Copyright © 2013-2016 by Impact Coaching AcademyCoach... · 2015-10-28 · However, the ICF is not the only coaching organization, there are many! There are some that are also schools,

Copyright © 2013-2016 by Impact Coaching Academy

ISBN: 978-0-9920365-2-2

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording,

or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Impact Coaching Academy Professional Life Coach Foundations Training Course

© 2013-2016 Impact Coaching Academy. All Rights Reserved. www.ImpactCoachingAcademy.com

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CONTENTS INTRODUCTION & WELCOME FROM YOUR INSTRUCTOR ........................................................ 3 PROFESSIONAL LIFE COACH PROGRAM - FOUNDATIONS ........................................................ 4 ETHICS AND CONDUCT - .................................................................................................................... 4

Topic #1 – The Right Stuff – Ethics And Conduct ............................................................................. 4 THE ICF STANDARDS OF ETHICAL CONDUCT ............................................................................ 11 CONFLICTS & CONFIDENTIALITY .................................................................................................. 16 PROFESSIONAL CONDUCT ............................................................................................................... 23

Summary ............................................................................................................................................. 26 AGREEMENTS AND INTAKE ............................................................................................................ 27 PROFESSIONAL COACHING CORE COMPETENCIES .................................................................. 34

Topic #2 – Getting Started - Setting, (and re-setting), the Foundation ............................................... 34 Ongoing Attention - ............................................................................................................................ 38 Topic #3 – The Speed, and Need of Trust – Establishing Trust and Intimacy with .......................... 40 the Client ............................................................................................................................................. 40 Topic #4 – It's All in the Questions - Powerful Questioning .............................................................. 46 Topic #5 - Fake it Till You Make It? No! - Coaching Presence .......................................................... 48 Topic #6 – Did You Hear That?– Active Listening ............................................................................. 53 Topic #7 – Say it, Own it, and Wrap it Carefully - Direct Communication....................................... 58 Topic #8 – Let there be Light! - Creating Awareness ......................................................................... 63 Topic #9 – The Action Trifecta, Part One - Designing Actions .......................................................... 67 Topic #10 – The Action Trifecta, Part One - Designing Actions ....................................................... 71 Topic #11 – The Review and Debrief – The Core Competencies ....................................................... 77 Topics #12 - #17 – Coaching Practice and Demonstration ................................................................. 79 Topics #18 – Review of Professional Coaching Program ................................................................... 79 Next Steps ........................................................................................................................................... 80

APPENDIX A ......................................................................................................................................... 81 ICF CODE OF ETHICS ..................................................................................................................... 81

APPENDIX B ......................................................................................................................................... 84 Intake Resources ................................................................................................................................. 84 COACHING AGREEMENT – SAMPLE .......................................................................................... 85 COACHING WELCOME AND INTAKE PACKET - SAMPLE ...................................................... 86

APPENDIX C THE ICF PLEDGE OF ETHICS ............................................................................................................ 90 APPENDIX D. ........................................................................................................................................ 91 Coaching Practice – Competency Score Card ........................................................................................ 91



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INTRODUCTION & WELCOME FROM YOUR INSTRUCTOR

Welcome to part one of your coach training program, Coaching Ethics and Conduct! This content and training will help you build the stable and clear foundation for all that you do as a professional coach. Now, I know ethics and conduct is not the most inspiring content around. It's true, it can be a bit dull, but don't yawn just yet. You have my promise, as your instructor, to do everything in my power to make our journey through these essential guidelines and concepts enjoyable, relevant and very user-friendly!

So, what's included? Behind every coaching session, task one is to remain within the ethical and established conduct guidelines, first and foremost. After that, your style and technique can be critiqued, celebrated and acknowledged

But this goes beyond what can be demonstrated or measured in a session. It includes conduct at large, storage, privacy, conflicts of interest, research, and much more!

While this course, which is part of ICA’s Professional Life Coach training program, adheres to the ICF policies and endorses their rigor and value, there is something else to be considered - YOU. Learning the established standards of your profession is great, but what about YOUR standards? What about your ethics? In certain circumstances and in many every day decisions too, you will be engaging YOUR ethics in concert with what you'll be learning in this course. That's why we'll be examining how the industry standards and your personal standards, work together in harmony to help you face any professional coaching situation with grace.

Then, we move into the Core Coaching Competencies. The Core Competencies are widely regarded as the industry standard for professional coaching excellence. They beautifully spell out the key coaching skills that all coaches, new and veteran, specialists and generalists alike, should use as the benchmark for their professional coaching development.

While being able to measure and evaluate coaching skills against a set of standards is an invaluable way to track your progress, there is much more to it. When you develop the practice, and skill, of being able to deconstruct a coaching session, you will also demystify the coaching process. Far too often coaches struggle to describe what they do with their clients. However, when you adopt the language of the Core Competencies AND develop the skill to demonstrate them too – it's a one-two punch! You'll experience an increased coaching power, plus a new way to speak about the valuable services you provide.

Best to you always,

Terri Hase, PCC, MMC

Impact Coaching Academy Professional Life Coach Foundations Training Course © 2013-2016 Impact Coaching Academy. All Rights Reserved.

www.ImpactCoachingAcademy.com 3

PROFESSIONAL LIFE COACH PROGRAM - FOUNDATIONS

Bring any, and all, questions to class, or share them on the discussion forum, or email your instructor directly. Also, be prepared to share your responses to any of the specific questions in the workbook. These questions are largely for your own self study, but are also to help fuel class and buddy coaching conversations. Throughout the course of our program you will be experiencing many different types of interaction and learning. You will be listening to lecture, engaging in Q&A, coaching and being coached, both in class and with your fellow students in break-out sessions. The instructor will observe your coaching sessions and provide you with both verbal and written evaluations, to foster your professional development as a coach. This is a full immersion experience!

ETHICS AND CONDUCT -

Topic #1 – The Right Stuff – Ethics and Conduct

First, Who's Who? Before we begin this conversation, it's wise to explore the source of the definitions we're going to be referencing and discuss a few widely used acronyms within the coaching industry. Within the coaching industry there is a lot of confusion about certification, and the roles of the various organizations, boards and schools involved. Let's begin by clearing up some of this confusion, because if you've got questions, you're not alone. And believe me, when you've got uncertainty about the big players and roles within your professional world, this is a big road-block to feeling confident! Within our industry there are coaching schools, facilitator programs, universities with coaching programs, thought leaders with trainings, and much more. Example: Impact Coaching Academy is a coach training organization. It has Coaching Certificate programs, niche training programs, and full Certified Coach offerings. Impact Coaching Academy, (ICA), has committed to adhere to, and support the guidelines and specifications of an organization called: The International Coach Federation. The ICF is not a school. It's an organization, an accrediting body within our industry. It is recognized worldwide as the preeminent and leading coaching association. It’s the ICF Ethics and Conduct statement that we will be



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using as the foundation of this topic, the full course, and that you'll be asked to adhere to as a Professional Coach. The ICF was founded in 1995; its core purpose is to advance the art, science, and practice of professional coaching. As the leading global coaching organization, the ICF is working toward this goal by setting high standards, providing independent certification, and building a worldwide network of credentialed coaches. The Code of Ethics, as well as the Core Competencies we'll be learning in a future course, were collaboratively created by some of the leading coaches in the world at the ICF. Thousands of coaches, and coaches in training, have dedicated themselves to upholding the standards we'll be discussing, and our profession is stronger for it. So, as we move forward in this course, please know that a lot of effort and thought have gone into what we're going to be covering. However, the ICF is not the only coaching organization, there are many! There are some that are also schools, some that offer their own brand of certification, and some that don't. All this to say, there are many options available for you to partner with. Each professional coach makes their own decision about what certifications, schools, and organizations they want to partner with. It's something that is a personal, entrepreneurial decision. It is not a decision that is somehow mandated by the coaching industry. You've chosen to partner with Impact Coaching Academy for this leg of your journey – THANK YOU! We hope you'll let us continue to share in your success for a long time to come! The all important question: “What IS Coaching?” To answer the question of “What is Coaching”, we have to step into the past a bit to understand just how troublesome this question has been for many coaches. In the early days of coaching, a lot of coaches described what they did by describing what they didn't do. The answer often sounded something like this, “Well, it's not therapy, and it's not consulting, we don't diagnose anything, and we aren't really like sports coaches...” - ICK! What a crazy thing we were doing! Really, how much sense does it make to try and explain the amazing thing you do, by making sure you explain what you don't do – madness! Not only did it not answer the question, but it basically caused a swift glassy-eyed-gaze effect on the other party. So why would anyone say such a silly thing? Two top reasons come up right away: First, no one had a real understanding of what coaching was, nor a practiced and comfortable way of talking about it – AND – Second, we're such a polite and considerate lot, (much to our disempowerment in this case), we just wanted to make sure we weren't stepping on anyone's toes in those valuable professions, or misleading anyone that we are 'just like them', so to speak. For YEARS I heard coaches, new and veteran, stumble and stammer when asked, “So, what's a Coach, and what do you do?” In fact, I still hear it from time to time. So, what is this coaching 'thing'? Let's refer to the ICF's own words from their website. They have clearly spelled out not only a definition of coaching, but also detailed distinctions about the definition of a coaching relationship, and the added nuances applied to an ICF Professional Coach.



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Coaching Is Coaching is a partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. Language is critical, both its understanding and its application. So, let's take the key parts of this definition and review their specific, and powerful, nuances. For decades Webster's Dictionary has provided us the final word, when it comes to 'words'. Let's turn to it now to expand our thinking and conversation about the definition of coaching. We will start with the key words in ICF definition: partnering / clients / thought-provoking / creative / process / inspires / maximize / personal / professional / potential. Exploring each of their definitions, or synonyms and antonyms, will help us anchor their meaning in our future coaching interactions and conversations. As each is discussed, make note of the distinctions or expansions that inspire, challenge or support your thinking. Partnering: To join or associate with another as partner.

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Clients: A person who engages the professional advice or services of another.

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Thought-Provoking: Synonyms: charged, exciting, inciting, instigating, edgy, piquing, provocative, stimulating. Antonyms: non-inflammatory.

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Creative: Synonyms: clever, imaginative, ingenious, innovative, inventive, original, originative. Antonyms: uncreative, unimaginative, uninventive, and unoriginal

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Process: Synonyms: course, operation, procedure. __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Inspires: To exert an animating or enlivening influence on - Synonyms: buoy (up), cheer (up), embolden, hearten, encourage, inspirit, steel. Antonyms: daunt, discourage, dishearten, dispirit.

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Maximize: To find the most value in; to increase or make as great as possible; to assign the highest possible importance to.

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Personal: Relating to the person or body, or one’s individual feelings, thoughts, beliefs or experiences. Synonyms: own, special, private, individual, particular. Antonyms: impersonal.

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Professional: Participating for gain or livelihood in an activity or field of endeavor; of, relating to, or characteristic of a profession.

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Potential: Existing in possibility: capable of development into actuality - Synonyms: implicit, possible. Antonyms: actual, existent, and factual.

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Deeper Distinctions From The ICF

Distinctions are valuable for developing and expanding your understanding of this definition. Consider this from the ICF website:

How is coaching distinct from other service professions? Professional coaching is a distinct service, which focuses on an individual's life as it relates to goal setting, outcome creation and personal change management. In an effort to understand what a coach is, it can be helpful to distinguish coaching from other professions that provide personal or organizational support.

• Therapy: Coaching can be distinguished from therapy in a number of ways. First, coaching is a profession that supports personal and professional growth and development based on individual-initiated change in pursuit of specific actionable outcomes. These outcomes are linked to personal or professional success. Coaching is forward moving and future focused. Therapy, on the other hand, deals with healing pain, dysfunction and conflict within an individual or a relationship between two or more individuals. The focus is often on resolving difficulties arising from the past which hamper an individual's emotional functioning in the present, improving overall psychological functioning, and dealing with present life and work circumstances in more emotionally healthy ways. Therapy outcomes often include improved emotional/feeling states. While positive feelings/emotions may be a natural outcome of coaching, the primary focus is on creating actionable strategies for achieving specific goals in one's work or personal life. The emphasis in a coaching relationship is on action, accountability and follow-through.



• Consulting: Consultants may be retained by individuals or organizations for the purpose of accessing specialized expertise. While consulting approaches vary widely, there is often an assumption that the consultant diagnoses problems and prescribes and sometimes implements solutions. In general, the assumption with coaching is that individuals or teams are capable of generating their own solutions, with the coach supplying supportive, discovery-based approaches and frameworks.

• Mentoring: Mentoring, which can be thought of as guiding from one's own experience or sharing of experience in a specific area of industry or career development, is sometimes confused with coaching. Although some coaches provide mentoring as part of their coaching, such as in mentor coaching new coaches, coaches are not typically mentors to those they coach.

• Training: Training programs are based on the acquisition of certain learning objectives as set out by the trainer or instructor. Though objectives are clarified in the coaching process, they are set by the individual or team being coached with guidance provided by the coach. Training also assumes a linear learning path which coincides with an established curriculum. Coaching is less linear without a set curriculum plan.

• Athletic Development: Though sports metaphors are often used, professional coaching is different from the traditional sports coach. The athletic coach is often seen as an expert who guides and directs the behavior of individuals or teams based on his or her greater experience and knowledge. Professional coaches possess these qualities, but it is the experience and knowledge of the individual or team that determines the direction. Additionally, professional coaching, unlike athletic development, does not focus on behaviors that are being executed poorly or incorrectly. Instead, the focus is on identifying opportunity for development based on individual strengths and capabilities.

