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By Karen C. Green
RIETS Rosh Yeshiva Rabbi Dr. Zevulun (Sidney Z.) Lieberman z”l (YC 51, RIETS 54, FGS 59) passed away this week and wiil be remembered fondly by community members were his students and campers at Hillel Day School, Ramaz Yeshiva, and Camp Massad. “Rabbi Zevulan (Sidney) Lieberman was an outstanding Jewish educator and pulpit rabbi who positively touched the hearts of thousands of students and congregants over the years. His son Hillel was martyred sav-ing Torah scrolls from Kever Yosef during the second Intifada. He leaves behind a legacy of love for Israel, the Jewish people and the To-rah, “ said Yoel Moskow-itz who was a camper at Camp Massad.
Rabbi Lieberman’s illustrious career also included his tenure as head of both the Syrian Community Bet Din and the Vaad Harabonim of Flatbush. He was the re-vered senior Rabbi (and later Rabbi Emeritus) of Congregation Beth Torah in Brooklyn for over 52 years.
Prior to his tenure at Hillel, Rabbi Lieber-man, an erudite historian, arrived at Yeshi-vah of Flatbush in 1954 and served as High School Administrator, Assistant Principal and Acting Principal and then Principal of General Studies until he ended his tenure in 1966. He was an integral contributor to the development of the Joel Braverman High School from its founding days. He continued in the fi eld of Jewish education as Headmas-ter of the Ramaz School and Principal of Hil-lel Day.
Most recently he held the Maxwell R. Maybaum Memorial Chair in Talmud and Sephardic Codes (Halacha) at RIETS.
In October 2000, Rabbi Lieberman his son Hillel HYD was tragically murdered by a Palestinian mob on his way to Kever Yoseph.
Condolences to his wife Bracha, his daughters Tehila and Eliora, his brother Hon. Paul Lieberman and the entire family.
VOL 11, NO 49 ■ DECEMBER 21, 2012 / 8 TEVET 5773 WWW.THEJEWISHSTAR.COM
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Hi-tech match gets rabbinic nodBy Malka Eisenberg
The recent launch of an Orthodox Jewish website combining scientifi cally researched measures of compatibility with rabbinic consent (haskama) has drawn interest from 20,000 visitors and over 2,800 registrants.
ZivugZone.com is a project of Moshe Coan, a psychotherapist and marriage coun-selor who has worked with singles and cou-ples for 15 years in his practice in Passaic and
Teaneck, New Jersey. He notes on his website that he developed a unique sys-tem that whit-tles down pos-sible matches to only show those that are most compat-ible.
“I have been thinking of doing this for a num-ber of years,” said Coan via email. “I have always felt it imperative to do anything I could to help the singles in
my community get married. My wife and I were always thinking of whom we could set up and when we fi nally set up my best friend, we dedicated ourselves to making this proj-ect of ours a reality. As a psychotherapist and marriage counselor, I had always used my understanding of personality dynam-ics in making my dating suggestions to the
Continued on page 3
Five Towns leaders address post Connecticut securityBy Malka Eisenberg
As members of communities the world over remain saddened and shaken by the shootings of 20 children and six adult staff members at a Connecticut elementary school, schools and institutions are left to ponder if there is any way to learn from this and prevent this from happening again.
Rep. Carolyn McCarthy (D-NY4) released a statement noting that “There are a lot of unanswered questions right now, but one thing is clear – there’s too much gun violence in our country. These shootings are becom-ing all too common, and it’s too easy for dan-gerous people to get the weapons that help them perform mass executions like today’s. We owe it to our children to work harder to reduce gun violence. The Second Amend-ment is the law of the land but it was never intended to allow murderers to take the lives of innocent kids. It’s our moral obligation as policymakers and as parents to do more to
save lives.”It is “a very complex issue with no easy
answers,” said Dr. Michael J. Salamon, Se-nior Psychologist and Director of ADC Psy-chological Services in Hewlett. He sum-marized what is known “about individuals who commit such acts”: the situations are carefully planned, the shooter has uncertain family connections and limited parental su-pervision, has diffi cult social interactions and problems in school, a mental illness diagno-sis, possibly incomplete and untreated and more than one disorder making a violent tendency more likely since it is diffi cult to treat. These individuals may turn to brutal fantasies with the use of violent video games and movies and, with a compromised psy-chological background, might act out these fantasies. That, coupled with access to and lack of training or evaluation in the use of weapons, they are most likely to use weapons to harm others. “To prevent future episodes
Continued on page 3
5T educator remembered
Rabbi Dr. Zevulun Lieberman z’’l
Children arrive at school, a place that should be a safe haven.
Engelmayer: Protecting and nurturing our young Page 5 Who’s in the kitchen: baked gefi lte fi sh Page 7 DRS Torahs are returned post-Sandy Page 10 Bookworm: Jews and Christmas in America Page 13
‘ The more per-sonality traits that a couple shares in common, the easier it is for them to negotiate the challenges of marriage and parenthood.’MOSHE COANFounder of ZivugZone.com
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The Jewish StarClassified Ads 15From the Heart of Jerusalem 14Hebrew Only Please! 6Kosher Bookworm 10Letters to the Editor 4On the Calendar 12Parsha 6Politico to Go 4Who’s in the Kitchen 7
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Chabad’s 18th Annual Chai Celebration was full of life
Rabbi Zalman and Chanie Wolowik with Honorees Ben and Sandy Gordon
Rabbi Zalman and Chanie Wolowik with honorees Gidon and Alla Shema
Honorees Larry and Esta Gordon
From left Isaac Bitton, Aaron Fischman, Rabbi Wolowik
Penina Popack and Chanie Wolowik
Close to 500 people came to pay tribute to 5 well deserving couples-- Mr. and Mrs. Ben and Sandy Gordon, Mr. and Mrs. Larry and Esta Gordon, Dr. and Dr. Yakov and Ra-chel Lowinger, Mr. and Mrs. Gidon and Alla Shema, and Mr. and Mrs. Zack and Dovi To-maszewski. These guests of honor are all good friends of Chabad and it was wonderful to see their friends, family and colleagues paying homage to them for their hard work on behalf of Chabad.
Delicious food, camaraderie, inspiration, humor, and fun were all part of Chabad’s 18th Annual Dinner celebration, which was held on December 16 the Grand Ballroom of the Sep-hardic Temple. The dinner gave everyone the opportunity to refl ect on the milestones we have reached as a community under the ca-pable leadership of Rabbi Zalman and Chanie Wolowik, and dynamic youth directors Rabbi Meir and Hadassah Geisinsky and to recog-nize the important work that Chabad of the Five Towns continues to do for the commu-nity. What an incredible evening it was!! The spirit and energy were palpable and hundreds of action packed pictures were taken by Vi-sion’s Fine Photography and exceptional video was taken by Three Star Photography.
Genadeen Caterers did a spectacular job. The food was great and the atmosphere el-egant. Once at their tables, guests enjoyed the gorgeous pink orchids and silver tablecloths compliments of Jerusalem Florist and Premier
Skirting.Guests were treated to an upbeat video
presentation that highlighted the many suc-cessful programs that Chabad offers. It ac-knowledged all staff and volunteers who continue to work hard to help with Chabad’s outreach efforts.
The video taped messages from the Hon-orees and their families kept everyone’s atten-tion as they detailed their commitment and involvement in Chabad. Gan Chamesh par-ents of the year, Zack and Dovi Tomaszewski, demonstrated their feelings that Chabad is an extension of their family with their “Tomasze-wski Bunch” rendition.
Guests of honor were presented with beau-tiful custom artwork and Penina Popack re-ceived a special mention to thank her for all her hard work on behalf of the dinner. Exqui-site memory albums are being prepared for each honoree, to include personalized letters and tributes.
Everyone danced enthusiastically to the upbeat music provided by Gary Wallin Or-chestras. The guests enjoyed the sumptuous dessert buffet and had a chance to take their pictures in the photo booth provided.
Guests were given an elegantly wrapped copy of “Miracle in the Ashes”, generously donated by the Lowingers in memory of their grandfather.
What a meaningful way to end a beautiful evening.
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singles I worked with. I then said to myself, ‘why don’t I parlay my knowledge of marital compatibility into a personality compatibil-ity matching system?’ Thus ZivugZone.com was born. The project took almost a year to complete, since it involved complex software programming. For that, I turned to a top programming fi rm to bring forward the con-cept into the wonderful reality that exists to-day. The programmers spent countless hours working out the bugs so that ZivugZone.com would be user friendly and easy to navigate.”
