

2.2 Couples Coaching ........................................................................16

2.3 Divorce Coaching .........................................................................17

2.4 Coaching Groups .........................................................................18

2.4.1 Presenting a Group Coaching Session .............................19

2.4.2 Group Coaching Considerations ......................................24

2.5 Singles Coaching ..........................................................................25

2.6 Family and Adolescent Coaching .............................................26

2.7 Growing Relationship Coaching Markets ................................27

2.8 Providing Relationship Coaching Services ...............................30

2.8.1 Initial Consultation and Intake Session ...........................31

2.8.2 Relationship Assessment Tools .........................................39

2.8.3 Tools for Changing Behaviors ...........................................45

2.8.4 Other Tools and Exercises .................................................46

2.8.5 Relationship Coaching Examples .....................................58

2.9 Delivering Relationship Coaching Services ..............................60

2.9.1 Events for Couples and Singles ........................................62

3. Getting Ready .......................................................................................72

3.1 Skills Assessment .........................................................................72

3.2 Skills and Knowledge You Will Need .......................................73




3.2.1 Coaching Skills or Knowledge ..........................................73

3.2.2 Interpersonal Skills .............................................................74

3.2.3 Business Skills .....................................................................77

3.3 Hands-On Learning ....................................................................77

3.4 Learn From Other Business Owners..........................................79

3.4.1 Information Interviews ......................................................79

3.4.2 Mentoring ............................................................................82

3.4.3 Associations .........................................................................85

3.4.4 Certificate Programs ...........................................................87

3.4.5 Packaged/Branded Coaching Systems ............................88

3.4.6 Business Courses ................................................................89

3.5 Resources for Self-Study ..............................................................90

3.5.1 Books and Magazines ........................................................90

3.5.2 Websites ...............................................................................91

4. Starting Your Own Business..............................................................92

4.1 Getting Started as a Professional Relationship Coach ............94

4.1.1 Creating a Business Plan ...................................................94

4.1.2 Choosing a Business Legal Structure .............................102

4.1.3 Choosing a Business Name ............................................108

4.1.4 Choosing Your Location ..................................................110

4.2 Financial Matters ........................................................................113

4.2.1 Start-up and Operating Expenses ..................................113

4.2.2 Start-up Financing ...........................................................118

4.2.3 Taxes ...................................................................................123

4.2.4 Insurance ............................................................................124

4.3 Setting Your Fees .......................................................................127

4.3.1 Calculating an Hourly Rate .............................................128

4.3.2 Fees for Individuals ..........................................................132

4.3.3 Group Coaching Fees .......................................................135




4.3.4 Fees for Corporate Clients ...............................................139

4.3.5 Retainers ............................................................................139

4.3.6 Getting Paid .......................................................................140

4.3.7 Keeping Track of Your Finances .....................................146

4.4 Working with Support Staff ......................................................150

4.4.1 Employees versus Contractors .......................................150

4.4.2 Before You Hire .................................................................152

4.4.3 Finding Support Staff .......................................................154

4.4.4 The Interview Process ......................................................155

4.4.5 References ..........................................................................157

5. Attracting Clients ...............................................................................158

5.1 Choose Your Target Market ......................................................159

5.2 Marketing Tools ..........................................................................162

5.2.1 Printed Materials ..............................................................162

5.2.2 Your Website ......................................................................170

5.2.3 Social Media .....................................................................175

5.3 Marketing Techniques ...............................................................179

5.3.1 Advertising ........................................................................180

5.3.2 Free Media Publicity ........................................................184

5.3.3 Networking .......................................................................189

5.3.4 Your Elevator Pitch ...........................................................193

5.3.5 Promotional Events ..........................................................197

5.4 Partnerships.................................................................................201

5.5 Selling Your Services ..................................................................202

5.5.1 Responding to Inquiries ..................................................202

5.5.2 Contacting Corporate Clients .........................................205

5.5.3 Meeting with a Prospective Client .................................206

5.6 Client Contracts ..........................................................................210

6. Conclusion ..........................................................................................216




AcknowledgementsThis guide was prepared by personnel from FabJob Inc., an award-winning publishing company named “the #1 place to get published online” by Writer’s Digest. Some of the research and interviews for this guide were carried out by a graduate student in psychology with several years of experience as a writer and researcher who has written and edited books and eBooks on a variety of related topics including coaching, personality assessments, emotional intelligence, and relationships.