A Coaching Relationship is: A Professional Coaching Relationship is defined by the ICF as: “A professional coaching relationship exists when coaching includes a business agreement or contract that defines the responsibilities of each party.” This added clarification is important because it speaks to the very nature of the profession of coaching...well...as a profession. Coaching is what happens in the session, and during interactions with the client. The coaching relationship is the contracted business agreement you enter into. It's the BUSINESS of coaching.

Above and Beyond For The ICF Coach :

An ICF Professional Coach enjoys the benefits of being associated with this powerful organization, but



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also bears added responsibility too: “An ICF Professional coach also agrees to practice the ICF Core Competencies and pledges accountability to the ICF Code of Ethics.

This part is pretty straight forward, but it also acknowledges something important to point out. A coach must be a successfully practicing coach, before they ever become a recognized ICF Professional Coach. In other words, (from earlier in this workbook), the raw definition of coaching and the professional coaching relationship apply to all coaches who honor these definitions by word, deed and intention. This is regardless of your current certification status, or even if you ever decide to become certified.

I mention this because this is one of the stickiest of the common sticky-places coaches get stuck. The coaching industry is, by design, a bit different than many other industries who extend a certification or license. In the auto insurance industry, you study, take the state exam and THEN, and only then, are you allowed to even 'speak' insurance with a customer. The coaching industry is different. You may complete classes or courses, and earn a certification or license from the school/company/trainer. That accomplishment allows you to bear a specific title, and most often, use a specific set of tools or processes, protected by intellectual property rights. The ICF designations are very different. You must complete accredited training, pass an exam AND log over 100+ hours of professional coaching, (remember the earlier definition of that relationship). Furthermore, of those 100+ hours of professional coaching, you must have worked with 8+ clients, and the majority of your coaching must be paid.

This means that the ICF designation is NOT DESIGNED to give you permission to coach, it's DESIGNED to honor you, and validate you, as a practicing and SUCCESSFUL COACH.

Bottom line – you are free to be a professional coach, (hopefully, on the road to your certification and accreditation), when you adopt these standards and engage in a professional coaching relationship. And that begins right now! Go further, Remove Any Illusion: Defining coaching is critical to your marketing, to your confidence, to your professionalism and to your success. But, so is defining what it isn't. Why? Because trying to assign 'other' things to the definition of coaching can make for some really massive road-blocks. Fortunately, once you know what something IS, it's pretty easy to test any lingering concerns or confusion, because once you know what is, what 'isn't' also becomes more clear. In this case, there is a freedom to be gained through this elimination. Cast off what you thought coaching was, what you worried it was, and any belief that doesn't serve your success! Q: Coaching ISN'T: (fill in your thoughts and capture those shared in class)

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Q: Take a moment and express for yourself. What does clarity in this area create for you? How was this valuable to you as a professional coach

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“Be professional and get proper training. However, know this, you'll never be 'done'. You never

get to declare you're finished. Therefore, don't study, and study, waiting to really coach when you're 'done', accredited or certified. Thinking this way will NOT serve you. In fact, the truth is

that it will delay your success AND accreditation.” - Terri Hase, Coach

THE ICF STANDARDS OF ETHICAL CONDUCT

Verbatim and Then Some

In accordance with the ICF standards, Impact Coaching Academy commits to reviewing and discussing the Standards of Ethical Conduct verbatim. Rest assured, this will be one of the only times throughout all of your training that you'll be read to extensively. There is however, a real value in taking the time to carefully detail each part of these essential standards, in this way. That said, you are not off the hook in the interaction department! You'll note throughout this part of the workbook that there are lots of questions interjected within the standards. We will be answering these questions in class, through our discussions and sharing. Extra space is also provided for note taking. The ICF Standards of Ethical Conduct Preamble: ICF Professional Coaches aspire to conduct themselves in a manner that reflects positively upon the coaching profession; are respectful of different approaches to coaching; and recognize that



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they are also bound by applicable laws and regulations.

Q: What laws and regulations might be involved? (Remember who makes laws) __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Q: Define for yourself some of the hallmarks of conducting yourself in a manner that reflects positively upon the coaching profession. __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Professional Conduct At Large

As a coach:

I will not knowingly make any public statement that is untrue or misleading about what I offer as a coach, or make false claims in any written documents relating to the coaching profession or my credentials or the ICF.

Example: “I'm a seasoned veteran” / “You will be free forever from your fears” / “Coaching is the only answer” Q: What are your concerns or questions about this aspect of the Code of Ethics? Is it something you're concerned about in any way? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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I will accurately identify my coaching qualifications, expertise, experience, certifications and ICF Credentials.



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Example: “I'm an LMNOP Certified Coach” / “I've coached many clients to success in this area”

Q: Name the coaching accredited designations as established by the ICF. Also list the designations you're aware of and/or wish to pursue from other possible sources. __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Q: What can you say cleanly, powerfully and truthfully about your experience? About what you might offer? Design a sentence or two that you feel great about and be prepared to share it with your classmates. __________________________________________________________________________________________

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I will recognize and honor the efforts and contributions of others and not misrepresent them as my own. I understand that violating this standard may leave me subject to legal remedy by a third party. Example: “I have a theory I call the Hierarchy of Needs” Q: What concerns do you have about the IP, (Intellectual Property), of others? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Q: How can you expand on someone else's idea cleanly? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Q: What thoughts or feelings do you have about using the IP, (legally) of others? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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I will, at all times, strive to recognize personal issues that may impair, conflict, or interfere with my coaching performance or my professional coaching relationships. Whenever the facts and circumstances necessitate, I will promptly seek professional assistance and determine the action to be taken, including whether it is appropriate to suspend or terminate my coaching relationship(s). Example: Your Biases / Unmet Needs / Fears / Commitments Q: Do you have a coach of your own? Name 3 things you're currently working on, or would work on, with your coach, (you won't be required to share this with the class) __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Q: Draw a distinction between personal issues and professional issues when it comes to the intent of

this standard.

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Q: Provide an example of a 'personal issue' that might actually be an ethical boundary. How would you communicate this to your prospective clients? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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I will conduct myself in accordance with the ICF Code of Ethics in all coach training, coach mentoring, and coach supervisory activities.

Notes:

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I will conduct and report research* with competence, honesty, and within recognized scientific standards and applicable subject guidelines. My research will be carried out with the necessary consent and approval of those involved, and with an approach that will protect participants from any potential harm. All research efforts will be performed in a manner that complies with all the applicable laws of the country in which the research is conducted. *More on research and the ICF can be seen here: http://coachfederation.org/research-education/research/ Q: In what ways can engaging in research advance your experience, credibility and network? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Q: Name one area of interest to you that might also be suitable for research. __________________________________________________________________________________________

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http://coachfederation.org/research-education/research/

I will maintain, store, and dispose of any records created during my coaching business in a manner that promotes confidentiality, security, and privacy, and complies with any applicable laws and agreements Example: Safe / Locked File Cabinet / Online Systems

Notes:

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I will use ICF member contact information (e-mail addresses, telephone numbers, etc.) only in the manner, and to the extent, authorized by the ICF.

Example: Emailing members of a SIG, (special interest group) The interesting thing about establishing a practice of honoring these ethical standards is that by doing so, you rarely have instance to really need to refer back to them. The proactive and conscious application of them in your paperwork, daily practices and language, help you run a clean operation that's well protected though still ready for most anything!

So, you'd think this was all you'd need – right? Nope. There's more. In our next session we're going to be adding the dimension of your own Ethics Code into the mix!

CONFLICTS & CONFIDENTIALITY

In this session we're going to explore the many subtle layers that contribute to a conflict of interest. We'll also be discussing your personal Code of Ethics, and how partnering your ethics with the ICF's code supports a clean coaching practice! Conflicts of Interest: The ICF details the conflicts of interest standards as follows: As a coach: I will seek to avoid conflicts of interest and potential conflicts of interest and openly disclose any such conflicts. I will offer to remove myself when such a conflict arises.



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It's important to pause for a moment and investigate what exactly a 'conflict of interest' is. Wikipedia provides the following: A conflict of interest (COI) occurs when an individual or organization is involved in multiple interests, one of which could possibly corrupt the motivation for an act in the other. A conflict of interest can only exist if a person or testimony is entrusted with some impartiality; a modicum of trust is necessary to create it. The presence of a conflict of interest is independent from the execution of impropriety. Therefore, a conflict of interest can be discovered and voluntarily defused before any corruption occurs.

Other key components of a conflict of interest include the inability to remain objective due to personal or professional repercussions, personal or professional interests attached to the outcomes of confidential transactions, etc. Q: Describe a possible conflict of interest that might occur for the following types of situations: A Coach who is taking a leadership role in their local community, and coaching the small business owners through tough economic times: __________________________________________________________________________________________

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A Coach who coaches families around end of life issues __________________________________________________________________________________________

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A Coach who recently published their first book __________________________________________________________________________________________

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A Relationship Coach who is coaching a couple to rescue their relationship __________________________________________________________________________________________

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I will disclose to my client and his or her sponsor all anticipated compensation from third parties that I may pay or receive for referrals of that client. Example: Affiliates / Direct Revenue / 'Goodies'

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I will only barter for services, goods or other non-monetary remuneration when it will not impair the coaching relationship __________________________________________________________________________________________

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I will not knowingly take any personal, professional, or monetary advantage or benefit of the coach-client relationship, except by a form of compensation as agreed in the agreement or contract.



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Q: What about referrals? How do you think they play into professional benefit? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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What about you? You, your ethics and the ICF standards. Try as you might, you have opinions, thoughts and beliefs that filter your daily actions. We all do. Even the most enlightened of us do, so relax, nothing’s wrong with this. However, it's pure folly to imagine that a Code of Ethics that doesn't include your own 'personal addendum' would be easy to sustain. Yes, you can agree to abide by the ethical guidelines that have been outlined so far. In fact, to be a graduate of this academy and go onto your ICF designation, it's a requirement. That said, nothing says you can't go above and beyond this foundational piece of work to help protect your integrity and professional standing in the face of the specific situations that you, personally because of who you are and what you believe, are likely to experience some 'charge' around. What in the world do I mean? Let me give you a few examples. 1) A Christian Coach who has strong convictions about couples not living together before marriage. 2) A Relationship Coach who discovers her client is being beaten, but the client declines to take any

action to stop it. 3) A Coach whose client doesn't want anything to change about her/his spouse’s marital infidelity, s/he

just wants to learn how to tolerate it better. 4) A Coach whose client wants a promotion more than anything and wants that to be the only focus of

his coaching. However, through the session work, the Coach learns that the client’s family is falling apart, his finances are in ruin, he's abusing drugs and is ignoring a glaring diagnosed health issue.

5) Your client reveals a strong racial bias that conflicts with your beliefs. It doesn't directly impact the topic of your 'sales coaching' program, except in the leadership of others in his organization.

What would you do? Anything? Do any of these circumstances push your buttons? The odds are, the answer is 'yes' to at least one of the above scenarios. This is where THE standards meet YOUR standards. There are several ways to incorporate your personal values and ethics into a standardized Code of Ethics. Recognizing what your strong beliefs are is the first step. This is perfect work for you and your very



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own coach! Engage in a values assessment and see what rises to the top for you. The odds are there will be a few strong beliefs attached to your top ten values. Explore these; will they interfere with your coaching relationships? Another practical way to identify any possible 'rough spots' is to imagine your way through the stages of a common situation your typical client might face. I'll explain this a bit more, but first, if you don't know who your typical client is yet, this is going to require some hypothetical thinking – that's ok. It's ok because even if you do have a clear idea about your 'target' client, this process is best re-done often. So, what you determine now is likely to change, and that's fine. Just keep asking yourself the questions, and let your 'ethics addendum' evolve as you and your coaching practice do. To imagine your way through a typical situation, begin with these questions: 1) What kind of issue/challenge/problem/desire/dream might someone come to me for coaching

about? Just begin with one idea. Even if more than one pops, pick just one and continue with the questions below. Then, repeat the process with the other topics that came up for you.

2) What is a common thought; experience or feeling that occurs at the onset, or beginning awareness of this situation?

3) What is a typical desired outcome that might be agreed upon? 4) What are some of the next key turning points that this client might face along the way? 5) What factors are likely to come into play during our coaching relationship? Now, take a look at what you've written. It might look like this.... Clients might come to me to revive their dream of becoming an artist. They are likely to feel yearning, maybe some sadness about time passed, maybe some fear or doubt about 'going for it'. They are likely to have to define what they want specifically, collaboratively develop an action plan, be held accountable, and evaluate their weekly results candidly. They might face artist's block, time and priority management issues. They might face fears of judgment. Key points might be getting started, finishing, connecting with agents, getting gallery shows, handling feedback, etc.

So, anything in there seem like it's going to challenge you? Maybe, maybe not. What if it were a bit more complex? What if your likely client might come to you about living a quality life with their AIDS diagnosis, or deciding on whether to join the Army - - - What about now?

The key thing in this exercise is to consider carefully the reality, and likelihood, of the clients you, (due to your actual circumstances), are likely to attract and encounter. Don't get yourself wrapped up in the minimally possible, start with the most likely first. Then, as you clarity and confidence expand, reach into the remote possibilities your mind might drift to.

In the end you may discover that you need to add some clauses to your Coaching Agreement to express your personal Code of Ethics.



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Q: What came up for you during this segment? Are there some circumstances you have concerns about? Some that you feel will require extra clarification to remain clean and professional? __________________________________________________________________________________________

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Confidentiality and Privacy:

As a Coach: I will maintain the strictest levels of confidentiality with all client and sponsor information. I will have a clear agreement or contract before releasing information to another person, unless required by law. Here is the challenge, how do you tell people about what you do without betraying the confidentiality of your clients? How much CAN you say, where is the line? Is it ok to say, “I have a client who is a banker...”, or no? Can you say you have a client who is facing re-election? Can you introduce a client you run into at the store to your wife as, “this is my client, Bob”?