The website is operated from Passaic and is free. Sample questions were not available since it is copywrited, but Coan recommends that those singles who are interested, register a profi le and take the 25 minute personality test. The age range is 18 to 75, noted Coan since the site caters to “singles of every age range.” People have signed up from “every Orthodox community in the world,” he point-ed out, including Brooklyn, Queens, Passaic, Monsey, the Five Towns, Teaneck, Lakewood, London, Toronto, Los Angeles, Miami, Chi-cago, Denver, Philadelphia, Sydney, Johan-nesburg, Tel Aviv, Yerushalayim, etc.”
The website opened in July 2012 and Coan announced their fi rst engagement, of Alisa Kahn-Rose of North Hollywood, Los Angeles, California and Jordan Roysman of Plainview, Long Island, New York, on Mon-day. This, said Coan, refl ects “the fact that we now have reached critical mass and many engagements are to be expected.”
ZivugZone.com was reviewed by and has the haskamos of Harav Moshe Heinemann, Shlita, Rav of Agudas Yisroel of Baltimore and Rabbinic Administrator of Star-K Kashrus and HaRav Shlomo Singer, Rosh HaYeshiva of Passaic Torah Insti-tute, Passaic, NJ.
To join, a single fi lls out the reg-istration form, chooses to commu-nicate with other singles through Zmail, the website’s in-house email system, or through a shadchan (matchmaker), takes the ZivugZone personality compatibility test, and then reviews potential matches and reads profi les. The test is based on scientifi c research conducted on thousands of happily married couples, explained Coan, and evalu-
ates the applicant’s opinions on many topics and situations. It doesn’t have to be complet-ed in one sitting. Matches will be displayed immediately upon completion and, as others join, new matches will be added. Matches are based on hashkafah (philosophy) as well as personality; profi les indicate the member’s hashkafah.
Members can choose to communicate either with their email system or through a shadchan of their choos-ing, but not with both options si-multaneously, although they can switch from one to the other by in-dicating that they want to switch on the website. Individuals only have their fi rst names and middle, and last initials listed to protect privacy and confi dentiality. Coan had no date stories to tell. “When people go out on dates,” he said, “what happens on the date is personal and private. I would not expect some-one to publicize that information
about their experience on a date whom they don’t know.”
Coan explained the “compatibility princi-
ple,” the basis for the website, that “the morepersonality traits that a couple shares in com-mon, the easier it is for them to negotiate the challenges of marriage and parenthood. They come to share similar perspectives onkey issues of married life because they are temperamentally alike. This is not to say that the couple should be a carbon copy of each other. A certain amount of personality dif-ference promotes growth as the spouses are forced to examine their weaknesses. How-ever, research studies show that when the couple shares core personality traits, they fi nd it easier to develop emotional intimacy and collaborate.”
Coan cited comments praising the site, one stating that it is “the best possible meth-od for a dating website in the frum (Ortho-dox) world,” and thanks for “setting up this site and making networking so much easierfor people.”
For more information, go to ZivugZone.com. For questions or comments, contact Moshe Coan at [email protected].
of these types of tragedies requires a concert-ed effort to identify and care for individuals with emotional, behavioral and psychologi-cal needs; to limit the degree of violence our children are exposed to,” he wrote, “and to restrict gun sales to only competent and well trained individuals. Even then we may never be able to prevent all such tragedies.”
“It’s such a sad event,” said Yocheved Daphna, CEO of ISS (Israeli Security Ser-vices) Action, a security company based at Kennedy Airport. “It was obviously a men-tally challenged or disturbed person.” ISS Action provides security for the NASA Space Center in Mississippi, the Brooklyn Bridge, Yeshiva South Shore, State of New York of-fi ce buildings, Japan Airlines, Swiss Air and the duty free carts for Delta and American Airlines. Company president, Yehuda Daph-na, said that they have been providing secu-rity for YSS since 9/11, when they were ap-proached by Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky. “He was well aware of the sakanah (danger) and decided to start security there.” Yehuda noted that he worked in security in Israel and abroad for the Israeli government for 25 years, eight years in the IDF and the rest in Europe. He said that he, as one of the highest ranking offi cers in intelligence, was personally asked by Golda Meir to help the Europe division immediately after the terror-ist attack at the Munich Olympics. After a detour into food chemistry, he ended up in the U.S. and was asked by the U.S. govern-ment to control drug fl ow through JFK air-port under then President Ronald Reagan. He said that he has been working out of JFK controlling drugs from Colombia and South America “going back 22 years.”
“It’s very important to keep all doors locked at all times,” stressed Yocheved. Ye-huda emphasized the need to lock windows as well. “Kids leave a big stone at the back (of the school) to keep the door open,” Yoch-eved added. “It’s important to have one route of entrance and egress. You’d be amazed at how many doors are left open.”
Yocheved also stressed the deterrent val-ue of a security guard at the entrance, and that it wasn’t always necessary for the guard
to be armed, that it depended on the location of the site. She noted that the guard at the NASA center fi red his weapon only once in 19 years. She said that it is different from po-lice and also different from Israel where they are dealing with known threats of terrorism. Jews here, she added, have the “mindset of Israeli security.”
“In Texas and the West, a lot, even the teachers, have guns,” said Yehuda. “If they know that the teachers have guns, they (the attackers) won’t come in. In Israel, there is a security guard with a gun in the schools—it’s a must for every school. But having a gun is not enough. Having a bullet proof vest on the security guard is as important as a gun in Israel because they will be confronting some-one with a gun.” He said that most New York City detectives have never fi red their weap-ons, but have them just in case. “It’s a de-terrent,” he said. A guard with a uniform is important; an observer doesn’t know if the guard has a gun or not.
Background checks of teachers and all employees, including custodial staff, are nec-essary, stressed Yehuda. “About fi ve years ago one of the yeshivos approached me,” he recalled. “They needed fi ngerprinting for
teachers for grants. I said that it was a good opportunity to get all the people who work there to be fi ngerprinted. They all ran away. A lot may have criminal records.”
Schools should have a buzzer system and metal detectors, Yehuda said. “Security sees who is coming in. The buzzer system is the best thing. Security checks everybody who comes in. If they don’t know who the person is, they don’t let him in. Especially in kinder-garten, what if a parent wants to take a kid, there are cases of divorce. It is a must in any kindergarten.”
“It takes a community as well,” stressed Yocheved. “People need to be aware of their surroundings. If I see a package or some-thing, I make the phone call. I was once in the Gourmet Glatt parking lot and I saw a car running with no one in the car, license plates from North Carolina and the trunk had duct tape on it. It looked unusual so I called 911. There could have been a bomb in the trunk. The police came and it was a delivery person. But everyone has to be more vigilant and not be complacent.”
With the country focused on security, Nassau County Executive Edward P. Manga-no asked the Nassau County Police Depart-
ment to host its fourth Active Shooter Semi-nar on January 7th at 9:00 a.m. at Adelphi University. The program is for private and public schools, corporations and hospitals.An active shooter is an attacker armed with a gun, knife or other weapon, who has used deadly physical force on other persons andmay continue to attack other victims. The seminar will cover preparation, early detec-tion and maintaining close contact with the police department. “On behalf of NassauCounty’s 1.3 million residents,” said Manga-no, “I express my deepest condolences to the victims and families of the terrible tragedythat took place on Friday at the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecti-cut. While we all hope to never face such an active shooter situation, Nassau Countyis leading the nation in preparing school ad-ministrators. The safety of our children is ofparamount concern and, working with theNassau County Police Department, we will continue to advance preventative measures that enhance education and preparedness.”
To participate in the Active Shooter Semi-nar contact the Nassau County Police Depart-ment, Offi ce of Community Affairs, at 516573-7360.
Local leaders address post Connecticut securityContinued from page 1
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Hi-tech matchmaking gets rabbinic approval
Moshe Coan
Metal detectors and x-ray machines are cited by security experts as necessary for school safety
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Opinion
N ow that the election is over, Barack Obama no longer has to appeal to sup-porters of Israel or haters of terrorism.
Progressive Jews no longer have to lie—call-ing him a great president for Israel. As he told Russian president Medvedev after the election, he will have more fl exibility.
According to sources in Washington, Pres-ident Obama’s fi rst demonstration of that fl exibility will be to appoint former Senator Chuck Hagel to replace Leon Panetta as Sec-
retary of Defense.“Bloomberg News
reported Thursday that President Barack Obama spoke to Hagel about the position on December 4.