Our experts have been featured sharing relationship advice in many media outlets including the Los Angeles Times, New York Post, US Weekly, Access Hollywood, Cosmopolitan, Ask Men, ABC News, Dr. Phil, Fox & Friends, The Tyra Banks Show, Good Morning America, and The Today Show. Thank you to the following people (listed alphabetically), whose willingness to share information has been invaluable:

• Mitch Berk, www.selectivesearch.com

• Daryl Cioffi, www.polarisri.com

• Siggy Flicker, www.siggyflicker.com

• Greg Friedman, http://gregfriedman.com

• Thomas Gagliano, MSW, www.thomasgagliano.com

• Sarah Jones, https://introvertedalpha.com

• Dr. Dennis Kravetz, www.longlife4me.com

• Suzanna Mathews, www.thedatemaven.com

• Laura Meyer, Divorce Coach

• Dick Powell, http://ewfw.org

• David Steele, www.relationshipcoachinginstitute.com


1. IntroductionCourage means to keep working a relationship, to continue seeking solutions to difficult problems.

– Dennis Waitley

As a relationship coach, you can have a rewarding career helping people to have better relationships. This may be an ideal career for you if you can answer “yes” to the following two questions: Do you have an interest in interpersonal relationship dynamics? Do you like helping people?

“Everyone says it, but you have to mean it: you have GOT to want to HELP people,” according to Thomas Gagliano, MSW, a successful relationship coach and author, in response to our request for advice for prospective relationship coaches.

“Don’t do it because of the money or have any other motivation for a career in coaching,” he added. “As coaches we are often dealing with people right in the middle of their problems so they will need more patience, more care, more empathy. If that’s not the motivation, nothing else matters.”



While relationship coaches most commonly help their clients improve romantic or family relationships, relationship skills can be helpful in all spheres of life, including the workplace.

1.1 The Need for Relationship CoachesBy choosing to become a relationship coach, you have entered a coaching market with healthy growth potential.

There are currently hundreds of relationship coaches throughout the United States and Canada, about half of whom hold credentials as therapists or counselors. Roughly two-thirds of relationship coaches are women, as well as several husband-and-wife teams. While this branch of life coaching is still relatively new, its potential for continued growth looks promising.

The numbers behind the growing need for relationship coaching are staggering. Although exact figures are not available, the divorce rate is a partial proxy of demand for relationship coaching. In the 1960s, 20 percent of first marriages ended in divorce. Today, 40 to 50 percent of first marriages end in divorce, and the rate is even higher for second and third marriages.

A comprehensive overview of research on divorce, which makes good reading for anyone considering a career as a relationship coach, has been published by family law attorneys Wilkinson and Finkbeiner at www.wf-lawyers.com/divorce-statistics-and-facts. Among their findings:

• Every hour, 277 divorces take place in the United States

• Sixty percent of those divorces will take place before the spouses turn 40

• Many of these divorcees will become involved in other relationships and some remarriages

People may play the online dating game for months or years and enter into several short and long-term relationships. The children of a divorce will likely have more than two parental figures while growing up.


http://www.wf-lawyers.com/divorce-statistics-and-facts



As a result, most people will have many more intimate relationships than our grandparents, who were married ‘until death do us part.’’

To manage our numerous and more complex relationships, more and more of us are turning to relationship coaches to help us develop strong, healthy relationships with the people who are important to us in our lives.

Two key trends are driving the increase in demand for relationship coaching. For couples, the removal of the stigma around marriage and divorce counseling has opened the door to over 50 percent of couples seeking some form of relationship advice at least once.

The second trend is singles being proactive and seeking relationship advice early, even as early as the pre-dating stage. While couples make up the majority of people seeking relationship advice, singles are now the fastest growing segment of the market.