Does your client have 'coach shame', or a need to remain totally anonymous? Or, do they love you and want to sign your praises to the skies? Your policy might be clear, but addressing privacy with each and every client is highly advisable. I will have a clear agreement upon how coaching information will be exchanged among coach, client, and sponsor.

This calls the professional coach to be consistent about their paperwork and policies. As I mentioned in the section above, whatever you and your client agree upon, get it into your agreement!

It's important to also speak here a little about 'sponsors'. The ICF brings this definition to us:

In order to clarify roles in the coaching relationship, it is often necessary to distinguish between the client and the sponsor. In most cases, the client and sponsor are the same person and therefore jointly referred to as the client. For purposes of identification, however, the International Coach Federation defines these roles as follows:



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• Client: The "client" is the person(s) being coached.

• Sponsor: The "sponsor" is the entity (including its representatives) paying for and/or arranging for coaching services to be provided. In all cases, coaching engagement contracts or agreements should clearly establish the rights, roles, and responsibilities for both the client and sponsor if they are not the same persons.

Sponsors come into play most when the coach has been hired in a corporate setting, or an internal business or organizational setting. The sponsor is often paying the coaching fees and the signatory on the coaching contract but you might never coach them. Drawing the line, both for the sake of clarity and ethical responsibility, is critical. Notes:

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When acting as a trainer of student coaches, I will clarify confidentiality policies with the students.

While it may be unlikely that you're training coaches anytime soon, it's valuable to remember to address the special nuances of training situations in writing. I will have associated coaches, and other persons whom I manage in service of my clients and their sponsors, in a paid or volunteer capacity, make clear agreements or contracts to adhere to the ICF Code of Ethics Part 2, Section 4: Confidentiality/Privacy standards and the entire ICF Code of Ethics to the extent applicable.

To support this, a complete and direct copy of the ICF Code of Ethics is included at the end of this workbook. Please print and save a copy for yourself.



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PROFESSIONAL CONDUCT

Professional Conduct with Clients : As a coach:

I will not knowingly mislead or make false claims about what my client or sponsor will receive from the coaching process or from me as the coach.

Q: What do you feel you can 'promise' in the way of results for your clients?

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I will not give my prospective clients or sponsors information or advice I know or believe to be misleading or false.

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I will have clear agreements or contracts with my clients and sponsor(s). I will honor all agreements or contracts made in the context of professional coaching relationships.

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I will carefully explain and strive to ensure that, prior to or at the initial meeting, my coaching client and sponsor(s) understand the nature of coaching, the nature and limits of confidentiality, financial arrangements, and any other terms of the coaching agreement or contract.

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I will be responsible for setting clear, appropriate, and culturally sensitive boundaries that govern any physical contact I may have with my clients or sponsors.

It's not just the physical boundaries you need to consider. If you’re coaching by phone, this won't even be an issue! However, your tone, choice of language, approach to the clients concerns and situations needs to include the same consideration. I'll share with you an example.

Client: Wants help determining what to do about Wife and Daughter in a disagreement.

Coach: Asks various questions about the possibility of letting them sort it out for themselves.

Cultural component: The client lives in a culture where it's the Father's responsibility to handle these kinds of family issues by his decision. To continue to ask about other solutions could be perceived as insensitive or judgmental. Even worse, inviting the client to entertain the benefits of changing this belief and adopting a new way of thinking, might be quite insulting.

Take into consideration the whole client, and that includes their cultural paradigms. I will not become sexually intimate with any of my current clients or sponsors.

Uh, enough said. Seriously, don't go there. In fact, don't go there with anyone who has been your client within the last 3 months. Not to mention, one of the least likely 'ideal' clients you'll ever find, is the one on the other side of your bed. Pardon the frankness here, but there is something about coaching intimate partners that can easily slip into the realm of conflict of interest. Coaching intimate partners is frequently a painful lesson waiting to be learned.

Note, there is a big distinction here too. Using coaching based communications together in your relationship is often a technique that can dramatically improve, or even rescue it from implosion. This is totally different than the aforementioned situation. I will respect the client's right to terminate the coaching relationship at any point during the process, subject to the provisions of the agreement or contract. I will be alert to indications that the client is no longer benefiting from our coaching relationship.

Yes, you will respect their right to quit even if they are only two sessions into your 6-month coaching agreement. While you can enforce the financial terms of the agreement, you can't force them to keep coaching with you, (nor would you want to). Keeping your eyes open with relation to the effectiveness of your coaching relationship is a matter of integrity and professional conduct. Obviously, it isn't good to keep taking a client’s money if they aren't getting benefit anymore. The reasons don't really matter as much as catching the situation and



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calling it out to your client. The good news is, there are a few great techniques to rekindle a lagging coaching relationship as a result of this awareness and conversation with your client. We'll cover those in a future class! I will encourage the client, or sponsor, to make a change if I believe the client or sponsor would be better served by another coach or by another resource.

Many coaches find that their buttons get pushed by this concept, and by this in action too. Whether it's a sense of failure, an underlying belief in scarcity, or something else all together, making referrals can be a bit of a sticky point for many coaches. The truth is, making a referral is one of the most professional things you can do as a coach. Not only does it demonstrate your commitment to their 'best care', but it indicates that you have a network and resources lined up behind you! I will suggest my client seek the services of other professionals when deemed necessary or appropriate.

This is another area a lot of coaches feel uneasy about. The concern comes not so much around accepting the need to make the referral. The concern comes around the idea of possibly offending the client. There are also questions and doubt about 'when', 'how' and 'how will I be sure'.

Q: What signs/circumstances would you look for that might indicate a referral is necessary

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Q: How would you refer a client to an outside professional? Write out what you might say.

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Summary Awareness is the key to many things, and this is no different. Meeting the Ethical and Professional standards, as set out by the ICF and supported by ICA, is often accomplished by simply having the awareness of what these standards are. So, you're in good shape at this point! And, it's through awareness that we are able to see the opportunity, or necessity, to take necessary actions to keep us there! While these standards are clear, and very comprehensive, we've also learned about the YOU factor in how you add to them to support your unique way of being in the world. Much of what we've covered so far can be additionally addressed by how you write and use your coaching agreement. In fact, your coaching agreement can be such a powerful support partner in the area of conduct and ethics, that it's almost amazing!



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AGREEMENTS AND INTAKE

A good 'contract' is just part of the equation:

The importance of a good coaching agreement cannot be understated. But it goes so much further than the 'contract' that specifies the payment and session meeting arrangements. You can create a client manual, a participation agreement, a “how to be a great client” handout, and much more. It's up to you! There is no 'standard' agreement in the coaching industry, for obvious reasons. We just covered the importance of customizing your agreements to include specifics that are relevant to your clients, sponsors and coaching opportunities. It makes sense then that you establish a base agreement and get in the habit of reviewing it before handing it to each client, and review it with each client too.

In addition to the obvious benefits of having a good coaching agreement, there are a few not so obvious ones that are, frankly, just wonderful! Some coaches have resistance, (or even a flat out queasy feeling), about discussing some things with clients. Your agreement provides you an amazing opportunity to relieve a lot of the pressure in this area. How? It's called outsourcing your communication. You don't need an assistant to have a proxy on stand-by! Your agreement can do a lot of the communicating for you, or at the very least, open the door to important conversations.

What do I mean? Here is an example: Imagine feeling 'funny' about asking for payments. For many, that's not too hard to imagine. Now, imagine if your agreement clearly states your fees, terms of payment and policies regarding the financial commitment. By including all the details, especially those about how to automate the payment system, and how failure to pay on time will hurt the coaching process, you've communicated what you needed, but didn't have to personally muddle through it with your tongue tied in knots!

Of course, you're going to confirm the details of the agreement and go over it with the new client, but you've already introduced your practices and ideas to them so now, instead of a brand new conversation, you're merely responding to questions and confirming the arrangements. In time you are likely to discover that your hesitation or resistance resolves itself and you have no problem communicating with your clients about almost everything!

Build your agreement:

In the appendix you'll find a sample coaching agreement and intake/welcome packet. It is merely a sample. Review it carefully. Make note of what you like, or don't. Then, modeling what you like, and removing /editing what you may not be inspired by, create your own coaching agreement. If by chance you already have one that you're using, GREAT! See if you feel compelled to modify it. You have permission to copy it exactly, or modify the sample in anyway that suits you. You're welcome to make



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it your own, or disregard it totally. HOMEWORK: However, no matter what your decision, you do need to send in your coaching agreement to your instructor and buddy before next class session. Beyond the Agreement: Many coaches also have a complete intake process they use along with their comprehensive agreement. It supports them in selecting the best clients for them, in making sure they are the best coaches for their prospective clients, ensuring their policies are clear and enforceable, and much more. That intake process can be part of a method, involve some kind of assessment, or simply be a particular type of processing, or on-boarding. What you decide upon now is likely to change with time, to evolve. What you choose to do, or not do, is a entrepreneurial decision and is not derived from some coaching standardized norm.

So, how do you create an intake process that supports you in your coaching practice? You begin by being curious, move on to being resourceful and land on being willing to experiment. The first step in creating your intake system is to be clear about what's important to you to know, and to communicate. While we've discussed numerous things you might want to communicate, we've not yet mentioned much about what you might want to ask. Amazing! Especially since 'asking' is what we coaches do the most in the practice of our craft! So, now you get to do some asking.

Several key life areas are important to explore before concluding a good coaching relationship is likely. It's like testing the soil content and weather zone specifications before planting your garden. Oranges don't grow where there is a lot of snow and ice. Coaching relationships don't work when there are too many mitigating factors – like hostile soil.

Here is the list of the most important areas of your client’s life to investigate before signing on the dotted line:

Finances – Are they stable, abundant, or in crisis? One condition over another may not be a determining factor, but it will play a major role is sustainability, coaching focus, options the client may access and more.

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Commitments – Who or what gets their time? How many different priorities are holding their attention? This is important to establish how much time the client has to play with, get a sense for the types of priorities they hold, and the kinds of activities they are engaged in. The latter can be a very valuable connection to critical resources, or it could be a total drain. Important to know!



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Health – This is essential in determining if there are limitations, blind spots or greatly untapped resources lying within our prospect. It's about their relationship with their body, but it's also about how much energy they have. Energy levels, physical bandwidth, play a big role in the design and sustainability of any strategy you might create together.

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Relationships – Do they have them? How many and what kind? Believe it or not, it does make a difference if a client is single vs. married, has children vs. doesn't. It doesn't matter with regard to their potential so much, but it does matter in the context of their support structures. Much like the medical community considers a patient’s relational support systems when considering their course of treatment, you will want a snapshot of the key people in their lives.

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Attitudes – While a PMA, (Positive Mental Attitude), can go a long way, it barely scratches the surface of what I'm referencing here. Are they positive, upbeat, and happy? Are they down, hopeless, or resigned? Their current state might be the thing you coach, before you get to the thing they came to you for in the first place.

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Experience and Skills – I chuckle when I catch myself speaking to a client and we design a strategy. Then, suddenly this sentence spills out of their mouth - “You know, I used to do this years ago, so this



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will be easy”. I laugh. It's another reminder I hadn't explored their past experiences and skills enough to uncover this buried talent. Your clients are rich with experience, talent and skill. Things they have forgotten or dismiss could be exactly the things they need to succeed now.

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Desired Outcomes – As a coach you have to be able to determine if the client’s desired outcome is one with which you feel comfortable setting up an agreement. Now, this can sound judgmental.... and to some degree, it is. Not in the sense of, “you can/can't do this”, per se. More importantly, does the objective feel in alignment, and if not, call that out for discussion.

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For example: Your client wants to publish a book. Sounds reasonable, (if you coach that kind of thing). But, then the client shares that they want the book done in a weekend, and it must be a best seller for them to feel successful. Hmmmm. Could they complete their book in a weekend? Sure. Is it likely? No. Would it require an amazing commitment, technique, energy reserve and environment? Yep. Do they seem to have that at the ready? Maybe, maybe not. Then there is the expectation of 'best seller'

The point I'm making is this. Dreaming big and then planning in baby steps, (to big leaps), is a viable strategy. Counting on a full out, super human attack and a lightning-strike kind of win...not so viable. Not impossible, just not 'normal'. As coaches, we often coach our clients into possibility. Sometimes, we also have to coach them back into the realm of sustainable or more realistic. We sign on to support success, not to set the client up for failure. Clarity and perspective around the desired outcome is essential in determining what kind of experience you're signing on to coach.

While this list is pretty comprehensive, it's not nearly representative of everything you might want some insight into. You might want to know about their learning style, their personality and temperament type, their astrological sign, their strengths and more. What YOU want to know is always going to be unique to your own style, your experience with various clients and life situations. Q: Think carefully, what do you want to know before starting a new coaching relationship? Capture your thoughts here:



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Intake Assessments: What if you prefer an assessment, or other intake tool, from an outside source? Fine! There are MANY assessments, quizzes, systems and resources available in the realm of personal development. From the Keirsey-Bates 'Temperament Sorter', to Buckingham and Clifton's, 'Now Discover Your Strengths'. The possibilities are endless! Once you have determined for yourself what you want to know, it's time to determine if there is a resource to help you gather the information, or will you be best served by creating something of your own? Some coaches, for example, send their new clients the book 'Now Discover Your Strengths' and consider it required homework. Others require it as pre-coaching work, and charge a separate fee for a debrief session before a coaching agreement can even be considered.

You don't have to re-invent the wheel to capture the insight you want, and can even gain some credibility by using a well-established assessment or tool. Just know that the variety and depth of options available are very impressive. Then again, your 'big idea' might be the next 'Strengths Finder'!

Q: What assessments or evaluations are you aware of? Any you might consider as part of your intake process?