Hagel, who served two terms in the Unit-ed States Senate repre-senting his home state of Nebraska, has been a member of the Presi-dent’s Foreign Intelli-gence Advisory Board as well as a member of the faculty of George-town University since leaving Capitol Hill in 2009.”
My sources tell me he has already been vetted by the White House Staff.
Why should supporters of Israel be wor-ried about Hagel?
Consider that, as a Senator, Hagel voted against designating the Iranian Revolution-ary Guard Corps as a terrorist organization, refused to call on the E.U. to designate He-zbollah a terrorist group, and consistently voted against sanctions on Iran for their il-licit pursuit of nuclear weapons capability. And bragged about not being beholden to the “Jewish Lobby.”
Josh Block, head of the Israel Project, says, “It is a matter of fact that [Hegal’s] re-cord on these issues puts him well outside the mainstream Democratic and Republican consensus.”
Don’t take my word for it; in an attempt to be bi-partisan, I posted below a summary of what the National Jewish Democratic Coun-cil (NJDC) warned about Sen. Hagel’s lousy record on Israel in 2007. (They took the page down when Obama began to express interest in Hagel for his administration, but I saved a copy). Below are some of the details:
•In August 2006, Hagel was one of only 12 Senators who refused to write the EU ask-ing them to declare Hezbollah a terrorist or-ganization.
•In October 2000, Hagel was one of only 4 Senators who refused to sign a Senate let-ter in support of Israel.
•In November 2001, Hagel was one of only 11 Senators who refused to sign a letter urging President Bush not to meet with the late Yasser Arafat until his forces ended the violence against Israel.
•In December 2005, Hagel was one of only 27 who refused to sign a letter to Presi-dent Bush to pressure the Palestinian Author-ity to ban terrorist groups from participating in Palestinian legislative elections.
•In June 2004, Hagel refused to sign a let-ter urging President Bush to highlight Iran’s nuclear program at the G-8 summit.
In 2008, Hagel blocked an Iran sanctions bill that Senate Democrats supported. That same year, he gave a speech calling for the opening of a U.S. diplomatic post in Tehran. As early as 2001, Hagel said that sanctions on Iran and Libya were ineffective. He was one of only two senators that year to vote against renewal of the Iran-Libya Sanctions Act, the other being the soon to be former senator Richard Lugar (R-IN).
I don’t want to leave you with the impres-sion that everyone hates Hagel’s record on Israel. The same NJDC article did cite one group that supported Hagel’s Middle East ef-forts--CAIR, the Council on American-Islamic Relations.
According to the FBI, CAIR was formed by the Muslim Brotherhood and has ties to Hamas. CAIR is a big fan of Hagel:
“Potential presidential candidates for 2008, like Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Joe Biden and Newt Gingrich, were falling all over themselves to express their support for Israel. The only exception to that rule was Senator Chuck Hagel …” [Council on Ameri-can-Islamic Relations, 8/28/06].
Iran’s state-owned Press TV seemed hap-py when they wrote that Hagel was Obama’s number one choice for defense:
Some in the Israeli lobby have reportedly reacted with alarm to reports of Hagel’s nom-ination, as he is known as an outspoken critic of the Zionist lobby in Washington.
Then there was that nice little speech he made during the Senate debate about the surge where he seemed to justify terrorism by the Palestinians “who have been chained down.”
Senator Hagel often appears before Arab-American groups to air his views regarding the Middle East. Among the gems of wisdom: support for Israel shouldn’t be automatic.
He has also joined a chorus of people sur-rounding Barack Obama who use the anti-Semitic meme about the so-called Jewish Lobby.
Says Hagel: “The political reality is that... the Jewish lobby intimidates a lot of people up here.” There are many millions of Ameri-cans who are not Jewish, who support the American-Israel relationship. Hagel pushes the anti-Semitic meme that Jews control American foreign policy (if they did--they would do a better job than this administra-tion).
Supporters of Syrian President Assad will be happy to know that Hagel has always been a big supporter of the despot and his father (also a despot). After meeting with daddy Assad in 1998, Hagel said, “Peace comes through dealing with people. Peace doesn’t come at the end of a bayonet or the end of a gun.”
In 2008, Hagel co-authored a Wall Street Journal op-ed with prospective secretary of state nominee Sen. John Kerry (D-MA), en-titled, “It’s time to talk to Syria.”
“Syria’s leaders have always made cold calculations in the name of self-preservation, and history shows that intensive diplomacy can pay off,” Hagel and Kerry wrote.
Ira Forman, who was in charge of the Obama reelection campaign’s outreach to Jewish voters, said in 2009, after Hagel was named co-chairman of the President’s For-eign Intelligence Advisory Board, that he would have opposed Hagel’s nomination for a more substantive position. Let’s see if he follows through should (as it seems) Hagel become Obama’s pick to run the Defense De-
partment.Will the President pick Hagel despite his
anti-Israel and anti-Semitic positions? Anti-Israel propagandists are thrilled. Stephen Walt, who along with John Mearsheimer, wrote the Anti-Semitic book “The Israel Lobby and U.S. Foreign Policy,” writes thatif President Obama nominates Hagel, it will be “a smart move.” Because, “unlike almostall of his former colleagues on Capitol Hill, he hasn’t been a complete doormat for theIsrael lobby.” Indeed, says Walt, a Hagel pick would “pay back Benjamin Netanyahu for all the ‘cooperation’ Obama received from him during the fi rst term.”
As Defense Secretary, Chuck Hagel would play a key role in working with his Israelicounterparts when formulating strategies that would promote our mutual interests in the region. The Israeli and American defense industries and departments have a long re-cord of working closely together-an alliance that has been mutually benefi cial and that has proven crucial in giving Israel the toolsshe has needed to defend herself from a wide range of adversaries boasting of her coming destruction, and the U.S. the benefi ts of Is-rael’s years of counter-terrorism experience.
The Secretary of Defense is a key player in our fi ght against terrorism. Yet Hagel does not believe Hezbollah is a terrorist group, thinks we should be talking to Hamas and believes Iran isn’t a threat. This man cannotbe the best choice for America.
Jeff Dunetz is the Editor/Publisher of thepolitical blog “The Lid” (www.jeffdunetz.com). Jeff contributes to some of the largest politi-cal sites on the internet including American Thinker, Big Government, Big Journalism, NewsReal and Pajama’s Media.
Letter to the editor
No autism-violence linkDear Editor:
We join the nation in mourning the lives lost on Friday in Newtown, Conn. Kulanu, an organization that works diligently to pro-vide inclusive opportunities for those with special needs, is distressed by the media and the nation’s rush to understand the reason-ing for this terrible occurrence by intimat-ing that the alleged shooter had a possible autism diagnosis. We wish to highlight The Autism Society’s stance that it is imperative to remove autism from this tragic story.
The Autism Society, committed to in-forming, educating and securing appropriate services by offering reliable and unbiased in-formation, provided the following myths to be dispelled about individuals with autism:
· No evidence exists to link autism and premeditated violence. Suggesting otherwise is wrong and harmful to the more than 1.5
million individuals living with autism in the United States.
· Individuals with autism and those with other disabilities are more likely to be victims of violence than the perpetrators.
· Many of the individuals with Asperg-er’s syndrome who have committed crimes had co-existing psychiatric disorders.
· Individuals with autism who act aggressively typically do so because they are reacting to a situation.
Please do not judge any individual with autism based on the discourse surrounding Friday’s tragic event. Instead, please strive to educate and inform your communities.
Please consider forwarding or sharing this information with a friend.
Sincerely,Amy L. Eisenberg
Director, Parent Advocacy & Resource Center (PARC)
A Division of Kulanu
POLITICO TO GO
Jeff Dunetz
Will President Obama appoint anti-Jewish, anti-Israel Chuck Hagel to be Secretary of Defense?
THE JEWISH STARIndependent and original reporting from the Orthodox communities of Long Island and New York City
All opinions expressed are solely those of The Jewish Star’s editorial staff or contributing writers
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F or many reasons, this was a sad week in our country. The obvious reasons loom over Newtown, Connecticut and words
cannot express how sad and empty we all feel. There are no good answers when chil-dren are harmed, much worse killed. They
are the most vulnerable among us and they look to us; they rely on those older, wiser and hopeful-ly more reasoned to keep them safe and guide them into adulthood so that they can do the same. We have failed in so many ways.