Divorced and widowed individuals are the least content, according to singles expert Dr. Bella DePaulo, writing in Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored and Still Live Happily Ever After. Never-married singles are also in search of improved life satisfaction. On a scale of 1 to 4, the currently-married rate 3.3, always-single 3.2, divorced 2.9, and widowed 2.9. True relationship bliss eludes even those who are ‘happily’ married. Meanwhile, 40 percent of adults today are single, but very few are blissfully single; many are looking for love.

According to this satisfaction survey, potential clients across all types of relationships could possibly benefit from your services. The demand for relationship coaching is high and growing, confirm the practicing coaches interviewed for this guide.

1.2 What is a Relationship Coach?Since Sigmund Freud began to treat patients with talk therapy on his famous couch, many people have talked about their past to psychiatrists, psychologists, counselors, and other mental health professionals. Relationship coaching, in contrast, focuses on your present state and your future goals. Relationship coaches then take concrete action to help you reach your goals.




What a Relationship Coach is Not

Counselor – Coaches are not considered counselors. Counseling is a type of talk therapy in which the client discusses his problems while the counselor provides guidance and advice, and possible exercises. Counseling is typically performed in a pre-scheduled series of six-to-ten sessions, and more if required. At a minimum, counselors hold a bachelor’s degree in psychology or social work, and many have a master’s degree.

Psychotherapist – While psychotherapists may provide coaching, coaches are not psychotherapists. Psychotherapy focuses on talking about past issues to understand and resolve problems in the present, and often occurs in a clinical setting.

Psychologist – While many psychologists are relationship coaches, relationship coaches are not psychologists and should never provide advice on mental health issues, such as clinically diagnosing depression, anxiety disorders, psychosis, and so on. Coaches should also avoid counseling someone experiencing violence in a relationship.

Relationship coaches are called on to fix many problems:

• Unresolved issues: “We keep having the same old arguments, over and over again!”

• Lack of communication: “I feel as though I am talking to a wall. He is detached and never at home.”

• Displaced anger: “Lose weight. Stop drinking beer.’ All she does is nag, nag, nag!”

• Lack of trust: “He says he is working late, but after the affair I no longer trust him!”

• Lack of confidence: “I lack the confidence to put myself out there after 20 years of marriage and two kids.”




A relationship coach has a number of tools and techniques at his or her disposal to help:

• Solve problems

• Break cycles

• Build trust

• Teach communication skills

• Address co-dependency

• Provide anger management

• Assess compatibility

• Practice nonviolent communication

• Develop assertiveness

• Teach conflict management

• Rekindle love

In This Guide

In the next chapter, we will introduce you to the tools and techniques needed to be a relationship coach. We’ll discuss major relationship coaching specializations and growing markets. Who are the people seeking relationship coaching? What is their motivation for seeking coaching? You will then be introduced to ways to provide relationship coaching services, including coaching tools and techniques you can use to help people solve relationship problems and improve relationship skills. This chapter can help you determine which particular coaching tools and techniques will work best for your own relationship coaching business.

Chapter 3 will prepare you for becoming a relationship coach, providing educational resources and tips for business, coaching, and communication. Finding associations, mentors, and certification programs to enhance your skills as a relationship coach will also be outlined.




Chapter 4 rolls out the carpet into the world of entrepreneurship, showing you how to set up a business, set fees, and manage your clients seamlessly. You will have access to sample contracts, letters, and testimonials. The business side of coaching is crucial to your success as the owner of a relationship coaching business.

Finally, chapter 5 explores ideas for marketing your relationship coaching services. In addition to working with couples, as a relationship coach you might choose to offer coaching for singles seeking a partner, family members (such as parents and children), or business people who want to have better relationships with a business partner or co-workers. This chapter provides information about all of these markets, plus relationship coaching specializations that are growing.

You have reached the end of the free sample of the FabJob Guide to Become a Relationship Coach. To order and download the complete guide go to www.fabjob.com/program/become-relationship-coach.


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FabJob Guide to Become a Relationship Coach · FabJob Guide to Become a Relationship Coach ... Dr. Phil, Fox & Friends, The ... in response to our request for advice for prospective