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Let's do a live demonstration: I'll conduct a brief intake / exploratory session and then we'll collectively share a debrief of what you heard. It will be your time to ask questions and share your thoughts. Use the following space to capture your thoughts as you listen:

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Q: What's your main take away from the demonstration? Something you'd incorporate or something you never thought of? Something you know you'd feel uneasy about or avoid?

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As we take this Pledge:

As we come to the conclusion of this Coaching Ethics and Conduct segment of this course, it's time for some reflection, and to take a moment to declare boldly how we go forward!

The globally accepted Code of Ethics, which the ICF has provided, is an invaluable tool for every coach. Being clear and comfortable in your understanding of the Code of Ethics, as well as the definition of coaching, is one of the hallmarks of a dedicated professional. Committing to this Code is encouraged for all coaches and required by those seeking certification and accreditation with this organization (ICA), and with the ICF.



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By embracing and incorporating your own personal Ethics Addendum, you've added a deeper connection to these valuable standards. You've taken the time to make them personal and that will go a long way to keeping them alive and present in your career. It's also prepared you to handle many possible, and most of the likely challenges you may encounter. So, it's an important step to include into this training, an opportunity to actually take the pledge and make the commitment real for yourself! Details about this, and the actual ICF Pledge copy below. The Next Steps and HOMEWORK:

As we end today's session, and in so doing, complete this segment of the course, you will have a few assignments to turn in.

• At the conclusion of class, please print, sign and send back to our offices your copy of the

ICF pledge, (hard mail, fax, or scan and email). We will be adding it to your student file. • Create your basic coaching agreement and intake packet. Send it to your buddy, and to your

instructor for feedback. Complete this within the week. • Secure some practice clients (details in class)



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PROFESSIONAL COACHING CORE COMPETENCIES

Topic #2 – Getting Started - Setting, (and re-setting), the Foundation Part 1: Drawing Distinctions Can you separate an egg yoke from its white? It's not a trick question, either you can or you can't. Can you run, drive a car, or balance a check book? These are all skills, and either you can accomplish them, or not. However, while each of these is essential to becoming a great chef, marathoner, celebrated writer or financial wizard, the ability to do these actions alone won't carry you there on their basic individual accomplishment alone. Rising to the top of any pursuit is a combination of solid basic skills, powerful techniques and lots of practice! The skills, in and of themselves, are static. The demonstration of them on a consistent basis, however, is blend of art and rote activity. It's a reasonable expectation to say, that as a student, you will understand the Core Competencies before this course is over. However, it's my intent that you more than understand them. I want you to rise to the level where you can truly shine while using them. My desire is to see your understanding and application, blend together to become the beginning stages of your artistry. Besides, understanding the Core Competencies isn't enough! As in construction, how you build your foundation is critical to how solid your building will be, and how high you can build it! Too often coaches try and rush through the basics. It's a BIG mistake! Sometimes it's because they can seem deceptively simple, and other times it's because they just want to get to some tried-and-true methods or processes they can begin using. There are lots of reasons behind this urgency, and we'll discuss a few before we're through. Let's address the first aspect now – “but they seem so simple!” It's funny how often we operate from the place of, “doesn't everyone know that?” The “basics” often get thrown into that category. I challenge you to consider this...everyone knows how to talk, but how many know how to really communicate? Most people know how to operate a car, but how many great drivers do you know? Most people know what love feels like, but how many people make great romantic partners? Seeing this curriculum as 'just' basic, or failing to see the Core Competencies as anything but a deep and powerful foundation for everything you do as a coach, is a critical mistake. One, I'm not going to let you make. In this course we're going to make sure you are SOLID at the basics. In fact, by becoming truly great in this area, it not only elevates you as a coach, but positions you to truly become a coaching artist.



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Part 2: What's it really mean? As earlier mentioned, the basis for our exploration and training are the ICF Core Competencies. I always appreciate the nuances the nature of the language can play. This is no different. Look at the raw language – Core Competencies. A brief look at this language is insightful in helping us to land on a common expectation when the words are used. Core: a central, and often foundational part, usually distinct from the enveloping part by a difference in nature. Competency: the quality of being competent; adequacy; possession of required skill, knowledge, qualification, or capacity. Q: Define for yourself, what does it mean to be competent? What does it mean to be competent as a coach? As a business person? As a Student?

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Part 3: The first demonstration is one of understanding and compliance We discussed the ICF Ethics and Conduct code thoroughly in the earlier portion of the program, and this is where we apply all we learned. During this course we're going to be listening to one another demonstrate coaching skills through a series of exercises and coaching mini-sessions. While much of our conversation will be on the demonstration of the skills and competencies themselves, we'll always be on the look-out for emerging ethics and conduct issues too. The demonstration of the Code of Ethics is often seen as an absence of evidence as much as it is a presence of evidence. Consider this, as detailed from the ICF Core Competencies, to refresh our memories and deepen our understanding - Core Competency #1 - Meeting Ethical Guidelines and Professional Standards - Understanding of coaching ethics and standards and ability to apply them appropriately in all coaching situations.

Understands and exhibits in own behaviors the ICF Standards of Conduct (see list, Part III of ICF Code of Ethics).

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Understands and follows all ICF Ethical Guidelines (see list).

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Clearly communicates the distinctions between coaching, consulting, psychotherapy and other support professions.

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Refers client to another support professional as needed, knowing when this is needed and the available resources.

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Q: What does it mean to you when I say the Code of Ethics is about both an 'absence of' and 'presence of' state?

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Part 4: I agree to agree, and agree often Before you begin a coaching relationship, again at the start of every coaching session, and all throughout the coaching session, you are crafting, confirming and reconfirming your coaching agreement. Too often coaches believe that the establishment of the coaching agreement is something written in stone, at the onset, and fixed in place for the duration of the relationship. NOT so! Sure, some aspects would fit into this practice, especially those related to your own professional and personal boundaries. The rest, however, needs to be quite flexible. Here are the specifications crafted by the ICF: let's begin there. Core Competency #2 - Establishing the Coaching Agreement- Ability to understand what is required in the specific coaching interaction and to come to agreement with the prospective and new client about the coaching process and relationship.

• Understands and effectively discusses with the client the guidelines and specific parameters of the coaching relationship (e.g., logistics, fees, scheduling, inclusion of others if appropriate).

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• Reaches agreement about what is appropriate in the relationship and what is not, what is and is

not being offered, and about the client's and coach's responsibilities.

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• Determines whether there is an effective match between his/her coaching method and the needs

of the prospective client.

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Ongoing Attention - Honoring these standards is expected, but there is more to consider. There are deeper and broader applications to take advantage of. To truly understand why, and begin to practice how, we first need to establish what an agreement is, beyond the definition we've already shared. It is the document you share with them as you enter the coaching relationship? Yes. But, that's only one part. Each coaching session provides a new opportunity to bring your coaching agreement into the conversation. Not because they didn't 'get it' the first time, not because you need to hammer them with the rules, but because their details and priorities change. Sometimes they can change between sessions, sometimes they can change in the middle of a session. Being tuned into the value of abundant opportunities to 'talk agreement' will make doing so rewarding and easy! A few simple aspects to agree upon are the duration of the session, permission to record it, permission to begin it, and any special considerations relating to this specific session. There is a lot of benefit to this process. I'll share with you an example and we'll discuss more fully in class. Example: “Today we'll be spending about 30 minutes together and I'll be recording this session for my own post-session review. Are you ready to begin?” This is a very natural and easy way to begin a coaching session. It helps establish the time (thus drawing attention to the value of each minute), reminds your client that you're recording the session, (which captures their permission on the audio, for your protection), and clearly establishes the shift from conversation to coaching. Two additional aspects of your session-by-session agreement are, the topic of the coaching session and the desired outcome. It seems to make sense that if they hired you to accomplish their dream of becoming an amazing Mom, that would be the topic – right? Not always. In fact, a lot of important things can come up that might derail that conversation. It's also true a lot of unnecessary things can come up to. Being in the habit of clarifying direction and topic allows you many opportunities to speak to both. When your client’s life is touched by the death of a loved one, for example, it makes perfect sense to spend a couple sessions processing the feelings, logistics and such. There is often value in agreeing to set aide earlier agendas, or modify earlier agendas, and focus a couple sessions on their self care, (etc). In the pursuit of being client-centric, letting your clients dictate what's important in their lives, and responsively changing agendas is common. Be aware though, frequently changing agendas, is often the sign of a whole different thing. Rapidly changing agendas can indicate avoidance, resistance, overwhelm, and confusion. It can also pin-point patterns of distraction, procrastination and more. We'll talk more about this critical distinction in class.



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Q: Define, in your own words, what does it mean to remain client centric but not become blindly client driven?

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Q: Why is it important to confirm the desired outcome in every session and situation? Describe in your own words.

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Part 5: Demonstration There will be a brief audio demonstration played in class. Please listen and take notes to best be prepared to engage in a thorough debrief at the end of the demonstration. Q: What did you observe the coach do to establish trust and intimacy? Do you feel it worked? How do you come to that conclusion, through what evidence?

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Q: What might the coach have done to better demonstrate or establish trust and intimacy?

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Topic #3 – The Speed, and Need of Trust – Establishing Trust and Intimacy with the Client

Part 1: A few words Let me take a moment and offer a couple of insights into the material we'll be covering for the rest of this course. Each of the Core Competencies is an entire discussion all its own. Each one also can be concurrently demonstrated, and therefore discussed, through the process of demonstrating another competency. Example: You can demonstrate your ethical boundaries at the same time you are establishing your coaching presence. In alignment with this inner connectivity between each Core Competency, we'll be discussing each one singularly, but with a lot of cross referencing along the way. Don't worry so much about keeping them separate; in fact, enjoy the complexity of their interwoven relationships. It might make learning them a bit more challenging initially, but in the long run you'll benefit by seeing them as a woven whole and not a 'check-list'. Part 2: Think you know what 'trust' means here? Establishing trust and intimacy sound like key things to do with a coaching client, right? Sure. But what is 'trust'? Is it an agreement of honesty, is it a higher feeing, or belief? Many believe that honesty is a matter of simple integrity. The reality is, honesty is a byproduct of a safe and intimate environment, where the consequences of being honest aren't too great a risk for an individual’s own toleration. Honesty is only possible when the value of being honest isn't in conflict with a higher priority value – like safety. What does this mean? To quote the snarky and acidic TV character, Dr. Gregory House, “Everyone lies.” It's true. By resisting speaking the truth, denying the truth, or simple fabrication – at some point, everyone will lie. Imagine facing down an armed gunman who says: “I'm only letting people with children go free.” Kids or not, it's likely you'd find yourself in that line – right? The desire to live trumps honesty. Sure, it's an extreme example but the dynamic is the same regardless of the actual consequences. Your client just might keep some very important information out of your coaching sessions because the idea of your possible judgment, or their possible feelings of shame, are too frightening to think about, much less feel. Also, what about the possibility that once the information is 'out there', something will have to be done about it, and the price to pay will be simply too high. There's a lot that factors into how much honesty occurs in any given session. And yet, the fastest way to real change, and the ability to resolve sources and not keep dealing with symptoms, relies on honesty in your coaching relationship. So, how in the world can you do your job when you're not guaranteed a totally honest relationship? The good news is, you can encourage an environment where honesty is rewarded, and allowed to flourish. You can be in the personal space that you trust enough in yourself, and coaching, to be at peace with the variables that might exist around this, in relationship to the client.



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Q: What comes up for you around trusting your client?

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The challenging thing about this competency is that it's as much how you show up as it is what you do, don't do, or say. We're going to explore a few things you can do to infuse your coaching relationships with trust and intimacy, but in the end, it's always up to your client to meet you half-way. Let's take a moment and review the ICF's words on the subject to establishing trust and intimacy. They serve as a great launching point for our broader discussion. Use the area for notes below each of the following to capture the results of our review and discussion. Core Competency #3 - Establishing Trust and Intimacy with the Client - Ability to create a safe, supportive environment that produces ongoing mutual respect and trust.

6) Shows genuine concern for the client's welfare and future.

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7) Continuously demonstrates personal integrity, honesty and sincerity.

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8) Establishes clear agreements and keeps promises.

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9) Demonstrates respect for client's perceptions, learning style, personal being.

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10) Provides ongoing support for and champions new behaviors and actions, including those involving risk taking and fear of failure.

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11) Asks permission to coach client in sensitive, new areas.

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Part 3: You can't rush them, it takes time. Right? - As the coach, you follow the instructions. You care, keep agreements, respect, champion and ask permission. Is it enough? Will it cause the client to open up? No. An important aspect of this process is that it evolves according to the clients schedule, not yours. So, what is the speed of trust anyway? Is the establishment of trust and intimacy in the coaching relationship the reason so many coaches require a 3-month minimum commitment? I mean, you can't just ask people personal questions when you first get started: “they” hate that – right?



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There is often some push-back around this topic, and it does far more to hurt the coaching relationship than it does to help you demonstrate courtesy, compassion or respect for the client. Yes, coaching relationships open up, or blossom, with time, much like going to your favorite hair stylist, or working with your fitness trainer. The better they get to know you, the better they are at handling you, serving you, connecting with you, etc. The same is true with your clients. You get to more deeply understand them, they get to better understand the expectations, style and personality of your coaching. It helps them more confidently and accurately set achievable targets, and you become more proficient at eliciting their best. So, yes, time is a factor. In fact, it's fair to expect things to mature and develop over a reasonable amount of time. That said, it's often the hesitation of the coach that turns that 'reasonable' time into an odyssey. It's the coach who most often gets in the way of trust and intimacy growing within the coaching relationship. The coaches’ own hesitation undermines their overall coaching presence, which is the key component to creating the safe space for the clients’ trust to evolve. Both their limiting beliefs and their own discomfort contribute to this. Of course, so does their lack of skill and practice in the art of going-deep fast, while holding on to that essential coaching presence. I know that it's easy to lock-up around this a bit, and want to defend your beliefs about how to be respectful to your clients. So, it's time to ask some important questions: Q: What do you believe about going deep in a coaching session?