When the school that I attended as a teenager was exposed in the For-ward and then the New York Times this week for having allegedly cov-
ered up or somehow given passes to faculty misconduct toward the students, my heart dropped. This “great” institution of learning and Jewish continuity was shamed in public, and all of the memories I have as a young man came fl ooding in. My heart, however, did not drop for the disgrace Yeshiva Uni-versity faces, it dropped because somehow I think that perhaps I might have been dis-graced, too.
You see, I knew the stories of Rabbi Fin-kelstein all too well. People close to me were his targets; I also knew people who were cho-sen more often than others; I also knew that “everyone” at school knew it, too. Yet did I, did my friends, do all they could to call atten-tion to it? Was it a 14, 15, 16, or 17 year old’s responsibility to that?
That is what gets me. This was not a new revelation in the mid nineties when Rabbi Lamm apparently asked this principal to leave quietly. That might have been the tip-ping point, when a parent fi nally threatened to expose the school for the shenanigans that went on there for what seems to be over two decades. It certainly was not news to any-one.
I was fortunate not to have been one of the wrestlers. The man disliked me too much to do that, and I was probably too tall any-how. He picked on the kids who were a little shorter and many whose parents were not the type to raise a fuss. In one case, it was parents who did not even live in the country. Yet, I knew. I told my father, who probably thought it was more trumped up hype from some of us disenchanted YU boys. It was only more recently, after some of my previ-ous articles were published on this, and later, the full accounting by someone other than his son in the various media over the past year, that it hit him.
That school left scars. Looking now on comments to the New York Times article made this week from my former classmates on Facebook, the wounds have not quite healed for some, and Rabbi Lamm’s excuse that the atmosphere for reporting these types of issues was not present back then is no sol-ace.
(’87 Graduate #1) “He (Rabbi Lamm) needs to suffer for this. Who knows how many lives were damaged by the abuse, and sadly, how many went on to become abusers themselves. I can’t guess who knew what, but we know Lamm knew. There’s no excusing him.”
(’87 Graduate #2) Well George obviously
did not surprise me. Lamm’s comments were shocking and I fi nd that blaming it all on Is-rael Miller who is dead is disgusting.”
(’87 Graduate #4) “Nothing like remi-niscing of old times to bring people together. I remember it being common knowledge that Finkelstein would wrestle with some guys. I think XXX told me he did it to him and XXX punched him in his face when it got weird. I guess I wasn’t his type.”
As I said, we all knew. Not to say that mere wrestling per se is a bad thing. Argu-ably, it is a good way to connect with students and blow off steam. However, the brand of wrestling and the seemingly personal and intimate nature it allegedly took for enough people to be uncomfortable with the experi-ence, is quite wrong.
That Rabbi Lamm did not know is as ab-surd to many of us as was the fact that we were subject to that behavior in the fi rst place. The school left a dark memory for so many of us.
As I wrote earlier in an article, not ev-eryone was subject to the darkness. The students who were on top of their games, in good Judaic and Talmud classes and who were academics, I do not believe – and I em-phasize that it is my belief and not a sure fact – shared in the experiences many of us in the lower classes had. Yet, even many of those students knew, too.
Not just the wrestling. We had one rabbi who was so frustrated with a certain student who admittedly was challenging; either in-tentionally or impulsively, it did not matter because MTA was ill equipped to handle such students properly. This rabbi of a multi-grade classroom of kids who had diffi culties learning Torah one day asked his students to
bring in rope and duct tape and the next day, tied and wrapped this one child from head to toe and made him sit there for the duration of the morning lessons.
When his mother tried to complain, she was convinced to let it slide for the best in-terest of her older son in the school and not to be seen in her community as the one to challenge such an esteemed institution. Her younger son left and went to one of New York’s elite high schools – proving that he was not learning disabled, but maybe un-inspired; yet, his life since has been one of personal emotional challenges to a fairly sig-nifi cant degree. His brother and I just talkedthis week after the stories ran and we both cannot be certain that that experience didnot leave its mark. That rabbi went on to be a principal, too, in another Jewish day school.
To Rabbi Lamm’s point that, “This was before things of this sort had attained cer-tain notoriety,” “There was a great deal of confusion,” I and his other students dis-agree. There was nothing confusing about it; we knew it was something that we had no control over or any power to challenge. Anyone who made a fuss left the school and that person would then be ostracized. Rabbi Finkelstein, Rabbi Lamm, and the head of the boy’s school at the time, Rabbi Weinbach, who passed away in 2011, were all given the responsibility to protect their children. The only confusing part was why they allowed aninstitutional tendency to insulate and pro-tect the rabbinate and individual rabbis was more valuable and important than the very kids they were put there to help nourish andgrow.
Juda Engelmayer is an executive with theNY PR agency, 5W Public Relations.
Opinion: No greater good than protecting and nurturing our young
Juda Engelmayer
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A not-too-farfetched reading of the end of Chapter 45 can indicate that only one person intended to go down
to Egypt to stay there. “… And bread and food for his father for the journey” (45:23). “He saw the wagons Yosef had sent to carry him…” (45:27) “Israel said, ‘My son Yosef still lives: I will go and I will see him before I die.’” (45:28)
It is particularly poignant that Yaakov/Yisrael was the only one excited about the journey. He travels “with all that was his” to Beer Sheva, where he brought sacrifi ces. (46:1) G-d promises to go down with him (specifi cally), and that He will take Yaakov up from Egypt. (46:3-4) Yaakov’s sons then make sure their wives and children are on the wagons that were sent “to carry him.” (46:5).
The fi nal indicators are in verses 6-7, when we see “They took their cattle and their possessions to come to Egypt: Yaakov and all his children with him.” This is followed by “His sons, grandsons, daughters and granddaughters and all of his children – he brought with him to Egypt.”
Every pronoun is in the singular – about Yaakov.
Why did they not bring all of their belong-ings in 46:1? Why does it emphasize twice (in 46:6-7) that all his children were with him – fi rst in the general sense, and then in the more specifi c – before listing them indi-vidually? Wouldn’t once be suffi cient?
And why does it say “He brought them with him to Egypt?” Why did he have to bring them? Did they not go of their own accord?
The Or HaChaim explains that they were only going in order to accompany their fa-ther, and had no intention of staying in Egypt. But after the prophesy in Beer She-va, they realized they were meant to go and stay there as well. Which is why they will-ingly and deliberately put their children on the wagons: if you’re going to go, you may as well go in style.
The Malbim further notes that the zodiac indicated there would eventually be enslave-ment, but that they personally would not be enslaved. For the shvatim (the individual tribes) themselves, there was nothing to worry about. But their children, destined to
be the fi rst ones enslaved, exhibited hesita-tion. This is why Yaakov needed to “bring them.” Would you want to be dragged along for Grandpa’s joyride if he will die soon, leav-ing you to be enslaved? Didn’t think so.
Or HaChaim applies the same thought process to some of the Shvatim themselves – that they, too, didn’t want to go, but needed Yaakov to drag them against their will.
Being dragged along for the ride of some-one else’s destiny is never easy. When adults get jobs that cause them to move, and their children are uprooted from the system and friendship circle they know so well, it can be traumatic. Those who make Aliyah to Israel are sometimes faced with this challenge with their children, especially with kids who were a little older by the time they make the move.
While any move nowadays is hardly com-parable to the destiny of being enslaved for a few generations, the natural hesitation, fears, or just plain ambivalence that comes with the prospects of the move are real chal-lenges that aren’t easily overcome.
The same is true of certain aspects of how we live. Some schools and parents are quite successful in inculcating a regimen of halakh-ic observance in their students and children.
Fathers who go to shul bring their kids to shul. Mothers who make prayer a fi xture of their lives teach their children that prayer is important to us.
We teach our sons to wear tzitzis, even though the extra garment might not be pre-ferred. We learn Torah in the home, even though a computer game or a toy or a book is more appealing right now.
At the Shabbos meal, the kids are present for the zemiros and the bentching. In fact, children learn to say their brachos before and after they eat, even though it isn’t “natural” to remember G-d all the time.
Children are given the opportunity to give tzedakah, to deduct a portion of their allow-ance. They see their parents write donation checks and understand that we do not keep for ourselves all the money we earn. There are people who are more needy.
If we volunteer at a soup kitchen, we bring our children along, when appropriate.
