Gujju WivesOnce 4 gujju wives met at a party talking about their husbands new cellular phones....First gujju wife says to others... "Maro pati ne pass mota laura(motorola) che!....Second gujju wife replies.."Aree sirf mota laura thi kya hoga? errection(ERICSSON) chahiye!....So the third gujju wife stepa up & says..."aree mota laura bhi thick hai, errection bhi thick hai, Par semen(seimens) nahi to kya fayda?...And then the fourth said.."Mota laura bhi ho, errecson bhi ho, semen bhi ho, lekin na kiya(nokiya) tho kya fayda??**********************Story of Akbar and Tansen Tansen was a high ranking official in King Akbar's court. However he had one longstanding wish - to suck the queen's voluptuous breasts to his heart's desire. Every time he passed the queen he would get frustrated. He revealed his desire to Birbal one day, and begged him to do something about it. Birbal, after much thought, agreed on the condition that Tansen could suck the breasts to his desire but later he would have to pay Birbal 1000 gold coins for it. Tansen agreed. The next day Birbal prepared a high voltage itching lotion and poured it into the queen's bra while she was taking a bath. Soon the itching started and grew in intensity much to the king's anxiety. Consultations with doctors and Birbal revealed that a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure it. Birbal also added that such a saliva was only in Tansen 's mouth. Akbar summoned Tansen and for the next 4 hours Tansen violently sucked the queen's breasts. Licking, biting, pressing, playing he got what he always desired. Satisfied he returned back and met Birbal, but in his lust and since his mission was over, he refused to pay Birbal anything and in fact shooed him away. Tansen of course knew that Birbal could never report this matter to the emperor since he was instrumental in it himself. What Tansen did not know was what Birbal would do the next day......Scroll down ....... !! ! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"Birbal duly put that lotion in Emperor Akbar's underwear"*********************HelenHelen was in her late thirties and still not married. She just had a hard time meeting men. And the men she did meet all ended up being jerks. Finally, she decided to place an ad in the personals in the newspaper.Helen wrote: "Looking for a man who wont beat me, wont leave me, and is excellent in bed." .. Several days went by and she hadnt gotten a single call. Then, one day she was doing her laundry when she heard a knock on the door. She walked upstairs to answer it. She opened the door and saw a man in a wheelchair with no arms and no legs. "Can I help you?" Helen asked. .. He said, "I am the man of your dreams!" .. Helen was baffled. She said, "Excuse me." .. "I read your personal ad in the paper and I am the perfect man for you. I have no arms, so I cant beat you. I have no legs, so I can never leave you." .. "But are you good in bed?" Helen asked. .. He replied, "How do you think I knocked on the door?!"****************Second HoneymoonSanta and Jeeto were planning to go on a second honeymoon for their 10th wedding anniversary.Jeeto said, "We will go to all the same places that we did on our first honeymoon.""As you wish," said Santa."Will we do all the things that we did on our first honeymoon?" asked Jeeto."Ok," said Santa."And will we make love like we did on our first honeymoon?" asked Jeeto."That's right," said Santa, "except this time I get to sit on the side of the bed and cry, 'It's too big, it's too big!'" ************************...