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Q: What do you think a client would be thinking/feeling if you were to go deep in a first coaching session?

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Q: What are some of the risks of going too deep, too fast?

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Q: What are some of the benefits of going deep fearlessly?

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So, how do you get out of your own way? - Change your mind. Simple to say, but not all that simple to do. Sure, you could simply make the decision to adopt a new mindset and set off to practice it. It's more likely that you'll establish a willingness to consider it, and then need some practice, positive results and support to truly make it stick – that's fine! However you get there, it's worth it. Get where exactly? To the point that as a professional coach you TOTALLY believe that trust and intimacy can come at any speed, at any time; that there are massive benefits to its arriving sooner than later, and that it's worth striving for, though never to the detriment of the client. However, that doesn't mean you won't invite them to c'mon in! And most importantly, to believe in the value of the truth, and the capacity and wisdom of your client to always handle it....whatever 'it' is. And trust in yourself to walk with your client, right up to the edge of their comfort zone and invite them to step out. Respect them if they choose not to, but even then, ask, “Are you sure?”

~ Truth, like gold, is to be obtained not by its growth,

but by washing away from it all that is not gold. ~Leo Tolstoy

~ The only way to make a man trustworthy is to trust him. ~Henry L. Stimson

~ Part 4: Demonstration There will be a brief audio demonstration played in class. Please listen and take notes to best be prepared to engage in a thorough debrief at the end of the demonstration. Q: What did you observe the coach do to establish trust and intimacy? Do you feel it worked? How



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do you come to that conclusion, through what evidence?

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Q: What might the coach have done to better demonstrate or establish trust and intimacy?

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Q: What was your learning take-away from this demonstration? How might you apply what you have learned in practice?

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Q: What were your thoughts and feelings as you listened? Were you relating to the coach, the client, or both? Notice, without judgment, if you were experiencing any discomfort and document it here. Include thoughts, feelings, as well as body discomfort. Please be willing to share these insights.

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Part 5: Practice Two, 15 minute, observed BREAK-OUT Sessions, followed by instructor debriefing.



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Topic #4 – It's All in the Questions - Powerful Questioning

Part 1: Who, What, When, Where, Why, and Beyond - One of the most notable skills of a professional coach is the ability to ask really powerful questions. It's often our questions that leave the clearest footprint in the lives of the clients. I must also confess, there is a real buzz that occurs for most coaches when they have landed just the right questions, at just the right time, in just the right manner. The instant energy 'pop' that occurs, even before the client begins to answer, tells us we've asked something that is going to expand our client, and create some great coaching opportunities too. So, what is there to study? A question is, well, a question. True, this would seem like a really basic premise to spend our time exploring. However, it's far more complex to, and rewarding to study, than it first appears! So, we begin our look into the Core Competency of Powerful Questioning. Core Competency #6 - Powerful Questioning - Ability to ask questions that reveal the information needed for maximum benefit to the coaching relationship and the client.

Asks questions that reflect active listening and an understanding of the client's perspective.

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Asks questions that evoke discovery, insight, commitment or action (e.g., those that challenge the

client's assumptions).

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Asks open-ended questions that create greater clarity, possibility or new learning.

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Asks questions that move the client towards what they desire, not questions that ask for the client to justify or look backwards.

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Part 2: Power vs. Powerful One of the bigger issues coaches face when practicing and mastering this competency is, drawing a clear distinction between power and powerful. Too often coaches take an aggressive stance and ask a forceful question, thinking it's going to be a powerful one, so it needs that kind of set up. That's far from the case. “Powerful Questioning” refers to the power of the nature of the question; not its ability to jolt the client, or the intensity of the exchange. One of the most powerful questions I personally ever asked, was done in a near whisper and only had 3 words in it. The response from my client was totally reorienting, very emotional and created an opening for an amazing conversation (I'll share all the details in class). Power doesn't equal a heavy tone, a heavy hand, or even an increase in volume. Sometimes, it's the contrast of pulling back in an already high energy situation that allows the question to really stand out and capture the client’s attention. Other times, it is a wise move to increase your intensity, but it's never the 'rule.' So, how do you know the difference? Listen hard and practice a lot! I wish I could tell you there were standardized step-by-step instructions, but there aren't. This competency, more than all the others, requires a certain amount gut-level skill. The good news is, during the rest of this course, and on into the Coaching Lab courses, you'll be practicing and observing just that. Part 3: Practice Two, 15 minute, observed BREAK-OUT Sessions, followed by instructor debriefing.



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Q: What was your learning take-away from this practice? How might you apply what you have learned in practice?

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Topic #5 - Fake it Till You Make It? No! - Coaching Presence Part 1: When you're a coach, things are different One of the reasons you likely developed interest in becoming a professional coach was because you heard, more than once, that you were easy to talk to. It's likely you also heard about how, “you give great advice”, “always know what to say”, “people just open up to you”, etc. I say this with some certainty because, it's not typical that the idea, much less the encouragement, would have been there to spur you on if you generally 'sucked' at connecting with people. For some, this ability to connect comes from training and experience they picked up through their time spent in any number of industries or situations. For others, this ability is more rooted in possessing an amazing presence that draws people to you quite unconsciously. It's often referred to as 'that special something' about a person. Sounds mysterious, doesn't it? The good news is, developing a smooth and natural coaching presence is something that you can practice, and master, no matter what your background! Again, let's turn to the ICF for the definition we'll be using as we explore and practice the competency of maintaining your Coaching Presence: Core Competency #4 - Coaching Presence - Ability to be fully conscious and create spontaneous relationship with the client, employing a style that is open, flexible and confident.

Is present and flexible during the coaching process, dancing in the moment.

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Accesses own intuition and trusts one's inner knowing - "goes with the gut.”

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6) Is open to not knowing and takes risks.

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7) Sees many ways to work with the client, and chooses in the moment what is most effective.

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Uses humor effectively to create lightness and energy.

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8) Confidently shifts perspectives and experiments with new possibilities for own action.

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9) Demonstrates confidence in working with strong emotions, and can self-manage and not be

overpowered or enmeshed by client's emotions.

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Part 2: Fake it till you make it? Uh, not really What if you're a little inexperienced, or a little unsure? Should you push through and try to be light and funny, try to be ok with risk? No, not really. One of the key factors to having an attractive and sustainable coaching presence is authenticity. This just isn't something you can fake. However, just because you're starting off a little unsure or feeling uneasy, this doesn't mean you're out of the game until you 'get it together'. Far from it! Sure, there are lots of affirmations you can practice, you can 'act as if', you can even use visualizations to get you into a coaching zone. All might work to help you get a coaching game-face in place, but it's not likely they will actually help evolve your true coaching presence. The number one thing that will help you find your real coaching presence is this: Trust the coaching process and yourself! Planter vs. Harvester No, that isn't a new iPad game. Even though a client has hired you to work with them, it doesn't mean you're the beginning and end of their journey through the area they have chosen to work on. In fact, it's much more likely that you're just one stop on a much longer odyssey. Too often though, coaches seeking significance and validation, or who are personally uncomfortable with their clients’ learning curves, feel that the entire issue/challenge must be resolved under their watch for it to be considered a coaching success. Hog-wash! Sometimes you're planting seeds and sometimes you're harvesting the crop – rarely are you there for the first plant AND the last harvest. As coaches we frequently meet out clients at the point where some nagging feeling, recurring pattern, or lingering issue has them saying, “Enough!” That is pretty solid proof that many seeds were planted before we ever met them. It's also likely that they have done some personal work, read some books, tried some things and found a little improvement. This is proof that earlier harvests have been had too. The point is this, you never actually know where you are in the big picture. This can be a hard pill to swallow. In fact, not accepting this fact is often the cause of a total derailment in the area of coaching presence. If you reflect back to the definitions we discussed earlier, they can all be undermined by a nervous energy to produce, a discomfort with the issue or challenge at hand, and the belief that it's your



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job to 'fix this' once and for all. So, what's the shift to make? Trust! Trust the coaching process. I invite you to consider that if it's impossible to know, for sure, where you are in the bigger picture of the client’s life journey, then just relax. Focus on the opportunity you have before you and breathe. Remember: in the client’s journey, you are but one stop, perhaps one VERY important stop, but one stop nonetheless. This one thought shift can support you in being present with your client, out of your head and in the coaching process. Q: What is the coaching process?

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Q: What does it mean to you to trust the coaching process?

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Q: How would trusting the coaching impact your coaching presence?

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Part 3: Demonstration There will be a brief coaching demonstration in class. Please listen so you'll be able to share your insights about the following. Take notes and be prepared to engage in a through debrief discussion at the end of the demonstration.



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Q: What did you observe the coach do to establish their coaching presence? Do you feel it worked? How do you come to that conclusion, through what evidence?

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Q: What might the coach have done to better demonstrate or establish their coaching presence?

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Q: What were your thoughts and feelings as you listened? Were you relating to the coach, the client, or both? Notice, without judgment, if you were experiencing any discomfort and document it here. Include thoughts, feelings, as well as body discomfort. Please be willing to share these insights in the group discussion.

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Topic #6 – Did You Hear That?– Active Listening Part 1: Listening as an art form I already mentioned that you've likely heard feedback about what a good listener you are, but now we're going to put that idea to a bit of a test. We're going to expand you skills as an active listener and challenge you to adopt, perhaps an even broader meaning of the word 'listening' then you've considered before. Also, as we expand your language and understanding of listening as an art form, you'll find your overall confidence and clarity are expanded too! Core Competency #5 - Active Listening: Ability to focus completely on what the client is saying and is not saying, to understand the meaning of what is said in the context of the client's desires, and to support client self-expression

• Attends to the client and the client's agenda, and not to the coach's agenda for the client.

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• Hears the client's concerns, goals, values and beliefs about what is and is not possible.

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• Distinguishes between the words, the tone of voice, and the body language.

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• Summarizes, paraphrases, reiterates, mirrors back what client has said to ensure clarity and understanding.

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• Encourages, accepts, explores and reinforces the client's expression of feelings, perceptions,

concerns, beliefs, suggestions, etc.

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• Integrates and builds on client's ideas and suggestions.

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• "Bottom-lines" or understands the essence of the client's communication and helps the client get there rather than engaging in long descriptive stories.



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• Allows the client to vent or "clear" the situation without judgment or attachment in order to move on to next steps.

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Part 2: The listening dream team: Curiosity, Confirmation, Contextualization To truly become a masterful listener here are three things, amongst many, to consciously practice: Curiosity, Confirmation and Contextualization. Focusing on and practicing these three things will hone your listening skills, elevate and support you in discovering a whole new level of connection with your client. It's so rare that we really hear one another in every day social conversation that when a client feels this from you, you will be amazed by the possible reactions. I've experienced clients who are so filled with emotion they are speechless, moved to tears, excited, oddly relaxed and even stunned – all because they felt that I 'got it.' I 'got' them. Being understood is a powerful experience. Curiosity - You're going to hear me mention this a lot throughout the training overall. Curiosity is one of the most valuable things a coach can embrace. It seems so simple, and yet it's amazingly powerful. As coaches we are curious about many things; we ask a lot of questions. It's when we consciously practice asking ourselves, “What is there to be curious about in what my client has shared?”, that we move to a new level of effectiveness in leveraging our natural inquisitiveness into a real coaching tool. Q: What kinds of things are there to be curious about?

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Confirmation - Taking the time to confirm can seem like an unnecessary step. It's also way more than simply repeating things back to the client to be sure you got them right, (while that in and of itself is also VERY valuable). Everyone knows when a client says, “I want to be loved”, what they mean – right? Nope. In fact, you'll discover that there are many times even the client doesn't really know what s/he means when s/he says something. Clients often use throw-away words and generalized phrases that are actually misfits to their real situation or thoughts. Example: A client who say's, “I'm just not good enough” has just shared a powerful belief. It's likely to have them emotionally charged and a bit raw. So, as the coach, you might want to reassure them, soothe them and motivate them to move on. But wait! What a different experience can be had if you get curious and seek confirmation... “I hear what you've said and I want to thank you for your honesty. I do have a couple of questions though; may I explore what you've said?”...

• When you say you're not good enough, what do you feel you're not good enough for, to do, or to have? Specifically, what comes to mind?

• What would being 'good enough' look like? I mean, how would you know if you were 'good

enough', what would you be looking for?

• Can you tell me a time when you felt great about something you did? A time when you were feeling very much that you were 'good enough'?

• Is that a belief you created, or one that you converted from someone else's opinion?

Can you imagine the expanded conversations possible from these 'launching-point; type questions? In a process of an expansion like this you're creating awareness and confirming the details of the blanket belief, 'not good enough.' The reveal here could be that 'good enough', really means, 'smart enough.' Further, they could have their entire sense of 'good enough' attached to a dollar amount they want to earn, a relationship they want to have or some other specific area of their lives, hidden by the generalized assessment of their overall situation. Be willing to explore to find deeper levels, clearer meanings and expanded definitions. Q: What are some things you can confirm with your client?