The fact is, while they are under our pro-tective wings and care, our children share in our destiny – whether they like it or not. We don’t have the same opportunity that Yaa-kov’s descendants had, to have an inkling of what the future will bring. But we must bring our children along for the ride, because with-out proper Jewish living in the present, there will not be a Jewish future.
Parshat Vayisgash
Bringing the Children Along
Rabbi Avi Billet
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In April 1948, the fourth battalion of the Palmach captured the Monastery of San Simon in Jerusalem; that was the key to the Kat-amon neighborhood. The ferocious counterattack came two hours later; after several hours of fi ghting, the majority of the Jewish sol-diers were killed or wounded, and they decided to retreat, leaving two men to blow up the building, together with the wounded, upon the entry of the enemy; to fall prisoner was to be tortured. At that moment, one of the wounded spoke up: “When it is cold and rainy, it is cold and rainy for the enemy, too.” The order was changed, and the rest is history...and this is possibly the lesson of Chanuka, that we just concluded....
It’s cold and rainy! (but also for the enemy ...)
Rabbi Noam Himelstein studied in Yeshivat Har Etzion and served in the Tanks Corps of the IDF. He has taught in yeshiva high schools, post-high school women’s seminaries, and headed the Torah MiTzion Kollel in Melbourne, Australia. He currently teaches at Yeshivat Orayta in Jerusa-lem, and lives with his wife and six children in Neve Daniel, Gush Etzion.
By Rabbi Noam Himelstein
H ave you heard the one about how to tell the gefi lte from all the other fi sh in the sea? Simple, it’s the one with the car-
rot on its head.....or what type of cigarettes do Jewish mothers smoke? Gefi ltered.... badam bam.
Gefi lte fi sh, usually made from ground fi sh, onions, and eggs, is a culinary delight as well as Jewish shtick for borsht belt co-medians.
Created in Europe out of religious obli-gation and a fi nancial dilemma, gefi lte fi sh survived in America due to creative adver-tising and an American Jewish desire to experi-ence faith through the stomach.
Gefi lte fi sh, usu-ally associated with the Shabbat meal, has been a Jewish custom dating back to the Talmudic period. It has also been stated that some of the ancient sages thought
of fi sh as an aphrodisiac. They believed the intoxicating odor on the Sabbath table would encourage couples to “be fruitful and multi-ply.” The Hebrew word for fi sh, dag, corre-sponds to the numerical value seven, which refl ects Hashem’s commandment, “Six days you shall labor, and do all your work; but the seventh day is a Sabbath unto the Lord.”
And here, you thought gefi lte fi sh was just a recipe your mom’s great grandmother
came up with in Europe. Read on. It was ac-tually a savvy solution to fi nancial and hala-chic issues. Poor Jewish women in Eastern and Central Europe were able to feed their families with a small amount of inexpensive kosher fi sh. They could also eat the fi sh with-out violating the prohibition against remov-ing bones on Shabbat.
The women skinned the fi sh and ground the fl esh with inexpensive ingredients such as onions, eggs, and bread before stuffi ng the mixture back into the skin for baking, hence the name, gefi lte fi sh; gefi lte is Yiddish for “stuffed.” Soon Jewish women stopped stuff-ing altogether and simply formed the mix-ture into balls for steaming or boiling.
Heard of the Mason-Dixon Line? The 49th parallel? There’s also the “gefi lte fi sh line,” separating the Eastern European regions where Jews favored the sweet, from those who preferred the peppery varieties.The “ge-fi lte fi sh line” ran through eastern Poland.
Jews living to the west, most of Poland, as well as Germany and the rest of Western Europe, ate the sweet gefi lte fi sh. Those to the east, Lithuania, Latvia and Russia, ate the peppery version. Some enjoy gefi lte fi sh swimming in a gelatinous sauce, while oth-ers, it is not too much of an exaggeration to say, would sooner eat their own intestines.
Most North Americans prefer their gefi lte fi sh served with horseradish, while Latin American Jews cook the gefi lte fi sh in tomato sauce. Some like mayonnaise as a dipping sauce; others enjoy it straight-up.
Gefi lte fi sh is typically low carb, low fat, low saturated fat, high in protein, and con-
tains Omega 3.When Jews arrived in America, they
brought their gefi lte recipes with them. Jew-ish immigrant women spent full days shop-ping for, preparing, and cooking the gefi lte fi sh. Then small businesses sprung up and, for not that much more money, gefi lte fi sh could be bought, and more time could be spent either working or caring for the family.
When delis began to spring up, canned meals became available and ethnic food stands threatened the traditional Jewish food stores, the tight-knit kosher trade was in peril. Terrifi ed small business owners and re-ligious leaders joined forces with observant advertising mavens to inspire manufacturers to produce and market kosher products. It was because of them that gefi lte fi sh rose to fame in America and ensured itself as a sym-bol of American Judaism.
The modern kosher food industry began when Joshua C. Epstein and Joseph Jacobs, convinced H.J. Heinz and Maxwell House Coffee that the kosher market could yield signifi cant profi ts. By agreeing to kosher in-spections, advertising in the Yiddish press, and designing innovative ad products like the famed Maxwell House Haggadah, Ameri-can food companies found their way into the homes of upwardly mobile urban and, later, suburban Jews. By the end of the 1950s, the kosher industry had grown tenfold from 1945, with more than 1,800 kosher products.
By the 1950s, gefi lte fi sh had become “the Jewish national dish,” according to The Jew-ish Home.
On October 20, 1954, the Jewish commu-
nity proudly celebrated the 300th anniver-sary of its arrival in America by serving ge-fi lte fi sh to the guest of honor at a New York celebration, President Dwight D. Eisenhower,
Gefi lte fi sh has defi nitely made a namefor itself in the U.S. as well as Europe, butstill Jackie Mason feels it doesn’t garner therespect it should. “We spend our whole livesgoing to Chinese restaurants, but do ever see two Chinese people asking where they canget a good piece of gefi lte fi sh?”
Below fi nd an interesting recipe for bakedgefi lte fi sh. Even those who hate gefi lte fi sh have told me they love it.
Baked Gefi lte FishIngredients;■ 2 loaves frozen gefi lte fi sh loaves, de-
frosted (I use Gourmet Glatt brand)■ 3 cubes Dorit crushed garlic (or 3 cloves
crushed garlic), slightly sautéed and drained of oil
■ 1 small onion chopped, sautéed tillgolden brown and strained of the oil
■ 3 Tbs honey■ ¼ tsp white or black ground pepper■ 1/3 tsp salt■ Canola oil for sautéing Place defrosted fi sh loaves in a bowl and
add remaining ingredientsMix well and place in an 8 x 8 baking dish
lightly greasedCover and bake for an hour and 15 min-
utes. Chill before slicing and serving. Top willlook browned due to the honey.
Who’s in the kitchen
And you thought you knew gefi lte fi sh
Judy Joszef
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After 5 long weeks of being displaced from the DRS building following Hurricane Sandy, Students and Rabbeim joined together last Monday to dance their Sifrei Torah back into the DRS Aron Kodesh. DRS expresses tremendous Hakarot HaTov to Hakadosh
Baruch Hu for bringing them back into their building, as well as to HALB Executive Direc-tor Richie Hagler, and his trusted assistant, Chaim Hollander for all the hard work they put into the building as well!
DRS HS returns home fi ve weeks after Sandy
Photo courtesy of DRSHS
Left to Right: Rabbi Elly Storch, Mr. Marc Gleitman, HALB Executive Director Mr. Richie Hagler, DRS Menahel Rabbi Yisroel Kaminetsky, Mr. Heshy Schertz, Mr. Shabsi Schreier
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By Tammy Mark
What do a U.S. Senator, a boxer, a Rhodes Scholar and an A Cappella group all have in common? They are a few of the Orthodox Jewish All Stars on the latest production from Jew in the City, and part of a successful mis-sion.
Last Thursday night as we celebrated the sixth night of Chanukah, one particular Cha-nukah party brought a new level of much needed light to the world. In honor of the release of the latest video by “Jew in the City,” founder Allison Josephs rolled out the red carpet and welcomed her devoted fans to a special viewing of “Orthodox Jewish All Stars.” The star-studded video, featuring Senator Joseph Lieberman, recording artist Alex Clare, pro boxer Dmitriy Salita, best-selling author Faye Kellerman, A Cappella group The Maccabeats, producer and writer Jamie Geller, basketball player Tamir Good-man (“the Jewish Jordan”), comedian Mendy Pellin, Rhodes Scholar Miriam Rosenbaum and Supreme Court Clerk Rochelle Shoretz, received almost 40,000 views on You Tube in just four days.
The Maccabeats, owing their own fame to the holiday of Chanukah and the power of You Tube, were at the event in all their latke-fl ipping glory. With over seven million views of their music video “Candlelight,” their suc-cess took them on a world tour with a visit to the White House. Having spent most morn-ings and some evenings during the week of Chanukah on the talk show circuit, they stopped to spend Thursday night lighting the menorah with Jew in the City fans. Guests also had the chance to meet and hear from professional boxer Dmitriy Salita.
Held at Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, orga-nized by Sarah Lasry of The Patchke Prin-cess, the event was elegant and festive, with many sponsors coming together to support the unique outreach work of Jew in the City. Five Towns resident “Azamra D.J.” Jeff Neck-enoff provided the music and kept everyone entertained.
The driving force behind the Jew in the City enterprise is Allison Josephs. From a weekend in Toronto as Scholar-in Residence
to engaging the press on the red carpet, the mother of four never seems to slow down. Modestly dressed and fashionably styled by Sharon Langert of Fashion-isha, Allison lit up as she greeted her fans and friends.
Allison’s success as an internet sensation did not in any way begin as a search for star-dom. When Allison was just eight years old, a local tragedy rocked her innocent world and thrust her into an existential crisis. A school mate was killed by her father in a double murder-suicide. Allison began questioning everyone and everything about the meaning of life.
Frustrated by even her own parents’ lack of answers, she was more bothered by the fact that nobody else seemed concerned by the questions that plagued her inquisitive mind. For so many years, she would question those around her to no avail. Although she grew up in a comfortable, traditional happy fam-ily, she never was able to rest her young mind from searching for something more. Her fam-ily was culturally Jewish, but Allison’s earli-est associations with any Orthodox Jews was that they were “dirty, smelly, ignorant, can’t speak English.” This is the impression she re-ceived from the patients that were seen at her father’s medical practice.
At age 16, Allison took a class about Tao-ism and Ethics of the Fathers, for the Taoism. It was there that Allison was formally intro-duced to the wisdom of the Torah and the beauty of her own heritage. She realized that the Torah was the treasure she was searching for, a gem that was clouded and hidden from so many people.
As Allison continued her studies, pursuing a philosophy degree at Columbia University, she grew in her learning and Torah obser-vance. She would enlist random classmates to learn with her. A chance encounter with a reporter who had disturbing misconceptions about observant Jews made her realize how uninformed the world was. Allison’s life and purpose began to come further into focus as she honed in on her mission – to show others that Torah is a treasure. “We need to be able to show our gems and remove any blockades that cloud them,” says Allison.
Out of college, Allison spent several years working at outreach organizations such as
Partners in Torah and Sinai Retreats. She reached many people and touched many lives. She was even successful on the home front as her entire family became observant. But still she knew she could do more. As the Internet brought the world closer together and You Tube democratized the media, Alli-son saw that she had the power to reach out to Jewish people worldwide. She observed how previously unknown people became In-ternet sensations and realized that this was to be her next step. She quit her two pay-ing jobs to pursue her vision and about seven years ago, Jew in the City was born. “Ex-treme Makeover:
Orthodox Edition” she calls it.Writing, producing, directing and starring
in all of her videos, Allison relies on her friend Elliot Gabor for the videography and other technical elements. Allison has created enter-taining videos ranging from the signifi cance of a married woman covering her hair, to the Jewish outlook on fi nancial freedom, to the meaning of the ritual bath. All of the topics are covered in a friendly and fun way. She has received overwhelming positive feedback and amassed fans and followers from all over the world. Her most viewed video discussed the integration of science and Torah and fea-tured her good friend, and learning partner, actress Mayim Bialik. That particular video, released last year, garnered well over 200,000 You Tube views. Keenly aware of how celebri-ty sells in modern society, Allison decided she could do even more to change the perception of Orthodox Jews if she could highlight some of the most successful and prominent ones.
Allison set her sights on securing her Or-thodox all-stars. From pitching Senator Li-eberman at the elevator leaving an awards dinner, to using every possible connection she could fi nd to reach international recording artist Alex Clare, this latest endeavor has cer-tainly taken her to places far and wide. Clare, who became Orthodox fi ve years ago, is best known for his hit song “Too Close” which was featured on a commercial for Microsoft and spent 33 weeks on Billboard’s Top Ten list. The most surreal moment according to Al-lison was defi nitely when she found herself waiting backstage at Clare’s concert to shoot him for the video. Clearly, Allison’s passion
and tenacity paid off. One of her famous all-stars was on board
from the start. Professional boxer Dmitriy Salita was initially introduced to Jew in the City by his wife Alona. Together, they have been fans of Allison’s work for a while. Feel-ing somewhat isolated in the world of pop culture, Dmitriy personally reached out to her a few years back. At the launch party the soft-spoken gentleman says the timing of this video release is signifi cant and symbolic. “The message of Chanukah is to spread light to the world. The value of the Internet is that you can reach so many people, even people without a community or shul. This is tremen-dous work and I’m honored to be in the fi rst All Star video.”
While she’s already gotten many sugges-tions for the next All Star video (there are quite a few more actually), Allison feels the need to showcase the hidden stars now. The Satmar women, for example, who stock the hospitality rooms in hospitals and provide pa-tients and their loved ones with kosher food and provisions without fail and without fan-fare. She is truly determined to breakdown the negative stereotypes of all groups of Or-thodox Jews.
Her ultimate vision is broader still. Allison would love to be able to do follow-up work with the fans who reach out to her. She has lots of other ideas she is hoping to see come to fruition. Her only obstacle is the funding to make it all happen. Other than her speak-ing engagements, Jew in the City is primarily self-funded and Allison relies on the network of sponsors.
Many of those sponsors are part of the amazing group of people that helped put the evening together. The event was all at once magical and grounded in reality and purpose at the same time. As the guests mingled in-side, the Gift of Life Bone Marrow Foundation table was able to sign up 60 new names to their donor registry. While the red carpet and celebrity cache abounded, all in attendance understood that the message was not about self-promotion but spreading the light of Ju-daism throughout the Jewish community and to the world at large. Light is defi nitely some-thing the world cannot have enough of right now.
Jewish Stars in the CityPhoto courtesy of Tammy Mark
Jew in the City creator Allison Josephs poses with boxer Dimitriy Salita and The Maccabeats
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Dec 21–22LawrenceCongregation Beth SholomScholar in ResidenceRabbi Benjamin Blech
Internationally recognized educator,religious leader, author & lecturer.Talmud professor at Yeshiva University &Rabbi Emeritus of Young Israel of Oceanside.7:45 p.m. Friday night Oneg at Congregation
Beth Sholom: “The Sistine Secrets:Michelangelo’s Forbidden Messages”Shabbat AM: Drasha4:15PM: “Confronting the Ultimate Crisis:A Rabbi’s Response”Congregation Beth Sholom is located at 390
BroadwayLawrence, New York 11559
Dec 30LawrenceCongregation Beth SholomGuest Speaker and Breakfast
Elana Stein HainCommunity Scholar, Lincoln Square Syna-
gogue.Adjunct Professor at NYU & has served on theWexner Institute Faculty.Currently completing her doctorate in religion
at Columbia University.“Honoring Parents: (Re)reading the Ten Com-
mandments”Sponsored by the Hiller Familyin memory ofSusie & Leonard Hiller k”z &Sonia Hiller k”z
Dec 31Laugh” in the New Year with Kosher Komedy New Year’s Eve 2013 @ Back-stage
Please join us for an evening of great food, drinks and laughs featuring an All Star Lineup
of the funniest & cleanest comedians as seen on The Tonight Show, Letterman, Craig Ferguson, VH1, E! and Comedy Central at the
ONLY Comedy Club where the food and the comics are both KOSHER!
Doors open for Dinner and Drinks at 7:30 p.m.Showtime at 9:30 p.m.Backstage is located at 948 Broadway, Wood-
mere, NY 11598Reservations Required.Dinner & Show Package $85.00 pp includes:
Glatt Kosher Dinner, Comedy Show, 2 Drinks plus
Champagne Toast at Midnight, DJ and Dancing after Show.
Proceeds from the show to benefi t several local charities for victims of hurricane Sandy.
“Split The Pot” Raffl e tickets available the night of the event!