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Contextualization - What else is at play here? So, you've taken the time to be consciously curious and to confirm, and confirm some more – good! Now, it's time to look at the bigger picture, and ask a bold question: What is perfect about this, exactly as it is, right now? It's easy to see that a cheating spouse, caught in the act, might be traumatic and deemed as 'bad'. But, in the bigger context, if the client has been complaining about the relationship for months and battling with their beliefs about 'sticking it out'.....well, this could be exactly what was NECESSARY to open the door to new options. Painful or not, it could be exactly what was called for to un-stick the situation. Your ability to see the higher ground, the greater dynamics at play in any situation, will empower you to choose your responses more easily, (therefore, not reacting to immediate stimulus). Eventually, even engaging in conversation or introducing this concept to your client is suitable, and valuable. However, that's a delicate balance of timing and readiness. We'll explore that later in great detail. For now, practice seeking the bigger picture for yourself. Once you're well practiced at it, you will have the foundation to support exploring such ideas with your clients when the time is right. How does this relate to listening? Simple, when you're only hearing words and not seeing the bigger picture, it's easy to fall into a reaction and/or a judgement. Once you're there, listening can be all but impossible. Q: What is your experience with seeing something as bad at first, but discovering the 'silver lining' later?

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Q: What does this concept mean to you and how might you apply it to your coaching?

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Part 3: Practice Four, 15 minute, observed BREAK-OUT Sessions, followed by instructor debriefing.



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Topic #7 – Say it, Own it, and Wrap it Carefully - Direct Communication

Part 1: Just say it!! You know when you want to say something, but it seems like it doesn't ever get said? Either you speak around it, or you hint at it, or you just keep letting it fester, unsaid. I think everyone has done this at least once – many of us do it once a week! At other times, you might have had a 'gum-ball' moment, when the words simply drop out of the chute before you even have a chance to catch it. As coaches, not only do we encourage our clients to eliminate these habits, but we have to do it ourselves too. Conscious communication is a totally different process from talking. In this session we're going to explore the standards for professional coaching communication, and getting out of our own way to do it well. Core Competency #7 - Direct Communication - Ability to communicate effectively during coaching sessions, and to use language that has the greatest positive impact on the client.

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1) Is clear, articulate and direct in sharing and providing feedback.

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• Reframes and articulates to help the client understand from another perspective what he/she wants or is uncertain about.

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1) Clearly states coaching objectives, meeting agenda, purpose of techniques or exercises.

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• Uses language appropriate and respectful to the client (e.g., non-sexist, non-racist, non-

technical, non-jargon).

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• Uses metaphor and analogy to help to illustrate a point or paint a verbal picture.

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Part 2: The power and complexity of language. No, it's not really an English lesson. One of the most overlooked techniques in coaching, in my opinion, is the laser-like use of analogies, metaphors, colloquialisms, and to a much lesser extent, idioms. I mention laser-like because I'm not suggesting tossing around stale and ill-fitting quips; I'm talking about knowing how to reach your client in the language they understand. Even in that statement, there is yet another caveat! It's not about



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judging what the client is, or is not, capable of understanding, (meaning not diminishing their intelligence or comprehension), it's about choosing the most direct way to reach them in any given moment in a coaching session. What that could include: in the face of tragedy, crisis, major change, raw emotional states, deep fear, and resistance to new ideas, behaviors or concepts. So, in a nutshell, it's about cutting through the walls, the filters that might be in place. When filters are present, a bright and vibrant person can easily fail to even register a simple truth when they hear it. The power of language allows us, as the communication professionals, to look for the signs, be prepared for the filters, and be ready to shift our approach on-the-fly. Let's look at the Wikipedia definitions of a few key words for guidance in choosing and better understanding our language options. Colloquialism: A colloquialism is a word or phrase that is common in everyday, unconstrained conversation rather than in formal speech. Colloquialisms are sometimes referred to collectively as "youknowhatitis language" Example: "y'all" or "gonna" or "wanna"), or phrases such as "old as the hills" and "graveyard dead". Analogy: An analogy can be a spoken or textual comparison between two words (or sets of words) to highlight some form of semantic similarity between them. Such analogies can be used to strengthen political and philosophical arguments, even when the semantic similarity is weak or non-existent (if crafted carefully for the audience). Greek philosophers such as Plato and Aristotle actually used a wider notion of analogy. They saw analogy as a shared abstraction. Analogous objects did not necessarily share only a relation, but also an idea, a pattern, a regularity, an attribute, an effect or a function. Example: "MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken." (Lewis Black) "Memory is to love what the saucer is to the cup." (Elizabeth Bowen, The House in Paris, 1949) Metaphor: Metaphors are comparisons that show how two things that are not alike in most ways are similar in one important way. A metaphor is more forceful (active) than an analogy, because metaphor asserts that two things are the same, whereas analogy implies a difference. Example: Life is a journey, purposes are destinations, difficulties are obstacles, counselors are guides, achievements are landmarks, choices are crossroads Idiom: is an expression, word, or phrase that has a figurative meaning, that is comprehended in regard to a common use of that expression, that is separate from the literal meaning or definition of the words of which it is made. There are estimated to be at least 25,000 idiomatic expressions in the English language. Example: Beating around the bush / Spill the beans / Kick the bucket. Jargon: In other words, the term covers the language used by people who work in a particular area or who have a common interest. Much like slang, it can develop as a kind of short-hand, to express ideas that are frequently discussed between members of a group, though it can also be developed deliberately, using chosen terms. A standard term may be given a more precise or unique usage among practitioners of a field. In many cases this causes a barrier to communication with those not familiar



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with the language of the field. Q: Name some of the jargon used that is specific to the coaching and personal development worlds:

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Practical Example: The client has just been fired and is terrified about engaging in job interviews. The coach begins to discuss crafting a strategy and honing interview skills, but notices the client starting to drift and become inattentive. Knowing the clients passion for horses, the coach begins to ask if there is a similarity between what they are feeling right now, (or situation they are facing right now), and their experience with their horses. Suddenly a connection is made, distancing the emotion from the client, and setting it in a language syntax (as well as analogous distinctions and examples) with which she has confidence and clarity. This gives the client enough 'space' around her own issue to safely re-approach it through the experiences with her horses. What the coach did NOT do is toss out the notion, “You have to get back on that horse!” Q: What 'topical' languages do you have experience in?

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Q: Design a metaphor, idiom or analogy for the following situations, that would reach you: Client is experiencing a lot of anxiety and feels a lot of pressure as s/he begins practicing a new skill.

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Client has had a major set back and feels s/he isn’t 'good enough.'

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Client interviewed for a job, but didn't get selected.

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Q: What is the main take-away from this conversation? How will you integrate it into your practice of coaching?

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Part 3: Practice Four, 15 minute, observed BREAK-OUT Sessions, followed by instructor debriefing. Q: What was your learning take-away from this practice? How might you apply what you have learned in practice?

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Topic #8 – Let there be Light! - Creating Awareness Part 1: NOW I see! Living on auto-pilot is a pretty common experience. In fact, one of the most important contributors to 'getting what you've always got' is 'doing what you've always done' unconsciously. Bringing awareness to your client is one of the biggest game-changers in coaching! A client can't address, change or celebrate something they don't know exists. The difference between a person who keeps getting the same results at work and one that continues to advance and evolve, is often a greater understanding of the bigger picture, the underlying dynamics and the power of conscious responding to it versus unconscious reacting to it. There is so MUCH to create awareness of, that this session will be rich with insights for you to use in your next coaching session! Core Competency # 8 - Creating Awareness - Ability to integrate and accurately evaluate multiple sources of information, and to make interpretations that help the client to gain awareness and thereby achieve agreed-upon results.

• Goes beyond what is said in assessing client's concerns, not getting hooked by the client's description.

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• Invokes inquiry for greater understanding, awareness and clarity.

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• Identifies for the client his/her underlying concerns, typical and fixed ways of perceiving

himself/herself and the world, differences between the facts and the interpretation, disparities between thoughts, feelings and action.

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• Helps clients to discover for themselves the new thoughts, beliefs, perceptions, emotions,

moods, etc. that strengthen their ability to take action and achieve what is important to them.

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• Communicates broader perspectives to clients and inspires commitment to shift their viewpoints

and find new possibilities for action.

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• Helps clients to see the different, interrelated factors that affect them and their behaviors (e.g.,

thoughts, emotions, body, background).

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• Expresses insights to clients in ways that are useful and meaningful for the client.

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• Identifies major strengths vs. major areas for learning and growth, and what is most important

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• Asks the client to distinguish between trivial and significant issues, situational vs. recurring

behaviors when detecting a separation between what is being stated and what is being done.

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Part 2: It's not real ‘till you can talk about it Invisible recurring patterns can be the key to your success or the fast track to disaster. The difference between the financial success of someone who sets up an auto transfer to move 10% of their income from checking to savings each month, and the person who cashes their check and puts the money in their pocket can be profound. Calling out the possibility that the 'habit' isn't in alignment with their dreams of financial stability, creates awareness, which creates opportunity for designed change. However, until the habit is even identified, there is little chance for change. The same is true for someone who stops to get coffee every day on the way to work. However, they always wind up late and it's a constant source of tension in the workplace. Through exploration with a coach, this individual might discover that her/his belief that the boss is 'harsh' and 'doesn't like her/him', is rooted in some tangible patterns that S/HE has total ability to change. Big difference! The ability to speak about something and call it into the light, makes it real and begins to loosen its power. Think of the very nature of a 'secret'. A secret only has power when it's kept. Once it's shared, and shared broadly, it begins to lose all its control. So, what is there to call forward and bring awareness to? Let's explore this via group discussion: Q: What is of value to create awareness around?

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More than meets the eye - Once your clients have had their awareness opened up, they will begin to view themselves, their influence, their results and their possibilities differently. The simple act of calling attention to something that you, as the coach, detect through your sessions, can open the door to exponential impact on your clients’ lives! Part 3: Demonstration There will be a brief coaching demonstration in class. Please listen so you'll be able to share your insights about the following. Take notes and be prepared to engage in a thorough debrief and discussion at the end of the demonstration. Q: What did you observe the coach do to Create Awareness? Do you feel it worked? How do you come to that conclusion, through what evidence?

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Q: What might the coach have done to better Create Awareness? What else might there have been the opportunity to Create Awareness around?

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Topic #9 – The Action Trifecta, Part One - Designing Actions Part 1: Designing for maximum impact! What's this 'Trifecta' thing? Well, this competency, plus the next two, make up a trio of perfect skills to generate the most direct and effective actions your client can take. Not to mention, how to help support them in making them! Core Competency #9 - Designing Actions - Ability to create with the client opportunities for ongoing learning, during coaching and in work/life situations, and for taking new actions that will most effectively lead to agreed-upon coaching results.

12) Brainstorms and assists the client to define actions that will enable the client to demonstrate, practice and deepen new learning.

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13) Helps the client to focus on and systematically explore specific concerns and opportunities that

are central to agreed-upon coaching goals.



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14) Engages the client to explore alternative ideas and solutions, to evaluate options, and to make

related decisions.

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15) Promotes active experimentation and self-discovery, where the client applies what has been

discussed and learned during sessions immediately afterwards in his/her work or life setting.

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16) Celebrates client successes and capabilities for future growth.

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17) Challenges client's assumptions and perspectives to provoke new ideas and find new

possibilities for action.

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18) Advocates or brings forward points of view that are aligned with client goals and, without

attachment, engages the client to consider them.

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19) Helps the client "Do It Now" during the coaching session, providing immediate support.

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20) Encourages stretches and challenges but also a comfortable pace of learning.

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Part 2: Demonstration There will be a brief coaching demonstration in class. Please listen so you'll be able to share your insights about the following. Take notes and be prepared to engage in a thorough debrief and discussion at the end of the demonstration. Q: What did you observe the coach do to Design Actions? Do you feel it worked? How do you come to that conclusion, through what evidence?

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Q: What might the coach have done to better Design Actions? What else might there have been the opportunity to Design Actions around?

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Part 4: Practice Two, 15 minute, observed BREAK-OUT Sessions, followed by instructor debriefing.



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Topic #10 – The Action Trifecta, Part Two - Designing Actions Part 1: Core Competency #10 - Planning and Goal Setting - Ability to develop and maintain an effective coaching plan with the client.

10) Consolidates collected information and establishes a coaching plan and development goals with the client that address concerns and major areas for learning and development.

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11) Creates a plan with results that are attainable, measurable, specific and have target dates.

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12) Makes plan adjustments as warranted by the coaching process and by changes in the situation.

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13) Helps the client identify and access different resources for learning (e.g., books, other professionals).

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14) Identifies and targets early successes that are important to the client.

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Part 2: Group Discussion Q: What can you draw from the learning above about the relationship between Designing Actions, and Planning and Goal Setting? Be prepared to share your thoughts and insights in a group discussion.

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Q: Share a few examples of actions IN alignment with a good coaching plan. Explain why you feel these actions are IN alignment.

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Q: Share a few examples of actions OUT of alignment with a good coaching plan. Explain why you feel these actions are OUT of alignment.

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Q: What types of circumstances would indicate there being a real value in changing the plan, switching gears, or putting a plan on the back-burner?

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Part 3: Is this the 'feet to the fire' part? - Managing Progress and Accountability Many coaches struggle in the area of Managing Progress and Accountability, (there are several reasons for this, which we'll discuss more fully a bit later in this session). It's the area that can stir a lot of resistance and one that will, for sure, undermine the coach’s ability to sustain a professional coaching relationship, much less a successful coaching practice! I know that sounds a lot like what was shared regarding Designing Actions, and Planning and Goal Setting. It's because these three competencies together are a real make-it-or-break-it team. Exploration is great, insight is great, results still need to occur! Let's turn again to the ICF for the standards and language of this Core Competency. Core Competency #11 - Managing Progress and Accountability - Ability to hold attention on what is important for the client, and to leave responsibility with the client to take action.

• Clearly requests of the client actions that will move the client toward their stated goals.

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• Demonstrates follow through by asking the client about those actions that the client committed to during the previous session(s).

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• Acknowledges the client for what s/he has done, not done, learned or become aware of since the

previous coaching session(s).

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• Effectively prepares, organizes and reviews with client information obtained during sessions.