For reservations or more information please call 516.983.7654
Email: [email protected] a chance to win free tix!Follow us on Twitter @KosherKomedyLike Kosher Komedy on Facebook
White House Chief of Staff Jack Lew received an honor-ary degree and delivered the keynote address at Yeshiva University’s 88th Annual Hanukkah Convocation and Din-ner on Sunday, December 16. Honorary degrees were also conferred upon management consulting and investment banking executive Stanley Raskas; Moises Safra, a philan-thropist and accomplished fi nancier; and Holocaust survi-vor Diane Wasser. In addition, the public phase of YU’s capital campaign,
“Mandate to Matter,” was announced at the dinner. To date the campaign has already raised nearly $800 mil-lion of its $1 billion goal during its quiet phase, enabling YU to increase fi nancial assistance to deserving students, strengthen its faculty, research and academic programs, enhance the quality of student life, campus infrastructure, and community outreach. At the dinner, YU Trustee Ira Mitzner said that the campaign would expand to include an additional $400 million for undergraduate scholarships.
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Deadline is Wednesday of the week prior to publication.
“From Our Hearts to Your Home”, a new and exciting cookbook comprised of personal family recipes from board members, family and friends of Shaare Zedek is the “labor of love” of The Women’s Division of Shaare Zedek Medical Center. Bassie Gold, Vice President, Cookbook Chair, spear headed this project with the help of her committee, Pammy Salamon, Norma S. Hamburger, Ni-cole Wu, Susan Goldsmith, Paula Lev, Debbie Katz, Rose Friedman and Hudi Askowitz.
Well written, fun cookbooks are the gift du-jour and this cookbook is no exception. The dedicated ladies of Shaare Zedek com-
pleted this monumental task in a few short months to guarantee availability for the gift buying season. Debbie Kestenbaum, Presi-dent of the Shaare Zedek Women’s Division, is very excited about the completion of this cookbook, as it brings the wonderful work of the Women’s Division into everyone’s home.
The success of this project was cemented with over 200 pre-sale cookbooks sold. Food-ies will appreciate the wide range of interna-tional recipes from all over the United States, Israel and Canada. Everything from bubby’s traditional chicken soup to homemade baba ganoush these incredible women have cre-
ated a cookbook worthy of even the most discerning cook!
For more information regarding the cook-book or the Women’s Division at Shaare Ze-dek, please contact Blimi Sigler at [email protected] or 212-764-8118.
From the hearths at Shaare Zedek
(R) The cover of “From Our Hearts to Your Home”, a new and exciting cookbook comprised of personal family recipes
Christmas may not be universally accept-ed and observed by many Americans, however, it is America’s only national
holiday founded on religious beliefs. Its hold on many, whether through its theological and biblical message or through its musical tradition is overpowering.
Thus, any literary work that seeks to ana-lyze this unique festival from the perspective of those who do not accept its observance should prove to be most interesting. One such work is “A Kosher Christmas” by Joshua Eli Plaut [Rutgers University Press, 2012].
This work presents in a serious and aca-demic format, laced with a good sense of humor, a full present-ment of how American Jews came to adjust to either their observance or non-observance of this most glorious of Christian religious fes-tivals.
In any discussion of this topic, the meaning of “assimilation” has to
be taken into serious account. In all consid-erations, the American Jew’s self-image as both a Jew and as a newly minted American comes into serious play. The observance of Christmas by born Jews has to be considered in this perspective and all discussion has to be seen through both secular and religious prisms.
Dr. Plaut attends to this chore with a skill that goes into great historical detail. He de-fi nes both the motives and the actions of the many generations of American Jews, dating from the very foun-dation of the republic to our own times, who were to face this so-cietal challenge. Each immigrant generation’s response was differ-ent in their own unique manner.
While it is very detailed, the author’s smooth style immediately places the reader at ease, parsing all facts in clearly understandable form.
To this reader, a native of New York’s Lower East Side, any and all detail that contains geographic references to such locales as East Broadway and Henry Street, brings both a sense of warmth and sentimen-tality to the fact laden text. The shock comes when the author details the total nature of how assimilation was to envelop these newly arrived immigrants. Religious opinions, con-troversies and compromises in religious holi-day decor and placement of Christmas trees brings to mind stories told to me so long ago from those in “der alte heim” who witnessed fi rst hand the heartbreak of many over the conduct by so many others in matters that proved to be so urgent to the maintenance of community peace.
The two most pivotal chapters in this book, in this writer’s opinion, are the fi rst chapter, “Coming to the New World: Can the American Jew Keep Christmas?” and the fi fth chapter, “The Christmas Mitzvah: ‘Tis
the Season to Be Giving.” The fi rst gives a detailed and comprehensive historical re-view of the whole issue of the interface of
American Jews and the Christ-mas holiday experience. The second chapter noted deals with how American Jews, especially in the workplace, have come to help assist their Christian co-workers, neighbors and colleagues in their observance of their religious ob-ligations. While not intended as such, in my opinion this chapter is a true demonstration, in many respects, of what defi nes and constitutes “Kiddush Hashem.”
I leave it to you, the reader, to further evaluate my take on this later point.
Dr. Plaut concludes this section by stating the following:
“Jewish volunteerism on Christmas has certainly become an established American tradition through which Jews in America have made their presence known. During this joyous season – in which they are lauded by the American public for supporting the Christmas message of goodwill toward all people – they express and embody the na-tional character of ‘neighbor helping neigh-bor’.” Dr. Plaut could have given his take a more refi ned turn by stating that the mes-sage of goodwill was, and still is, a Jewish concept that predates all others.
Given the sad history of the past, can you imagine such an observation of historical facts being made of the European Jewish ex-perience during Christmas? Hardly!
Such is the greatness of America and itspeople.
FOR FURTHER STUDYSeveral articles related to this topic have
recently appeared that help in one way or an-other to further reinforce some of the impres-sions previously made.
The fi rst was an interesting observationmade by Rabbi Jason Miller on his blog en-titled, Non-Jews Doing Hanukkah, whereinhe notes how numerous entertainers have in-corporated Hanukkah and otherwise Jewishmotifs and themes into their acts and behav-ior at this time of year.
The Forward makes two recent references this past week, the fi rst by Abigail Jones,entitled, “My Very Jewish Christmas: Cel-ebrating Holiday Helped Family Assimilate inAmerica” which gives a fi rst hand, front row seat to what many of our fellow Jews faceboth in the past and present at this season.
The other essay by Benjamin Resnick is entitled, “Learning to Love Chrismukkah: Hanukkah’s History Suggest We Should Mixit Up”. Methinks that the mix up is more with Resnick and not with Hanukkah’s history. After reading this piece I can only hope thatsomeday Resnick will come to re-evaluate his observations and arrive at a fi rmer belief in the formidable strength of the Jewish faith.
Last is an essay penned in January 30, 1986 by Holocaust survivor Primo Levi, enti-tled, “Last Christmas of the War,” recently re-published in The New York Review of Books.This recall of his last months, before his lib-eration, in Monowitz, a part of Auschwitz,makes for fascinating reading by so gifted a writer and thinker. This heartfelt, sensitively written piece deserves your attention. Hope-fully, this will lead you to read further andgain a deeper appreciation of the works of Primo Levi.
Alan Jay Gerber
The Kosher Bookworm
The fi rst book on Jews and Christmas in America
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I t should have been one of the most power-ful and exciting days of my life; I can still see all the guys, in their dress uniforms,
preparing for the fi nal ceremony; instead, it was one of the most depressing. After eight of the longest, most grueling months I had ever experienced, I was three days away from receiving my offi cer’s bars. A month-long test (navigation, desert survival, weapons profi -
ciency, etc.) to enter infantry offi cer train-ing, followed by nearly four months of infantry offi cer’s training in the desert, best described as hell on earth, and then the most diffi cult four months I have ever experienced; tank offi -cer’s course. Averaging three hours sleep a day for 18 weeks, under intense pressure; this was where tank com-manders were trained by the IDF to become platoon leaders.
But three days be-fore, I was told by the
battalion commander, there wasn’t going to be any ceremony for me. I wasn’t ready, there would be no bars. I was out of the course.
They had given me every opportunity. The company commander had reviewed one of my maneuvers himself, and even the bat-talion commander attended one of my ma-neuvers, just to be sure. The decision to fail a cadet so close to the end of the course was not taken lightly. But in the end, the respon-sibility of sending someone out to command a platoon of tanks in the fi eld means only the best, and I just wasn’t ready.
Normally, once a person fails out of Of-fi cer’s course there is no second chance, but in my case, because there was no disciplin-ary measure involved (mostly it was about my struggle with Hebrew), I was told I could repeat the entire Tank offi cer’s course again, but I only had one week to think about it, as the next course was beginning in fi ve days.
The depression, of watching all your bud-dies practicing for the fi nal ceremony, as you head out into the desert to catch a ride back to civilization, is beyond description.
How does one make such a decision? Should I head back to Yeshiva, and begin my studies to become a Rabbi? Could I accept having practically wasted a year of my life? I had given it my best shot. If I went back, was it really about serving my people, and the State of Israel, or was it just a big ego trip?
The Torah does not always give us the an-swers. If I want to decide whether to eat a piece of meat, or listen in on a conversation, Jewish tradition has very clear parameters as to what the acceptable norms of behavior are. But what if I can’t decide whether to be a doctor or a lawyer? Judaism does not tell me what to do. It will tell me how to ensure that I remain an ethical lawyer, but as to whether I actually become one, that is, in the end, all up to me. So how does one decide?? What if I am making the wrong decision?
Perhaps this question lies at the root of a rather strange exchange in this week’s portion, Vayigash. Yaakov, after 22 years of believing his beloved son Joseph dead, dis-covers he is alive, and has even become the second in command of Egypt, the mightiest empire on earth. No words could possibly do justice to what Yaakov must have felt at that moment. “ Vatechi Ruach Yaakov” “ And the spirit of Yaakov lived.” (Genesis 45:27)
If your son has died, a part of you dies with him. A part of Yaakov has been dead for 22 years. Now, he is, in a sense, reborn.
“Yosef B’ni Chai, Elcha Ve’erenu be’terem Amut” ‘My son Joseph lives! I will go and see him before I die.’“Vayisa Yisrael…”
‘And Yisrael (Yaakov) journeys, with the entire family, (south towards Egypt, from the hills of Hebron), and arrives in Be’er Sheva, where he offers sacrifi ces (presumably of thanksgiving and gratitude) to “the G-d of his father Isaac.”
A long lost son and his beloved father will re-unite, and re-discover the love they thought lost forever. And then, G-d steps in. (46:2-4)“ And G-d appeared to Yisrael (Yaa-kov) in the night saying ‘Yaakov, Yaakov. And he (Yaakov) responded: ‘Hineni’ (Here I am).“And He (G-d) said: ‘I am the G-d of your father; do not fear going down to Egypt, for I will make of you there a great nation…”
Why does G-d interject with this reassur-ance? It seemed obvious that Yaakov was quite ready to head down to Egypt.
And what is the meaning of G-d’s promise to make his offspring into a great nation in that place? Yaakov just wants to see his be-loved long-lost son! And why does Yaakov offer sacrifi ces of thanksgiving ‘to the G-d of Yitzchak his father’? What of Abraham his fa-ther? And for that matter, why not just offer up to G-d? The key may lie with G-d’s calling to Yaakov in the night. ‘Yaakov, Yaakov. And he (Yaakov) responded: ‘Hineni’ (Here I am).
What does ‘here I am’ mean? What could possibly lie behind Yaakov telling G-d he is there? Obviously, G-d always knows where I am. The question is, do I know where I am?
Hineni is one of the most powerful words in the Torah, full of enormous potential. It is a word that does not refer to physical arrival, but to acceptance of a spiritual journey.
It is the word Abraham used in response to G-d’s request at the binding of Isaac (Gen-esis 22: 1) and the word Moshe responds with at the Burning Bush. Here I am; I am ready. Not only where I am, but why I am re-ally here, and what it is all about. I am fi nally ready to be what I was meant to be.
It is a word Yaakov may well have learned from his father Yitzchak, who responds ‘Hineni’ to Yaakov, when, disguised as Esau; he is ready to be blessed. Yitzchak there (Genesis 27:18) understands that this is not just a blessing; it is the continuation of a journey. In fact, in many ways, Yitzchak’s en-tire purpose was to create Yaakov. Yitzchak, after all, has only one son who carries on the tradition. It will be Yaakov who will ultimate-ly have the twelve sons that will form the Jewish people. So the word ‘Hineni’ may well signify Yitzchak’s recognition of the fact that passing on the blessings to Yaakov is really his mission and the reason he is in this world.
It is worth noting that after Yitzchak blesses Yaakov, he disappears from the scene. The Biblical narrative shifts immediately to the story of Yaakov. Yitzchak, in the word Hineni, signifi es that he understands and embraces this as his purpose in this world.
Perhaps in offering sacrifi ces to the G-d of Yitzchak, Yaakov is struggling to fi nd his place in the continuation of the dream that will one day become the Jewish people.
Perhaps this was really Yaakov’s struggle. Yaakov desperately wants to go down to Egypt to once again see his son Yosef. But he stops in Be’er Sheva. Is this, in the end, about Yaakov? Is this what I am meant to be doing? Sometimes you stop and ask yourself: why am I really here? Is this what I am meant to be doing in this world? Often, the answer is not so simple. You can’t look it up or ‘ask the Rabbi.’ You have to ask yourself: where am I, really?
Perhaps this is why Yaakov is praying to the G-d of Yitzchak. Yitzchak, in the grip of famine, thinks to follow in the path of his father Abraham, and go down to Egypt. But
G-d tells Yitzchak not to go. (Genesis 26:2). Yitzchak never leaves the land of Israel.
So is Yaakov ready to go back into exile? It seems as if everything he has been building is now about to be undone. How will living in Egypt, the center of paganism in the ancient world, affect the children of Israel?
What this conversation represents, per-haps, is the struggle we sometimes have to ‘do the right thing.’ The willingness to do whatever it is G-d wants of me, if only I could fi gure out what that is.
The Vilna Gaon suggests (in his Even She-leimah) that the struggle is trying to be sure that whatever I end up doing, is really for the right reasons. Ultimately, if I make the wrong decision, but I do it for the right reasons, it will end up being all right. But if I make the right decision, objectively, but for the wrong reasons, it will always end up wrong.
Four months later, having decided to go back and do tank offi cer’s school all over again, the right day fi nally came. And there is one moment that will stand out forever in my mind. It wasn’t the berets thrown in the air, nor the impressive tank parade, or even the special salute from the Chief of Staff of the Israeli Army.
It was a moment with Yuval Azulai. Yu-val was a legend in the Offi cer’s corps. He was brilliant, and knew everything there was to know about tanks and armored warfare. Laser technology, thermal imagery, shell tra-jectories, enemy weaponry; he knew it all. Which was why he was one of the Offi cers responsible for training Offi cers in the Ar-mored Corps.
A week into my repeat course he found me, late at night, working on my tank. He had heard I had come back, and wanted to
know what had made me do it all over again.I thought Israel needed motivated offi cers, and I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering if I should have tried. From that day, he took me under his wing. When ev-eryone else was fi nally getting their two or three hours sleep, he would pull me aside and quiz me brutally on everything we were learning. He demanded excellence, and told me he would make sure I didn’t fail again. Hetook it as his personal mission to ensure that I became what an Offi cer was meant to be. He absolutely terrorized me, and I dreaded his surprise arrivals. One day he took overour platoon’s maneuvers so he could person-ally oversee mine and rip it to shreds. By thetime our fi nal exams arrived at the end of thecourse, they were a breeze.
And on the day of the ceremony, fresh bars on my shoulders, before the traditional slam on the back, he asked me:
“So, how does it feel now that you’ve be-come an Offi cer?”
I smiled: ‘It feels pretty darned good.’ And he looked at me and said: “You don’t
get it at all. You aren’t even close to becom-ing an Offi cer. Being an offi cer isn’t about the training. That’s just the introduction. The real question is, can you become the man whose men will follow him anywhere, evenup a hill under fi re?”
And he walked away. And I fi nally got it.Yaakov wanted to be sure that it wasn’t
about Yaakov. That is our greatest challenge:To be sure, in all that we do, that it isn’t about me, but about everyone else, which is really why we are all here to begin with.
May Hashem bless us all, as individuals, and as a people, to experience the joy of dis-covering what we are really meant to do in this world, and to fi nd the strength to go and do it, for all the right reasons.
Shabbat Shalom,Rav Binny Freedman
FROM THE HEART OF JERUSALEM
Rabbi Binny Freedman
Finding your destinyD
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