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• Keeps the client on track between sessions by holding attention on the coaching plan and

outcomes, agreed-upon courses of action, and topics for future session(s).

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• Focuses on the coaching plan but is also open to adjusting behaviors and actions based on the

coaching process and shifts in direction during sessions.

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• Is able to move back and forth between the big picture of where the client is heading, setting a

context for what is being discussed and where the client wishes to go.

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• Promotes client's self-discipline and holds the client accountable for what s/he says s/he is going

to do for the results of an intended action, or for a specific plan with related time frames.

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• Develops the client's ability to make decisions, address key concerns, and develop

himself/herself (to get feedback, to determine priorities and set the pace of learning, to reflect on and learn from experiences).

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• Positively confronts the client with the fact that he/she did not take agreed-upon actions.

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Part 4: Beyond the obvious, the YOU factor While the definition of this Core Competency is quite extensive, it doesn't address one of the most critical underlying factors to enable you to demonstrate it well – the YOU factor. Believe it or not, how you feel about your being held accountable will be a big influence here. Also in the mix are your beliefs about how your clients will feel about being held accountable. In fact, one of the questions often heard around this particular part of the coaching process is, “How can I hold someone else accountable when I struggle with this myself?” GOOD QUESTION! Here is a raw, unvarnished truth – you can't. It's a harsh reality, but it's true. You can fake it, you can use some canned and processed systems to encourage, (or force), it, but you really won't excel at it till it's no longer an issue for YOU. So, does this mean you can't coach till you get yourself 'in order'? No! It does mean that you won't master this competency until you have an effective system for addressing your own accountability issues in place. A coach, for example, working with you regularly on your relationship with accountability, or a system in place that encourages and makes sustainable your own progress is essential. If you thrive in this area, GREAT! If you struggle in this area, you're likely to experience challenges with your clients’ accountability too. Just be aware and be willing to address your challenges and beliefs right along side of those of your clients. This is fine – in fact, it's modeling! This is exactly the ideal behind one of our earlier conversations regarding, “not doing anything that reflects negatively on the profession of coaching” – remember that conversation from our Ethics and Conduct course? This could easily be interpreted as exactly what we're talking about. Q: What are your challenges with being held accountable? What are you doing to address them? What do you have in place to measure your progress?

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Q: What are your processes for bringing accountability into conversation, and practice, with your clients?

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Q: What is your main take-away from the review of this Competency and our discussion? How will you incorporate this insight into your coaching relationships and/or practice?

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Topic #11 – The Review and Debrief – The Core Competencies

In conclusion, we're just getting started! In this course we've covered a lot of ground and yet, we're far from done. It's expected that the information we've explored and practiced during our sessions is going to continue to be a major focus in your ongoing training and development. It's truly like the difference in impact and understanding when reading a book about love when you're single, versus after a nasty break-up, versus while in the relationship of your dreams. Same words, very different experience of the book – right? This is no different. Who you are right now, where you are right now, is influencing your understanding, and your practical application of the Core Competencies. As you continue your professional evolution, your grasp and capability to demonstrate each competency will evolve as well. I highly suggest a scheduled practice of reviewing them at least once every six months during the first 3 years of your professional coaching career. Do it even more frequently if you're concurrently making some major life changes on your own! Each Core Competency is a gem, a standard and a challenge. Embracing them, adopting them and rising to the challenges they inspire will ensure your success as a Professional Coach! Part 1 – Discussion and Challenge - The Final Review In this session we're again going to engage in extended practice and debrief coaching sessions, but there is going to be more too! First, a demonstration, live in class. We'll debrief that together. Next, we're going to round-robin field questions about each of the Core Competencies! As your instructor calls your name, you'll have the right to 'pass' or 'answer' the question, after hearing it read to you. You only have the option of one (1) 'pass' – use it wisely. Expect to be called on between 3 and 5 times. You may have notes handy, and refer to them, during this process. However, if you take too



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long to 'search' for your answer, you'll be buzzed out for the question, (it will be considered missed), and be required to complete a bonus assignment to formally complete the coursework. If you miss more than one question, you will be required to complete a bonus assignment to formally complete the coursework. Finally we'll be doing some listening, evaluating and debriefing of a pre-recorded session. Regarding the audio session, by now, you know the drill: our focus will be on calling out when a Core Competency has been demonstrated, how it might have been better or more fully demonstrated, and expanding our understanding of the Competencies in general. The process for this is to listen to a few segments of coaching sessions, as a group, and then share in a group debrief which focuses on the demonstration of all the Core Competencies. Part 2 - Practice Two, 15 minute, observed BREAK-OUT Sessions, followed by instructor debriefing. Q: What was your learning take-away from this practice? How might you apply what you have learned in practice?

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Q: What is the main take-away you learned from these exercises?

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Topics #12 - #17 – Coaching Practice and Demonstration

Each session during the practice and demonstration phase of the curriculum training is designed to take the understanding and application of the Core Competencies deeper. Each student will be coached, and will coach, multiple times. These coaching sessions will be observed by the instructor, and the other students acting as observers, (at the instructor’s discretion.) Written feedback will be provided by your instructor. (Verbal feedback may be shared by your classmates (time permitting and at the instructor’s discretion. ) Some coaching sessions will be live, others may be pre-recorded. Please refer to the Coaching Practice form at the back of this manual. It will be used to facilitate discussion and feedback. Topics #18 – Review of Professional Coaching Program

Well, we've come a long way, haven't we? It's been a few short weeks together, and in that time you've studied, practiced, observed, grown and been challenged in most every way imaginable! And, here you are! Congratulations! Only one step left.... Once again we're going to 'round-robin' field questions about each of the Core Competencies and the Coaching Ethics and Conduct! As your instructor calls your name, you'll have the right to 'pass' or 'answer' the question, after hearing it read to you. You only have the option of one (1) 'pass' – use it wisely. Expect to be called on between 3 and 5 times. You may have notes handy, and refer to them, during this process. However, if you take too long to 'search' for your answer, you'll be buzzed out for the question, (it will be considered missed), and be required to complete a bonus assignment to formally complete the coursework. If you miss more than one question, you will be required to complete a bonus assignment to formally complete the coursework. Discussion - Q: What are the Core Competencies you feel most comfortable with? Why?

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Q: What are the Core Competencies you feel least comfortable with? Why?

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Q: Describe how you plan to continue your development around the Core Competencies

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Next Steps You've done it! Congratulations and bravo! Now all that's left to complete your program is to take the final exam, (written), and if assigned, complete the bonus assignment (s) your instructor may have given you. You have 30-days in which to complete both action items. Upon passing the written exam, and completing any bonus assignment (s) required, you'll be notified of your Certified Graduate status. Any questions about your specific requirements, or your completion status, please contact your instructor, or school administrator. It is our sincere hope you've enjoyed this training, and that you've been equally challenged and supported along the way. We welcome your feedback and hope to see you in the Master Professional Coach Training program.



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APPENDIX A

ICF CODE OF ETHICS Part One: Definition of Coaching Section 1: Definitions

• Coaching: Coaching is partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires

them to maximize their personal and professional potential. • A professional coaching relationship: A professional coaching relationship exists when coaching

includes a business agreement or contract that defines the responsibilities of each party. • An ICF Professional Coach: An ICF Professional Coach also agrees to practice the ICF Professional

Core Competencies and pledges accountability to the ICF Code of Ethics. In order to clarify roles in the coaching relationship, it is often necessary to distinguish between the client and the sponsor. In most cases, the client and sponsor are the same person and therefore jointly referred to as the client. For purposes of identification, however, the International Coach Federation defines these roles as follows:

• Client: The "client" is the person(s) being coached. • Sponsor: The "sponsor" is the entity (including its representatives) paying for and/or arranging for

coaching services to be provided. In all cases, coaching engagement contracts or agreements should clearly establish the rights, roles, and responsibilities for both the client and sponsor if they are not the same persons. Part Two: The ICF Standards of Ethical Conduct Preamble: ICF Professional Coaches aspire to conduct themselves in a manner that reflects positively upon the coaching profession; are respectful of different approaches to coaching; and recognize that they are also bound by applicable laws and regulations. Section 1: Professional Conduct At Large As a coach:

2) I will not knowingly make any public statement that is untrue or misleading about what I offer as a coach, or make false claims in any written documents relating to the coaching profession or my credentials or the ICF.

3) I will accurately identify my coaching qualifications, expertise, experience, certifications and ICF

Credentials.

4) I will recognize and honor the efforts and contributions of others and not misrepresent them as my own. I understand that violating this standard may leave me subject to legal remedy by a third party.



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5) I will, at all times, strive to recognize personal issues that may impair, conflict, or interfere with my coaching performance or my professional coaching relationships. Whenever the facts and circumstances necessitate, I will promptly seek professional assistance and determine the action to be taken, including whether it is appropriate to suspend or terminate my coaching relationship(s).

6) I will conduct myself in accordance with the ICF Code of Ethics in all coach training, coach mentoring,

and coach supervisory activities.

7) I will conduct and report research with competence, honesty, and within recognized scientific standards and applicable subject guidelines. My research will be carried out with the necessary consent and approval of those involved, and with an approach that will protect participants from any potential harm. All research efforts will be performed in a manner that complies with all the applicable laws of the country in which the research is conducted.

8) I will maintain, store, and dispose of any records created during my coaching business in a manner that

promotes confidentiality, security, and privacy, and complies with any applicable laws and agreements.

9) I will use ICF member contact information (e-mail addresses, telephone numbers, etc.) only in the manner and to the extent authorized by the ICF.

Section 2: Conflicts of Interest As a coach:

10) I will seek to avoid conflicts of interest and potential conflicts of interest and openly disclose any such conflicts. I will offer to remove myself when such a conflict arises.

11) I will disclose to my client and his or her sponsor all anticipated compensation from third parties that I may pay or receive for referrals of that client.

12) I will only barter for services, goods or other non-monetary remuneration when it will not impair the

coaching relationship.

13) I will not knowingly take any personal, professional, or monetary advantage or benefit of the coach-client relationship, except by a form of compensation as agreed in the agreement or contract.

Section 3: Professional Conduct with Clients As a coach:

14) I will not knowingly mislead or make false claims about what my client or sponsor will receive from the coaching process or from me as the coach.

15) I will not give my prospective clients or sponsors information or advice I know or believe to be misleading or false.

16) I will have clear agreements or contracts with my clients and sponsor(s). I will honor all agreements or contracts made in the context of professional coaching relationships.



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17) I will carefully explain and strive to ensure that, prior to or at the initial meeting, my coaching client and sponsor(s) understand the nature of coaching, the nature and limits of confidentiality, financial arrangements, and any other terms of the coaching agreement or contract.

18) I will be responsible for setting clear, appropriate, and culturally sensitive boundaries that govern any

physical contact I may have with my clients or sponsors.

19) I will not become sexually intimate with any of my current clients or sponsors.

20) I will respect the client's right to terminate the coaching relationship at any point during the process, subject to the provisions of the agreement or contract. I will be alert to indications that the client is no longer benefiting from our coaching relationship.

21) I will encourage the client or sponsor to make a change if I believe the client or sponsor would be better

served by another coach or by another resource.

22) I will suggest my client seek the services of other professionals when deemed necessary or appropriate. Section 4: Confidentiality/Privacy As a coach:

23) I will maintain the strictest levels of confidentiality with all client and sponsor information. I will have a clear agreement or contract before releasing information to another person, unless required by law.

24) I will have a clear agreement upon how coaching information will be exchanged among coach, client, and sponsor.

25) When acting as a trainer of student coaches, I will clarify confidentiality policies with the students.

26) I will have associated coaches and other persons whom I manage in service of my clients and their

sponsors in a paid or volunteer capacity make clear agreements or contracts to adhere to the ICF Code of Ethics Part 2, Section 4: Confidentiality/Privacy standards and the entire ICF Code of Ethics to the extent applicable.

Part Three: The ICF Pledge of Ethics As an ICF Professional Coach, I acknowledge and agree to honor my ethical and legal obligations to my coaching clients and sponsors, colleagues, and to the public at large. I pledge to comply with the ICF Code of Ethics, and to practice these standards with those whom I coach. If I breach this Pledge of Ethics or any part of the ICF Code of Ethics, I agree that the ICF in its sole discretion may hold me accountable for so doing. I further agree that my accountability to the ICF for any breach may include sanctions, such as loss of my ICF membership and/or my ICF Credentials. Approved by the Ethics and Standards Committee on October 30, 2008. Approved by the ICF Board of Directors on December 18, 2008



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APPENDIX B

INTAKE RESOURCES

There are many assessments, exercises, questions and processes to help you create a powerful client intake process. Here is a brief list to get you started. Explore each one and see if it's the best fit for you and your professional coaching practice.

ICA Assessments

• Various assessments (e.g. Self-Awareness Assessment; Wheel of Life, Client Screening for a Successful Engagement; ADHD Assessment)

Strengths Finder – from the book: 'Now Discover Your Strengths', by Buckingham and Clifton

• This is a wonderful book and includes, with the book purchase, a complimentary online

assessment if the individuals strengths. It's very insightful. Temperament Sorter – from the book: 'Please Understand Me II', by Keirsey

• Are you an ENFJ? And if you are, what does that mean?? This is a great book to inspire a

lot of conversation between you and your clients, or prospects. D.I.S.C. Assessment – details here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DISC_assessment

• This is by far, one of the most well-known assessments in the world. Insightful and

powerful! Check it out and decide if it's right for you.

PRINT Assessment – By Print Strategies – details here: http://www.printstrategies.com/

• This assessment is a great long-term coaching tool. Its primary focus is on motivators and

behaviors. Very interesting and accurate too!



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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DISC_assessment

http://www.printstrategies.com/

COACHING AGREEMENT – SAMPLE As the COACH, I agree to the following: 2) To, without judgment, explore and examine your current life plan and its effectiveness in getting you the

results you want for yourself 3) To partner with you in crafting strategies to promote action in the direction of your most authentic self and

your truest dreams. 4) To stay in learning mode in order to continuously improve my skills allowing me to always bring value and

cutting edge information to you as my client 5) I will honor you by being punctual, flexible, reliable, respectful, confidential and professional in all aspects

of our coaching relationship. I will firmly adhere to the code of ethics as outlined by the International Association of Coaches and the International Coach Federation.

6) I will support you, champion you, challenge you and frequently make specific requests of you including assessments and homework

7) I will be honest and state openly that I am NOT qualified to diagnose or treat any medical or psychological condition. If there are medical or psychological factors at work in your life currently or should they become issues during our relationship, it is critical that you promptly seek the proper professional assistance.

_______________________________ _________________ Your Name (Coach) Date

As the CLIENT I agree to the following:

8) I have read and understand the details included in the Welcome Packet provided to me by the coach. 9) I agree to be punctual, respectful and truthful at all times. 10) I understand the nature of the coaching relationship. Furthermore, I realize that I alone am responsible for

myself and any actions I take or don’t take as a result of my coaching relationship. I hold my coach, Terri Hase, harmless from all legal action relating to the coaching relationship and services provided within it.

11) I agree to the amount and terms of payment as outlined on my payment authorization form (attached)I agree that it is up to me to bring my best to the coaching relationship and failure to do so will not lead to my full success. I therefore agree to take action when necessary, respect truth when revealed and complete all assignments with the best of my integrity. __________________________________ _________________________________ Client Date

Before we get started, please answer the following questions with as much detail as possible, and send your responses to me prior to our first session: What do you want more of in your life? What do you want less of in your life? What would you like your life to say to the world about you? What are you involved in that is greater than yourself? What, if any, concerns or worries do you have in your life right now? As of right now, what 3 tangible accomplishments would you like to succeed at during our coaching relationship?



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COACHING WELCOME AND INTAKE PACKET - SAMPLE

Welcome ! Thank you for your inquiry regarding my coaching services and congratulations for taking the first step towards having the life you want. The purpose of this packet is to provide you with some important information before we begin this process. I hope to answer some questions you may have, and provide you with some insight as to how we might work together to change your life. Some of your questions may include the following: Is this therapy? No, coaching is not therapy. While both are very valuable in moving you past roadblocks in life, their approaches differ in many ways. Coaching is about taking you from where you are now and moving you forward. Therapy often involves extensively examining your past to define how you got here in the first place. Additionally, there are some clients who benefit from working with both professionals concurrently. Finally, and foremost, coaches do not diagnose or treat any psychiatric disorders. So, what is coaching? In short, it’s a collaborative process, in which I help you define, speak out loud, and strategically move toward what you really want in life. I will help you find success as you define it - and deserve it! How will you help me do that? Bringing to our relationship my personal, professional and educational experience allows me to utilize many skills in our work together.

• I listen to you - not for judgment but for understanding • I ask questions that allow you to think in new and revealing ways • I motivate, encourage and support you every step of the way • I share resources that will assist you and provide good information • I help you reveal, define and then focus on your true passions and dreams • I co-create a supportive structures and environments in your life - ones you can count on • I hold you to your inner highest standard - accountable to your personal best!

Who uses a coach? Individuals, families, small companies, large corporations and....you! Coaching is found in every industry and situation you can imagine. Life provides an abundance of circumstances, coaching provides and abundance of support. Successful coaching clients typically have just a few factors in common-

1. They are willing to ask questions and challenge perceptions. 2. They are willing to reveal the truth, learn from it and take action. 3. They have a vision, although frequently clouded, of a better life. 4. They are highly functioning, intelligent people with a desire to realize their best.



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How long should I expect to need a coach? The average amount of time clients keep their coaches varies based by client and situation. I request a 90-day minimum commitment from my clients. I find it allows their success to evolve more effectively since our relationship has some time to grow. One of my definitions of success is when we end our relationship! Of course, that's because you’ve finally got less of, and more of, the things you want - we’ve succeeded. And most importantly, you’ve got the skills to keep it that way. What types of things do I work on with you as my coach? What you want - What you need. I define it as having less and having more. Having Less: Fear / Frustration / Boredom / Resentment / Disappointment / Doubt / Confusion / Overwhelm / Indecision / Exhaustion / Emotional and Financial Bankruptcy Having More: Joy / Hope / Confidence / Balance / Abundance / Peace / Energy / Motivation / Clarity / Action / Time / Fun / Productivity / Freedom / Courage / Money Seriously, can you really do all that? No, not without you! This isn’t a get the “Cliff Notes” to happiness program; it’s more like a gym. I’m your personal trainer and I provide the equipment and the environment for you to succeed. You have my resources and training at your disposal - BUT - it’s up to you to use them. We share the responsibility of this journey together. I will hold you accountable to your word, and remind you we're in this together! So, my answer is yes - passionately, wildly, YES, we can do all that and more! What kind of resources are you talking about? I have a treasure trove of goodies in addition to our regular coaching sessions, like - Program Homework, Assessments Tests, Reading, Referrals, Writing Exercises, Drawing, Puzzles and Action Assignments. We’ll select what’s best for you, and in the end, probably use them all! How do we do this coaching thing? One of the greatest testaments to the power of coaching is it’s powerfully effective in many mediums. Some coaches have local “face to face” practices and some do speaking tours. Corporate coaches often go on site to deliver their programs. Many coaches have international practices sustained entirely via phone, fax and e-mail. I utilize several methods to best serve my clients needs, but most often it's as easy as picking up the phone! Policies and procedures you should know up front: Rescheduling: Coaching time is priority time for both of us. Changes in our schedules are inevitable from time to time, but please provide a 24-hour notice except in the case of an emergency. Billing: Payment in full, for the program selected, is due at our first appointment each 4 session block or program cycle. I accept Paypal, (send money to: [email protected]), and cashiers checks. Failure to pay on time, or without repeated prompting hurts our working relationship as much as not showing up or multi tasking during our sessions. Please handle your payments promptly. To send money via Paypal, simply go to Paypal.com and click on the link to send money. The designated fees are: $450.00US for a block of four, 45 min sessions over 4 consecutive weeks, (barring holidays and vacations). Alternate plans are available at varying rates. Meeting less frequently adds a 10% up charge to the session blocks. Less frequent appointments will weaken the support I can provide and are not advised during the beginning phase of your coaching. (non-applicable for pro-bono



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agreements) Extra Time: If we run over, don’t worry. I’m prepared for some things to take longer than the scheduled time - some things, not everything. E-mail and Updates: If you’re facing a difficult challenge or an exciting development, I want to know. Call, text, or e-mail me for a quick update - included in your regular coaching fees. Confidentiality: The client/coach relationship is both personal and highly professional. My clients must always feel safe in what they share. I encourage you to share the unexaggerated truth with me – I’m ready to hear it and it remains safely in my care. I have a strict NO DISCLOSURE policy. Referrals: I love and appreciate them! When you begin to see results - please share your experience and my name, with others. Interrupting you: From time to time you might slide into something called 'story mode'. Story Mode is not a bad thing, but it can confuse the dynamics that really need to be addressed, and it can eat up a lot of time during a coaching session. If I hear you go 'down the rabbit hole' into story, I'm going to interrupt you. I'll gently, but firmly, interrupt and ask two things: 1) What about this is coachable, and let's cut to that, or is it possible that you just that 2) Need to vent? If you need to vent, that's fine, but we'll have to keep it brief. Otherwise, I'll ask you to cut right to the coachable part of the situation. I do this for a few very important reasons. Which, I always articulate during an intake session. Satisfaction Guarantee: I intend to bring the best of myself to my clients and strive to provide value during every call. We close each call with a brief assessment of that value in order to be sure we’re on track together. If for any reason, you don’t feel you’re getting the value you expected within the first 2 sessions, you can request a full refund of all fees paid to date. Your success is important whether it’s as my client or not. If we discontinue our relationship, I’ll gladly help place you with another coach if you wish. Call Etiquette: Please, give yourself the gift of our time together. Make sure you’re in a quiet place, free from interruptions and distractions. A few things you need to know about our sessions: There are several things that set the coaching relationship apart from a friendly chat with friends. Some of them may seem a bit odd at first, or feel a bit strange. That's ok. I'll list the key ones here to help easy you into the notion of them. Please feel free to ask questions!

• Our time is valuable and I want you to get the very most out of your investment. If I sense you're heading off into 'story mode', (longer winded stories that might not be anything more than just sharing), I'll interrupt. At that point, I'll ask if what you're talking about is a coachable moment or not. I defer to you in this, always. But if there is a coachable moment, I'll move us quickly to it. It's not because I don't love your stories, it's because I value your time and results.

• Once you start coaching, no matter what we are coaching about, I'll ask for actions that move you toward your goals. These can be new habits, new thoughts, conversations, 'doing' of many varieties. This always involves my asking, “what happened?” as to follow up and discuss your results. I will strive to hold you accountable to your commitments and your word. This often stirs up some stickiness around being held accountable. This is normal, and we will simply talk our way through the steps together.



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• You're going to be uncomfortable in almost every session, and often in between sessions. Why? Because it's my job to help you explore the edges of your comfort zone. It's my job to bring you to those edges, again and again, helping them expand. It is thrilling, inspiring, evolutionary, and often uncomfortable or scary. It's ok. You're always safe with me, and we can always take a little step backwards to ease the discomfort if it's too much.

Personal Message I read a quote one time that went something like; “My purpose on this earth is to gather good information and pass it along.” At the time, I didn’t note the author and have always regretted it. For at that moment, I realized my mission in life was written right before my eyes. I researched and gathered information, from the teachings of the intellectual giants who came before me, and you know what I discovered? I found that while technology has advanced by leaps and bounds, we - people in general - have not. Many generations of people have thought the same thoughts as the generations before them. We still wrestle with self-image, concerns of failure and success, just as our forefathers have from as far back as time records. It really hit home when I read quotes from philosophers that died thousands of years ago, that sounded eerily like the subject on today’s network talk show. Think about it..... at the end of another unproductive day, at a job you tolerate, you stand waiting for the elevator to arrive. While you wait, don’t you sometimes wonder if you’ll ever have enough time, energy, passion, motivation and money to have the things you really want for yourself? Do you really think you’ve come so far from your great-great-great grandparents? What do you think they were thinking? Things you should know about working with me:

• I'm quirky and funny • I talk fast, but you can always tell me to slow down • Nothing scares me. There is no mess in your life that will frighten me off! • I'm fine if you need to cry, get angry, vent, be confused, be overwhelmed, or change gears. I

will however, always ask about the 'why' behind it all, and dig for insights and inspirations. Thank you for your time and consideration! I look forward to being part of your amazing life! Best always - Coach (Insert Your Name) Phone Email Instant Message



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APPENDIX C.

THE ICF PLEDGE OF ETHICS

As an ICF Professional Coach, I acknowledge and agree to honor my

ethical and legal obligations to my coaching clients and sponsors,

colleagues, and to the public at large.

I pledge to comply with the ICF Code of Ethics, and to practice these

standards with those whom I coach.

If I breach this Pledge of Ethics or any part of the ICF Code of Ethics, I

agree that the ICF in its sole discretion may hold me accountable for so

doing.

I further agree that my accountability to the ICF for any breach may

include sanctions, such as loss of my ICF membership and/or my ICF

Credentials. I, ______________________________________________________, do hereby agree to the above. Print Name Signature: _______________________________________________ Date: ___________________________________________________ Approved by the Ethics and Standards Committee on October 30, 2008.



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Appendix D.

Coaching Practice – Competency Score Card

Applicant’s Name: ______________ Date of Assessment: _______

Taped or Live: ________________ Evaluation by: ____________

Recommendation:

Competency and Description Comments

Establishing the Coaching Agreement – Ability to understand what is required in the specific coaching interaction and to come to agreement with the prospective client about the coaching process and relationship.

Establishing Trust and Intimacy with the Client – Ability to create a safe, supportive environment that produces ongoing mutual respect and trust.

Coaching Presence – Ability to be fully conscious and create spontaneous relationship with the client, employing a style that is open, flexible, and confident.

Comfortable being the coach? BE-ing the coach?

Active Listening – Ability to focus completely on what the client is not saying, to understand the meaning of what is said in the context of the client’s desires. And to support client self-expression.

Calling out important patterns? Hearing concerns?

Powerful Questioning – Ability to ask questions that reveal the information needed for maximum benefit to the



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coaching relationship and the client.

Leads to most important.

Lead to orientation, awareness, or insight?

Direct Communication – Ability to communicate effectively during coaching sessions, and to use language that has the greatest positive impact on the client.

Jargon free? Able to share in a coach manner?

Creating Awareness – Ability to integrate and accurately evaluate multiple sources of information, and to make interpretations that help the client to gain awareness and thereby achieve agreed upon results.

Direct awareness toward the result?

How use this toward what you want? Leverage awareness.

Designing Actions – Ability to create with the client opportunities for ongoing learning during coaching session and in work/life situations, and for taking new actions that will most effectively lead to agreed upon coaching results.

What are you going to do?

Planning and Goal Setting – Ability to develop and maintain an effective coaching plan with the client.

How? What is supporting you? Why?

Bring values back in.

Managing Progress and Accountability – Ability to hold attention on what is important for the client and to leave responsibility with the client to take action.

How can we know when you have accomplished this?

How might it have been different? (insert notes)



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Copyright © 2013-2016 by Impact Coaching AcademyCoach... · 2015-10-28 · However, the ICF is not the only coaching organization, there are many! There are some that are also schools,